Dawn Frost
by KatieK101
Summary: Crowfrost: the handsome new deputy of ShadowClan. Dawnpelt: the beautiful daughter of Rowanstar. She-cats worship him, toms drool over her. He's fierce and she's fiery. She's smart and he's witty. He resents his Clanmates. She's tired of being seen as just a pretty face. They hate each other. But when they're forced to work together, can a friendship - or something more - bloom? AU
1. Sometimes Its Hard Being Me

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

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 **Chapter One - It's Not Easy Being Me**

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 **"Cause the haters goanna hate, I'm just goanna shake it off." – Taylor Swift**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

Sometimes it was hard being me.

Oh, who was I kidding? It was always hard being me!

Crowfrost. The handsome new deputy of ShadowClan, who was practically perfect in every possible way.

Alright, maybe perfect was a bit of a stretch. No one was perfect, and no one ever would be. But I was so close that it was _scary_.

Call me arrogant if it helps you feel better about yourself, but in my defense, I was only so cocky because of what my Clanmates always told me. 'Oh Crowfrost, you're so handsome!' 'Oh Crowfrost, Rowanstar couldn't have chosen a better deputy!' 'Oh Crowfrost, you're practically perfect in every possible way!' Was it sad that my Clanmates adored me even more then StarClan themselves? Yes. But who was I to crush their admiration?

"Well, well, well," a voice meowed from behind me, and I flicked an ear as I recognized Scorchfur. The dark gray tom was padding over to my side and sat down beside me, mischief dancing in his amber eyes. "Looks like yet another she-cat has her heart set on you."

I blinked and followed Scrochfur's gaze until my frosty blue orbs landed on a pale brown tabby she-cat with light green eyes. Grassheart. Our eyes met for only a second before she blushed and looked down at her paws, and I bit back a stinging retort. "I'm good," I meowed curtly, and then stood up so that I could head towards the Warriors' Den. I could feel my friend's amber eyes bore into the back of my head, but I pretended to ignore the burning sensation.

Scorchfur wouldn't ask why the teasing comment bothered me. He already knew; Grassheart trained in the Dark Forest as an apprentice.

I heaved a heavy sigh as I laid down in my nest and started to groom my sleek black fur. Scorchfur would follow me into the den, I knew he would. He always did.

"You know, you can't hate them forever." Ah, there he was. I looked up and saw the dark gray warrior standing in front of the den entrance.

"It's their fault." I said simply. Scorchfur sighed, more tired than annoyed, and padded lightly over to his nest, which was right beside mine. "Careful," I teased, in an attempt to lighten the mood. "You're starting to sound like an elder."

Scorchfur's head shot up and a look of indignation flashed across his features. "I'm younger than you are!" He protested. I purred and nudged his shoulder, relief flooding through my body when he didn't press the topic. I didn't like discussing it.

"I was only joking; lighten up."

Scorchfur snorted. "What, like you? If you ask me you're already too light as it is."

"You're just jealous that every she-cat in every Clan desires me." I retorted childishly.

Scorchfur rolled his amber eyes. "First off, I have a mate who is expecting my kits that I'm quite fond of, and couldn't care less about any other she-cat-"

"Suck up."

"Secondly, you sound like an arrogant fur-ball."

"No, I sound like a _handsome_ arrogant fur-ball."

"Thirdly it is impossible to _sound handsome_ , and lastly, what good does it do you to have she-cats mooning over you if you don't have any interest in taking a mate?" Scorchfur finished, sounding annoyed.

"Hey!" I protested. "It's not that I'm not interested! It's just... I haven't found the right she-cat yet."

Scorchfur gave me a look of unbelief. "That's why you've had flings with Ivytail, Olivenose, Pinenose, and Sedgewhisker, right?"

"Okay, in my defense I didn't know demanding Ivytail was, or how awkward it would be to be mates with my former apprentice, or how much of a gossip Pinenose is, and I forget Sedgewhisker was in WindClan."

The dark gray tom raised an eyebrow. "And how, pry tell, did you forget that Sedgewhisker lived in WindClan?"

"I... got lost in her eyes?" I offered weakly. Scorchfur shook his head.

"You're terrible."

I sighed and laid my head on my paws, sobering up. "Alright, so maybe I'm a bit of a player. But I... it just..." I huffed, frustrated when I didn't have the words to describe how I felt. "I-I don't know how to describe it."

"Clearly."

"I mean, I guess I want a mate," I continued, ignoring my friend's jab. "I just don't know how to tell which she-cat is the right one. It's like... how do you feel every time you look into Snowbird's eyes?"

A smile slowly played across Scorchfur's lips, and his amber eyes became alight with adoration. "Like I would die for her in a heart-beat." He meowed without hesitation. "I would do anything for her. I want to be by her side forever, make her every wish come true, absorb all the pain's she's ever felt, and make sure she'll never feel it again." His eyes met mine. "I don't really have the words to describe it, other then I love her."

I chuckled dryly. "Well, I guess I can scratch Ivytail, Olivenose, Pinenose, and Sedgewhisker off the list. I've never felt that way about anyone, ever. The closet I've ever come to feeling like that towards a she-cat is with Whitewater, but I don't think ShadowClan would approve me mating with my deceased foster-mother." I groaned dramatically. "Oh Scorchfur, why couldn't you have been born a she-cat?! Then I wouldn't have any problem finding a mate!"

Scorchfur cuffed my ear. "Stop that right now," he ordered. "It's creepy."

I shook my head. "No, really, it would have solved everything! You're warrior name could have been Scorchsky, or maybe Scorchheart. No, wait, I have it: Scorchpetal! It's perfect!"

"You," Scorchfur growled. "Are an incompetent lizard-brain who is going to burn this clan to the ground."

"And you are my soul mate trapped in a tom's body, _Scorchpetal_." I retorted. "Get over it."

Scorchfur opened his mouth, a witty remark on the tip of his tongue, when someone cleared their throat. My head spun around and I saw Stoatfur, looking rather confused. "Um, am I interrupting something?" she asked. Scorchfur developed a sudden interest in his nest, and I shook my head _. Alright, playtime's over._

"Not a thing," I replied smoothly. "What's up, Stoatfur?"

The tortoiseshell-and-white she-cat perked up noticeably and seemed to glow when I said her name, as if I'd just told her she was the most beautiful she-cat I'd ever laid eyes on. I didn't know whether to smirk because the she-cats made it too easy, or to roll my frost-colored eyes. "Rowanstar wants to see you in his den," she explained. I nodded and thanked her briskly, and the young she-cat pranced away happily.

"It's sad that all you have to do is say their name, and she-cats throw themselves at you," Scorchfur observed.

I shrugged, as I finally allowed myself to smirk. "It is," I agreed. "But I can't help it that I'm just so desirable. And let's face it: if you were a she-cat, you'd act the exact same way."

The dark gray tom's eyes widened, before he shuddered. "I'm afraid you might be right."

 **Dawn Frost**

I could feel my Clanmates' eyes trail me as I padded towards Rowanstar's den. Most of them were she-cats who stared at me like I was a StarClan warrior, but jealously shone clearly in the toms' eyes. I was tempted to shoot a glare their way before I discarded the idea. Not only was I their Clan deputy, but I was young considering the position. I was an outstanding warrior. I was handsome. I had dozens of she-cats from every Clan throwing themselves at me. I had nothing to prove to anyone.

 _Let them be jealous_. It's not like it wasn't justified.

I paused outside Rowanstar's den and twitched my ear. Even though his voice was shushed, I could tell he was arguing with someone. "But this is so unfair! You promised-"

"For the last time Dawnpelt, I'm not changing my mind!" I curled my upper lip when Rowanstar confirmed my suspicions. He was arguing with Dawnpelt; his daughter. _Dawnpelt._ Ugh. Her name left a bad taste in my mouth.

Dawnpelt was spoiled rotten by her Clan, always praised for everything she did. From catching a toad on her first hunting expedition to defending ShadowClan with all her might. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if Rowanstar wasn't her father, but alas he was, and she had him wrapped securely around her paw. Now that I actually thought about it, this was one of the few times I'd ever heard them fight. It was usually Tawnypelt who had to put Dawnpelt in her place.

Dawnpelt had a fiery personality and quick wits to go along with it. She was intelligent, loyal, brutally honest, and my hatred for her grew every time she opened her mouth. However I seemed to be the only one to despise her, probably because she was breathtakingly gorgeous. In that aspect I supposed she could be considered my counterpart; toms drooled over her like she-cats threw themselves at me. Except, unlike me, Dawnpelt hated how much attention she received from toms. Something about how she wasn't some prize to be won, or some other junk. I never really listened.

It was just as well that I loathed the creamy-colored she-cat, for she despised the very ground that I walked on.

I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I didn't notice the she-cat burst out of Rowanstar's den, and before I could even think about moving out of her way, we collided head-on. I was almost knocked off my paws and groaned when my head started to throb, and shot the she-cat in front of me an icy glare. "Watch where you're going, _Dawnpelt_!" I spat her name like it was an insult.

"Watch where you're standing, _Crowfrost_!" Dawnpelt hissed, as venom dripped from her voice. "Who just stands in front of Rowanstar's den?!"

"His deputy, who was waiting on you to finish your argument!" I retorted. "And by the way, no, my skull _doesn't_ feel broken, but thanks for asking!"

Dawnpelt snorted. "Oh please, you're skull is as thick as they come. Nothing short of a monster could have a hope of cracking it."

I smiled sweetly and meowed, "Don't underestimate yourself, sweetheart; you're just as heavy as one." Dawnpelt's chestnut-colored orbs widened.

"Lizard-face!"

"Fox-breath!"

"Mouse-heart!"

"Dung-face!"

"That's enough!" Rowanstar's voice boomed from the entrance of his den, and I flattened my ears against my head. Dawnpelt's hazel gaze fell on her paws, ashamed. But I wasn't fooled; I saw storms destroying forests in her eyes. "What's the meaning of this?" Rowanstar demanded. "Great StarClan, were you trying to gain StarClan's attention? Because you sure gained everyone else's!"

I glanced briefly around camp and saw that our Clanmates had stopped what they were doing, and watched us with a mixture of emotions splashed across their faces. I only had to narrow my frosty blue eyes before they quickly looked away, and went on with their business. _That's what I thought._ Rowanstar exhaled heavily when neither of us answered him, and he turned to look at Dawnpelt. "Really?" He questioned, sounding like they'd had this conversation a thousand times before, and he'd grown tired of repeating it.

Dawnpelt looked like a mixture between shocked and betrayed. "Why are you looking at me?!" she demanded. "Crowfrost's the one who started it!"

I scoffed. "Me? Oh, please! I was just waiting for my audience with Rowanstar, when you come racing out of his den like a hive of wasps were chasing you! If I had known you were going to tare across the camp, I would have moved."

Rowanstar growled, his amber eyes never leaving Dawnpelt. "Is this true?" He demanded. For a minute Dawnpelt looked like she didn't know what to say, as she didn't seem to be able to put together coherent sentence. If I weren't so aggravated with the pretty she-cat I would have found her flailing amusing.

"W-well I just... it's only because..." Dawnpelt's frustration built at a rapid pace and it wasn't long until she was acting like a fox I a fit. "It's your fault I rushed out anyways!" she snarled. "Just leave me alone!" And with that the hazel-eyed she-cat shoved roughly past us and stormed out of camp.

"Well," I started bitterly. "I see your daughter is just as pleasant as usual."

Rowanstar sighed heavily and shook his head. "I can't say her reaction surprised me, although I had been hoping that she would take the news better…" I glanced away from the camp exit and looked curiously at Rowanstar. _What news?_

"Come on," Rowanstar said with a flick of his tail. "You've waited long enough." I nodded and followed him into the Leader's Den, where he and Tawnypelt slept. The large ginger tom padded over to his grassy nest and sat down, before giving me his full attention. "It's almost time for Wasppaw's Warrior Ceremony," he explained.

My ears perked forward. Wasppaw's final assessment had been held at dawn, right after I finished assigning patrols. I wasn't aware that it had already ended; Wasppaw was definitely going to be a strong warrior. "So then he passed?" I inquired.

Rowanstar's eyes gleamed with pride as he answered, "Tigerheart said that he performed flawlessly." A small smirk traced my features. Tigerheart was Rowanstar's son, and Wasppaw was his very first apprentice. Rowanstar was proud that Tigerheart was capable of training such an impressive apprentice.

I was also proud. Wasppaw had been the last kit born to Shrewfoot and Toadfoot, the latter who had died a noble death while fighting the Dark Forest. My frosty-blue eyes darkened as I thought about him; Toadfoot, although we weren't as close as Scorchfur and I, or Smokefoot and I, had been a friend of mine. We shared the same dens for many moons, and it was still strange to walk into the Warriors Den and not see his nest. Shrewfoot retired to the Elder's Den shortly after his death. _Were you watching Wasppaw this morning, Toadfoot?_ I couldn't help but wonder.

"When are we holding the ceremony?" I asked.

"Tomorrow afternoon," came Rowanstar's reply. "Right before the evening patrols go out."

I nodded, absorbing the information and making a mental note to delay the evening patrols. Thinking that the conversation was over with, I stood to my paws. "Sounds like a plan," I meowed. "Now if you'll excuse me, I-"

"I wasn't done yet, Crowfrost."

My tail dropped and I fought back a sigh of defeat. _Great,_ I knew where this was going. "Yes, Rowanstar?" I asked purely out of formalities. I knew what else he wanted to discuss.

Rowanstar seemed to sense this. He stood to his paws as well, and beckoned me to follow him to the lip of the den entrance. Once there we both sat down, and for a moment neither of us said anything. We simply observed the Clan's activates, watching as the returned from the dawn patrols, ate fresh-kill, and shared tongues. "You know it can't be avoided," Rowanstar finally meowed.

"Not avoided," I replied mildly. "Just put off."

Rowanstar turned to look at me, eyes narrowed. "I know you're not on good terms with Ratscar, but his kits have done nothing to deserve your malice. As the Clan deputy it's your job to put aside any personal differences you may have with your Clanmates."

 _No, as the Clan deputy it's my job to assign patrols and be present as ceremonies,_ I thought bitterly. But I dared not voice my thought, for only Dawnpelt could get any with such a comment. _I_ would get my ears shredded. So instead I dipped my head and said, "You're right, it's just… a challenge." Clearing my throat I went on. "So then I assume you want to discuss mentors for Hailkit, Honeykit, and Cloverkit?"

Rowanstar nodded. "That's right. I already have one in mind for Hailkit though."

"Oh? Who?"

"You. You haven't had an apprentice since Olivenose, and she's turned out to be a credit to ShadowClan. I'm sure that you're capable of training another excellent warrior." I gritted my teeth as Rowanstar spoke. It was obvious that although he worded it like a suggestion, he'd already made up his mind. There would be no changing it. Besides, I suspected he had ulterior motive for assigning me Ratscar's son.

But ulterior motive or not, I couldn't help but feel a bit excited at the prospect of mentoring another apprentice. It truly was an honor to receive an apprentice, and Hailkit was a strong young cat. It wouldn't be hard to mold him into an impressive warrior, even if he was his father's legacy.

"I'll do my best," I promised.

"I expect nothing less." Rowanstar replied. "Now that leaves just Honeykit and Cloverkit."

I narrowed my frosty-blue orbs and focused on the two she-kits, who were tussling just outside the nursery, with Hailkit sitting a few tail-lengths away, watching them idly. Cloverkit, who was just slightly bigger than her sister, soon pinned Honeykit down, and mock growled in her face. I snorted, faintly amused by their antics. _I remember when that was me and Smokefoot._ I made a mental note to visit him in the Elders Den when I finished business with Rowanstar.

And actually, now that I thought about Smokefoot, I had the perfect mentor for Cloverkit. "What do you think about Owlclaw to mentor Cloverkit?" I suggested. "He's level-headed and an excellent hunter. Cloverkit's bound to be a natural when it comes to fighting; Owlclaw would balance her out nicely."

Rowanstar looked faintly impressed, and I assumed that he figured I wouldn't put much thought into choosing the kits' mentors. With an agreeable nod he said, "Owlclaw sounds like a good match for her. He's a good warrior." Although his attention had returned to the kits, he spared me a side glance. "Smokefoot trained him well."

"He did," I agreed. Maybe I was displaying a bit of favoritism towards my friend's former apprentice, but I had other reasons for suggesting Owlclaw. Smokefoot and I trained Olivenose and Owlclaw together, and I probably had a better relationship with him than I did my own apprentice. Plus Owlclaw hadn't stepped a single paw into the Dark Forest. If I was going to train Hailkit, who would undoubtedly want to train with his siblings, then I wanted the other mentor to be someone I liked.

"And now we have little Honeykit," Rowanstar meowed.

"I don't suppose she wants to train as a medicine cat?" I inquired. "She enjoys helping Littlecloud." But Rowanstar shook his head.

"I wish, but none of them have mentioned it to me. I think Honeykit's just curious." A thoughtful expression dawned on Rowanstar's features. "While I'm glad that Honeykit is curious, I don't want that curiosity to press her into getting into trouble. She needs someone who will keep a stern eye on her."

I shot the ginger tom a look. "Ivytail?"

"Ivytail." He confirmed.

" _Hmm_ ," I mused as I returned my attention to the kits. "Well, I can speak from personal experience that nothing gets past Ivytail. She'll keep a close eye on her for sure."

A smirk traced Rowanstar's lips. "Who would have thought that your player ways would be useful to assigning mentors to kits?" I rolled my frosty blue eyes. Even my Clan leader had labeled me a player.

Just then the kits' mock growls and snarls turned into excited squeals, and my head snapped around just in time to see them tackle… wait, _Dawnpelt_?

I stared in shock as the three kits danced around Dawnpelt's paws and crawled over her body. And she was _letting them_? Dawnpelt had a very strict "keep your paws to yourself" rule that every tom in ShadowClan was terrified of breaking. An accidental brush of your pelts? That was fine. But licking her nose or nuzzling her cheek? Yeah, _no_. Not if you valued your life.

But here she was, Miss Untouchable (literally!) was letting six moon old kits nip her ears and play with her tail. I'm not over-exaggerating when I say my jaw dropped to the ground.

From his spot beside me Rowanstar sighed, suddenly sounding like our conversation had drained the life out of him. I finally managed to drag my astonished gaze away from Dawnpelt and the kits, and regarded my leader carefully. He had worn that exact same expression when he finished fighting with Dawnpelt, and that realization led me to a new one; I still didn't know why they had been fighting in the first place.

The question must have appeared in my eyes because Rowanstar answered it before I could even ask. "Dawnpelt had hoped to mentor one of the kits," he explained. "At first I was willing, but the more I thought about it the more I questioned whether or not she's ready for such an important task."

"And you decided she wasn't?" I asked, a bit shocked. Dawnpelt always, **always** got what she wanted whenever Rowanstar was involved. To lead a patrol full of senior warriors when she was fresh out of the Apprentice Den? Done. Attend more Gatherings in one season than some cats did their entire lives? Of course. Heck, as a kit she had demanded that Ivytail be her mentor! Rowanstar had never even blinked at the mention of any of her previous requests. I wondered why this one was so different. "Any particular reason why?"

Rowanstar shook his head. "None that concern you."

 _Rude!_ I thought huffily, although I couldn't say his response surprised me. Just as I began to stand to my paws and excuse myself, Rowanstar spoke once more. "Crowfrost, I have a favor to ask you." I blinked when the large ginger tom sounded hesitant. Rowanstar was usually a very confident cat. Curious, I sat back down and nodded.

"Of course."

Rowanstar exhaled softly before saying, "I'm asking you this not as your clan leader, but as your friend and Clanmate. When you start training Hailkit, could you ask Dawnpelt for her assistance?"

My jaw dropped to the ground. Again.

"W- _what_?!"

Rowanstar didn't even flinch when I screeched. "Dawnpelt was convinced that she would mentor one of Ratscar's kits, especially when Tigerheart received Wasppaw. My reasons for not letting her are of no importance, but I would appreciate it if you would let her help you." He spoke so nonchalantly now, even though he was basically asking me to torture myself. What kind of _friend_ did he think I was?!

"I don't know if you've noticed this or not," I started a bit coldly. "But your _precious daughter_ and I don't tend to get along."

Rowanstar narrowed his eyes in a warning. "I'm fully aware of your relationship with _Dawnpelt_ , which is another reason why I'm asking you to do this. Crowfrost, you and Dawnpelt have more in common than you know."

I growled softly and lowered my gaze to my paws. I hated it when my Clanmates told me that Dawnpelt and I had a lot in common. As far as I was concerned, the only similarity we shared was that we were without doubt the most attractive tom and she-cat in ShadowClan. But the similarities ended there.

Rowanstar laid his tail across my back, and when I looked up I saw that his gaze had softened, although it remained firm. "It's not an order, Crowfrost," he said. "It's me asking my former apprentice for a favor." My whole body stiffened.

Oh. No. He. _Didn't_.

He **did not** just use the whole "former apprentice" excuse on me! _Why that sly, no-good, sorry excuse for a Clan leader/friend/former mentor! He knows I won't say 'no' when he puts it like that!_ Because for all my faults, I was _pathetically_ loyal. _Oh, he is_ good _!_

"Just think about it," Rowanstar continued smoothly. "I think it would be good for both of you." And without waiting to hear my response, he stood up and padded out of his den and towards Tawnypelt.

With a heavy, defeated sigh, I stood up as well and padded towards the Elders' Den. Smokefoot would love this.

 _I am never going to live long enough to become leader._

 **Dawn Frost**

I regretted my decision to tell Smokefoot about my dilemma almost immediately.

The smoky-black tom was currently laughing at me, very rudely so. I simply glared at him the entire time, and even used my special glare on him (the one I reserved for Dawnpelt), but he hardly noticed. He finally stopped laughing when his lungs could no longer handle it and he started coughing roughly. "Careful," I mocked him cruelly, fully aware of his breathing problems. That low-down, dirty, sorry excuse for a childhood best friend deserved it!

When Smokefoot continued to cough my bitterness gave way to concern. "Hey, are you okay? Should I go get Littlecloud?" I offered worriedly. But Smokefoot shook his head, and a few seconds later the coughing ceased.

"I-I should have mo-monitored myself," Smokefoot wheezed, as he fought to win his breath back.

 _He should have monitored how much he laughed?_ I thought sadly. _This is the cat who could run to the lake and back without feeling winded. And now he has to watch how much he_ _**laughs**? _ All of a sudden I was washed with an overwhelming desire to take on the entire Dark Forest by myself.

Smokefoot had taken a patrol to ThunderClan during the Dark Forest battle, and on their way back to ShadowClan, were ambushed by a few lingering traitors. Most of the patrol escaped with only a few scrapes or patches of missing fur, but they had slammed Smokefoot hard against a pine tree, permanently damaging his lungs. It soon became clear that while he was still quite young, Smokefoot would never be able to perform his usual warrior duties. Thus, he retired early to the Elders' Den at Littlecloud's urging. It broke my heart to see my childhood best friend in such a feeble state.

"Are you _sure_ you're okay?" I pressed. "Littlecloud's sorting his herbs right now, but your health is more important than a bunch of dumb flowers and stems."

"Crowfrost," Smokefoot said sharply. "I'm _fine_. If you go get Littlecloud, I'll shred your ears off your head."

I drew away from the dark tom and frowned. "Alright, _sheesh_. I was just trying to help."

Smokefoot rolled his dark blue eyes. "I don't need your help, lizard-brain. I just laughed a little too hard, that's all." I huffed and glared at the den walls, inwardly glad that the other elders were too busy sunning themselves outside to notice their Clan deputy pouting. _Stupid friend, always too stubborn for his own good._

I snapped out of my thoughts when Smokefoot laid his tail across my back. I looked up to see that his dark blue eyes were filled with amusement, and I frowned lightly. "Jerk."

"You know you're not really mad at me."

"I can still act like I am though."

Smokefoot rolled his eyes, although there was no venom behind the action. "Getting back to our conversation," he started, "why did Rowanstar ask _you_ of all cats to partner up with Dawnpelt? You're not exactly on friendly terms."

"That's what I said!" I exclaimed. "But _nooo,_ Rowanstar thinks this will be good for us, like we'll bond through Hailkit and form some unbreakable friendship and mutual respect." I rolled my pale-blue eyes. "He needs to just accept the fact that his daughter is a spoiled brat and we'll never get along. Everyone else has!" Smokefoot still looked amused.

 _Why isn't he taking my anger more seriously?_ Jerk.

"He really used 'former apprentice' excuse on you?" Smokefoot inquired.

I nodded fiercely. " **Yes**! He really did! I mean, how low is _that_?!"

Smokefoot shrugged his broad shoulders. "Well, in Rowanstar's defense-"

" _Wha_ \- Rowanstar doesn't get a defense! Don't you dare defend him!"

" _You_ used to brag about how the deputy was your mentor all the time after Blackstar selected him," Smokefoot continued, as if I hadn't even spoken. "And may I remind you that he became the deputy _after_ you became a warrior?"

Jerk. Jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk!

"Whose side are you on?" I challenged.

Smokefoot shrugged again, this time in a peaceful manner. "I'm not on anyone's side, Crowfrost. I'm just trying to help you see reason." _Help me see reason?_

I glared at him coldly. "You've been spending time with Scorchfur recently, haven't you?"

"… he might have stopped by this morning." Smokefoot looked at me curiously. "Do you honestly believe that if Scorchfur was a she-cat, all your problems would be solved?"

I groaned and laid down, so that I could bury my face in my paws. "Of course I don't!" I cried, my voice muffled. "I just like messing with that little snitch!" A pause, and then I smirked. "Did he really come in here to tattle on me?"

I didn't lift my head, but I heard Smokefoot's chuckle and could easily visualize his own smirk. "Not necessarily tattling on you, more like complaining."

We shared a soft chuckle and I finally looked up from my paws. "You know, Snowbird only has a couple moons until the kits are here. Then Scorchfur is going to be a father, and we're going to be uncles!" I sighed. "Who would've thought that Scorchfur would have a family before either of us?"

"Maybe because he's been padding after Snowbird ever since he could walk," the dark gray tom meowed. "Meanwhile we've been jumping from she-cat to she-cat like frogs jump on lily pads." Smoekfoot paused and wrinkled his nose. "Actually, when you think about it, it's a miracle that we _aren't_ fathers yet!"

I cocked my head to the side, curious. "Are you ever going to take a mate?" I asked. "Or are you going to continue your player ways even from the Elders' Den?"

Smokefoot licked a paw and drew it over his ear. "Who knows?"Came his vauge response.

I opened my jaws to pester him about it when a new voice beat me to it. "Smokefoot, Littlecloud asked me to… am I interrupting something?" I turned around and barely resisted the urge to scowl when I saw Applefur; another traitor to ShadowClan. The mottled brown she-cat didn't meet my piercing blue gaze, and lowered her head shamefully. She knew how I felt about cats who trained in the Dark Forest.

"No, its fine," I said stiffly as I stood to my paws. "I was just leaving."

Applefur nodded, although she still didn't look up. I noticed she held a wad of honey between her jaws. _She must be delivering it for Littlecloud._ I couldn't help but frown. _Is the order of_ ** _herbs_** _really so important that Littlecloud sent a traitor to deliver Smokefoot's medicine?_ The next time Littlecloud left to meet with the other medicine cats, I was going to sneak into his den and rearrange all his precious herbs on purpose.

"I'll talk to you later, Crowfrost," Smokefoot meowed, as he laid his tail across my back. I nodded but didn't say another word as I strolled out of the den, leaving the two warriors alone, although I didn't trust Applefur to not find a way to poison the honey.

 _Maybe Rowanstar has a point,_ I thought idly to myself. _As the deputy I shouldn't play favorites with my Clanmates. But then again, how can I **not**? I thought I could trust every cat in ShadowClan at one point, and the next thing I know I'm being ambushed by cats who I used to sleep beside. _ I shrugged as I argued with myself. _It's their own fault I can't trust them, not mine. They only have themselves to blame._

I stopped walking for a moment. Dawnpelt was still playing with the kits, and Pinenose and Ratscar watched them proudly only a few fox-lengths away. I sighed inwardly when I noticed that Hailkit and Ratscar had the exact same build, along with the exact same dark blue eyes.

 _Disregarding the fact that mentoring an apprentice is an honor, I just don't understand how Rowanstar expects me to mentor the kit of a traitor. And with_ ** _Dawnpelt's_** _help no less!_

Today was my last day of blissful freedom. Tomorrow the torture would commence.

Sometimes it was hard being me.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **Are you partaking in Camp NaNo month this year?**

* * *

 **Hello KatieKats and those who have never heard the word before, welcome to my new story that I shouldn't be starting!**

 **But I actually have a legit reason for publishing this; this is my entry for Camp NaNo month! I wasn't planning on participating this month, but my FF BFF Jeffrey Dahmer talked me into it, so that we could support each other, and make sure the other didn't quit half-way through the month. So for the remainder of July my other stories will be on Hiatus, so that I can dedicate all my time to 'Dawn Frost'.**

 **Just to clear up any confusion, 'Dawn Frost' takes place after the Dark Forest Battle and about two moons after Blackstar's death, however the events of 'Bramblestar's Storm' will not be taking place; therefor, this story is slightly AU. Some cats who were mentioned as dead in BStorm are alive, and some who were mentioned as alive are dead. The allegiances will be posted at the end of the next chapter.**

 **For those of you who don't already know, Camp NaNo month is just like Nanowrimo month in November, except instead of the** 50k **word limit, you can choose your own personal goal. I've decided that my goal will be** 20k **words.**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to them with a PM.**


	2. I'm Surrounded by Madness - Allegiances

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

* * *

 **Chapter Two - I'm Surrounded by Madness**

* * *

 **"The eyes are the window of the soul." - Unknown**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

On the outside, I radiated waves of confidence. On the inside, I felt like I had ants crawling all over my body.

It was a little bit before dusk, around the time I would be organizing the evening patrols. However the patrols would be sent out a little later today than usual, due to a few certain ceremonies. Namely Wasppaw's warrior ceremony, and my _soon-to-be apprentice's_ ceremony. _Ugh, why didn't I protest this harder?_ I thought to myself as the clan gathered beneath the Tall Boulder, where Rowanstar would soon be standing. I was seated a little ways beneath him in the deputy's spot. _I don't want to train Hailkit! I don't want to train any of those kits!_ And certainly didn't want to train _any_ kit with Dawnpelt!

Speaking of the spoiled she-cat, she had padded into camp just a few moments ago. Judging by the large toad clamped between her jaws she just returned from a solo hunting trip. Confusion was splashed across her admittedly beautiful features, until Olivenose bonded over to her side and informed her of the ceremonies taking place. Anger instantly replaced her confusion, and I swear she looked right at me as if it was _my fault_ she wasn't getting an apprentice. _Don't look at me like that!_ I wanted to snarl. _It's not my fault you didn't get what you wanted for the first time in your life! I would hand Hailkit over to you in a heart-beat._

"I see the clan's already gathered," A voice from behind me commented. I nodded.

"Word spread that Wasppaw's ceremony would be held this evening. They must have gotten tired of waiting for you to call them together," I added teasingly, hoping that the remark would erase my unease. However I had no such luck, for the unease clung to my pelt like a tick on a dog.

But if Rowanstar noticed my unease he did a credible job of masking it. Instead he smiled lightly and said, "I'm proud of you, Crowfrost."

Huh?

"For taking everything so well," Rowanstar elaborated. "I know it won't be easy for you to mentor Hailkit, but you've taken it into stride and handled it like a seasoned warrior. As for Dawnpelt… well honestly, I thought for sure you would refuse to ask for her assistance." _You didn't give me a choice!_ "Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that you're making me proud, both as your clan leader and former mentor." He flashed me a grin. "I couldn't ask for a better deputy."

 _Well that's just fantastic. Now there's no way I can back out at the last second._ "Uh, don't mention it Rowanstar," I said, smiling weakly. _Really, don't._

The large ginger tom shot me one last grin before scaling the Tall Boulder, immediately grabbing the attention of his clanmates. "All cats old enough to catch their own prey join together for a clan meeting!" As the last remaining warriors seated themselves beneath the Tall Boulder, I had to admit, Rowanstar looked every inch the clan leader he was. His muscles rippled easily beneath his ginger tabby pelt, and he stood with a confidence that gained over many moons. He looked ready to take on the world.

 _Funny how he can't keep his daughter in line._ Sorry. Couldn't resist.

"Cats of ShadowClan, today we are gathered for two of the most important ceremonies a clan leader can make; the making of warriors and apprentices." Rowanstar gestured for Wasppaw to take his place directly beneath the Tall Boulder, and the ginger and brown tom complied. Tigerheart walked alongside his apprentice, chest puffed out with pride.

As Rowanstar preformed the required words, I felt my unease slowly slip away. _Are you proud of him too, Toadfoot?_ I wondered. _Are you watching your only son become a fierce ShadowClan warrior?_ Almost as if Toadfoot was responding to me, I felt a gentle breeze glide through the camp, ruffling my black pelt in the process. My cocky expression gave way to a small smile. _I'll take that as a yes._

Tuning back into the ceremony, I heard Rowanstar say "I, Rowanstar, leader of ShadowClan, call upon my warrior ancestors to look down on this apprentice. He had trained hard to understand the ways of your noble code, and I commend him to you as a warrior in his turn. Wasppaw, do you promise to uphold the warrior code and to protect and defend this Clan, even at the cost of your life?"

Wasppaw sat up straight as he answered boldly, "I do."

Rowanstar looked proud. "Then by the powers of StarClan I give you your warrior name: Wasppaw, from this moment on you will be known as Waspstripe. StarClan honors your bravery and strength, and we welcome you as a full warrior of ShadowClan. Serve your Clan well, and with everything in you."

"Waspstripe! Waspstripe! Waspstripe!" The clan cheered loudly, practically shouting his name. I joined in as well, and shot the young tom a wink when our eyes met. _Atta boy, Waspstripe._ He grinned and dipped his head in understanding.

A few heart-beats later Shrewfoot appeared, showering her only kit with affection, and purring loud enough to drown out the rest of the clan. Waspstripe tolerated his mother for a minute before shoving her off of him, although he wore a smile. A couple of my clanmates chuckled and Rowanstar allowed the cheers to die down before going on.

"And now, the making of apprentices. Honeykit, Cloverkit, Hailkit, step forward." I felt my grin slip right off my (handsome) features. _Looks like the fun's over._

Cloverkit and her sister darted forward, squealing excitedly to each other, while Hailkit hung back a little, and marched forward with a certain dignity to him. I snorted.

Rowanstar seemed amused as he started with Cloverkit's ceremony, preformed the required words and then assigned Owlclaw as her mentor. The dark gray she-cat seemed elated with Rowanstar's choice, and eagerly stepped forward to touch noses with Owlclaw. Owlclaw was practically glowing with pride as he followed through with the customary gesture, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw Smokefoot was watching his former apprentice proudly.

Then came Honeykit's turn. The golden tabby she-cat looked ready to burst out of her fur she was so excited, and her blue eyes brightened when Rowanstar announced that Ivytail would be her mentor. The tortoiseshell she-cat seemed pleased with her new apprentice and they too touched noses.

Dread filled my belly when I realized that it was finally time for Hailkit to be made my apprentice. "Hailkit," Rowanstar started. "You have reached the age of six moons, and it is time for you to become an apprentice. From this day on until you earn your warrior name you will be known as Hailpaw. Your mentor will be Crowfrost."

 _This is it. No turning back now._ I smiled confidently and stepped down to meet Hailpaw while Rowanstar finished the customary words, but was taken back when Hailpaw looked… _disappointed_? My smile froze on my features; was I reading this tom right? Surely he couldn't be disappointed with having the _deputy_ as his mentor.

"Crowfrost, you are ready to take on another apprentice. You received excellent training from your mentor, and have shown yourself to be brave and loyal. I hope that you will pass on everything you know to Hailpaw." _Funny how he assigns someone so "loyal" to the kit of a traitor,_ I thought resentfully.

But of course I couldn't voice my thought, so instead I said, "I'll do my best." After that I stepped forward and leaned down to touch noses with Hailpaw, who after a heart-beat of hesitation, did the same.

"Cloverpaw! Honeypaw! Hailpaw! Cloverpaw! Honeypaw! Hailpaw!" ShadowClan took up the traditional chant just as they had done with Waspstripe, but I noticed a couple of them exchanging curious glances with one another, and then looking at me. _They know how I feel about the Dark Forest trainees. They're probably wondering if I agreed ahead of time to mentor Hailpaw, or if Rowanstar surprised me._ I couldn't say I blamed them.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw that Ratscar and Pinenose, although they joined in the chanting, wore concerned expressions. _Because I'm mentoring Hailpaw,_ I thought. _Well don't worry; I don't want to mentor him anymore than you want me to._

"Congratulations, guys!" A voice exclaimed, snapping me out of my observations. Ashpaw, who was now the oldest apprentice in ShadowClan despite being only two moons older than Hailpaw and his littermates, bounded forwards to greet her new denmates.

"Thanks," Hailpaw meowed immediately, and I blinked when he perked up noticeably. _Wha-?_

Cloverpaw and Honeypaw mewed their thanks as well, looking quite excited now that they were no longer kits. Ashpaw directed her attention to the mentors which, unfortunately, included me. "If you don't mind, I can show them where to get the best moss and help them build their nests?" The sleek gray she-cat offered.

Owlclaw and Ivytail glanced at me, and I realized that whatever I did, they would do as well. "I don't mind," I said with a shrug. "I have to organize the dusk patrols now anyways, and it would be better to show him the territory when the sun is brighter."

"Same here," Owlclaw meowed.

Ivytail fixed Honeypaw with a stern eye. "Don't leave Ashpaw's side," she ordered. "If I find out you gave her any trouble, you'll spend your first day as an apprentice checking the elders for ticks."

Honeypaw's light blue eyes widened and she nodded fiercely. "I won't!" She squeaked, probably scared out of her fur. I chuckled to myself; Rowanstar had been right to assign Ivytail to the curious apprentice. She would keep her out of trouble for sure.

Masking her amusement, Ashpaw dipped her head to the mentors one last time before trotting out of the camp, the three new apprentices scurrying behind her. "She'll have her paws full," Owlclaw remarked.

I shrugged. "Eh, she's Tawnypelt's apprentice. She can handle it." I glanced at my companions. "Well since neither of you have anything apparent to do, I don't suppose-"

"Hey Crowfrostyfrost!"

I stiffened before clenching my eyes shut and groaning; I felt a head-ache coming on. _Maybe I should have taken Hailpaw out after all…_ "What do you want, Ferretclaw?"

The cream-and-gray tom slid to a stop right in front of me, his blue eyes bright. "I just wanted to congratulate you on receiving an apprentice!" He exclaimed. "That's a pretty great honor, you know. And lucky Hailpaw, getting a warrior as fantastic as you for a mentor! I bet he was shaking in his pelt, he must have been so excited."

"Yeah," I said wearily, as I recalled the disappointment that had shined in his dark blue eyes. "Something like that."

The cream-and-gray tom sighed wistfully. "I wish you could have been my mentor," he meowed. "We could have had so much fun training! Don't you think so, Crowy?"

Ivytail and Owlclaw chuckled, and I growled lowly. "I told you not to call me that."

See, Ferretclaw is the clan idiot. He's oblivious, annoying, loves to make horrible puns, and even more than that, he loves to give everyone horrible nicknames. But what does he love even more than that; why, ShadowClan's prized deputy, of course. For whatever reason Ferretclaw firmly believed that we were – ugh, StarClan I hate even thinking the word – _best friends_. And no matter how many times I told him, "Ferretclaw, you're annoying", "Ferretclaw, I hate you", "Ferretclaw, I would rather have a fox claw out my eyeballs than hang out with you", all he ever did was laugh and pad happily away.

And yet somehow I always ended up on the same patrols as him.

But not today!

"If you excuse me," I said rather stiffly. "I have patrols to organize." Turning my back on the gray-and-cream tom, I looked at Ivytail and Owlclaw. "Ivytail, can you lead a border patrol to the ThunderClan border?" I asked. The she-cat meowed that she could, and asked who she should take. After racking my brain for a second I replied, "Take Tawnypelt, Stoatfur, and… Waspstripe. I'm sure he's dying to go on his first patrol as a warrior." Ivytail nodded and went off to round up her patrol.

"I suppose you want me to lead a hunting patrol?" Owlclaw guessed.

"Crowy?"

I nodded, and tried to ignore how Ferretclaw had started playing with my tail. "Yep. Go ahead and take Scorchfur-"

"Frostycrow?"

"Spikefur-"

"Crowfrostypaws?"

"And…"

"Crowfrostmoss?"

Finally I couldn't handle it anymore. Spinning around with lightning-like reflexes I snarled, "What in the name of StarClan could you possibly want, Ferretclaw?!"

Ferretclaw didn't looked affected by the fact that I was ready to lunge for his throat, and said pleasantly, "I would like to join a patrol."

I was ready to kill a cat. "Fine then, you can join Owlclaw's patrol!" I snapped.

Owlclaw, who had been grinning broadly in amusement only a few heart-beats ago, shot me a look of betrayal. _Sorry Owlclaw,_ I shrugged. _It's nothing against you._ Besides, for all his many, many faults, Ferretclaw was actually a fine hunter. Not that I would ever tell _him_ that.

Ferretclaw's ears perked up. "Okay," he agreed. "Are you coming with us, Crowfrosty-"

"No!" I barked.

"Actually Crowfrost," my eyes widened when I heard Rowanstar's voice behind me. _Oh StarClan, please no!_ "Since you don't have Hailpaw right now, why don't you join them? It'll be good for you to stretch your legs a bit."

Ferretclaw gasped with delight and I clenched my eyes shut. _What did I ever do to deserve this?_

 **Dawn Frost**

"And then Crowfrost made this _spectacular leap_ and tackled the eagle right out of the air!"

"That never happened, Ferretclaw," I growled.

The cream-and-gray tom shrugged. "Well it could."

Owlclaw and Spikefur exchanged tired glances with each other, and Scorchfur snorted from his spot beside me. "Why is he so obsessed with you?" Scorchfur hissed, annoyance lacing his tone. I couldn't say I blamed him; Ferretclaw hadn't shut up ever since we left camp.

"As if I know!" I hissed right back.

"Oh, and then there was this one time-"

"Hey Ferretclaw!" I suddenly exclaimed. "Why don't you go check out the marshes and see if you can't catch a toad or two. You've always hunted well in the marshes." I smirked to myself, pleased that I had thought up an excuse to get the annoying tom out of my pelt.

Ferretclaw's jaw dropped and he looked at me like I was a StarClan warrior. "Y-you mean you've noticed?!"

The entire patrol groaned.

 **Dawn Frost**

"Well that was torture," Scorchfur remarked as we padded into camp.

I nodded as made my way over to the fresh-kill pile and deposited my two lizards. Scorchfur added in the frog he caught. Licking my lips, I said, "At least it's not _you_ he's obsessed with."

Scorchfur looked thoughtful for a moment before asking, "Hey, if Ferretclaw was a she-cat, what do you think his warrior name would be?" I blinked.

"That's a strange question, don't you think?" But when Scorchfur looked serious I shrugged. "Oh, I don't know. Maybe Ferretheart? Ferretpelt?"

"Hm," Scorchfur mused. "You know, it's a shame that _Ferretclaw_ wasn't born a she-cat. Then you wouldn't have any trouble finding a mate!"

I shot the smirking gray tom a look of absolute repulsion as our conversation from yesterday come flooding back to me. "That's not funny," I growled.

"I thought it was kinda funny."

"I would choose you over Ferretclaw in a heart-beat, even if you were still a tom!"

Scorchfur looked slightly creeped out. "This conversation is getting awkward."

I shrugged. "It's your fault for bringing it up." With that last comment I raised my head and scanned the camp for a certain creamy-colored pelt. _Now, where is she?_

"Looking for someone?" Scorchfur asked.

"Dawnpelt," I muttered as a response. "I have to ask her about helping me mentor Hailpaw."

Scorchfur blinked, surprise alighting his amber eyes. "You mean you're really going through with that?"

I sighed as I sat down, and shot my friend a helpless expression. "I already told you, Rowanstar didn't give me much of a choice. He used the whole 'former mentor' excuse on me! How am I supposed to say no to that?"

"Are you sure it's worth it though?" Scorchfur pressed. "Crowfrost, I know you feel like you owe Rowanstar, but there's no way this arrangement can work out. Dawnpelt hates you almost more than you hate her! Even if you would be willing to give it a shot, who says she'll feel the same way?"

A frown played lightly across my lips. "Because of Hailpaw. Rowanstar told me that Dawnpelt wanted to mentor one of the kits, and I saw her playing with them yesterday. It looked like she really was close to them. Even if she wishes I would just drop dead, she likes Hailpaw."

Scorchfur studied me for a couple seconds before shrugging. "Alright, if you say so. She just padded out of the Warriors' Den." My head shot up and I spun around just in time to see that Scorchfur was right; there she was.

All of a sudden I was filled with the urge to walk in the opposite direction of the she-cat, maybe shove her when we passed each other. _StarClan, I can't even look at her without feeling angry!_ She just had that effect on me.

But, I digress. I told Rowanstar I would try to get along with his precious daughter, and I wasn't going to go back on my word. So, plastering on a smirk that would have made any she-cat pass out (and maybe even Ferretclaw), I strolled confidently over to the beautiful, creamy-colored she-cat.

"Hey Dawnpelt," I said smoothly.

Dawnpelt's head shot up and she looked at me as if I had just murdered a kit. "What do you want?" She growled.

The smirk fell right off my features, and replacing it was a rather frustrated expression. "Alright, it's clear that you can't act civil towards me, so I'll just get to the point: will you help me train Hailpaw?"

Great StarClan that hurt my pride a lot more than I thought it would!

"No."

"Good, tomorrow I'm showing him the territory. You can just- wait, _what did you just say_?"

Anger shone clearly in Dawnpelt's hazel eyes. "I said no."

Well. That was the last thing I expected to hear. And even though I should have been praising StarClan the she rejected my offer, I couldn't help but feel… furious.

 _Who does she think she is?!_ Was Dawnpelt really so stuck-up that she thought she was too good to train Hailpaw with me? Or was she too selfish to help someone and not gain anything in return? Or maybe just too stubborn to accept my gracious offer. "You know you have a lot of nerve rejecting my offer," I growled lowly.

Dawnpelt shot me a mockingly sweet smile. "Are you sure you're not just upset that I rejected _you_?"

At that very moment, I hated Dawnpelt more than I hated Ferretclaw.

"What's your problem?!" I snapped.

Dawnpelt narrowed her chestnut-colored eyes. "Do you think I'm an idiot?" She challenged. "Crowfrost, you would _never_ ask me for help, so you're either doing this as a prank, or out of pity. And I'm not so desperate that I would accept anyone's pity."

 _Pity?_ "I'm not doing this out of pity!" I protested. "I'm doing it out of obligation!" Surprise flickered in Dawnpelt's eyes, and if I wasn't so frustrated I might have been amused. "Your _daddy_ asked me if I would let you help me train Hailpaw."

A series of emotions darted across Dawnpelt's features, from surprise to realization, from realization to fury. "He asked you to… _ugh_! Why can't he just leave me alone?! Why can't _you_ just leave me alone?!"

"Me?" I protested. "I only asked because Rowanstar wanted me to! Trust me, I never would have bothered you otherwise!" I snapped. Dawnpelt looked at me like I was crowfood (in her eyes I probably was), before growling in frustration and spinning around on her paws, and darting out of camp. "Yeah, I had fun talking to you too!" I shouted after her, more than a little irritated.

"Well that went well," Scorchfur remarked as he came to stand beside me.

I exhaled loudly. "I can't believe she actually said no! And then had the nerve to ask if I was upset that she rejected me! Ugh! I can't _stand her_!"

"Maybe it's for the best that she said no," the dark gray tom said. "You two working together would have been chaos."

I scowled lightly. "Yeah, I know." I muttered. But deep down inside, I still couldn't help but feel enraged that she said no. Maybe it was because she had rejected _me_ , or... maybe it was because _she_ had rejected me.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

"Ugh!" I growled. "He is just so arrogant!"

Olivenose, my best friend, sighed dreamily. "But he's _so_ handsome!"

"And he had _the nerve_ to pad up to me, smirking like he had just won my heart!"

"I wish he would smirk at me like that."

"Olivenose," I snapped. "Are you even listening to me? Olivenose!"

The green-eyed she-cat snapped to attention and shot me a frustrated look. "Well I am now."

I rolled my chestnut-orbs and stopped walking. "If you only came with me to ramble on about how much you love Crowfrost again, then just go back to camp Olivenose, because I'm not in the mood!"

Anyone else might have flattened their ears or shrank back, but fortunately, it took a lot more than just a snippy comment to hurt Olivenose's feelings. She wasn't easily deterred, she had a thick skin, and was sassy enough to hang with the best of them. Despite the countless arguments we'd had (which were mostly about Crowfrost, considering I hoped he went to the Dark Forest when he died, and she thought he was a StarClan warrior), there was no one else I wanted as my best friend.

Even if I did want to claw her eyes out sometimes. Like right now, for example.

Olivenose snorted. "You're one to talk. All you ever do is rant about how much you hate Crowfrost!"

"I didn't ask you to follow me out here!" I hissed. "You saw what happened, you knew exactly what I would rant about!"

"Oh Dawnpelt," Olivenose sighed with mock pity. "When will you realize that I'll _always_ follow you? You're stuck with me." I huffed when she pressed her pelt against mine, but I didn't pull away from the comforting feeling.

"Lucky me," I muttered. But when I lifted my hazel gaze to meet her bright green gaze, I was forced to smile. _I really am lucky to have such a great best friend._ Even if Crowfrost _was_ her idol.

Olivenose returned my smile and sat down on the grassy soil, and I did the same. "Go ahead," she meowed. "Rant on about Crowfrost to your heart's content. I'll listen this time."

I hesitated for a heartbeat before giving into temptation; I had some pent up frustration I needed to get out. "I can't **stand him**!" I exploded. "He thinks he's so perfect, and it wouldn't be so bad but he never misses the chance to rub his accomplishments in someone's face, be it at camp or at a Gathering. He prances around like he's StarClan's gift to the world, and we should all just overthrow Rowanstar and make him leader instead. And his smirk-!"

Olivenose sighed dreamily. "His smirk…"

"I don't know how it's possible for one cat to have so many different smirks!" I fumed. "He has a smirk for every situation! I mean, did he just study his reflection in a puddle until he mastered control over his facial expressions?!"

"And again, I could tolerate even that, but the way cats treat him _infuriates_ me! He wouldn't be nearly so cocky if she-cats didn't throw themselves at him, just begging him to look their way!"

Olivenose shrugged, as if it wasn't her fault that she was so infatuated with the black-and-white tom.

"But what's even worse than that," I started bitterly. "Is how _he_ treats the she-cats who throw themselves at him. Sure, it's pretty shallow to throw yourself at a tom just so that he'll look your way-"

"Thanks," Olivenose commented dryly. "Really feeling the love over here."

"But the way that he treats them in return is absolutely disgusting." I finished, wrinkling my nose. "He flirts with them, charms them, makes them feel like they're the only she-cat in the world, and as soon as he gets what he wants from them, he dumps them like they're crowfood!"

Olivenose raised an eyebrow, seemingly unimpressed with my rant. "Do you speak from personal experience?"

I wasn't meant to take the question seriously, maybe snort and roll my eyes, but I looked sharply at her anyways. "Depends; do you count yourself and Ivytail as "personal experience"? Because if so, then yes." I was never one of Crowfrost's victims, but my best friend and my former mentor were. Even though I'd never been in a "relationship" with the devious black-and-white tom, I watched the two she-cats who I was closest to (excluding my mother) go through the grief that Crowfrost forced upon not only them, but countless others as well.

"I don't have any regrets," Olivenose said with a shrug, but I wasn't fooled for a second. I saw the brief flash of pain in her vibrant green eyes; I was the one she cried on when Crowfrost broke her heart. And yet, for some reason, she still idolized him.

"Clearly," I mumbled under my breath. A light frown dusted my features and I shook my head. "I just don't understand it. How can you, no, wait, how can _any she-cat_ still want to be in a relationship with him even though you know what he's done to other she-cats? It's not like it's a secret that he uses she-cats; he brags about it to everyone!"

Olivenose smiled sadly. "You already said it: he makes you feel like the only she-cat in the world. He whispers sweet nothings in your ear, makes you laugh, twines your tails, and looks at you with those eyes…" The tortoiseshell she-cat gave her head a quick shake. "Besides, you would have to be blind to not find him handsome. What with his black-as-night pelt and his white chest and paws, and that strong build. And have you _seen_ the way he walks? It's like he's taunting everyone, daring them to challenge him. Who wouldn't want to be with a tom that confidant?"

"Arrogant is more like it," I said dryly.

"And he has those eyes," Olivenose said, echoing her earlier statement. "Oh, _those eyes._ They're the exact same shade as frost, and they're so clear and so _blue._ And when he looks at you with them, they get this certain kind of gleam in them, and you just can't help but fall victim to him, and you'll want to give him the moon and the stars, you'll want to give him _anything_ to keep that gleam in his eyes. I know it sounds ridiculous but I-I just can't describe the feeling you get. It's like he hypnotizes you…" she ended her fanciful explanation with a long, dreamy purr, and a faraway look in her eyes.

I stared at her as if she had a disease.

 _His… eyes?_ I thought to myself, absolutely bewildered. _They're just eyes. There's nothing that grand about them, other than the fact that they_ are _an interesting shade of blue. They're very light, but not quite sky blue. I guess frosty-blue really would be the best way to describe them, but- Oh my StarClan now she has_ me _thinking about them! Ugh! I'm surrounded by madness!_

There was only one logical excuse for Olivenose's fascination with Crowfrost and his eyes.

"You're delusional."

 **Dawn Frost**

"You know, I don't remember a time when Crowfrost ever asked for _anyone's_ help with _anything_."

"That's because his ego is larger than the silverpelt and he's arrogant," I said simply, not really paying Olivenose any mind as I examined a catch I had just made – a blue-tailed lizard. I swiped my tongue over my jaws longingly. Blue-tailed lizards were my absolute favorites!

"He asked you for help mentoring Hailpaw."

I stopped.

 _That's… that right. Now that I think about it, that's the first time I've known him to ever ask someone for help._ A frown played across my lips, until realization dawned on me. "Rowanstar asked him to," I said. "I guess Crowfrost owed him for something and he complied. Besides, he was probably praying to StarClan that I refused his offer." _If he prays to anyone but himself, that is._

"But don't you find it the least bit strange?" Olivenose pressed. "Just a little bit?"

I shrugged. "No, not really." I glanced at her over my shoulder. "Don't tell me that you do."

"I guess I'm more shocked than anything else," Olivenose said slowly, as if she was carefully choosing her words. "I mean, you two hate each other. And yet… he asked _you_. Even if Rowanstar did put him up to it, why would he ask Crowfrost of all cats? Why not Owlclaw? Heck, Ivytail was your mentor! Why not her?"

I sighed as I finally stood up, my blue-tailed lizard hanging from my jaws. "Because he promised me that when the time came, I could mentor Hailpaw. Not Honeypaw, and not Cloverpaw. He specifically promised me Hailpaw."

A look of remembrance flashed across Olivenose's features. "Oh, that's right. And then he told you yesterday that he changed his mind?"

I nodded, bitterness creasing my features. "He never gave me a reason, just told me that Crowfrost would be mentoring Hailpaw instead. And then Crowfrost told me that it was because Rowanstar thought I wasn't ready to take on an apprentice," I ended the sentence with a sneer. "I don't understand it, Olivenose! He thought _Tigerheart_ was ready for an apprentice, but not me? If anything, I'm moons more mature than both Tigerheart and Crowfrost combined!"

"Maybe it doesn't have anything to do with maturity," Olivenose suggested. "Maybe he's waiting for something else to happen?"

"Like what?" I asked doubtfully.

"Maybe he's waiting for you to gain a mate."

I shot my grinning friend a sharp look. "Stop it." Olivenose pestered me nonstop about when I would finally give a tom a chance and take a mate, no matter how many times I delivered the same response: "When I find the right tom _". It's not my fault all the good toms in ShadowClan already had a love interest!_

"No, I'm being serious," Olivenose said with her grin still intact, looking the complete opposite of serious. "What if he's waiting for you to take a mate and soften up a little? It's not a secret that you have the tendency to act quite coldly, and you can't stand immaturity. What if he thinks you'll be too harsh on an apprentice?"

"Because that isn't logical," I said with a roll of my hazel eyes. "If he promised me an apprentice before the kits were even three moons old, he obviously must have thought I was mature enough to handle the responsibility then, and trusted me to be gentle with Hailpaw." I frowned lightly. "Besides, you saw how much time I spent with those kits; they love me. I would never treat them coldly. I only do that to mindless toms."

The tortoiseshell she-cat shrugged in a submissive manner. "Fine, you win. I have no idea why Rowanstar changed his mind. But I do know that the sun is setting and moon-high will roll around soon, and the clan is probably wondering why we're not back at camp yet."

I blinked and glanced at the sky, and saw that Olivenose was right; the sun was setting at a rapid pace. "Alright, come on." I meowed, tightening my hold on the lizard that still hung from my jaws. "Let's go."

 **Dawn Frost**

When we reached the camp entrance Waspstripe was already there, back straight and amber eyes bright.

"Sitting your silent vigil?" Olivenose asked the ginger-and-brown tom. Waspstripe dipped his head in response, the ghost of a grin on his lips. I smiled a bit as I thought about mine and Tigerheart's customary vigil. _It feels like it was just yesterday…_

"Good luck," I told the young warrior before trotting into camp. Olivenose, who hadn't hunted, told me she would see me in the Warriors' Den. I flicked my tail in acknowledgement as I continued on my way to the fresh-kill pile, where I dropped my blue-tailed lizard. I was tempted to pick it back up and have a quick snack before I turned in for the night, before ultimately deciding against it. I wasn't very hungry anyway.

But I also wasn't ready to surrender to sleep just yet, so I padded a little ways off and started grooming my creamy-colored pelt, all while keeping a close eye on the activities going on around me.

The sun-down border patrol had just strolled into camp, with Tawnypelt in the lead, her apprentice Ashpaw at her shoulder, and Starlingwing and Applefur trailing behind them closely. Their stride was relax and they talked easily so I assumed that ThunderClan and RiverClan were keeping to themselves.

Kinkfur and Shrewfoot were soaking up the last rays of sunlight just outside the Elders' Den, looking content to lay there the rest of their lives. I smiled at the pair of friends fondly before letting my chestnut-colored eyes drift once more.

Ratscar and Pinenose were trotting happily out of camp with their tails twined, presumably for a late-night outing since their kits were now apprentices. Not that was worth batting an eye over; ShadowClan cats were known to be night-owls, often hunting under the cloak of darkness, or having training sessions with apprentices. I briefly wondered when Crowfrost would take Hailpaw out for his first training session in the dark, before I caught my thought process and frowned lightly. _There's no reason to think about that,_ I scolded myself.

And speaking of ShadowClan's "prized deputy", he looked to be in a yet another forceful conversation with Ferretclaw, whilst Scorchfur watched from the sidelines, amusement written across his features.

I snorted softly but didn't look away from the toms, instead choosing to enjoy the show. Crowfrost looked as if he was trying to explain something to Ferretclaw but wasn't making much progress, and Ferretclaw looked at Crowfrost with all the awe of a StarClan warrior. I screwed up my features. _Great StarClan, not only are she-cats infatuated by Crowfrost, but Ferretclaw too?_ I was surrounded by madness.

And then Crowfrost looked off to the side in frusteration, and our eyes met.

His pale blue gaze brightened when it landed on me, and his mind was probably swirling with insults he could use on me, and scenarios where I would make a fool out of myself. Normally I would scoff and look away but tonight, I held his gaze evenly, studying it. After a few tense moments I stood to my paws and padded towards the Warriors' Den.

I had looked directly into his eyes and not felt a thing. His eyes were an interesting shade of blue and that was all.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

I blinked when Dawnpelt didn't immediately break out eye contact, instead choosing to hold my gaze firmly, almost as if she were concentrating on it. I was even more confused when she stood abruptly to her paws and disappeared into the Warriors' Den, not once glancing back at me. _Wha-?_

"What was that about?" Scorchfur asked me softly, to which I shrugged. As if I knew what went on in that she-cat's mind. "She looked like she was trying to dissect you."

"Actually-" I groaned aloud when Ferretclaw decided to voice his opinion. "To me, it looked like she was admiring Crowfrost's eyes."

"And why, pray tell, would she do that, Ferretclaw?" I muttered irritably.

Ferretclaw tilted his head to the side and looked at me as if the answer were simple. "Because you have very nice eyes," he replied pleasantly.

Scorchfur chuckled. Ferretclaw smiled.

And I was ready to kill a cat.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **How do we feel about Ferretclaw?**

 **#Ferretclaw is bae.**

* * *

 **This was a really fun chapter to write! We got our first Dawnpelt POV, and we'll continue to see more from her as the story progresses. I think the majority of the story will remain in Crowfrost's POV, if only because he needs more character development than Dawnpelt does, but she should have one at least every other chapter. She's a lot of fun to write for; so sassy and opinionated. Plus it's always nice to have a break from Crowfrost constantly gushing over himself, as much as we love him :3**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**

* * *

 **Allegiances**

 **ShadowClan**

 **Leader:** Rowanstar - ginger tabby tom with amber eyes

 **Deputy:** Crowfrost – handsome black-and-white tom with light blue eyes **(Apprentice: Hailpaw)**

 **Medicine Cat:** Littlecloud - very small tabby tom with blue eyes

 **Warriors:** Tawnypelt - tortoiseshell she-cat with green eyes **(Apprentice: Shadepaw)**

Ivytail - black, white, and tortoiseshell she-cat with green eyes **(Apprentice: Honeypaw)**

Ratscar - brown tom with long scar across his back with dark blue eyes

Applefur – mottled brown she-cat with green eyes

Scorchfur - dark gray tom with bright amber eyes

Owlclaw - light brown tabby tom with green eyes **(Apprentice: Cloverpaw)**

Pinenose - black she-cat with amber eyes

Tigerheart - dark brown tabby tom with amber eyes

Dawnpelt – pretty creamy colored she-cat with hazel eyes

Starlingwing – Ginger tom with bright amber eyes

Olivenose - tortoiseshell she-cat with bright green eyes

Ferretclaw – cream-and-gray tom with light blue eyes

Stoatfur - tortoiseshell and white she-cat with brown eyes

Grassheart - pale brown tabby she-cat with pale green eyes

Spikefur - dark brown tom with amber eyes

Waspstripe – ginger and brown tom with amber eyes

 **Apprentices:** Ashpaw – Sleek, dark gray she-cat with blue eyes

Hailpaw – light gray tabby tom with dark blue eyes

Honeypaw – golden tabby she-cat with light blue eyes

Cloverpaw – dark gray she-cat with one black paw and green eyes

 **Queens:** Snowbird - pure white she-cat with green eyes (Expecting Scorchfur's kits)

 **Elders:** Oakfur - small brown tom with brown eyes

Kinkfur - tabby she-cat, with long fur that sticks out at all angles and brown eyes

Shrewfoot – gray she-cat with black paws and blue eyes

Smokefoot - black tom with blue eyes; retired young due to injuries

 **ThunderClan**

 **Leader:** Bramblestar – Dark brown tabby tom with amber eyes

 **Deputy:** Brackenfur – Golden brown tabby tom **(Apprentice: Seedpaw)** _(Stand in for Squirrelflight while she's expecting)_

 **Medicine Cat:** Leafpool – Light brown tabby she-cat with amber eyes **(Apprentice: Jayfeather)**

 **Warriors:** Cloudtail – Long haired white tom with blue eyes

Brightheart – White she-cat with ginger patches

Spiderleg – Long-limbed black tom with brown underbelly and amber eyes **(Apprentice: Dewpaw)**

Thornclaw – Golden brown tabby tom

Whitewing – White she-cat with green eyes

Birchfall – Light brown tabby tom

Berrynose – Cream colored tom

Mousewhisker – Gray and white tom **(Apprentice: Amberpaw)**

Hazeltail – Gray and white she-cat

Lionblaze – Golden tabby tom with amber eyes

Poppyfrost – Tortoiseshell she-cat

Foxleap – Reddish tabby tom

Icecloud – White she-cat with blue eyes **(Apprentice: Snowpaw)**

Toadstep – Black and white tom

Rosepetal – Dark cream she-cat

Bumblestripe – Very pale gray tom with black stripes

Blossomfall – Tortoiseshell and white she-cat **(Apprentice: Lilypaw)**

Briarlight – Dark brown she-cat

Dovewing – Pale gray she-cat with blue eyes

Molestripe – Brown and cream tom with green eyes

Cherryleaf – Ginger she-cat with amber eyes

 **Apprentices:** Jayfeather – Gray tabby tom with blind blue eyes

Seedpaw – Very pale ginger she-cat with green eyes

Lilypaw – Dark tabby she-cat with white patches with dark blue eyes

Snowpaw – Snowy white tom

Amberpaw – Gray and white she-cat

Dewpaw – Light gray tom

 **Queens:** Daisy – Cream long-furred she-cat

Cinderheart – Gray tabby she-cat (Mother to Lionblaze's kits: Palekit – light gray she-kit; Stonekit – gray tabby tom)

Squirrelflight – Dark ginger she-cat with green eyes (expecting Bramblestar's kits)

Ivypool – Silver-and-white tabby she-cat with dark blue eyes (Expecting Mousewhisker's kits)

 **Elders:** Purdy – Plump tabby former loner

Sandstorm – Pale ginger she-cat with green eyes

Graystripe – Long-haired gray tom

 **RiverClan**

 **Leader:** Mistystar - gray she-cat with blue eyes

 **Deputy:** Reedwhisker - black tom

 **Medicine Cat:** Mothwing - dappled golden she-cat **(Apprentice: Willowshine)**

 **Warriors:** Graymist - pale gray tabby she-cat

Duskfur - brown tabby she-cat

Minnowtail - dark gray she-cat **(Apprentice: Hawkpaw)**

Pebblefoot - mottled gray tom

Mallownose - light brown tabby tom

Robinwing - tortoiseshell-and-white tom

Grasspelt - light brown tom

Hollowflight - dark brown tabby tom

Troutstream - pale gray tabby she-cat

Mossyfoot - gray and brown tom

Rushtail - light brown she-cat **(Apprentice: Flowerpaw)**

Shimmerpelt - silver she-cat

Lakeheart - gray tabby she-cat

Heronwing - gray and black tom

 **Apprentices:** Willowshine – gray tabby she-cat

Hawkpaw – dark brown tabby tom

Flowerpaw – Gray-and-black she-cat

 **Queens:** Petalfur - gray-and-white she-cat (expecting Mallownose's kits)

 **Elders:** Mintfur - light gray tabby tom

Icewing - white she-cat with blue eyes

Mosspelt - tortoiseshell she-cat with blue eyes

 **WindClan**

 **Leader:** Onestar - brown tabby tom

 **Deputy:** Harespring - brown-and-white tom **(Apprentice: Oakpaw)**

 **Medicine Cat** : Kestrelflight - mottled gray tom

 **Warriors:** Weaselfur - ginger tom with white paws

Crowfeather - dark gray tom

Nightcloud - black she-cat

Gorsetail - very pale gray-and-white tom with blue eyes

Leaftail - dark tabby tom with amber eyes

Emberfoot - gray tom with two dark paws **(Apprentice: Larkpaw)**

Heathertail - light brown tabby she-cat with blue eyes

Breezepelt - black tom with amber eyes

Swallowtail - dark gray she-cat **(Apprentice: Greenpaw)**

Furzepelt - gray and white she-cat

 **Apprentices:** Larkpaw – black she-cat

Greenpaw – ginger she-cat

Oakpaw – light brown tabby tom

 **Queens:** Sedgewhisker - light brown tabby she-cat (expecting Emberfoot's kits)

 **Elders:** Whitetail - small white she-cat


	3. You Should Leave Swimming To RiverClan

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did then Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

* * *

 **Chapter Three - Leave Swimming to RiverClan**

* * *

 **"Many people love in themselves what they hate in others." E. F. Schumacher**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

"You're stalling."

"I _am not_ stalling."

I was totally stalling.

Smokefoot snorted in disbelief. Scorchfur rolled his eyes. My friends are jerks.

"Then why haven't you taken out Hailpaw yet?" Scorchfur asked in a knowing tone, informing me that he knew exactly why I hadn't taken my new apprentice out. "You said you would show him the territory today, and Owlclaw is waiting on you with Cloverpaw."

"You better not make my apprentice wait much longer," Smokefoot added in a warning tone.

"Firstly he isn't your apprentice anymore. Secondly I haven't taken him out yet because I'm attending to important deputy duties." I stuck my muzzle in the air and sniffed in a snobby manner.

Scorchfur scowled. "Crowfrost, you are literally sitting in the middle of camp talking to us. What deputy duty could that apply to?"

"The one where I make sure my clanmates are satisfied, of course!" I exclaimed. "It's very important for a deputy to have strong relationships with each of their clanmates, you know."

Smokefoot made an incredulous-sounding noise in the back of his throat, almost as if he was chocking. "And this is coming from the deputy who can't stand half of his clanmates?!" he demanded.

I shrugged, although my frosty-blue orbs gleamed mischievously. "I said strong relationships, I never said anything about friendships." And I definitely hated a few certain cats strongly enough.

Before either of my unsupportive, over-criticizing friends could say anything, the dawn hunting patrol returned to camp, all carrying prey except Starlingwing, who looked quite downcast. I was tempted to call out to Starlingwing and inquire of his forlorn expression, but hesitated. Starlingwing was a rather special case.

The ginger tom had trained in the Dark Forest but fought for the Clans' when the time came. Normally this wouldn't change a thing and I would continue to loath him, but Starlingwing had been on Smokefoot's patrol when they were ambushed, and had carried him on his back the rest of the way to camp, despite harboring several injuries that he had received when fighting alongside his clanmates. He passed out from sheer exhaustion when he finally reached ShadowClan, and his wounds had become so fatal from the pressure of carrying Smokefoot that Littlecloud actually thought that he would never walk properly again. But StarClan had taken pity on Starlingwing and within no time, he was back on his paws, trying to earn his clan's trust back.

If he had carried any other cat back I might not have cared, but… it was Smokefoot. And I couldn't help but feel like Starlingwing didn't deserve my silent wrath. Besides, he had always seemed like genuinely good cat. But then again, so had Applefur and Pinenose, among countless others.

"Hey Starlingwing," I called out, finally giving into temptation. "Why such the long face?"

Waspstripe, who had also been on the hunting patrol and caught two small lizards, smirked and nudged the ginger warrior. "He's moping around because he let the biggest rabbit alive get away."

Scorchfur's eyes widened. "A rabbit in ShadowClan?"

Smokefoot snorted. "Yeah right. ShadowClan doesn't even share a border with WindClan!"

But Starlingwing stubbornly shook his head. "I know what I saw. It was a rabbit, and it was gigantic!" Starlingwing's insistence had gathered quite the crowd, and most of our present clanmates had padded over to see what was going on. I frowned lightly in thought.

"If it is a rabbit," I started thoughtfully. "Wouldn't it be slower than usual, because its paws would sink into the marshes and slow it down?"

"You'd think so," Starlingwing replied bitterly. "But I doubt that thing's paws touched the ground, it moved so quickly! I don't know how WindClan can chase them all day long!"

"Because WindClan have nothing but time on their paws, that bunch of lazy dormouse's." Tigerheart said good-naturedly.

"I still don't think it was a rabbit," Smokefoot said with a shrug. "It was probably just a really large toad. Starlingwing's been known to over-exaggerate in the past."

"Hey!"

"I saw it too though," Waspstripe protested. "I darted right past me!" All at once everyone started adding in their own two cents, tossing around teasing remarks and thoughtful comments. And all the while a wicked grin started to play across my lips, as I developed a plan.

"Alright, settle down everyone," I said loudly, quickly gaining my clanmates' attention. "Now, I'm not saying I believe Starlingwing and Waspstripe's story; they're both young and could very well be making it up in an effort to impress a couple she-cats."

Starlingwing rolled his amber eyes and Waspstripe growled loudly, although I didn't miss the rosy blush that dusted his features.

"However," I continued. "If there is indeed a rabbit in ShadowClan territory, and it really is as large as they say, then making such a catch would certainly deserve reward."

All at once, every single pair of ears perked up in interest. I paused and allowed myself a tiny smirk. _I have them eating out of my paws._

"And what reward could possibly be so fitting?" I asked innocently. "What's say… the winner would be excluded from all dawn patrols for the next moon." Shocked gasps arose from the crowd of cats and excited chatter started up once again. I was notorious for sending cats, especially those who loved to sleep in, on dawn patrols simply because I knew that very few cats actually enjoyed them, and those that did I rarely selected. To know that you could sleep in to your heart's content was definitely a fair reward.

Almost as soon as I finished speaking, my clanmates scattered. Some headed towards their respective dens, others left the camp, presumably to search for the rabbit in question. My whiskers twitched in amusement.

"Wow." Smokefoot said, shaking his head. "Just wow." I blinked and looked around, but didn't spot anything particularly interesting.

"What?" I asked.

"You," Scorchfur started dryly. "Are incredibly dedicated to stalling. So dedicated in fact that you created a competition to catch a rabbit that might not even exist!"

I felt my hackles start to rise as I was accused. "I am not stalling!" I snarled. "I'm boosting clan morel!"

"Our morel is _fine_ , Crowfrost." Came Scorchfur's exasperated reply. "We just made a new warrior and three new apprentices yesterday, and the Gathering is tonight. Right now the only thing you should be concerned about is _that_ apprentice over _there_ ," the dark gray tom finished his statement with a flourish of his tail in Hailpaw's direction.

I narrowed my eyes as they fell on Hailpaw, who was sitting beside Owlclaw and Cloverpaw. Cloverpaw was chattering away and Hailpaw seemed interested in what she was saying, nodding and commenting when he felt the need. He definitely looked more up-beat than he had at his Apprentice Ceremony the other day. Perhaps he had just been nervous – receiving the deputy as your mentor was a big deal, and meant that more was expected out of you. _I'll definitely let him know what's expected of him._

"Fine," I spat, finally giving in. I didn't wait for Scorchfur or Smokefoot to say anything else and stood to my paws, and made my way over to Hailpaw.

The light gray tabby tom looked up when he sensed me approaching him, and I noticed that easy-going stance became more rigged. The laughter died from his eyes, prompting me to frown in confusion. _Wha-? I haven't said two words to him!_

"Ready to leave?" Owlclaw asked, shaking me out of my confused daze.

"Yeah," I replied coolly. "Come on, we're burning daylight."

 **Dawn Frost**

 _Maybe he just has a naturally distant personality?_ I thought as I glanced at Hailpaw, who had yet to utter a single phrase since departing from camp. _Yeah, that must be it. And he was only easy-going earlier because he was with Cloverpaw, who he's comfortable with. That's a logical explanation, right?_

I was tempted to go with the excuse if only to cease the nagging voice in my head that said it wasn't normal behavior for an apprentice to appear so detached. And really, it _was_ a logical explanation, I just had a feeling it wasn't the _correct_ explanation. Especially since I'd seen him interact with other cats – his family, Dawnpelt, and a few other warriors – and aside from acting a bit aloof he seemed fine. He definitely didn't act this distinct.

Inwardly I sighed, but outwardly I kept up the good mentor façade. I gestured to important landmarks that would help the future warriors identify their location, I explained the history behind a few locations, and I paused so that Owlclaw and Ivytail could add in their thoughts. All things considered I thought I was doing an excellent job.

"Are you okay?" Owlclaw whispered in my ear, as Ivytail showed the apprentices how to mark a pine tree to help them find their way back to camp. I blinked in surprise and looked curiously at Owlclaw.

"Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?"

Owlclaw shrugged. "Just thought I'd ask. You're acting kinda off."

Oh. Well then I guess I wasn't doing that great of a job.

"I'm fine Owlclaw," I said, forcing a bit of cheer into my voice. "Better than fine actually. I half-expected Ferretclaw to jump out of the bushes when we were leaving and demand to come along." Owlclaw purred with amusement and I felt a certain fondness bubble in my chest. _It seems like just yesterday he and Olivenose were scampering through the pine needles and begging me and Smokefoot to take them out for battle training._

Figures the next time I get assigned to mentor an apprentice he isn't anything like Olivenose. It was like I traded preppy and peppy for cold and aloof.

"Have you ever gotten lost in the forest?" Honeypaw asked her mentor. Ivytail's features screwed up in distaste.

"Of course not! Only a complete lizard-brain could get lost in their own territory!"

The light died a little in Honeypaw's eyes and she swallowed thickly, clearly feeling the pressure to memorize her territory as quickly as possible. Owlclaw must have noticed Honeypaw's reaction as well, because he stepped in and said, "That doesn't mean we don't expect you to make a couple of mistake the first few times we take you out. Making mistakes is how you learn. If everyone was as perfect as Ivytail," he gestured to Ivytail with his tail. "Then no one would ever learn anything."

Ivytail looked offended. "I learned plenty as an apprentice."

"So then you made plenty of mistakes?" I asked innocently. Ivytail shot me a cold look as she was forced to follow her pride and admit she wasn't _born perfect_ , and I purred softly. Now that I thought about it, it was really quite amazing that Ivytail and I had ever been mates. She was so strict and expected you to meet every single one of her standards, whilst I was more reckless and daring, and more all over the place in general. _It isn't hard to believe that she used to be Dawnpelt's mentor,_ I mused to myself.

"Come on," I said, gesturing with my tail for the patrol to follow me. "It's time we start heading back to camp. I still have to help Rowanstar select the cats attending the Gathering tonight."

"Will we be selected?" Cloverpaw asked excitedly, fulfilling the space to my right. I had to force myself to keep a level expression and shrugged non-committedly.

"It depends."

"On what?" Cloverpaw inquired.

"On whether or not Rowanstar feels you deserve to attend," I explained, praying that Owlclaw would call his curious apprentice back.

Cloverpaw tilted her head to the side. "Can't you put in a good word for us? You were with us all day, after all. You can tell Rowanstar how great we were!" The dark gray she-cat's green eyes were bright with pride, clearly proud that she'd thought of the idea.

"Cloverpaw!" Owlclaw scolded his apprentice. "Don't be rude. Rowanstar probably already has the list prepared anyways." Cloverpaw flattened her ears against her head, disappointed and embarrassed, and I felt an unexpected twinge of sympathy towards the she-cat. She wasn't trying to be rude or annoying. She was just young and didn't know better.

As the camp entrance came into view I leaned down and whispered in her, "I'll talk to Rowanstar about letting you come tonight." Cloverpaw blinked graciously at me and scampered into the camp, no doubt eager to tell her parents about her first venture out into the daunting new world. Owlclaw flicked me with his tail when he passed, silently letting me know that he saw and appreciated the exchange.

I immediately made my way towards Rowanstar's den and found him grooming his ginger pelt. "Getting ready to tonight?" I asked, making my presence known. Rowanstar glanced up at me and smiled briefly.

"How did it go?" he asked.

I shrugged as I made myself comfortable. "Fine, as I expected." As an afterthought I added, "Cloverpaw and Honeypaw seem to like their mentors, and vice versa."

"And you and Hailpaw?" Rowanstar pressed.

I hesitated before replying, "Hailpaw's more reserved than his sisters, so I think it'll take a little more time for him to warm up to me. But he seems like a good cat."

My response seemed to satisfy Rowanstar, who nodded and said, "Good. Now, I assume you're here to discuss the Gathering patrol?" I nodded. "I actually just finished planning it. Tawnypelt, Ivytail, Applefur, Scorchfur, Owlclaw, Dawnpelt, Grassheart, Waspstripe, Ashpaw, and Honeypaw."

"Cloverpaw really wanted to go," I meowed.

The dark ginger tom shrugged. "Every cat really wants to go. I can only bring so many cats until the patrol looks like a threat."

"Then switch Ashpaw with Cloverpaw," I said, thinking quickly. "Ashpaw went last moon anyway, and I think she and Hailpaw are friends. I'm sure he'd rather stay with her than stay with his sister."

Rowanstar was silent for a heart-beat and I wondered if I'd worded my suggestion too much like a demand. Rowanstar was fair, but he was also young and struggled with his pride. He didn't take kindly to demands. But after a couple of long seconds had passed he nodded. "Very well. Cloverpaw can attend tonight." he licked a paw and dragged it over his ear. "Go and eat something before we leave, Crowfrost. You have until dusk."

I dipped my head respectfully before I turned around, and made my way towards the fresh-kill pile. On my way I noticed Cloverpaw talking to Shadepaw, and when she caught my eye and pricked her ears I smiled briefly and nodded. Excitement lit her bright green eyes and she grinned in return, before resuming her conversation with Shadepaw. I felt anther unexpected twinge course through me, but unlike last time it was with satisfaction. Cloverpaw was just so easy to please, and she for a moment she'd gazed at me as if I were her hero. It was a nice feeling.

"How'd the tour go?" A voice asked, and I glanced away from the young she-cat to look at Scorchfur.

"It went fine," I replied. "I am a brilliant tour guide."

Scorchfur rolled his amber eyes. "Of course you are. Just like you're a brilliant everything else."

I pretended to look thoughtful. "Hm. Warrior, deputy, ally, friend. Why, I believe you might be onto something, Scorchfur!" My friend cuffed me over the ear and I chuckled. "By the way, you're going to the Gathering tonight. You're welcome."

Scorchfur snorted. "You act like it's _your decision_."

"Well I didn't try to talk him out of it," I protested. "I could have said something like, 'Oh, no, don't invite Scorchfur, he's no fun at all!'"

Scorchfur rolled his eyes. "We have two very different concepts of 'fun'."

"But there's only one true concept, which means one of us is wrong," I retorted, and then continued to scan the fresh-kill pile. "And this argument will end much faster if you just go ahead and admit it's you, so you might as well give in and help me eat this frog."

Scorchfur sighed but the smile that played across his lips proved that he found my antics amusing. "You always did have a creative way of winning arguments." he said, before he leaned down to help me eat the frog.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

"Dawnpelt, Dawnpelt!" I raised my head and smiled when I saw Hailpaw scampering towards me.

"Hey you," I purred. "I take it the tour went well? Usually you _never_ get excited over _anything_ ," I teased the young tom.

Hailpaw huffed as he came to a stop in front of me. "That's not true," he protested. "I've gotten excited before." Light filled his dark blue eyes. "But yes, the tour went well. I knew ShadowClan's territory was large, but I never knew it was _this_ large!"

Fondness for the light gray tom bubbled deep in my chest. Out of the three Hailpaw was the most cautious, and didn't trust others as easily as his sisters. He was very proud of his ability to keep a cool-head. Cloverpaw, the second kit to be born, was the enthusiastic one, who could find an adventure in literally anything. She was eager to please and in return, was easy to please. Lastly was Honeypaw, who, like her name implied, was a sweetheart. She was the most curious one out of the three which often got her into trouble, but her sweet nature made it hard for anyone to stay angry at her for long.

 _I can't believe they're apprentices now,_ I thought, bittersweet. _It seems like yesterday they were still tottering around camp, and it was still a challenge to keep their balance._ Until the litter had been born I was convinced that I didn't want a family of my own; I was perfectly content with the life of a warrior. But now… maybe being a mother wasn't such a terrible idea. If I could ever find the right tom, that is.

Hailpaw told me about his tour and how Honeypaw almost fell headfirst into a stream, and how Cloverpaw wouldn't stop asking questions. When he mentioned that his sisters seemed to really like both of their mentors (although Honeypaw confessed that Ivytail was a bit intimidating), I decided to take the bait.

"How do you like Crowfrost?" I asked, forcing my tone to remain level, and my expression to not waver. I didn't want her distaste for Crowfrost to spill onto his apprentice.

The excitement died a little in Hailpaw, catching me off guard. They'd only taken one tour together, surely Hailpaw couldn't hate his mentor so soon?

"Crowfrost is fine," Hailpaw said with a shrug, and glanced off to the side. "He's a good leader."

 _I doubt that._ "Are you sure?" I asked, concerned. Hailpaw nodded, and I felt a sinking sensation in the pit of my stomach. _Did I make a mistake by refusing Crowfrost's offer to help train Hailpaw? I would do anything for the mite, but I figured Crowfrost didn't mean it. What if he genuinely wanted helping training Hailpaw, and he asked me because I know him best?_ I flicked an ear uneasily. Surely I was just over exaggerating. Not every mentor and apprentice bonded right away.

A yowl distracted me and I looked towards the Tall Boulder just in time to see Rowanstar perch himself on top of it. "He must be announcing the Gathering patrol," I murmured to Hailpaw. The light gray tabby tom glanced at me.

"Do you think he'll select me?" he asked.

I shot him a smile. "Most likely. He has to announce that ShadowClan has three new apprentices, so I don't see why he wouldn't bring all of you."

Once Rowanstar had the entire clan's attention he started. "The cats attending the Gathering tonight are: Crowfrost, Littlecloud, Tawnypelt, Ivytail, Applefur, Scorchfur, Owlclaw, Dawnpelt, Grassheart, Waspstripe, Honeypaw, and Cloverpaw. Finish what you're doing and then line up at the entrance."

A smile warmed my features. _Honeypaw and Cloverpaw are going to their first Gathering! They must be thrilled!_ I forgot about Hailpaw until I felt him shift from beside me, and he flattened his ears. The smile fell off my lips and I looked at him sympathetically. "Look on the bright side; this just means you're bound to go to the next Gathering, as long as you behave yourself."

Hailpaw shrugged and shuffled his paws. "I guess," he muttered.

I frowned; something was clearly bothering the young tom. But I didn't have any more time to dwell on it, so I simply flicked him with my tail and started towards the group of gathered cats.

 **Dawn Frost**

We slinked silently through the pine forest, completely at ease as we cloaked ourselves in the shadows. We paused when we reached the edge of the lake, awaiting Rowanstar's signal. When he dropped his tail we rushed forward towards the land bridge, and a couple of the faster warriors clawed their way across it. I stopped and waited my turn behind Applefur, and soon Owlclaw and Cloverpaw reached my side.

"Ivytail was looking for you," Owlclaw murmured.

I glanced at the tom who, at one point, I trained with as an apprentice. Thank StarClan Owlclaw was turned out much better than his mentor; Olivenose as well. One Smokefoot and one Crowfrost was already far too many. "Did she say why?" I asked quietly.

Owlclaw shook his head. "No. It didn't seem urgent either. I think she-"

"Dawnpelt, it's your turn!" Cloverpaw exclaimed, not impatient, more excited than anything. Even so Owlclaw gave his new apprentice a stern look.

"Cloverpaw, you don't interrupt a warrior's conversation. It's rude."

The dark gray she-cat sighed loudly. "Everything I do is rude!" she moaned.

Owlclaw snorted and I shot him a curious look. He explained, "She was talking Crowfrost's ear off on the tour today. Finally I had to reel her in when she asked Crowfrost to talk to Rowanstar about bringing her to the Gathering."

I was taken back. "And he did? Talked to Rowanstar, I mean." That didn't sound like Crowfrost at all. The entire clan knew how much he couldn't stand cats who trained in the Dark Forest, and that distaste spread to their kits as well. It was actually a hot topic in ShadowClan that Crowfrost had been selected to mentor Hailpaw. I couldn't believe he would willingly do something for one of Ratscar's kits. _Maybe he's having a change of heart?_ No. Probably not.

"I guess he did," Owlclaw replied with a shrug. "Now, as much as I enjoy chatting with you Dawnpelt," Owlclaw smiled charmingly and gestured to the land bridge with his head, and I felt a sheepish blush warm my features.

"Oh, right." I spun around and quickly scaled the tree, and leapt swift onto the other side. A quick analysis told me that ShadowClan were the first on the island. _Well, that's new. Usually RiverClan or ThunderClan are first._

Until the other clans arrived I decided to find Ivytail. It didn't take very long; she had a distinctive pelt of black and white, and it's not like I had to shove through any crowds. I found her giving Honeypaw a brief tour of the island.

"Ivytail," I called as I made my way over to the she-cat and her apprentice. "Owlclaw said you were looking for me?"

My former mentor glanced towards me and nodding, before directing her attention back to Honeypaw. "And that's it," she meowed. "Really there isn't much to see. Now you can show Cloverpaw around."

Honeypaw gave an excited bounce and mewed happily. "Cloverpaw's going to be so jealous! She hates not being first!" After shooting me her signature sweet smile she dashed back towards the land bride, eagerly awaiting her sister. Ivytail warned her to stay out of trouble as she ran, which Honeypaw acknowledged with a flick of her tail.

"You got a good one," I remarked as I watched her go. "Honeypaw's a sweetheart, and she knows how to use it to her advantage. A ShadowClan cat through and through."

"You're fond of her," Ivytail guessed.

I looked at the other warrior. "I'm fond of all of them. They all have the makings to be incredible warriors. Hailpaw's intelligent, Cloverpaw's courageous, and Honeypaw's compassionate. Combine them and you'd have the perfect warrior."

"Combine them and you'd have _you_ ," Ivytail replied.

I smiled dryly. "Well, I'm still working on the compassionate part, but thanks anyways. I learned from the best." The compliment warmed me to my toes. I'd learned the hard way that Ivytail not only expected but demanded perfection, and she rarely handed out compliments. Honeypaw would have a lot of pressure on her shoulders, but if she could handle it, she would become an outstanding warrior.

"Indeed." Ivytail gestured for me to walk with her and I did so, although curiosity was gnawing at my stomach. My patience was right alongside my compassion. Not terrible, but it definitely needed to be improved on. Of course Ivytail could simply want to talk me, which wasn't strange in the slightest, but this time felt different.

"So, you're fond of the apprentices," she prompted, and I got the feeling she wanted me to elaborate on them.

I nodded. "One day after they were kitted Pinenose asked me to watch them. She needed to stretch her legs something fierce and they were too young to be left alone, but old enough to cause trouble. I was the first cat she saw, and I would have protested but," I shrugged. "Tawnypelt would have clawed my ears off my head if I argued with an older warrior."

"I would too," Ivytail said sharply. "I trained you better than that!"

"Which is why I _didn't_ protest," I said calmly. "I might have… sulked a little, but I didn't try to argue. Anyway, the kits weren't as bad as I thought they would be. All it took to calm them down was a story, and they were just furballs, their heads too big for their paws. I grew on them before they grew on me and they would hunt me down whenever I was in camp, and demand that I tell them a story or teach them a battle move. Eventually I grew to welcome their presence." The rest was history.

Ivytail nodded, absorbing the information. "Sounds like they softened your heart."

The statement caught me off guard. It sounded strange, but I nodded slowly. "I suppose so…" I trailed off and looked questioningly at the black, white, and tortoiseshell she-cat. "Ivytail, is there something on your mind, or-?"

Ivytail sighed and shook her head, as if I'd just failed an assessment. "You never did have the most patience, did you?"

I shrugged weakly. "I waited as long as I could."

Ivytail looked towards the land bridge where RiverClan had just arrived, then towards the deputies' spots where Reedwhisker and Crowfrost were conversing. My eyes were immediately drawn to Crowfrost and I scoffed inwardly; looking at him, one would be inclined to think that he believed he was talking to a kit instead of a fellow deputy. His posture was arrogant, his eyes were bright with pride. And yet Reedwhisker didn't seem at all put off by his egotistical behavior.

"I heard that Crowfrost asked you to help him train Hailpaw," Ivytail said at last. "I was curious. You wanted an apprentice of your own, you're clearly fond of Pinenose's kits, and you could learn a lot from Crowfrost."

I snorted loudly. "Right. I could learn _so much_ from Crowfrost."

Ivytail shot me a look. "I know you don't like him Dawnpelt, but Crowfrost isn't the deputy of ShadowClan because he's handsome. He's a rather brilliant warrior." I muttered under my breath and Ivytail narrowed her eyes. "Come again?"

I met Ivytail's challenging gaze boldly and said, "You're bias, Ivytail. Crowfrost was your mate at one point."

I half-expected my former mentor to rake her claws across my face and reprimand me, but she surprised me. Instead of scolding me she simply shrugged. "Well, perhaps I am bias, but your father was never mates with him." _Ew._

"No," I started slowly, "but Crowfrost _was_ his apprentice."

Ivytail stopped and shook her head, a frustrated expression masking her features. "I didn't want to believe it, but I guess Tawnypelt was right. You refused to help train Hailpaw because you don't want to work with Crowfrost."

"I thought he made the offer out of pity!" I protested. "But it turns out it was even worse than that; he made the offer out of _obligation_! _Rowanstar asked_ _him_ to offer. Surely you would-"

"If you wanted an apprentice badly enough than the circumstances wouldn't have mattered," Ivytail said firmly. "For all you know this could have been Rowanstar's test to see if you were ready to mentor your own apprentice. You could have showed him that you are perfectly capable of training your own apprentice. But instead of looking at it as an opportunity to prove yourself, you took it as a blow to your pride. And because of that, I'm disappointed in you."

I was stunned. _I… I never thought about it that way._ That could have been a test from my father, and if it was, then I failed miserably. And I was _not_ a failure.

It didn't help that my former mentor admitted I'd disappointed her. Suddenly I felt like I was an apprentice again, struggling to master the hunter's crouch for the first time. The disapproval that had been in her pale green eyes so many moons ago was identical to the disapproval that was there now.

I wished she would have just clawed my ears off.

 **Dawn Frost**

Awhile later and all four clans were represented on the Island. I kept my distance from ThunderClan, as we still carried the grudge from when I accused Jayfeather of-… anyway, if ThunderClan was offended at all they did a creditable job of masking it.

I talked to Minnowtail and Pebblefoot of RiverClan, two siblings who I was good friends with. I shared some gossip with Swallowtail and met her new apprentice, Greenpaw. But the cat who I most enjoyed chatting with was-

"Move it, hare-brain!" A voice growled and shoved me roughly out of the way. I bristled and spun around, ready to give this cat a harsh tongue-lashing, when I realization dawned on me and a smile quickly spread across my lips.

"Heathertail!" I greeted the WindClan she-cat cheerfully. "I was wondering what cat was stupid enough to shove me." A couple of cats who'd heard the commotion and gazed at us with concern realized that there was no real possibility of a fight breaking out and resumed their previous conversations.

"You looked like you were ready to lunge at my throat," Heathertail said with a smirk. "But I think we both know you don't have the nerve to confront anyone."

I snorted. "Don't push your luck."

Heathertail's laugh was bright and airy, and she started padding towards the great oak tree where the leaders sat. "Come on, let's grab a good seat."

Despite the complaints that Heathertail was too pushy and demanding, we got along quite well. Maybe it was because we had similar personalities, or because we were in similar positions; the daughter of a clan leader, who was expected to be a shining example of cat. Either way, I was quite fond of the WindClan she-cat.

"How's WindClan been?" I asked dutifully.

Heathertail smiled. "Very good. I saw you talking to Swallowtail, so you know we have some new apprentices. The prey's been running well considering it's leaf-fall."

I nodded. "How's the Breezepelt situation going?"

Breezepelt, a Dark Forest trainee turn traitor, was banished from WindClan after the events of the Great Battle. After moons of pleading on Heathertail's part she finally convinced Onestar to send out patrols to search for her kithood friend, and after only a couple outings they found him and brought him back to WindClan. From what Heathertail told me last time it didn't sound like WindClan was thrilled to have him back in their ranks, and Breezepelt was none the too pleased either. In fact he _resented_ Heathertail for bringing him back. I hoped that things had changed, for her sake.

The brown tabby she-cat sighed, although I noted it was more out of frustration than sadness. "That tom! I swear, I'm just about ready to claw his ears off his head. With the way he's been treating me you would think that _I_ betrayed WindClan instead of _him_."

"So not well?" I summed up.

Heathertail shrugged. "I guess it depends on who you ask. I haven't had much luck restoring our friendship, but WindClan isn't so hostile towards him anymore. He's finally starting to build a couple a stable friendships, something he lacked before the Great Battle. Until then me and Sunstrike were his only real friends, but now he's taken a liking to Gorsetail and Harespring."

I raised an eyebrow. "The clan deputy, huh? Sounds like Breezepelt's making friends in high places." I flicked an ear. "If he doesn't come around to you soon I would just shove him in the lake. Maybe some cold water will clear his head."

Heathertail smirked. "Maybe I'll do that."

We finally managed to push through the throng of cats and emerged in front of the great oak tree, where the leaders gave their reports. Rowanstar, Onestar, and Mistystar were already settled and talking amongst themselves, and I assumed that Bramblestar was greeting a few of his friends, my mother, perhaps. I knew she always enjoyed catching up with her brother.

"Any particular reason you wanted to sit in the very front row?" I asked, shooting my friend a curious glance. Not that I was complaining, as I usually sat close to the front, but Heathertail never enjoyed being the center of attention more than required of her. Being the sole kit of Onestar, she had just a little more pressure on her shoulders than I did to set an example.

Heathertail returned the glance with an impish grin. "Breezepelt's stubbornness is grinding on my last nerve, so I figured that sitting right behind four very important, very _handsome_ toms might brighten my outlook a little." she licked a paw. "I also trust that Larkpaw is going to return to camp and spill the gossip that I was seen eyeing a couple toms. Maybe that'll make Breezepelt wake up a little."

I couldn't help but smirk back at my friend. "You're terrible," I teased her, and we shared a laugh. Olivenose was going to be so upset that she missed this Gathering. "So," I started, now in gossip mode. "I'm not saying that I approve of your mate-gaining methods, but _hypothetically speaking_ , which deputy do you have your eye on?"

Heathertail mock-sighed. "It's so hard to single one out. Brackenfur is the best-behaved tom in the clans, but he's a bit old for my taste, not to mention that no cat could ever take Sorreltail's position. Reedwhisker is strong and smart, but I doubt I'll ever be able to overlook RiverClan's fishy scent. Harespring is…" Heathertail trailed off and wrinkled her nose in distaste. "No. Just no."

My smirk slowly slipped off my lips. I knew where this was heading. This is how every single similar conversation went, no matter what she-cat you were talking to.

"I guess that leaves you with Crowfrost," I said dryly.

Heathertail's blue gaze fell on the ShadowClan deputy, who was currently flirting with Rosepetal of ThunderClan. "Pity," she purred. "But I suppose I'll manage." When I didn't reply she glanced at me and her expression turned amused.

"What?" I asked hotly.

The pretty WindClan warrior shrugged. "Oh, nothing. It's just… how exactly does one despise such a wonderful creation of StarClan?"

I groaned aloud. "Not you too, Heathertail! I already get enough of this from Olivenose!" Heathertail laughed brightly.

"Don't worry, I have no intentions of straying away from Breezepelt; I've invested too much time and effort into him to let some other she-cat reap my rewards. But, and I say this as your friend, Dawnpelt…" she fixed me with a serious look. "Why have you not let Crowfrost get some action from you yet?"

My jaw dropped. "Why have I- _what_?! What kind of question is that?!" I demanded.

"A very legitimate one," Heathertail replied, dead serious. "You have one of the most attractive toms in the clans as _your deputy_. He's close to your father. He's an outstanding warrior. And-just look at him, Dawnpelt! He looks _flawless_!"

"Looks can be deceiving," I snapped.

The blue-eyed she-cat ignored me and went on. "So I just want to know, how in StarClan do you live in the same clan as him and not desire him?" I had a few questions of my own. Like, how was Heathertail able to talk about such a risqué topic without blushing or stuttering? And, what was taking Bramblestar so long? Lastly, since Crowfrost was literally two fox-lengths away from us, could he hear our conversation?

"Because Crowfrost isn't as perfect as everyone makes him out to be!" I snapped, forcing myself not to shout and cause a scene, although I couldn't help it when my claws slowly slid out of my paws. "He's arrogant, judgmental, a show-off."

Heathertail looked amused. "And just what do you think cats whisper about _you_? The exact same things, my friend." I gritted my teeth tightly together; I was well aware of their whispering. "And yet," she started. "Toms still drool all over themselves whenever you walk by. You and Crowfrost have more in common than you may think."

"And that means I should just let him have his way with me?" I asked mockingly, my voice growing louder with every word. "Heathertail, I thought that if one she-cat understood where I was coming from-!"

"Dawnpelt, I'm just teasing you," the pale brown she-cat interrupted me when I was very nearly yelling, although she was grinning madly. "You make it too easy, I couldn't resist it!" she nudged my side in a friendly manner. "Of course I don't think you should submit to Crowfrost just because he's _perfect_."

I growled lowly and glared off to the side, and forced the bristling fur along my spine to lie flat. "You're lucky we're friends," I muttered under my breath as I reluctantly drew my claws back into their shelth. Heathertail just laughed.

I'd been glaring at the ground so intensely that I didn't notice Bramblestar leap into the great oak tree until Mistystar made the traditional yowl for the Gathering to commence. As the first leader to arrive on the Island Rowanstar was allowed to give his report first. He stood up and I couldn't help but feel proud of my father; he may have his lizard-brained moments as a protective father, but as a leader he was everything you could desire to be. His ginger tabby pelt positively gleamed in the full moon, and his muscles rippled easily at the slightest movements. He radiated nothing but confidence, and I found myself comparing him to ShadowClan's oh-so-loved deputy. I hated to admit that they shared any of the same traits, but at least physically they were nearly identical. The biggest difference was the color of their pelts and the fact that Rowanstar was _confident_ , while Crowfrost was _arrogant_.

"ShadowClan are faring well," Rowanstar started. "The two-leg place cats have kept to themselves, and prey is plentiful. We have a new warrior amongst our ranks, Waspstripe."

"Waspstripe! Waspstripe!" the clans boomed, and I cranked my head around and spotted him sitting in a cluster of younger warriors, looking quite proud of himself.

"We also have three new apprentices," Rowanstar continued. "The kits of Ratscar and Pinenose, Hailpaw, Cloverpaw, and Honeypaw!"

I cheered loudly when my favorite apprentices were named. Like before I glanced back and tried to spy them in the throngs of cats, but my search was fruitless. They weren't sitting with the other newly named apprentices, and I inwardly shrugged as I redirected my attention towards Rowanstar. _They're probably sitting with some of the older apprentices._ As an afterthought I added _, they better be with Amberpaw or Larkpaw. If I find out they were sneaking around the Island with a couple of toms, I'll see to it that they miss the next three Gatherings!_

Onestar went next and opened his report by announcing that one of their warriors, Whitetail, had retired to the Elder's Den. The clans cheered her name and I caught a glimpse of the small white she-cat sitting with Graystripe and Sandstorm of ThunderClan. I glanced at Heathertail. "Your mother retired?" I asked quietly.

Heathertail nodded. "She made the announcement a couple days ago. I think it upsets Onestar that he can't retire alongside her, but he's adjusting to it well. I am too, I suppose."

Onestar went on to add that WindClan had two new apprentices, Greenpaw and Oakpaw, and once again the clan cheered. I hoped that with so many new apprentices this moon Hailpaw, Cloverpaw, and Honeypaw would feel more comfortable.

Next was Bramblestar, who had very little to report. There were no new warriors or apprentices, and I was selfishly relieved. ThunderClan already had five apprentices and three queens expecting kits, including Squirrelflight, that if they had any more they would almost certainly overpower another clan in battle by sheer numbers alone. _Of course,_ I thought to myself. _Numbers would be their_ only _advantage against ShadowClan._

He did announce that prey was running well, and if it weren't for the fact that prey was also plentiful in ShadowClan, I would have wondered if the leaders were lying to make their clans appear strong as leaf-fall dwindled to an end and leaf-bare sat on the horizon.

Lastly was Mistystar. I sat tall with my ears flicked forward alertly when something caught my attention. Laughter, which wasn't at all unusual although a bit disrespectful, but it was _who_ _the laughter belonged to_ that caught my attention. _That sounds like Cloverpaw._ It sounded like it was coming from the land bridge.

I nudged Heathertail softly and whispered in her ear, "I'll be right back." Heathertail didn't take her eyes off Mistystar as she nodded and I started towards the land bridge, weaving skillfully between the throngs of cats.

When I finally reached the land bridge my eyes widened so large that I was sure they rivaled that night's full moon. There, on top of the bridge and almost across the other side was Cloverpaw and Honeypaw, along with Hawkpaw of RiverClan and Snowpaw and Dewpaw of ThunderClan. The group of apprentices were laughing and, by the looks of it, daring each other further and further across the tree. Fury bubbled deep within my chest as the creamy fur along my spine bristled, like a vixen cornered and separated from her kits.

"Cloverpaw! Honeypaw! What in StarClan do you think you're doing?!" I demanded as I leapt on top of the bridge and marched towards the apprentices.

The she-cats in question spun around, eyes wide with terror when they realized they'd been caught. "Dawnpelt!" Cloverpaw yelped. The three toms that were grouped with them also looked fearful.

My tail lashed from side to side. "What are you _doing_?" I asked again, my voice growing louder. "Your mentors told you to stay out of trouble, and you decide it's a good idea to play on the land bridge?! I thought you two had more common sense than that!"

"Dawnpelt," Snowpaw started hesitantly.

I shot the snowy white apprentice a fierce look. "As for _you three_ ," I growled. "Have you got bees in your brains? You're some of the oldest apprentices on the Island. You're the ones that the younger apprentices admire! So you decide to play on the land bridge? Do you know how dangerous that is?!"

Suddenly Cloverpaw cried, "Dawnpelt, look out! That part's slippery!" But the she-cat's warning came too late.

I was so focused on reaching the apprentices that I wasn't paying attention to where I placed my paws, and before I could even process Cloverpaw's warning I found my legs giving out from beneath me and my body fell into the lake with a loud _splash._

"Dawnpelt, Dawnpelt!" Cloverpaw screeched. "Hawkpaw, you're from RiverClan, save her!"

I opened my mouth to tell the apprentices to stay right where they were, that I could handle it myself, but before I could utter a single syllable water flooded my mouth, effectively choking me. I couldn't breathe properly and panic started to wash over me as fear gripped my body and tugged me beneath the freezing waves. _Don't quit trying,_ I told myself as I willed my paws to keep clawing at the space above my head. _Don't stop. I can't give up!_

But my efforts to break the water were useless. If anything they seemed to be doing more harm than good, and the icy cold water was quickly numbing my muscles. A memory started to play in my mind and I became rigged with fear when I immediately placed it.

I was watching Flametail fall through the ice and drown.

I squeezed my eyes shut and refused to open my mouth, despite the screams that were pressing hard against my teeth. _Flametail, please, save me! I'm not ready to die yet!_

And then, clear as the moon in the sky, I heard Flametail's voice. _Stop fighting it, Dawnpelt,_ he said in the no-nonsense tone that I despised when we were younger. _You're only delaying the unstoppable; it's your time to join StarClan. Ironic, isn't it? I can't save you from drowning, just like how you couldn't-_

Suddenly I felt teeth bite into the fur around my neck and start tugging me back towards the surface of the lake. My head broke through the water and I gasped, desperately trying to refill my lungs with air.

I vaguely realized that dozens of voices were frantically calling my name, although the sheer volume made it sound like thousands. They came from the Island, from on top of the land bridge, and from the other side of the bridge. They came from everywhere and if I had enough energy to do so I would have flattened my ears against my head.

My savior carried me on to the land opposite of the Island and disposed of my body in a rather ungraceful manner. In my typical way I used what little energy I could muster to glance back and glare at- my hazel eyes widened in disbelief.

"C-Crowfrost?" I gasped.

The black and white tom smirked in return. "The one and only." Haughty amusement danced in his eyes. "You should leave swimming to RiverClan."

I didn't know what to say. How in the name of StarClan was Crowfrost even capable of diving into the freezing lake and hauling my body back towards land? Begrudgingly granted, sure, he was strong. But surely he wasn't _that_ strong? And surely that wasn't _that_ fantastic of a swimmer!

It was just as well that I was speechless, for all I could do was stutter and stammer and I didn't want to give Crowfrost the satisfaction of watching _that_ mess. He would already spend the rest of our lives gloating about the time he saved my life-

Suddenly I wished he would have just been merciful and let me drown.

"Dawnpelt!" A frantic voice cried, and I glanced up just before Tawnypelt tackled me back to the ground. "My kitten! Are you alright?" I barely had the energy to stand to my paws once more, so I settled for nodding instead of vocalizing my answer. However it seemed as if my response was wasted on my mother, who continued to nose every inch of my body and licked my fur backwards. Some part of my conscious realized that my face was heating up with embarrassment. _If any cat was intimidated by me until tonight, they sure aren't now. All those moons of work, wasted._

The crowd of cats parted as Rowanstar trotted to where I stood on shaky legs. "Tawnypelt, give her some space," he said, but the tremor in his voice didn't go unnoticed. "She needs-"

"Don't you _dare_ tell me to give her space!" My mother snarled as she spun around to face her mate. Rowanstar was immediately taken back by her ferocity, same as every single other cat at that night's Gathering. "I just watched Dawnpelt drown! I just-" her voice cracked and I watched in mortification as tears welled up in her eyes. I could remember only twice when Tawnypelt had cried. "I just almost lost another one of my kits!"

Rowanstar's eyes softened. "Oh, Tawny," he murmured, and padded forth so that his mate could bury her head in his chest. Tawnypelt sobbed quietly into Rowanstar's thick fur and he rasped his tongue soothingly over her ears.

Meanwhile a sort of icy fear gripped at my heart once more. _It's like Flametail all over again,_ I thought. _She's acting like I actually_ died _._

"Dawnpelt, are you okay?" I nearly leaped out of my fur when Applefur appeared beside me, green eyes wide with concern. Owlclaw and Ivytail were right behind her, and I spied Heathertail on top of the land bridge, fear etched unknowingly onto her features. I swallowed and returned my gaze to Applefur, and tried to smile convincingly.

"Y-yeah," I stammered. "Just c-cold."

"You need to get back to camp," Rowanstar's voice joined the conversation, and I glanced at my father. Tawnypelt drew away from her mate and sniffed, before standing by my side once more. She nuzzled my neck and I licked her chin, in an effort to help soothe her.

"I-I-I'm f-fine," I stammered again, and cursed how weak and feeble I sounded. Of course I had to fall into the lake at the end of fall-fall, when the lake was like ice. Of course it couldn't happen in the scorching heat of Greenleaf. "I w-want to st-stay."

But Rowanstar was as firm as I was stubborn. "Absolutely not. I'm not going to risk the health of one of my warriors, nor my daughter." I was taken back when he referred to two cats instead of one. That is, until I remembered just who had saved my life.

It must have dawned on Tawnypelt as well. The usually fierce warrior gazed at Crowfrost with unmasked graciousness. "You saved Dawnpelt's life," she murmured. "I'll never be able to repay you, Crowfrost."

This couldn't be happening.

Crowfrost didn't even attempt to appear humble. No, instead he smirked and shrugged in a manner that was anything but modest, and replied, "Don't worry about it Tawnypelt. I would have done the same thing for anyone else." He ended his acceptance speech with a wink towards a group of she-cats who, all of a sudden, looked ready to faint. I rolled my eyes, utterly disgusted.

"Littlecloud," Rowanstar called to his medicine cat. "I want you and Tawnypelt to race back to camp and set up nests for Dawnpelt and Crowfrost in your den. They'll both be spending the remainder of the night under your care."

This couldn't be happening.

Littlecloud nodded dutifully and, after licking my ear one last time, Tawnypelt joined him. "Brief the rest of the clan on what happened so that they know to keep their distance from Dawnpelt and Crowfrost," Rowanstar continued. "I doubt they've already caught colds, but I'm not willing to risk it."

Littlecloud nodded. "Understood." With that last parting word he and Tawnypelt spun around and raced through the cluster of drama-deprived warriors back towards the direction of camp.

For once I was relieved when Crowfrost spoke up. "I feel great, Rowanstar," he protested. "I can understand sending Dawnpelt back to camp-" I shot the cocky warrior a cold glare. "But I'm already nearly dry."

It was true. His sleek, thick black and white pelt shed the water easily, and I resisted the urge to glare at my own fluffy cream-colored pelt, which seemed to trap the moisture beneath my skin.

But Rowanstar shook his head. "My decision is final, Crowfrost. However, if you're so fit, then I guess an escort for the two of you won't be necessary. Crowfrost can fulfill that role."

"I d-don't n-need an esc- an escort!" I snapped.

Rowanstar narrowed his eyes. "If I have to say 'final' one last time…" he growled, trailing off so that Crowfrost and I could take creative liberties with his threat. From the bottom of the land bridge Onestar snorted with amusement, and I figured he was the only leader who could afford to. No one from WindClan had been involved in the incident, for once.

"Everyone, back to Island!" Bramblestar called loudly. "Mistystar needs to finish her report and," his amber eyes fell on Snowpaw and Dewpaw. "It seems that we leaders have a couple of rules to make clear." The ThunderClan toms flinched but obeyed their leader, along with the rest of the gathered cats.

The warriors and apprentices slowly trudged back across the bridge, and I noticed a dozen or so she-cats glaring enviously at me. My jaw nearly went slack at the mere thought that they were jealous of my position. _They would be willing to drown themselves on the off-chance that Crowfrost would rescue them?_ It was times like this when my generation of cats astounded me, and not in a positive way.

Applefur nudged my side in a friendly manner as she passed me, and Ivytail and Owlclaw flicked both Crowfrost and I with their tails. I didn't even attempt to smile again; I knew for a fact I would end up cringing.

Finally it was just Rowanstar, myself, and the cat I despised with every fiber in my being.

"Don't rush yourselves," Rowanstar advised us. "I don't care what either of you say, I've watched you both grow up and I know full well that you two are much too stubborn for your own good." I winced while Crowfrost smiled sheepishly. "I know you're both exhausted, so don't waste precious energy racing each other back to camp. Conserve it before a fever is unavoidable."

Rowanstar moved forward so that he could lay his tail across Crowfrost's back, before turning towards me and nuzzling the side of my face. "I'm so relieved you're safe," he murmured, and only then did I realize that my swim had affected him just as much as it affected Tawnypelt. Rowanstar was just better at appearing strong. "I thought we were going to lose you too…"

"So did I," I whispered back, and suddenly recalled Flametail's voice. Oh, I wanted to say it wasn't really Flametail so badly that _I ached_ , but I knew my brothers' voices better than I knew my own. _'You're only delaying the unstoppable; it's your time to join StarClan.'_ Flametail refused to save me. He wanted me to die.

I squeezed my eyes shut and buried my head in Rowanstar's ginger pelt. "So did I…"

 **Dawn Frost**

The trip back to camp was excruciating.

Rowanstar had been right; we were both exhausted. Myself more than Crowfrost, although I would rather die before I admitted that to _him_. Besides, it seemed unfair. Crowfrost had dived into a lake, swam down and retrieved my flailing body and then not only hauled me back to the surface, _but back to dry land._

What had _I_ done? Fell into said lake like a lizard-brain.

And yet _I_ was the one who was struggling to place one paw in front of the other? Right. Because that made sense.

Anyway, I was perfectly content to continue struggling and giving Crowfrost the silent treatment, as I tended not to speak to cats I couldn't stand if offered the option. Crowfrost on the other paw was more social than I was and finally the silence broke him.

"You look pathetic," he snapped, demanding my attention.

I rolled my hazel eyes. "Thanks. Because I didn't already- whoa, what are you doing?" I asked, jerking away from him. This time it was he who rolled his frosty blue eyes. The exact same eyes that Olivenose, along with dozens of other she-cats, seemed to be obsessed with. My opinion of them had yet to waver.

"Supporting you," he said, as if the fact were obvious. "You look ready to fall on your face."

I growled. "What, you aren't tired of playing hero yet? You already humiliated me in front of four clans when you pulled me out of the lake, and now you're going to be oh-so noble and let me lean on you?" I snorted. "In case you haven't noticed, there aren't any she-cats around to praise you for your selfless behavior this time." Ugh, Crowfrost and selfless didn't even belong in the same topic together.

Crowfrost's scoffed. "Oh _please,_ you humiliated _yourself_ when you fell on the land bridge. Don't try to blame your embarrassment on me _for saving your life_!"

"I never asked to be saved!" I cried.

"So what, you were perfectly fine and capable of reaching the shore yourself?" Crowfrost demanded. I opened my mouth to say yes, yes that was exactly it, but in reality it was the opposite. If it weren't for Crowfrost I would have drowned.

I glared at him. "Fine then, I never asked _you_ to save me."

The handsome black and white tom snorted. "Well guess what Sweetheart, not everything goes your way. Sometimes I save your life, and other times I help you back to camp. Either way it's bound to happen so stop whining so much and _get over yourself_!" My jaw dropped.

" _I'm_ the one who needs to get over their self?!" I cried incredulously. " _You_ are the most stuck-up, arrogant, selfish cat alive!"

"You forgot handsome, talented, and perfect," he added, although I couldn't tell if he was being serious or just trying to grind on my last nerve. Probably a lot of both.

But nonetheless, when he moved to help support my weight, I didn't protest. He made it perfectly clear that any attempts to do so would be useless anyway. And really, I was too tired to keep our game going on for much longer.

We started our journey once more and blissful silence fell over us like a sheet of snow, however I doubted it would last much longer. Turns out I was right.

"And stop acting like my fanbase consists of just she-cats!" The oh-so humble tom added. "I'm admired by she-cats _and toms_!"

It seemed like we'd started a new game to see who could roll their eyes the most before the night was over. "My bad, I forgot about Ferretclaw."

"It's not just Ferretclaw!" Crowfrost snapped. "Ferretclaw isn't normal, he doesn't even count."

I scoffed. "He isn't even normal… why does he look up to you so much when you clearly hate him?"

Crowfrost shrugged, a disgusted look upon his features. "If I knew why than I would stop doing whatever it is."

"Even existing?" I asked, mock-hopefully. "Because let's face it, that's probably the reason."

The ShadowClan deputy growled softly. "I have absolutely no idea why you're such a hit with the toms. You're unbearable!"

"I could say the exact same thing about you," I snapped.

"Go ahead," he snarled. "It's not like you haven't before!"

"Why did you save me?!"

The question caught us both off guard. That wasn't what I was supposed to shout. That wasn't the question I was supposed to ask. But, I realized, it was the question that had been pushed firmly down until it wrangled itself free and snuck up on me.

We didn't miss a beat as we contained to walk towards ShadowClan, although I was now hyper-aware of the fact that our bodies were pressed together, as he supported my weight. I was even more hyper-aware of the silence that wrapped suffocatingly tight around us that for once, Crowfrost had no intentions of breaking.

"Well?" I demanded. "Don't pretend like it's not a brilliant question. I hate you. You hate me. So why didn't you let some RiverClan warrior save me?"

Crowfrost shrugged, begrudgingly. "The glory, of course. Everyone already loved me, but now I'm like StarClan in their eyes. Now they'll start to wonder if there's anything I can't do." After a second he added, "Not like I didn't have any competition. By the time I reached the foot of the bridge several other toms were already perched on top of it, ready to dive. I overheard a couple of them grumbling when I finally dropped you on land. They weren't pleased with me."

Disgust curled my muzzle. Although I would have loved for someone who wasn't Crowfrost to rescue me, the fact that those toms – most who I'd likely already rejected some way or another – had rushed to my rescue only because they wished to court me was disgustingly shallow.

"Then I guess I should thank you for getting to me before they did," I meowed dryly. A heart-beat passed, and then two, then three, four. "Thank you…"

"… You're welcome."

 **Dawn Frost**

"Well, _there's_ something I thought I'd never see," Ratscar said with a smirk when Crowfrost and I made our grand entrance.

Crowfrost growled loudly and I shot the older warrior a piercing glare, but other than that we both ignored him. Maybe because it was the exact same thing that every other cat was thinking, ourselves included.

Quite a crowd had gathered to greet us, but Tawnypelt ushered them back. "Stay back," she warned her clanmates, back to her usual no-nonsense attitude. "We're not chancing any of you getting sick."

Littlecloud padded over to us and gestured to the medicine cat den with his tail. "Tawnypelt and I already prepared you both new nests. Go ahead and settle down, and I'll check on you in a second."

Crowfrost and I nodded, and he finally drew away from me so that I could fend for myself. I didn't complain when exhaustion rushed over me in a whole new wave, and instead followed him. When I reached the den he'd already claimed the nest closet to the entrance, so I took the one further back. _Fine by me. It just means that I get the quieter nest._

"If I get sick," Crowfrost started, more to himself than to me. "I think I'll die."

I rolled my eyes. "A fever isn't _that_ extreme."

"I meant with boredom, not with fever," he retorted. "I don't know how Rowanstar expects me to stay in the medicine cat den all day if I _am_ sick."

A yawn parted my jaws as I snuggled deeper into my new nest. _Hmm, Tawnypelt always did make the best nests._ "The same way he would expect any other warrior to," I replied. "Just do it."

Crowfrost didn't respond. Soon Littlecloud padded in and started examining us, and I almost fell asleep countless times in the middle of his observations.

"So?" Crowfrost prompt, rather impatiently. "Are we sick?"

"It's too soon to tell," Littlecloud replied. "I want to check you both out again tomorrow, which means no morning walk _Crowfrost_ ," the black and white tom pouted. "But I think you'll be good to go." A flick of the tail was the most excitement I was capable of showing, but Crowfrost nearly leapt out of his nest and cheered.

"Ugh, how do you have so much energy?" I growled quietly, not particularly upset when he didn't hear me.

Crowfrost's enthusiasm was cut short when a figure burst through the den entrance and all but tackled the ShadowClan deputy. "Crowclawfrost!" the warrior exclaimed. "I was so worried about you!"

 _Crowclawfrost? … Ferretclaw?_ A grin slowly played across my lips as I stood up in my nest, eagerly waiting to see how this scene would play out. I wasn't extremely fond of Ferretclaw for his presence annoyed me greatly, but when he was making _Crowfrost_ suffer… well, I could tolerate that. The show would be worth staying awake for another few minutes.

"Ferretclaw?" Crowfrost gasped, as the wind had been knocked out of his lungs. "What are you-get off of me, badger-breath!"

"Ferretclaw," Littlecloud scolded the younger warrior. "I told you to leave Crowfrost and Dawnpelt alone for the night."

"Dawnpelt?" Ferretclaw glanced at me, and I was taken back when his eyes narrowed.

"What?" I demanded.

"It's _your_ fault that Crowfrost might catch a cold," Ferretclaw growled.

My jaw dropped. _This conversation again?!_ "It's not like I fell in the lake because I knew Crowfrost would rescue me," I retorted, pelt heating up with embarrassment. I hated to say "Crowfrost rescued me". But it was better than saying, "Crowfrost saved my life". That was just going too far.

Ferretclaw sniffed disdainfully. "Well you should have assumed he would. Crowfrost isn't capable of ignoring cats in need!"

"Oh, just you wait until I get my claws on you," Crowfrost growled, wrangling unsuccessfully from underneath Ferretclaw. "Great StarClan, how are you so heavy?! What, do you eat badgers or something?!"

Ferretclaw gazed down at his idol with wide eyes. "Would eating a badger earn me your undying love and approval?" he asked seriously.

Crowfrost stopped withering long enough to return Ferretclaw's wide-eyed stare, although his frosty blue eyes were filled with confusion and disgust. "I… don't know? No. Yes? Maybe?" the black and white tom scoffed, thoroughly frustrated. "What kind of question is that anyway?!"

"Ferretclaw, you need to leave." Littlecloud said sternly, and somehow managed to shove Ferretclaw off of the ShadowClan deputy. The cream and gray tom tried to protest but his complaints ended as soon as the medicine cat threatened to send for Weaselfur of WindClan. For whatever reason Ferretclaw was either deathly afraid or incredibly disgusted by Weaselfur. It really just depended on the moon.

When the admittedly-determined warrior scampered out of the medicine cat's den (but not before calling, "I'll visit you first thing in the morning, Crowfrostyface!") Crowfrost settled back down in his nest, looking incredibly aggravated. "Why does Ferretclaw feel the need to make me miserable?" he grumbled to no one in particular.

I'd planned on just ignoring the arrogant tom and finally going to sleep, but Littlecloud flicked Crowfrost with his tail and replied, "Maybe because he knows how much you crave the attention of others and is determined to give it to you?"

I snorted.

Crowfrost frowned but didn't respond, and the small medicine cat looked towards me. "You're friends behaved much more maturely, although," he paused to smile briefly. "I believe that Tawnypelt had to sit on Tigerheart to keep him from bursting in like, well, Ferretclaw." I returned Littlecloud's smile with a weak one of my own, and even that took more effort than I would admit. Really the very thought of someone informing Tigerheart that I'd nearly drown that night was enough to make me want to throw up. _Poor Stripes,_ I thought. _He must be dying to check on me._ Suddenly I felt the exact same way; I needed to make sure my brother was okay.

It was almost like Littlecloud had read my mind, for right before I opened my mouth to ask if I could see him, he scampered out of the den, presumably to greet Rowanstar and give him his report.

I sighed, frustrated and disappointed, but too tired to chase after him. Instead I closed my eyes and evened my breathing, and allowed my thoughts to drift. They ended up on Hailpaw, and how I wished he'd been at the Gathering to stop his sisters from leaving with Hawkpaw, Snowpaw, and Dewpaw. Hailpaw was a responsible and mature tom considering his young age; there was no doubt in my mind that he would scold Cloverpaw and Honeypaw when they returned. _And to think,_ I thought sleepily. _I was so close to mentoring him. If only Rowanstar hadn't changed his mind at the last second and assigned him to Crowfrost._ Ivytail's lecture from earlier that night came back to me. _"For all you know this could have been Rowanstar's test to see if you were ready to mentor your own apprentice. You could have showed him that you are perfectly capable of training your own apprentice. But instead of looking at it as an opportunity to prove yourself, you took it as a blow to your pride."_

I opened my hazel eyes again and flattened my ears against my head. I hadn't looked at it that way, not until Ivytail brought the theory to light. And now that she had there was another theory swimming around in my mind; what if Rowanstar knew that Crowfrost wouldn't devote himself completely to Hailpaw's training, but that I would? What if he gave Crowfrost an apprentice to help him get over the grudge he held to those who trained in the Dark Forest, and wanted me involved to make sure that Hailpaw's training wouldn't suffer, in case Crowfrost wouldn't be able to get over himself?

If Hailpaw didn't get the training he deserved, would it be my fault?

In that instant I knew what I had to do.

"Crowfrost," I hissed softly. "Crowfrost!"

The blue-eyed tom didn't even grace me with a glance. "What?" he asked, keeping his frosty gaze trained on the world outside the den. I had to bite my tongue to keep from insulting him.

"I want to train Hailpaw with you," I said, fighting to keep any disgust or resentment out of my tone. I already knew that Crowfrost wouldn't be happy with my change of heart; I couldn't give him any reason to say no.

This caught his his attention. Crowfrost turned around to look at me, eyes filled with too many emotions for me to place. Surprise, confusion, and anger all seemed to be present. " _What_?" he asked, even though we both knew that he'd heard me.

I stood my ground. "I don't trust you with Hailpaw's training," I elaborated. "I want to make sure you don't neglect him."

It didn't take long for the anger in his eyes to give way to fury, and then to consume every other emotion that had been there. " _The nerve_ you have is unbelievable, you know that?" he demanded. "It's unbelievable!"

"Right, because you're _so_ humble," I retorted sarcastically.

Crowfrost stood to his paws, tail lashing behind him like a serpent in the grass. "How dare you say I'm not capable of training Hailpaw!"

"That's not what I said at all!" I exclaimed. "I said I don't trust you to _give it your all_!" Crowfrost opened his mouth to argue when I beat him to it. "And don't say that you plan of putting your everything into his education, because the entire clan knows that you _don't_." I narrowed my eyes. "And it's just because he's Ratscar and Pinenose's kit."

Crowfrost stared at me for a long, hard moment, all the while the expression in his eyes never changed. I held his gaze boldly, challenging even, but I felt my confidence slowly chipping away. _I already said no once,_ I thought, as worry started to seep in. _What if Crowfrost says no? Would Rowanstar force him to accept me, or would he tell me that I missed my chance?_

A few tense seconds later and I was convinced that Crowfrost was only remaining silent to torture me. My patience was waning thin and just before I nearly broke the silence myself, he growled spat, "Fine. You can help."

I released a breath I wasn't aware I'd been holding.

"But," he growled. "Realize Hailpaw is still _my_ apprentice, not yours. Whatever I say about his training goes, and I leave no room for arguments. Understand, Sweetheart?"

I was forced to stifle a growl of my own and nodded stiffly. "Absolutely."

"Good." The fury in Crowfrost's cold blue orbs had yet to dim, even when he turned around and curled up in his nest. "Tomorrow Ivytail, Owlclaw and I will be teaching the apprentices the basics of hunting. We'll see how they do." The unspoken meaning behind Crowfrost's elaboration rang clear; I'll see how _you_ do.

It took everything ounce of self-discipline I had to not release that caged growl.

I didn't respond, for I knew that if I did then the growl would slip past my teeth, which Crowfrost surely wouldn't ignore. Instead I returned to my sleeping position and closed my eyes. This time I didn't have to let my thoughts wander for sleep to come to me; it washed over me like a flood the second I closed my eyes.

 _Maybe there is something to be said for Crowfrost's eyes,_ I barely had time to think before I found myself in a dream-like state. _They're almost as dramatic as he is._

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **Who did you expect to save Dawnpelt?**

 **#I tried to surprise you but it probably failed.**

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 **So this chapter took** _ **forever**_ **to get out. The main reason is because I've lost a lot of interest in the Warriors fandom and have decided to focus on my other fandoms (on my new account, KatieK102). Don't fret because I do intend on finishing all of my previously started Warrior fics, it'll just take time. So for the time being I've decided to focus on one Warriors fic at a time until completion, starting with Dawn Frost. Dawn Frost is the easiest fic to muster motivation for, and this chapter was actually a joy to write once I worked up the motivation.**

 **I want to thank you guys in advance for sticking with me despite everything! I don't deserve such loyal fans, but I made sure to make this chapter extra long as an apology gift? You're more than welcome to take all your anger out on me in a review ;)**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	4. I'll Loosen Up if You Back Off

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

* * *

 **Chapter Four - You Loosen Up and I'll Back Off**

* * *

 **"No matter what I say, deep down I still don't know how I feel about you." - Unknown**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

I awoke the next morning like I had every morning my entire life; right before the moon disappeared behind the mountain peaks and the sun replaced it.

Not everything was the same though. I didn't usually wake up in the medicine cat den with Dawnpelt just a couple lengths behind me, her creamy-colored chest gently raising and falling. I couldn't help the disgust that etched itself into my expression, which was really quite ironic. I doubted that many ever felt disgust when they looked upon the gorgeous she-cat.

But I wasn't so arrogant that I wouldn't admit that I liked Dawnpelt more at that very moment than any other moment in my life; she couldn't nag me when she was asleep.

As I continued to gaze at Dawnpelt I felt the disgust slip off my handsome features, and defeat started to replace it. I released the caged sigh that had built up in my chest, softly so as to not disturb Littlecloud or Dawnpelt.

It was devastating in a sort way, how just the mere thought of training Hailpaw with Dawnpelt was enough to make me feel defeat. And everyone knew that defeat was a feeling I didn't experience very often.

I stood abruptly to my paws and, after making sure that Littlecloud was still sound asleep, padded quietly out of the den and into the camp. Every morning I went on a walk through the pine forest before anyone else was awake so that I could clear my head, and today would be no different. No paranoid medicine cat was going mess with _my_ mornings.

 **Dawn Frost**

By the time I returned to camp a couple of the early-risers were already moving about, grooming their pelts or going through the meek fresh-kill pile. I noticed Rowanstar was perched upon the Tall Boulder, and when his amber gaze fell on me, I prepared myself for the lecture I was about to receive.

"Is it really so hard for you to stay still for one morning?" The ginger tabby tom demanded as he jumped off of the boulder and landed nimbly on his paws, before making his way towards me.

"It really is." I confirmed.

Rowanstar narrowed his eyes. "Your health is at stake, Crowfrost. Leaf-bare is almost upon us and the last thing I need is for my deputy to catch a cold."

"Littlecloud checked me out last night," I protested. "He said I was good to go!"

Rowanstar snorted. "He said he thought you were fine, but that he wasn't positive and wanted to look you over again in the morning. But when he woke up this morning only Dawnpelt was in her nest."

I shrugged dismissively. "Alright, so I worded it a little differently than he did, but you know how paranoid Littlecloud has been lately!"

Rowanstar's expression was dry. "Yes. Because it's leaf-bare. The season when cats are most likely to catch a cold after diving into a lake."

"It's _almost_ leaf-bare," I corrected my clan leader. I knew I was grinding against his last nerve when his gaze sharpened.

"How many more times are we going to have these arguments, Crowfrost?" he growled. "I understand that you don't like to break routine, and I understand that you can't stand to sit still; I've always taken these factors into consideration when I order you to do something. But as the deputy of ShadowClan you're-"

"I'm expected to set an example," I finished bitterly. Great StarClan I _hated_ this lecture!

Rowanstar looked just as frustrated as I felt. "You had to stay in camp for _one morning_ , Crowfrost. That isn't asking a lot."

"I'm not sick!" I exclaimed.

"It isn't about that anymore!" Rowanstar snarled. "I'm relieved that you don't feel ill, but the problem is that you were given a direct order that you _deliberately disobeyed_! And this isn't the first time either; in fact, you rebel against authority more than any other cat I know. How am I supposed to justify your right to give orders to others when you can't follow your own?"

A low growl rumbled deep within my throat and I lowered my glare to the ground. I didn't have an answer for him.

But Rowanstar wasn't finished with me yet. "We've been having these arguments ever since you were apprenticed to me, Crowfrost, and yet you've still not learned from them." The ginger tom's voice was firm and unwavering as he went on. "I'm tired of telling you the same things over and over and you pretending to have never heard them before. Not only are you a warrior, you're the clan deputy. And yet I've watched kits act moons more mature than you do at times." My head snapped up and I stared at Rowanstar with wide eyes. _Well, that one stung._ Rowanstar was absolutely unforgiving as he went on. "You're not my apprentice anymore, but if you don't start giving me the respect I deserve than I swear to StarClan I will send you back to the Apprentice Den until I feel you're ready to resume your position."

My claws dug into the marshy ground and I bit my tongue so hard it bled. "You would chose someone else to be your deputy?"

Rowanstar didn't even hesitate. "If I thought you were no longer worthy of the position? Absolutely. You've developed a superiority-complex where you believe that you're irreplaceable, and if you don't start making different decisions than you're going to be in for a rude-awakening."

If he were anyone other than Rowanstar, anyone other than my former mentor, I would have tackled him ages ago.

"Do you understand me?" Rowanstar asked.

My claws dug deeper into the marsh. "Yes."

The amber-eyed tom flicked his tail. "Good. Now, go and organize the patrols. I think they're tired of waiting for you."

I didn't stay still and watch Rowanstar pad over to the fresh-kill pile. I spun around and tried to keep my fury in check when I saw that nearly every single member of ShadowClan had been awoken by our argument and was staring at me with wide eyes or barely-suppressed smirks. I gritted my teeth tightly together as I ground out, "Olivenose, you're leading a hunting patrol. Take Applefur and Pinenose." I droned on minute longer, assigning Scorchfur to the RiverClan border and Tigerheart to the ThunderClan border.

Scorchfur shot me a concerned glance as he padded past me which I pointedly ignored, although I accidentally made eye contact with Smokefoot, who sat in front of the Elders' Den. I quickly looked away but not before Smokefoot shot me me a look that clearly read, _we'll talk later._

I sighed as I made my way towards the Medicine Cat Den. _Great. First Rownstar yells at me, now Scorchfur and Smokefoot want to yell at me, and I'm sure once Dawnpelt hears of my argument she'll want to yell at me too._ Speaking of everyone's favorite nag.

Much to my surprise, Dawnpelt was still curled up in her nest, sound asleep when I trotted inside the den. Everyone knew that Rowanstar's daughter was not a morning cat, but she wasn't usually the last cat awake.

From where he was sorting herbs in the corner of the den, Littlecloud spoke up. "Last night took a toll on her. She's exhausted."

I scoffed. "I did more work than she did and I was still the first cat awake." My eyes narrowed. "Speaking of which, thanks for reporting me to Rowanstar. I'm sure you heard that argument we just had."

"It would be hard not to. He got quite loud," Littlecloud replied, picking a few herbs up in his jaws before dropping them in front of me. "Feverfew," he elaborated. "If you do have a fever, this will cure it."

"I'm not sick," I growled.

Littlecloud didn't even blink. "Good. These herbs will make sure it stays that way." For a heartbeat neither of us moved, both of us staring down the other. Finally he flicked an ear and said, "I have to go check on Snowbird. Make sure Dawnpelt eats her herbs before you set out." Then the little tom brushed past me, picking his way to the nursery.

I watched him leave for a few seconds with narrowed eyes. The old medicine cat walked very carefully, making sure there weren't any stones or sticks in his path. He was quite thin, I also noted, and his pelt no longer gleamed with health. _He won't be along for much longer,_ I thought to myself. _And Snowbird still has a couple moons before she kits._ I hoped that Littlecloud was in better shape than I was giving him credit for, because if he died before he could train a new medicine cat…

I shook my head to chase away the thoughts. Littlecloud would be fine. The patient but firm medicine cat had been around ever since I was kitted, and would probably outlive me too.

I dragged my gaze away from Littlecloud until it rest on Dawnpelt, and then I sighed. I really didn't want to wake the she-cat up, for she was not pleasant to be around when she first woke up. Actually she wasn't pleasant to be around _ever_. But duty called, and I couldn't just take Hailpaw out without her.

… could I?

Another sigh escaped my maw. No, no I couldn't. Not after agreeing to let her help me last night. And so, with that thought forcing me forward, I prodded her roughly awake with an outstretched paw.

"Wake up," I ordered, not the least bit kind. "If you want to come with me and Hailpaw then you need to get up _now_."

The creamy-colored warrior growled and shifted in her nest. "Why are we leaving so early? The _toads_ aren't even croaking at this hour!"

I snorted. "If they aren't then it's because the hunting patrol's caught them all. Hate to break it to you Sweetheart, but you're the only cat not awake." That woke her up.

Dawnpelt's eyes shot open and she jumped to her paws, a panicked look in her eyes. "You're lying!" she _rudely_ accused me. "There's no way I'm the last cat awake! What about Oakfur?"

I tipped my head thoughtfully to the side as I tried to recall whether or not I'd seen the elder, who had a reputation for always being the last cat awake and the first to fall asleep. "Well, maybe not _the very last_. Oakfur might have outlasted y-oh, wait, I saw him by the fresh-kill pile. Nope, you're the very last cat awake."

Dawnpelt huffed loudly as she licked down a couple stray tufts of fur. "Unbelievable. I slept even longer than _Oakfur_." Suddenly her head shot up and she regarded me harshly. "Why didn't you wake me up sooner?" she demanded.

I returned her glare with an icy one of my own. "What, do you think everyone's lives revolve around you? I had more important matters to attend to." Like taking a walk through the pine forest, and picking a fight with my clan leader. All very important matters that required my utmost attention.

While Dawnpelt finished making herself look presentable I pushed the remaining feverfew leaves towards her. "Feverfew," I told her. "Littlecloud said they would-"

"Fight off fever and make sure I don't catch a cold, I got it," the pretty warrior cut me off, rather rudely.

I blinked. "How do you know what they do? You weren't awake when Littlecloud explained their purpose."

Dawnpelt shot me a weary glance. "Common sense? It's in the _name_." Huh. So it was. "Sorry, I forgot you're a bit lacking in that department."

I scowled. "Just because I'm not a stick in the mud like some cats doesn't mean I lack common sense. I just choose to not use it."

"If you really had any common sense then you would know to use it," Dawnpelt shot back. "Just because I don't charge recklessly into situations doesn't mean I'm boring!"

"Um, am I interrupting something?" a voice from behind me asked, and I spun around only to come face to face with my new apprentice. Hailpaw looked uncomfortable as he glanced between myself and Dawnpelt, but other than that he remained the same as always; unimpressed and aloof.

Unconsciously I made up my mind to force the young tom to lighten up. It would be torture enough to have to train him with Dawnpelt; I didn't need two annoying know-it-alls.

"Nothing at all," I replied smoothly. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Dawnpelt glare at me for a second longer before bending down to lick up the feverfew. "What's up, Hailpaw? Are Ivytail and Owlclaw ready?"

A nod was all I received.

Holding back a sigh I stood to my paws and explained how Dawnpelt would join us from now on, serving as a second opinion in regards to the young tom's training. I could tell that Dawnpelt's job description annoyed her, and I didn't even attempt to erase my smug smirk. _What, did you really expect me to call you his co-mentor? The truth hurts, doesn't it, Sweetheart?_

It was my turn to be annoyed when Hailpaw's dark blue eyes brightened, as they came to rest on the she-cat. He almost even smiled. _Huh! When Rowanstar assigned me to mentor him he looked about as excited as a dead toad, and I'm the deputy! This apprentice has it all backwards!_

Well, that was okay. If Hailpaw was such a bad judge of character then that was his fault, not mine. Besides, once he saw what a horrible cat Dawnpelt was, he was sure to quit admiring her.

"Come on," I muttered, brushing past the gray tabby tom and making my way towards the other mentors. "We've got a lot of work ahead of us."

 **Dawn Frost**

I had made a lot of, ahem, _questionable decisions_ throughout my life. From accepting Smokefoot's dare to dig to the bottom of a red ant hill as an apprentice, to learning how to swim so that I could impress RiverClan she-cats (and almost drowning my first several attempts), to flirting with Thornclaw of ThunderClan, again, on a dare.

"Lower your stomach a little more-"

"If he lowers himself any further he'll be pressing against the ground!"

But agreeing to let Dawnpelt help me mentor Hailpaw was by far the most questionable decision I'd ever made in my life. Heck, it wasn't even questionable, it was downright _stupid_.

"That _is_ the goal of the hunter's crouch."

"Lizard-brain, if he moves like that then pine needles and twigs will attach themselves to his pelt! Besides, no cat hunt while their stomach is dragging against the ground!"

Maybe I did have a fever last night, because I couldn't fathom why in StarClan I would willing torture myself like this.

" _I_ can."

"My bad. I mean no cat can hunt _effectively_ -"

And what torture it was.

"Oh, so now you're questioning my hunting abilities?" I demanded.

Dawnpelt looked about as frustrated as I felt. "Well if you seriously hunt while you drag your stomach across the ground, then yes, I question your abilities!"

"That's enough!" Ivytail finally snapped, shoving herself in between the aggravating vixen and myself. "You two are some of the most highly respected warriors in ShadowClan - Rowanstar's daughter and the clan deputy - and you've not stopped bickering since we've left the camp! What kind of example are you setting for the apprentices?" With an irritated sweep of her tail the senior warrior gestured to the three apprentices.

Cloverpaw had developed an intense interest in a pine cone by her paws, Honeypaw's light blue eyes flitted aimlessly across the forest, and Hailpaw's body was stretched every which way as he tried (and failed) to obey both my and Dawnpelt's orders. A look of confusion masked his features, and I thought he looked kinda ridiculous.

"You look ridiculous," I said bluntly.

"Crowfrost!" Dawnpelt snapped.

"What?" I demanded. "Look at him and tell me you don't think he looks ridiculous!"

"I-..." Dawnpelt trailed off as she focused on Hailpaw, and a look of unease played across her features.

"Ha! You do think he looks ridiculous!" I exclaimed, triumphant.

"Can I get up now?" Hailpaw asked softly, dark blue eyes trained solely on the pine tree in front of him. I sighed and tapped his back with my tail, giving him the signal to sit back up. I wasn't so cruel that I would force him to continue to look like a lopsided badger who was blind in one eye and had just lost a fight with a fox and-

"Maybe we should end today's session?" Owlclaw suggested, somewhat weary. "We've taught them the basics, we can pick up where we left off tomorrow?"

Dawnpelt snorted. "We can't end the session like this! We have to end it on a high note! We-"

"Excuse me," I interrupted the she-cat who, _as always_ , was sticking her muzzle where it didn't belong. "But I don't believe you have a say in this argument. Correct me if I'm wrong but," I smiled innocently at the fuming she-cat. "You're not a mentor."

Dawnpelt gritted her teeth as she growled, "I'm mentoring Hailpaw with you."

I shook my head. "No, not really. You're more of a mentor's assistant."

"A _mentor's assistant_?!"

"Right!" Owlclaw exclaimed brightly. "And on that high note, this training session is over!"

 **Dawn Frost**

The trip back to camp was, in a single word, uncomfortable. I was, of course, at the head of the patrol, with Dawnpelt and Hailpaw following a little ways back. Behind them were Ivytail and Honeypaw, and then Owlclaw was wisely holding back Cloverpaw. He didn't trust her not to blurt out any questions that might make the journey anymore awkward.

But I doubted Cloverpaw was _that_ stupid. The tension that hung in the air was unbearably strong, as if one wrong word would start another argument between Dawnpelt and myself. If one spark was lit then the entire forest would catch fire.

Yet somehow we managed to reach the camp without any more arguments. I actually thought that I would be able to avoid Dawnpelt for the rest of the day, until she spoke up from behind me. "Crowfrost, we need to talk."

I rolled my eyes; that's how it always was. No "Crowfrost, can I have a word with you?" No "I think we need to talk, Crowfrost." Nope. It wasn't an inquiry, it wasn't a suggestion, it was _a demand_. Because that's exactly the type of she-cat Dawnpelt was.

But nonetheless I found myself slowing down at the camp entrance, letting Ivytail, Owlclaw, and their apprentices pass me by. Hailpaw hesitated for a moment, his dark blue eyes darting between Dawnpelt and myself. Before I could tell him to go ahead Dawnpelt nodded, giving the signal herself.

I gritted my teeth. "Anything specific you wanted to talk about, Sweetheart?"

"First of all stop calling me 'Sweetheart'!" the pretty warrior snapped.

"Sure, no problem." I replied. "After all, there are _so many_ other things I'd rather call you."

Dawnpelt's hazel eyes narrowed but she went on. "Secondly, we need to discuss my purpose."

I shrugged. "Well I for one firmly believe that the Dark Forest placed you here to annoy the daylights out of me. But," I smirked as she started to fume. "I have a feeling you meant something else."

"My role in Hailpaw's training," Dawnpelt growled.

"I already told you your role," I said, and sat down and started to groom my sleek pelt. "You're my assistant."

"That's not what we agreed on last night!" she protested. "I said I wanted to train Hailpaw _with you_ , not be your personal servant!"

"Well, _see_ , the thing is," I started slowly, as if I were talking to a kit. "We never actually _agreed_ on your job descriptions. You just _assumed_ we were co-mentoring Hailpaw and, well," I shrugged. "Sorry _Sweetheart_ , but that's just not going to happen."

"What about the first time you asked me?" she demanded. "You said you wanted me to help you mentor him."

"Right," I agreed easily. "I did. And then you rejected my kind and reasonable offer, and I made a few modifications. Really you only have yourself to blame for the situation."

I thought Dawnpelt was going to explode with all the anger she was clearly shoving down. "Crowfrost," she growled between gritted teeth. "We can't do this if we can't get along!"

"I know, and I agree completely," I replied. "And since I'm Hailpaw's mentor and you're my assistant, the only way for us to get along is for you to do everything I say."

"That's not going to happen!"

"Then leave."

"That's not happening either." She snorted, "especially after I've seen how you handle Hailpaw."

And there she went again, questioning my abilities. Irritation bubbled furiously in my stomach and I resisted the urge to just rake my claws across her pretty face, and see how confident she felt then. _Why does she always have to make our fights personal and bring up my abilities?_

"While we're discussing things that need to happen," I growled. "You need to stop acting so motherly over Hailpaw."

"I'm not acting motherly!" Dawnpelt spat.

 _Liar._ Scrambling to gather what little patience I had left, I said, "Whenever I give Hailpaw an order he always looks at you for confirmation."

"That's not my fault!" she protested. "I've known him since he was a kit!"

"It is your fault because _you respond_ ," I snapped, finally at my breaking point. I was tired of this conversation, I was tired of this day, and _I was tired of Dawnpelt_. "If you want kits so badly then stop being so picky, settle down with a mate, and have your own!" I finished with a snarl.

Dawnpelt's hazel eyes widened for a heartbeat before they narrowed into dangerous slits. I actually thought she was going to make a dive for my throat and I braced myself to fight her off, but at the last second she shook her head and stormed past me, into camp, tail lashing like a serpent behind her. I released a sigh I didn't know I'd been holding. _Great StarClan, why does she have to be so stubborn?_

I licked down the fur that still bristled along my spine, attempting to cool down before I entered the camp. After watching Dawnpelt burst in a crazed-animal (which she most definitely was), I was sure they expected me to do the same.

Once I was as calm as I could get I collected my thoughts, and then strolled confidently into camp, smirk strategically in tact. But the smirk didn't stay in place for very long. As soon as I entered the camp my eyes landed on Scorchfur and Smokefoot, who looked like they were waiting for me. I held back another sigh as I admitted defeat early and made my way over to them.

Well. At least there was no way training sessions with Dawnpelt could get any worse.

 **Dawn Frost**

I swear, StarClan listened in on my _private_ thoughts just so that they could prove me wrong.

Sessions with Dawnpelt proceeded to get much, much worse. We couldn't make it two steps without finding something to argue about! Over the course of three days we'd argued whether or not it could snow in new-leaf, whether or not squirrels were in the same family as mice, the many differences between frogs and toads, and why I was an "accident just waiting to happen" and why she "sucked the fun out of everything and anything".

Owlclaw was running out of excuses to end our training sessions early. Ivytail was ready to rip both of our throats out and leave the flesh for the ravens.

Scorchfur thought I should try harder to get along with Dawnpelt; be a little more lenient with her job description. "I mean, how would you feel if your positions were reversed? You would be pretty upset, wouldn't you?"

Smokefoot thought I was an idiot for agreeing to let her help me in the first place. "You're an idiot."

It was an intense couple of days.

And of course I still had my deputy duties to to attend to, which were stressful enough on their own. It didn't help that I was constantly looking over my shoulder for Rownstar, just waiting for him to jump out at me and exclaim, "Crowfrost, I'm replacing you with Ferretclaw!"

Speaking of Ferretclaw. Guess who I had the _pleasure_ of conversing with before I left to lead a dawn hunting patrol?

"Ferretclaw, _stop following me_!"

"But I want to come hunting with you!" Ferretclaw whined. I halted and inhaled deeply, before I turned around to look the troublesome warrior in the eye.

"Ferretclaw, my patrol already has five cats. I am not leading a six cat hunting patrol."

"That's okay, I'll lead it for you!"

I lashed my tail. "Dang it Ferretclaw, no! I don't care if you wanted to fly to the moonpool, and StarClan granted you the wings to do it, _no_!"

Ferretclaw gasped and his blue eyes widened. _Finally, I've gotten through to him!_ "I would never fly to the moonpool! Not if StarClan didn't grant you wings as well!"

"Why are you so obsessed with me?!" I demanded.

"I'm not obsessed with you," Ferretclaw protested. "I'm just super-duper incredibility loyal to the one true leader of ShadowClan; you! Who needs Rowanstar anyways?" My eyes started to widen as Ferretclaw went on. "As a matter of fact, I say we get rid of Rowanstar and make you leader right now!"

"Ferretclaw, shut up!" I hissed, as some of our clanmates started to shoot us curious looks.

"Crowfrost for clan leader! Crowfrost for clan leader!" Ferretclaw chanted, only gaining us even more attention and strange looks. "Crowfrost for clan leader!"

I quickly scanned the camp for Rowanstar and prayed to StarClan that he wasn't in camp to hear Ferretclaw's rambling. "Chant something else!" I whispered fiercely to the cream and gray tom.

"Well alright. DOWN WITH ROWANSTAR! DOWN WITH ROWANSTAR!"

My pale blue orbs widened with terror. "That's not what I-"

" **DEATH TO ROWANSTAR! DEATH TO ROWANSTAR**!"

" _Shut-up_!" I screeched as I launched myself at the chanting warrior.

Ferretclaw yelped as he crumbled from beneath me, but it wasn't enough to simply have him pinned. The lizard-brain _kept. on. chanting_.

So I resorted to a new method. I started to see how much of my paw would fit in Ferretclaw's mouth.

" _Ahem._ " I froze when someone cleared their throat behind me. Without even glancing back I knew it was Rowanstar.

My paw slipped off of Ferretclaw's mouth long enough for him to exclaim, "Death to Rowanstar!"

With a heavy sigh I hung my head. Sometimes it was _stupidly hard_ being me.

 **Dawn Frost**

When I woke up the next morning I didn't expect to find Dawnpelt waiting on me.

"What, decide I don't see enough of you as it is?" I asked her dryly.

I expected a sharp retort or, at the very least, for her to insult me. I didn't expect for her to inhale deeply and say, "I'll back off if you loosen up."

I raised an eyebrow, not quite following. "Excuse me? I'm pretty sure you need to back off _and_ loosen up. I'm already laid-back enough."

She rolled her eyes. "Not in general. I mean in Hailpaw's training."

I blinked, taken back. Was she being serious?

The creamy-colored she-cat went on. "We're not making any progress with him, while Cloverpaw and Honeypaw have already gotten the hang of the hunting crouch and are practicing moving forward." she frowned. "I know you don't like that I'm so close to him, but I _know_ him, and the fact that he still can't properly execute the hunter's crouch bothers him. So, for Hailpaw's sake, I'll back off so that he isn't trying to obey both of our orders."

Someone claw me because I must be dreaming.

"But," Dawnpelt said quickly. "I'll only back off if you promise to stop being so harsh on him."

I frowned. "What do you consider harsh, me looking at him? I never say anything to him, except when I'm giving him orders. Not even inside camp!" I scoffed, "Heck, I talk to Cloverpaw more than I do Hailpaw!" Not by choice, of course. Cloverpaw was so talkative, she could probably keep a conversation going with a pine cone.

"Exactly," Dawnpelt meowed, much to my surprise. "Crowfrost, you're one of the most social cats in the clan, and yet you won't even glance at Hailpaw unless you have to. When you tell him to do something you do it with as little description as possible. And Hailpaw isn't an idiot - he knows how you feel about Dark Forest trainees." her hazel eyes hardened. "He knows how you feel about Ratscar, Pinenose, and his littermates.

"He thinks you ignore him because of his parents mistakes. "

"He isn't wrong," I replied instantly.

Dawnpelt shook her head. "He's a six moon old apprentice. Training is stressful enough, he doesn't need that knowledge weighing down on him too."

I exhaled loudly. "Well what would you like me to do about it, Dawnpelt?"

Frustration flared in the she-cat's eyes. "Why do you sound so helpless, Crowfrost? I'm not asking you to become his best friend, I'm not asking you to form some unbreakable bond with him, I'm not even asking you to treat him like other mentors treat their apprentices. I'm just asking that you stop making it so obvious that you loathe him! Just talk to him a little more! You-"

"Alright, I get it!" I snapped, cutting her off before her ramble turned into a lecture. "I'll put more words into my sentences!"

" _Thank you_ ," Dawnpelt replied, just as sarcastic as I had been.

I resisted the urge to sneer at her, instead flicking my ear impatiently and asking, "Is that all, or would you like to discuss any more problems you have with me?"

Dawnpelt snorted. "Oh, please. We'd be here for days if we were doing that." I rolled my eyes. "No, I'm going back to my warm nest to sleep a while longer." And with that she stood up and padded off towards the Warriors Den, tail swishing calmly behind her. Part of me wanted to behave like a kit and pounce on her tail, if only to get a reaction out of her, but the slightly more mature part of me prompted me to shake my head. If I didn't go now then I would never have enough time to finish my walk.

As I walked through the pine forest I thought about my conversation with Dawnpelt. I wondered if she would really be able to step back and give me more control, and resist the urge to argue with me over stupid things that didn't matter.

I guess I would find out.

 **Dawn Frost**

"Crouch down a little further… there you go!" I managed to grin at the young apprentice, although it was undoubtedly forced. But thanks to skill and raw talent it looked just as natural as a rabbit on the moor, or the sun in the sky.

Hailpaw didn't even blink.

Killjoy. It's clear he spent time with Dawnpelt as a kit. Speaking of everyone's favorite nag, she was doing surprisingly well at backing off. She stood to my side and, for the most part, kept her jaws clamped shut. She offered a suggestion every now and then because I certainly wasn't going to ask for it, but still. It was much more peaceful than usual.

"Lookin' good, Hailpaw!" Cloverpaw called over her shoulder, where she was slowly stalking forward. Or, at least, she was supposed to be going slowly. She was actually moving quite quickly and in turn, stepping on every pine needle and every pine cone on the forest floor. Honeypaw wasn't having much luck either; her gaze was constantly drifting away from her target (a large stone) and she'd ran into a pine tree twice now.

"Focus, Cloverpaw," Owlclaw gently scolded his apprentice. My whiskers twitched; Owlclaw was doing a much better job at being patient with his apprentice than Ivytail was. I thought she was going to tackle Honeypaw the second time she run into a tree.

I examined Hailpaw's stance once more. He actually looked pretty good; it didn't seem like hunting would come naturally to him, but it hadn't come very naturally to me either (not that I would ever admit it). But looking at the way he was built, I doubted that fight techniques would come as easily to him as they did to me when I was his age. A frown creased my brow; _maybe his talents are more mental than physical?_

"Am I doing something wrong?" Hailpaw asked, upon noticing my expression.

I shook my head and forced another grin. "Nope, I think you've got it nailed!" Hailpaw's aloof expression still didn't waver. I shoved down my irritation and went to command that he start stalking forward, when a _certain someone_ cleared their throat, interrupting my thoughts. I glanced at the creamy-colored she-cat beside me and rolled my eyes. "Alright Dawnpelt, what do you have-"

"Lower your tail!" Dawnpelt exclaimed, as if she'd been waiting ages for me to ask for her opinion or something. _Oh, wait…_ Oops. "Your tail should be level with the rest of your body."

I frowned. "His tail _is_ level."

But Dawnpelt shook her head. "It's still a bit too high. Just a _little lower_ and… perfect," she said, a smile warming her features.

I rolled my eyes again. _Perfectionist._

I looked back at Hailpaw and was taken back whem I noticed his expression had shifted; his lips had widened into a small smile and a pleased glint shone in his dark blue eyes. Granted it wasn't a huge change, but it was still more than he'd ever shown me.

It took everything in me not to growl or make a snide comment. _I don't get it. I'm ShadowClan's deputy - I'm one of the most important cats in the entire clan! Heck, I'm one of the most important cats in all of the clans!_ There were only four deputies, after all. _So why does a regular warrior's opinion matter more to Hailpaw than mine._ This apprentice made absolutely no sense.

"Lesson's over," I said crisply, a frown still threatening to overtake my grin. There was only so much I was willing to force my pride to endure.

The pleased glint in Hailpaw's eyes faded. "But I'm not tired yet. Can't I practice stalking forward?" his eyes darted towards Cloverpaw and Honeypaw, and I realized that Dawnpelt was right ( _ugh_!); Hailpaw really didn't like that his sisters were further ahead in their training than he was.

The fact that it was my fault he was so behind because I couldn't stop argueing probably should have made me feel guilty, but I didn't. But I didn't feel satisfied either; I was annoyed. If those arguments were between myself and Dawnpelt than why did he still look up to her?

"We're ending this session on a high note," I replied, my tone steely and leaving no room for debate. Hailpaw lowered his gaze and I thought I detected a trace of frustration. Well, at least I was capable of evoking _some sort_ of emotion from the young tom.

"Owlclaw, Ivytail!" I called, successfully gaining the other mentors' attention, as well as Honeypaw, which resulted in her stalking straight into another pine tree. I didn't even attempt to mask my smirk when Ivytail gritted her teeth tightly together, the picture of shoved-down exasperation. "Ready to head back?"

"Yes," Ivytail immediately replied. "I've handled enough foolishness today; any more and I'll kill someone." I laughed because I knew she meant it; the frightened expression that flashed across Honeypaw's features suggested that she did too.

Owlclaw looked amused but didn't comment on Ivytail's indirect threat. "Yeah, I think Cloverpaw's ready too." Cloverpaw protested that she was _not_ ready to head back, that she could keep going for _hours_ , but the yawn that slipped past her jaws indicated otherwise.

Soon we were on the path back to camp, with myself in the lead per usual, while the others followed behind in pairs and conversed amongst themselves. However, unlike normal, Cloverpaw broke apart from her group and appeared at my side. _Oh StarClan, give me strength._

"Hey Crowfrost," the she-cat exclaimed, as she practically bounced by my side. "Did you watch me today?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Uh… no. I was working with Hailpaw, remember?"

"Well yeah," Cloverpaw started. "But you didn't even glance at me?"

I shook my head. "Nope, not really." I paused and regarded the apprentice wearily. "Why?"

Cloverpaw huffed. "Because you're the clan deputy! You're, like, the most important cat in ShadowClan!" _Finally! Someone who understood the value of my rank!_ "Well, maybe not the most important cat; Rownstar's most important. But Hailpaw says that Littlecloud's the second most important cat because he's the medicine cat and apparently they're super important or something-" _Okay, I've had my ego stroked, I'm good, now someone please reign her back!_ "And Honeypaw says that Ratscar and Pinenose are both really important cats because they're our parents, but," she shot me a smile so large I was surprised it fit on her face, "I think _you're_ the second most important cat."

"Is that so?" I mused, and wondered if Owlclaw knew his chatty apprentice had disappeared from his side. He usually kept her from annoying me for too long.

"Yep!" Cloverpaw cheerfully replied. "I mean, you could be a medicine cat if you wanted to, so it's not like Littlecloud has some special skill that you don't. And Littlecloud is too wishy washy to be a deputy, so you could do his job and he couldn't do yours, which makes you better, which makes you more important."

"I'm… not sure that's how it works," I hesitantly replied, although I did appreciate the thought.

Cloverpaw flicked her tail, undeterred by my lack of enthusiasm. "Well, _I_ think that's how it works." She glanced back at me and tilted her head curiously.

"So who do you think is the most important cat in the clan?"

I shrugged, in hopes that Cloverpaw would eventually find me boring and look for a new victim to torture-er, I mean, _a new friend to converse with_. But her owlish eyes didn't stray away from me as she waited for a vocal response, and finally I sighed. "Well, Rowanstar, obviously. He's the clan leader."

"Do you think you'll be the clan leader someday?" the dark gray she-cat prompted.

A wistful expression played across my features, as I thought about how being the clan leader was all I used to think about. As a kit, an apprentice, and a younger, but just as ambitious warrior. I remembered how thrilled I'd been when Rowanstar chose me to be his deputy, and one day, his successor. The dream to become the leader of ShadowClan was less thought about now that I had so many duties, but it had never faded. "I hope so," came my response.

Cloverpaw stared at me for a second, and I felt like I was being analyzed. Finally she said, "I think you'd make a good leader."

I don't know why her remark surprised me. Obviously I would make a good leader, otherwise Rowanstar would never have chosen me to be his deputy. But… still. The fact that the kit of two Dark Forest trainees thought I would do well with the powerful position caught me off guard. _Maybe she hasn't noticed my resentment to her parents, or the others._

"Hey Cloverpaw!" Honeypaw called. "I'll race you back to camp!"

Immediately Cloverpaw seemed to forget about my presence, for a competitive gleam sparked in her eyes, and a daring grin spread across her lips. "Last one to camp is crowfood!" Without waiting for Honeypaw's response the dark gray she-cat was off like a shot, racing so sure-footedly through the pine forest that even I had to be impressed. She was confident, I would give her that.

"Hey!" Honeypaw protested, although she was quick to follow her sister. "Cheater, no one said 'go'!"

The others chuckled, amused by the she-cats antics, although I remained silent. After a second I glanced back and blinked; Hailpaw was staring at me with an unexpected intensity in his dark blue eyes. I frowned lightly and a moment later he looked away, embarrassed to be caught staring. I snorted and shook my head, and returned my attention to the path. _Strange cat. Maybe I should introduce him to Ferretclaw._

Soon the camp came into view, and I paused at the entrance, letting the others enter camp ahead of me. First Ivytail, then Owlclaw, and then Hailpaw. Hailpaw made a point not to make eye contact with me, although I wasn't particularly offended. Besides, it wasn't him that I was waiting for.

"Well, I tried," I said dryly, as Dawnpelt brought up the rear of the patrol.

She snorted. "What do you want me to do, congratulate you?"

"It'd be nice."

The hazel-eyed she-cat rolled her eyes. " _Congratulations_. I'm _so proud_ of you for attempting to talk to your apprentice."

I narrowed my eyes. "I could've done without the sarcasm, but thanks. Not that Hailpaw acted any differently."

Dawnpelt shrugged. "He's more reserved than you are; give him some time and eventually he'll warm up to you." _Eventually._ Well, eventually was fine with me. I didn't really care if Hailpaw ever warmed up to me.

"Did I do well?" the question caught me off guard, and I blinked dumbly as Dawnpelt shuffled her paws, clearly uncomfortable. Finally I realized that she was referring to her behavior during the training session.

"Oh! Uh, you…" I trailed off, unsure of what to say. I was used to insulting the she-cat, and telling her what she did wrong; not _complimenting her_ and telling her what she'd done _right._ "You… you did."

Dawnpelt raised an eyebrow, confused. "I… did?"

"You did well," I rushed on, trying to make sense of the response that even I didn't really understand. "You, uh, were less annoying than usual."

Dawnpelt's confusion shifted to dry bemusement. "Oh. Thanks."

Annoyance bubbled in the pit of my stomach and a harsh frown played across my lips. "Well what did you expect me to say?" I demanded. "It was a stupid question!"

The creamy-colored warrior rolled her eyes. "Never mind, just forget I even asked." And then, without waiting for my response, she shoved _rudely_ past me and into the camp.

"I take that back!" I called after her, determined to have the last word. "You did _horrible_ today!" A lash of her tail was the only sort of acknowledgment I received. Well, from Dawnpelt, at least. A couple of our clanmates shot me strange glances, although they quickly looked away when I focused my cold blue eyes on them.

 _Ugh, I need someone to complain to._ So naturally I went searching for Scorchfur and Smokefoot, who didn't particularly enjoy listening to me ramble on, but would tolerate it.

I found Scorchfur quite easily; he was in the nursery with Snowbird, and was lecturing her about being out and about when she was so close to giving birth. I rolled my eyes because Snowbird still had a couple moons before her kits were due and everyone knew it, but ultimately decided that if I tried interrupting Scorchfur while he was in one of his "moods", it would only backfire, and I would be forced to listen to _him complain_ , instead of vice versa. So, Smokefoot it was.

I didn't see my smokey-black partner-in-crime lazing around camp anywhere, so I decided to check the Elder's Den, although it was unusual for him to retire to his nest so early. ShadowClan were night-owls, and not only that, but Smokefoot hated to be confined to camp all day; he hated being confined to a den even less.

I brushed past the a few of the other elders who, when questioned, claimed to be unaware of Smokefoot's whereabouts. _He must be in the den._ But when I stuck my head inside the Elders Den I was disappointed; all of the nests were empty.

Well. _Almost_ all of them.

"Finally come to visit me, have you?" a voice croaked, and on instinct my muzzle curled with distaste. "Now Crowfrost," Kinkfur childed me as she stood shakily to her paws. "Is that any way to greet your mother?"

"I'm not here to talk to you, I'm looking for Smokefoot," I said bluntly, my tone near emotionless. "Seen him?"

Kinkfur sighed heavily, as if I'd just delivered devastating news. It was all an act of course, but Kinkfur always had been rather dramatic; I guess I knew where I got _that_ gene from. "I can't believe my _only kit_ would treat me so coldly." she looked up, and cold blue eyes met murky green ones. "What happened to the kit that used to be so full of love and affection?"

"He grew up," I immediately replied. "When his mother abandoned him, he learned to fend for himself."

" _Abandoned_!" Kinkfur spat, like the word was crowfood in her mouth. "Abandoned is such a strong word!"

"Not strong enough," I retorted, and flicked an ear. "Have you seen Smokefoot or not?"

The unkept tabby elder regarded me almost curiously for a second when I didn't pursue our argument, before she shrugged her scrawny shoulders. "Littlecloud allowed him to leave camp today. I would assume he's still out, trying to make the most of his time."

My tail shot up. "Littlecloud let him leave?" I echoed. " _Alone_?!"

"No, not alone," Kinkfur said with a shake of her head. My eyes narrowed when she grinned cruelly, yellow fangs poking out of her mouth. "He sent that pretty brown she-cat with him."

 _Pretty brown she-cat?_ That's… "Applefur?" I gasped. "He sent a Dark Forest trainee to escort him?! Great StarClan, why not just send a group of adders, or a rabid badger?!"

The sound that escaped Kinkfur's lips could hardly be called a laugh; a cackle, maybe. "A deputy who loaths his clanmates!" she cried. "Have you ever heard of such a thing?!"

"They deserve it," I growled, my black and white fur bristling along my spine. "They betrayed their clan!"

"They fought beside the clans in the end!"

"But they trained against them when it counted," I retorted. "A Dark Forest trainee is responsible for Smokefoot's injury in the first place. I won't let another one be responsible for his death." And with that I whirled around and marched out of the den, the sound of Kinkfur's crazed laughter following me out.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **Marvel or DC superheros?**

 **#Marvel FTW**

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 **Ta-da! I was really hoping to get this chapter out on Valentine's Day, but alas, none of my plans ever seem to go as I hope. So this was three days late. But it's the thought that counts, right? So, happy late Valentine's Day, guys! If you have that special person in your lives then I hope your day was perfect, and if you're still looking for that person, don't give up hope! They'll show up eventually :)**

 **I actually wasn't planning to end the chapter here; I had one more scene I wanted to add. But I really liked how the scene with Kinkfur (CROWFROST'S MOTHER!) ended, and I couldn't bring myself to add onto it anymore. Just for the record, I have _no idea_ who Crowfrost's mother is. The Erins haven't mentioned it, so I scrolled through the Warriors Wikia until I found a cat who _could_ be his mother, but probably isn't. So don't cite me on that! **

**Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	5. Part 1 - The Broken and The Bruised

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

* * *

 **Chapter Five - Part One - The Broken and the Bruised**

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 **"Don't forget, a person's greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated." - H. Jackson Brown**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

Before most cats meet me, I think they assume that I'm a friendly, out-going, bubbly she-cat.

Then they meet me.

Truth be told I'm stubborn, not incredibly social, and I can come across as hostile without trying to. I don't go out of my way to befriend cats at Gatherings. I'd rather have a small group of good, close friends than a large group of cats who only hang around for my status or my looks. Of course, as the daughter of a clan leader, I do often have to plaster on a smile and suffer through incompetent company. Mostly toms who think they have a shot with me, or she-cats who want to giggle and gossip about _a certain ShadowClan deputy_.

No, out of the two of us, Olivenose is _definitely_ the more friendly, social one. We balance each out out nicely and most of the time she's wonderful and helps me get out of those types of situations (the ones with the lizard-brained toms and brain _less_ she-cats), but she does occasionally force me to socialize with others. Like now, for instance.

"That was a really great catch you made back there, Olivenose," Applefur said to the tortoiseshell she-cat.

Olivenose puffed her chest out proudly as a rather large toad hung in her jaws. " _Thanks_ ," she meowed. "I didn't think I was going to catch it at first, but," she shrugged. "Prey is dumb. It just… _stopped_ in the middle of the clearing."

"It's almost like it was begging to be caught," Applefur agreed.

Now, I don't have problem with Applefur. I don't resent her for training in the Dark Forest (unlike some cats who shall go unnamed), and for the most part she's friendly and happy to help in anyway she can.

It's _Grassheart_ I can't stand.

"I think there's a lizard over in that bush!" she exclaimed, shrilly.

I resisted the urge to growl as I shoved past the she-cat, and said, "Well if there _was_ one then it's gone now." Grassheart shot me a dirty look (which I gladly returned) before she fell back and started a conversation with Applefur. Likewise Olivenose frowned and sped up to pad beside me.

"Look, I know you don't love hunting in groups-"

"It's not that I'm in a group," I growled softly. "I like you and Applefur just fine. It's _Grassheart_ I can't stand!"

Olivenose glanced back at the two she-cats, who were seemingly oblivious to our conversation. "I admit, she can be a bit much sometimes, but she's a nice cat, honestly."

I snorted in disbelief. "Are you serious? She's like the ShadowClan version of Cherryleaf!"

Olivenose wrinkled her nose at the mention of Cherryleaf, an annoying young ThunderClan she-cat who gossiped more than a pregnant queen and for whatever reason, held a grudge against myself and Olivenose. Of course we were completely fine with her not liking us, but we were _not_ fine when she went around spreading lies about us. One time she managed to convince her clanmates that she'd seen us on their territory, stealing prey. Needless to say, when the next Gathering approached we weren't thrilled to see her. It took three warriors to pull the her and Olivenose apart. It would have taken more if I'd been involved, but unfortunately I had an image to maintain. Clan leader's daughter and all.

"That's just mean," Olivenose murmured. "No one should be compared to Cherryleaf!" The tortoiseshell she-cat shook her head. "Whatever. Back to Grassheart, can you at least pretend you don't want to claw her eyes out?"

"I-..." I trailed off and couldn't help the sheepish smile that played across my lips. "Is it that obvious?"

Olivenose grinned in return. "Yeah, it's pretty bad. You-" suddenly she stopped talking and gestured wildly to the path in front of us. I followed her gaze and my ears perked up when I spotted a blue-tailed lizard, sitting patiently on a log, basking in the sunlight. It looked so peaceful that I almost didn't want to disturb it, but there was no way I could pass up a blue-tailed lizard.

I got into the hunter's crouch and started to slowly stalk forward, conscious of the pine cones and needles around my paws. _Just a few more steps, and… now!_ I sprung forward and landed squarely on the lizard. I quickly ended its life with a swift nip to the neck, and the creature fell limp. I picked it up in my jaws and turned to face my patrol, proudly.

"Good job," Olivenose remarked.

Applefur eyed it appreciatively. "The blue-tailed ones are the best."

Grassheart simply sniffed and turned her head.

Life was good.

 **Dawn Frost**

"Are you guys almost ready to head back?" I asked, as we wandered aimlessly through the territory. The sun had started to set, and soon dusk would be upon us.

"Not just yet," Grassheart immediately replied. "I _still_ haven't caught anything!"

"Maybe if you'd stop talking so much then you would," Olivenose murmured. I shot my friend a surprised glance and she huffed loudly. "Ever since you compared her to Cherryleaf, everything she says annoys me!"

I purred softly and nudged her. "Welcome to my world," I murmured back.

"Whenever you guys are ready is fine with me," Applefur said between the frog in her jaws. "Besides, you probably have to get back soon, don't you, Dawnpelt?"

I blinked my hazel orbs and glanced back at the mottled brown she-cat. "Not really. Why?"

Applefur frowned lightly. "Aren't you and Crowfrost taking Hailpaw out tonight? He told Smokefoot that he wanted to introduce him to night-hunting soon." It was a casual question, but all the same, my heart stopped beating when Applefur asked it.

"I-I don't think we are," I said uncertainly, cursing myself when my voice wavered. "He didn't say anything to me about it."

"Oh. Well, ignore me then," Applefur said with a shrug. "Maybe he didn't say it was tonight after all."

"Yeah… he must have meant a different night," I murmured, as I waited for my heart-rate to slow down to normal. _Get a grip on yourself, Dawnpelt! Every ShadowClan apprentice goes through night-training, and that includes Hailpaw. It's nothing special._

No, nothing about it was special.

I jolted when Olivenose nudged my shoulder. I looked and her and noticed that concern had pooled in her bright green eyes. "Hey, are you okay?" she whispered. "You looked like a mouse cornered on the thunderpath."

I managed to shoot my friend a weak smile. "I'm fine. It's just… Crowfrost… night-training…" I waited for Olivenose to catch on, and when she did her eyes widened.

"I didn't even think about that," she breathed. "Are you going to still help him with it?"

I shrugged helplessly. "I'll have to. I can't just back out. Besides," I plastered on another weak smile. "That was ages ago, back when I was still an apprentice. I'm… _mostly_ over it now."

Olivenose didn't appear convinced, but she couldn't press the subject anymore. Just then Grassheart bounced towards us (still without any prey) and exclaimed, "Hey, Dawnpelt! Speaking of Crowfrost, how's that going?"

I wasn't fooled for two heart-beats. Any cat with a functioning brain could detect the gossip-hungry look in Grassheart's pale green eyes, and the smile on her lips that couldn't possibly be sincere. _Ah, and so it begins._ Frankly I was amazed that I made it this long without being interrogated by Crowfrost fans.

I shrugged nonchalantly and said, "It's going well. Hailpaw picks everything up really quickly, and is eager to learn more."

"He always did seem to be the most interested in learning techniques," Applefur remarked, as she set her frog down to lick a couple pieces of stray fur. "Cloverpaw and Honeypaw were too rowdy, but Hailpaw looked like he was trying to memorize your every movement." I shot Applefur a smile and nodded.

Meanwhile, Grassheart didn't seem satisfied with my response. "I wasn't talking about _Hailpaw's training._ I meant, what's it like to work with _Crowfrost_?" _I knew what you meant, you gossip-hungry vixen!_

Applefur twitched her whiskers, curious as well. "You and Crowfrost have never gotten along, have you?"

When even Olivenose, Ferretclaw's competition as Crowfrost's number one fan, looked at me with curiosity shining in her eyes, I sighed softly in defeat. "That's an understatement. We… we got off on a really rocky start, but we're trying a few new methods and they seem to be helping our relationship."

" _Relationship_?!" Grassheart shrieked. Well, if she really did want to catch any prey, she's scared it all off now.

" _Partnership_ ," I growled. "I meant our _partnership_."

"Oh," Grassheart breathed softly. To her credit, at least she had the decency to look sheepish. Maybe she wasn't _as bad_ as Cherryleaf after all.

"So, you two are getting along?" Applefur asked, and a genuine smile played across my lips when I saw how strained hers was. Clearly she wasn't favoring the young she-cat either.

I shrugged. "Not quite getting along yet, but we can tolerate each other's presence most of the time." The she-cats laughed as if I'd told a joke, and I smiled because they didn't understand how honest I was.

"What about-" Suddenly Olivenose paused, and she narrowed her green eyes. "Hold on, did you guys hear that?" she angled her towards the east and we followed her lead. Sure enough, when we were all silent, I could hear voices. One voice I recognized almost instantly; _Crowfrost._

"Come on," Olivenose whispered, and slowly stalked forward towards the voices. I wasn't a fan on invading other's privacy, but I found myself grinning and following suite. Grassheart took absolutely no convincing whatsoever, however Applefur didn't look convinced.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" she asked. "Invading their privacy?" When I glanced back and saw the uncertainty on the she-cat's features, I realized why she looked so reluctant. She trained in the Dark Forest, and Crowfrost despised her for it. As a matter of fact, I'd overheard that he went out of his way to make her feel left-out just the other day. Olivenose, who loved her share of gossip, said she thought it was because Littlecloud had asked her to take Smokefoot out instead of him.

I shot the tabby she-cat a kind smile. "Crowfrost invades the privacy of others all the time. Consider this payback." When put like that Applefur couldn't refuse. She smiled a little and joined us in our childish antics, and soon we were all giggling softly. "We probably look ridiculous," I whispered to Olivenose.

"I'm just glad you joined in, instead of lecturing us about how we shouldn't act like kits," Olivenose whispered back, and grinned coyly when I shot her a half-hearted glare.

" _Shh_!" Grassheart hissed, as we approached the edge of the clearing. The land dipped below us, giving us just enough coverage to go unseen. We crouched down beneath some holly bushes, and waited. Sure enough, just a few seconds later, a group of cats emerged. I instantly recognized Crowfrost, Smokefoot, and Scorchfur.

"I'm telling you, there's no rabbit in ShadowClan!" Smokefoot exclaimed. "Starlingwing and Waspstripe just made the story up to impress she-cats."

To my right, Applefur growled in annoyance. "What is he doing out of camp? Littlecloud told him he couldn't leave for at least two more days!"

Scorchfur shot Crowfrost a curious look. "If there is a rabbit, then why are you so determined to find it? You're the deputy. If you don't want to go on a dawn patrol than don't."

"That's exactly why I'm looking for it!" Crowfrost replied. "If there is one and I catch it, then the reward won't matter. Think about how annoyed the clan is going to be!"

Scorchfur eyed his friend wearily. "Crowfrost, I think you abuse your position as deputy." _Yes, yes he does!_

"For the last time, there isn't a-" Smokefoot was interrupted when a toad croaked and hopped past him. For a moment I thought he was going to give chase, but instead he simply watched it idly.

Scorchfur looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "What? Lose your appetite for toads?"

Smokefoot shrugged helplessly. "Can't hunt; Littlecloud's orders. He doesn't want me to get too excited and speed up my heart rate."

A sympathetic frown tugged at my lips. I couldn't imagine not being able to hunt, or to fight, or to run. I would feel like I'd lost my life's purpose.

Crowfrost nudged Smokefoot's shoulder playfully. "Hey, at least we're all friends here, and we won't judge you for letting prey escape. Now, if _Dawnpelt_ were with us…" My heart skipped a beat purely out of surprise. _Me?_ I felt the others' gazes shift in my direction. "She would _definitely_ lecture you."

The black and white tom broke away from his friends and started padding in front of them in a haughty manner. " _Smokefoot_ ," he started in a shrill and annoying tone. "I can't _believe_ you just let _a toad_ hop past you. You _know_ that leaf-bare is upon us, and the clan _needs_ to be _fed_!"

A frown quickly spread across my lips. _He's mocking me?!_

Smokefoot seemed to catch on, and grinned. "But _Dawnpelt,_ " he started, with a mock pain-filled moan. "Littlecloud says I can't hunt very often! If I give chase and get too excited, I won't be able to breathe properly!"

Crowfrost stuck his nose in the air and sniffed. "Well you should have considered that _before_ you decided to leave camp. If you knew you couldn't hunt then you shouldn't have left at all! Being injured is _not_ an acceptable excuse for letting prey get away!"

A silent gasp escaped my lips. _Is that… really how he sees me? I'm not nearly that cruel!_

Crowfrost and Smokefoot erupted into a bout of laughter, but Scorchfur eyed his friends wearily. "That isn't really what you think Dawnpelt would say, is it? I mean… that might be a bit extreme, Crowfrost."

"It sounded pretty spot on to me," Smokefoot said with a shrug.

A chuckle slipped past Crowfrost's lips, before he replied, "It's _Dawnpelt_ , Scorchfur. She's a pretty extreme she-cat already. And, come on," he continued, as he nudged the other tom playfully. "You know how serious she takes _everything_. That toad could have hopped past a _newborn kit_ and she _still_ would have scolded it." His voice rose to the shrill tone that he had been mocking me in only moments ago. "I don't care if you _just_ opened your eyes - that's no excuse for letting prey escape! Why didn't you chase it? Why aren't you _as perfect as I am_?"

Uncontrollable tears welled up in my eyes when both Crowfrost and Smokefoot howled with laughter. Olivenose noticed and gasped quietly. "Dawnpelt, don't-" But I'd just faced enough humiliation for one day; I wasn't going to stick around and listen to Crowfrost make a mockery out of me any longer.

Before anyone could stop me, I stood to my paws and raced back to camp.

 **Dawn Frost**

I'd planned on darting into camp, curling up in my nest, and pretending that my feelings weren't hurt. I didn't plan on running into Tigerheart, and letting him convince me to take a walk with him and tell him why tears were streaming quietly down my face. But fate, I realized, never went according to anyone's' plans.

Tigerheart was a good brother. He didn't ask questions and try to get my mind off of what I'd heard; as a matter of fact, the brushing of our pelts was the only reminder that he was even there. He knew that I would speak up whenever I was ready.

"The sun's going to start setting at any moment," Tigerheart remarked casually, after we'd been walking for some time. He focused his amber gaze on me and asked, "Wanna watch it together?"

I hesitated. At one point in time, watching the sunset was something that Tigerheart, Flametail and I did together. Tigerheart and I hadn't watched the sunset together ever since Flametail-...

"Sure," I replied softly. "Why not?"

The bulky brute shot me a grin and simultaneously, we started in the direction of our favorite spot. It wasn't very far off and we arrived just in time to watch the sun start to descend behind the mountains. The sky swirled with varying colors of deep orange and tints of pink and purple. "Pretty," I commented.

"I miss watching it," Tigerheart meowed. "You know, we haven't watched it together since…"

I squeezed my eyes shut. "Yeah. I know."

We were both silent for a few heart-beats, and then Tigerheart started softly, "When Littlecloud and Tawnypelt burst into camp and announced that you fell in the lake, I thought I was going to lose you too."

I chuckled dryly as I leaned against Tigerheart's body. "You and me both. The more I think about it, the scarier it seems. I honestly can't believe that I'm still alive."

The dark brown tabby tom didn't immediately reply. "It was that bad?" he finally asked. "You were scared?"

"Terrorfied," I replied.

Tigerheart exhaled, softly and shakily. "So Flametail spent his last moments in fear and panic."

I cringed, but there was no way I could deny it. "Yeah," I replied quietly. Neither one of us spoke after that. Our gazes were trained sternly on the sunset, but I don't think either of us were actually paying attention to the beautiful display. Tigerheart was mulling over what I'd just told him, and I was thinking about my experience in the lake.

I knew Flametail's voice. I knew it just as well as I knew my own voice. And I knew what I heard when I was drowning; Flametail held a grudge against me for not being able to save him. He hated me, just like Crowfrost. _What if… what if they're right to hate me?_ I wondered. _Am I really that horrible?_

"Hey, Stripes," I started hesitantly. "Can I… ask you a question?"

The dull gleam in Tigerheart's amber eyes almost made me reconsider, but I had to ask _someone_. "Hm? Oh, sure."

"Do you promise to be totally honest?" I asked. That seemed to catch his attention.

Curiosity and concern replaced the dull gleam in his eyes as he turned to face me. "Of course; I wouldn't lie to you."

I inhaled a soft breath, inwardly gathering my nerves. "I'm not… do you think I'm horrible?"

The question caught him off guard. "What?" he asked, even though we both knew he heard my perfectly.

I shuffled my paws against the marshy ground. "When I was drowning I… I heard Flametail's voice. He sounded bitter, and he said it was my time to join StarClan. He said it was ironic that he couldn't save me, just like how I couldn't save him."

A series of emotions flashed across Tigerheart's face, starting with disbelief and ending with anguish. "Oh, Dusk, that's not-"

"And then, today," I rushed on, desperate to further explain myself. "I was hunting with Olivenose and some others, and we overheard Crowfrost and his friends hunting, and-" I tried to shove down the emotion that clogged my throat. "S-Smokefoot let a toad escape, and then Crowfrost started mocking me and,-" It was too much. Tears started streaming down my face once more, and a sob shook my shoulders. "T-Tigerheart, he made me sound _horrible_! He m-made me sound _h-heartless_ , and _cruel_ , and then Scorchfur-"

"Shhh," Tigerheart whispered, as he interrupted my rambling. He pressed his pelt against mine and I buried my head in his shoulder, and continued to cry freely. Shame ate at my mind for appearing so fragile when I'd worked so hard to look strong, but I'd hit my breaking point.

It was so _frustrating_ ; I worked so hard to not let anything get to me, and to be the best warrior I could possibly be, and it was _Crowfrost_ who made me cry. And I _hated_ him for it. I hated him for mocking me, for making me cry, and I hated him for making me face reality. Because when I was faced with reality, I had to accept the fact that I wasn't nearly as strong as I pretended to be.

Tigerheart rasped his tongue over my head, like how a mother soothed a kit. "Dawnpelt, you can't take what Crowfrost said to heart. You two have never gotten along; of course he made you sound terrible."

"B-but what about Flametail?" I cried softly. "What about wh-what he said?"

The dark brown tabby heasiated. "I… I don't know what to say about that. That doesn't sound like Flametail at all; you know he wasn't one to hold grudges!"

"But I know what I heard!" I protested.

Tigerheart _shushed_ me again. "Listen, Dusk. I don't know what you heard when you fell into the lake, but you know our brother just as well as I do, and you know that he loved you. He would never _let_ you drown. Maybe you didn't really hear Flametail? Maybe it was just the lack of oxygen getting to your head?"

I went to respond but a hiccup interrupted me. Tigerheart took that as a sign to continue.

"You're not a horrible cat by any means, Dusk. You're strong and intelligent and you _do_ care about your clanmates; you just don't let them slack off." He licked the top of my head again. "Everyone knows you're not cruel. Nobody hates you."

By that point I'd stopped crying so much, and started to reign my emotions back in. "Crowfrost hates me," I muttered darkly. "I'm convinced."

"Crowfrost," Tigerheart spat; I was amazed to hear the bitterness in his tone. "Wait until we get back to camp! I'll show him what happens when you make my sister cry!"

I bolted up. "No!" I exclaimed, startling the once-furious tom. "Don't you dare confront him about this!"

The amber-eyed tom frowned. "Dawnpelt, he deserves it! What deputy goes around mocking their clanmates?"

"I don't want him to know I overheard him," I said quickly. "If he knows that we were spying on him, or that he made me cry…" I shook my head as I trailed off. "Great StarClan, if he found out he actually got to me, it would make his day!"

"Just let me-"

"Tigerheart, no," I growled. "I don't want you to talk to him about it." Tigerheart growled softly as he glared off to the side, and I felt my features soften. I laid my tail on his back and said, "But it's nice to know that you would. Thanks for listening to me ramble on, Stripes."

Tigerheart couldn't fight the smile that played across his lips. He flicked my ear with his tail and said, "No problem, Dusk." We grinned and started to stand to our paws when he added, " _Still_. I wish you would let me show him what a fox-heart he was."

I snorted dryly as we started back to camp together. "Trust me; he wouldn't care even if you did."

I wasn't sure how tomorrow would go. I hopped that I would be able to pretend like I hadn't overheard Crowfrost mocking me, and that I would be able to proceed as usual. I hopped that I wouldn't be intimidated by him, and that I would still be ready to challenge him whenever I needed to. A large part of me wanted to cause him the exact same pain he'd caused me. _Maybe I should let Tigerheart yell at him,_ I thought, before dismissing the idea. I'd meant it when I said that Crowfrost wouldn't be effected by the news. He wouldn't feel shame, or guilt, or remorse. _He would probably say it was my own fault for spying on him..._

In those cold, frosty-blue eyes, Crowfrost thought he could do no wrong.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

From the moment I woke up I knew that something was off. The air was full of tension, like the calm before the storm. As soon as I stepped paw out of camp for my routine morning walk, I was immediately on guard, fully prepared for whatever was going to happen. But then... nothing did.

The birds sang their pretty songs.

Lizards and frogs scurried about, and promised a good day of hunting.

It was a surprisingly warm morning, considering leaf-bare was right around the corner.

It was _peaceful._

Then it hit me. I had been expecting something dramatic, like an ambush from ThunderClan or another Dark Forest attack. But maybe I was thinking too big - maybe it was simply going to be an irritating day. Maybe one of my clanmates were going to irritate me. After all in my world, _peace_ promised _stress._

By the time I had returned from my walk I was convinced. Someone was going to irritate me, I would snap at them, and then everything would be fine. There would be no more strange tension in the air, no more glancing over my shoulder every other heart-beat. The day would pick up and carry on as if nothing had happened at all. As a matter of fact, I even had a plan to speed things up a little, so that I wasn't stuck sulking all day until someone managed to make me snap.

It was a very simple plan. All I had to do was irritate one of my clanmates who, in turn, would grumble and complain and then irritate me, and then I would be able to snap at them. And then everything would be normal.

And what better way to irritate someone than to assign them to a dawn patrol?

"Spikefur, lead a border patrol to ThunderClan." I waited for Spikefur, who was among those that hated to be assigned to dawn patrols, to mutter something bitter underneath his breath.

But instead he surprised me by simply responding with, "Sure. Who should I take with me?"

"Um," I stared at the dark brown tom for several long moments before slowly replying, "Take Stoatfur, Waspstripe, Ivytail, and her apprentice." I waited for Ivytail to protest because I knew she hated to be on patrols led by non-senior warriors, but she also surprised me by leaving without a single complaint.

Next I told Tawnypelt to lead a border patrol to RiverClan because I knew she would complain about their fishy-scent, but again, she didn't complain. Instead she called for Ashpaw, and then asked Pinenose and Scorchfur to join her.

 _Alright, there's no way I'm just being paranoid. Something has to give! Someone has to irritate me!_ And then, I was struck by brilliance.

"Ferretclaw, lead a hunting patrol. Take Olivenose and Starlingwing with you." There. Done.

Ferretclaw, Olivenose, and Starlingwing were siblings. And while Olivenose and Starlingwing got along just fine, it was common knowledge that they both basically disowned Ferretclaw. Putting the trio together on the same patrol was bound to cause problems. There's no way they could leave camp without Ferretclaw gushing about how much I must have trusted him if I made him leader of a patrol (I didn't trust him, by the way), or Olivenose rolling her eyes, or Starlingwing cringing because he knew how stressful the patrol was going to be.

No, they were going to moan and complain and it was going to aggravate the life out of me, and I wouldn't be satisfied until they did!

And then the unexplainable happened.

They all nodded, stood to their paws, and then walked out of camp with the attitude of senior warriors.

Starlingwing didn't cringe. Olivenose didn't roll her eyes.

And Ferretclaw… Ferretclaw didn't utter _a single word_ about me.

I was too dumbfounded to move. Instead I stayed rooted to the spot like a grand oak tree, blue eyes wide with shock. _Maybe I'm dreaming?_ I wondered. _No, no that's not it… something's wrong with all of this. It's too peaceful, too easy._

And then it hit me; Dawnpelt! I hadn't seen Dawnpelt that morning!

A grin quickly spread across my lips as I darted towards the Warriors Den, ready to be irritated so that I could stop feeling so paranoid and get on with my life.

I found the creamy-colored she-cat curled up in her nest, sound asleep. I smirked wickedly as I made my way over to her nest, ready to annoy her and, in turn, be annoyed. When I reached her nest I let my frost-colored eyes roam her form for a second. _She looks so peaceful when she's asleep._

" _Dawnpelt_!" I exclaimed. "What are you doing still asleep? I told you to be up by the time I finished sorting patrols!" It was a lie, of course. I hadn't actually spoken to her ever since we'd finished Hailpaw's training early yesterday morning. She was bound to protest, and exclaim that I hadn't told her anything of the sort, and the argument was guaranteed to frustrate me.

Everything started off according to plan. Startled, she lept to her paws. Angered, she spun around to claw the ears off whoever had woken her up. She would realize it was me, be furious, and then-

Hold on. She wasn't furious. That was _not_ fury masking her features!

"Oh. Sorry, Crowfrost," Dawnpelt murmured, as she lowered her hazel eyes until they rested on her paws. "I must have forgotten and overslept."

"But I-you-" I was at a lost for words. _Did Dawnpelt just apologize? To me?_ "You're not going to argue with me?" I asked, painfully confused.

The creamy-colored warrior shrugged, eyes still on her paws. "Why would I? You told me to meet you and I forgot. It's my fault." But, see, _that was the thing._ I _didn't_ tell her to meet me!

"Um, okay," I started uncertainly. "Well, uh, don't worry about it. All is forgiven, I guess." _Great StarClan, what's going on this morning?!_ Maybe I really was dreaming! "I thought we could take Hailpaw out alone today; you know, so that he isn't distracted by Cloverpaw or Honeypaw."

Dawnpelt murmured her agreement.

"And I, um, thought we could let him try to actually catch something today? He's almost mastered the hunter's crouch, and he's gotten pretty good at stalking, so…"

Dawnpelt nodded once, letting me know that she agreed.

I couldn't believe it. Something was definitely wrong.

"Well then… come on. Let's go."

She let me lead the way.

 **Dawn Frost**

It wasn't fair.

Usually I would have been willing to chew off my left paw if it meant Dawnpelt would shut-up and keep her opinions to herself. And now here she was, silent as could be, and I wasn't able to enjoy it because I was paranoid.

I had yet to be irritated that morning. Patrols were easily sorted, no one complained about anything, Dawnpelt was behaving like a mute, and Hailpaw managed to catch a toad on his first try. As we returned back to camp I realized that I should have been ecstatic, and yet, I couldn't be.

"Dawnpelt," I started through gritted teeth once we reached the camp. "I have to talk to you."

Dawnpelt, whose eyes were still trained on her paws, simply nodded.

I looked at Hailpaw and gestured for him to enter camp without us, and then gave the strangely silent she-cat my full attention. "What's the matter with you today?" I demanded. "You've hardly spoken two words all day! Hailpaw caught a piece of prey on his first attempt; why aren't you thrilled?"

"I am," Dawnpelt whispered.

"That's a lie!" I spat. "If you were truly excited you wouldn't be able to contain yourself!"

I was yelling. Whenever I yelled at Dawnpelt she yelled back, then I yelled again, then she yelled again, and it became a contest to see who could insult the other the loudest.

But this time she didn't yell. She simply stared at her paws.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you!" I snarled. I was sick of her refusing to meet my gaze! I was sick of her obeying my every command, of her not voicing her opinions, of not trying to challenge me!

When she finally met my gaze I expected to see fire in her hazel eyes. Instead, I saw tears.

I felt like someone had just clawed me across the face; my fury immediately dimmed. _What's her problem?! Is she feeling okay, is she in pain?_

Then she sighed, long and shakily. " _Please_ ," Dawnpelt started, voice strained. "Just… just leave me _alone_."

She didn't want for me to respond. Instead she brushed past me and silently entered the camp. But it was just as well she didn't wait for a response, because at that moment, I had no idea what to say to her. I simply stood, stunned, rooted to the marshy ground.

 _You got your wish,_ a voice in my head whispered. _You were irritated. You yelled. Now you're done, and you can get on with your day._

I hung my head. _That wasn't what I wanted…_

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **Why do you think Dawnpelt was so panicked when Applefur mentioned night-training?**

 **#My lips are sealed**

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 **Phew, I'm so happy to have this chapter posted! The reason it took me awhile to get it out is because, originally, it was meant to be much, _much_ longer. But about ha;f-way through I realized that I could cut what I had written in half, and then post this chapter as a 'part 1' and next chapter as a 'part 2'. What this means is I already have the beginning of the next chapter written :) I much prefer this setup, considering a lot happens with part 1 and 2. It's really the turning point in the story, where Crowfrost and Dawnpelt start to look past their distaste for each other. **

**Speaking of our two lovely kitties, I would like to take a second to clear up some OOCness. Firstly, Crowfrost. He was a jerk in this chapter. I mean, he's typically a jerk in every chapter, but _this_ chapter really showcased his jerk-y-ness. He was caught mocking Dawnpelt and saying some rather cruel things about her, then he purposely tried to irritate his clanmates, and then he took all of his frustration out of Dawnpelt for doing exactly what he always wanted her to. Poor girl, she was put through the ringer during this chapter. Anyway, I don't view any of this as OOC behavior for Crowfrost because, to be blunt, he _is_ a jerk. He's cocky, rude, self-absorbed, and just genuinely believes that he's better than everyone else. But I feel like I've painted a picture that makes his jerk-y-ness attractive, and to be frank, it isn't. There is nothing attractive about being a jerk. So I intended for his behavior to be a bit of an eye-opener; this is Crowfrost. He's cruel, rude, and in his eyes he's invincible. It's sort of ironic because this is _exactly_ how Dawnpelt views Crowfrost, and yet, everyone else protests and sees him as a gift from StarClan. It's meant to be rather symbolic, actually, but I won't get into all of that here. **

**And then we have Dawnpelt. Her OOCness comes when she flees her patrol and Crowfrost, crying. Then Tigerheart drags her off to watch a sunset, and she starts sobbing all over him. Like Crowfrost, I don't view this as OOC behavior. I will admit that Dawnpelt is _not_ a cry-er by any means; she hates crying, she hates to watch others cry, it's like torture for her (I actually gave her that quick because I'm the exact same way). Dawnpelt wants to be viewed as tough and respectable, and in her eyes crying is the exact opposite of her desired image. However, with that being said, Dawnpelt is actually much "weaker" than she lets on. She's able to grit her teeth and bare through most situations, but I think she's been holding a lot in as of late, and she finally snapped. It doesn't make her pathetic by any means, she's a very strong she-cat, but in her eyes she's quite weak. **

**Now, I'm sure you think she was overreacting to Crowfrost's mocking - he was just mocking her, after all. Who cares? But guys, her _feelings_ were hurt. Crowfrost and Dawnpelt have never liked each other, they openly admit their hatred for each other quite frequently, but this was different. it felt different. Dawnpelt believes that Crowfrost would genuinely be glad if she died. And that's a rough realization to come to. The quote I chose for the chapter was aimed directly at her; she likes to put up a tough front, but after she heard Crowfrost say such horrible things about her, she feels like that's how so many others view her as well. She feels miserable. So that's why she was acting so strange during their training session - now she knows what he truly thinks of her, and despite Tigerheart's assurance, she can't help but wonder if Crowfrost is right. Plus, I don't think the fact that she almost drowned had really sunk in yet, so there was also the trauma from that still building up. Dawnpelt's the type of cat to bottle up her feelings rather than address them, and eventually she snaps and comes undone. This was one of those moments. **

**Alright! Now that I've gotten that off my chest, I'll leave you guys to review now (;)). I just wanted to clear up any confusion.**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	6. Part 2 - The Recovering and Remorseful

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

* * *

 **Chapter Six - Part 2 - The Recovering and The Remorseful**

* * *

 **"And in the end, we'll only regret the chances we didn't take." - Unknown**

* * *

 **Crowfrost's POV**

I shuffled my paws as I waited for her to show up.

I glanced up at the sky. The sun was past the point of setting, only a pawful of rays were still visible above the mountain peaks. The sky was painted cobalt blue, and thin wisps of clouds were sown across the vastness. The stars had started to appear as well, and twinkled in the sky like fireflies. Just then a chilly breeze brushed past me, and I resisted the urge to shiver.

The sky was getting darker sooner, the wind was cold. _Leaf-bare has definitely arrived,_ I thought, disappointed. Although it could have only begun within the past couple of days, it was already starting to take its toll on ShadowClan's short-furred residents, myself included.

 _It could be worse,_ I thought, attempting to brighten my outlook. _Waspstripe and Olivenose have the shortest pelts of anyone else in ShadowClan; I'm sure they're miserable already._ Oh, if only Ferretclaw didn't have such a thick, fluffy pelt. Maybe if he did, I could convince him to guard the camp every night until he caught green-cough and died. Or until he _froze_ to death. Whichever happened first.

 _ **You** deserve to die, you lousy excuse for a clanmate!_ My conscious snapped. I couldn't help but huff indignantly when it did so; even _my own conscious_ thought I deserved to die!

However, my indignation only lasted for a few seconds until I sighed and lowered my head. _Maybe it's right. After that stunt I pulled earlier…_

I shook my head to clear it. I hadn't been trying to hurt Dawnpelt, but I was just so sick of her mopey, silent behavior! She was acting like a victim, silent as a mute! She'd been acting like this for _days_ now, and the worst part was _I still had no idea why_! What had I done to her?!

I shook my head again, this time more forcefully than the last. My goal had not been to hurt her, or to push her past her limit. I'd been trying to help her! To challenge her, to get a rise out of her! The Dawnpelt I knew and loathed would never have just stood there and listened, as I spat and snarled at her.

 _"What's happened to you?! What's turned you into such… such a mouse-heart!"_

 _"A coward!"_

 _"You're acting like a spolid brat, Dawnpelt! But then again, that's all you've ever been, isn't it?"_

 _"You prance around like you're the clan leader, but now you can't stand to look me - or anyone else for that matter - in the eye. Not even the apprentices!"_

 _"You'll never be a brilliant warrior. You'll never live up to Rowanstar and Tawnypelt's legacy. You'll only ever be a pretty face."_

I squeezed my eyes shut, as I thought about only some of the insults I'd snarled at her. I was only trying to spark a fire in her stomach. I just wanted her to respond.

Technically I got exactly what I'd wished for - she responded, alright. She burst into tears, shoved past me, and darted into the warrior's den. I thanked StarClan it was sun-high, and that most of the clan were spending time outside the camp. The warriors den was empty, at least.

I never returned to camp. Instead I spun around and marched right back into the forest, where I let my paws decide my path and tried not to let my guilt consume me whole. _Guilt._ It was an emotion that I was by no means accustomed to, and I absolutely loathed it. I spent the better part of my day in that pine forest, trying to distract my mind. Nothing I did worked. I couldn't focus enough to hunt, and if I'd tried sparring with someone then I would have ended up killing them. I worked some on my pine-climbing abilities, but what was the point when I wasn't able to give it my all?

Part of me wanted to talk to Scorchfur or Smokefoot about the situation, but I really had no desire to return to camp and search for them. Besides, I could just as easily imagine what they would say to me.

 _"Apologize to her. Apologize to her now, Crowfrost!"_

 _"Wow. Just… wow. You really screwed-up this time, didn't you, Crowfrost?"_

I growled lowly and shook my head. Stupid Smokefoot, he was never any help.

But Scorchfur, ever the voice of reason, might have a point. Maybe if I sucked up my pride and apologized to Dawnpelt, she would feel all high-and-mighty and return to her regular, annoying self. But there were too many flaws in that plan. First of all, I didn't feel so guilty that I would be willing to stomp all over my pride like that. Second of all, I still hadn't the faintest idea of what caused Dawnpelt's downward spiral in the first place!

I sighed, and my breath billowed into a cloudy puff in the cold air. I might not feel guilty enough to apologize to her, but I definitely felt guilty. And guilt, I soon decided, was an emotion that I despised.

 _I just have to distract my mind,_ I thought. _After I do that I won't be able to think about the guilt, Dawnpelt will come to her senses and stop moping around, and everything will go back to normal._

It was that thought process that led me to my current location; the border we shared with RiverClan.

 _Ugh, where is she? I told her to meet me when the sun started to disappear behind the mountains, didn't I? Well, the sun's lowered so far that I can't even see its rays anymore! The moon is out and shining, for StarClan's sake!_

I figured my mental rambling was supposed to be another form of distraction. I hadn't used she-cats for pleasure ever since I became the deputy of ShadowClan. Well… at least not from other clans. Sure, I flirted with them. Whispered sweet nothings in their ears that I never meant. Made them feel like the only she-cat in the world. That was fun. But this… the Warrior Code never stated that mating with a cat from another clan was wrong, but I'm sure it was meant to be implied.

I shoved my conscious down as it continued to yip in my ear, and rambled on about how this was wrong, how a deputy should hold itself to a higher standard, the likes. I'd quit seeing she-cats from other clans a moon or so before the Dark Forest battle. Tensions among the clans were running too high, and then the battle was over and ShadowClan was an absolute mess; I didn't have the time to spear. Then Blackstar died and Rowanstar appointed me as the new deputy, and I really didn't have any extra time. Besides; I did have a few morels, and using she-cats for pleasure wasn't a very deputy-like thing to do.

But I needed a distraction now, and desperate times called for desperate measures. Besides. The she-cats certainly never protested.

Speaking of she-cats…

A reed bed started to quiver, and a second later, a silver tabby she-cat stepped out gracefully. "Sorry I'm late, Crowfrost," Shimmerpelt started. "My clanmates wouldn't leave me alone. You know how it is." she rolled her blue eyes. "Desperate toms asking you to go hunting with them, petty she-cat's sticking close to your side, begging for your approval." Her voice was interesting; it was condescending and stuck-up, but at the same time, it was softer than a cloud and oh-so seductive. I pushed my still-yapping conscious firmly to the side as I smirked.

Shimmerpelt was one of the newer warriors of RiverClan. She'd only been a warrior for a few moons, but already she was quite popular, especially with the toms. Condescending as she was, she was stunning. Her silver pelt shimmered in the moonlight, completely living up to her name. She caught my eye many times, on patrols and at Gatherings, so when I decided on a distraction I knew immediately who I wanted to meet up with.

Smirking, I said, "It's fine - you're well worth the wait."

Shimmerpelt narrowed her light blue eyes playfully. "Flattery will get you nowhere, Crowfrost. I only agreed to talk to you tonight; nothing more, nothing less." she paused, and then said, "Well. At least not until you convince me otherwise."

The gorgeous RiverClan she-cat had a strong point; when I managed to speak with her earlier that day, she never promised we would get intimate. She simply agreed to meet up and talk to me. But we both knew that intimacy was certainly an option, and frankly, I figured it would be like this ahead of time. I knew Shimmerpelt's type - she wanted me to 'convince' her, to shower her with compliments and attention, and stroke her ego. It was part of the fun.

But for one right, there was also a wrong: flattery would get me _everywhere._

"Well, why don't you walk with me, and give me the chance to convince you, hmm?" I suggested, and her blue eyes lit up. She'd been waiting for the opportunity to get me to herself, I knew.

"A fair warning," she started, as she leapt gracefully over the border that divided ShadowClan and RiverClan. "I'm not your average she-cat. _I'm_ actually a _challenge_."

An amused purr rumbled deep within my chest as I pressed against her side. "Well then, I suppose I ought to give you a warning of my own: I always love a challenge," I whispered huskily in her ear. If her elated shiver was anything to go back, I was already proving to be very convincing.

Her eyes fluttered shut for a second, and my smirk deepened. _Oh darling, if only you knew. I specialize in "challenging", and you're the most average she-cat yet._

 **Dawn Frost**

I twinned our tails together as we walked. Shimmerpelt shot me a playful glance and remarked, "You're certainly not wasting any time, are you?"

I gave her a look that read, _'can you really blame me'?_ "I've had my eye on you for awhile now," I replied. "There's no one in ShadowClan like you." It was a blatant lie. Grassheart, although she wasn't nearly as stunning, was very similar in personality to the she-cat. Condescending, vain, and lived off of the attention of others. Fortunately, unlike Grassheart, Shimmerpelt wasn't a former Dark Forest trainee. I wouldn't have asked her to meet with me if she had been.

Skepticism alighted in Shimmerpelt's eyes. "No one?" she echoed in bitter disbelief.

Lazily, I raised an eyebrow. _Oh? I wonder where this is going._ "You don't believe me?"

Shimmerpelt tried to downplay her apparent resentment with a shrug. "I do, for the most part. Beauty and talent like mine is hard to rival." _Yep, you are definitely average._ "But… well, I've heard what toms whisper about me, and I've heard the same things whispered about your clanmate, _Dawnpelt_." she spat 'Dawnpelt' like the word was crowfood in her mouth.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes; _Are you serious? I met up with Shimmerpelt so that I could forget about Dawnpelt!_ However, now that she mentioned it, I realized that Shimmerpelt had a point. If there was any other she-cat who could challenge Dawnpelt, by beauty or skill, it would have to be Shimmerpelt.

 _How ironic that both of their suffixes are 'pelt',_ the less focused part of my mind thought.

"What's your point?" I asked, and hopped that Shimmerpelt mistook my gruff tone as husky.

The silver she-cat fixed me with a curious look. "You said there's no one else in ShadowClan like me. What about Dawnpelt?"

The words tumbled past my lips before I could think about them. "Trust me, you're _nothing_ like Dawnpelt."

Shimmerpelt blinked, caught off guard, and then her eyes softened. She leaned forward and placed a lick on my cheek, and then whispered in my ear, "Consider me convinced, Crowfrost. Did you have a particular spot in mind, or-?"

I smirked, and Shimmerpelt swooned. "Of course I do. I told you, I've had my eye on you for awhile. Follow me." The blue-eyed she-cat didn't hesitate. Instead she kept pace with me, and made sure that our pelts were constantly pressed together.

 **Dawn Frost**

As was routine, I woke up early the next morning. It took me a second to gather my bearings, as I hadn't awoke in the warrior's den and there was a RiverClan warrior in another nest beside me, but I relaxed soon enough. At one point in time, mornings like these were also part of my routine.

Shimmerpelt had been confused when we didn't share a nest that night, and I gave her the same answer I gave every one-night stand: "I don't like sharing nests." It was a quick excuse that very few she-cats ever seemed to catch the meaning of, but realization had sharpened Shimmerpelt's eyes. Don't mistake tonight for anything; we aren't mates, so don't get attached. I figured I wouldn't have to worry about Shimmerpelt getting attached; she seemed to share my views.

I usually left the scene before the she-cats woke up, so that I wouldn't be confronted with declarations of newfound love, but I didn't think I had to worry about that with Shimmerpelt. So instead I started to groom my pelt, licking down stray tufts of fur and washing the scent of RiverClan off my body.

My mind never stopped functioning. My head was always filled with thoughts and comments, even in the early hours of the morning. StarClan had taken mercy on me and banished Dawnpelt from my mind after I finished my conversation with Shimmerpelt, but their grace seemed to have expired. As I groomed my pelt, I found my thoughts drifting back to last night's conversation.

 _"Trust me, you're nothing like Dawnpelt."_ Clearly Shimmerpelt had taken that as another compliment, but the more I thought about it, the more doubtful I became. In a sense it wasn't even the truth; Dawnpelt and Shimmerpelt shared many similarities. They were both graceful and confident in themselves, and had standards that were almost impossible to match. They were both breathtakingly gorgeous. And, although I had yet to see Shimmerpelt hunt, at one point I watched her fight during the Dark Forest battle; even for a new warrior, she was good.

And yet, there was something that set them apart from each other. There was something in my statement that held truthful. But what was it?

"Someone's deep in thought." I glanced back and watched as Shimmerpelt rose to her paws and stretched.

"Sleep well?" I asked, mostly to deter the conversation.

A yawn escaped the silver she-cats lips as she nodded. "Fairly well. It's not exactly easy to fall asleep in enemy territory, but," she shot me a smirk. "I've had some practiced."

I raised an eyebrow. "Not with anyone from ShadowClan."

She shook her head. "No, not ShadowClan - not until you. Mostly from WindClan; Gorsetail, Weaselfur, and before he took a mate, Emberfoot."

"What about ThunderClan?" I prompted, mostly for the sake of conversation as I continued to groom my pelt.

Shimmerpelt snorted. "Oh, they're a stubborn bunch. I managed to convince Molestripe to meet up with me once or twice, but that's about it." she paused for a patient second, and then added, "I wish I could get Thornclaw's attention, he's quite handsome."

I stifled a grin when she mentioned the golden brown warrior, and hoped that Shimmerpelt didn't notice. "Good luck with that. I hear he's got a thing for Hazeltail."

Shimmerpelt wrinkled her nose. "Surely not. Thornclaw's such a bold, fierce tom. There's no way he has feelings for a kittypet!" I went to point out that Hazeltail was a former kittypet, and only by birth, and that of all the clans ThunderClan was the most tolerant of non-clan blood, but something in Shimmerpelt's eyes made me pause. She was studying me intently, like she was trying to piece together a puzzle.

Finally she said, "You know, everything they say about you is true."

It wasn't quite what I was expecting her to say. Curiously, I mused, "Oh?"

The RiverClan warrior nodded. "The she-cats speak highly of you. They say you're handsome, charming, confident…" she trailed off. "Of course, anyone who's spoken to you before could piece that together. But they say there's something else about you that they can't quite place, something that attracts cats of all kinds to you."

"What do you think it is?" I asked.

She narrowed her blue eyes in thought. "I'm not sure. Honestly, it was one of the reasons why I've wanted to meet with you for so long. Maybe I could try and put my paw on it, but…" she shrugged. "I'm about as clueless as they are."

I masked my disappointment well enough, although the curiosity was going to kill me. I'd heard what cats whispered about me; they praised me as if I were a StarClan warrior. But this was the first time I'd heard about that "something else". I wondered what other quality attracted cats to me.

"I'd better get back to RiverClan," Shimmerpelt meowed suddenly. "If I'm not in my nest when Reedwhisker start's assigning cats to the dawn patrols, someone will notice for sure."

I glanced at the sun. "My clanmates probably won't question it if I'm late. They always rejoice when I give them a few more moments of sleep. However," I started to my paws. "I have a reputation to uphold."

"Reputations are important," Shimmerpelt remarked. "Better not let anything damage yours."

I was a masterful actor and easily schooled my features into a nonchalant expression, but I couldn't help but wonder if Shimmerpelt's comment was as casual as she made it sound. Someone more suspicious than I might take it as a warning, or a threat.

"You were a good partner," I commented as we walked. The RiverClan border was on the way back to camp. "What do you say we meet up again sometime?"

"Maybe," the silver she-cat replied. We both knew what she meant.

 **Dawn Frost**

I had hoped that meeting with Shimmerpelt would take my mind off of Dawnpelt, but it seemed that my conscious was determined to torment me. It had been three days since I met with the stunning RiverClan she-cat, and already the guilt had returned - no. The guilt had returned completely, and then _doubled._

Maybe if I wasn't forced to see Dawnpelt every day I would have been better off, but alas, I _was_ forced to see her. It wouldn't have been very difficult to avoid her if I only had to assign her to patrols, but as dejected as she was, she stubbornly refused to quit helping me with Hailpaw. But I was beginning to wonder how much longer she would cling to her duty; everyday she seemed to sink deeper and deeper into her depression.

It was only a matter of time until the rest of ShadowClan caught onto her somber behavior, if they hadn't already. There would be questions, a demand for answers. And as the cat who spent the most time with Dawnpelt on a day to day basis, I would be the one they interrogated first.

Plus the curiosity was finally too much for me to bear. What in the name of StarClan did I do to her to make her so, so… _so not-Dawnpelt?_

 _Maybe one of her friends know something?_ I thought, as I paced the camp. Yes, friends were a good place to start!

But I was immediately met with a problem. Dawnpelt didn't have very many friends within the clan.

Obviously she was good friends with Olivenose, but my former apprentice was nowhere to be seen. A frown played across my lips as I wondered where she could have gone, and then I remembered that Owlclaw had asked for her help with Cloverpaw's training session that day.

 _Alright, that's fine. She **is** close to more than one cat._ As a matter of fact, she was very close to a former fling of mine; Ivytail! I eagerly started to scan the camp for the white-and-black-tortoiseshell she-cat, but my was search was rendered fruitless. Ivytail, like Olivenose, was nowhere to be seen.

 _Okay, what about… Hailpaw! They're close._ But bringing my apprentice into my problem just didn't sound appropriate, and I-

I stopped. _Since when did this become MY problem?_

 _Face it, Crowfrost. Whatever the reason Dawnpelt is so upset, it's probably your fault._ Well that didn't sound very fair at all. I certainly wasn't fond of the little voice in the back of my head.

 _Ignore the voice in your head, Crowfrost. You have more important matters to attend to! Like getting to the bottom of all this Dawnpelt drama!_

 _Actually, hearing a voice in your head is not a healthy sign. I should probably talk to Littlecloud about it. Like, right now._ Yes! That was a good plan. _Insane voice now, Dawnpelt drama later!_

 _Hey! I'm not insane! I'm the opposite of insane! I'm, uh… not-insane!_

"Oh my StarClan, I'm arguing with my conscious," I whimpered. "This is so weird!"

"Did you say something, Crowfrost?" My head shot up, startled, and my eyes widened with relief when they fell on Tigerheart. _Of course, it's perfect! Everyone knows how close Dawnpelt and Tigerheart are!_

I hopped that outwardly I didn't appear as frazzled as I felt, then said, "Nothing important. But I was actually just looking for you, Tigerheart." _Well, sorta._

I was taken back when I noticed the hostility in the tom's amber gaze. _Is all of that directed towards me?_ Well. It seemed like I was on the right track. "I don't suppose you know what's bothering Dawnpelt?" I asked, as I decided to play innocent for awhile.

But it seemed like Tigerheart had the same idea. He raised an eyebrow, the picture of nonchalance. "What do you mean?"

"She's been acting really strange this past half-moon," I replied. "She won't look me in the eye, she won't speak to me…" I trailed off and waited for Tigerheart to pick the conversation back up. The hostility in his eyes had increased tenfold, there was no way that he didn't know something.

The dark brown tabby tom snorted and glared off to the side, I supposed to hide the anger on his features. _Not that it's doing him any good. His movements are too tense, like he's having to hold himself back from attacking me._ What a pleasant thought.

"Tigerheart," I pressed softly. "I know that you know something. What did I do to her?" Because, according to my (insane) conscious, this whole situation was definitely my fault.

The amber-eyed tom turned his head to look at me, and I was inwardly impressed with the emotion that gleamed in his eyes; anger. Oh, whatever Dawnpelt told him, it infuriated him. "She doesn't want me to talk to you about it," he replied stiffly.

My features creased into a frown. "It's that bad, huh?" Usually Dawnpelt didn't hesitate to lecture me on what I'd done wrong, but it seemed like this time she was making sure that I remained oblivious. _Silly, stupid Dawnpelt. Don't you know I always get my way?_ If I had questions then I was going to get answers. "Alright then," I said, as I seated myself. "Don't outright tell me. Just give me a hint."

Tigerheart eyed me for a moment before he replied. "You're very loud."

My frown deepened. _I'm… loud? How is that supposed to help me?_ "Give me another hint."

"You should leave gossiping to the queens."

This time my eyebrows shot up in surprise. "I haven't gossiped about Dawnpelt. Well, not recently, at least." Did last night's conversation count as gossip? _No, no it didn't,_ I quickly decided.

My statement didn't seem to please Tigerheart, if the gritting of his teeth was anything to go by. "Then just forget it, Crowfrost. If you don't care enough to remember what you said then it's no use." I opened my mouth to protest that I couldn't "just forget about it", before I checked myself and thought better of it. I didn't need anyone to question my intentions when I wasn't even sure of them myself.

"You sure you don't want to give me just one more hint?" I asked, although I already knew the answer. If Tigerheart stayed around to talk to me much longer than the fire in his amber orbs was going to melt his eyes. Something told me he knew that as well.

The tiger-stripped tom snorted and shook his head in disgust, much to my offense. "I'm sure. Dawnpelt was right; you wouldn't care even if I told you." Then he turned around and stalked off, and left me with my jaw hung open.

 _Well… that's a cruel statement. Good to know Dawnpelt thinks so little of me._ Oh, that was going to bother me until I got to the bottom of this mess.

I would care! I was a caring tom! At least I wasn't a snotty, uptight she-cat who wouldn't know how to loosen up even if 'fun' came to her in the form of an adder and bit her tail!

 _So she assumes I'm incapable of showing remorse. That's not true, I can be remorseful!_ Granted I'd never been remorseful in a case where Dawnpelt was involved, but that's because, whenever Dawnpelt was involved, I was always right. Who would be remorseful in a situation where they'd been right?

 _"You wouldn't care even if I told you…"_ I gritted my teeth together as Tigerheart's words echoed throughout my mind. Maybe it wasn't just that she thought I couldn't be remorseful; maybe she also didn't think I would care because it was _her_. As for whether or not she was wrong…

I loathed Dawnpelt. I didn't like her, I didn't like her personality; everything about her seemed to irritate me. But she was still my clanmate, and because of that I would always care about her well-being to an extent. Not as Dawnpelt, but as a clanmate. The same logic applied to those who trained in the Dark Forest. I despised them as cats, but as my clanmates, I cared about them to an extent. I didn't want anything to do with them, but I also didn't want them to catch greencough and die a slow, agonizing death.

My brow furrowed as I continued to mull over the situation. Dawnpelt must know that I care somewhat about her, mustn't she? After all, I did save her life only a couple half-moons ago! Didn't heroically saving lives count for anything these days?!

"Crowfrost? Are you okay?" Scorchfur's concerned voice jolted me out of my thoughts. I glanced up from my paws and settled my frosty-blue gaze on he and Smokefoot. "You look pretty serious."

Smokefoot snorted in amusement. "There's a word you don't describe Crowfrost with very often."

I shot the smoky-colored tom a cold look, to which he retaliated with a smirk. "Yeah, don't worry Scorchfur. I'm fine. I'm just… thinking."

I rolled my eyes when Smokefoot gasped dramatically. "Will wonders never cease?" he exclaimed.

"Smokefoot," Scorchfur growled in warning. He returned his attention to me. "What are you thinking about? It must be pretty important."

I hesitated. "Not… important, per se. I mean, it's not like I'm thinking of the fate of the clans or anything. But it's something that I can't stop thinking about."

Smokefoot sensed that the conversation was far from ending, as he laid down and made himself comfortable. With a raised eyebrow he said, "Do tell."

"It's Dawnpelt," I started. "She's been acting really strange recently. She won't quit staring at her paws, she flinches every time I say something - StarClan, she won't even speak!" I exclaimed, exasperated.

Smokefoot and Scorchfur exchanged puzzled glances. "I fail to see the problem," Scorchfur meowed.

"Same here," Smokefoot added. "All you ever do is complain about how stuck-up Dawnpelt is, or how she never listens to you, or how she never shuts-up. This is kinda what you've always wanted."

I opened my jaws to protest against Smokefoot's accusation but the words dried in my throat. I didn't like to admit it, but my smoky-colored companion had a point. This is version of Dawnpelt that I'd literally prayed to StarClan for! Then why does this new, silent Dawnpelt annoy me even more than her old, outspoken self? Things simply weren't making sense! Nothing was going as it should!

I chose my explanation carefully. "Because, if my conversation with Tigerheart meant anything, she's moping because of something I said. The problem is I don't know what I said, and the curiosity is killing me!"

Scorchfur snorted. "Figures. You don't care that you hurt Dawnpelt's feelings, you just want to know what it is you said." the gray tom studied me for a couple heart-beats. "Will you apologize to her once you realize what you said?"

Contempt settled on my features as I eyed Scorchfur, which seemed to tell him all it needed to.

"Hey," Smokefoot suddenly spoke up. "You remember when we ran into Applefur's patrol a couple days ago while we were hunting?"

I narrowed my pale blue eyes. "Yes, and if I recall correctly, she seemed awfully happy to see you. Why haven't you told her you're not interested in Dark Forest scum yet?"

"Don't get sidetracked Crowfrost, I'm onto something," Smokefoot said with a swish of his tail. "Anyway, Olivenose was on the patrol and she's Dawnpelt's best friend. Odds are she was on it too. What if she overheard you mocking her?"

Scorchfur shot the smokey-gray tom a stern look. "Hey now, you were mocking her too! Crowfrost isn't the only one to blame! But," he shifted his amber gaze to rest on me. "That's actually not a bad theory. Smokefoot has a point; Dawnpelt and Olivenose go hunting together all the time. And you were making a lot of noise looking for that rabbit-"

"You know, the one _that doesn't exist_ -"

"Anyway," Scorchfur went on, pointedly. "If the she-cats were close enough, they would have been able to hear every word you said." the dark gray tom tipped his head to the side. "Do you think that would have been enough to send Dawnpelt into her slump?"

I snorted. "Of course not! I say way worse things about Dawnpelt _to her face_ all the time. All she ever does is think of something to say about me. Besides," I licked a paw and drew it over my ear. "That's assuming she heard what I said. But Dawnpelt almost never pleasure-hunts with a group. And she seems to have this thing against Grassheart too. Why would she willingly spend time with her?"

Smokefoot didn't seem convinced. "What if Olivenose dragged her along?" he suggested. "Forced her to socialize? You know she's been doing it she they were apprentices. They-"

"Smokefoot," I started, my voice a bit strained. "That isn't why she's depressed. Even if she did overhear me, what I said wasn't that cruel. It was just a joke."

Scorchfur shook his head. "Come on Crowfrost, you can't be serious. This has to be why she's so upset! You injured her pride, hurt her feelings, it makes complete sense! You just need to-"

I gritted my teeth together and then interrupted the amber-eyed tom. "Well guys, it was nice chatting with you, but I think I hear Rowanstar calling for me! I should probably go see what he wants."

Smokefoot scoffed. "We're not _lizard-brains,_ Crowfrost. Rowanstar isn't-"

"What's that?" I called, as I slowly made my way towards Rowanstar's den. "I can't hear you over Rowanstar's yelling!"

Scorchfur wore an incredulous expression, as if he couldn't believe I was using such a pathetic excuse to leave the conversation. "You can't just run away from this! Crowfrost? _Crowfrost_!"

"I'll talk to you guys later!" I called over my shoulder once more, before I broke out into a sprint and darted into my clan leader's den. I found myself grinning as I ran, thoroughly amused with myself. When I skidded to a stop inside the den, Rowanstar lifted his head and peered at me with a question in his dark green gaze.

"Why are you grinning like a fool?" he asked dryly. "I swear to StarClan, if you've killed Ferretclaw-"

I huffed. "Don't worry, Ferretclaw's still alive." Then, under my breath I muttered, "for now."

Rowanstar's gaze sharpened. "What was that?" he demanded.

"Nothing," I meowed quickly. I changed the subject before he could drag the truth out of me. "Did you need something? I thought I heard you call for me."

The dark ginger tom eyed me suspiciously. "No, I never called for you. As a matter of fact I was about to leave."

"Oh?" I prompted.

Rowanstar nodded, and I got the feeling he wasn't convinced I was telling the truth. "So I can't stay around and inquire of your true intentions for bursting into my den-" Honestly, Rowanstar was too intelligent for his own good. "-as I'm already late." he exhaled softly. "I promised Tawnypelt we could spend the evening together, but just before you arrived Pinenose showed up and informed me that Dawnpelt has been acting strange lately, and her behavior has Hailpaw worried."

I froze, and the mad grin I had been sporting fell from my lips. "Dawnpelt?" I asked, just to be sure he hadn't said 'Waspstripe' or 'Snowbird' and I simply hadn't heard him correctly.

But, much to my disappointment, Rowanstar nodded. "Apparently she's been silent during Hailpaw's training sessions, and she isn't eating. Hailpaw said she seems miserable."

 _She isn't eating?_ I blinked, surprised. Now that Rowanstar mentioned it I hadn't seen Dawnpelt hanging around the fresh-kill pile lately, but I simply assumed I was always at the wrong place at the wrong time.

"Maybe Hailpaw's just overreacting?" I offered, hopefully. "After all, if she was that bad, don't you think someone one would have come to you sooner?"

Rowanstar's features took on a grave expression. "They have, actually," he meowed. "A few cats have drifted in to let me know that she's been acting strange; depressed." he sighed. "I didn't think very much of it because occasionally Dawnpelt goes through phases when she simply wants to be left alone, but Pinenose was very insistent. She said that her behavior has Hailpaw concerned, and-" suddenly the ginger tom paused, as if a new thought occurred to him. "Actually Crowfrost, you're with Dawnpelt every day now. You haven't noticed anything… _off_ , about her, have you?

Part of me was tempted to lie, and say that she seemed perfectly fine. But if cats were already coming to Rowanstar, and if Hailpaw was really that concerned about her, then it was only a matter of time until Rowanstar learned the truth. So instead I carefully choose my words and said, "Well, now that you've mentioned it, Dawnpelt has been quieter than usual. I just assumed she agreed with everything I was telling Hailpaw." _Hah, fat chance._

I thanked StarClan that I did so well under pressure. My voice was smooth and sure, and left no room for doubt. Rowanstar didn't seem to pick up on my fib. He sighed and said, "If that's the case then maybe something really is wrong with her. Alright, I'll cancel my evening with Tawnypelt so that I can take Dawnpelt to Littlecloud; maybe I can coax some information out of her, see what has her in such a slump."

All at once alarms started going off in my head. _No! Rowanstar can't talk to her!_ Overbearing as he may be, Dawnpelt loved her father dearly, and trusted him completely. If Rowanstar managed to get her to crack… if she told him whatever it was that I'd done to her… suddenly I was reminded of the argument we'd had the day after I saved Dawnpelt from drowning.

 _"You would chose someone else to be your deputy?"_

 _"If I thought you were no longer worthy of the position? Absolutely. You've developed a superiority-complex where you believe that you're irreplaceable, and if you don't start making different decisions than you're going to be in for a rude-awakening."_

Rowanstar was very close to his family; Tawnypelt, Tigerheart, and Dawnpelt. Dawnpelt was his only daughter, his precious treasure. If he found out that I was the one responsible for sending her into this downward spiral of depression, then that would be it. There would be no more second chances, no more arguments. I would be a regular warrior once more, while someone else became the new ShadowClan deputy.

I could practically hear Shimmerpelt's feather-soft whisper in my head. _"Reputations are important. Better not let anything damage yours."_

Oh, StarClan…

"Let me take her." I said abruptly.

Rowanstar narrowed his leaf-green eyes. " _You_?" he snorted, disbelief thick in his tone. "Why would you want to do that?"

"Oh, come on Rowanstar," I started. "Surely you must have noticed how we aren't constantly at each other's throats anymore! Ever since I agreed to let her train Hailpaw with me, our relationship has improved drastically!" Maybe I was being a bit overdramatic. Our relationship hadn't improved "drastically", but the fact that we could manage a conversation without a single insult was pretty impressive.

Rowanstar didn't seem entirely convinced, as made clear by the skepticism in his eyes. "You're friends now?"

I hesitated. "I wouldn't call us "friends" per say, but I…" I trailed off when the doubt in Rowanstar's eyes hardened. I wasn't making any progress fast. "I care about her," I finally finished.

The large ginger tom scoffed. "You care about Dawnpelt?" _Er, no, not really. I still sorta can't stand the sight of her, to be honest._

Of course I couldn't voice my thoughts, so I shrugged. "I told you; our relationship has improved."

Rowanstar studied me for a few heartbeats before he gave in. "Alright. I've already canceled on Tawnypelt once before, if I do it again it'll be moons until I hear the end of it."

Relief crashed over me like a wave. _I'm safe. Rowanstar won't be able to get any information out of Dawnpelt._ "She's still adjusting to being mates with the clan leader, huh?" I asked, my voice weary with relief.

Rowanstar flicked an ear, and I noticed he was trying not to smile. "She'll adjust," he assured me. "It just might… take a couple more moons."

"If she doesn't come around soon then I could always be your mate," I offered. Maybe it was a crazy offer, and maybe I regretted it as soon as the words left my mouth, but I couldn't help it. The relief had relaxed my brain, which was no longer able to keep up with my mouth.

Rowanstar stared at me as if I'd grown a second head. "Crowfrost, when you take Dawnpelt to see Littlecloud, please have yourself checked-up as well."

I snorted indignantly, but mumbled that I would. With my position as deputy secured and my clan leader thoroughly concerned for my mental health, I stood to my paws and padded towards the lip of the den.

"Crowfrost."

I paused and glanced backwards, and was taken back when I saw that a smile had finally played across Rowanstar's lips. "I'm glad that you and Dawnpelt are finally getting along. For awhile I was convinced that you two would forever be at each other's' throats, hissing and spitting insults. Thanks for making an effort to change things."

It was good that I was such a talented actor, otherwise Rowanstar would have noticed that the smile I shot him was forced.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

"Dawnpelt, please, talk to me," Olivenose continued to plead. I continued to pretend that I was asleep, and that I couldn't hear a word she whispered.

"I already apologized to you," the tortoiseshell she-cat went on softly. "Just… just talk to me, please. Cats are starting to take notice of your behavior; if you go on like this for much longer then it won't be long until Rowanstar realizes something is wrong."

 _Let him notice,_ I thought dully. _Maybe if I tell him what's wrong, he'll banish Crowfrost from the clan._ Impossibly wishful thinking on my part. Everyone knew that Rowanstar harbored a soft spot for his former apprentice. It seemed like everyone who ever met Crowfrost had a soft spot for him, at one time or another.

Olivenose exhaled a sigh, her breath heavy with sorrow and regret. "Okay," she whispered. "I'll leave you alone, then. I'll let you continue to ignore me while you pretend you're asleep. But don't get too comfortable; I'll be back later." I flicked an ear as her pawsteps became a fading echo in the deserted den.

I opened my eyes when I knew she was gone, and heaved a sigh. Maybe in a different circumstance I would feel guilty for treating my best friend so coldly, but Olivenose had messed up and I wasn't ready to forgive her yet.

It happened a couple days ago…

 _"Come on, Dawnpelt," she hissed underneath her breath, as I continued to prod the frog that laid at my paws, uninterested. "It's been two days since you overheard Crowfrost. Let it go already!"_

 _"Easy for you to say," I muttered. "If you overheard Crowfrost mocking you and calling you horrible, you would have died of heartbreak already."_

 _Olivenose scoffed. "No I wouldn't have. Unlike you, I would have forgiven him already."_

 _A frown tugged at the corners of my lips, and slowly I raised my gaze so that it rested on Olivenose stubborn expression. "Are you serious?" I asked. "He hasn't even apologized."_

 _Olivenose shrugged. "So what? I could never stay mad at Crowfrost."_

 _My frown tightened. "Even if you overheard him mocking you, portraying you as a horrible cat, and-"_

 _"Great StarClan, Dawnpelt!" Olivenose snapped. "Stop painting yourself as a victim here; Crowfrost was just goofing off with his friends! If we hadn't had stumbled across his patrol then you never would have even known he was talking about you!"_

 _It was strange, really. I could feel my expression hardening, no doubt portraying my resentment, and yet, the tears that welled in my eyes suggested that I was hurt._

 _"You're really defending him over me?" I whispered. I wished my voice would have matched my stoney expression, but instead it went right along with my tears. "I know you have feelings for Crowfrost, but… you're taking his side over mine?"_

 _Olivenose's green eyes widened before softening. She knew she made a mistake. "Dawnpelt, I didn't-"_

 _"Yes you did," I cut her off as I stood to my paws. It took everything in me to not break into a sprint and dart out of camp. "You meant every word."_

My heart was heavy in my chest as the memory replayed itself in my mind. It still felt so raw, as if the scene had taken place only minutes ago, instead of days. I inhaled a breath when I realized that I was on the verge of tears; I was sick of crying.

Tigerheart told me that Crowfrost was wrong; that I wasn't a horrible cat. And I wanted to believe him. Oh, how badly I wanted to believe him! I knew that Tigerheart would never lie to me, but… he was my brother. Didn't that mean his views were bias?

It just… it seemed like the more I thought about it, the more horrible I was, even to myself. Especially to myself.

First Flametail clearly resented me for not saving him. Then Crowfrost, and apparently Smokefoot, seemed to agree that I was cruel, uptight, and horrible. And then… what about when Flametail died, and I stood up and accused Jayfeather of murder at the Gathering? It was thanks to me that he was suspended from his duties, even when, in the end, he was proven innocent. He hated me. Heck, the whole ThunderClan hated me!

 _They're right to hate me,_ I thought, as I buried my face in my paws.

"Dawnpelt?"

At first I thought that Olivenose had returned, or maybe Tigerheart was here to try and coax me out of my nest again. But after the voice echoed in my head a couple of times, I realized that it didn't belong to my best friend or my brother.

I stilled my breathing and hopped that Crowfrost would think I was sleeping, and leave me alone. He was the last cat I wanted to face right now. It was hard enough just sitting next to him during Hailpaw's training sessions.

Crowfrost snorted. "Oh, come on, Dawnpelt. I'm not a newborn kit, I know what it looks like when you're pretending to be asleep."

If I wasn't in such a slump I might have rolled my eyes. Instead I simply lifted my head and gazed at the clan deputy with watery hazel eyes.

Crowfrost frowned, curious. "Have you been crying?" he must have realized that I wouldn't respond to him because he flicked his tail and said, "Never mind. Come on, Rowanstar wants Littlecloud to give you a check up."

I furrowed my brow and let a frown play across my lips, although my initial surprise wore off soon. I knew it was only a matter of time until my father took notice of my behavior, and did something extreme; sending me to the medicine cat was certainly extreme. However, I wondered why he sent Crowfrost to escort me, instead of escorting me himself.

But instead of being stubborn I decided that I would get away from Crowfrost much faster if I simply followed him. So I did, and tried to ignore how his frosty gaze bore into the side of my head.

 **Dawn Frost**

Littlecloud frowned as he ran his tail against my side. "I don't know what's wrong with you, Dawnpelt. You don't have a fever or a cold, and I can't find any bruises." he looked up. "Are you sure you feel okay? No headache or stomach pains?"

I shook my head, careful not to look the elderly medicine cat in the eye.

Littlecloud's frown deepened. "How odd… what about your appetite? You look like you've lost weight."

I lowered my gaze to my paws and shrugged. _Great StarClan, I hate lying!_

Littlecloud returned his gaze to my side and studied it, as if he could see right through my pelt. Crowfrost stood beside him, and kept his eyes trained firmly on my face. "You've definitely lost weight," Littlecloud murmured. "And your pelt is a bit disheveled as well. It usually gleams, and brags of careful grooming, but it looks like you've neglected your grooming."

Crowfrost snorted, as if the medicine cat made a joke. I didn't waste the energy it took to shoot him a glare, but thankfully Littlecloud didn't mind and did it himself. "Do you mind laying down, Dawnpelt?" he asked. I shook my head and complied.

The small tabby tom nosed along the top of my back, pressing gently on my spine. "Well, I thought there might be something wrong with your back that was causing you discomfort, but that seems to be fine as well."

"She's seemed very weak at our training sessions," Crowfrost suddenly added. "Like she doesn't have any energy."

This time I did shoot the meddling tom a cold look, although I doubted it carried any weight.

"Interesting," Littlecloud murmured. "You definitely need to eat something. I'll go fetch you a piece of fresh-kill." I wanted to protest at the thought of being left alone with Crowfrost, but that would require breaking my silent veil. I was nothing if not stubborn.

Once Littlecloud disappeared through the lip of the den, Crowfrost directed his full attention towards me. "What did I do to you?" he asked, bluntly.

 _Don't you see what you've done to me?_ I thought bitterly. Instead of words I opted for another glare.

Crowfrost rolled his cold blue eyes. "You're sticking with the silent treatment, huh? That's real mature of you."

 _You are the last cat alive who needs to lecture someone on maturity._

"Would you quit being so stubborn and just tell me what I did?" he demanded. "So that I can stop feeling so guilty and you can stop acting like a mute?"

I blinked. _He feels… guilty? No, he must have been lying._ Crowfrost didn't feel guilt. He didn't believe he could do anything wrong.

"Dawnpelt," Crowfrost growled between gritted teeth. I thought there might be more to the threat, but just then Littlecloud appeared, a frog clamped between his jaws.

"Sorry I took so long," Littlecloud apologized, after he dropped the frog at my paws. "This cold weather isn't doing my old bones any favors." he gestured towards the frog. "Here, eat as much of this as you can, and I'll get started grooming your pelt. Maybe if we clean you up a little you'll feel better."

I wasn't opposed to the idea until Crowfrost stepped forward. "I'll do it." he declared.

My eyes widened in horror, whilst Littlecloud simply blinked. "You?" he asked in disbelief. "Why would-"

Just then Snowbird poked her head inside the den. "Littlecloud, could you please give me a quick check-up? Scorchfur is convinced that I need one, and-" she paused when she noticed Crowfrost and myself. "Oh, am I interrupting something?"

 _Yes!_

"No," Crowfrost said, before Littlecloud could reply. He glanced at the small tabby tom and said, "Go ahead and check her out, Littlecloud. I'll take care of Dawnpelt for you."

Snowbird blinked. "You want to take care of Dawnpelt? Really?"

Crowfrost huffed loudly. "Great StarClan, why does that shock everyone?"

 _Um, maybe because we can't stand each other?_ I stared at Littlecloud with wide, hopeful hazel eyes. _Please Littlecloud, please! You know I despise him, please don't put me in this position!_

Littlecloud slowly nodded his head. "Okay, Crowfrost. Be gentle with her, there might be bruises I can't see beneath her pelt." his gaze flickered over to me. "Remember Dawnpelt, eat as much of that frog as you can stomach."

I didn't reply.

Littlecloud left with Snowbird, and once again, I was alone with Crowfrost. The black and white tom didn't hesitate before padding over to my side, although I managed to catch a glimpse of reluctance in his frosty-blue eyes. "You heard the medicine cat," he said in his brisk, deputy-tone. "Start eating."

 _If I do then I'll throw up._ I reminded myself that the easier I cooperated, the faster I could ditch Crowfrost. With that in mind I took a tentative bite out of the frog and waited for a tongue to rasp across my body, dread curling in my stomach. I was definitely going to throw up.

"You're seriously going to let me do this?" Crowfrost asked. His voice was a mixture of disbelief and hope that I would protest.

I merely shrugged. _It's not like I have much of a choice. Littlecloud gave you permission. The permission that you clearly wanted._

Crowfrost was silent for a couple heart-beats and then he scoffed, and the next thing I knew he was smoothing his tongue over my head and ears. Instinctively, I flattened my ears against my head and clenched my eyes tightly shut. Crowfrost, the cat I hated more than anyone else, was grooming me.

I tried not to focus on the fact and continue to eat my frog. It tasted like dirt and dust, but I wasn't surprised. That's all prey had tasted like for days. Maybe it was because of my slump that I couldn't savor prey, or maybe it was because there hadn't been any blue-tailed lizards on the fresh-kill pile.

"I don't understand why you won't talk to anyone."

 _I wouldn't expect you too._

"I mean, apparently I'm the reason you've been acting so depressed, so I guess I understand why you won't talk to me, but what about Olivenose? I passed her on my way over here, chatted with her for a second. She said you've been giving everyone the silent treatment. Why is that?"

 _Because no one would understand. They look at you like you're a StarClan warrior. They wouldn't believe me if I told them what you said. How you hurt me._

 _Oh, how you hurt me…_

 **Dawn Frost**

"Come and see me if anything changes, okay, Dawnpelt?" Littlecloud said, as he laid his tail across my back. I nodded that I would, even though I knew I wouldn't.

"I mean that," the small tabby tom went on. "If you notice any new bruises, or if your stomach starts to hurt - _anything._ Even if you think it's nothing, come see me."

I smiled feebly and nodded again, as I prayed that the elderly medicine cat would finally let me leave.

Crowfrost, who stood beside me, perked his ears. "Oh, wait, Littlecloud. Before we leave, can you give me a check-up? Rowanstar is concerned that I suffer from an illness of the mental variety." I frowned at my paws. _What? What does that mean?_ Littlecloud must have echoed my thoughts because Crowfrost elaborated, "I offered to take Tawnypelt's position as his mate, and he told me to have you check me out when I brought Dawnpelt."

Littlecloud snorted. "Crowfrost, even the most talented medicine cat wouldn't be able to help you."

Had I been in a more cheerful state of mind, I would have laughed.

Crowfrost narrowed his eyes at the medicine cat. "Fine then, be that way. But the next time you're in trouble and you need a big, strong warrior to help you, don't come crying to _me_." Then, with a haughty toss of his head, the ShadowClan deputy spun around and stalked off.

Littlecloud rolled his eyes and mumbled, "He acts like we don't live in a clan full of big, strong warriors." After a second the small medicine wrinkled his nose and said, "He acts like I need a warrior to help me! I'm perfectly capable of-" all of a sudden a bout of coughing shook Littlecloud's shoulders, and I flattened my ears. _Great StarClan, he sounds even worse than Smokefoot!_

Concern must have etched itself onto my features, because once Littlecloud caught sight of my expression he straightened up and flicked his tail briskly. "Don't look at me like that, Dawnpelt. I'm fine, I just have a bit of a cold."

 _"A bit" of a cold? Leaf-bare hasn't been upon us for very long, and he already sounds like he has green-cough._ But who was I to question the medicine cat about how ill he was?

Instead of interrogating Littlecloud (like a spunkier, sassier Dawnpelt might have), I simply nodded, turned around, and headed towards the warriors den. Despite the frog that Littlecloud forced me to eat, I still felt completely drained of energy. Come to think of it, I didn't feel much different at all. A bit more alert, but nothing to brag about. I didn't feel much cleaner either; I was actually convinced that Crowfrost's grooming had the opposite effect on me.

 _Speaking of Crowfrost…_

"Come on," the black-and-white tom, who'd been sitting in front of den waiting for me, ordered. "We're going for a walk."

I eyed him wearily. _Great StarClan, what does he want with me now?_

"Rowanstar ordered it," Crowfrost elaborated. "He said that being cramped in the warriors den all day wasn't going to do you any good, so he wants you to take a walk, stretch your legs a bit. He wants me to go with you to make sure you actually get some exercise."

I wanted to be annoyed; I really, really did. Especially since I still trained with Crowfrost and Hailpaw everyday, although admittedly, all I really did these days was sit there and stare at my paws. But I didn't have the energy or will to protest my father's orders, so instead I simply sighed and gestured for Crowfrost to take the lead.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

No narrowing of the eyes, no bristling of the fur along her spine. _Maybe she's not the real Dawnpelt,_ I thought to myself, as we padded silently through the pine forest. _Maybe she's a clone of Dawnpelt. Yeah, that's it. The Dark Forest stole the real Dawnpelt and replaced her with this mute clone, because they want to torture me. That's reasonable, isn't it?_

 _No, it isn't. How could the Dark Forest possibly clone a cat?_

 _Shut-up,_ I snapped at my conscious. _It was just a theory._

 _It was a horrible theory. What makes you think the Dark Forest would go through all the work of kidnapping Dawnpelt, cloning her, and then sending you her clone as a means of torture? What makes you so special?_

 _'What makes you so special?' Are you serious right now? Do you even **know** who you're the conscious of? Why, I bet all the other consciences **wished** they were my conscious!_

 _Actually we all wish we were Scorchfur's conscious. He's very well-behaved._

"Scorchfur?!" I exclaimed, accidentally out loud. Dawnpelt raised her head to stare at me strangely, but lowered her gaze to her paws when we made eye contact. I growled lowly, thoroughly annoyed and embarrassed. _Have you ever noticed how utterly useless you are?_ I demanded. _You've never helped me do anything worthwhile! Not a single thing!_

 _That's because you're too stubborn to accept my help!_ My conscious retorted sassily. _You always brush off my suggestions, like when I said to apologize to Dawnpelt._

 _It was a stupid suggestion,_ I replied easily. _I can't apologize to her when I don't know what I did in the first place._

 _Why not? I think it's worth a shot._

 _Oh, you do, do you?_ I mused, not particularly interested in where our conversation was heading. Instead I developed a rapidly increasing interest in my surroundings. The pine trees still had a majority of their prickly green needles attached, although the few birch trees that were scattered throughout ShadowClan had already died. The marshy ground was squishy and cold underneath my paws, and if I weren't so adapt to the territory I'm sure I would have been disgusted.

The breeze picked up and I shivered; it was only the beginning of leaf-bare, and yet it was already so cold…

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed that the breeze didn't seem to bother Dawnpelt in the slightest. I examined her pelt and then wrinkled my nose ruefully. "You're lucky," I remarked.

The creamy-colored warrior raised her head and look at me with dull hazel eyes; still, I had her attention.

"You're pelt," I gestured to her body with my head. "It's fluffy and thick. The weather won't bother you for another moon or so. Meanwhile, I'm over here shivering every time the wind picks up because my pelt is so short and sleek."

Dawnpelt didn't seem impressed with my discovery, so I went on.

"But I guess having such a thick pelt can have its downsides, can't it? Like during green-leaf, I bet you hate basking in the sunlight. Or… or like when you fell into the lake! You're pelt is so thick that the weight pulled you down, whereas I didn't have the weight holding me down."

Dawnpelt shrugged, somewhat agreeably. This was probably the longest conversation we'd ever had without wanting to go at each other's' throats. But, then again, it was incredibly one-sided.

"I wonder where you got such a thick pelt from," I wondered aloud. "Rownstar and Tawnypelt don't have short fur, but it's not long and fluffy either. Tigerheart has thick fur, but it's not fluffy. Maybe you're just the freak of the family?" I paused for a second before a new thought occurred to me. "Hey, didn't Flametail have thick, fluffy fur?"

The question clearly made Dawnpelt uncomfortable. Her steps faltered for a second and she lowered her gaze again. Nonetheless, she nodded.

A frown tugged at my lips. "Huh. So you're not the family freak. Pity." I half-hopped that the comment would get a rise out of Dawnpelt, but I wasn't surprised when she hardly reacted. "Well, maybe your grandparents had thick, fluffy fur. I don't know much about Rowanstar's heritage, but when I was apprenticed to him, there was a rumor floating around that Russetfur and Blackstar were his parents. It would make sense, they both had your pelt-type, and it would explain where Rowanstar got his coloring. Plus, I always thought there was something between Blackstar and Russetfur, and they always seemed to favor Rowanstar."

I sighed loudly. "But that's just a rumor, so I guess I can't base my answer solely on that. There's always Tawnypelt's heritage, but that's a bit murky. Everyone knows her father was Tigerstar, but I don't know who her mother was; just that she was a ThunderClan queen. I never properly met Tigerstar - _thank StarClan_ \- so I don't know how fluffy his pelt was. I doubt it was a fluffy as yours though, otherwise no one would have taken him very seriously. Could you imagine a fluffy poofball taking over clans or challenging clan leaders to battle? I don't know how they could have fought him with a straight face."

And then, finally, Dawnpelt reacted to something I said. It wasn't much of a reaction at all; all she did was narrow her hazel eyes and flick her tail, but it was progress.

"I guess the whereabouts of your thick, fluffy pelt will forever remain a mystery," I said, and heaved a very depressed sigh. "Maybe I could interrogate Rowanstar, see if there's any truth behind the whole 'Blackstar/Russetfur' rumor. I always wanted to ask him as an apprentice if the rumors were true, but Blackstar and Russetfur were still very alive and very intimidating at the time, and Smokefoot and I got into enough trouble as it was. So, you know, best not go snooping where we weren't wanted. But now that they're dead…" I trailed off thoughtfully. "Then again, if my investigating annoyed them they could always come back and haunt me. Do you think StarClan warriors are above that? Haunting cats?"

I didn't expect an answer, and I didn't hold out much hope for a reaction either. It was just as well because I received neither.

 _Well, this is going terribly._

 _Maybe if you would just suck up your pride and apologize to her already…_

I huffed, exasperated. _Apologize for what?_ Somewhere in the pits of my stomach, a slowly burning ember sparked a flame.

 _For hurting her, obviously._

 _I didn't do anything to her!_ That flame started to grow into a small fire.

 _Just because you don't know what you did does not make you innocent._

 _I'm not apologizing when I don't know what I'm supposed to be apologizing for!_ And that small fire continued to grow until it was raging and furious. _Why don't you-_

 _Can't you suck up your pride for two seconds-_

 _Can't she?_

 _She didn't hurt you!_

 _I didn't hurt her!_

 _Apologize!_

 _NO!_

 _NOW!_

"I'm sorry!" I shouted, as I rounded on Dawnpelt. Her hazel eyes widened with an emotion kin to disbelief as I rushed on, desperate to get the words off my tongue forever. "Whatever it is I did, whatever it is that's made you so depressed, _I'm sorry_! I didn't- I don't- I have no idea what I did to hurt you like this, but I never meant to."

She stared at me, unblinking and stunned as I finished. "I don't care what I've said in the past, or what I've done to you before, but this - _this_ \- was never my intention."

The creamy-colored she-cat was either still giving me the silent treatment or I'd seriously stunned her, because she continued to respond with silence. Finally I couldn't handle it anymore and I snarled, "For StarClan's sake, say something already!"

And then something wonderful happened. A series of emotions flashed across her face like lightning in the sky, and she twitched her whiskers, then her ears, she flicked her tail tip; she was _reacting._ I was so relieved that I didn't even care when the series stopped, and she finally settled on an expression of cold fury.

"You _still_ don't know what you did to me?"

I laughed and shook my head. I must have gone crazy, laughing and grinning like a fool, but it was all I could do.

Dawnpelt didn't seem to share my amusement. "I overheard you and Smokefoot mocking me." she growled. "Do you know- well, clearly you don't. You will never understand how much that hurt me."

My grin faded and my laughed ceased. I was so surprised that the breeze could have brushed past and I would have fallen over. _Wait… Smokefoot and Scorchfur were right?!_ "That's what hurt you," I cried in disbelief. "But I've said worse things about you to your face before!"

"Yes," Dawnpelt agreed coldly. " _To my face._ But you did this behind my back. That implies that you have absolutely no respect for me - not that I thought you ever did, but this was simply proof - and it hit me that you don't simply insult me to my face. You mock me for amusement, as a pleasurable pastime." her eyes were as cold as her voice when she meowed, "Go ahead and deny it, _I dare you_."

A less relieved Crowfrost would be annoyed with Dawnpelt. He would hate the sass and confidence in her tone, he would hate the way her hazel eyes burned through his own blue ones. He would wish she were mute.

But at that moment, I was a totally different Crowfrost. Maybe it was because we both knew I couldn't deny her accusation so I tried to catch her off guard, or maybe all that relief had simply gone to my head, because for whatever reason, instead of arguing with her, I stepped forward and buried my face into her neck. "I'm _so_ glad you're back to normal," I murmured.

Dawnpelt stiffened and I couldn't help but smirk against her pelt. _Gotcha._

"Get off of me," she growled, although her voice quivered. Clearly the affection gesture shook her nerves. I complied easily because it wasn't like I wanted to cuddle with her, and backed up a couple steps.

"I'm being serious," I meowed. "I'm really, _really_ glad to have you back. I don't think you understand the torture you've put me through this past half-moon."

Dawnpelt scoffed, skeptical. " _I've_ been torturing _you_? Please."

I shook my head quickly. "No, it's true! It's been terrible! You wouldn't look at me, wouldn't speak to me - or to anyone, actually. It was like… like the Dark Forest kidnapped you, made a mute clone of you, and sent the clone back to ShadowClan, just to mess with me."

 _You're an idiot._

 _Shut-up._

The beautiful warrior eyed me wearily. "You're an idiot."

 _Hah._

 _I thought I told you to shut-up?_

Outwardly I shrugged. "Okay, I guess I deserve that _from you_." But not from anyone else, and certainly not a _nosy, no-good conscious!_ "Come on; we should start back to camp. We've been walking for ages, by the time we get back the moon will be out."

I started to take the lead but Dawnpelt was quick to cut me off. "I'll be leading the way home," she said cooly, with a haughty flick of her tail.

A different Crowfrost - one who would rather claw Dawnpelt than nuzzle her, and who would rather protest than accept her insult - would have growled and shoved his way in front of the she-cat. But for the time being that was a different Crowfrost, and this one was content to step back and let her have her way.

 **Dawn Frost**

The question had been present in my mind ever since Dawnpelt told me why she'd been so depressed. We still had a ways to go before we arrived back at camp, and I wasn't fond of silence anyways. "That wasn't the only reason, was it?"

The creamy-colored she-cat glanced at me. "What wasn't?"

"You said that you became depressed because you overheard me mocking you, and it hurt you," I elaborated, as a frown creased my brow. "But surely that isn't the _only_ reason you became so depressed. There's no way it affected you that much."

Dawnpelt flicked an ear. "Don't underestimate the power one's words carry."

"Dawnpelt."

She sighed, almost in defeat. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Come on," I pressed. "Do you think I wanted to apologize to you? Just… tonight, let's be totally honest with each other."

She was silent for a few long moments, and then she said, "No, you're right. It wasn't the only reason. I… I know that most cats find me hard to get along with. They think I'm too bossy, too ambitious, too intelligent, too much. They want me to be just a pretty face, they want me to be kinder, sweeter, more friendly. They want me to stop being so stubborn and so prideful, to settle down with a tom already. It bothers them that I'm so outspoken and independent."

"That's not true," I spoke up. "Ivytail and Olivenose are both stubborn and prideful, and everyone likes them just fine."

"Because Ivytail is wise and has produced many successful apprentices, and Olivenose is a social butterfly; cats can't help but want to be her friend. I don't have the life experience that Ivytail has to be considered wise, and I'm not as outgoing or as friendly as Olivenose."

I opened my jaws to protest again, before I thought better of it and closed them. We'd agreed to be completely honest with each other, and if this was something that Dawnpelt felt needed to be said, then I could listen.

"I'm not saying that this mindset applies to ShadowClan; for the most part, they accept me and my personality. A few of the senior warriors aren't fond of me, but they don't give me a hard time. I know the elders disapprove of my independence, but they disapprove of everything younger warriors do. It's the other three clans that can't stand me." _'Can't stand me'._

"That's a harsh accusation."

Dawnpelt shrugged. "But a true one. I know, I've heard them whisper. ThunderClan especially…" she trailed off, and I knew she must be re-visiting the memory of when she stood up at a Gathering and accused Jayfeather of murdering Flametail. "Anyway… the point is, I know I'm not everyone's favorite cat. I know that there are a lot of cats who wouldn't mind if I just suddenly vanished - she-cats mostly, for petty reasons, but still. When I heard you mocking me, and Smokefoot going along with it, I realized that that must be how everyone else see's me too."

"Not everyone-"

"Most everyone," Dawnpelt corrected herself. "And then… I suppose there's something else that contributed to my depression, but I-"

"-Promised to be honest be with me," I interrupted her gently, and reminded her of the truce.

Uncertainty swam in her hazel eyes. "Crowfrost, it's-... I really don't want to talk about it."

"It'll be good for you!" I said, with a forced cheerfulness. "You know, talking about it with someone, getting it out in the open."

"I've already talked about it with Tigerheart, and that did me very little good."

"Maybe the more you talk about it the better you'll feel?" I suggested.

For a minute I thought Dawnpelt was going to continue to reject the topic, but much to my surprise and delight, she finally gave in. "Alright, you win. What do you… what do you remember about Flametail?"

The question caught me off guard. "Not very much, since he trained as a medicine cat. He was respectful, courteous; very focused on his training, sorta like you were. Intelligent but not incredibly ambitious. And, um… he had a very orange pelt." A new thought occurred to me. "It seemed like you and Tigerheart were very close to him, and each other. After his death you blocked out everyone out and became miserable. It wasn't until that Gathering, that you returned to your usual self." Now that I made the connection, I realized that Dawnpelt had acted a lot like she had when she became depressed.

Dawnpelt nodded. "I know I accused Jayfeather of his murder, but that was just how I choose to deal with the grief; denial. I convinced myself that Jayfeather was to blame for his death, but…" she trailed off and then swallowed thickly. "Inwardly, I've always known that he would still be alive if I hadn't had pressured him to join me and Olivenose on the ice."

My first instinct was to rush forward and protest; she was wrong, obviously. But I forced myself to slow down, and actually think about what she was saying. She did have a valid point; she and Olivenose begged Flametail to play their game with them on the ice. Flametail had denied their offer, and said that he had work to do. But Dawnpelt pressured him… she convinced him… he didn't want to, but he gave into his littermate's wishes and… paid for it with his life.

My heart missed a beat. _It's Dawnpelt's fault that Flametail is dead._

"I murdered my brother," she whispered, her words no louder than a breath.

For once, I couldn't find a reason to argue with her.

"It was a thought that always lingered in the back of my mind, but I never really acknowledged it until I fell into the lake at the Gathering. When I realized that I was drowning, I was reminded of Flametail's death, and then I… I heard his voice." she flattened her ears and looked away, partly out of sadness, and partly out of embarrassment because she must've realized how crazy she sounded.

And crazy she did sound.

"He said that it was ironic that he couldn't save me, just like how I couldn't save him… he sounded so bitter…" simultaneously we both stopped walking, as if we'd planned it. "I was so scared, and then, when he told me it was my time to join StarClan…" she shook her head, at a loss for words.

"How do you know it was Flametail's voice you were hearing?" I asked. "Maybe it was just the lack of oxygen getting to your head?"

Dawnpelt sighed and lowered her gaze. "That's what Tigerheart said too. But I _know_ Flametail's voice; I know it just as well as I know my own. There's no way I was imagining it."

She sounded pretty convinced, and since Dawnpelt seemed to be resorting back to her regular personality, I figured I didn't stand much chance of talking her out of it. And who knows - maybe she really did hear his voice? Best to just go along with it, for now. "So that's what forced you to accept… _it_ , huh?"

The creamy-colored she-cat shrugged meekly. "It's pretty hard to keep denying the truth once your dead brother speaks to you about it, and basically forces you to."

"True, that would be hard to ignore," I agreed with her. "And mixed with what you overheard me say, I would say that you had a very justified reason for becoming depressed." She realized that the majority of the four clans hated her, and she was forced to accept the fact that she was a murderer. When I thought about it, I was surprised that she'd been depressed for only a half-moon. Heck, I was amazed that she'd only been _depressed_ \- a lesser warrior would have gone to extremes to escape the realizations she'd been dealing with.

The thought sent a shiver down my spine, and this time it wasn't from the cold breeze that brushed past us.

"Well, thanks," Dawnpelt replied dryly. "I'm glad you think so."

"What are you going to do about it?" I asked curiously. "Anything?"

She exhaled heavily. "What can I do about it? It's not like I can go back in time and get off the ice."

I hesitated for a second because I knew she wasn't going to like my suggestion, but finally I said, "You could always apologize to Jayfeather."

 _Hypocrite._

 _Seriously, shut-up._

Dawnpelt snorted. "Right. And this is coming from _you_."

"Exactly!" I exclaimed. "It's coming from _me_ \- the cat who apologized and is now guilt free! Trust me, it sucks, but depending on how badly you feel, it's worth it."

The disdain that had settled on her features gave way to a look of soft despair. She sighed and looked away from me, and focused her gaze on the pines. "I've thought about it," she admitted quietly. "But there's no way he would accept it. Jayfeather is known for his sharp tongue and his ability to hold a grudge. And, more recently, our mutual hatred towards each other. Besides," she shrugged weakly. "It takes more than just an apology after you've accused someone of murder. I nearly ruined his life when I got him suspended from his duties."

She had a point.

"Well… just think about it," I finally meowed. "Maybe if the perfect opportunity arises-?"

She shrugged again. "Maybe." She didn't sound incredibly hopeful. I couldn't say I blamed her.

 **Dawn Frost**

ShadowClan warriors were the night owls of the four clans, and it wasn't long until we started running into our clanmates. They were surprised to see Dawnpelt and I together, on our own free will, acting civil with each other, but they kept their comments to themselves. Best not to say the wrong thing and ruin the miracle. I think a lot of them were simply relieved that Dawnpelt seemed to be coming out of her slump, although they wondered how _I_ of all cats managed to pull her out of it.

We approached the camp entrance where Stoatfur stood guard. Her brown eyes brightened with curiosity when she noticed the pair of us together, seemingly friendly, but the soft-spoken she-cat wasn't one to pry into the business of others, so she let us past with a simple nod of her head.

"Tonight was interesting," I remarked, after I returned the greeting.

Dawnpelt hummed. "I'm not sure interesting is the right word."

"Regardless of what you'd call it, I think it was interesting. And… as morbid as some of the topics we discussed may have been, I didn't hate talking to you."

"What a coincidence; I didn't hate talking to you either, for once."

Our clanmates brushed past us, some heading towards the fresh-kill pile, others towards the patch of comfy pine needles we liked to share tongues on. Some disappeared through the entrance to enjoy a stroll through the night, maybe try to catch a piece of prey. One or two cats settled in the Warriors Den, choosing to retire early. Dawnpelt and I would be among those rare few. Dawnpelt because she'd never been much of a night owl, unlike the rest of the clan. Me because, well, when you got up before the sun you tended to go to sleep a little earlier than the majority.

"You know," I started softly. "Our truce doesn't have to end tonight."

Clouds drifted across the she-cat's hazel orbs. "I was just thinking the same thing. But… a friendship? Between _us_? There's no way it'd last."

"You never know unless you try, right?"

"You'd miss arguing with me too much."

I scoffed. "Right, because _I'm_ the only reason we argue. It's not like _you provoke me_ at all."

Dawnpelt looked at me with an expression that screamed _'I told you so'_. "See? That lasted all of three seconds."

"That's because we never made the truce official!" I protested. "Ugh, look. If we actually tried to get along with each other and put some effort into this, I don't think it's so impossible. At the very least, Hailpaw will benefit with us on the same wavelength." _Gotcha._ She would do anything for Hailpaw.

I watched as her hesitance faded when I mentioned the blue-eyed apprentice. Finally she said, "Alright. I guess we don't have anything to lose, do we?"

"Maybe a few of our clanmates when they have heart-attacks, but that's a minor casualty; a small price to pay."

Dawnpelt cracked a small smile; the first I'd seen ever since her downward spiral. I couldn't help but swell with pride when I realized that I was the first cat to make her smile since her depression. _Me._ The cat she supposedly hated ever since… since anyone could remember. _Is there anything I cannot do?_

No. No there wasn't.

"I'm going to sleep for the night," she announced softly. She lingered around for a second, clearly uncomfortable and unsure, but she finally asked, "Are you staying out a little longer, or-?"

"Yeah, but just for awhile. I have to talk to Owlclaw about taking Cloverpaw out with Hailpaw tomorrow."

Maybe Dawnpelt wasn't completely back to normal just yet, because she was usually very observant, and would have noticed that Owlclaw wasn't even in the camp. Instead of picking up on the white lie, she managed another small smile and ducked her head, and then turned around and headed towards the den. I sat down and watched her leave, and pondered the strange feeling that was building in my chest. Not quite an ache, but…

"There's something I thought I'd never see. You two actually looked friendly with each other."

I shrugged. "It was an interesting night. Truces were forged and progress was made."

"I guess there really is a first for everything."

I glanced at him. "Did I miss anything while I was out?"

Smokefoot shook his head. "Just Scorchfur hovering over Snowbird, and lots of awkward flirting between Owlclaw and Olivenose."

I blinked in surprise. "Owlclaw and Olivenose were flirting? And it was _awkward_?" My former apprentice was anything but awkward, and was quite skilled in the arts of flirting. She should be; she had an amazing mentor.

The smoke-colored tom shot me a grin. "Well, it was really only Owlclaw that was awkward. Olivenose didn't seem to notice that he was trying to flirt though, so he was spared the embarrassment, thank StarClan." After a moment he added, "I feel bad for him. He's clearly head over paws for her, and she's clearly uninterested in him."

 _But we all know who she is head over paws for,_ I thought to myself. Olivenose and I actually had a fling, once upon a time. But there was just something _off_ about being mates with your former apprentice, and our relationship only lasted a couple days. Still, once you had a taste of Crowfrost, you never wanted anything else.

"Speaking of unrequited feelings," I started pointedly. "Have you spoken to Applefur yet? Have you told her that you'd sooner die than be mates with a Dark Forest traitor?"

Smokefoot rolled his dark blue eyes. "There's no need. Applefur doesn't like me; she only helps me when Littlecloud orders her to. Actually, rumor has it that she has a thing for Starlingwing." The longing note in his tone did not go unmissed by me.

I narrowed my eyes. "She doesn't have feelings for you? I'll kill her."

Smokefoot scoffed. "So she's not allowed to have feelings for me, but if she doesn't then you're going to kill her. Because that's not hypocritical at all."

"I'm the deputy of ShadowClan. I'm allowed to be hypocritical."

"I don't think that's how that works," Smokefoot replied.

"Then don't think," I retorted.

Smokefoot tried to cuff me over the ear but I ducked just in time, and then re-arised and shot him a grin. "Missed me."

"I'll get you when you're not expecting it," he promised me. Then he glanced at the darkening sky and asked, "Isn't it past your bedtime?"

I smiled meekly. "I was waiting for Dawnpelt to get comfortable and fall asleep. I needed to think about a couple things before we talked again."

Smokefoot raised an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? What kind of things?"

I flicked my tail. "Nothing important. I'll tell you later, so that I don't have to repeat myself when I tell Scorchfur."

The large, dark gray tom shrugged. "Okay, but good luck getting a word in. Odds are, he's going to complain about Snowbird until our ears fall off tomorrow. I swear, with the way he's acting you'd think he was the one about to give birth."

"That's our Scorchfur!" I exclaimed proudly. Then I leaned forward and placed a swift lick on Smokefoot's cheek. "G'night. I'll pester you tomorrow."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

I rose to my paws and started towards the Warriors Den when Smokefoot called my name. I glanced back and asked, "Yeah?"

Smokefoot looked at me curiously. "Have things changed between you and Dawnpelt?"

It was a loaded question, in my humble opinion. The simple answer was 'yes', because of our decision to test a friendship. But for some reason, the question seemed to carry a deeper meaning. So I shrugged and said, "I don't know." And then continued on my merry way.

The first thing I noticed when I entered the den was Dawnpelt's sleeping form. She looked much more at peace than she'd been in awhile. The sight filled me with relief.

 _You lied._

 _Not technically,_ I responded, and kept my frosty-blue gaze trained on the she-cat. _It was a two-part question. Did things change? Yes. What changed? I don't know yet._

 _You have a friendship._

 _But it doesn't feel that simple._

Something definitely changed between Dawnpelt and myself. But what exactly was it? And was it for better, or for worse?

So many questions, and not nearly enough answers.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **What's your favorite Warriors super edition?**

 **#Crookedstar's Promise**

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 **Considering I had a piece of this chapter pre-written from part one, I really thought I'd have this out sooner. However I've suffered from a terrible writer's block as of late, what with finals and typical high school drama. Thankfully I'm nearly done with my finals and all drama has been resolved, so my motivation seems to have kicked back in :)**

 **Summer vacation is officially twelve days away, so hopefully I'll be able to spend more time writing! Wouldn't it be amazing if we finished DF before school started back up? (Don't get your hopes up, that's such an ambitious goal that it's not even a goal of mine).**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	7. Sometimes the Truth is Worse Than a Lie

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

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 **Chapter Seven - Sometimes t** **he Truth is Worse Than a Lie**

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 **"** **Sometimes people don't want to hear the truth because they don't want their illusions destroyed.** **" -** **Friedrich Nietzsche**

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 **Crowfrost's POV**

Being the deputy of ShadowClan has its perks. You don't have to patrol if you don't want to; you're given information before most of the clan; you're involved in important decision making; and you're highly respected/admired/envied by nearly every average warrior. However, there are still some things that are not acceptable, no matter who you are or what your rank is.

" _Pleaseee_ Crowfrosty-face? Just one hunting trip?"

Unfortunately, murder is one of those things.

" _Ferretclaw_ ," I growled through gritted teeth. "I swear on StarClan, if you don't stop following me around camp and pestering me than I'm going to _murder you_." Of course I couldn't keep good on my threat for previously stated reasons, but I hoped that the threat would be enough to hurt Ferretclaw's feelings so that he would leave me alone.

But instead of gasping or flattening his ears against his head, the stupid warrior had the _nerve_ to _laugh_ at me! "Come on Crowfrost, we both know you're not serious!"

Keep following me around and we'll see how serious I am.

 _No one would miss him if I killed him,_ I mused to myself, as the gray and cream tom rambled on about what great friends we were.

 _That's not true,_ my conscious replied. _Besides, murder goes against the Warrior Code._

 _See, the thing about the Warrior Code is that it's really more like a set of guidelines than anything else; they're not set in stone._

 _Again, not true. If you were to murder Ferretclaw then Rowanstar would demote you as his deputy._

I sighed, sorrowfully. _It would almost be worth it…_

"Crowfrostyfrost? Are you listening to me?" Suddenly the blue-eyed warrior gasped. "Great StarClan, you've fallen asleep with your eyes open! You must have some kind of rare sleeping disorder! Don't worry Crowfrost, I'll go fetch Littlecloud for you!"

"What? Ferretclaw I'm not-!" But it was too late. Ferretclaw had already darted towards Littlecloud's den, kicking up pine needles as he ran. I huffed, amazed at the stupidity that tom possessed, before I realized that this was my chance to escape.

I quickly scanned the camp for Dawnpelt so that we could make a run for it; Hailpaw and his sisters, along with their mentors, had already left for the training hollow. We were supposed to join them once I sorted patrols.

"Looking for me?"

I spun around and came to face-to-face with Dawnpelt. She smiled a bit uneasily at me, and hesitancy shone in her hazel eyes. I guessed she still wasn't convinced that a friendship between us was possible, but I had bigger things to worry about at that moment; like escaping the stupidest, most annoying tom I'd ever met.

Without so much as a 'hello' I started shoving the creamy-colored she-cat towards the camp entrance despite her protests, promising to explain later.

 **Dawn Frost**

"He's so annoying!" I exclaimed. "He's convinced that we're best friends, no matter how often I tell him I would rather eat a fox's eyeballs than spend time with him."

Dawnpelt wrinkled her muzzle in disgust. "Ew."

"I absolutely mean it," I said gravely. "He's been on his new kick for the past moon, where he tries to get me to go on a hunting trip with him; just him. He thinks that since I go hunting with Smokefoot and Scorchfur all the time, we should do the same."

The gorgeous warrior flicked an ear. "Tell him 'no'."

"I have told him 'no'!" I shouted. "I've told him 'no' so many times that I've lost count! I've even gotten creative with how I say it; today I told him I wouldn't go hunting with him even if he was the last cat alive."

Curious, Dawnpelt asked, "And what did he say?"

I rolled my frost-colored eyes. "He said "Well, if I was the last cat alive then of course we wouldn't go hunting, because you'd be dead"."

"He has a point," Dawnpelt said agreeably. "Maybe you should just give in and agree to go with him."

"Again, I would rather eat a fox's eyeballs than spend time with Ferretclaw."

"Again, that's disgusting."

 _I agree with Dawnpelt._

 _Shut-up. No one asked for your opinion._

"You know," she started casually. "For all you know you could be avoiding a major event in your life. What if you go hunting with Ferretclaw, and you realize that he isn't so bad after all, and the two of you fall in love and become mates?"

I stopped dead in my tracks and looked at the she-cat with an expression of wide-eyed horror. "Y-you can't be serious," I sputtered.

But Dawnpelt's expression was one of grim determination; the picture of seriousness. "I'm dead serious. I think you two would make an adorable couple."

"Me and Ferretclaw?!" I cried. "That's even more disgusting than eating a fox's eyeball! That's- I don't know why- I can't even think-!" I stopped when I realized that Dawnpelt was purring loudly, and an amused smile had played across her lips. I scowled at her. "You're not funny. You may think you are, but you're not."

 _I think she's very funny._

 _Again, shut-up._

Dawnpelt purred even louder. "You should have seen your face; you looked horrified!"

"That's because I was horrified!" I wanted to stay angry at the she-cat, but when her smile only widened I realized that I was fighting back a smile of my own. _No, don't smile at her and let her think that kind of teasing is okay. It is most definitely not okay!_

"Lighten up," She rebuked me, as we resumed walking once more. The training hollow was in sight, where Ivytail and Owlclaw sat with the apprentices.

I snorted. " _You're_ telling _me_ to lighten up? Hypocrite; you're the most uptight cat in the clan!"

The amusement died in Dawnpelt's eyes. "No, _I'm not_ ," she growled softly. "I know how to loosen up and have fun too, I just happen to take my duties as a warrior more seriously than you do."

"Is that why you pad around camp with a permanent frown on your face? I can count the number of times I've ever seen you smile."

"What if I just don't smile around you because I don't _enjoy_ being around you," Dawnpelt retorted.

I shrugged stiffly. "I can't imagine why; I'm a joy to be around."

"Maybe it's because you're an arrogant, rude, disrespectful-" she stopped abruptly to inhale a breath, and then breathe it out. When she looked at me again she was calmer, although a sort of fire still burned in her hazel orbs. "We should hurry up. Ivytail and Owlclaw are waiting for us." And then she sped up, without waiting for my response.

I watched her go for a second before I increased my pace as well. I thought back to moments ago, when Dawnpelt had been purring and amusement was clear in her eyes. She'd relaxed, she was smiling. It was nice, to not argue with her for once.

 _Well. It was nice while it last._ Was Dawnpelt right? Was a friendship between us so impossible after all?

 **Dawn Frost**

I knew that Owlclaw and Ivytail had brought the apprentices down to the training hollow, but I didn't expect Tawnypelt and Ashpaw to be with them. Judging by Dawnpelt's surprised expression, neither did she.

"Tawnypelt," I greeted the she-cat. "To what do I owe this unexpected pleasure?"

"Suck-up," Owlclaw mumbled.

Tawnypelt shot the younger warrior an amused look before she directed her attention towards me. "I heard you were introducing the apprentices to battle training today, and I thought Ashpaw and I could help."

The dark gray she-cat, daughter of the deceased Cederheart and Tallpoppy, looked at me with admiration in her blue eyes. "Tawnypelt and I have been working on my battle moves for almost an entire moon; she says I'm a natural."

I'd seen Ashpaw practice her moves before, and although I wouldn't call her a natural, I would admit that she was coming along very well. Of course, she was two moons old than Hailpaw and his littermates, so it wouldn't be hard to look like a natural when compared to them. Nonetheless I nodded and said, "Then I'm sure you'll be very helpful today. Since there's only three apprentices and we'll be working with partners, you can be Hailpaw's partner."

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Hailpaw's eyes widen with delight, and he grinned. Ashpaw also looked rather excited to be paired with the pale gray tom, and I couldn't help that smirk that played across my lips. _Huh. So that's how you get Hailpaw to show a little emotion; you pair him with his crush._

Cloverpaw must have noticed the same thing I did, because she smirked as well and leaned over to whisper something in her brother's ear. Hailpaw jerked away from her and narrowed his eyes, clearly not pleased with whatever she'd said, although I detected a bit of embarrassment in his eyes.

"Ivytail," I gestured for the senior warrior to take my place in front of the apprentices. "Why don't you explain this move?" I didn't necessarily want to give up my control over the training session, but apparently Ivytail had complained about how I was too controlling during our sessions. Frankly I thought this was rather hypocritical of her, considering one of the reasons we split was because she was too controlling, but for the sake of peace I would try to corporate with my former fling.

A look of surprise flashed across Ivytail's face, but she nodded and took my place without complaint.

"Alright," she started. "Before we start teaching you anything, you have to understand the most important skills that any good fighter needs."

Whilst the black-and-white tortoiseshell she-cat continued, I took a seat next to Tawnypelt. The senior warrior was silent for a few heart-beats as she listened to Ivytail's lecture, but eventually leaned over and whispered, "I heard something interesting about you the other day."

"Oh?" I mused, still focused on Ivytail.

Tawnypelt nodded. "Uh-huh. Apparently, I have some competition for Rowanstar." I blinked, caught off guard for a moment, before I remembered what I had accidently blurted out when I'd talked to Rowanstar yesterday. Of course I hadn't actually meant it, and I figured Tawnypelt only brought it up to tease me.

Playing along I sighed sorrowfully, and said, "No, unfortunately you don't have much competition. He's very happy with you."

"I would hope so," Tawnypelt replied. "But then again, he _has_ been blowing me off quite a lot lately for his new duties."

I flicked an ear. "Ah, well. I'm sure if you just lecture him one good time about how you're supposed to treat your mate, he'll never ditch you again."

Tawnypelt smiled briefly. "I might just try that." The tortoiseshell she-cat glanced at me before saying, "You know, you would make a wonderful mate if you'd only learn how to settle down."

"And where's the fun in settling down?"

"It's more fun than you may think," she replied. I merely grunted in response and devoted my full attention to Ivytail's lecture. By this point she'd recruited Dawnpelt to serve as her partner as she demonstrated the move the apprentices would have to learn.

Almost unwilling, I found myself focusing completely on Dawnpelt; it was much easier to admire her, now that we were testing a friendship. The creamy-colored she-cat moved so effortlessly, so gracefully. Her strikes were quick and precise, and her reflexes were sharp. Looking at her, it was nearly impossible to tell that she'd been depressed just yesterday. The only sign that might indicate otherwise was her weight; she was thinner, but her pelt was practically glowing once more. Clearly she'd spent a lot of time grooming it before we left the camp.

Tawnypelt must have followed my gaze because she said, "Dawnpelt looks good this morning; she's been acting weird the past half-moon."

"So I heard," I mumbled.

"Rowanstar and I were worried about her," Tawnypelt went on. "She was acting a lot like she did when-..." the senior warrior trailed off and I had to fight to keep my expression schooled; I knew what she meant. "Anyway, I'm glad she seems to have shaken her slump off."

"Me too," I replied immediately, which earned me a strange look from Tawnypelt. I didn't bother trying to conceal my eye roll as I added, "Yes, I care about Dawnpelt's wellbeing. Big shock, I know."

"You know, I think Snowbird mentioned you two yesterday. She said you'd escorted Dawnpelt to Littlecloud, and acted very concerned over her. Honestly I thought her pregnancy hormones might have been acting up, making her see things that weren't really there, but I guess she was telling the truth."

I couldn't help but make a face. "I mean, we aren't best friends or anything, but I didn't enjoy seeing her so depressed. It was actually quite horrifying, to see her so drained. She wouldn't argue with me or anything!"

"What a pity," Tawnypelt remarked.

What a pity it had been, indeed.

 **Dawn Frost**

By this time Ivytail had finished her lecture, and we split up into groups. Cloverpaw and Honeypaw were partners, and Hailpaw and Ashpaw were partners.

"Remember," Owlclaw spoke sternly to Cloverpaw. "Keep your claws sheathed at all times!"

The gray apprentice rolled her bright green eyes. "I know, I know. You've reminded me three times now!"

"You have a tendency to forget orders you didn't want to follow in the first place," Owlclaw responded dryly.

Hailpaw, who'd been paying attention to his sister and her mentor, turned to look at Ashpaw. "I promise I won't unsheathe my claws on you," he declared.

The dark gray she-cat smirked in return. "Thanks, although I can't say I'll do the same for you."

Weariness crept into the apprentice's gaze, and he glanced at me, as if asking for assistance. I shrugged and said, "She's a she-cat, Hailpaw. You should just accept the fact that she'll do what she wants, and try not to get injured in the process."

Hailpaw blinked owlishly, and then whispered to himself, " _Try not to get injured_?"

I grinned and started the session. "So, you heard what Ivytail said. For this battle move you'll need to use your size to your advantage, since you couldn't possibly use brute force to knock an enemy warrior down." I nodded at Ashpaw. "You'll be the enemy warrior, and Hailpaw, your goal is to trip her up."

Both apprentices nodded, although I noticed that Hailpaw didn't look very happy. I imagined that he wasn't looking forward to hurting the pretty she-cat.

They got into their positions, and started circling each other. Ashpaw moved confidently, having already mastered the basic battle move, but Hailpaw still looked hesitant. I hopped that once the adrenaline kicked in he would become more enthusiastic.

The battle move called for Ashpaw to lunge towards Hailpaw, and Hailpaw to duck, so that her paws were splayed on either side of him, thus rendering her unsteady. Once that step was completed Hailpaw could bolt up and knock her off her paws.

Suddenly Ashpaw made her move and leapt towards Hailpaw. However, instead of following the move, Hailpaw sidestepped out of the boundaries. Ashpaw drew back, confused. "What are you doing? You were supposed to duck!"

Hailpaw looked at his paws, embarrassed. "Sorry," he mumbled. "I forgot what to do and I panicked."

From her place beside me, Dawnpelt narrowed her eyes suspiciously and murmured, "That's unlikely. Hailpaw's very good at keeping a cool head; he never panics."

"It's his first time performing the move," Tawnypelt argued. "His nerves are perfectly understandable."

Frankly, I found myself agreeing with Dawnpelt. Although I certainly wasn't close to my apprentice I spent enough time with him to know that very little phased him. Even so I chose to give Hailpaw the benefit of the doubt and called, "Just step back in the circle and try again, Hailpaw."

Five more attempts later and I was close to losing my mind. For whatever reason, Hailpaw refused to perform the move correctly! He sidestepped, he dodged, he circled for too long. A glance to my right told me that Dawnpelt and Tawnypelt felt the same frustration I did.

On his sixth failed attempt I finally growled, "That's it - you're done for the day, Hailpaw. I'm tired of watching you purposely mess up this move!"

"I'm not doing it on purpose!" Hailpaw protested. "I'm just nervous!"

I snorted. "Yeah right. Come on, we're going back to camp. Maybe tomorrow you'll quite being such a lizard-brain and actually put some effort into the move!" Hailpaw didn't really react, but I could tell my harsh tone struck a chord with him. Ashpaw regarded her friend helplessly.

"You're done too, Honeypaw," Ivytail growled. "A lopsided badger moves with more grace than you do!"

Honeypaw flinched. "No, wait, let me try it one more time. I can do it this time!"

Ivytail scoffed. "Please - hedgehogs will fly before you manage to perform the move correctly."

Honeypaw lowered her head in shame. Had I not felt the exact same way about Hailpaw, I might have felt a pang of sympathy for her.

Even as we trotted back to camp Ivytail continued to rant angrily. "Honeypaw and Hailpaw, I don't understand either of you. It's the most basic move there is, and yet, I've never seen an apprentice struggle so hard!"

"You both fight like your mother," I growled bitterly.

Ivytail stopped walking entirely as horror settled on her features, and then she groaned loudly. " _That's_ who she reminded me of - Pinenose! Oh StarClan, we don't need another one of those!"

"Another _two_ of those, you mean," I mumbled, and glared pointedly at Hailpaw.

Cloverpaw, who was trotting alongside Owlclaw (she knew better than to bother me while I was in such a mood), looked curiously at Ivytail and myself. "What's wrong with Pinenose?" she demanded.

 _What **isn't** wrong with Pinenose?_ Rotten, Dark Forest traitor scum.

Tawnypelt rushed to answer the young she-cat, so that neither Ivytail or I had the chance to upset her. "As an apprentice, Pinenose was… um… not a very skilled fighter."

I scoffed. "That's an understatement!"

Ivytail nodded. "Pinenose was the worst fighter ShadowClan has ever seen! She had a horrible time remembering her moves, she was sloppy, slow, and her blows barely stung." The sharp-tongued tortoiseshell she-cat glared at Hailpaw and his sister. "I hoped we would never have to deal with such an untalented apprentice ever again, but it seems like Pinenose passed all her abilities down to you two."

Owlclaw raised an eyebrow. "Surely she wasn't that horrible?"

I shook my head. "As someone who trained alongside her, I can confirm that Pinenose _was_ that horrible."

Ivytail glanced at Cloverpaw and sniffed. "Your father, on the other paw, was a very good fighter, and it seems like you received all of his ability."

Cloverpaw looked torn between defending her mother's honor and bragging about how well she had done. The praise only seemed to shame Hailpaw and Honeypaw even further.

 _Maybe you should try and encourage Hailpaw to try harder tomorrow?_ My conscious suggested.

 _No._ I replied, dryly.

 **Dawn Frost**

Pinenose met us at the camp entrance, a fond smile worn upon her lips as she gazed at her kits. "How did your first day of battle training go?" she asked.

"Horrible," Hailpaw growled.

"Terrible," Honeypaw murmured.

"It was great!" Cloverpaw exclaimed, as she bounced past her mother. "Ivytail said that I fight just like Ratscar!"

Pinenose blinked, taken back by her kits responses, and looked towards their mentors for answers. "What about Hailpaw and Honeypaw?"

I glared at Pinenose and said, "They fight exactly like you."

Pinenose's eyes widened, before she clenched them shut and groaned loudly. "StarClan bless their hearts."

"And bless their mentors hearts too, while you're at it," Ivytail added dryly.

 **Dawn Frost**

As it turned out, StarClan decided to not bless their apprentices' hearts OR their mentors' hearts, which was really quite a shame, seeing as both parties could have benefited from it.

But _noooooo_ , StarClan were determined to keep all their blessings to themselves!

"Hailpaw," I growled between gritted teeth. "I swear to StarClan, if you sidestep _one more time-_!"

"Honeypaw!" Ivytail barked. "Is that the best you can do? You're supposed to unbalance Cloverpaw, not nuzzle her stomach!"

"I wouldn't believe how terrible they were if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes," Smokefoot breathed. "But you're right - they fight exactly like Pinenose!"

"I told you so," I growled. "It's depressing to watch."

As a matter of fact, it was such a depressing sight that Tawnypelt decided to skip that day's training session, instead choosing to trust us with Ashpaw's wellbeing. Over the past couple of days I'd complained to Smokefoot and Scorchfur about how horrible Hailpaw and Honeypaw looked, and finally Smokefoot demanded to come along. 'No one will ever be as terrible as Pinenose,' he declared firmly, right before we exited the camp.

He'd certainly changed his mind now.

 **Dawn Frost**

Two days after Smokefoot's shadowing and the apprentices were still a mess. Only Cloverpaw had managed to master the simple battle move - unlike her siblings she actually had a gift for battle moves - and she'd lost interest in training a few days ago. She was roaring to move on and learn new tactics, and Owlclaw was contemplating training her alone, so that her siblings weren't holding her back.

 _Speaking of holding someone back…_ I thought, as I glanced at Hailpaw. He was trotting a few paces behind the pack, frustration evident in his dark blue eyes, whilst Ashpaw whispered encouraging words into his ear. She looked almost as frustrated as he did.

A theory had popped into my head the other day while I watched Hailpaw try and fail to execute the move; I wondered if perhaps _he_ was holding _himself_ back, because he didn't want to hurt Ashpaw. It was clear to everyone that Hailpaw had feelings for the pretty apprentice, so it wasn't an outrageous notion.

Of course there was no way in StarClan that _anyone_ could fake failure so spectacular, which led me to believe that while Hailpaw harbored no special talent for fighting like Cloverpaw did, he wasn't _improving_ because he wasn't _trying_ to.

On the other paw, it was entirely possible that Hailpaw really was _that_ miserable of a fighter. He was, after all, the son of Pinenose. And if that really was the case than I was going to propose to Rowanstar that Pinenose should be banned from having any more litters. If her kits were going to be the future of ShadowClan than we would never win any battles.

As we approached the camp I noticed Pinenose waiting outside the entrance, as had become her routine. She was stubbornly clinging onto the hope that Hailpaw and Honeypaw hadn't inherited her fighting abilities.

"Hey guys," she greeted us with a brave smile. "How was-"

I interrupted her before she could finish her question. "Cloverpaw continues to excel, while Hailpaw and Honeypaw continue to mimic clumsy badgers and, well, _you._ "

Honeypaw's head lowered in shame. "I don't mimic them on purpose," she muttered, sadly.

"I don't understand why you even bother to ask how they're doing," Ivytail said dryly. "At this rate, I'll be amazed if Honeypaw manages to master the move before their warrior assessment."

That seemed to be the young she-cat's breaking point. Honeypaw's eyes shined with unshed tears and she shoved past her mentor and darted into the camp. Dawnpelt was quick to leave my side and follow her. Ivytail sighed gravely once she'd left. "If she coddles her than Honeypaw will never find the will to improve."

Frankly I was surprised that Dawnpelt had followed her. She was a firm believer in not coddling others, and motivating them with stern/encouraging words. But then I remembered that she was close to all of the kits, not just Hailpaw.

Meanwhile, I watched as a spark flared in Pinenose's eyes, and her posture became more defensive. "Cloverpaw, Hailpaw, Ashpaw," she growled softly. "Go take care of the elders."

Ashpaw obeyed without a moment's hesitation, but Hailpaw and Cloverpaw didn't share her enthusiasm. "Why?" Cloverpaw demanded. "What are you going to do?"

" **Now**!" Pinenose snarled. The siblings' eyes widened and a moment later, they followed Ashpaw into camp. Once they'd disappeared, Pinenose spun around to glare at Ivytail and myself. "Why are you two so determined to humiliate my kits?" she demanded.

I scoffed. " _We_ don't have to do anything - they humiliate themselves!"

"Well you certainly aren't doing anything to help them!" Pinenose retorted.

Owlclaw, who was usually a peacemaker, spoke up. "That's not true, Pinenose. We're doing everything we can for them, they just lack the basic instinct and ability." His tone was kind and respectful, but Pinenose whirled around on him like he was an enemy warrior.

"Don't get involved in this, Owlclaw," she snarled. "This is between Crowfrost and Ivytail!"

"Hey," I barked. "Owlclaw has been present at every training session, he's seen what goes on! He has a very credible opinion!"

And then Pinenose directed all of her fury towards me. I would admit, even if I didn't waver outwardly, inwardly I was full of dread. Everyone knew not to get between a mother and her babies, whether it be a fox or a kittypet. But a fully-trained, dangerous warrior? Well. That was just begging StarClan to end your life, even if said warrior was the worst fighter in the whole forest.

"And _you_ ," Pinenose hissed. "I still don't understand why Rowanstar gave you Hailpaw to mentor! You're grudge against the Dark Forest is so obvious that even a mouse wouldn't be oblivious to it! Why, I wouldn't be surprised if you were purposely trying to ruin Hailpaw's training!"

My jaw dropped. "Are you serious, Pinenose?" I exclaimed. "I may not like Hailpaw or you and Ratscar, but I would _never_ go out of my way to ruin an apprentices' education. My reputation as a mentor is on the line, here!"

"And we all know that's all that matters to you, isn't it?" Pinenose growled. "Your _precious_ reputation."

I narrowed my frosty-blue eyes and opened my jaws, a stinging retort on the tip of my tongue, when Ivytail pushed in front of me and got in Pinenose's face. Oh no.

" _Ivytail_ ," I said warningly. I may not like Pinenose, and I may have been ready to stand there and argue with her for the rest of the day, but there was no reason to unsheathe claws or spill blood.

And judging by the way Ivytail's fur bristled, and the furious gleam in Pinenose's eyes, blood was going to be spilled.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

I hesitated once I reached the Apprentice Den, and hovered outside the entrance. I cared deeply about Honeypaw and her siblings, but I didn't want to barge in on the golden tabby she-cat while she was crying and further embarrass her. But Honeypaw had always been more sensitive than Hailpaw or Cloverpaw.

After hesitating a second longer I strolled quietly into the den and took a seat beside the tearful apprentice. I laid my tail across her back, admittedly a bit tense (comforting others was not my forte), but if Honeypaw sensed the awkwardness she didn't comment on it. "Why does Ivytail hate me so much?" the young she-cat asked, her head rested on her paws, her light blue gazed trained on the floor. She was the picture of sadness.

My heart broke a little bit in my chest. "Ivytail doesn't hate you, Honeypaw," I whispered. "She's your mentor."

"That doesn't mean anything," Honeypaw whispered. "Crowfrost is Hailpaw's mentor, and Crowfrost still hates him." I immediately opened my jaws to protest, even if it was true, but Honeypaw beat me to it. "It's okay Dawnpelt, you don't have to deny it. We all know it."

I closed my jaws and stared at the apprentice, feeling helpless.

The golden tabby she-cat sighed quietly. "I really do try my hardest when we're training," she whispered, and her voice trembled as she went on. "I really, _really_ do! But it's just so hard. I always forget the routine, and even when I do remember it I'm really clumsy, so I mess up anyways."

I started stroking her spine with my tail. "Fighting doesn't come naturally to everyone," I told her. "Obviously it didn't come naturally to your mother, and you've seen how Hailpaw struggles too. Some cats are just better adapt for it."

Honeypaw clenched her eyes tightly shut, and I guessed it was to keep her tears from falling. "But Hailpaw's a good hunter. He even caught a piece of prey on his first try! The only prey I've ever caught was an old toad. So I'm a lousy hunter _and_ a terrible fighter!" She buried her head in her paws. "I'm never going to be good enough to become a warrior, and Ivytail will hate me forever."

"You can't give up hope that easily," I said stubbornly. "If you do then you'll never become anything at all!"

Honeypaw raised her watery-blue eyes and gazed sadly at me. "Did hunting and fighting come naturally to you?" she softly inquired.

I wished I could have said no, and then told her a rousing story about how I overcame the odds and worked until I became such a skilled warrior, but that would be lying. In all honestly I didn't struggle with much as an apprentice. _Unless I want to tell her the story about…_

Honeypaw took my silence as confirmation and sighed again. "I didn't think so. There's never been an apprentice as lousy as me."

I went to protest again, because if I didn't then no one would, when a sudden ear-splitting screech echoed throughout the camp. My eyes widened and Honeypaw leapt to her paws. "That's Pinenose!" she exclaimed.

We bolted out of the Apprentice Den just in time to see Hailpaw and Cloverpaw race past us, paws drumming on the cold ground and tails streaming out behind them. Honeypaw and I, along with half of the camp, followed them, but Ratscar shot past everyone as he ran towards his mate. "Pinenose!" he cried, as he darted out of the camp.

Hailpaw and Cloverpaw skidded to a halt right behind him, and I heard Cloverpaw gasp. _Great StarClan, who could be attacking her?! Have ThunderClan staged an ambush?_

But when I stopped beside the apprentices I felt shock crash over me like a wave. It wasn't ThunderClan - it wasn't any of the other clans - it was _Ivytail and Owlclaw_! The two warriors had Pinenose pinned down and appeared to be winning the fight, but Ratscar didn't hesitate before letting out a furious hiss and throwing himself into the scuffle to defend his mate.

Just then I noticed Crowfrost in the middle of it all. For a heartbeat I thought he'd started the whole fight, and then I realized that he wasn't fighting Pinenose; he was trying to get between her and her opponents. _Crowfrost is… trying to break up a fight?_ Shock crashed over me a second time _. It's like he and Owlclaw have switched personalities!_

As soon as Ratscar jumped into the fight Crowfrost was pushed aside, a look of complete bewilderment masked his expression. "Wha-, **Ratscar!** " he barked. "What are you doing?! You're not helping anyone by getting involved!"

"Yes he is! He's helping Pinenose!" a voice exclaimed. I couldn't place it right then but apparently Crowfrost could, because he shot the speaker a cold glare.

"Crowfrost, do something!" Stoatfur called.

Crowfrost, who was once again trying to get between the yowling and spitting warriors, shot Stoatfur a glare as well. "I'm _trying_!" he called back.

"Well… try harder!" Was Stoatfur's intelligent response.

Ferretclaw whirled around to glare at the she-cat. "Don't you dare order Crowfrost around!" he snarled. "Crowfrost is the best, most intelligent, most brave deputy in all of the clans!"

"It's not very hard to be the best when there's only four deputies," I heard Tigerheart mutter to Waspstripe.

Crowfrost was shoved out of the fight again, and the look he shot Ferretclaw was even harsher than the one he gave the un-named speaker and Stoatfur combined. "Shut-up, Ferretclaw! Quit trying to help me!"

"What's that?" Ferretclaw called back. "You said to tackle Stoatfur and make her wish she'd never been kitted? Okay!" My jaw dropped when Ferretclaw spun around again and tackled Stoatfur without a second's hesitation. How did he get that from _'Quit trying to help me'?!_

But at that moment Ferretclaw's mindset didn't matter, because all of a sudden fights broke out everywhere. Grassheart turned on Spikefur, and Waspstripe rushed forward to aid Grassheart. Olivenose and Starlingwing tried to pry Stoatfur off of their brother, but somehow Starlingwing ended up fighting against Tawnypelt. Ashpaw went to help her mentor but was knocked into Applefur, who was pitted against Scorchfur.

"Hey!" Crowfrost shouted, when he was shoved out of his own fight once more and noticed Applefur and Scorchfur's fight. "Get your filthy, Dark Forest traitor paws off my best friend!"

I could only watch in horror as my clanmates hissed and spat, yowled and caterwauled at each other. Specks of red began to settle on their pelts and I almost threw up when I realized that the red was blood. _Great StarClan, my clanmates are spilling each other's' blood!_

Just then Smokefoot skidded to a stop right beside me, chest heaving, and his eyes narrowed playfully as he sought out Crowfrost. "Crowfrost, you lizard-brain, what have you done?" I stared at Smokefoot incredulously; he found this _amusing_?!

Before Crowfrost could defend himself Ferretclaw untangled himself from Stoatfur and lunged at the smokey-gray tom. "How dare you accuse Crowfrostyfox of starting a fight!"

Crowfrost's head shot up. " _Ferretclaw,_ get your paws off my other best friend, you piece of fox-dung! Your paws are even dirtier than Applefur's! If you want to fight someone for me so badly then go find Kinkfur!" As an afterthought, he added, " _And quit giving me nicknames_!"

Suddenly a flash of dark brown shot past me, and I could only watch as Tigerheart tackled Crowfrost to the ground.

" _No_!" I cried, and started shoving past cats to get to my brother and Crowfrost. Even if Crowfrost and I were still trying to work out the kinks in our friendship, I knew exactly why Tigerheart had gone after Crowfrost, and if I didn't stop them then one of them was going to end up seriously injured.

I got knocked into several hissing warriors but pressed forward stubbornly until I reached the snarling, spitting toms. Somehow Crowfrost had managed to flip their positions and was on top of Tigerheart, although Tigerheart was clawing his stomach to shreds.

"Tigerheart, quit! Get off of him, Crowfrost!" But neither tom paid me any attention as they continued swiping and clawing. With a growl I steeled my nerves and lunged forward, wiggling between them and hating myself for doing so as I was caught in the crossfire.

I don't know how long the war raged on, but after what seemed like an eternity, a bold yowl echoed throughout the forest, immediately capturing everyone's attention. I looked towards the Tall Boulder and gasped when I saw Rowanstar, towering tall and strong _and furious_ among his clanmates.

"Have you all gone mad?!" he boomed. "What's going on?!"

Several cats started to answer him, all yelling and jostling for his attention, until Rowanstar yowled again and called them down. Then Ratscar growled, "I'll tell you what happened, Rowanstar; Crowfrost started a fight with Pinenose, and Ivytail and Owlclaw backed him up! They ganged up on my mate!"

My brow furrowed. _But-... no, that's not true!_ "Crowfrost was trying to break up the fight, not start one!" I hissed.

Ratscar shot me a cold look. "Then who do you think started it?" he demanded. "Peace-loving Owlclaw, or Respectable Ivytail?"

With a growl Crowfrost shoved Tigerheart off of him, and stormed over to Ratscar until they were face to face. "I was trying to _help_ your mate, you piece of fox-dung!" he spat.

"Liar!" Ratscar retorted. "Everyone knows you've been itching to get your paws on a Dark Forest trainee, and you finally found your chance!"

"Why _you_ -!"

The area filled with furious shouts, as the clan took sides in the argument.

"It's true!" Spikefur yelled. "Crowfrost has never liked Dark Forest trainees!"

"Like you would know anything about the Dark Forest," Scorchfur growled. "You were kitted after the war!"

Tigerheart growled from his place beside me. "So what? Even a mouse could sense his obvious dislike towards the trainees!" I winced when I noticed a large gash above Tigerheart's eye. Actually, now that I looked at him, I noticed gashes and cuts everywhere. _Crowfrost really didn't hold back… is that because Tigerheart wasn't holding back either, or is it because Tigerheart trained in the Dark Forest?_ A forest fire started to burn in the pit of my stomach. New friendship or not, no one hurt my brother.

The clan continued to argue amongst themselves for a few moments longer until Rowanstar called them down again. "Enough!" he yowled. Once the clan calmed down again, more or less, Rowanstar turned his gaze to Crowfrost. "Did you start the fight?" he asked gruffly.

Crowfrost, who'd finally back away from Ratscar, stared Rowanstar in the eye. "No," he growled lowly.

"It was my fault, Rowanstar," Ivytail suddenly stepped forward. Her twitching whiskers indicated that she was embarrassed, but she held her head high. "Pinenose and I were arguing, and it got a bit heated, and I just…" she trailed off as she shook her head, as if mortified by her own actions. "I was agitated, and I took my anger out on Pinenose. I certainly didn't mean for it to escalate to _this_ ," she finished, and gestured to her gathered clanmates with her tail.

Rowanstar narrowed his eyes. "I see. Ratscar mentioned Owlclaw too; how did he play into this?"

Owlclaw dipped his head, clearly ashamed with himself. "When Ivytail turned on Pinenose I acted out of reflex; I saw my clanmate fighting someone, and I couldn't let her do it alone."

"So then Pinenose isn't your clanmate too?" Ratscar demanded.

"Would you _shut-up_ already?" Smokefoot growled, before he broke into a bout of coughing. Crowfrost, who'd continue to hold Rowanstar's gaze, blinked as the sound lifted him from his trance, and then silently padded over to his friend and pressed his pelt against his, in a show of comfort.

Slowly, the fire in my stomach started to dim. _Smokefoot is like his brother,_ I realized. _They're like me and Tigerheart._ The thought compelled me to lean against Tigerheart as well. Tigerheart licked the top of my head in response.

"So then Crowfrost didn't provoke the fight?" Rowanstar asked.

Ivytail shook her head as Owlclaw answered, "No, he didn't. When the fight started Crowfrost tried to get between us, and that's when Ratscar joined in."

Rowanstar lowered his gaze so that it rest on Ratscar, clearly unimpressed. "I see," he muttered.

Ratscar's fur bristled along his spine. "Okay, so Crowfrost didn't start the fight; good for him. But this has escalated into something more. How are we, as a clan, supposed to function under a deputy who is obviously prejudice?"

"The same way we've been doing it for the past two moons," Olivenose snapped. Fondness for my best friend flickered briefly in my chest - trust Olivenose to stand up for her idol - when I remembered that I was still angry with her.

"You mean with selective patrols and open favoritism?" Pinenose asked, dryly.

Crowfrost shot the two Dark Forest trainees a glare. "You're both still _alive,_ aren't you? I'd say I'm doing a pretty outstanding job!"

"Crowfrost," Rowanstar warned his deputy. "Stand down."

I half-expected Crowfrost to jump to his paws that instant, just to defy my father, but to my amazement and slight relief he simply dipped his head.

Rowanstar scanned his clanmates from atop his perch on the Tall Boulder. "Are Ratscar and Pinenose the only two who feel like Crowfrost is too prejudice to continue to serve as their deputy?"

At this point I wasn't surprised when several voices chimed in and arguments broke out.

"We need someone who we can trust our lives with!" Stoatfur exclaimed.

Starlingwing glared at the she-cat. "Has everyone forgotten that I trained in the Dark Forest as well, and Crowfrost treats me like a friend?"

"Like I said," Pinenose sniffed. "Open favoritism."

Rowanstar raised his tail for silence. "Then I have an idea," the ginger tabby tom started. "Since so many of you seem to think that Crowfrost is no longer capable of serving as deputy, I'm going to let ShadowClan decide what to do with him."

Shocked gasps were exhaled into the cold, crisp air. A few warriors whispered furiously to each other. I was practically beside myself with dread and curiosity. _What does he mean by that?_

Crowfrost blinked and regarded his clan leader with a weary expression. "Rowanstar-?" he started, unsure.

My father pretended to not hear him as he continued speaking. "Those who believe that Crowfrost is fit to continue on as deputy will go to one side of camp - where my den is. Those who believe a new deputy should be selected will go to the other side of the camp - where the warriors and elders sleep. If the majority of the clan vote to keep Crowfrost as their deputy, then so be it."

"What if the majority oppose Crowfrost?" Applefur asked, curiously. I noticed Crowfrost shoot her a dirty look.

Rowanstar shrugged. "Then we, as a clan, will vote on a new deputy. The same situation applies if there happens to be a tie."

"Will everyone vote?" Tawnypelt inquired, and gestured towards Ashpaw. "Even the apprentices?"

The ShadowClan leader nodded. "Of course. They're apart of ShadowClan too, aren't they?" From where they sat in front of their parents, Cloverpaw and Honeypaw exchanged delighted glances. Hailpaw simply smirked.

"We'll go by order of seniority," Rowanstar meowed. "That means the elders will vote first."

"We're here, Rowanstar," Shrewfoot spoke up, somewhere in the back of the pack.

"Good," Rowanstar replied, and I frowned when I noticed his eyes gleamed with unspoken excitement. "Then let's get started."

 **Dawn Frost**

The amount of tension within the camp was suffocating. Cats were holding their breaths in anticipation, whilst others couldn't stop shifting, filled to the brim with nervous energy. A few of the younger cats chattered excitedly amongst each other, thrilled to be apart of making such an important decision.

We were all gathered in the very center of the camp, so it was a bit of a tight squeeze. I'd stuck close to Tigerheart, and ended up between him and my mother. Rowanstar stood beside Tawnypelt, and Crowfrost was spread lazily on top of the Tall Boulder. Since he wasn't allowed to vote, Rowanstar had granted him permission to do so.

"He sure doesn't seem very concerned," Tigerheart muttered, bitterly.

I shrugged. "That's just Crowfrost for you. Nothing ever seems to phase him."

"Cocky mouse-brain," Tigerheart retorted. I had to agree with him. If I were in Crowfrost's position I would have been a wreck. But then again, Crowfrost was very popular within the clan, and he knew it too. So what if a couple of cats weren't pleased with his attitude? A few opinions didn't matter.

 _Then again, wars have been started over less than a few opinions,_ I thought gravely.

"Can we go ahead and get this over with?" Crowfrost drawled. "This boulder isn't as comfortable as it looks."

Rowanstar ignored his deputy. Instead he looked towards the elders and said, "Oakfur, you're the eldest cat in the clan. You're up first."

Oakfur nodded and stood shakily to his paws, and I realized with dread that this would probably be the old tom's last leaf-bare. He padded towards the side of camp with the Warriors and the Elders dens; the side that opposed Crowfrost. I glanced at Crowfrost to watch him react, and he didn't appear to care.

Kinkfur went after Oakfur, and choose the same side. Shocked whispered floated around the group of gathered cats, and my brow furrowed. Kinkfur was Crowfrost's mother. Surely if one cat was on his side, it would be the one who birthed him? I knew without a doubt that Tawnypelt would fight tooth and claw for me, no matter what. But then again, very rarely did I ever see Crowfrost visit his mother; maybe never at all. _Perhaps they're not close? Not all families are._

I glanced at Crowfrost again, but other than narrowing his eyes, his carefree expression had yet to shift.

Shrewfoot sided with her denmates as well. "You're an excellent warrior, Crowfrost," she started. "And you're fiercely loyal to ShadowClan. But a deputy mustn't let his personal grudges get in the way of how he performs his duties." The black-and-white tom smiled briefly at the kind elder, and I was impressed when he didn't react childishly to her advice.

Smokefoot looked at Rowanstar. "Am I up next?"

He shook his head. "We're going by seniority of age, not rank; Littlecloud is next."

Littlecloud didn't move for a few heartbeats, his expression contorted into one of thought. Finally he stood to his paws and joined the elders.

"Littlecloud!" Crowfrost exclaimed in mock-hurt. "How could you?"

A tiny smile pulled at the medicine cat's lips. "It's like Shrewfoot said, Crowfrost. You're a brilliant warrior, but you let your opinions waver your actions too much to be in a position of authority."

Crowfrost sighed loudly, mostly for show, but I couldn't help but wonder if his question had any authenticity behind it; " _how could you?"_

Ivytail went next, and became the first to vote to keep Crowfrost as deputy. He winked at her and she rolled her eyes at him, and I wondered if her views were bias as well. Ivytail had always been very opinionated, and at one point, she had a thing with Crowfrost.

I couldn't help but wrinkle my nose at the thought. Ivytail was older than my father, and Crowfrost, who became a warrior only a moon or two before I became an apprentice, had a fling with her. _He certainly isn't picky._

Rowanstar went next and stood beside Ivytail. Crowfrost was thrilled. "If a clan leader's word is law-" he started, but a look from Rowanstar silenced him.

Tawnypelt followed Rowanstar. Ratscar and Pinenose joined Littlecloud and the elders.

Applefur was next. I thought she would oppose Crowfrost, seeing as she'd trained in the Dark Forest and Crowfrost always held a particular grudge against her, but to everyone's amazement she voted to keep Crowfrost in. No one said anything, but the question was on everyone's minds.

Smokefoot, Scorchfur, and Snowbird followed Applefur, although that was hardly amazing.

I didn't hit me until Snowbird voted that my time was nearing. After Owlclaw and Tigerheart voted, I would be next. _What am I going to do?_ A moon ago the decision would have been an easy one. I wouldn't have even blinked before voting for a new deputy. But now… almost an entire moon had passed since Crowfrost saved me from drowning, and it felt like things had changed so much. Now we were training Hailpaw together, and although the partnership had started off horribly, it'd improved drastically since we started testing a friendship.

 _Friendship…_ We had one of those. The two cats who openly despised each other since they'd known each other, were on their way to becoming friends. Maybe not best friends, but still. And weren't you supposed to stand beside your friends, no matter what?

But then again, I really wasn't sure what I thought of Crowfrost anymore. He abused his power and displayed outrageous amounts of prejudice and favoritism, but on the other hand… he really was a brilliant warrior. The kind of warrior you could only dream of having as an allie. He was strong, bold, fearless. He never let anyone walk over him, but at the same time, could be incredibly charismatic (sometimes a bit too much so). I used to scoff when cats called him 'loyal' because of his treatment to those who trained in the Dark Forest, but when I stopped and thought about it… he was only so hostile towards them because they'd betrayed their clan first. Maybe they didn't know it at the time, but ultimately, they played a role in the war.

Tigerheart stood up from beside me and padded boldly towards those who opposed Crowfrost. _Oh StarClan, it's my turn. What am I supposed to do?!_

No one seemed to be awaiting my decision with baited breath; of course I would vote for a new deputy. Why wouldn't I?

I risked a glance at Crowfrost, and my heart nearly stopped beating when I saw that his frosty-blue gaze was trained solely on me. Gone was his relaxed aura. Now he stared at me with an intensity that made the hairs on my pelt prickle.

 _What are you going to do?_ The question gleamed in his eyes.

I inhaled a breath, and then stood to my paws. I refused to look anyone in the eye as I padded towards Crowfrost's supports, even when a collective gasp went up. I simply took a seat beside Applefur and then busied myself with grooming my pelt, and pretended I couldn't feel my clanmates stares.

Olivenose joined me a second later. "You didn't side against Crowfrost?" she breathed in my ear, shocked. I continued to give her the silent treatment, and after a few moments she leaned forward and placed a lick on my ear. "Thank you," she whispered.

I concealed my scoff. _I didn't do it for you._

Starlingwing sat beside his sister, and then Ferretclaw joined his siblings as well. No one was surprised in the slightest when Ferretclaw started to make a show of voting for Crowfrost, complete with dramatic dialog and lots of gestures. Crowfrost only rolled his eyes.

I finally risked glancing up from my pelt, and when I did I found myself looking straight into the eyes of Tigerheart. His amber eyes were narrowed with confusion and a demand for answers, and I sat taller, more defiant. I didn't owe anyone an explanation, not even Stripes.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Crowfrost was watching our exchange, and when it ended he smirked. _Oh, wipe that smug look off your face, arrogant lizard-brain._

Stoatfur, Grassheart, and Spikefur all sided against Crowfrost. Stoatfur and Spikefur weren't that surprising, neither of them were huge Crowfrost fans (although I'd caught Stoatfur stare longingly at Crowfrost too many times to count), but Grassheart - why in the name of StarClan would _she_ vote against him? In terms of rank, she was one of Crowfrost's biggest fans; only behind Ferretclaw and Olivenose!

Finally Waspstripe, the youngest warrior, joined our side. That just left the apprentices.

I hurriedly counted the cats on our side and then the cats who opposed Crowfrost. Thirteen who were for him. Ten who opposed him. Four apprentices to go, and if three of them opposed Crowfrost, then it would be a tie. If all four opposed him, then we would be voting on a new deputy next.

I glanced at Crowfrost again, but somehow he still maintained his casual, relaxed posture. Wasn't he even the least bit concerned that he was going to lose his title? Being deputy meant everything to him!

Cloverpaw didn't hesitate before bounding over to our side of the camp. I was surprised by her certainty - after all, according to Honeypaw all the siblings knew how Crowfrost felt about them - before I remembered this was _Cloverpaw._ She was a very confident she-cat, and stuck strong to her morels. Even if she was the only one who was for Crowfrost, she would still vote for him.

And then there were three.

Hailpaw sat tall, his face masked with an unreadable expression. Honeypaw's light blue eyes were trained on her paws, and in between them both sat Ashpaw, whose features were thoughtful. For what seemed like hours none of them moved a muscle, and I found myself holding my breath in anticipation. It was finally Hailpaw who stood to his paws first, and he choose to vote against Crowfrost.

I wished I could have said his decision surprised me, but it didn't. And judging by Crowfrost's expression, Hailpaw's decision surprised him about as much as Kinkfur's.

 _Just Ashpaw and Honeypaw left…_ A few seconds later Honeypaw stood up and followed Hailpaw.

And now, Crowfrost's fate rest on Ashpaw's shoulders. If she voted against him then the sides would be tied, and if she voted for him, he would continue on as deputy. I was selfishly relieved that I wasn't in her position. It was easier to choose sides when you didn't carry the deciding vote.

When Ashpaw stood up I heard a collective gasp breathed into the crisp air, and then there were cheers when she choose to vote for Crowfrost. I couldn't help but laugh as relief flooded through my body; I didn't realize how strongly I wanted Crowfrost to remain deputy until he almost wasn't anymore. At that moment in time, I couldn't think of another warrior who could do as well as him.

"ShadowClan has spoken," Rowanstar boomed. "Crowfrost will remain deputy!" More victorious yowls punctuated his declaration.

I grinned and turned to congratulate Crowfrost, but the grin faded from my lips when I noticed he wasn't on the Tall Boulder anymore. I looked around and blinked in surprise when I caught sight of him heading towards the camp exit.

"Where does he think he's going?" Smokefoot demanded. "We just voted to keep him in, and he's leaving!"

"Let him leave," Scorchfur murmured. "He just realized that half of the clan doesn't support him anymore. Give him time to be alone and let it sink in."

I was tempted to chase after Crowfrost, maybe provide a listening ear and let him ramble and complain, but I doubted I could hold my tongue if he said something I disagreed with.

So instead I simply sat and watched as the reigning deputy of ShadowClan disappeared out of sight, and my clanmates continued to cheer.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

I didn't have to wait by the RiverClan border for very long. Somehow I knew she would show up, and judging by the expression on her face when she did, she knew I would too.

"How did I know you would be here?" she asked playfully, proving my theory.

I shrugged and gestured for her to leap across the border and join me. "Maybe I'm becoming predictable?" Hah. As if.

Shimmerpelt purred as she pressed against my side. "The oh-so famous Crowfrost, predictable? What is this world coming to?"

We were silent as we made our way to the outskirts of ShadowClan, the same place I took Shimmerpelt the last time we met up. She must have sensed that something was off with me because she asked, "Is everything alright in ShadowClan? You look like you've just lost a battle."

"Wouldn't you believe it, I actually just won one." At least, that's what they told me.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **What's one event/place/conversation/specific cat you would like to see within the next few chapters?**

 **#You don't have to give me an answer for all four, you can just answer one if you'd like, but I would really love to hear what you guys want to see!**

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 **Guess who's officially on summer vacation! My last day was yesterday, so it seems fitting to start this summer with an update :)**

 **A little bit about this chapter - it totally destroyed the outline in my head. Like... everything past Crowfrost and Dawnpelt's argument wasn't supposed to happen, at least not for a couple more chapters. And actually, it wasn't supposed to be such a bummer chapter either. I actually planned for this one to be hilarious with lots and lots of comic relief, but then it got to the scene with Pinenose and Ivytail, and I just _had_ to let it escalade into a fight - I had to! It's the way the chapter demanded to be written! And then there was the voting (a nod to the presidential election that I'm super proud of myself for slipping in!). But looking back there were some pretty funny lines and scenes; I mean, Ferretclaw started a riot! **

**One more note, I'd like to talk a little bit about Crowfrost's closing line, because I love it so much and I feel like it carries a lot of volume, and I don't want people to overlook it.** ""Is everything alright in ShadowClan? You look like you've just lost a battle." - "Wouldn't you believe it, I actually just won one." At least, that's what they told me." **Crowfrost really did win a 'battle', and when you win battles you're supposed to be victorious and cheer - like his clanmates did. And yet Crowfrost can't bring himself to do that right now. The fact that half of his clan doesn't support him - as Scorchfur pointed out - has finally hit him hard. It hit him so hard that Shimmerpelt thinks something terrible has happened in ShadowClan. Crowfrost then reassures her that everything is fine in ShadowClan - better than fine, he actually just _won_ a battle - but then he goes to think "At least that's what they told me". Because Rowanstar announced that Crowfrost would remain deputy, and his supporters cheered for him, basically shouting: "CROWFROST, YOU WON!" But Crowfrost doesn't feel like he won. He feels like he lost. And the reason why this is so important to me is because that line signifys a turning point in Crowfrost. He's always ignored the truth - that a lot of his clanmates don't like the way he 'rules' ShadowClan - instead preferring to live in his own illusions, where he's adored by all, hated by none. But he was just forced to sit down and watch the truth unfold right in front of him, and now he can't pretend that everyone adores him, because they don't. #RambleOver **

**So... yeah. There ya go. I just really, really wanted to get that off my chest. Dawnpelt's in the process of going through her major turning point - accepting what she did and forgiving herself - and now Crowfrost has started his - acknowledging that not everyone adores him, he isn't perfect, and if he wants to remain deputy he's going to have to face a couple demons of his own.**

 **AND ON THAT JOYFUL NOTE! Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	8. Confessions of a ShadowClan Warrior

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

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 **Chapter Eight - Dawnpelt's Confession / Confessions of a ShadowClan Warrior**

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 **"I don't blame you for being you, but you can't blame me for hating it." - A Little Less Sixteen Candles, A Little More "Touch Me", Fall Out Boy**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

When Crowfrost disappeared that evening and didn't return, most of ShadowClan assumed that when he did return, he would be in a foul, horrible mood.

As per usual when Crowfrost was concerned, we were wrong.

Crowfrost came bounding into camp just as the sun had started to peak past the mountains, not quite later than usual; if I hadn't been standing guard that night, I would have still been asleep. I eyed him wearily when he shot me a typical smirk and flicked my nose with his tail, and then brushed past me into camp. I didn't have much time to ponder his attitude, for his yowl shattered the peace and quiet that had once been.

"WAKE UP, SHADOWCLAN! IT'S TIME FOR PATROLS!"

I flattened my ears against my head and glanced back, in order to glare at the black and white tom. _For StarClan's sake, it's too early for this!_

It seemed that my clanmates agreed with me, if their irritated expressions were anything to go by.

"There's no reason to wake up _everyone_ ," Spikefur hissed. "Some of us could have slept a little longer!"

Ashpaw shivered as she walked alongside Honeypaw. "It's so cold," she whispered.

"I bet this is payback for voting against him yesterday," Tigerheart growled to Pinenose.

A yawn split Olivenose's jaws as she glared at her idol. "What about the ones who _did_ vote for him? Why are _we_ being punished?!"

Crowfrost feigned a look of mock disbelief. "You think I'm _punishing_ you?" he cried, hurt. "I wouldn't dream of doing such a thing! Why, I'm doing this for you guys!"

Ferretclaw was the only cat who was okay with any of this. He bounded towards the clan deputy with a grin, blue eyes wide with excitement and adoration. "That's so thoughtful of you, Crowclawmaw! You're the best deputy the clans have ever seen!"

The smirk Crowfrost had been sporting fell right off his lips, and a dry expression schooled his features. "Oh." he meowed, blandly. " _You_ can go back to sleep."

Ferretclaw simply laughed, as if Crowfrost had told him a joke.

With a roll of his frosty blue eyes, Crowfrost turned his back on the annoying cream and gray warrior and faced the rest of his clanmates. He cleared his throat and then started. "I have been informed by a warrior that wishes to remain anonymous, that some of you believe I have been showing blatant amounts of favoritism."

My eyes widened incredulously. _A warrior that w-... No one tipped him off! We VOTED on it, and we did it right in front of him! Who does he think he's fooling?!_

My question was answered when Ferretclaw gasped in disbelief.

With a roll of my own eyes I abandoned my post and seated myself in between Cloverpaw and Hailpaw. The light gray tabby tom glanced up at me and murmured, "Does he _really_ think anyone's falling for this?"

I shrugged and dryly responded, "I don't think he's doing this to fool anyone; he's doing it to get a reaction. Crowfrost thrives off of attention."

"He's only going to upset cats," Hailpaw mumbled, and Cloverpaw leaned over me to hiss at him.

" _Shush_! Crowfrost is still talking!"

I stifled a groan when Cloverpaw returned her attention to the deputy, green eyes bright with admiration. _Oh StarClan, not Cloverpaw too…_

"-And so," Crowfrost continued. "I've decided to gather you all together, so that I know who exactly I have to place on what patrol, and with whom, to ensure that there's no favoritism shown whatsoever."

I glanced around at my clanmates to see how they were taking this, and I cringed when I saw some of their reactions. A couple of them looked amused, or simply annoyed, but there were others who looked ready to lunge for the deputy's throat. I was fairly sure that Pinenose was talking Ratscar out of doing just that.

"You know, he has a point," I overheard Starlingwing whisper to Applefur. "When he gathers us all together, he knows what he has to work with. It'll make organizing patrols easier."

"But I'm not sure yowling at the top of his lungs was a great way to get cats back on his side," Applefur murmured in response. _Exactly. And Crowfrost knows that._

"Alright, let me see," Crowfrost meowed softly, as he let his gaze rake eagerly over the cats gathered before him. "Hmmm. Pinenose, why don't you lead a hunting patrol near the lake?"

I might have laughed when a collective gasp fell into the crisp, chilly air, except I had gasped as well. No one could remember the last time Crowfrost assigned a Dark Forest trainee to lead a patrol! I chanced a glance at Pinenose, and noticed that she suddenly looked ill.

Crowfrost continued, as if he hadn't just shocked every single one of his clanmates. "And why don't you take Tawnypelt, Ivytail, and Honeypaw with you?"

 _Great StarClan, he's taking this favoritism thing to heart!_ Not only would Pinenose be leading a border patrol, but she would be leading it over two senior warriors as well. Tawnypelt and Ivytail exchanged glances before Ivytail called for her apprentice, and they disappeared through the camp exit.

Crowfrost continued to amaze when he assigned Waspstripe as head of a hunting patrol (the youngest warrior in the clan), and told him to bring Ratscar, Spikefur, and Tigerheart. One of Crowfrost's loyal supports on a patrol full of cats who'd opposed him.

"Dawnpelt," Crowfrost called. "Lead a border patrol towards ThunderClan, and take Olivenose, Applefur, and Grassheart with you." I shot the black and white tom a dirty look ( _he **knows** I'm fighting with Olivenose, I can't stand Grassheart, and ThunderClan hates me!_ ), and he returned it with a trademark smirk.

"Come on," I growled to Grassheart, who was sitting behind me. "Let's go."

 **Dawn Frost**

If this was Crowfrost's way of torturing me, he was definitely on the right track.

"And _then_ ," Grassheart gushed, "Waspstripe brought me a toad that he said he caught especially for me. Isn't that _just desperate_?" the pale brown tabby she-cat finished with a high-pitched laugh.

I flattened my ears against my head. _StarClan, if you're listening, no one will hold it against you if strike her with lightning!_

"I think it's kinda sweet," Applefur said through gritted teeth, green eyes narrowed with annoyance. "Waspstripe's a great tom."

Grassheart shrugged. "Oh, sure, he's nice. But he's no Crowfrost."

I resisted the urge to scream with frustration. Why did Crowfrost always make an appearance in conversations? Why couldn't cats go three seconds without bringing him up?!

Olivenose shot Grassheart a look, and I could tell she wasn't pleased when the other she-cat brought up her long-time crush. "Speaking of Crowfrost," she started smoothly enough. "I noticed you voted for a new deputy yesterday. I would've thought you'd vote for him. What's that about?"

 _Nosey, Crowfrost-obsessed gossip,_ I thought venomously. A small voice in the back of my head whispered that I didn't mean that, and that I missed my best friend. I found my hard expression slipping and slowly, I began to acknowledge that it was right. That is, until it also suggested that I might be curious as well, and then I banished the voice to the back of my head, and hardened my expression once more. _I do **not** care about their stupid gossip, or anything Grassheart has to say in general._

It was much easier to pretend I meant that when I wasn't trying so hard to listen in on their conversation.

"Oh, that little stunt," Grassheart smirked wickedly. "Well, I've created a plan to get Crowfrost to fall for me."

I was impressed when Olivenose didn't immediately lunge for Grassheart's throat. She didn't take kindly to other she-cats attempting to woo her crush. "Oh?" she growled, teeth tightly gritted. "Do tell."

Applefur leaned forward and whispered in my ear, "Do you think we should change the subject?"

I shrugged in an attempt appear nonchalant, and not at all interested in Grassheart's plan. "You can if you want to." Applefur kept her jaws clamped shut, so I assumed that she was also interested in her plan.

Grassheart flicked her tail. "I've noticed that Crowfrost never goes for the she-cats that pad so obviously after him," she started, matter-of-factly. "The most attention he gives them is a night together here and there, or he flirts with them a bit. It's never anything permanent. So, I decided to try a new tactic: play hard to get."

Applefur blinked. "Hard to get?" she echoed.

Grassheart nodded, clearly pleased with herself. "Yep! If Crowfrost thinks I'm not interested in him anymore, he'll become curious - maybe even frustrated - and he'll start paying more attention to me. And the longer I brush him off, the more interested he'll become, until he realizes that he's fallen for me!"

I wanted to scoff, except… Grassheart's plan wasn't a horrible one. As a matter of fact, had she been any other she-cat, it could very well work. She had a few valid points; Crowfrost loved a challenge, he loved the thrill of the chase. The she-cats who made their infatuation obvious to him, well, he shot them a couple of smirk, gave them a few compliments. Before he became the deputy of ShadowClan he would frequently have one-night stands with them. But those who offered him a challenge… those were the ones he lingered around.

It struck me that Ivytail had been one of those challenges. I remembered, as an apprentice, Ivytail would sometimes spend entire days brushing off Crowfrost's flirty words or advances. It wasn't until moons later she finally caved, and then they became mates. That was the happiest I'd ever seen my mentor, and it'd only lasted a few half-moons.

 _He gets bored too easily,_ I thought. _He needs something to keep him busy, and keep his interest peaked. That's why he wakes up so early to go on walks, and why he was so diligent when it came to sorting patrols._ He never stopped moving, he never stopped working. I would go so far as to say he never stopped _thinking._

 _Huh,_ I mused to myself. _Maybe he's more complex than he lets on._

I glanced at Olivenose. I wasn't sure if she was angry because Grassheart had thought of a plan to 'steal' her 'mate' from her, or if she was worried, because Grassheart's plan wasn't a terrible one.

"You don't think Crowfrost will be suspicious when you suddenly stop mooning over him?" I asked dryly. "He's a lizard-brain, but he's an observant lizard-brain. He'll notice the change."

Grassheart shot me a cold look. "Thanks for the concern," she started, her voice full of mockery. "But I've already thought of that. I'll show him I've moved on, and set my sights on a different tom: Waspstripe."

Applefur's bright green gaze sharpened. "You're going to play Waspstripe?" she demanded. "Grassheart!"

"That's pretty low," Olivenose agreed with a growl.

Grassheart rolled her pale green orbs. "Oh, please. Waspstripe is going to love the attention! It's a win-win situation."

"Yeah, until you break his heart," I snarled softly. It wasn't a secret that Waspstripe fancied Grassheart, although only StarClan knew why. Waspstripe was a great tom - respectful, intelligent, brave, caring. He deserved someone much better than selfish, snobby Grassheart.

Grassheart gazed at me with narrowed eyes. "You're one to talk," she spat. "How many toms' hearts have you broken, Dawnpelt?"

"That's different!" I immediately protested, as I felt my skin start to heat up underneath my pelt. "I've never led anyone on!" I didn't enjoy thinking of all the toms I'd refused; the list was long, and I hated to think that many of them only tried to court me because of my status, or my appearance. It was degrading.

"Sure it is," Grassheart scoffed. "Look, if you're so concerned about Waspstripe's broken heart, then why don't _you_ take him as a mate once I've secured Crowfrost?"

"Crowfrost is never going to take you as his mate!" Olivenose snapped, before I had a chance to respond. "He can't stand you!"

I expected Grassheart to protest shrilly or huff and storm away, because that's just the type of she-cat she was, but to my surprise she masked her anger quite well. Instead of making a scene she simply looked Olivenose in the eye and said, "At least I've got a better chance than some fling he doesn't even remember."

The expression that flashed across Olivenose's face proved that she'd had those exact same thoughts.

"Um, guys," Applefur interjected, before things could escalate any further. "We're here…"

I swallowed the stinging retort I'd planned to throw at Grassheart when I realized that Applefur was right; we'd arrived at the ThunderClan border. A quick inspection let us know that ThunderClan hadn't remarked it yet, and I realized with dread that meant we had a chance of running into their patrol. _Not that I'm scared of them_ , I thought to myself. There were a couple of ThunderClanners who I could stand to socialize with - a few that I _liked_ , even - but the majority of ThunderClan and I were not on great terms.

We'd almost finished remarking our border when their patrol finally showed up, and when it did I resisted the urge to groan. It consisted of Berrynose (the arrogant one), Blossomfall (the defensive one), Bumblestripe (the pathetic one), and last but not least, Cherryleaf (the worst one of them all).

 _Of course there couldn't be one cat on their patrol who I'm friends with,_ I thought bitterly. But then again, I would be more surprised if there was one of those cats on the patrol; seriously, there was only a couple of them. I liked Mousewhisker and Hazeltail enough to have conversations with them, and Thornclaw could've passed as a ShadowClan warrior if he tried. Foxleap liked to tell lame jokes, but he was amusing at times.

But the rest of their clan… not so much.

"What are _you_ doing here?" Cherryleaf asked. The way she looked at us, you would think she was staring at crowfood.

Applefur raised an eyebrow. "Um, _remarking our border?_ "

"Or does that go against the Warrior Code?" Olivenose asked, snarkily. "Has Bramblestar created a new law that states 'ShadowClan does not have the right to mark their borders'?"

"Why are ShadowClan always so eager to start a fight?" Blossomfall demanded. "It's like you guys can't help it!"

" _Us_?" Applefur echoed in disbelief. "We were just carrying out orders when _Cherryleaf_ -"

"Okay, that's enough," I said, quick to step in and avoid a fight. After yesterday's events we were all too sore to offer much of a challenge. _Oh, if only Littlecloud had tended to our wounds before we voted!_ "We were just finishing anyways."

Grassheart growled softly from behind me and Applefur shot the ThunderClan patrol a dark look, but they kept their jaws clamped shut. Olivenose glared openly at Cherryleaf but she too remained silent.

"I'm sure you were," Cherryleaf snarked, and if someone had offered me a rat-tail I would have clawed her eyes out of her head right then.

We were just about to turn around and head back to camp when Bumblestripe spoke up. "Be careful on your way back," he meowed, and I narrowed my eyes suspiciously. _Is he threatening me?_ Bumblestripe must have read my expression because a smiled tugged at his lips. "We chased a fox off our territory yesterday, and it looked like it was heading for your territory," he elaborated.

 _Oh._ Embarrassment prickled at my pelt but I tried to play it off with a dip of my head. "Thanks for the warning," I muttered.

"Gee Bumblestripe," Berrynose started dryly. "You're just a sweetheart, aren't you? Warning our enemies."

A growl threatened to arise in my throat, and I had to shove it back down. _They weren't planning on warning us! Those fox-hearts!_

Bumblestripe held his clanmates glare easily as he said, "I try to be. Besides," he shot me another smile. "They would've done the same for us."

I mustered up the most friendly smile I could and nodded, even though we most likely wouldn't have.

"No, we wouldn't have," Grassheart meowed snottily, and the smile slipped off my lips, and I rolled my eyes. _Really? This one time, you couldn't have smiled and flirted with a tom? The **one time** I wouldn't have condoned you for it?_

"Come on, we have to get back to camp and tell Rowanstar and Crowfrost about the fox," I muttered, as I started to turn around and do just that.

"Crowfrost?" Cherryleaf echoed, her voice suddenly full of interest. "How _is_ your deputy doing?"

Olivenose and Grassheart both spun around at the same instinct, and I paused to roll my eyes. _Seriously? Why does Crowfrost always have to come up whenever I'm around?!_

"He's doing fine," Grassheart spat.

"Not that it's any of your business," Olivenose added coldly.

Applefur, who'd paused beside me, murmured, "Great StarClan, it's like every she-cat in the forest loves Crowfrost!"

"Not _every_ she-cat," I mumbled in response. Some of us were still sane.

Cherryleaf seemed to find Grassheart and Olivenose's responses amusing, because she smirked and said, "Well, I'm happy to hear he's doing well. Tell him I said 'hi', will you?"

"No," Olivenose replied dryly and without hesitance.

"Come on Cherryleaf, you've tormented them enough," Berrynose said, as the ThunderClan patrol finished marking their border. The ginger she-cat sent us one last smirk before she returned to her duties, and Olivenose and Grassheart reluctantly joined us once more.

"Can you believe _the nerve_ that she-cat has?" Olivenose exploded as we made our way back to camp.

Grassheart growled. " _As if_ Crowfrost would go for that ThunderClan floosy!"

I shrugged as I picked my way through the marshes. "You never know," I meowed, casually. "Crowfrost isn't very picky when it comes to the she-cats he's had one night stands with. So long as they don't have anything to do with the Dark Forest, he considers them." I shot Applefur a glance. "No offense."

Applefur snorted. "Oh no, my heart's breaking inside of my chest. However will I cope, knowing that Crowfrost won't mate with me?"

I couldn't help but grin at her response and keep walking. _Maybe I'm not the only sane she-cat in ShadowClan after all._

 **Dawn Frost**

We'd just reached camp when Olivenose padded up beside me and whispered, "Can I talk to you?"

I glanced at the tortoiseshell she-cat wearily. On one paw I wanted to say 'no' and continue to ignore her, but on the other paw… I missed my best friend. I missed hunting with her, I missed being able to tell someone all my secrets and fears to. StarClan, I even missed listening to her ramble on about how perfect Crowfrost is!

So I gestured for Applefur and Grassheart to go on without us, and then I turned to face Olivenose. "What?" I asked blandly. Just because I missed her didn't mean I was going to make this easy for her.

Olivenose inhaled a breath and then said, "I'm _so_ sorry for what I said to you when you were… sick. I wasn't there when you needed me, and I've regretted it every day since we had our argument. I just- I wasn't in a good mood that day, and-"

"You weren't in _a good mood_?" I interrupted her. "Are you serious? _That's_ your excuse!"

"You've taken your anger out on me before," Olivenose protested.

I gaped at her. "But I would never say those kinds of things to you while you were _depressed_!"

Olivenose frowned. "Dawnpelt, I've already apologized to you more times than I can count. After we argued I tried everyday to be there for you, and you ignored me. What do I have to do to make it up to you?"

"I-..." I stopped and trailed off, because I didn't have an answer for her. I didn't know what I wanted her to say, or what I wanted her to do. I missed Olivenose and I wanted her by my side again, but she _hurt_ me. When I was exposed and vulnerable, she struck me.

I wanted my best friend back, but I couldn't take her back. Not yet. She needed to say something first, but I didn't know what it was.

I scoffed in an attempt to mask my frustration, and settled my glare on a pinecone beside my paws. "I don't know why you even bothered to apologize," I muttered. I hadn't meant for Olivenose to overhear me, but she did.

The tortoiseshell she-cat swallowed thickly and lowered her bright green gaze so that it rest on her paws. "Because I don't want you to hate me anymore…" she whispered.

My head shot up. "Hate you?" I echoed, before I could stop myself. "Olivenose, I don't hate you!"

The usually sassy she-cat shrugged. "Could've fooled me. You've done nothing but give me the cold shoulder ever since that argument."

"Well, yeah, but…" I shook my head. " _Hate you_? I hate a lot of cats, but I could never hate _you_ , Olivenose."

Olivenose raised her gaze once more, and our eyes met. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

"I forgive you," I responded softly.

And that was that. We shared a small smile, and then padded into camp, side by side, best friends once more.

 **Dawn Frost**

"A fox?" Rowanstar repeated, ears perked. "In _our_ territory?"

I shrugged. "Bumblestripe said it looked like it was heading towards our territory. He never actually saw it cross the border, and we didn't scent anything."

"Even so," the large ginger tom started. "Foxes are a serious threat, especially since it's leaf-bare. It's probably looking for food, and with Snowbird so close to kitting, I don't want to take any chances."

"Take any chances on what?" a dry voice asked, and I glanced back. Crowfrost padded into Rowanstar's den and sat down beside me, and I blinked when I noticed his expression. He looked like he'd just spent the morning with Ferretclaw.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked.

"I just got back from the RiverClan border patrol," Crowfrost responded, blandly. "Ferretclaw was on it."

 _Ah,_ I nodded, and my whiskers twitched with amusement. Crowfrost noticed my response and shot me a dirty look.

"We were talking about a possible fox threat," Rowanstar finally answered his deputy. "Apparently, ThunderClan might have chased one into our territory."

Crowfrost groaned. "Seriously?" he demanded. "Why does it have to be _our territory_?! Why couldn't they have chased it into WindClan's territory?"

Rowanstar scoffed. "They can't control where the fox goes, Crowfrost."

"They could _try_!" Crowfrost argued. "Don't they have a warrior named Foxleap? They should've had him try to negotiate with the fox!"

I rolled my hazel orbs. "Right. Because that's how that works."

"Regardless of whether or not ThunderClan has special fox-controlling abilities - and they _don't_ \- it's up to us to make sure it doesn't come near the camp," Rowanstar meowed. "Crowfrost, I want a guard stationed at all times of the day, not just during the night. And I want another set of guards stationed at the pond, near the training hollow."

Crowfrost sighed heavily and flicked his tail. "Okay, I'll set one up before I take Hailpaw out-"

"Before _we_ take Hailpaw out for training, you mean," I interrupted the black and white warrior.

Crowfrost sent me a dark look. "I just came back from a dawn patrol where all I did was contemplate murder. You might not want to annoy me right me."

"If you hate Ferretclaw so much then why did you patrol with him?" I demanded. "You're the deputy! You're the one who sorts the patrols!"

Crowfrost shot Rowanstar - who was sporting a smirk - a pointed glare. "But even deputies have to listen to their clan leader."

Rowanstar waved his tail to dismiss us. "Alright you two, I'm sure you have more important things to do than argue in my den. Crowfrost, warn the clan and set up the guards before you and Dawnpelt leave."

"Gotcha," Crowfrost replied, as he stood up and padded out of the den.

"That's not an appropriate response when you're talking to your clan leader!" I called after him, but Crowfrost paid me no attention. I huffed and turned to place a swift lick on Rowanstar's cheek, and then followed Crowfrost.

The black and white warrior was already making the announcement when I appeared. I took a seat beside Spikefur and waited patiently for Crowfrost to finish his announcement and set guards.

"Is Rowanstar feeling okay?" Spikefur whispered in my ear.

I furrowed my brow, confused. "Of course he is. Why?"

The dark brown tom shrugged. "Because he sent Crowfrost to make the announcement, instead of doing it himself."

"Oh. Well, don't worry, Rowanstar is perfectly fine. I guess he just sent Crowfrost because it was convenient."

"Ah, I see." Spikefur nodded. I dipped my head as well and tried not to focus on the awkwardness that settled between us. Spikefur was a nice enough tom, a good warrior, but we didn't talk much. "Rowanstar must trust him a lot."

"Hmm?" I glanced the other warrior. "Oh, yeah. I guess he does."

"He gives him a lot of tasks that other clan leaders would usually do themselves," Spikefur went on. "It's interesting."

 _Not really._ "I wasn't aware you knew so much about other clan leaders," I replied. I meant it as a joke, but Spikefur simply stared at me. The awkwardness intensified.

I tore my gaze away from the dark brown warrior when Crowfrost started naming off cats to stand guard, and watch for the fox. "Stoatfur, I want you to stand guard in front of the camp. Starlingwing and Waspstripe, you two will stand guard by the pond. At dusk I want Ratscar to relieve Stoatfur, and Grassheart and Scorchfur will relieve Starlingwing and Waspstripe."

I cringed. _Poor Scorchfur. You'd think Crowfrost would put his best friend with someone a little more tolerable._

"We'll rotate again in the middle of the night, and those cats will stand guard until the dawn patrols are sent out," Crowfrost finished. "I'll pick out those cats before twilight tonight, so that you know ahead of time. Does everyone understand?"

Murmurs went up into the air, and then Honeypaw called out, "What about apprentices? Will we get to stand guard?"

I glanced back at the golden tabby she-cat and frowned lightly. _She wants to prove herself to Ivytail,_ I thought. _But a fox… surely Crowfrost won't agree to put her as a guard?_

I thanked StarClan when Crowfrost shook his head. "No, you're too young. A fox would consider you a snack rather than a threat."

Honeypaw flattened her ears against her head and I sighed, softly. _Poor girl. Maybe… maybe I'll see if she wants to practice with me later today, just the two of us._

"Then this meeting is dismissed," Crowfrost said with a flick of his tail. "If you're on the first rotation then take your positions now."

When the clan dispersed I started to scan the camp for Hailpaw, but was interrupted when Spikefur blocked my line of vision. "Spikefur!" I snapped. "Move!"

But the dark brown tom ignored me. "Maybe Crowfrost will assign us as guards together," he suggested, a hopeful gleam in his eyes. My heart sank when I recognized that gleam. Oh no.

"Um, maybe," I replied, now frantic to escape the tom. "Hey, I'll… talk to you later, but I have to go now. I have to help Crowfrost with Hailpaw."

"Okay."

… I waited for Spikefur to continue, maybe say 'see you later', but he left it at okay. Except… he didn't leave. He stayed right where he was, rooted to the ground and in my way. "Okay then," I mumbled, as I pushed past the strange tom.

I found Hailpaw with Crowfrost. "Where are the others?" I asked, as I approached the duo.

"Already left," Crowfrost replied. "They're on their way to the training hollow. Ashpaw is with them, but Tawnypelt is sitting this one out - again."

I nodded. "Alright. Are we leaving now, or-"

"Actually Dawnpelt," Crowfrost cut me off. "Why don't you go ahead of us and join them? I want to talk to Hailpaw about something."

I blinked, taken back. A quick look at Hailpaw indicated that he had no idea what their conversation was going to be about. "Oh… okay then. I guess I'll see you there?"

Crowfrost flicked his tail. "Sure. See you there."

After sending Hailpaw one more encouraging glance, I reluctantly I tore myself away from the mentor and apprentice and started towards the training hollow. _StarClan, if you're listening, please let Hailpaw show up alive._

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

We walked a silence for a minute, at least until I was sure that we were out of earshot, and then I said, "You know, you're going about it all the wrong way."

Hailpaw's expression didn't change much, other than a slight wrinkle in his nose. "I'm going about _what_ the wrong way?"

"Impressing Ashpaw," I replied easily, as if the answer was obvious. "During our training sessions you go easy on her, or you just don't fight her at all. That's why you've not been improving."

This time Hailpaw had a much stronger reaction. Fear flashed in his dark blue eyes, and his ears twitched, although he was quick to school his features. "I don't know what you're talking about," he mumbled.

I pretended not to hear him as I went on. "She-cats are a bit of a mystery. You may think that Ashpaw appreciates you letting her win, but in reality you're only frustrating her. She's training to be a warrior too, and she wants to be challenged." Hailpaw didn't verbally respond, but on instinct his ears flicked backwards; a sign that he was listening.

"Look at Cloverpaw and Honeypaw, for example. Battle moves seem to come easily to Cloverpaw, and now that she's mastered this move, she wants to learn something more challenging. But she can't because her partner isn't on the same level as she is. And you've seen how frustrated Cloverpaw is getting."

For a moment I didn't think Hailpaw was going to reply, and then he murmured, "But I don't want to hurt her."

I snorted. "Ashpaw is two moons older than you; she's already mastered this move. This is kits-play for her. And besides that, your claws are sheathed. You won't hurt her; at the very most, you'll knock the wind out of her for a few heart-beats."

A frown tugged at the corners of Hailpaw's lips. "And that… _impresses_ she-cats? When you knock the wind out of them?"

"Not exactly when you wind them; when you present them with a real challenge. When you demonstrate what a skilled fighter you are. I know it sounds strange - all she-cats are - but trust me, it works. I never went easy on Pinenose when we had to be partners, and look at us - we ended up mates!"

Hailpaw shot me a look of complete and utter horror. " _You were mates with Pinenose_?!" he cried.

Too late I remembered that Pinenose was the young tom's mother. "Uh, forget I said that!" I said quickly. "We were only mates for a couple days anyways, and it was before she fell for Ratscar. Don't worry, you are _definitely_ Ratscar's son!"

"I can't believe it," Hailpaw muttered in a state of bewilderment. "You and Pinenose… _my mother_ …"

"Please," I begged him, "Just forget about it!"

 **Dawn Frost**

When we finally arrived at the training hollow I was relieved. Hailpaw hadn't spoken to me since my accidental confession, and I couldn't look at him without my ears burning. It was safe to say that we were thoroughly embarrassed, both for ourselves and each other.

The hollow fell silent when we entered, and I glanced around at my clanmates, confused. "What did we miss?" I asked, hesitantly.

Ivytail shot Honeypaw and Cloverpaw a stern look. "Honeypaw and Cloverpaw don't understand why they can't stand guard for the fox."

"Crowfrost already told you, you're too young and inexperienced," Owlclaw said firmly. "A fox would shred you without a second thought."

"But we could fight it!" Cloverpaw protested. " _We_ would shred _it_!"

Ivytail snorted. "Just because you've mastered the most basic battle technique does not mean you could handle a fox, Cloverpaw. And Honeypaw, the only way you could defeat a fox is if it took a look at you and passed out laughing!"

Cloverpaw glared at her paws, and Honeypaw flattened her ears against her head. "We could take it together," she whimpered. "If there were two of us-"

"Then you would _both die_ ," I interrupted her. "Foxes aren't meant to be taken lightly, especially during leaf-bare. It's still early so this fox probably isn't starving, but it'll be hungry, and you would make a delicious meal."

 _You're disgusting_ , my conscious snarled. _I can't believe you think a cat would make a delicious meal!_

 _Wha-? I didn't mean for me, I meant for the fox!_

 _Sure you did. Sicko!_

 _Oh, for the love of StarClan!_ "Come on," I growled. "Partner up and take your positions."

 **Dawn Frost**

I found myself holding my breath as Hailpaw and Ashpaw circled each other, heads low and steps light. Hailpaw seemed to move with purpose now, but I couldn't be sure he would follow through with the attack. Ashpaw looked okay, but she didn't seem particularly alert; clearly she wasn't expecting Hailpaw to follow through with it either.

A chilly breeze drifted through the hollow, and Dawnpelt and I shivered at the same moment. "I hate leaf-bare," she growled quietly.

"At least your pelt is thick and fluffy," I responded bitterly. "Mine is thick, but it's sleek, not fluffy. All it does is hold the cold once it's seeped past my fur."

"Can we please not talk about how thick and fluffy my pelt is again?" Dawnpelt shot me a half-smile. "We've already covered that."

"Sureee," I drawled out. "Because there's _so_ many other topics for us to discuss."

The creamy-colored she-cat scoffed. "You mean the only thing you want to talk about is my pelt?"

"That's not what I said."

"But it's what you implied."

"I implied nothing!"

 _That's exactly what you were implying._

"Would you shut-up?" I demanded. "I'm getting really sick of listening to your constant-..." I trailed off when I realized that I was arguing with my conscious - _out loud._

Dawnpelt stared at me. "Who are talking to?"

"Not the voice inside my head!"

Great StarClan, strike me with lightning and take me now.

 _StarClan doesn't want you._

"I said **shut-up** , you _stupid_ \- I'm talking out loud again, aren't I?"

"I'll pretend it didn't happen if you do too," Dawnpelt mumbled, hazel gaze trained on the apprentices and thoroughly freaked out.

"Deal."

Instead I returned my attention to the apprentices, just in time to watch Ashpaw lunge for Hailpaw. The light gray tom ducked, prompting Ashpaw's paws to be splayed on either side of him. Then he bolted forward, and successfully knocked the unsuspecting she-cat down.

"Hailpaw, you did it!" Dawnpelt exclaimed.

"It's about time," I added, although I couldn't help but grin. Even if Hailpaw and I didn't have a very good relationship, I was still his mentor and he was still my apprentice. I may not like it, but at the end of the day his abilities reflected my own.

Owlclaw stopped coaching Cloverpaw for a moment to shoot us a warm smile. "Congrats, Hailpaw."

Cloverpaw shot her brother a grin as well. " _Finally_ you got it! Now we can train together back at camp!"

A smile ghosted Hailpaw's lips and I found myself wanting to claw the apprentice for not displaying more emotion - this was a big deal! _Finally_ , after days of struggle, Hailpaw performed the move right! But then Ashpaw leaned forward and placed a swift lick on her partner's cheek, and Hailpaw's eyes widened so much that he resembled an owl, and I had to laugh.

 **Dawn Frost**

My steps were light as we padded back to camp. Hailpaw had performed the move correctly three more times, each time better than the last. It was safe to say that battle moves wouldn't come as easily to him as Cloverpaw, but he was definitely improving, and right now that seemed like a blessing from StarClan.

Honeypaw was still struggling, and her brother's recent success only seemed to send her deeper into her slump. But nonetheless she congratulated Hailpaw, and told him she was proud of him. _At least she can be happy for him,_ I thought. Ivytail could hardly stand to look at Honeypaw at this point.

"I'm going to go check on Starlingwing and Waspstripe," I announced to the rest of the patrol. "See if they have anything to report on the fox."

"I'll go with you," Dawnpelt offered. For a moment I was taken back by her offer, and then I remembered our truce. She was still trying to form a friendship with me, and I couldn't help but smile at the thought. Truthfully I never thought Dawnpelt would last this long.

I shrugged and said, "Sure, come on."

We abandoned our clanmates and started trekking through the marshes, to the pond where Starlingwing and Waspstripe were stationed. The soggy ground squished between my paw pads, and usually I didn't mind it, but it was cold. _At least I don't have to stand guard in the marshes,_ I thought. _Starlingwing and Waspstripe are probably hating life right about now._

"What exactly did you say to Hailpaw?" Dawnpelt asked me, breaking our silence.

"Wouldn't you like to know," I teased.

The creamy-colored she-cat narrowed her eyes playfully and shouldered me. "Come on, you can tell me. I can keep a secret."

"Swear on StarClan?"

"I swear on StarClan."

"You know that if you break this promise, StarClan will strike you dead, correct?"

"Crowfrost!"

"Okay!" I exclaimed, hastily. "I was just making sure you understood the severity of the situation. On our way over to the training hollow, I told him that Pinenose and I used to be mates."

Dawnpelt stared at me. "You didn't."

"I did," I said with a nod. "Not on purpose, but it slipped out."

"You told him-... Great StarClan, Crowfrost! That's why he looked so awkward when you showed up at the hollow! I thought you might have confronted him about his crush on Ashpaw."

"Oh, I did that too! I told him that he was going about impressing her the wrong way, and that if he really wanted to impress her, he should present her with more of a challenge."

Dawnpelt huffed. "Why didn't you tell me _that_ first? Why was the Pinenose bit necessary?"

I shrugged weakly. "Honestly, that's the part of the conversation that stood out to me."

The gorgeous warrior rolled her hazel eyes. "You're a piece of work, you know that?"

"I've been told that a time or two, yes."

We fell into a friendly atmosphere where we shot playful insults at each other, and slowly my grin started to widen. At times like this, when we were alone, talking to Dawnpelt was almost as easy as talking to… well, maybe not Smokefoot or Scorchfur, but certainly Littlecloud or Owlclaw.

Soon enough the pond came into view, and I called out, "Hey guys! Anything interesting to report?"

Starlingwing and Waspstripe turned around. "Nothing to report about foxes," Starlingwing started with a wicked grin. "But _Waspstripe_ -"

"You swore you wouldn't tell anyone!" the ginger and brown tom growled. "Starlingwing!"

"Ohh, what'd he say, Starlingwing?" I asked, interested.

"See, he has this plan to-"

" **Starlingwing**!"

"Oh, quit being such a buzzkill, Waspstripe," I rebuked lightly. "Come on, you can tell us! Or," I shot Dawnpelt a glance. "You can tell _me_ , at least. I might be cautious sharing secrets with Dawnpelt."

Dawnpelt cuffed my ear. "You're a lizard-brain," she declared. "Starlingwing, stop teasing Waspstripe."

" _Thank you, Dawnpelt,_ " Waspstripe growled, as he shot a pointed glare at Starlingwing.

The dark ginger tom rolled his eyes. "Fine, whatever. No, Crowfrost, we have nothing to report."

"Good," I said with a nod. And then another thought struck me. "What about rabbits?"

Waspstripe blinked, taken back. "Rabbits?" he echoed. Then his features lit up in realization. "Oh, you mean that huge one that Starlingwing let escape! The one you put a bet on?"

"Okay, first of all, I didn't _let it_ escape-"

Waspstripe shook his head. "Sorry Crowfrost, we haven't seen or scented any rabbits. It's probably darted back to WindClan by this point, or it's deep in some tunnel."

But I wasn't so sure. "Well, keep your eyes open. I have a good feeling about this rabbit."

We bid the pair of friends farewell, and then started back to camp. "Do you honestly believe there's a rabbit in ShadowClan?" Dawnpelt asked, dubiously.

I shrugged. "I think there _could_ be. Why, you don't?"

"Maybe at one point, but not anymore. It's been almost a moon since Starlingwing said he saw it."

"Well, then you and Smokefoot can sit around and gossip about how there's no rabbit," I said with a roll of my eyes. "That tom is so ignorant, he's not even open to the idea!"

Dawnpelt glanced at me. "You two are really close, aren't you?"

"He's like a brother to me," I immediately replied. "Scorchfur is my best friend. He keeps me on the straight and narrow, attempts to control the size of my ego. But Smokefoot…" I trailed off and shook my head. "I don't know where I'd be without him, honestly. He's always been there, even… even when no one else wanted to be."

The words were hard to get out, and once I did a frown played across my lips. Memories danced inside my head and across my mind, not all of them good. I wished I could forget most of them.

Dawnpelt gazed at me and I watched as concern blossomed in her hazel eyes. "What do you-"

"Nothing," I cut her off, sharply. "Don't worry about it." If I knew Dawnpelt at all I knew she would argue with me, so I was swift to change the topic. "Hey, I need you to take a rotation."

The hazel-eyed warrior sighed loudly, clearly not pleased with the change of topic. "Fine. When?"

"Tonight, at the pond. You and Spikefur can relieve Grassheart and Scorchfur, and then tomorrow I'll-" I stopped when I realized Dawnpelt wasn't beside me anymore. I glanced back, surprised when I saw her. She looked like a rabbit caught on the thunderpath.

"I can't," she said.

I raised an eyebrow. "Why not? Is it because of Spikefur? I was going to pair you with Owlclaw, but then I noticed you and Spikefur together during the announcements, and I thought you might be friends." Dawnpelt didn't reply, and I took a step towards her. "Dawnpelt, are you-"

"I'll do it tomorrow morning," Dawnpelt interrupted me. "Or during the afternoon. But I can't do it tonight, or- I can't... do it at night, _at all_."

My brow creased with confusion. "Why not? There's no way you have something to do _every single night_."

Dawnpelt swallowed thickly. _What in the name of StarClan is bothering her?_ "It's not that I'm busy," she started slowly. "It's that… I… I don't like the dark."

I blinked, caught off guard and confused. "You don't like the dark?" I echoed. "What does that mean?"

If looks could kill, I might be dead.

And then it hit me. "Wait a second, you mean you're _scared of the dark_?"

Dawnpelt's pained expression was all the confirmation I needed.

"You're kidding, right?" I checked. "I mean, you're a _ShadowClan warrior_. Some of us prefer the night to the day! We fight best in the dark, hunt best in the dark…" I trailed off, stunned.

Dawnpelt couldn't even look me in the eye when she mumbled, "Not all of us."

"How… _what_?" I couldn't piece together a coherent thought. "But you stood guard last night, and you've been apart of ambushes! Heck, when I would take Olivenose out for night training, you would come too!"

The creamy-colored she-cat exhaled softly. "I stood guard because I was right outside camp; I knew where everyone was. And the only reason I could participate in ambushes and night training is because I was in a large group. But by myself, or even with another cat, I'm a mess."

I wanted to continue to argue with her. We were known as the night owls of the clans. For StarClan's sake, it's the reason we were called _ShadowClan_ \- because we thrived in the shadows, in the _dark_! Dawnpelt couldn't be afraid of it! It wasn't the ShadowClan way!

And yet, the more I thought about it, the more it started to make sense. Dawnpelt was always one of the first cats to go to sleep. She never took midnight strolls. Rarely did she even want to stand guard outside the camp. And now that I _really_ thought about it, she always _did_ seem a bit on edge when she trained during the night as an apprentice.

"You look disgusted with me," Dawnpelt remarked.

"That's because I _am_ disgusted with you," I immediately responded. "What kind of ShadowClan warrior is scared of the dark? That's exactly like… if you were a RiverClan warrior who hated to swim!"

"Leopardstar."

I blinked, caught off guard. "What?"

"As an apprentice, Leopardstar hated water," Dawnpelt said calmly. "Minnowtail told me when we were apprentices."

I growled and shook my head. "Whatever, that's totally different. How are you supposed to help me with Hailpaw's night training? I'm starting it after this next Gathering!"

Dawnpelt flicked her tail, almost nervously. "I actually meant to talk to you about that. I-I won't be able to go with you."

My eyes widened in alarm. "You _what_?! You have to come with us - Hailpaw's performs best whenever you're around!" I didn't mention that I'd come to _accept_ , almost _welcome_ Dawnpelt's presence during our training sessions. We'd formed some kind of routine, where I was clearly the mentor in control, but she would add helpful comments or suggestions whenever she saw fit. Our partnership was actually going very well. If Dawnpelt just suddenly… _wasn't there_ , it would throw both Hailpaw and myself off. "Dawnpelt, you have to be there!"

But the hazel-eyed warrior stood firm. "I can't," she said with a shake of her head. "I'll still help during the day, but during the night… I just…" the pained expression she wore told me that this wasn't an easy decision for her to make.

I held her gaze for a moment longer, and then I growled, "Fine then. I guess we'll just have to manage without you. Tomorrow, you can take the afternoon rotation by the pond."

"Okay," Dawnpelt murmured softly. "I'll be ready."

We started back to camp again, except this time, there were no playful insults or teasing remarks to fill the silence.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

The next day was uneventful. There were still no fox sightings, and Crowfrost seemed to have already forgotten about my fear of the dark. Frankly I was relieved; there were only a few cats who knew about my secret, and I'd like to keep it that way.

Training that day was discouraging. While Hailpaw continued to improve, Honeypaw seemed to get worse, if that was even possible. I asked her if she would like to train with me afterwards, just the two of us, and she happily agreed. We were just finishing our private session when Tigerheart pulled me aside.

"I'm in the middle of something, Tigerheart," I said softly. "Honeypaw _needs_ this extra training."

Tigerheart flicked his tail. "You two have been at it for ages," he replied. "Just pick up where you left off tomorrow. I want to talk to you about something."

"It's okay Dawnpelt," Honeypaw called before I could argue. I glanced backwards and noticed that while the she-cat's sides were heaving, she wore a pleased smile. "We can stop for today, if you'd like."

I hesitated. "Do you promise to go straight back to camp?"

Honeypaw nodded. "Promise. I'll go see Littlecloud and talk to him." She looked around as if to confirm that no one else was listening, and then whispered, "Sometimes, if I help him, he sneaks me _honey_!"

I purred softly. "Alright, but be careful. Watch out for foxes!"

Honeypaw rolled her light blue eyes; clearly she was tired of all this talk about foxes. The young tabby she-cat brushed past Tigerheart and I, and once we were alone, I looked at my littermate. "So, what's so important that you had to disrupt us?"

Tigerheart turned around gestured for me to keep up with him. "What's going on between you and Crowfrost?" he asked, blunt and to the point.

I recoiled, surprised. "What are you talking about?"

"You two have been acting differently," Tigerheart meowed. "You get along in camp now, you have civil conversations, you didn't vote for a new deputy yesterday…" he trailed off and gazed expectantly at me.

The creamy fur along my spine bristled. "Not that it's any of your business, but we're friends now." Maybe I was behaving defensively, but I already hated what Tigerheart was implying.

The amber-eyed tom snorted. "It doesn't seem that simple."

"But it is," I replied evenly. "I don't know why you think it's important."

"Don't you remember everything he's said to you?" Tigerheart pressed. "Everything he's done to you? It's his fault you went into your depressed slump!"

"He's also the reason I came out of it!" I argued. "When no one else could reach me, Crowfrost could!" _When no one else could reach me… Crowfrost could…_

Tigerheart shook his head. "Do you even hear yourself right now? Crowfrost isn't someone that you want to be involved with, Dawnpelt."

"I'm not involved with him!" I exclaimed. "We're just _friends_ \- and most days we're hardly even that!

Tigerheart stopped walking and turned to give me his full attention. "He's hurt you before and he'll do it again without a second thought," he meowed. "Come on Dusk, you're smarter than this; don't even give him the opportunity! I don't-" he cut himself off, and then began again. "I don't want to see him hurt you again."

I narrowed my hazel eyes but didn't reply. Tigerheart must have realized that he wasn't going to get another response from me, because he sighed and touched his tail to my flank. "Just be careful, alright? Don't get too close to him." Then he turned around and started towards camp, and left me alone with my thoughts.

 _He's worrying about nothing. Crowfrost and I are only friends. Not close friends, not best friends; friends. We still argue, we still insult each other. That will never change. We're just… friendlier than we used to be._

But then my mind flashed back to yesterday, when we were on our way to the pond, and we teased each other and joked. Our pelts would brush for a moment and neither of us seemed to notice. To someone who didn't know us, they might have thought we were flirting.

I squeezed my eyes shut. _And Tigerheart didn't even see that. If he had, he would've been much more insistent._

But there was nothing romantic between us. There never would be. The very idea was laughable.

 _"He's hurt you before… I don't want to see him hurt you again…"_

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **So, Dawnpelt's afraid of the dark. What do you think Crowfrost is afriad of?**

 **#Seriously guys, I need an idea!**

* * *

 **Can we just take a moment to appreciate the fact that my last three updates have all been pretty consistent?**

 **So this chapter was fun to write! A lot happened, even if it's one of the shortest chapters thus far. You finally met Cherryleaf; Dawnpelt and Olivenose made up; a fox may be in ShadowClan; and we've finally discovered why Dawnpelt was so anxious whenever night training is mentioned (reference to Chapter Two and Chapter Five). And did you guys notice how strange Crowfrost started acting when Dawnpelt asked him about Smokefoot? Hmm.**

 **Just in case you didn't get what the lyrics are referring to, it's Crowfrost's view of Dawnpelt's fear of the dark. Crowfrost is one of those cats who are fiercely proud of their clan, and the fact that Dawnpelt is afriad of the very aspect that defines them... that doesn't sit well with him.**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	9. Stargazing

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

* * *

 **Chapter Nine - Stargazing**

* * *

 **"Cause in a sky full of stars, I think I saw you." - Sky Full of Stars, Coldplay**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

" _Dawnpelt, wake up_! _Dawnpelt_!"

My eyes fluttered open and I had to blink a few times until I realized that Crowfrost was hovering over me. "What?" I asked, my question interrupted by the yawn that split my jaws.

"Come on, I need you to get up, _now_."

I frowned at the black and white warrior, my mind still foggy with sleep. I glanced past Crowfrost, outside of the den, and saw that the sky was black. I scoffed and laid my head down once more. "Nice try, but it's too early to send out the dawn patrols. Now go away before I claw your ears off your head."

" _Dawnpelt_ ," Crowfrost hissed softly in my ear. " _Honeypaw and Cloverpaw are gone_! _They went to look for the fox_!"

And suddenly I was wide awake.

" **Wha** -" I nearly screeched, but Crowfrost shoved his tail across my mouth.

" _Shh_!" he hissed again. "I'm not trying to alert the whole camp! Follow me." The ShadowClan deputy stepped easily over his clanmates, and I was quick to follow in his steps. When I made it outside I fixed my concerned gaze on Crowfrost.

"Please tell me this is a prank," I pleaded.

Crowfrost scoffed. "Are you serious? Even I wouldn't joke about this!" He jerked his head towards the camp exit. "Come on, I already sent Owlclaw and Ivytail ahead of us. They're going to check with the guards and by the training hollow, we're heading towards the Eastern part of the territory."

I'd already started towards the exit, and then I froze. "The Eastern part?" I echoed. "But… there's nothing there. No borders, no twolegs. We never go there!"

"Exactly," Crowfrost agreed, his expression grim. "So if you were a fox, where would you go?" My hazel eyes widened. "Come on," he mumbled. "If we're quick enough, we might be able to find them before that fox does."

 **Dawn Frost**

It was dark.

So, so dark.

I tried not to let my thoughts linger on the darkness that surrounded us, or the shadows that clinged to me like a second pelt. Instead I focused on breathing, and forced my gaze to not waver from the path in front of me. Crowfrost was running a little ways in front of me, picking the route. I let him.

All of a sudden he slid to a perfect halt, and spun around to face me. His frosty-blue eyes were bright, and hope ignited in my chest. "Have you picked up their scent trail?" I asked.

"No," Crowfrost replied smugly. "And we're not going to; Honeypaw and Cloverpaw are still back at camp, snuggled deep in their nests."

"Wh-what?" My brow creased in confusion. "But… you said they left camp! You said they went to look for the fox!" my voice rose steadily with every word until I was practically screaming, and yet, Crowfrost didn't even blink.

"Trust me, I still brought you out here for a good reason," Crowfrost meowed, as a smirk played across his lips. "We're going to get you over your fear of the dark."

"Crowfrost!" I snarled. "That's not- you _can't_ -" I shook my head, dumbfounded. "This isn't funny!"

"It's not supposed to be funny," he replied simply.

I narrowed my eyes. "I'm going back to camp," I spat. "You can't keep me out here!"

The blue-eyed tom shrugged. "No, I can't. But what's going to happen to you once you get lost?"

I scoffed. "I won't-"

"You will," Crowfrost interrupted me. "You don't know this part of the territory well enough to just walk home, and I made sure to take the most complicated path here." His pale blue eyes gleamed in the night. "Why do you think I took the lead?"

My jaw dropped. "You mean you got us both lost just so you-"

"Oh, I'm not lost," Crowfrost meowed, amused. "I've spent a lot of time here these past couple of days, ever since you told me about your ridiculous fear. Trust me, I've got this all planned out."

Dread started to build in my chest. It was becoming harder and harder to block out the darkness. "Crowfrost," I started slowly. "I don't know what you have planned, but whatever it is, I don't want to do it."

"You don't have much of a choice, unless you want to risk getting lost."

The darkness was starting to close in. "You can't-"

"Don't worry, it'll be easy!" Crowfrost exclaimed. His enthusiasm only served to further unnerve me. "I'm going to run through these woods, and you're going to chase me. As long as you don't lose me or my scent, you'll be fine."

 _No, no I can't do this!_ "Crowfrost, I-I can't-"

"On your mark, get set-"

"Crowfrost, _please_ -"

His smirk was still intact, and his eyes positively gleamed. "Go."

Then he was running, and I had no choice but to follow.

 **Dawn Frost**

He wasn't making it easy for me. He dodged trees, ducked underneath branches, and lept over fallen logs. His stride was long and his steps were sure-footed, whilst I struggled to keep up with him. It didn't help that, aside from his paws and chest, Crowfrost's pelt was completely black and blended in perfectly with the night.

Night. Black. Darkness.

I squeezed my eyes shut and paid the price when I tripped over a log. I yelped in pain and surprise, but if Crowfrost heard me then he ignored my cry, and kept running. I called his name. He didn't glance back.

 _I can't lose him, I can't!_ I quickly scrambled to my paws and raced to catch up with him.

Thankfully I could follow his scent trail and soon I caught sight of his white paws, which still drummed easily on the cold, marshy ground.

Cold. Freezing. Darkness.

I stumbled again, this time when I accidentally stepped into a hole. I fell and then hurried to regain my footing; _If I lose him I'll never find my way out!_

But this time I couldn't follow his scent trail. It simply… _vanished!_ I darted around, in hopes of catching a whiff of something familiar, but there was nothing. Nothing.

"Crowfrost!" I called desperately. " _Crowfrost_!"

Nothing. Silence. Darkness.

I crumbled to the ground and curled up as tightly as I could, as I tried to fight off the shadows. "Tawnypelt! Rowanstar!" I screamed, as if they could hear me, and would come sprinting to my rescue. "Tigerheart!" I was so cold…

" _Somebody_!" I cried. My voice sounded so familiar, as if it hadn't changed at all. "Somebody." I buried my head between my paws and cried. "S-Somebody… please…"

Night. Freezing. Darkness. Alone.

"Hey," a voice whispered softly in my ear, what felt like moons later. "Hey, it's okay. You're not alone." I didn't stir; it was a trick. There was no one there. I was imagining Crowfrost's voice.

"Hey," the voice whispered again, this time accompanied by a gentle lick across the top of my head. "Dawnpelt, you're not alone. I'm still here."

I risked a glance up, and came face to face with Crowfrost. "Y-you left me," I whimpered. "You knew I was scared, and you left me…" The cruelty behind the action struck me like lightning.

Crowfrost shook his head. "I never left you," he meowed. "I was only a couple steps ahead of you the entire time."

"You didn't slow down when I fell."

"Because I knew you would pick yourself back up."

I blinked. Slowly my tears had stopped falling. "Where did you go? I've been here for ages..."

He shook his head again. "No you haven't; it's only been a minute. It just feels like longer." He rasped his tongue across my head again, and had I been in a less fearful state of mind, I would have jerked away. "Come on, I want to show you something."

I was slowly regaining my wits, and mustered up the best glare that I could. "I want to go home," I growled. "You've shown me enough."

And then Crowfrost had _the nerve_ to _smirk_ at me! "I promise, after this, you won't want to go home."

 **Dawn Frost**

It wasn't like I had much choice but to follow him. If I tried to make it back to camp myself I would get lost, and that was assuming I didn't break down again before then.

We walked, this time side by side, to assure that he didn't dart off suddenly. Our pelts brushed once or twice and I had to swallow a lump in my throat each time they did. _Surely other she-cats aren't this uneasy around him._

"We're almost there," Crowfrost spoke up. "We just have to climb this tree.

I narrowed my eyes. "Climb?"

Crowfrost shot me a smirk. "Don't tell me you think only ThunderClan cats can climb." Without waiting for a response he jumped on the trunk of the stocky tree, and then started to claw his way up. I inhaled a breath and then followed him.

It wasn't easy, but it wasn't difficult. ShadowClan cats didn't climb trees very often - that was ThunderClan's forte, and pine trees weren't exactly climbing material - but every apprentice was taught the basics of tree climbing at one point or another. Hailpaw and his sisters would most likely learn how to within the next moon or so.

Crowfrost stopped when he reached a long, narrow branch. I peered past my companion and noticed that after the branch ended there was a gap, and then a branch that belonged to another tree hung in the air. It was like a bridge that was missing its middle.

"Please don't tell me-"

"We have to jump it," Crowfrost finished with a nod.

I sighed, aloud. "I hate you."

Crowfrost chuckled and then started to make his way across the narrow branch. Careful step by careful step, he edged closer to the gap. Once he was a mouse-tail out he leapt, and I gasped. _StarClan please don't let him fall!_

It occurred to me that, after everything he put me through that night, I should have prayed that he _did_ fall. I tried not to dwell on this thought.

Crowfrost turned around to look at me, smug smirk perfectly in tact. "Your turn!" he called.

I swallowed and then followed in his steps. The branch shook from beneath my paws and I had to pause several times to gather my courage and my wits. I couldn't believe my predicament; lost in the forest with Crowfrost as my guide, up in a tree, edging across an unstable branch.

In the dark.

I nearly stumbled when I remembered how dark it was, and was quick to regain my footing. _Don't focus on the dark, don't focus on the dark!_

As if Crowfrost could read my thoughts he called, "Don't think about it, Dawnpelt! Come on, just a little closer… now stop! Crouch down, and then leap."

I couldn't help it. I glanced down, and swallowed again when I realized just how high up I was. If I fell I would undoubtedly snap my neck.

"Don't think about it," Crowfrost called again. "It's not as bad as you think it is."

 _How is he not even the least bit nervous?!_ I wondered, somewhat annoyed. I'd never believed that anyone - not even Tigerstar himself - could be completely fearless. Everyone had that one fear that haunted them. But right then, as I raised my gaze to look Crowfrost in the eye, I wondered if I was wrong. I wondered if I was looking at the one cat who was fearless.

"What if I fall?" I whispered.

"Oh, but Dawnpelt," Crowfrost started, pale blue eyes agleam. "What if you _fly_?"

I took a breath to steady myself, sent a quick prayer to StarClan, and then leapt. I didn't expect to make it to the other side, so when I landed on the branch my eyes widened with shock. "I-I did it," I stammered.

Crowfrost purred, and when I looked up at him I saw something else gleaming in his eyes; pride. He was _proud_ of me. "I knew you could do it," he meowed easily, and then flicked me with his tail. "Come on, we're almost there."

I groaned. "You said this was it!"

"Of course I said that. How else would I have convinced you to climb this deathtrap?" He had a point. "Follow me."

 **Dawn Frost**

It wasn't that much further. We scaled a few more branches, these ones sturdier than the last one, thank StarClan, and then took one more, less daring leap. The branch we ended up on was large and strong. All around us, enclosing us, were hanging vines with dying flowers, and I realized that we were standing inside a weeping willow tree. I felt more at ease than I'd felt that entire night.

"Okay," Crowfrost whispered in my ear. "We're here. Now, look up."

I did, and the first thing I noted was the large hole above our heads. There were no branches to blotch our view, and for the first time that night, I could really see the sky.

My second thought was, _And what a view it is._

I gasped softly. Thousands of stars were scattered across the silverpelt, twinkling and glimmering beautifully. Thin, pale wisps of clouds floated in the air, and contrasted with the dark blue of the sky. The moon was nearly full and radiated light.

"It's gorgeous," I breathed. "How did you find this place?"

Crowfrost smirked, clearly proud of himself. "It wasn't easy," he started. "It took a couple days to find. I didn't actually stumble upon it until last night."

I tore my gaze away from the breathtaking sight. "You mean you've spent your nights out here, looking for a place like this? Why would you go through all that trouble for _me_?"

The blue-eyed tom shrugged, as if the answer were simple. "Because your fear is lizard-brain," he meowed, bluntly.

"Thanks," I scoffed.

His smirk returned and he nudged me, playfully. "Because your fear is _irrational._ You're a fierce ShadowClan warrior, you can't be afraid of the very aspect that defines us! Besides," he raised his own gaze to the sky above us. "I couldn't let you spend your nights in a boring ol' den, and miss views like _this_." I followed his lead and looked up as well, and then had to begrudgingly agree; this view wouldn't have been nearly as spectacular in the day.

The cold wind blowed and stirred the long, hanging branches. I shivered; it was getting cold quick, if even I was starting to feel the chill.

I nearly jumped out of my fur when Crowfrost pressed his side against mine. "What are you-"

"Saving us from freezing to death," he replied. "You're welcome."

I glared at him but held still when he pressed against me again. As much as I hated to admit it, it was much warmer like this. We sat in silence for a few minutes; I was too busy attempting to appear comfortable with our positions even though I was anything but, and he was content.

Finally he asked, "So, why _are_ you afraid of the dark?"

I frowned. "No, no we're not having that conversation. Not until you tell me what _you're_ afraid of."

Crowfrost laughed. " _Me, afraid of something_? You're dreaming."

"No one is fearless."

"Um, I'm pretty sure that's what I just implied. Or can you not read sarcasm?"

I shrugged, and tried to ignore when our pelts brushed. "Fine then, suit yourself. But I'm not telling you my story until you tell me yours." He already knew more about me than I was comfortable with.

"Fine," Crowfrost agreed easily. "I guess I'll just never know."

"I guess not."

I could tell my nonchalance annoyed him, and I allowed myself a small smirk. Finally, the tables had turned.

"We should be getting back to camp soon anyway," he black and white tom grumbled.

"Probably."

He glanced at me. Curiosity replaced the irritation in his eyes. "So, are you up for doing this again?"

I bit my lip. "When?"

"Tomorrow. And the night after that, and we'll keep doing it until you're totally comfortable in the dark."

I sighed. "Crowfrost, it's not that easy. You don't get over a fear just like that. It could take moons."

"Then it's a good thing we have time, isn't it?"

I looked at him. "Are you serious?"

He nodded. "When I start training Hailpaw in the dark, I'll need you. He responds better when you're there. And I.." he trailed off for a moment. "I've kinda gotten used to you being there. It would throw me _and_ Hailpaw off if you weren't."

 _Well when you put it like that…_ "Okay," I said, as a smile played across my lips. "Then if you're willing, I guess I am too." When Crowfrost shot me a pearly grin I found myself wondering just what I'd agreed to.

 **Dawn Frost**

The next couple of nights were challenging. The more I thought about it the tempted I was to back out of our midnight meetings, but Crowfrost stubbornly refused to give me the opportunity. I'd told him I was going to work with him, and he was going to hold me to it.

I didn't see much improvement in myself. I couldn't drift more than a few tail-lengths away from Crowfrost before I started to panic, and I still jumped every time I heard a branch snap or an owl hoot. The only moment I didn't feel on edge was when we finally reached the weeping willow-like tree, and Crowfrost and I admired the star-dusted sky.

I actually grew to look forward to those moments. It was during those moments that Crowfrost and I talked easily, as we exchanged playful quips and remarks. Every night I discovered a little bit more about the tom that so many cats respected and adored.

His favorite piece of fresh-kill was spotted toads; he hated the heat but he despised the cold (his favorite season was new-leaf); he knew how to swim because, as an apprentice, he convinced a RiverClan she-cat to teach him; one time he flirted with Thornclaw on a dare, and the ThunderClan warrior has been wary around him ever since.

"You flirted with _Thornclaw_ on a dare?" I echoed in disbelief. "Who in the name of StarClan dared you to do that?" And how was Crowfrost still alive?!

"Smokefoot," Crowfrost replied. "We dared each other, actually. He dared me to flirt with Thornclaw, and I dared him to flirt with Breezepelt." he smirked. "It was definitely worth it. Breezepelt's expression was priceless."

I shook my head. "I don't even know what to say to that. You two have had some very… _interesting_ moments together."

"Who? Me and Thornclaw?"

I rolled my hazel orbs. " _No,_ lizard-brain. You and Smokefoot!"

"Oh," Crowfrost blinked. "That would make more sense. But, yeah, I guess we have."

I returned my attention to the sky. "You know… a couple days ago, before you found out about my fear of the dark, we were talking about you and Smokefoot and you acted really strange. You said something about how he's always been there for you." I shot him a side-glance, "I don't suppose there's a story behind that?"

Crowfrost didn't look away from the sky. "No." his answer was cold and crisp.

I raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure about that?"

He never responded.

 **Dawn Frost**

Two nights later and the curiosity was eating me alive. Typically I tried to stay out of other's business, but the way Crowfrost responded… there was definitely a story there.

 _Maybe I'll get an answer out of him tonight,_ I thought, as a yawn split my jaws. Olivenose shot me a concerned glance.

"Are you okay?" she asked. "That's the third time you've yawned since we left camp."

I flicked an ear, in an attempt to look more alert. "Yeah, I just couldn't sleep very easily last night. This fox has me on edge." Later it would bother me how effortlessly I'd lied to my best friend. But I didn't want to tell her about my nights with Crowfrost just yet. There was nothing romantic between us, but I didn't want to make Olivenose paranoid.

Olivenose sighed, as she shifted on her haunches. At that moment, we were on fox-alert by the pond. Crowfrost has assigned us to evening guard duty together, and was training Hailpaw by himself that afternoon. "I almost wish it _would_ show up," Olivenose meowed. "I hate standing guard - the sooner we can chase it out, the better!" It was certainly a clever fox. No one had reported any sightings, but lately the patrols had caught its scent. Yesterday morning, Stoatfur brought back the remains of a bird completely drenched in fox scent.

I shot Olivenose a small smile. "Crowfrost wants it out too. He's convinced it's going to steal his rabbit."

"The one he placed the bet on?" Olivenose asked, as a smile played across her own lips. "Figures that's what _Crowfrost_ is worried about." Her smile faded and I blinked, confused.

"What's with the down expression?"

The tortoiseshell and white she-cat sighed. "It's just… Grassheart's plan has me worried. What if it works, and they really do become mates?"

I scoffed. "Crowfrost and Grassheart? Please. They wouldn't even be able to share a nest - between their combined egos, there'd be no room!"

Olivenose didn't seem very reassured. "But you have to admit, it's not a horrible plan. Everyone knows that Crowfrost takes it as a personal challenge when a she-cat isn't interested in him."

I fixed my best friend with a hard look. "Olivenose," I started seriously. "You don't have a thing to worry about. Everyone also knows that Crowfrost can't stand cats who trained in the Dark Forest, and guess what? _Grassheart trained there_."

Olivenose flattened her ears against her head; I couldn't believe this was bothering her so much! "But now that he's being so far when he assigns cats to patrols and such, what if-"

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, come on, don't tell me you've fallen for that act. Crowfrost is just trying to look fair; his opinions haven't changed a bit." Even a blind lizard could tell that Crowfrost still resented the Dark Forest trainees.

Olivenose started to perk up. "You think so?" she asked hopefully.

"Positive," I replied easily. "I just feel bad for Waspstripe. I can't believe she's playing him like that."

Olivenose wrinkled her nose. "I know! It's just cruel and shallow!" she shot me a look. "But maybe, once Grassheart gives up, you-"

"No," I said immediately.

"Come on!" Olivenose exclaimed. "He's a good tom!"

"I never said he wasn't a good tom," I replied hotly. "There just isn't an attraction there."

Olivenose huffed and rolled her bright green eyes. "Whatever you say."

We carried on a conversation lazily after that. Nothing interesting, just words to fill the silence. No, it didn't get interesting until Spikefur showed up, a toad clamped between his jaws.

"Hi Dawnpelt," he meowed brightly, after he set the toad down. "Hey Olivenose. Any updates I can pass along to Crowfrost and Rowanstar?"

I shook my head, completely aware of the fact that Olivenose was burning a hole into the side of my head with her gaze. "Nothing about the fox, anyways." I tilted my head. "Is Crowfrost already back at camp?"

Spikefur nodded. "He's the one who sent me."

I hesitated. "I don't suppose you overheard how the apprentices did today?" _StarClan, please say Honeypaw did better!_

Spikefur paused for a moment, as if he recalled a memory, and then said, "Cloverpaw excelled, Hailpaw's still improving, and I think Ivytail said Honeypaw didn't do as horrible as usual."

I exhaled a sigh of relief, and Olivenose chuckled. "That's high praise coming from Ivytail. She used to say the exact same thing about Dawnpelt."

Spikefur looked me in the eye. "I don't believe that," he meowed, softly. "I'm sure Dawnpelt was the best apprentice in the den."

I shifted uncomfortably, while glee sparkled in Olivenose's gaze. Quick to change the subject I quickly asked, "Hey, what's with the toad? Did you go hunting before you came to see us?"

Spikefur's amber eyes brightened. "Yeah, I actually brought it for you."

My heart sank in my chest. _So much for getting the topic off of me._

"That's so sweet of you!" Olivenose purred.

"Yeah," I muttered. "Thanks, Spikefur."

"It's not a problem," he replied, easily. "I thought you guys might be hungry, and I knew you were too faithful to leave your post."

 _Fox, if you ever plan on showing yourself, now would be the perfect time!_

"You should get back to camp," I started. "So that Crowfrost and Rowanstar don't worry. They've been really on edge lately, and the report will sooth them."

When Spikefur's face fell I felt a twinge of guilt. Spikefur was a nice tom, but there just wasn't anything there. At least not on my end. But… I could always use a couple more friends. "How about we go hunting later?" I offered quickly, before I could talk myself out of it. "We can talk more then."

Spikefur's whole face lit up. "Yeah, of course!" he purred. "I'd love to!" He dipped his head, exchanged good-byes with Olivenose, shot me one last smile, and then started back to camp. I watched him go and waited for Olivenose to react.

"Dawnpelt!" she cried in delight.

"There's nothing there," I said quickly. "It's just like with Waspstripe. He's a good tom, and I wouldn't mind being his friend."

Olivenose's eyes sparkled. "Surreee," she drawled, playfully. "You say 'friends' now, but give it a moon or two and then come back to me."

 **Dawn Frost**

Our paws drummed on the frosty ground in harmony, step for step. Crowfrost was only a few mouse-lengths in front of me, and I was determined to not lose sight of him. Sometimes we walked through the forest because it kept me calm, but most nights we ran. Crowfrost said it was easier to distract oneself when they were running. They didn't have time to focus on their fears. In theory it was justifiable, but I still prefered to walk.

"We're almost there!" he called over his shoulder. "Just a little further!"

"I know that, mouse-brain!" I snapped. Panic made me agitated.

After what seemed like seasons we finally reached the bridge-tree. Crowfrost didn't hesitate before scaling the tree and I had to admire how confidently he moved. Maybe he wasn't as sure as a ThunderClan warrior, but he close. And that certainly deserved some sort of respect.

 _Of course, my tree-climbing skills have improved too,_ I thought to myself, as I followed my companion. Not yet as sure as Crowfrost, certainly not as sure as any ThunderClan warrior, but impressively for a ShadowClan cat.

By the time I reached the branch-bridge, Crowfrost was already waiting for me on the other side. "Hurry up, slowpoke!" he called playfully. I narrowed my eyes in response and padded steadily across the shaky branch, and then lept to the other side. Crowfrost nodded, approvingly. "You've really gotten the hang of this," he meowed. If Crowfrost had complimented me a moon ago I would have stared at him like he'd lost his mind, but now I simply dipped my head, as the ghost of a smile played across my lips.

He continued to lead the way to our star-gazing spot. "I'm not as good as you, _yet_ ," I admitted. "Who taught you how to climb so well? It couldn't have been Rowanstar; he hates heights."

"No, it wasn't Rowanstar; it was Whitewing," came his response.

I furrowed my brow. "Let me guess; you spent the night with her too?"

Crowfrost shot me a grin. "Nah, not Whitewing. Me and Smokefoot made a bet with her and Birchfall once, and the losers had to teach the victors one of their skills. They wanted to know how to move so silently in the dark, and we wanted to better our climbing skills." he shrugged. "We won, so they taught us."

I flicked my tail. "So Smokefoot can climb well too?"

The handsome black and white tom nodded. "Yep. He's always been bulkier than me so he had a harder time learning, but I'd say we're the best in ShadowClan." a frown tugged at his lips. "Or, at least, he used to be..."

"Before the accident," I finished.

Crowfrost pulled his lips back into a snarl. "It wasn't an accident," he growled. "A Dark Forest trainee _meant_ to kill him!"

"And thus your hatred for them was formed," I said dryly. "I don't understand how you can-"

"That's not the only reason I hate them," Crowfrost interrupted me. "I mean, it certainly helps fuel the fire, but Smokefoot took the exact same oath I did during our Warrior Ceremony. We both know how dangerous the life of a warrior is. I would hate Dark Forest trainees even if Smokefoot hadn't been injured."

I raised an eyebrow. "Why? Crowfrost, most of them didn't even know what they were training for until the Dark Forest warriors told them, and then they threatened to kill them if they told anyone!"

"Because they were _selfish_ ," Crowfrost snarled. "They didn't warn us because they feared for their lives - it only would have taken one cat to stand up and tell their clan leader what was going on, and then they would have been able to warn the rest of the clans. But no one did because they were too selfish; they didn't want to die. Since when is the life of one cat more important than an entire clan?!"

I growled softly. "So if the Dark Forest came to you and offered to train you, so that you could help your clan, you would have refused their offer?"

Crowfrost shook his head. "That's not my point! My point is that, if I had trained in the Dark Forest, as soon as I figured out what was going on I would have told Blackstar, no matter the consequences." He stopped climbing and turned around to look me in the eye. "My life is not worth an entire clan."

Crowfrost was the last cat I would ever expect to make such a statement. He viewed himself as invincible, others viewed him as a gift from StarClan. And yet here he was, claiming that he wasn't worth something. He was correct, but the fact that he was willing to admit it… it caught me off guard, to say the very least.

My surprise must have registered on my features because Crowfrost shrugged and said, "You can say what you want about me, Dawnpelt, but you can't deny that I'm passionate about ShadowClan. I love what we stand for, I'm proud of our history. I would die in a heartbeat to protect it."

Sincerity gleamed in his frosty-blue orbs and dripped off of his voice. He was telling the truth.

The ShadowClan deputy studied me for a second longer, and then returned his attention to the tree. "That's why I'm treating the Dark Forest trainees differently now," he said, softly. "I value my position in ShadowClan more than I value my feud with them. They almost voted in a new deputy because of my treatment towards them, so I had to change a couple things. They may think I've softened my grudge against them, but it's only hardened." His tone was as cold as ice. "They betrayed ShadowClan, and for that, I'll never be able to forgive them."

And then he continued his climb. I didn't respond - how could I? - and simply followed him. _I'll never be able to tell him,_ I realized. _Not that I ever planned on telling him, but… If he knew that I could have warned Rowanstar, and given us more time to prepare ourselves… but I didn't… I pretended I didn't know anything… Crowfrost would look at me the exact same way he looks at them._

A moon ago the thought wouldn't have bothered me, but now, for reasons I couldn't explain, the idea was devastating.

 **Dawn Frost**

The next couple of nights were less dramatic. The topic of Dark Forest trainees didn't come up again, and we were both in relatively good moods. There were still no fox sightings and Honeypaw was slowly improving, although Owlclaw and Crowfrost decided to continue with their apprentices' training. If they practiced the same battle move for much longer then Cloverpaw and Hailpaw would fall behind in their training. Instead Ivytail would have to train Honeypaw without her siblings, but maybe it was for the best. She would face less distractions that way, and I would continue to help her.

I still wasn't very comfortable in dark, but I noticed improvement in even that. I could stand to lose sight of Crowfrost for a few moments, and I knew the path well enough that even if I did fall behind, I should be able to find the tree. When we finally made it to the tree my heart wasn't beating as rapidly in my chest.

Crowfrost and I scaled the tree easily, made it across the branch-bride, and then continued to climb towards our star-gazing spot. When we finally arrived we sat down, and directed our attention to the glittering stars above our heads.

"I don't think I'll ever get tired of this view," I sighed, blissfully.

Crowfrost hummed in agreement. "Although, I could think of a couple ways to make the experience more memorable."

I shot him a curious glance. "Oh? Do tell."

"We could quit the small talk and find more interesting topics to discuss," he started. "Like… why are you so afraid of the dark?"

I scoffed. "That is your weakest attempt yet." I still hadn't told Crowfrost the reason behind my fear because he still refused to admit that he had a fear.

"Oh, come on Dawnpelt," Crowfrost groaned. "You don't understand, the curiosity is slowly killing me! It's _torture_!" I did understand; I understood completely. The curiosity was killing me as well.

But I shook my head, stubbornly. "I'll tell you my story after you tell me yours."

"But I'm not afraid of anything!"

"That's a lie," I calmly replied, although I was starting to wonder.

Crowfrost huffed, and for a few moments we were both silent. I didn't expect him to suddenly say, "Being alone."

I stared at him. "You're afraid of being alone?" I repeated, slowly, as if I'd heard him wrong.

Crowfrost wouldn't look at me. He kept his frosty blue gaze trained on the starlit sky above. "Yep."

I swallowed, and slowly returned my attention to the sky as well. The wind seemed to blow harder, colder. The sky turned shades darker, the starlight seemed to dim. The atmosphere became something delicate; fragile. As if one wrong word would shatter the moment.

"Why?" Please don't shut me out now.

"Are you sure you want to know?" the ShadowClan deputy asked, his tone as cold as freezing chips of ice. "It's not a happy story by any means."

I nodded, silently. I wasn't going to say the wrong thing and have him draw back.

Crowfrost shrugged. "Fine. But remember, you asked."

"My father was a warrior named Snaketail. He was brash and aggressive, and somehow he and Kinkfur fell for each other. Leaf-bare hit right before I was born, and he caught green-cough and died. Kinkfur was heartbroken, but tried to push on. She gave birth to us nearly a moon later, when there was a shortage of prey. It was a difficult birth and I-..." Crowfrost paused. "There were three of us born. We were all weak and small, but Kinkfur- well, at least they told me, that Kinkfur adored us."

 _"There were three of us born."_ Crowfrost had siblings. "What were their names?" I interrupted him, my voice soft.

He was silent for a moment, and then replied, "Fallowkit and Runningkit. Fallowkit was a she-kit, and Runningkit was a tom."

 _Two toms and a she-kit. Just like me, Tigerheart and Flametail._ A bittersweet smile tugged at my lips. _They could've been like us._

"Anyway, I don't remember Kinkfur ever showing us any affection, but Tallpoppy and Whitewater used to swear it. Maybe if I'd been older I would remember something - her smile, her laugh, a tongue giving me a bath - but… we were so young and it was so cold, there was no prey. After only a few days Fallowkit died of starvation."

I squeezed my eyes shut. I assumed as much, but to hear it outloud was still hard.

"After that it was just me and Runningkit. Prey was still down but with less mouths to feed, Kinkfur thought we might survive. But it only got colder, and we were already so weak… Runningkit died nearly a moon later. He froze to death in his sleep." Crowfrost's tone was near emotionless as he continued. "Kinkfur snapped. She'd lost her mate and two of her kits, and I guess she thought I would be next, and she just couldn't handle anymore death. So a couple days after Runningkit died, she snuck me out of camp, and told me she was going to teach me how to play hide-and-seek. It was moon-high and had been snowing for a couple days, and it was _so cold…_ she told me to hide inside a snowdrift while she went and counted, and then she would come find me. I wasn't more than a moon old but I could tell she was mourning my siblings, and I thought it would make her happy if I played the game, so I didn't protest. I picked a snowdrift and laid there, silent as a mouse, and it kept snowing. I don't know how long I was there, but the snow started to pile up and bury me, and I started crying and calling for Kinkfur, but she never came back.

"Apparently Smokefoot - Smokekit, then - saw Kinkfur take me out and then return without me, and he woke up Whitewater - his mother - and begged her to go find me. She left the nursery to lead a search patrol for me. She found me right before I froze to death and brought me back to camp. She tried to make Kinkfur warm me and feed me, but she refused, and said there was no point because I would only die in the end. So Whitewater took me in and raised me. She'd given birth to Smokefoot and his brother, Forestkit, only a few days before Kinkfur gave birth to us, but Forestkit died almost as soon as he was born. She barely had enough milk to feed Smokefoot, but she treated me like her own son, and Smokefoot treated me like a littermate. Slowly the prey started to return and eventually leaf-bare passed. Everything started to look up after that, but Kinkfur… she never was the same. She refused to acknowledge me after Whitewater adopted me, up until I became an apprentice. She became an elder after that, and would spit and snarl at me whenever it was my turn to take care of the elders." He laughed, humorlessly. "One time I actually asked how any queen could knowingly leave their kit to die, and she just _laughed_ at me."

Crowfrost scowled at the sky. "She's insane; I think she always has been. Otherwise I don't understand how she could… even if I would have died, I don't…" Crowfrost shook his head as he trailed off. "Nevermind. You get the point." he exhaled loudly. "So, there's my beautiful, heart-warming story. I'm afraid of being alone because the one moment I was truly ever alone, I nearly died."

I didn't know how to respond. Crowfrost wasn't the type of cat to ask for pity, and I didn't see any reason to apologize. _At least everything makes sense now,_ I thought. The strange way he acted the other day when he talked about Smokefoot, and when he said, 'he was there for me, even when no one else was'. Smokefoot had convinced his mother to go out and save him, and then he adopted him as a brother. And the reason he and Kinkfur were never close, and why she voted for a new deputy… I was with Crowfrost. I didn't understand how any queen could abandon their kit. It went against everything a mother stood for.

It also explained why he hated leaf-bare and the cold so much. The cold had nearly killed him when he was a kit.

And his fear of being alone. That was why he was so social, and why he was so loud and out-going. Why he used to toy with she-cats, and spend the night with them…

It all made perfect sense.

It hit me that his story also explained why he hated leaf-bare - and the cold in general - so venomously. The cold had nearly killed him. It was this realization that prompt me to lean against Crowfrost to generate warmth between us. Crowfrost looked at me and blinked in surprise, but he didn't comment on our closeness. Instead he leaned into me as well. I'd never been fantastic with words, and I wasn't nearly as social or outgoing as Crowfrost or Olivenose, so I prayed that my contact would tell Crowfrost everything I couldn't put into words.

"Well," he started. "I told you my story, now it's your turn."

I nodded. "Admittedly it's not as tragic as yours-"

"I didn't think it would be," he meowed. "If your fear stemmed from something worse than mine, you'd be pretty messed up."

"Right. Anyway, it's not as tragic but they're… similar. When we were kits, Tigerheart, Flametail and I always wanted to go exploring during the night-time, because it's what we saw all the older cats do. But Tawnypelt would never let us because she knew we would get lost, so one night, Tigerheart suggested we sneak out. Flametail was hesitant, but I…" I trailed off. "I talked him into it." It seemed like I talked Flametail into a lot of regrettable decisions.

"You were for the idea?" Crowfrost asked, more of a remark than a question. "You mean you wanted to go behind Tawnypelt's back?" I wondered if this was Crowfrost trying to distract me or simply get a rise out of me, but I appreciated the attempt either way.

I rolled my hazel eyes. "I wasn't born with good morals. This was… this was actually what made me start to stick so close to the rules. We snuck out while Tawnypelt was asleep and disappeared through the dirt tunnel, so that no one would catch us. At first it was fun and we enjoyed ourselves, but then we heard something rustling in the bushes. We didn't know if it was just the wind, or if it was something dangerous, but it scared us all out of our fur. We started to race back to camp when I tripped over a tree root and hurt my paw. I fell, but Tigerheart and Flametail didn't notice so they kept running. I cried for them to come back but they didn't hear me."

I paused, as the memory replayed itself in my mind. "I finally got to my paws and raced back in the direction I thought they'd ran, but the longer I ran the more lost I became. It was so little, and the forest was so huge, I stumbled over every stick and stone, I got thorns stuck in my paws." I squeezed my eyes shut. "I was in so much pain, everything hurt, and I had no idea where it was. I just kept running and tripping and crying for someone to find me, and eventually I stumbled and fell into a old badger burrow." I flicked an ear, nervously. "I didn't know what badger smelled like so I couldn't determine the scent, but I knew it wasn't cat, and that only scared me even more. I spent ages shouting for help and crying, until I convinced myself that no one would ever find me or miss me.

"Eventually, once the sun had already risen, a patrol found me and brought me back to camp. Tawnypelt grounded the three of us and made us all promise to never sneak out again - not that it was necessary, after that experience I didn't want to leave camp ever again. Littlecloud had to patch me up, and I was so sore and scratched up that I had to stay in his den for a few days." I sighed, almost embarrassed. "It seems stupid now that I think about it, but I haven't been comfortable in the dark ever since."

Crowfrost didn't say anything at first, and I wondered what he was thinking. Was he judging me, was he inwardly mocking me? I felt like ants were crawling all over my body until he finally meowed, "I guess that would be pretty traumatizing."

I exhaled a heavy breath. "Evidently, it would seem so."

Neither of us spoke after that. Not for awhile at least. We just tuned everything out around us, and I tried not to dwell on the fact that Crowfrost's pelt was just as soft and smooth as it looked. I tried not to dwell on the fact that Olivenose would kill for the position we were in, or the moments we'd had.

"Grassheart is trying to make you jealous," I blurted out. I wasn't sure why I did it and I regretted the words almost immediately, but I couldn't take them back.

Crowfrost stared at me for a second, and then blinked. "I know she is."

"You… you do?"

He shrugged. "Well duh. I think everyone's noticed. I mean, she goes from fawning over me one day to completely ignoring me and voting for a new deputy the next? It's so typical." He paused. "Well, everyone except Waspstripe has noticed, anyway. He seems to think she's genuinely interested in him, poor tom."

"Olivenose was worried you might actually go along with Grassheart's plan," I added softly. Might as well be honest.

The black and white tom scoffed, offended. "Of course not. I'm much too intelligent for that!" I snorted, and he shot me a dirty look. " _I am_."

"I never said you weren't," I protested. "So… Olivenose doesn't have anything to worry about?"

Crowfrost didn't reply right away, and I wondered what was going through his mind. Finally he meowed, "I like Olivenose a lot. She was my first apprentice, and I _certainly_ like her more than the one I have now." I chose to ignore that comment. "We have that mentor/apprentice bond, but it's never been more than that, and I doubt it ever will be.

 _It's never been…_ "But you were mates at one point!" I cried, accusingly.

Crowfrost shook his head. "It was more of a fling, actually. We spent a couple nights together, but that was it."

I scowled at him. "Those nights were the best nights of her life! How can you treat them like they don't mean anything to you?"

"Because they _don't_ ," Crowfrost retorted. "Do you fall for every tom who's ever 'loved' you?"

"Of course not, but I don't mate with them either!" I spat. "Besides, we're two totally different cats. You thrive off of their attention, I don't."

"And that's exactly it," Crowfrost suddenly meowed. "I love _their_ _attention_ ; I don't love _them_. So in exchange for their attention, I give them a couple nights." he glanced at me. "It's not nearly as cruel as you think. When I'm done with them they're all like Olivenose; I gave them the best night of their life."

"And then they wind up attached to you, and you dump them," I added bitterly.

Crowfrost shrugged. "It's not my fault I'm so irresistible."

"Why _you-_!"

"You act like I don't give them a choice," Crowfrost interrupted me. "But they know all about me, and they know I have a reputation. Most of the time they approach me first." he shrugged again. "I just give them what they want."

I didn't quit glaring at him. "And that makes you a hero, right?"

"Basically. But if it means anything, I don't do it anymore." A pause. "Well, at least not with cats outside of ShadowClan. Not since I became deputy."

I huffed in annoyance. "Well praise StarClan for that."

Crowfrost grinned, amused, but he didn't respond. Instead he looked up at the stars, and I reluctantly found myself doing the same. Despite our argument I realized that our pelts were still touching - no, more than that, we were practically _snuggling!_ \- and I told myself that the only reason I hadn't pulled away was because I was finally warm. I wondered what his excuse was.

It seemed like moons had passed during our silence. I was okay with that. We'd shared a lot of personal stuff that night, and I was ready to just sit there and gaze at the beautiful display above us. The moon was nearly full, the stars glittered and gleamed. Clouds dusted the sky. The breeze picked up and rustled the hanging vines that enclosed us, and somewhere nearby an owl hooted.

I closed my eyes in bliss and raised my muzzle, and let the breeze glide through my silky pelt. With Crowfrost pressed against me I was still warm enough.

"You know what," Crowfrost suddenly meowed, his voice soft. "You're right; I don't think I'll ever get tired of this view." I simply hummed in response.

Had I opened my eyes, I might have noticed that Crowfrost wasn't looking at the starlit sky, or the moon that practically glowed.

He was looking at me.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **What about this chapter surprised you the most?**

 **#I thought Crowfrost's fear might, but most of you guessed it last chapter. I tried to make the beginning surprising, or Dawnpelt's fear, but I'm sure you guys saw both of those coming from miles away ;)**

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 **THIS CHAPTER THO. It wasn't as easy to write as some of the others because of the lack in humor, but I'm sooo proud of how it turned out! I knew from the very beginning how I wanted it to open up, what conversations to include, the scenery, etc. So, while it wasn't as easy to write when compared to the others, I had a very clear outline in my head and that helped a lot. Plus there are some paragraphs in this that I'm pretty proud of :) I tried to include some fluff as well, to make up for the lack of humor.**

 **In other news... WE SURPASSED 100 REVIEWS :D Guuyyyysssssss I'm so beyond thrilled, you have no idea! Crowfrost and Dawnpelt are two ShadowClan cats who no one has ever paid attention to (well, Dawnpelt has received attention, but the majority of it is negative), and I was so hesitant about starting this story because I didn't think anyone would want to read it... I'm so glad that it's registered with so many of you. Ya'll are perfect.**

 **In celebration of this milestone, everyone who reviews this chapter will be PMed a short, bonus-like scene that won't be included in this fic. I won't say whose POV it's told from, but I can assure you it's neither Crowfrost nor Dawnpelt ;) I'm almost done with it, and I have to say, I really like how it's turned out.**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**

 **~ Katie**


	10. My Name is Crowfrost and I Hate Foxes

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

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 **Chapter Ten - My Name is Crowfrost and I Hate Foxes**

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 **"How can one find the first moment of love? When, in what instant, does the night's dark sky become blue?"** **―Susan Abulhawa**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

"What're you doing?" Smokefoot asked. He was staring at me as if I'd gone insane. I didn't scold him and tell him to change his expression, because it was quite possible that I _was_ going insane.

Nonetheless, I hissed, "Shh! You'll alert her of my presence!"

Smokefoot looked around. "Crowfrost, you're crouched behind the Tall Boulder. Everyone can see you!"

" _Shh_!"

I narrowed my eyes and perked my ears, as I strained to pick up what Dawnpelt was saying. She and Spikefur had just returned from a "walk" together, and I couldn't help but notice that she wasn't scowling, she wasn't glaring, and her tail tip wasn't twitching. She was displaying no signs that the "walk" had been unpleasant.

Spikefur said something and she laughed.

My tail shot up. "Did she just laugh?!" I cried softly in alarm.

Smokefoot was still staring at me, more concerned now than anything. "Uh-huh… is that wrong?"

"Yes, that's wrong! Dawnpelt always returns from these "walks"-"

"Why are you saying "walks" like that?"

"-Because they're not actual, simple walks!" I snapped. "A tom took her out to try and impress her and show-off, and she always returns annoyed and irritated! But this time she's returned cheerful and laughing!"

"And that's… wrong?"

" _Yes_!" Why did Smokefoot not understand?

The dark gray tom frowned, suspicious. "And why, pry tell, do you care if Dawnpelt is annoyed or cheerful?"

The question served as a wake-up call. It dawned on me for a moment, and then I took another moment to observe the position I was in; crouched down behind the Tall Boulder, ears flat and eyes narrowed. I was _spying_ on _Dawnpelt_ for StarClan's sake!

I leapt to my paws and tried to appear nonchalant. "I don't," I meowed.

"You're a liar," Smokefoot retorted. "And a horrible one at that."

I shot the other tom a cool glare. "I'll have you know that I'm a very skilled liar. Why, just the other day I told Dawnpelt a lie and she didn't even blink!" I told her I hadn't met up with any she-cats from the other Clans since I became deputy. She had no idea about my meetings with Shimmerpelt.

Smokefoot rolled his dark blue eyes. "That's not exactly something to brag about," he mumbled.

"The elders have corrupted you," I remarked, sadly. "You used to believe that lying was worthy of bragging." I glanced at Dawnpelt and Spikefur again; they were still conversing, and she still appeared unannoyed. "Hey, how about we grab Scorchfur and take a hunting trip? I need to clear my head."

But much to my disappointment, Smokefoot shook his head. "Sorry Crowfrost, but Littlecloud wants me to stay in camp all day." he sighed, irritated. "The hunting trip we took the other day really messed with my lungs. The cold air isn't good for them."

"Oh." I tried to mask my disappointment well. After all, it wasn't Smokefoot's fault his lungs were damaged. _Nope. It's those StarClan-forsaken Dark Forest trainees_. "Well, don't hurt yourself then. I'm going to-"

"Crowfrost!" a cry interrupted me, and I glanced back just in time to see Cloverpaw come to a screeching halt right in front of me. Hailpaw was trailing close behind her.

I raised an eyebrow. "What's wrong? You look like you just ran to the lake and back."

"It's Honeypaw," she panted. "S-She's gone after the fox!"

The fur along my spine bristled. "She's what?!" I demanded. This had to be some kind of joke. Maybe Dawnpelt was getting back at me for pulling the exact same prank on her, or-or…

Hailpaw was gazing at me with fear in his eyes. Cloverpaw's sides heaved, and her green eyes were wet with unshed tears. This wasn't a joke.

"Why would she do that?" Smokefoot asked, eyes narrowed. "Doesn't she know how dangerous a hungry fox is?"

Cloverpaw shuffled her paws. "It's a long story," she mewed.

I shook my head. "Whatever, that's not important right now. What is important is finding Honeypaw before that fox does!" I spun around and purposely scaled the Tall Boulder, and once I reached the surface, I yowled. Heads shot up to look at me in alarm, and Rowanstar's head poked out of his den.

"Crowfrost, what's the meaning of this?" he demanded. Rowanstar didn't take kindly to others sitting in _his spot_. I could hardly get away with it even when I was organizing patrols.

"It's Honeypaw," I replied grimly, aloud for all to hear. "She's gone after the fox." Several gasps were breathed into the crisp air and panic spread like wildfire.

"Honeypaw?" Pinenose echoed, eyes wide with fear. "W-what? Why would she do that?"

Ratscar pressed against his mate. "Don't worry, we'll bring her back."

"We are going to send out search patrols, aren't we?" Tigerheart demanded.

"Of course we are," Rowanstar said firmly, as he took his place beside me on top of the Tall Boulder. "We'll send out three patrols; one towards the ThunderClan border, one towards the RiverClan border, and another towards the training hollow. Crowfrost and I will both lead one."

"I want to lead the last one," Ratscar spoke up. His dark blue eyes burned with the type of determination that only a father could muster.

"Fine," Rowanstar said with a dip his head. "I'll take Ivytail, Applefur, Tigerheart and Stoatfur. Crowfrost will take Starlingwing, Dawnpelt, Pinenose, and Waspstripe."

"And Ratscar, you'll take Tawnypelt, Owlclaw, Olivenose and Scorchfur," Rowanstar finished. "The rest of you will stay in camp, just in case Honeypaw returns before any of the patrols. After all, no one has seen the fox yet. We could be worrying over nothing."

"We want to come too!" Cloverpaw spoke up. Her eyes were wide with desperation, as were Hailpaw and Ashpaw's.

But Rowanstar shook his head. "The situation is already dangerous enough, I won't risk any more young lives." The apprentices all exchanged looks and for a moment I wondered if they would sneak out of camp after we left to conduct their own search, but I quickly shook off the thought. Only Cloverpaw was that bold, and there would be too many careful eyes still in the camp.

"Alright, ShadowClan," Rowanstar growled. "Move out!"

 **Dawn Frost**

"Please tell me this is just another prank," Dawnpelt murmured, when she appeared by my side.

I shook my head. "Not this time."

Dawnpelt sighed softly. "This is all my fault," she whispered. "I've been helping her train everyday after her time with Ivytail, and instead of helping her again today, I went on a walk with Spikefur. If I hadn't gone with Spikefur she wouldn't have gone after the fox."

I shook my head, even though a large part of me wanted to say that she was right, and she should probably ignore Spikefur for the rest of her life. But I wasn't totally sure why I wanted to say this so badly, and I didn't like the theories I produced at all, so instead I meowed sternly, "You can't blame yourself. Honeypaw has been dying to go after that fox ever since she heard it might be in the territory. She's always been the curious one, it's amazing this didn't happen sooner."

Dawnpelt didn't look convinced. "I shouldn't have gone with Spikefur," she whispered again, but this time I felt like she was saying it for herself, not for me.

"I can't find her scent!" Pinenose wailed from behind the patrol. "She didn't go this way, we need to look somewhere else!"

"If she went in another direction then Rowanstar or Ratscar's patrols will find her," I meowed firmly. "Besides, the fox has been most scented around the training hollow. Even if we don't find Honeypaw there, we might find the fox."

Pinenose tried to argue but Waspstripe was quick to soothe her, and whispered encouragement in her ear. "Don't worry, Pinenose," he murmured. "We'll find her."

I tore my eyes away from the sight and set my gaze on the path ahead, to the training hollow. _Waspstripe's grown into a fantastic warrior,_ I thought. _Even senior warriors like Ivytail and Tawnypelt enjoy being around him. Toadfoot would be proud of him, if only he hadn't died in the Dark Forest battle…_

 _Is that all you ever think about?_ My conscious demanded. _'The Dark Forest battle this', and 'a Dark Forest trainee did this'. I'm sick of listening to your thoughts all the time - think of something else for once!_

 _Hey!_ I snapped. _I never asked for you to invade my mind! It's not like I enjoy your company either!_

I glanced at Dawnpelt, whose face was masked with determination. I wondered if her conscious ever talked to her, and if he was the one who told her Honeypaw's escape was her fault. If her conscious was as big of a jerk as mine was, it wouldn't surprise me.

When the training hollow came into sight I slowed down, and signaled for my patrol to do the same. I parted my jaws and scented the air. My eyes narrowed the same moment Dawnpelt gasped and whispered, "I smell fox!"

"Not just any fox," I added darkly. "Fox- _kits_."

"So then, the fox in our territory is a mother?" Waspstripe asked.

I nodded, grim. "That's what it looks like. Follow me, and we'll see if we can find their den…" I took a couple steps in the direction of the scent, and then paused again to scent the air. A few more steps and then scent the air. It was a steady process until I caught a stronger scent trail, and then we ran in the direction of that.

After a minute Pinenose perked her ears. "I hear them!" she hissed.

I heard them do. Soft barks and whimpers, the shuffle of their paws. "There," I murmured, as I gestured to a hole in the side of a hill. It looked a bit like a rabbit's burrow, and I groaned. "I think they killed my rabbit!"

Dawnpelt rolled her hazel eyes as she shoved past me and peaked into the hole, and then glanced back at us with wide eyes. "There's two of them," she whispered. "And Crowfrost, they're really _young_."

"So a fox gave birth to her kits in our territory," I remarked dryly. "Well, isn't that just our luck?"

"What are we going to do with them?" Waspstripe asked. "I mean…" he shuffled his paws. "We're not… we can't _kill_ them, can we?"

"Absolutely not," Pinenose growled suddenly. "I refuse to kill another mother's kits."

I shot Pinenose a cold look. "Even if their mother has already killed yours?"

"Crowfrost!" Dawnpelt snarled.

"What?" I challenged. "We can't just leave them here! They may be harmless right now, but they won't always be that young. And there's no way their mother will leave without them."

Pinenose shook her head. "I… I _can't_ ," she said. "Even if their mother has already gotten ahold of Honeypaw, I just-" she broke trailed off as a sob shook her shoulders. She lowered her head and continued to cry. "I just c-can't do it! I could never imagine losing one of my kits!"

I looked away from Pinenose and heaved a sigh. As much as I disliked the she-cat, I couldn't force her to do something that went against her motherly nature. I could always kill the two kits by myself, but… something about it just didn't seem _right._

I raised my gaze and caught Dawnpelt's eye. "We could always move them?" she suggested. "Somewhere outside the territory? Their mother would follow their scent to them, and I doubt she would try to move them back."

"Where would we move them to?" Waspstripe asked, as a frown tugged at his lips.

I was silent in thought for a few moments, and then it hit me. "Outside the Eastern territory."

Dawnpelt's eyes lit up. "That's perfect! There's a forest outside the territory, isn't there? No one would bother the foxes that far off."

"Then it looks like we have our plan," I sighed, annoyed. This was _not_ how I planned to spend my day. "Alright, if there are only two kits then that means we can take turns carrying them. Dawnpelt and I will carry them halfway, and then Pinenose and Waspstripe can take a turn. It'll take most of the day to get to the forest and back, so we'll have to be fast if we want to return to camp before moon-high."

 **Dawn Frost**

My name is Crowfrost and I really, _really_ hate foxes.

Why do I hate foxes so passionately, you may ask? There's a large list of reasons why, but I'll focus on the most relevant ones.

One: Foxes reek.

Two: Foxes are heavy.

Three: Fox mothers like to settle in my territory, and give birth to their kits. And then it falls on _my_ shoulders to relocate said kits.

Four: A fox killed the rabbit I'd set my heart on catching. _My. Rabbit_!

So, yeah. It was safe to say that I wasn't on good terms with the fox species at the moment. And yet, I was rescuing a fox's kits so that I wouldn't have to kill them, and I wouldn't have to kill her. It was amazing how backwards it all was, really.

The fox-kit swung from my jaws and flailed his paws miserably, but he was too weak to present a real challenge. ShadowClan had enough trouble hunting prey in leaf-bare, and we were feeding an entire clan. I doubted the kits' mother could hardly find enough prey to feed herself, much less her children.

At least the fox I was carrying didn't make much noise. Dawnpelt got stuck with the vocal one.

The tiny fox let out a shrill, indignant mew, and I shot Dawnpelt a side-glare. "Make that thing shut-up!" I spat through gritted teeth.

Dawnpelt returned my glare. Clearly her 'precious' package was annoying her as well. "And how am I supposed to do that?" she demanded, teeth still clamped onto the kit's scruff. It let out another sharp mewl, and I lowered my cold gaze.

"You know… it's not too late to kill them."

"Crowfrost!" Pinenose snapped.

"Kidding!" Oh, wait, no. No I wasn't.

 **Dawn Frost**

The cold wind continued to blast us in the face as we made our way towards the forest. The fox-kit in my jaws had stopped fighting me so much, and now is simply hung in the air and shivered. I felt a brief twinge of sympathy for the tiny fox; it still had kit-fur, and was surrounded by unfamiliar scents. It must have been miserable.

"I feel kind of bad for them," Dawnpelt muttered, as if she'd read my thoughts. "I bet they're terrified."

I shrugged. "They wouldn't be if their mother hadn't settled in our territory."

Dawnpelt went to reply, but she stopped when a series of white flakes started to fall in front of our eyes. A cold flake landed on my muzzle and I dropped the fox-kit so that I could groan. "Are you serious?" I demanded. "It's _snowing_?" I _hated_ the snow!

Pinenose appeared at my side and picked the fox-kit up again. "Waspstripe, take Dawnpelt's kit," she ordered, around the scruff in her mouth. "We'll carry them the rest of the way." The ginger and brown tom complied, and took the fox-kit that Dawnpelt had been carrying. She didn't protest.

"Alright," I sighed. "Let's get moving again."

Pinenose and Waspstripe resumed lead, and I fell back to walk beside Dawnpelt. "I hate foxes, and I hate the snow," I grumbled. "What in the name of StarClan did I do to deserve this?"

"Do you want a list?"

I shot the gorgeous she-cat a hard look, and she laughed quietly. Then, as a sort of apology, she pressed her body against my side, almost instantly warming me. "Apology accepted," I told her.

Dawnpelt had loosened up about touches, I'd noticed. She used to snap at anyone who so much as brushed pelts with her, but now she could tolerate it. Unless of course it was an unwanted tom, but after she rejected nearly every tom in the clan she didn't face that problem as often as she used to. _I wonder if she brushed pelts with Spikefur on their "walk"._

And then I wondered why I care.

 **Dawn Frost**

"This looks like the place," I meowed, as I observed our surroundings. We were no longer in ShadowClan territory, instead we stood in a forest-y clearing. I would have suggested that we claim the forest to Rowanstar, but it was too full of undergrowth and brush. It was more of a ThunderClan forest.

 _Still,_ I thought. _It's nice to know it's here._

"So, where should we set them?" Waspstripe asked, as his eyes flitted around the clearing.

"We can't just set them down," Pinenose added. "We need to find a den or burrow…"

I was actually okay with just setting the little pests down and darting back to camp, but I figured that no one else would go along with my plan. "Alright," I meowed. "Spread out and look for a suitable den."

The search didn't last very long, thank StarClan. A few minutes later and Waspstripe announced that he found an old badger set.

"Are you sure we should leave them here?" Pinenose fretted. "What if their mother can't smell them over the scent of badger, or what if they escape?"

"That's not our problem," I said darkly. "We carried them to safety, we can't linger around to make sure their mother shows up." When Pinenose looked ready to protest I went on, "Besides, surely one of the patrols have found something by now. Don't you want to get back to camp and check on Honeypaw?"

Pinenose clamped her jaws shut, but Dawnpelt and Waspstripe didn't look as convinced.

"Look," I started, exasperated. "The den is full of moss, it's not like they're going to freeze death, and we're _not_ staying around here any longer to hunt for them. So _come on._ "

My patrol members exchanged glances, and I was amazed that they were all so concerned for these fox-kits' lives. _Sure, maybe they're cute now, but… don't they realize that they're going to grow up? Foxes are our enemies!_

I couldn't help but growl lowly when I said, "Let's go, we need to get back to camp."

 **Dawn Frost**

I always thought that, as the Clan deputy, whenever I entered the camp my Clanmates should stop what they were doing to cheer for me and welcome me back. They never did and I couldn't help but feel a tad disappointed whenever they didn't, but now, as everyone stopped speaking to turn and stare at me, I wondered if maybe there was a reason why no one ever did.

It was _awkward._

Of course it might be considerably less awkward if they weren't all so miserable looking.

"Uhm," I started, unsure, "Did I miss something?"

Pinenose took a couple steps forward as she scanned the camp. "Where's Honeypaw?" she demanded. "Did you find her?"

When no one answered us my heart started to sink in my chest. _Oh no…_

"Where is she?" Pinenose asked again, panic evident in her tone. Several cats developed a sudden interest in the snow, as if it was the most fascinating thing in the world, while others refused to look anywhere near the panicked mother.

Suddenly Rowanstar padded out of the medicine cat den with Littlecloud in tow. They were speaking to each other in hushed whispers, but they both stopped when they laid eyes on us. "You're back," Littlecloud remarked, as if surprised.

"It's about time," Rowanstar growled. "You've been gone for ages! Where were you?"

"It's a long story," I meowed. "I'll explain everything in a moment, but first, where's Honeypaw?"

Rowanstar's expression softened, as his gaze flitted towards Pinenose. "We found her," he started hesitantly. "But… the fox found her first."

Dawnpelt gasped from behind me. Pinenose nearly collapsed as she stumbled forward. "She's not dead, is she?" the sleek black she-cat asked. "Please Rowanstar, tell me she's not dead!"

It was Littlecloud who answered her. "No, she isn't dead, but-" a horrible bout of coughing cut him off. Rowanstar laid his tail on his friend's spine before he turned back to Pinenose.

"She's not dead, but she's in critical condition. I'm sure she put up a good fight, but the fox was vicious. By the time we found her she was in a pool of her own blood, unconscious. It won't be an easy recovery by any means, and I-" Rowanstar paused before he shook his head, as if he changed his mind. "Ratscar and your kits are still in the medicine cat den with her, if you'd like to see her."

Pinenose nodded fervently, and brushed past her Clan leader as she made her way towards the medicine cat den. I wondered if she regretted saving those fox-kits now.

"Poor Honeypaw," Dawnpelt murmured. "I can't-... I can't believe it."

"Neither can we," Rowanstar remarked. "It's terrible, but we're doing all we can to help her."

"Did you ever find the fox?" Waspstripe asked.

Rowanstar growled lowly. "No, we didn't. Ratscar's patrol came back with no reports, and my patrol found Honeypaw. I assume your patrol found the fox, and chased it off?"

I hesitated, "Not quite. Could we talk about this in your den?"

 **Dawn Frost**

Rowanstar wasn't as creditable as an actor as yours truly, but he had his shining moments. At the moment I couldn't tell if he was impressed with my fox rescue, or livid.

Apparently Dawnpelt could read her father better than I could. "You're taking this better than I thought you would," she remarked. I glanced at her and then returned my attention back to Rowanstar. Funny, I'd been leaning more towards 'livid' than 'impressed'.

Rowanstar narrowed his amber eyes. "This isn't a joke, Dawnpelt. Messing with a fox's kits is dangerous. You might as well be begging StarClan to strike you lightning."

He certainly looked livid, in a cool and collected sort of way. I wondered if Dawnpelt expected him to snarl and hiss, or if she'd read him wrong. It occurred to me that she could have meant the remark sarcastically, but… _Dawnpelt,_ making a sarcastic remark to her Clan leader/father? Practically unheard of, although they were known to have their fair share of arguments. Dawnpelt always had been stubborn.

The creamy-colored she-cat snorted softly and lowered her hazel gaze to her paws. I raised an eyebrow and looked back to Rowanstar. "What would you have had us do?" I inquired, not rudely. Best to tread softly when standing on thin ice.

The large ginger tabby tom exhaled. "I'm not sure," he admitted. "I agree, killing the kits wasn't the answer. It would have angered their mother even more. But, given time, we could have come to a different solution."

"We didn't have time," Dawnpelt argued. _My thoughts exactly._

Rowanstar scowled and opened his jaws to speak, when a sudden yowl interrupted him. Without waiting for orders Dawnpelt and I jumped to our paws and darted out of the den, and a heart-beat later Rowanstar was following us. The large ginger tom shoved past us and sprinted atop the Tall Boulder, where he then demanded, "What's wrong?"

Just then Ratscar and Ferretclaw burst into the camp, and Ratscar started to call, "The fox is-" but he never got the chance to finish his warning. The fox appeared in the camp entrance, spitting and snarling, and then chaos exploded.

"She's looking for her kits!" Dawnpelt cried.

Inwardly I was cursing. _I knew it, I knew I shouldn't have agreed to take those kits away! Ugh, StarClan, I should have left them alone!_

 _There's no time for sulking,_ my conscious snapped. _There's a very angry mother fox in your camp!_

"Guard the nursery!" Rowanstar commanded, and several warriors moved quickly to carry out his order. I noticed Hailpaw and Cloverpaw among them, but didn't call the apprentices back. If they wanted to partake in the action then let them. I was tired of holding them back and having them rebel.

Warrior after warrior threw themselves at the fox, but she side-stepped their claws and dodged their blows surprisingly easy. I narrowed my eyes and let out a caterwaul, raced towards the fox, and then leapt.

 _What are you doing?!_ My conscious screeched.

I didn't retort. Instead I unsheathed my claws and landed squarely on the fox's back. She snarled and turned around to try and snap at me, but she couldn't do so without completely ignoring the warriors that still batted her muzzle and ears.

She started to buck and snap at my paws again, and I thought, _I have to get her out of this camp! It's too dangerous to continue like this!_

But that was my last thought before she bucked one more time, unsettled my balance and threw me into the Tall Boulder.

" _Crowfrost_!" I heard a voice screech, but my mind was too foggy to distinguish it.

For a minute I thought I was going unconscious. Black spots danced before my eyes and my head ached. The voices in the background started to sound fuzzy and muted. I let out a pain-filled groan and laid my head down. _Just a short nap,_ I thought, _I just need to close my eyes for a few moments…_

And then I heard another voice rise above the chaos in camp and the confusion in my mind, and it shouted, "It's in the medicine cat den!"

My eyes snapped opened. _Honeypaw is still in there!_

My nap could wait. I struggled to stand to my paws and then stumbled towards the den. I was nearly knocked down several times and black splotches still invaded my vision, but I finally managed to reach the den. My vision was blurry and I couldn't make out what the fox was doing; she could have been shuffling through wilted herbs as she searched for her kits, or she could have been hovering over Honeypaw, poised to kill.

I heard a voice cry out, and decided to go with the latter option.

"Hey!" I shouted, as loudly as I could. I could just make out the fox's movement; she spun around to look at me. "Mange-pelt," I growled, "Why don't you pick on somebody your own size?"

I was in no position to fight, but on the other paw, I wasn't in the position to do much of anything. My brain wasn't fully functioning (my conscious even shut-up), so maybe my plan of action wasn't the best one.

I turned around and ran.

I bowled over several warriors as I raced out of the camp. The sound of pawsteps told me that my plan was working; the fox was following me. She was leaving the camp.

As I sped through the pine forest I wondered, _Where am I supposed to go, again?_ I stumbled a few times as I tried to run and remember at the same time; at the moment I could only focus on running or on my plan. I was in no condition to do both. The still-falling snow also wasn't helping my blurry eyesight.

 _The Eastern Forest!_ Realization hit me like lightning. I had to get to the Eastern Forest! I couldn't remember why that was so important - StarClan, for a second I forgot why I was even running in the first place, until the fox's snarl jolted my memory - but 'why' didn't matter right now. At the moment, the only thing that mattered was getting away from this fox. If the Eastern Forest could somehow help me, then I would go there.

I pumped my legs as hard as I could but despite my best efforts, I was still slowing down. I was running and planning and fighting off a concussion; it was safe to say that I wasn't in great condition.

I heard the snap of jaws right behind my head. I gritted my teeth and forced myself to speed up. _I can't let her catch up to me,_ I thought, _If I do she'll kill me!_

That thought was enough to motivate me for a few more minutes, and just when I started to draw ahead of the fox, disaster struck. The snow had managed to completely hide a large stone, and my brain was already so foggy… I didn't even notice the out-of-place lump of snow until after I tripped over it and fell on my face.

A heartbeat later and there was a fox hovering over my head. She snarled and drool splattered on my face. My paws were all sore and ached something fierce. The paw that got caught on the stone had started to bleed. _Well, this is it._

"Fine," I groaned. "Go ahead and kill me. But make it q-quick, will you? I-I _h-hate_ the snow!"

I let my eyelids close and allowed my senses to dull. Maybe if I fell unconscious quick enough I wouldn't feel my throat being ripped out.

As my mind started to drift into uncharted territory, I vaguely realized that someone was yowling fiercely, and that the fox was taking her sweet time with my death.

I heard a snarl.

" _Crowfrost_!"

And then there was nothing.

 **Dawn Frost**

In all honesty, I didn't expect to ever wake up again.

Maybe that was just because I was dramatic, but I thought that fox was going to kill me once I fell unconscious. Nonetheless, I did not die. As a matter of fact I woke up a few hours after I passed out.

I still had a splitting headache, and I groaned loudly. "What happened?"

Several voices cried my name in relief, and before I knew what was happening I was attacked by something rough and wet. A tongue, I realized. I wasn't sure who the owner of said tongue was, but I was too groggy to really care.

"That's enough, Dawnpelt," a voice meowed. It took me a second to think about the statement, and then I realized that Dawnpelt had been licking my face. Then it took me another second to wonder why that confused me.

As my vision started to adjust, I reorganized the cats who'd all exclaimed when I woke up: Rowanstar, Tawnypelt, Smokefoot, Scorchfur, Ivytail, and of course, Dawnpelt. I noticed Ratscar sat beside Rowanstar as well, but I doubted he was relieved when I woke up.

I also noted that we were all gathered inside Rowanstar's den. _Huh._

"How do you feel?" Scorchfur asked, hope agleam in his eyes.

I let my head fall back down and I closed my eyes again. "My head hurts something fierce, and my paws ache, but other than that…"

"What you did was very dangerous, Crowfrost," Rowanstar meowed sternly. "You could have died!"

"To tell you the truth, I honestly thought I was going to."

My humor went unappreciated by the group of warriors, except for Smokefoot, who snorted.

"What happened to the fox?" I groaned again. "If I'm alive, I assume something happened?"

"Dawnpelt went after you," Tawnypelt answered me. "She was a few fox-lengths behind you the entire time. When you tripped and the fox stood over you, she distracted it, and led it to the Eastern Forest."

"I reunited her with her kits," Dawnpelt added. "Once she noticed them inside that old badger set, she completely forgot about me. By the time I got back to you, Ratscar and Scorchfur were already hauling you back to camp."

I blinked in surprise and glanced at Ratscar. "You carried me back here?"

The brown tom rolled his eyes. "I didn't want to, but Cloverpaw said that if _I_ didn't go after you, _she_ would."

 _Well then. I never thought I'd think this, but thank StarClan for Cloverpaw._

"I helped too," Scorchfur added, indignantly, but Smokefoot shushed him.

"So why am I in here?" I asked.

"I wanted a meeting with my most senior warriors," Rowanstar replied. "I'd only called for Tawnypelt, Ivytail and Ratscar, but these three," he gestured dryly towards Dawnpelt, Smokefoot and Scorchfur, "refused to leave your side."

I frowned. "No, I mean why am I in _here_? Why am I not in the medicine cat den with Littlecloud?" I snorted, and then added, "Did you call this meeting to decide if I was worth the herbs?"

The group of warriors fell silent, as they all exchanged glances with each other. Caught off guard I quickly meowed, "Guys, that was just a joke. Please tell me that's not the reason you-"

"Littlecloud is dead," Ivytail interrupted me. "The fox killed him."

My pale blue eyes widened. "T-The fox-? But whe-when…" I trailed off as I racked my memories. Suddenly I remembered standing outside the medicine cat den, unsteady on my paws, when a cry breached my hearing. I thought it was Honeypaw crying out in fear, but then it dawned on me…

 _Oh StarClan,_ I thought, as I squeezed my eyes shut. Littlecloud had been killed right in front of my eyes and I didn't even realize it. _I could have saved him. I could have gotten to the den faster, I could have-_

"There was nothing you could have done, Crowfrost," Tawnypelt meowed, solemnly. "Littlecloud was ill and elderly. It was his time to join StarClan."

There was logic behind her words, although they offered me little comfort. Suddenly I understood why Dawnpelt blamed herself for Honeypaw's encounter with the fox.

"So then a fox killed our only medicine cat," I meowed, slowly. That was just our luck, wasn't it? _Great StarClan, I **hate** foxes!_ "What are we going to do?" We weren't even a moon into leaf-bare yet, and Honeypaw was in critical condition. If there was ever a time for a medicine cat…

"That's why I called this meeting," Rowanstar explained. "To discuss our next course of action. We cannot be without a medicine cat; not right now."

Ratscar looked at Smokefoot. "What about you, Smokefoot?" he asked. "You're young enough to learn their ways." Smokefoot looked horrified by the suggestion and I couldn't say I blamed him. Retired or not, if someone asked me to train as a medicine cat I'd laugh in their face.

Rowanstar beat Smokefoot to the response. "No, Smokefoot has never shown desire in healing. This needs to be a cat who _wants_ to learn their ways."

Ivytail scoffed. "We don't have time for such a cat to be born, Rowanstar!"

"What about Ashpaw?" Scorchfur suggested. "She's compassionate, she would make a fantastic medicine cat!" I doubted Hailpaw would be thrilled by the statement.

I also found it amusing that the three warriors not selected to participate in the meeting were chiming in with their own opinions.

Tawnypelt shook her head. "It takes more than just compassion to train as a medicine cat. Besides, I know how badly Ashpaw wants to be a warrior. She'd never switch apprenticeships willingly."

It was Dawnpelt who said, "Honeypaw."

I blinked. Well, _there_ was an intelligent suggestion. "Honeypaw would be perfect for the role," I commented. "She's sweet-natured, compassionate, plus she's shaping up to be an absolutely lousy warrior."

Ratscar shot me a cold glare.

Murmurs of agreement were breathed into the air, until Ivytail growled and shook her head. "No, Honeypaw needs to complete her warrior training so that she doesn't resent herself for going after that fox."

"She's shown an interest in healing," Scorchfur argued. "I've seen her go over herbs with Littlecloud. She even helped him examine Snowbird the other day."

"That's just because she's curious!" Ivytail protested. I narrowed my eyes; it was no secret that Ivytail was a prideful warrior. If word got around that her apprentice decided she didn't want to be a warrior anymore, and started to train as a medicine cat… I wondered if maybe this was her pride lashing out.

Rowanstar raised his tail for silence. "That's enough," he meowed firmly. "After Honeypaw's encounter with the fox, Littlecloud said-" he paused to swallow, and I noticed that the other warriors flinched as well. We were going to have to get used to Littlecloud's absence. "Littlecloud said that Honeypaw suffered a lot of trauma, and he thought it would take her moons to return to her training. If Honeypaw wants to train as a medicine cat, I certainly won't deny her the position."

"And if she wants to continue her warrior training?" Ivytail challenged.

Rowanstar met her challenge easily, looked her in the eye and said, "Then she will be allowed to. Ultimately the choice will be Honeypaw's, and hers alone."

Ivytail dipped her head in response, although I noted that she was gritting her teeth together.

"If Honeypaw does decide to train as a medicine cat apprentice," Dawnpelt started, "then she's going to need a mentor. And if she doesn't… well, none of us are qualified to treat the wounds she has now, and someone should probably keep an eye on Crowfrost."

"Hey!" I protested. "I'm just fine!" To emphasis my point I stood to my paws, and instantly regretted my decision a heartbeat later when I staggered and the black spots returned to my vision.

Smokefoot rolled his dark blue eyes and shoved me back into my makeshift nest. "Don't hurt yourself, Show-off."

I shot him a glare that didn't have an ounce of venom behind it, and then glanced back at Rowanstar. "ThunderClan, RiverClan, and WindClan all have a full-time medicine cat and an apprentice, and ThunderClan and RiverClan both have two full-fledged medicine cats. They'll have to send us one of their medicine cats until we have someone else trained."

"I think that's best option," Tawnypelt added.

Ratscar looked past me, outside the lip of the den, where the moon was shining brilliantly in the sky. "The next Gathering is tomorrow," he remarked. "I don't want to wait that long for someone to treat Honeypaw's wounds, but if we have too…"

Rowanstar laid his tail on the other tom's back. "She'll be okay until tomorrow night," he promised. "I'll have someone keep a constant eye on her. And then, during ShadowClan's report, I'll ask the other leaders to send us one of their medicine cats."

"And if none of the other medicine cats step up?" Scorchfur inquired.

Rowanstar's eyes hardened, and a certain kind of gleam appeared in them. "They will," he said, simply and with conviction. I sensed an unspoken threat behind those eyes, and was reminded of ShadowClan's reputation. We were the dark hearts of the four Clans, and although Rowanstar wasn't nearly as bloodthirsty or battlehungry as some of our past leaders, he certainly didn't go against the stereotype.

That was fine. I had no problem with our reputation. It only sparked fear and doubt into our enemies' minds when the time came to face each other on a battlefield.

The conversation carried on and I listened as intently as I could, and added in my own thoughts when I saw fit. Eventually I felt someone settled beside me. I glanced up and expected Smokefoot or Scorchfur, but came face to face with Dawnpelt.

"Hey," she whispered.

"Hey," I whispered in return. I wasn't sure why we were whispering but I didn't question it. My head still ached and the soft tones of her voice were a welcome change from the main discussion.

She didn't speak again for a moment, so we simply looked at each other. Her hazel eyes glowed in the moonlight, luminous and captivating and completely focused on me. Not Rowanstar, not Tigerheart, and not Spikefur. _Me_.

"I'm glad you're okay," she finally meowed.

"The feeling is mutual," I replied softly.

She cracked a small smile and rasped her tongue over my ears once. I allowed my eyes to flutter for just a second, and then pretended the action had no effect on me. I returned my attention towards the main discussion, and forced myself to participate, even though I no longer had the desire to.

 _If I go unconscious again, do you think she'll lick me again?_ I wondered, because I was pretty sure that if I stood up quick enough, I could make myself blackout. Or at the very least I could always go find that fox again, and see if she was up for round two.

My conscious replied, _It's couldn't hurt._

Oh no, it would hurt; that much I was sure of. After all a concussion was no small thing, and thus far the after effects were pretty miserable too.

But I had a feeling... it might be worth it.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **What would you like to happen during the next Gathering?**

 **#Give me a suggestion and I just might include it!**

* * *

 **I should have known something was wrong when the last chapter was so easy to write! Ugh, I didn't enjoy writing this chapter at all. I don't like the beginning, I don't like the fox-kit rescue, I don't like how the fox burst into the camp... ugh. Then there's the ending to this chapter. I actually had a few more paragraphs added in, but I couldn't seem to make them flow with the rest of the chapter, so I deleted them. That's why the ending is a bit abrupt, but I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter nonetheless. As for Littlecloud's death... I've always known that I would kill off Littlecloud. He's been around since the first arc, it was just his time to go. And he died bravely, trying to defend Honeypaw. And now there's drama with finding a replacement medicine cat! I'm sure who all know who's coming to live in ShadowClan for awhile ;)**

 ***** PLEASE READ THIS!**

 **^ So! Recently I've discovered a very talented Warriors author by the name of Hissing Willows. I discovered her through her amazing fic: 'Blazing: Book One: Into the Wild'. It's the entire first arc re-written with a twist: what if Bluestar never gave up her kits, Thistlestar became leader, and Rusty joined RiverClan? It's an absolutely fantastic fic, which I now proudly beta. A lot of you PM me with fic recommendations, and in an archive full of poorly-written parodies and troll-fics, I finally have a fic I feel confident in recommending to you! I have a link to the story and Hissing Willow's account on my profile :)**

 **^^ Also, I have a contest going on in my poll! More information on that is also on my profile, so check that out as well!**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	11. In Denial is My Favorite Place to Be

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

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 **Chapter Eleven -** **In Denial is My Favorite Place to Be**

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 **"** **I don't like the way he's looking at you.** **I'm starting to think you want him too** **." - Jealous, Nick Jonas**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

"How is she?"

I glanced back to meet Olivenose's bright green gaze, and then turned around to focus on Honeypaw again. The golden tabby she-cat was curled up in her mossy nest, fast asleep. I ran my tail gently over her back, and flinched every time I glazed over one of newly acquired her scars. _She's only been training for a moon. She shouldn't have so many scars._

"She's better than she was last night," I finally replied. "Her breathing rate is normal again, but that's all. She needs a medicine cat to watch over her, not an average warrior."

"Hey now, you're an above-average warrior _at least,_ " Olivenose purred playfully, as she nudged my shoulder. I shot her a weak smile that only held up for a heartbeat, and then my face fell again when Honeypaw moaned softly. "Don't worry," Olivenose meowed, her voice full of determination. "She'll have a medicine cat to watch over her by the end of the night."

 _If a medicine cat agrees to the position,_ I thought dryly.

The tortoiseshell she-cat stood to her paws and gestured for me to follow her. "Come on," she said. "Rowanstar will announce the Gathering list soon, and I want good seats."

A frown tugged at my lips. "But Honeypaw-"

"She'll be fine," Olivenose interrupted me. "Cloverpaw volunteered to stay behind tonight to keep an eye on her."

I blinked, caught off guard. "Really?" I asked, even as I stood to my paws to follow the green-eyed she-cat out of the small den. "Are you sure it was _Cloverpaw_ that volunteered?"

Olivenose nodded. "Uh-huh. Owlclaw told me."

We were the first cats to take our places in front of the Tall Boulder. A sly smirk played across my lips and I asked, "Owlclaw, huh? Are you _sure_ there's nothing between you two?"

Olivenose hesitated. "Well… _he_ likes _me_ , but the feeling isn't mutual." My disapproval must have shown on my face because she groaned and went on. "Owlclaw is a great tom, sure. He's handsome, intelligent, sweet-"

"Don't forget charming, funny, and _not a jerk_ ," I interjected helpfully.

" _Right_ ," Olivenose drawled. "So he's got a lot going for him. I admit that. But you can't force an attraction that _just isn't there_ , Dawnpelt."

"But Olivenose," I pressed, "You're not even giving him a chance! Who knows? Maybe if you put forth the effort you would-"

"Could you see yourself with Crowfrost?"

I stopped and stared at my best friend. " _Excuse_ _me_?"

Olivenose didn't back down. She looked me in the eye and said, "Me giving Owlclaw a chance would be like you giving Crowfrost a chance. So, could you see yourself with Crowfrost?"

 _Oh StarClan._ No, no I didn't like where this was going at all!

The answer should have been simple: no. No one could picture Crowfrost and I together; not after seasons of petty low-blows and more arguments than anyone could count. It already amazed the Clan that we managed to form a friendship. If we became mates, it wouldn't surprise me if a couple cats died from the shock.

 _But…_

I hated to admit it, but Crowfrost… I wasn't sure how I felt about him anymore. I thought I despised him, but then he wanted to form a truce of sorts and test a friendship. Then I thought we were friends - not best friends, not close friends, _friends_ \- and then he made it his personal goal to help me get over my fear of the dark. _Who did that?_

We started talking more about our pasts, our hopes and fears and dreams, and our friendship was strengthened. I thought I had it all figured out after that. We were close friends, but still just friends. Nothing more, nothing less.

But then he risked his life to save the Clan by distracting the fox, despite battling a concussion. That was just… unbelieveable. And when I found him lying on the ground, with the fox hovering over his body, I thought… I thought I'd been too late. And the ache in my chest, in my _heart_ -

That wasn't the kind of ache you feel when a friend dies. That was the kind of ache you feel when someone _special_ to you dies. It was the kind of ache I would feel if one of my parents died, or Tigerheart, or Olivenose.

And I know this, because it was the exact same kind of ache I felt when Flametail died.

And _that_ concerned me.

Crowfrost wasn't like a brother to me. So… a best friend? Had he joined Olivenose's rank when I hadn't been paying attention?

That had to be it. It was the only logical answer, except… except _that_ didn't feel right either. But that meant there was only one other possibly solution, and I refused to entertain the idea. I wasn't in love with Crowfrost. There was simply no way I had feelings for that lizard-brained tom. No way in StarClan.

Olivenose must have taken my silence as confirmation, because she nodded and said, "I didn't think so."

I didn't want to protest and raise suspicion - especially when there was _nothing to be suspicious about_ \- so I chose to keep my jaws shut and my thoughts to myself. It was just as well that our conversation came to an end, because my Clanmates had joined us, and Rowanstar had just scaled the Tall Boulder. He opened his announcement by updating us on Honeypaw's condition, and then going on to say that Littlecloud's death should be kept a secret until he revealed it during his report.

He went on to announce the cats that would be attending the Gathering. "The cats attending the Gathering tonight are: Crowfrost, Ivytail, Ratscar, Olivenose, Tigerheart, Dawnpelt, Spikefur, Stoatfur, Ashpaw, Hailpaw, and Shrewfoot. Make yourselves presentable and then line up at the entrance."

As Rowanstar leapt gracefully onto the ground, Olivenose and I exchanged delighted glances. "Come on," she purred. "Let's go!"

We lined up along with several others who were ready and waiting, and talked about the cats we hoped to see from the other Clans. "Heathertail for sure," Olivenose meowed. "I haven't seen her in ages!"

I nodded. "Definitely Heathertail. I wonder how she's doing with Breezepelt? Last time we spoke, she hadn't made much progress."

Olivenose brushed my concern off with a dismissive wave of her tail. "If there's one she-cat who can make a tom like Breezepelt behave, it's Heathertail. Oh! What about Minnowtail and Graymist, from RiverClan? I hope Graymist and Reedwhisker have become mates by now; it's clear they fancy each other."

I shot my best friend a wicked smirk. "What about Troutstream? Aren't you two close?"

Olivenose was far from amused. "Ha-ha," she deadpanned. "Very funny. I wouldn't care if Troutstream walked off the edge of a cliff." Olivenose and Troutstream despised each other. They considered each other their rival (but when asked, they would deny even being in the same league as each other). I wasn't totally sure what started their rivalry, but I had a feeling it started when Troutstream commented that Olivenose should cut back on the toads.

The tortoiseshell she-cat's expression was one of thought. "You know, I haven't seen Whitewing or Poppyfrost in awhile. I'd like to catch up with them. Oh, and Mousewhisker! I wonder if Ivypool's had their kits yet?"

A stone of dread settled in my stomach when Olivenose moved onto ThunderClan. While ThunderClan and I weren't on good terms, Olivenose had no quarrels with them. Although, it _would_ be nice to catch up with Mousewhisker. "As long as Cherryleaf isn't there," I finally meowed. Olivenose wrinkled her nose and mumbled her agreement.

Just as Rowanstar made his way to the head of the patrol and announced we were about to leave, Spikefur appeared at my shoulder. "Hi Dawnpelt," he meowed, almost shyly. "I was wondering if you would like to walk with me?"

Before I could even _think_ of an excuse to get away from the dark brown tom, Olivenose exclaimed, "She would love to!" I shot the green-eyed she-cat a hard look, to which she responded with a smirk. "I'll walk with Stoatfur. Have fun, you two!" And then she disappeared into the small crowd of cats, and left me alone with Spikefur.

I huffed. _Some best friend she is!_

It wasn't that I disliked Spikefur; really, I didn't! He was just… well, to be blunt, he was a bit boring. Nice to talk to for a minute or so, but after that we ran out of topics to discuss and fell into an awkward silence. But then again, our last walk hadn't been so boring or uncomfortable. It had its moments, but for the most part, I found that I enjoyed Spikefur's company.

Maybe we were moving past the awkward phase?

 **Dawn Frost**

Spikefur, while he wasn't exactly exciting, definitely had his redeeming qualities. When we went on that walk (the day the fox attacked Honeypaw), I appreciated how polite and respectful he was. The walk was clearly an attempt to woo me, but he never crossed any boundaries. Our pelts only brushed once and it was because he tripped; he didn't try to twine our tails, or talk about a shared future. I was actually able to pretend it wasn't an attempt to court me, and pretend it was just a walk with a friend.

Because that's all Spikefur was. A friend.

No matter how much Olivenose said otherwise.

Anyway, the walk to the Gathering island was pleasant. Spikefur told me about the time he and Grassheart were apprentices, and tried to cross the RiverClan border, but Spikefur ruined their plans when he tripped and fell into a stream. The stream wasn't very deep, but he was soaking wet and embarrassed.

I laughed, and Spikefur grinned sheepishly. "I'm not exactly coordinated," he admitted. "Grassheart always used to tease me because I would trip over my own paws."

"I can't believe you're siblings," I meowed. "You're so different!"

The dark brown tom shot me a knowing look. "Because you think she's an irritating fox-heart?"

I swallowed thickly and didn't respond.

"It's okay, I'm not offended or anything," he said. "I know how Grassheart can be. But she's nice once you get to know her."

I scoffed. "Excuse me if I'm doubtful."

"You're excused," Spikefur meowed pleasantly. I didn't reply and he didn't try to change the topic. We fell into an uncomfortable silence, and inwardly I sighed. _And just when I thought we were done with this phase…_ I wouldn't mind the silence so much if it didn't feel so awkward! I could just walk beside Tigerheart or Olivenose and not say a word, and feel perfectly content!

I nearly groaned when I realized that the same could be said for Crowfrost.

Speak of the devil.

"Hey," he meowed brightly, as he shoved his way between Spikefur and I. I yelped in surprise and shot the (admittedly handsome) tom a hard look.

"What _are_ you doing? Shouldn't you be up front with Rowanstar?" I demanded.

Crowfrost smirked. "I missed you too, Sweetheart." I glowered at the nickname. I'd told him to quit calling me that, why did he insist on using it? He glanced at Spikefur and I noted that some of the enthusiasm died in his pale blue eyes. "Oh. Hi, Spikefur."

My lips tightened into a frown. Clearly Crowfrost was just trying to make the other tom feel unwelcomed, and I had no idea why. Spikefur hadn't trained in the Dark Forest!

I was even more surprised when Spikefur responded by dipping his head and meowing cooly, "Crowfrost." Spikefur was such a respectful, easy-going tom! But then again, I supposed Spikefur's response could be contributed to the fact that he fancied me, and probably wasn't thrilled that the handsome deputy had interrupted us. But that still didn't excuse his behavior, or Crowfrost's for that matter!

With one last disdainful look towards Spikefur ( _rude!_ ) Crowfrost directed his attention towards me. Smug smirk back in place he teasingly asked, "So, are you going to make me save your life again tonight?"

I blinked, momentarily confused until I remembered my accident at the last Gathering. My ears grew hot and I sheepishly ducked my head, which prompt Crowfrost to laugh. My heart did a flip inside my chest, and I resisted the urge to scowl. _Quit that,_ I thought sternly. _His laughter should_ _ **not**_ _affect you!_

"Just wondering if you planned on giving me a warning," Crowfrost hummed, and when our gazes met he winked. I huffed, rolled my eyes, and then made a point to not look back at him. On one paw I was relieved Crowfrost had shown up and saved Spikefur and I from an awkward silence; but on the other paw, I felt that familiar twinge of annoyance that tended to appear whenever Crowfrost was involved.

For StarClan's sake, he was the ShadowClan deputy, not a StarClan warrior! There was no reason for him to act so cocky!

 _Even if his attitude_ _ **is**_ _sort of attractive,_ I reluctantly thought. There was no shame in admitting Crowfrost was attractive. Heck, nearly every she-cat agreed that he was the most handsome tom in all the Clans! Crowfrost was _very_ attractive; I just wasn't _attracted to_ _him_.

Once the bridge came into sight Crowfrost excused himself. "Gotta be one of the first on the Island, look important," he explained with a gleam in his blue eyes. I rolled my eyes but allowed a tiny smirk of my own once he disappeared.

"He's not very considerate, is he," Spikefur observed dryly.

I shrugged, as I waited for my turn to cross the bridge. "He has his moments."

"I bet they're few and far inbetween," Spikefur grumbled.

I wasn't sure why the comment bothered me, but before I could pinpoint the reason I'd already shot Spikefur a glare and said, "You'd ought to speak more respectfully of your deputy."

Spikefur's eyes widened slightly. "Dawnpelt, I wasn't trying to-"

But it was my turn to cross the bridge, and I was already starting to feel guilty for snapping at the dark brown warrior. So instead of waiting around to hear an apology I leapt onto the bridge and hurriedly crossed it. When I jumped off on the other side I quickly scented the air, and noted that both WindClan and RiverClan were already present.

I dipped my head and smiled at a couple warriors, but my main priority was to find Olivenose. If I could stick by her side for the rest of the night, she would talk enough for the both of us, especially around cats she knew I didn't like. Thankfully I didn't have to do much searching; I found her and another she-cat already seated in front of the Great Oak.

"Heathertail!" I cried, before I started to weave between cats and make my way to the Great Oak.

The pretty, light brown she-cat was waiting for me with a wicked grin. "Hey you," she started, blue eyes agleam. "Where's your new mate?"

 _My new mate?_ I blinked, confused, until I noticed that Olivenose was also sporting a grin. I flashed her a hard look and demanded, "You told her that I'm mates with Spikefur?"

Olivenose flicked an ear. "I didn't say you were mates, I just told Heathertail that you were held up with a tom."

"She said he's a great match for you," Heathertail added.

I rolled my hazel eyes. "Of course she did," I mumbled dryly. I shook my head and meowed, "Well, we're not mates, and that's not going to change anytime soon. So why don't we talk about a more _realistic_ couple?"

Olivenose's eyes brightened. "Oh, that's right! Heathertail, how are you and Breezepelt?"

Heathertail shrugged, but her widening smirk said otherwise. "There's certainly been progress. He doesn't ignore me anymore, and we can finally get through a conversation without it escalating into an argument. However, that might be because Breezepelt thinks I'm insane."

"He thinks you're insane?" Olivenose repeated, taken back. "Well, that's an… _interesting_ development. Why does he believe this, exactly?"

The blue-eyed she-cat shot me a smirk. "Because I took Dawnpelt's advice."

A frown started to play across my lips. "My advice? What advice did I-" I stopped and gasped. "Heathertail, you didn't!"

Heathertail held herself like a champion, clearly pleased with herself. "I did."

Olivenose looked between us, confused. "Hold on, what advice did you give her?"

"She told me that if Breezepelt didn't come around soon, I should push him into the lake. So I did."

Olivenose looked at me incredulously as I groaned. "I didn't mean for you to take that seriously! It was a joke!"

"It worked, didn't it? He's not ignoring me anymore."

"That's because he's afraid of you," I retorted.

Heathertail shrugged. "Eh, fear, love, what's the difference?"

Olivenose narrowed her eyes. "Maybe you _are_ insane."

Heathertail and Olivenose carried on the conversation, but a new scent distracted me: ThunderClan. They'd finally arrived.

"Where _is_ Breezepelt?" Olivenose inquired, as she straightened her spine to look over the heads of the surrounding warriors. "Did he come tonight?"

Heathertail nodded, unconcerned, as she licked a paw and drew it over her ear. "Uh-huh. He's probably-"

A yowl interrupted the pretty tabby she-cat and a flash of dark brown fur caught my attention; Bramblestar was running towards the Great Oak, hardly pausing to gather his muscles and then propel himself onto the oak with a powerful leap. Several cats murmured to each other, impressed, and I tried be subtle when I rolled my eyes. _Showoff._

Mistystar flashed Bramblestar an amused glance, and he shrugged sheepishly in response. The blue-gray leader stepped forward and started her report. RiverClan were doing well, despite the cold. Their rivers and streams had yet to freeze over, so there was still plenty of prey. Petalnose had also given birth to Mallownose's kits; Echokit, Silverkit, Frogkit, and Tanglekit - two she-kits and two toms.

" _Wow_ ," Olivenose breathed. " _Four kits_! Can you imagine?"

Mistystar concluded her report and then stepped back, and Onestar took her place. He announced that Larkpaw had completed her training, and was now a warrior by the name of Larkflight.

I joined in the traditional chanting, "Larkflight! Larkflight!"

Onestar added that Swallowtail had moved to the nursery, and was expecting Harespring's kits. I peeked past Ivytail's head, and noticed that the WindClan deputy was beaming proudly. Swallowtail's apprentice, Greenpaw, would be trained by Gorsetail until further notice.

Onestar stepped back, and Rowanstar and Bramblestar exchanged glances before Rowanstar gestured for the other leader to go first. Bramblestar stepped forward and announced that Seedpaw and Lilypaw had been made warriors, and were now Seedfrost and Lilybreeze. The Clans chanted again, although I was a bit less enthusiastic.

Bramblestar was in the middle of reporting that a fox had been chased out of their territory roughly a moon ago, when Heathertail nudged my shoulder sharply with her muzzle. I sent the pretty WindClan warrior an annoyed glance, and hissed, "What is it?"

She gestured towards the deputies and murmured, "Crowfrost keeps looking at you."

I followed her gaze until my eyes come to rest on the ShadowClan deputy, whose attention was focused solely on Bramblestar. A frown played across my lips and I opened my mouth to tell Heathertail that she was just seeing things, but stopped when Crowfrost shot me a swift glance. My heart skipped a beat when our eyes locked, hazel and frosty-blue. The air seemed to get colder, and Bramblestar's voice started to dull, until it was just Crowfrost and I.

His eyes were so deep and swirled with a thousands words I couldn't read from so far away, and I resisted the strong urge to stand and move to his side. I could get away with a lot, but sitting with the Clan deputies would be pushing it.

Suddenly Crowfrost grinned and winked at me, and I swear I heard several different she-cats gasp and then swoon. I rolled my eyes and re-directed my attention towards the leaders, and out of the corner of my eye I saw Crowfrost chuckle to himself before doing the same. _Arrogant lizard-brain!_

" _Guys_ ," Olivenose whispered urgently. "I think Crowfrost just _winked at me_!"

I didn't reply and Heathertail only hummed in response, her blue eyes trained solely on me. I pretended not to notice.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

I winked at Dawnpelt, and almost on cue a dozen she-cats gasped and then swooned. Dawnpelt must have heard them as well because she rolled her hazel eyes, and then refused to look at me again. I chuckled before I also returned my attention to the leaders; she was so much fun to rile up!

To my left, Reedwhisker murmured, "Flirting with Dawnpelt right in front of her father? You're a bold one, Crowfrost."

My head snapped up in panic, but I relaxed when I realized that Rowanstar wasn't paying me a bit it attention. I shot a clearly amused Reedwhisker a sheepish grin. "Not _that_ bold."

"So then you and Dawnpelt are mates?" Reedwhisker asked softly. "I was under the impression that you despised each other."

I shook my head. "We're not mates, but we've moved past despising each other. We're… friends. Close friends."

Reedwhisker hummed as a smirk played across his lips. "She's beautiful," he remarked.

 _That's an understatement._ "There's nothing between us, Reedwhisker," I meowed, a bit too forceful.

The sleek black tom shrugged and focused on Bramblestar, who was closing his report. "Whatever you say."

Finally it was Rowanstar's turn. He stepped forward and announced that prey was about as plentiful as could be expected (that is to say, it was scarce), but that ShadowClan was still strong. "The fox that Bramblestar mentioned _did_ cross into our territory," he continued, expression grim. "Yesterday it burst into our camp and wounded several of our warriors. Our deputy, Crowfrost, distracted the fox and led it out of our territory."

"Crowfrost is a hero!"

"He's so brave!"

"And handsome, too!"

"Oh, if only he were a WindClan warrior!"

I shamelessly soaked up the praise (hey, I nearly _died_ trying to distract that fox!), while Brackenfur and Reedwhisker simply grinned to themselves and shook their heads. Harespring, however, scanned the crowd of cats and whispered, "Did my mate just say she wished you were a WindClan warrior?"

I shook my head. "Actually, I think it was Furzepelt."

"But she's Weaselfur's mate!"

"Oops," I shrugged.

Rowanstar continued with his report. "While none of our warriors were seriously injured during the confrontation, our medicine cat, Littlecloud…" he trailed off, but it was enough for the gathered cats to piece together what had happened. Several warriors gasped, and I noticed that the medicine cats all looked incredibly forlorn.

The dark ginger tom went on. "On top of Littlecloud's death, one of our apprentices, Honeypaw, met the fox in the forest and was severely wounded. Her condition is fatal unless she receives medical treatment, which ShadowClan currently cannot offer her." His dark amber eyes swept over the crowd. "Which is why I'm going to ask that one of the medicine cats from the other Clans step forward and reside in ShadowClan until a new apprentice can be trained."

"Reside in ShadowClan until a new apprentice can be trained?" Onestar echoed, incredulously. "But that would take moons! Seasons, even!"

Rowanstar dipped his head. "I understand that I'm asking a lot, but there's no other option. ShadowClan _cannot_ be without a medicine cat, especially not in leaf-bare. And Honeypaw's fate is still murky; if her wounds are not properly treated, she _will_ die."

"That sounds like ShadowClan's problem," Robinwing, a RiverClan tom, declared.

"Why should we be forced to sacrifice one of _our_ medicine cats?" Cherryleaf of ThunderClan (and Dawnpelt's favorite warrior) added. "It's leaf-bare for us too!" Several other warriors voiced their agreement.

I stood to my paws and gazed challengingly at the crowd. "Medicine cats have always followed a different set of rules," I said with authority. "They're allowed to cross borders, and cannot be harmed in battle. They're also _required_ to aid a Clan in need." I looked back at the four leaders. "With all due respect, I feel like this a decision your medicine cats should make."

The gathered cats fell silent, although I noticed that Rowanstar was resisting the urge to grin. Finally WindClan's medicine cat, Kestrelflight, stepped forward. "Crowfrost is right," he meowed. "It's our duty to step up and train a new ShadowClan medicine cat. However, I'm WindClan's only medicine cat, and I can't leave them right now."

Rowanstar dipped his head. "I understand. So that leaves ThunderClan and RiverClan."

Mistystar looked at her medicine cats with understanding in her blue eyes and nodded. "If either of you feel like this is something you need to do, I'll support you."

"The same applies to Leafpool or Jayfeather" Bramblestar added.

The four medicine cats all exchanged glances, and then Leafpool stood up. "I will join ShadowClan," she meowed, determinedly.

A relieved sigh escaped my lips. _Thank StarClan. For a moment I didn't think anyone was going to-_

"No, wait!" I blinked, startled when Leafpool's apprentice, Jayfeather, stood up. " _I_ want to go to ShadowClan!"

My eyes rounded. " _You_?" I cried. Oh, I could think of so many reasons for anyone but Jayfeather to join ShadowClan! He was blind and would have a harder time adjusting to his new surroundings; he was infamous for his lack of patience, something vital in training apprentices; and maybe most importantly, Dawnpelt had accused him of murder and suspended him from his duties!

 _Dawnpelt!_ I glanced swiftly at the she-cat, whose expression was one of poorly masked horror.

Rowanstar appeared taken back, along with Bramblestar and Leafpool. "Jayfeather," Leafpool whispered fiercely. "Are you _sure_ you want to do this?"

But Jayfeather didn't waver; his sightless blue eyes were trained upon the leaders, and he meowed loudly, "I'm sure. This is something I need to do."

Reedwhisker shifted awkwardly at my side; surprised murmurs were breathed into the cold night air. Clearly I wasn't the only one thinking about the bad blood between Jayfeather and Dawnpelt.

Rowanstar and Bramblestar exchanged hesitant glances. "If you mean that, Jayfeather," the ShadowClan leader started, "then ShadowClan will welcome you." I couldn't help but think that "welcome" was a bit of an extreme word.

The four leaders all glanced at each other, and then Mistystar meowed, "Well, I think this Gathering has come to a close."

Bramblestar nodded. "Then until the next full moon, may StarClan light your paths." the dark brown tabby tom looked at Rowanstar and said, "Can we stay a bit longer and discuss Jayfeather's position?"

"Of course," Rowanstar replied, with a dip of his head.

Mistystar and Onestar jumped down from their perches and disappeared into the crowd, most likely to mingle with the other Clans before they returned to their camps. Rowanstar and Bramblestar dropped to the ground as well, although they were now speaking in hushed tones with Jayfeather and Leafpool.

I stood up to approach Dawnpelt, maybe ask how she felt about the whole thing, but Heathertail and Olivenose were already taking care of her. I hesitated; I usually delighted in the chance to socialize with the other Clans, make some friends and flirt with some she-cats, but right now the only she-cat I wanted to be around was Dawnpelt.

Just then a familiar, silver tabby pelt caught my attention. _Well, I guess I can talk to Dawnpelt back at camp…_

 **Dawn Frost**

"Hey," I purred huskily, prompting Shimmerpelt to spin around in surprise. "Fancy seeing you here."

A lopsided smirk ruined Shimmerpelt's surprised expression. "Hey yourself," she returned. The beautiful she-cat excused herself from the group of cats she'd been conversing with, and gestured for me to walk with her. I obediently complied.

"You could spend your time with any she-cat here, and yet you chose me," she remarked, as we weaved between crowds. "I'm flattered, Crowfrost."

"You should be," I replied, haughtily. "I'm a _very_ desired tom."

Shimmerpelt snorted, amused. "So I've heard. Do you know Cherryleaf? She's a ThunderClan warrior."

"I know everyone."

"Of course you do. Anyways, I overheard her talking to a couple other she-cats about you. Apparently she was hoping to talk to you tonight."

"Is that so?" I mused. "What about?"

The silver tabby she-cat shrugged. "I didn't catch any specifics. I think she just wanted some of your attention."

"Well, she can get in the back of the line."

Shimmerpelt laughed, a delicate, pretty sound. "You should be nicer to your fans," she scolded me.

"Hey, I'm nice!" I protested. Suddenly I shoved my muzzle into the side of Shimmerpelt's face and mumbled, "At least, I'm nice to _you_."

Shimmerpelt squaled, "Crowfrost, we're at a _Gathering_!" But when I pulled away I noticed that her blue eyes were alight with excitement and mischief. She lowered her voice and murmured, "Save that for when we're _alone_."

"I'll try," came my reply, although I was confused by the lack of emotions behind my words. No playfulness, no infatuation, nothing to indicate that I was feeling any sort of emotion. Just empty words. It struck me that this entire conversation, while enjoyable, meant absolutely nothing. I didn't want to talk to Shimmerpelt, I wanted to talk to _Dawnpelt_!

I let my frosty-blue gaze roam the crowd of cats, until I spotted the object of my search. Dawnpelt was still with Heathertail and Olivenose, although now she was also joined by Breezepelt of WindClan, and Grasspelt and Hollowflight of RiverClan. I wanted to groan aloud when I noticed that Spikefur had also joined their group.

I knew I didn't have to worry about Breezepelt; everyone knew about his love/hate relationship with Heathertail, and how he'd had a crush on her since they were apprentices. The way he stood possessively close to her in the midst of toms only confirmed my thoughts. No, it was Grasspelt, Hollowflight, and _Spikefur_ who filled me with dread. The three toms were all young, mateless, and had their gazes fixed upon Dawnpelt.

I'd made up my mind to march over to the group of warriors and drag Dawnpelt away, when I remembered two things: One, I was currently occupied with Shimmerpelt. And two, I had absolutely no reason to drag Dawnpelt away from her group. We weren't mates, we didn't harbor any romantic feelings towards each other. We were just friends. Good friends, close friends, even, but still just friends.

 _Of course, everyone knows how much Dawnpelt hates it when toms gawk at her, or try to flirt with her. Maybe I'll be doing her a favor!_

 _You keep telling yourself that,_ My conscious replied.

Before I could decide to do anything Shimmerpelt nudged my shoulder and said, "I think Rowanstar wants to speak with you."

I followed her gaze and sure enough, the large ginger tom was staring at me. When our eyes met he gestured for me to join him, Bramblestar, and Jayfeather.

"Duty calls," I mumbled, and bid Shimmerpelt farewell. Inwardly I was relieved to get away from the stunning she-cat; Shimmerpelt was fun to flirt around, but tonight my heart just wasn't in it. I couldn't keep my focus off of Dawnpelt.

I pushed through crowds, winked at she-cats and sent them swooning, and then took a seat beside Rowanstar. He was frowning lightly. "Did you just _wink_ at Icecloud?"

I shrugged. "I wasn't really winking at anyone specific. Just groups of she-cats."

"And yet they're _arguing_ over which one of them you winked at," Bramblestar murmured, gaze focused on the group of she-cats. He sounded begrudgingly impressed.

"They are?" I spun around and grinned when I realized that Bramblestar was right. They _were_ arguing over me! "StarClan, I love Gatherings!"

Jayfeather snorted. "Because she-cats fight over you?"

I flicked my tail, dismissively. "You're a medicine cat, you wouldn't understand."

"Crowfrost," Rowanstar meowed loudly, before Jayfeather could respond. "Jayfeather is going to arrive early tomorrow morning, so I want you to go back to camp and ready the medicine cat den for him. Clean it up some, put together a new nest…"

I wrinkled my nose. _I have to leave the Gathering early because he's giving me apprentice duties?_ I only got to flirt with some of these she-cats once a moon! Now how was that fair?

Rowanstar went on to say, "You can take someone with you, if I you don't want to make the journey back to camp alone. Just don't take any detours," he finished, with narrowed amber eyes. I ducked my head, sheepishly.

And then it hit me; I had an excuse to get Dawnpelt away from those toms!

"Sure thing, Rowanstar," I chirped. "I'll just grab Dawnpelt and then be on my way!"

The ginger tabby tom flicked his tail, and then returned his attention towards Bramblestar and Jayfeather. I took that as my cue to leave, and set off to find Dawnpelt. Thankfully she hadn't moved a muscle, although she looked much more somber than I remembered.

"Hey," I murmured in her ear, which startled her. "I have to go back to camp and prepare Jayfeather's new den. Wanna come along?"

The creamy-colored she-cat glanced back at me, then her group, and then back at me again. "Go wait by the land bridge," she whispered back. "I'll meet you there in a second."

I wanted to protest (why couldn't she leave now? Did she want to stay behind to talk to one of the toms a little longer?) but instead I simply said, "Hurry," and darted towards the land bridge.

 **Dawn Frost**

Dawnpelt didn't make me wait very long, although it felt like moons until she finally appeared. "Come on," she muttered, as she brushed past me without a second thought and climbed upon the land bridge. I scoffed, but followed her. If I asked any other she-cat to come with me they would have been beside themselves in excitement!

We both landed gracefully on the other side of the bridge, and I shot her a playful smile. "I guess you're not going to need rescuing tonight, huh?"

Dawnpelt simply looked at me for a moment, and then she sighed and stated on the path back to camp. I frowned, confused. _What's wrong with her?_

 _The cat she accused of murdering her brother is coming to live in ShadowClan, you lizard-brain!_ My conscious snapped. My eyes widened; oh. That was right.

Suddenly Dawnpelt's entire attitude made sense. Ears flattened against her head; tail dragged against the ground; expression somber; silent.

Inwardly I was cursing myself for being so forgetful. This was why I wanted to talk to her in the first place!

I sped up so that we were walking side-by-side, and then waited to see if she would bring the topic up. But other than a brief glance Dawnpelt ignored my presence. _Do I even want to bring it up? It might be upset her even more._

When I was debating pros and cons, Dawnpelt spoke up. "Thank you."

"What?" I asked, as I blinked in confusion. "For what?"

The creamy-colored she-cat lowered her gaze again. "For saving me," she meowed, and I realized that this was her weak attempt of a joke. "I really didn't want to hang around Grasspelt and Hollowflight."

"What about Breezepelt and Spikefur?" I asked, and tried to keep the hope out of my question.

She shrugged. "Breezepelt and Heathertail argue and push each other into lakes-" Wait, what? "-But it's clear that they're going to end up mates. And I don't mind Spikefur. He's a nice tom, and a friend."

That should _not_ have made me want to groan with dread!

"I was just ready to get back to camp," Dawnpelt went on. "After Jayfeather volunteered to join ShadowClan…" she trailed off as she shook her head. I didn't respond and she didn't continue.

I was trying to figure out what to say to her, when I realized that maybe Dawnpelt didn't need to hear anything. Maybe she just needed to know that she wasn't alone in this. Actions spoke louder than words anyways, right?

Right.

It was that thought that encouraged me to press my pelt against hers, and to not draw back when she stiffened. She relaxed into the touch a few moments later, and I couldn't resist the urge to lick the top of her head. We stopped walking completely, and I leaned forward to whisper in her ear, "You're not alone in this. If you ever need to talk to someone, or you just want out of camp… I'll be here."

Dawnpelt sighed softly, and instead of responding with words she turned her head to the side so that she could bury her face in my chest. I swallowed thickly and prayed to StarClan that she couldn't hear the steady drumming of my heart. It was beating irregularity fast, like a rabbit racing across the moor.

She sat down where she was and I did as well, so that we wouldn't be forced to move out of our current position. I found that I quite liked it.

I curled my tail around hers so that they were twined together, and breathed a sigh of relief when she didn't protest. Instead she seemed to snuggle deeper into my fur. I rasped my tongue over her ear again. She sighed, content.

And at that moment, there were so many things I wanted to tell her. I didn't even know what I wanted to say, I just knew that words were dancing on my tongue and if I spoke they would come out in coherent sentences. But I didn't want to ruin the moment with words, so I kept them to myself; forever a mystery.

 _Rowanstar said no detours,_ My conscious gently reminded me.

 _I don't care, I want this moment with her._

 _Why?_

 _Because I..._ Why _did_ I want this moment so badly? _Because I don't want her to share it with Spikefur._

 _You're jealous._

 _I don't get jealous._

 _It's okay to admit that you have feelings for her, Crowfrost._

The thought struck me like lightning. I didn't have feelings for Dawnpelt, did I? I lowered my gaze so that I was staring at the top of her head, her face still hidden by my pelt. She was snuggled against me. Our tails were twined.

 _I don't have feelings for her._

The beating of my heart said otherwise.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **Are you a Disney or Dreamworks fan?**

 **#DISNEY!**

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 **If you guys haven't read my profile yet, I'm going to be out of town with my youth group until July 9th. Until that time I won't be able to respond to PMs or work on chapters, but I promise I'll get back on it when I return!**

 **I don't have much to say about this chapter. Certain parts were really fun to write, but for the most part, I didn't enjoy it. *Sighs* Well, after two lousy chapters, hopefully this next one will be a _blast_ to write? To be fair I was never looking forward to these past two chapters, but they needed to happen for plot purposes. **

**For those of you who don't know, I'm still running the poll contest on my profile! The third set was just updated :)**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	12. No One Can Run Forever

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did than Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

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 **Chapter Twelve - No One Can Run Forever**

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 **"** **I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once."** **―John Green, The Fault in Our Stars**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

When I awoke the next morning, I didn't know who I wanted to stress over the most: Jayfeather or Crowfrost.

Before last night I would have chosen Jayfeather, no competition. The ThunderClan tom who I'd accused of murder was coming to live in ShadowClan? I couldn't say I was thrilled by the turn of events.

But then Crowfrost had to go and act all charming and considerate; he groomed my fur and twined our tails. We cuddled, and he whispered reassuring words in my ear. If I was being totally honest with myself, last night had been amazing. Just Crowfrost and I, everyone else forgotten. No annoyingly persistent toms, no stuck-up she-cats. Just me and Crowfrost, and it had felt so _right._ My head fit perfectly in the crook beneath his chin, and he smelled like the pines. I would have been content to stay in that position for forever.

But Crowfrost had to get back to camp, and too soon we had to split and continue on like nothing had happened.

And _that_ was why I didn't know who to focus on. Because Crowfrost and I had had a moment, and we were pretending like we hadn't. And for some reason it was slowly killing me.

It didn't seem to bother him, though. The handsome black and white tom was organizing dawn patrols and setting up the fox-guards, just in case the foxes decided to return. After Honeypaw's incident and Littlecloud's death he wasn't taking any chances.

I studied him for a moment. His pale blue eyes were bright with alertness, and his tail tip flicked idly from side to side. His pelt was groomed to perfection. No, he certainly didn't appear bothered. As a matter of fact I was beginning to question if the whole thing had simply been a dream.

"Hey, are you alright?" Spikefur's concerned voice broke through my thoughts, and I managed a weak smile in his direction.

"I'm fine," I replied. "I'm just… thinking about Jayfeather, that's all."

Spikefur's amber orbs softened. "Well, that explains why you looked so miserable." The comment prompt me to wrinkle my nose in disdain; _really?_ I was so bothered by Crowfrost that it was showing on my features? And I'd looked _miserable_?

"Yeah," I ground out between gritted teeth. "That explains it."

Spikefur flicked his tail uneasily, suddenly the picture of sheepishness. "Look, I know we're not exactly close, but I-... I care about you. And I hate to see you look so depressed. How about we- that is, if you'd like to, how about we get out of camp and go for a walk or-"

"Spikefur!" a voice interrupted the dark brown tom. I didn't know whether to be elated or annoyed when I immediately placed the voice. Crowfrost's gaze was trained solely on Spikefur as he meowed, "I want you to keep an eye on Honeypaw until the ThunderClan cats arrive. Inform Rowanstar if her condition changes at all."

Spikefur's whiskers twitched with irritation but he was too well-mannered to argue with the Clan deputy. Instead he shot me an apologetic glance before standing up and leaving to watch over Honeypaw. I was so focused on watching his tail disappear into the den that I didn't notice Crowfrost approach me.

"Wow," he remarked. "He _really_ likes you."

"Then why do you keep interrupting us?" I asked hotly, although a small part of me didn't really mind. Spikefur was a sweet tom, but any romantic attractions were completely one-sided. _Still,_ a larger part of me thought, _that doesn't explain why Crowfrost has made it his personal mission to keep us apart._

If I didn't know any better, I'd think Crowfrost was _jealous_.

The handsome deputy scoffed, offended, although I noticed the amusement that gleamed behind his ice-blue eyes. "You think I'm interrupting you on _purpose_?"

The dry expression upon my features seemed to speak for itself.

Crowfrost shrugged. "Whatever. You can't prove anything."

He implied that there was something to prove. Of course Crowfrost was interrupting Spikefur and I on purpose - at this point there was no way it was always a coincidence - but _why_? Again, if he were another tom I wouldn't hesitate to assume it was due to jealousy, but this was _Crowfrost_ ; I wasn't sure he was even capable of becoming jealous over a she-cat! And if he was capable, why would he be jealous of Spikefur?

Crowfrost… Crowfrost didn't _like_ me, did he?

"Dawnpelt, you still with me?" Crowfrost asked, as he jerked me out of my thoughts. "You zoned out there for a moment."

"Uh, I was thinking about Jayfeather," I quickly lied, as I tried to ignore the prickling sensation beneath my pelt. I didn't enjoy lying to others, but how could I tell Spikefur or Crowfrost who I was really thinking about?

Crowfrost narrowed his pale orbs. "Do I look like Spikefur to you?" he demanded. "Come on Dawnpelt, we both know the answer to that. I mean, I'm _way_ more handsome than Spikefur, my eyes alone are-"

"What's your point?" I growled. I didn't want to hear anyone else gush over how amazing Crowfrost's eyes were, much less Crowfrost himself.

" _My point is_ that that lie may work on Spikefur, but I'm not Spikefur." His voice softened. "You can tell me the truth, Dawnpelt. What's really bothering you?"

I know I just said that I didn't want to listen to anyone gush over Crowfrost's eyes, but-... the sincerity in them was almost unbelievable! Crowfrost could put up an incredible front when he wanted to, but there was no way the sincerity in his eyes was anything but genuine.

He really cared about me. He cared about me a lot.

 _Does he actually have feelings for me?_ The question sent my heart pounding. _No, there's no way. This is Crowfrost I'm talking about, for StarClan's sake! But how… why else would he care so much about me?_

Crowfrost must have taken my silence as defiance, because he huffed and said, "Fine then, if you won't tell me I'll just guess. You're thinking about last night, right?"

And then my heart stopped beating altogether. _Has he been thinking about it too?_

A smirk played across the ShadowClan tom's lips. " _Gotcha_."

I tried to appear nonchalant as I regained my voice, and shrugged. "It's crossed my mind. Are you telling me it hasn't crossed yours?" I didn't know why, but for some reason I felt like I would die if he said 'no'.

"Once or twice," came his calculated response. "I actually wanted to talk to you about it. Don't let… whatever that moment was, change the way you view me and you. I swear, it didn't mean anything."

The statement stirred a blizzard of emotions inside my heart. My brain wanted to analyze his words, but it didn't know which part to focus on first.

" _Once or twice…"_ He'd thought about it too. It wasn't just me.

" _I actually wanted to talk to you about it…"_ It bothered him too. He thought about it, mulled over it. He probably planned this exact conversation inside his head.

" _Don't let… whatever that moment was…"_ That was when my heartbeat started to slow down. How could he speak so casually about the moment that'd happened between us? Why did he not know what it was, or what it meant?

" _Me and you…" Me_ and _you_. Separate. Not together. Not _us_.

" _I swear, it didn't mean anything."_ And _that_ was when my heart _broke_.

That was when I realized that, no matter how vehemently I denied it, I had feelings for Crowfrost.

The sincerity in his eyes hadn't wavered. He meant every single word he spoke. The way he looked at me - not with pity, but with _compassion_ … he thought he was doing me a favor. He thought he was helping me. He didn't know he was hurting me in a way that no battle wound ever could.

When did I give him the power to make me feel so… so _heartbroken_?

 _Don't let him see how you're hurting,_ a voice whispered in the back of my head. _Grit your teeth and pretend last night didn't mean anything to you either. Show him that you don't care._

I didn't want to listen to the voice, but what other options did I have? To make a scene in front of the entire Clan? To flee into the forest and cry, and let him see just how much that moment meant to me?

" _Don't let… whatever that moment was, change the way you view me and you."_

Fine.

I pushed down the emotions that'd clogged my throat and raised my chin. "Is that all you wanted to talk about?" I asked, surprised by my own voice. I didn't sound hurt or broken. I sounded passive, bored.

My reaction seemed to surprise Crowfrost as well, although it only showed on his features for a moment. Then it was gone, replaced by a more casual expression. " _Um-hmm_. Well, no, one other thing: I think it's time to take Hailpaw out for night-training. His fighting moves are coming along well, and he's been training for a moon now. If you're ready, I think he is too."

" _If you're ready…"_ In other words, if you think you can handle it. If all those cold, romantic nights we spent together prepared you.

"What about Owlclaw and Cloverpaw? Will they be joining us?" I inquired.

Crowfrost shook his head. "Not tonight; Owlclaw is taking Cloverpaw to the other side of the territory, and they're going to train there. Cloverpaw has a tendency to be… distracting. I want Hailpaw completely focused tonight."

"Sounds good," I replied easily. "Then, if _that's_ all," I gazed at Crowfrost for conformation, and after a moment he nodded once, "I think I'll go talk to Spikefur about that walk. I'd rather not be in camp when Jayfeather arrives."

An emotion I didn't have time to identify flashed in Crowfrost's eyes, although his features remained perfectly schooled. "Fine," he meowed, his tone cool. "I'll see you later."

I hummed a farewell before I turned around and made my way towards the medicine cat den. I couldn't help but smirk, and for a minute I felt triumphant. Pride made me pick my paws up a little higher, and raise my tail. _Take that,_ I wanted to gloat. Crowfrost had all but rejected me, and I had handled it like a champion.

But then the triumph started to fade, and my heart started to sink inside my chest. Finally, after days of denial, I'd been forced to acknowledged that I had developed feelings for Crowfrost. And what had forced me to acknowledge this? The fact that Crowfrost didn't feel the same way about me.

 _It's his loss,_ I thought stubbornly. _Any tom would be beyond thrilled to take me as their mate. They would think Crowfrost has lost his mind. It's_ _ **his**_ _loss, not mine._

But if I hadn't lost anything, then why did the ache in my heart try to tell me otherwise?

I was relieved when I finally entered the medicine cat den; I needed something to distract my thoughts.

Spikefur was grooming his fur beside Honeypaw's makeshift nest. When he sensed my presence he lifted his head, and his amber eyes immediately brightened. "Hey," he softly meowed, so as to not disturb the sleeping apprentice.

"Hey," I replied, my voice just as soft as his. Guilt started to make my pelt prickle uncomfortably, but I pushed past the sensation and said, "About that walk you mentioned earlier - can I take you up on that right now?"

A grin played across the tom's lips. "Uh, yeah, of course! Just let me go get someone to take over my shift, and then I'll meet you at the entrance?"

"Sounds good," I breathed. "Um, try and ask Cloverpaw first? Owlclaw is giving her the morning off, and she always takes the opportunity to watch over Honeypaw."

"Thanks for the advice," Spikefur teased. His light-hearted tone evoked the smallest of smiles from me, and I ducked my head before I turned and exited the den.

As I made my way towards the camp entrance I tried to justify my walk with Spikefur. _I just need a friend right now, and Olivenose is out patrolling,_ I reasoned. _Tigerheart is on fox-alert. Owlclaw and I aren't close enough. Tawnypelt and Ivytail would see right through me, and know something is wrong. Spikefur is simply the best option._

It wasn't like I was manipulating Spikefur's apparent crush on me to distract my thoughts, or make a point to Crowfrost. Nope. Not at all.

I exhaled softly, a broken sound. _Maybe there_ _ **is**_ _some truth behind ShadowClan's infamous reputation. Some of us can be real fox-hearts._

The truth was, in that moment, I didn't deserve a tom like Spikefur.

"Alright, Cloverpaw agreed to take my shift," Spikefur announced, as he approached me. "Are you ready to go?"

I hesitated. _I should tell him the truth; that I'm only using his crush on me. I should apologize for trying to lead him on. This isn't fair. He doesn't deserve this._

The words were on the tip of my tongue, ready to be spoken. But then, out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Crowfrost. He was perched upon the Tall Boulder, his frosty-blue gaze focused intensely on me. He was watching me, waiting.

I resisted the urge to clench my jaw and narrow my eyes. Instead I fixed my gaze on Spikefur and smiled warmly. "Uh-huh. Come on, let's go."

He shot me a grin and gestured for me to lead the way. I did so without complaint, and allowed the faintest smirk to grace my lips as I felt Crowfrost's gaze bore into the back of my head.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

I couldn't believe it. She actually left with him.

 _Does that bother you?_ My conscious asked. _I mean, if you don't have feelings for her-_

 _Shut-up._

Dawnpelt didn't like Spikefur. I knew she didn't. I'd read her expression, her actions. She had absolutely no romantic interest in that- that _subpar_ tom! So then why did she leave with _him_ , of all cats? If she wanted to escape the camp so badly she could have asked me to go with her - did our conversation from last night slip her mind already? I'd specifically told her, " _If you ever need to talk to someone, or you just want out of camp, I'll be here."_

What happened to that?!

Okay, _maybe_ our conversation about last night had affected her more than she let on. But that still didn't explain why she wanted to go on a walk with _Spikefur_! Why didn't she ask Olivenose, her best friend? Or Tigerheart, her faithful brother? Ivytail, her former mentor? Tawnypelt, her loving mother?

 _Why did she ask_ _ **Spikefur**_ _?_

Oh, this was going to bother me.

Did I read her wrong? Was it possible that she had feelings towards the dark brown tom? After all, as far as I knew Dawnpelt had never harbored a crush on anyone, not even _me_ , so it wasn't like I had an example to base my reading on. Could it be that I was… _wrong_?

No, no I was never wrong. There was no way in StarClan that Dawnpelt had a crush on someone as plain and drab as Spikefur. Absolutely no way.

" _Plan and drab" you say?_ My conscious remarked. _Try polite and respectful. Doesn't have a rebellious bone in his body. Loyal, faithful, doesn't play with she-cats' feelings. He sounds exactly like the type of tom Dawnpelt would fall for._

 _You know, you have a really annoying way of putting things._

But, as much as I hated to admit it, my conscious made a great point. From Dawnpelt's perspective, Spikefur must have been everything she'd ever wanted in a tom. Someone who would never dream of testing the rules, or defying their Clan leader. Someone who took every aspect of Clan life seriously. Someone who didn't have a history of breaking hearts.

It hit me that Spikefur and I were polar opposites, and she was leaning hard towards him.

 _Not,_ I added hastily, _that I care. Dawnpelt can court whomever she wishes. It doesn't affect me in the least._

…

…

…

 _WHY DID SHE ASK SPIKEFUR?_

Great StarClan, that was going to bother me!

"So Dawnpelt's moved onto another tom already, huh?" Smokefoot asked, when he appeared at my side. "And here I thought you'd both found your soulmates in each other."

"Me and Dawnpelt?" I scoffed, "You're hilarious. Besides, we've already been through this whole 'soulmate' thing. Scorchfur is my soulmate trapped in a tom's body, remember?"

"I am not!" Scorchfur growled, as he padded past us.

"Stop trying to deny it, Scorchpetal!" I called gleefully after the dark gray tom, which earned me a few bewildered stares. I brushed them off and turned to Smokefoot, who was trying his best to not let his amusement show on his features but was failing miserably. "In all seriousness, no. I'm not romantically attracted to Dawnpelt."

Smokefoot snorted. "What about that "moment" you two had last night?"

I shrugged. "It didn't mean anything."

The smoky-black tom fixed me with a hard look. "Do I look like Dawnpelt to you?" he demanded. "Come on Crowfrost, we both know the answer to that. For one she's a she-cat and I'm a tom, and we-"

"You were listening to our conversation?" I exclaimed, annoyed.

Smokefoot didn't seem apologetic in the least as he replied, "You were having it _right outside the elders den_. I couldn't help but overhear!"

I huffed and glared at my paws, but when Smokefoot laid his tail across my back I had to look up. His dark blue eyes had softened, and he said, "Look, I know why you feel so strongly against taking a mate. You know I do. But I think it's time for you to stop listening to your pride and your fears, and just admit it to yourself: you like Dawnpelt."

"I don't-"

"That's a load of fox-dung and you know it, Crowfrost."

 _Smokefoot knows what he's talking about,_ my conscious piped up.

"You don't know what you're talking about," I meowed dismissively. "I don't like Dawnpelt." Before Smokefoot could argue with me I rushed on. "What about you? When are _you_ going to take a mate?" I challenged him.

I was surprised when the blue-eyed tom hesitated. "I… I actually wanted to talk to you about that. But this isn't a conversation we should have in camp. Why don't we-"

A sudden yowl interrupted him, and both of our heads shot up. Ivytail, who'd been on fox-alert by the pond, marched into camp with a patrol of ThunderClan cats behind her. I was surprised by the amount of warriors that came to escort Jayfeather. Counting the medicine cat, there was also Foxleap, Blossomfall, Cherryleaf, and Brackenfur, the stand-in deputy for Squirrelflight. That was a total of five cats.

I narrowed my frost-colored eyes. _It should have only taken a warrior or two, not four. Why did they bring so many?_ "Well," I started dryly, "Duty calls. We'll have that conversation later, alright?"

Smokefoot flicked his tail. "Sure, don't worry about it." A smirk played across his lips as he added, "Go do your thing, deputy."

I returned his smirk with one of my own, and then started towards the ThunderClan patrol. Rowanstar reached our "guests" a moment before I did, and was already greeting Brackenfur. When I appeared he acknowledged me with a respectful dip of his head, and I noticed that Blossomfall and Cherryleaf seemed interested in my presence as well. I resisted the urge to smirk, and instead focused on Brackenfur and Rowanstar.

"I see you've brought a full patrol with you," Rowanstar remarked. "What, your Clanmates couldn't bare to give Jayfeather their farewells back in ThunderClan?"

I added, "You must be popular."

Jayfeather snorted.

Brackenfur cracked a small smile, although I couldn't help but think it looked forced. "It's something like that. After the Gathering last night Bramblestar decided on an extra requirement regarding Jayfeather's services, and, well… I don't suppose we could talk somewhere more private?"

Rowanstar narrowed his amber eyes, but after a moment he nodded. "We can speak in my den. Crowfrost will join us." His tone indicated that he left no room for arguments.

Brackenfur dipped his head. "That's fine. This is something I'm sure you'll want to consult with your deputy anyways." he turned to look at his patrol. "Jayfeather, don't get comfortable until we've finished talking. As for you three," I noticed that his gaze focused on Foxleap, "don't cause any trouble."

Blossomfall huffed, as if the order offended her, but Foxleap simply grinned. I figured he received that order a lot.

Rowanstar led the way to his den, with Brackenfur behind him while I brought up the rear. On our way I passed Waspstripe and Starlingwing, and I paused to gesture to the ThunderClan patrol. "Keep an eye on them," I murmured. "If they look a little too interested in the camp, I give you full permission to make a scene."

The two young toms exchanged grins. "Don't worry about a thing, Crowfrost," Starlingwing mewed. "We've got this."

A smirk tugged at my lips as I resumed walking once more. Rowanstar and Brackenfur were already in the den, settled and waiting for me. I took a seat at the lip of the den, alert for the first signs of trouble.

It was Rowanstar who spoke first. "You said that Bramblestar added a requirement to our deal?" he asked, his mew faintly impatient.

Brackenfur nodded once. "He did, and it's the reason why we brought such a large patrol. Along with our previously settled requirements, Bramblestar wants a ThunderClan warrior to stay in ShadowClan with Jayfeather. When Jayfeather returns to ThunderClan, so will they."

For a moment I could only stare at the golden-brown tom, stunned. _There's no way he's serious,_ I thought. But one look at Brackenfur's determined expression told me all I needed to know. This wasn't a joke.

Rowanstar and I seemed to come to this realization at the same moment, because right then we both started to voice our thoughts on _that_ idea. I happily noted that we were on the same wavelength.

Brackenfur raised his tail for silence, and I had to stop myself from biting it. How _dare_ that stand-in deputy silence the leaders of ShadowClan!

"Bramblestar said this isn't negotiable," he started, almost apologetic. "He said that if you refuse to abide by this requirement, then Jayfeather would return to camp with me."

So that was why Brackenfur told Jayfeather to not get comfortable. It was still very possible that ShadowClan would be without a medicine cat.

Even from where I stood, I could tell that Rowanstar was gritting his teeth. "What inspired Bramblestar to demand this requirement?" he asked. "Does he think that we'll hold Jayfeather hostage?"

Brackenfur shook his head. "No, but because of Jayfeather's blindness, he wanted a ThunderClan warrior around to help him adapt to your territory. Bramblestar also thought that having one of his Clanmates stay with him would help relax him."

Rowanstar still didn't seem convinced, and frankly neither was I. "Bramblestar and I talked about assigning a ShadowClan warrior to Jayfeather, to introduce him to the territory. We decided upon Spikefur." I wrinkled my nose. _Spikefur? Ugh, he's too busy mooning over Dawnpelt to be of any help to anyone._ "Does Bramblestar understand that if we take in a ThunderClan warrior we'll have to teach them how to hunt in our territory, where to find bedding…" he trailed off as he shook his head. "It'll be like training an apprentice!"

"Not to mention," I finally spoke up, "that this would give one of your warriors the perfect opportunity to memorize our territory and learn our secrets."

To his credit, Brackenfur really didn't look like he liked this idea anymore than we did. But still he meowed, "Bramblestar said this wasn't negotiable. If you refuse to accept this requirement, you'll have to seek help from RiverClan."

Rowanstar narrowed his amber orbs, then looked past Brackenfur to focus on me. "What do you think?" he asked.

I shook my head. "I don't like it at all, but… you saw Willowshine and Mothwing last night. They really didn't want to come to ShadowClan." Probably because they were intimidated by our sheer awesomeness. "On the other paw, Jayfeather _volunteered_ to join us."

"Yes, it came as quite a surprise to us too," Brackenfur remarked. "Jayfeather isn't the type of cat to volunteer for such a thing."

"You mean because we accused him of murder?" I asked, sarcastic. Rowanstar shot me a dry look.

Brackenfur looked faintly amused. "I meant because he isn't outgoing; Jayfeather prefers to keep to himself. But… that as well."

Rowanstar met my gaze. "I'm not sure we have very many options. It's not certain that one of the RiverClan medicine cats would join us, and I'm sure the requirement stands even if Leafpool were to join instead of Jayfeather?" The large ginger tom looked at Brackenfur for confirmation, and he nodded once.

I sighed, heavily. "So it's either we accept the requirement and get Jayfeather _and_ a ThunderClan warrior, or we risk not having a medicine cat at all."

Rowanstar shook his head. "It isn't worth it. Honeypaw's fate is still uncertain, and it's too dangerous to go through leaf-bare without a medicine cat."

Brackenfur's ears perked forward. "So then you agree to the requirement? A ThunderClan warrior will join alongside Jayfeather?"

After a moment's hesitation, Rowanstar nodded. "Which warrior did Bramblestar have in mind?"

 _Please say Thornclaw, please say Thornclaw, please say Thornclaw!_

Brackenfur flicked his tail. "He's going to let you decide that, Rowanstar. Your choices are: Foxleap, Blossomfall, or Cherryleaf." As an afterthought, he added, "Just a friendly suggestion: don't pick Foxleap."

I pouted. _Mouse-dung, Thornclaw isn't even an option._ Such a shame, really. Thornclaw was always fun to mess with.

So that left us with Blossomfall or Cherryleaf.

Blossomfall, who was proud and insolent, or Cherryleaf, who Dawnpelt and Olivenose both despised with a passion. Hard decisions indeed.

Thankfully Rowanstar didn't have much trouble with the decision. "Blossomfall," he meowed surely. "I've spent hours listening to Dawnpelt complain about Cherryleaf. Inviting her to live in ShadowClan would be like asking the Dark Forest to invade again."

My eyes widened. _Wait a minute, didn't Blossomfall train in the Dark Forest?_ Fox-dung, not another trainee to discriminate against! Playing favorites was already exhausting enough!

Rowanstar stood to his paws, and Brackenfur smiled as he copied him. "I'm glad we reached an understanding, Rowanstar."

"If you could even call it that," I grumbled underneath my breath, as I followed the two toms out of the den. Rowanstar shot me a look, although it wasn't necessarily reprimanding. It was more like, _I know, right? Can you believe the nerve of this cat? He's not really even a real deputy, he's just a stand-in deputy. Plus, isn't he, like, practically ancient?_

… Maybe I'd read too far into that look.

Starlingwing and Waspstripe were posed beside the Tall Boulder, and I stopped once I reached their side. "I can't believe you didn't create a scene," I meowed. "If my deputy had given me full permission to create a scene, I would have done it the first time they so much as _blinked_."

Waspstripe shot me a grin. "Believe me, we wanted to, but then things got entertaining on their own."

Confused, I followed their gazes to the ThunderClan patrol, and then I grinned as well. Ferretclaw was pestering the ThunderClan cats, rambling on about StarClan-knows-what. By the looks of it, the ThunderClan cats didn't like Ferretclaw anymore than I did.

Foxleap, who was Ferretclaw's current target, looked ready to lunge for the tom's throat. "For the last time, Ferretclaw," he growled, "stop giving me nicknames! I don't want one!"

Ferretclaw frowned, as if Foxleap had just told him a joke and he didn't understand it. "Really?"

"Yes, really!"

"He's said that four times now," Cherryleaf growled.

Blossomfall shrugged, aggravated. "Six times actually, but who's keeping count?"

Ferretclaw ignored the she-cats, instead he tilted his head to the side and asked, "So I can't give you any more nicknames? No more Foxy, Foxykins, or Foxaloxadingdong?"

" _No_!"

"Crowfrost," Rowanstar meowed, an amused expression worn upon his features. "You might want to call your friend back."

The grin I'd been sporting immediately fell, and I shot Rowanstar a hard look. Why did he delight in making me deal with Ferretclaw? _Maybe he's a sadist,_ I thought bitterly.

"Ferretclaw," I called, not a trace of enthusiasm in my voice, "come here."

"If he's coming then I'm leaving," Starlingwing muttered. "See you later, Crowfrost." Waspstripe echoed his friend, and then they were bounding across the camp. I glared after them; _traitors._

Meanwhile Ferretclaw's entire face lit up, absolutely delighted that his _best friend_ had called for him. He abandoned the ThunderClan patrol without so much as a 'goodbye' (not that they seemed to care, if their collective sigh of relief was anything to go by), and dashed towards me. However, the cream-and-gray tom wasn't looking where he was going so he didn't notice the patch of ice in front of him until it was too late. He slid on the patch, tripped over his paws, and crashed head-first into me. The force behind the impact sent me flying into the Tall Boulder.

 _Oh StarClan,_ I thought, as black spots danced before my eyes. _Please, not another concussion!_

But thankfully the spots dotted my vision for only a few more moments, and then they were gone. I stood shakily to my paws, relieved when my legs didn't immediately collapse from beneath my weight. After I assured myself that no _real_ harm had been done, my head shot up and I glared at Ferretclaw.

Ferretclaw smiled pleasantly in return. "Hello," he meowed. "Did you miss me?"

"Not as much as you may think," I shot back.

The cream-and-gray tom laughed, and I didn't even bother to resist the urge to roll my eyes. Sometimes I wondered who was more insane: Kinkfur, or Ferretclaw?

"So, Crowfrostyfrost," Ferretclaw started, "did you call me over here so that we could go hunting together?"

"Of course not."

He tilted his head to the side. "Oh… well, _can we_ go hunting together?"

I scoffed. "Sure, Ferretclaw, we can go hunting together. And right after that we can sprout wings and fly to the moonpool, and start drowning squirrels in its water."

It was sarcasm, _obviously_ , but judging by the fact that Ferretclaw looked so excited I thought he might pass out, he didn't quite realize that. "R-r- _really_?" he gasped. "C-Crowfrost, I would _love_ to drown squirrels with you!"

It was Ferretclaw. Ferretclaw was more insane than Kinkfur.

Just then Rowanstar padded over, Jayfeather and Blossomfall in tow. "Crowfrost, I want you to show Jayfeather to his den. Make sure he gets settled in. I'll find someone else to show Blossomfall around."

I nodded, not particularly pleased with my assignment, but if I had to choose between a blind, grumpy medicine cat or a Dark Forest trainee, I would pick the medicine cat every day for the rest of my life.

Before I could get on with my task, Ferretclaw stepped in front of me and meowed, "Actually Rowanstar, Crowfrost can't show Jayfeather to his den. See, we just made plans to go hunting and then fly to the moonpool."

I was desperately trying to get Rowanstar's attention, shaking my head and begging him not to press the topic. Of course, this only peaked his curiosity. "Oh?" Rowanstar mused. "And what exactly are you going to do once you reach the moonpool?"

"We're going to drown squirrels!" Came Ferretclaw's enthusiastic reply.

The identical looks of shock that masked Rowanstar, Jayfeather, and Blossomfall's features were comicial. As a matter of fact, I would've been _howling_ with laughter had their stares not all directed towards _me._

I flashed Ferretclaw the sharpest glare I could muster. "You really don't understand how this whole 'sarcasm' thing works, do you?"

 **Dawn Frost**

"So," I drawled out, as I led Jayfeather to his new den, "how's the prey running in ThunderClan?"

"If you would have been paying attention to Bramblestar's report last night, you would know," came Jayfeather's blunt retort.

I shot the pale gray tabby tom a hard look, and then remembered that he was blind and had no idea I was even looking at him. _Well, that complicates things,_ I thought to myself. Sometimes I felt like all I ever did was glare or smirk.

When we reached the den Cloverpaw was hovering nervously over her sister. "Hey Cloverpaw," I meowed, "how is she?"

The gray she-cat shrugged, sadly. "There hasn't been any change," she mumbled. "Sometimes she wakes up long enough to lap up some water, but most the time all she does is sleep."

"Sleep is good for her," Jayfeather spoke up. "Her body's using this time to recover."

"Why don't you go find Owlclaw, Cloverpaw?" I suggested. "He'll probably want to go over some things with you before your session tonight."

Her green eyes darkened. "Do I have to? Can't I stay here w-"

"She'll be fine without you, Cloverpaw," I meowed firmly. "You can come see her later. Right now Jayfeather has to settle in, and that'll be easier to do without an extra cat in the den."

The normally-energetic she-cat sighed, but she didn't protest again. Instead she padded tiredly out of the den, and I couldn't help but think that after she talked to Owlclaw, she should probably take a nap.

"That was Honeypaw's sister?" Jayfeather asked, as he stepped into the den. He parted his jaws and then started poking around the den, so I hovered at entrance, careful to stay out of his way. For a blind cat he moved rather sure-footedly.

"Uh-huh, that was Cloverpaw." As an afterthought I added, "They have a brother, too. Hailpaw. He's my apprentice."

The only response I received from the pale gray tom was a soft _hum_. I frowned, as I watched him sniff a few herbs. He certainly wasn't very talkative, was he?

"How did Littlecloud keep water for his patients?"

"Wet moss," I replied. "There's a fresh stream behind the den, along with some extra moss. If it snows again-" _Great StarClan, please no more snow!_ "-then you could use that too."

"Brilliant," Jayfeather muttered sarcastically. "I never would have thought of that."

"You're blind so you can't tell, but I just want you to know that I'm glaring at you."

Jayfeather simply snorted, seemingly unaffected by this news.

My conscious, however…

 _I can't believe you're bullying a blind medicine cat!_

I rolled my frost-colored eyes. _Oh,_ _ **please**_ _! Jayfeather is one of the rudest cats in all the Clans._

 _That doesn't change the fact that he's a medicine cat, and all medicine cats should be treated with the utmost respect! Plus, he's_ _ **BLIND**_ _._

"I don't care if he's blind!" I snapped. Too late I realized that I'd said this _outloud_.

Jayfeather regarded me with a baffled expression. "You're a strange cat," he finally meowed. "Why did Rowanstar make you his deputy?"

I scoffed, offended. "Because I'm an unbelieveable warrior! Besides, you're one to talk. You're grumpy, rude, and you don't have any patience whatsoever. Whose idea was it to train you as a medicine cat?"

"StarClan's," the gray tabby tom retorted. "At least I don't drown squirrels in sacred pools."

I rolled my pale blue orbs. "Ugh, I already said I didn't- oh, whatever. Forget it."

"Gladly."

And that was that.

We fell into an uncomfortable since, which I usually couldn't stand, but I would have rather sat in silence than converse with Jayfeather. Occasionally he would ask a question, like where to find a specific herb, but that was all.

Eventually he finished his inspection of the den, and turned his sightless blue eyes towards Honeypaw. "Rowanstar never went into specifics regarding her injuries; just that she was attacked by a fox. What kind of injuries did she suffer from, exactly?"

I lowered my gaze to the small, golden-brown she-cat. "A broken hind-leg, most importantly. We think the fox threw her into a pine tree. Besides that she has a few gashes and cuts, but they're nothing major; most of them shouldn't even scar. She's still sore, obviously. Oh, and trauma. She's suffered a whole lot of trauma."

Jayfeather flicked his tail. "None of that should keep her from becoming a warrior. Her leg will heal as long as it's properly cared for, the soreness will fade, and she'll get over the trauma. What makes you think she'll want to train as a medicine cat?"

"Thus far she's had a lousy apprenticeship," I replied. "She can't hunt, can't track scents, and you should see her fight; she's so terrible, it's almost offensive to watch!"

"I'm blind, so I doubt her fighting abilities would offend me."

I ignored him as I continued, "Not only that, but she's always shown an interest in healing. When she was a kit she used to watch Littlecloud work, and before the fox incident, whenever she had the time, she would help him with his duties."

A flick of his tail was the only response I received from the pale gray tom. If it hadn't been for that small gesture I would have thought Jayfeather was ignoring me. _I bet he's the life of ThunderClan,_ I thought, dryly.

The silence settled upon us once more, not that I was complaining. Jayfeather was reorganizing the herbs so that he was more comfortable among them, and I was grooming my pelt. I'd just begun to work on my chest when Jayfeather asked, "Where's Dawnpelt?"

I froze. Jayfeather was staring at me with his sightless blue eyes, and a small part of me thought that the tom could be quite unnerving. Finally, slowly, I meowed, "She left camp right before your patrol showed up."

"She's avoiding me." I didn't know whether or not it was a question or a statement.

"You know," I started hesitantly, "she blames herself for Flametail's death."

"Does she?" Jayfeather mused, as he returned to sorting herbs. "Well, she should. It was her fault."

Somewhere inside my stomach, a slowly burning ember sparked a flame. "It's not like she knew the ice was going to crack," I snapped.

Jayfeather paused his work and then meowed, "You're awfully protective of her. I don't care about Clan gossip, but last I heard, you two were mortal enemies."

I scoffed, " _Firestar_ and _Tigerstar_ were mortal enemies. Dawnpelt and I just didn't like each other." Okay, maybe that was putting it lightly. I could recall comparing the she-cat to Tigerstar on more than one occasion. I actually said it to her face once; she'd raked her claws across my cheek in response.

"But your relationship has changed?"

I shot the blind tom a cold glare, which felt a bit wasted since he couldn't see it. "I thought you said you don't care about Clan gossip?"

"I don't," Jayfeather replied.

"You sure about that?" I asked sarcastically. When I didn't get so much as a whisker-twitch of response, I decided to ask the question that had been bothering me ever since the Gathering ended. "Why did you volunteer to join ShadowClan? Everyone knows about your history with Dawnpelt, so why didn't you just let Leafpool join us instead?"

For a few moments I didn't think Jayfeather was going to grace me with an answer. He didn't show any signs that he'd even heard my question. But finally, right before I was ready to storm out of the den, he stopped working and sighed. "It's complicated," he began slowly. "I didn't want to join ShadowClan, but a few nights ago, when all of the medicine cats met at the Moonpool, an old medicine cat spoke with me. She didn't go into specifics, but she said that a Clan was going to need my help soon. I assumed she meant that disaster was going to strike ThunderClan and they would need me more than ever, but when Rowanstar announced that you were without a medicine cat, I realized she meant ShadowClan."

I blinked, surprised. "A StarClan cat told you to join us?" _Well, aren't you something special._

"She never came out and told me I had to join, but I'm sure it's what she wanted me to do." Judging by his expression, the ThunderClan tom really wasn't pleased with his orders. I briefly contemplated who this StarClan she-cat was, but I doubted he would actually tell me.

"So… why do you think StarClan chose you, specifically?" I asked. "Why not Leafpool, or one of RiverClan's medicine cats?" I wondered… I knew Dawnpelt still carried a lot of guilt for falsely accusing Jayfeather of murder. Was that why StarClan sent him? So that they could resolve things?

Jayfeather simply shrugged and said, "I don't know."

I figured that was the most I was going to get out of the grumpy tom, and he seemed pretty comfortable in the den. I had pressing matters to attend to, I couldn't sit there and kitsit a blind medicine cat all day. "Do you still need me?" I checked, as I stood to my paws.

"I never needed you in the first place."

I snorted, and then meowed dryly, "Well, see you later then."

He didn't respond.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes as I padded out of the den. _He's going to be fun to have around_.

As I emerged from the den, several things caught my eye. Owlclaw was speaking to Cloverpaw, the picture of concern. Whatever they were talking about, Cloverpaw didn't seem incredibly interested in the conversation. She was just nodding, a dull gleam in her bright green eyes.

Tigerheart was showing Blossomfall around, and judging by their expressions, neither of them were pleased with their tasks. _Two Dark Forest trainees. How appropriate._

Smokefoot and Applefur were hanging outside the elders' den, whispering to each other in a way that made the fur stand up along my spine. Littlecloud always assigned Applefur to help Smokefoot with his exercises or bring him herbs, but now that Littlecloud had passed that was no longer necessary. I would have to speak with Jayfeather about keeping them apart.

I actually considered spinning around and marching back into the den to do just that, when my frosty-blue gaze drifted back towards Cloverpaw. Now that Owlclaw had disappeared, the gray she-cat was crouched beside the apprentices' den, a look of misery masked her features. For a moment I wasn't bothered - Cloverpaw wasn't my apprentice, and she was the daughter of Ratscar and Pinenose. Her wellbeing didn't concern me.

Except… it _did_ concern me. Not on an emotional level - not like it would Dawnpelt, her parents, or Owlclaw - but it was my responsibility to make sure that all of my Clanmates were healthy and satisfied. As much as I hated to show the Dark Forest trainees or their kin any care, if I wanted to forever secure my position in the Clan, I would have to continue making a show towards them. Keep pretending that my opinions of them had changed.

Sometimes it was hard being me.

I strolled towards Cloverpaw, and when my shadow fell upon the young she-cat she glanced up. Her troubled green eyes brightened a bit, but other than that, my presence didn't have much of an effect on her. Which was strange - even a blind lizard could tell that Cloverpaw admired me. She was constantly sneaking away from Owlclaw to talk to (read: annoy) me.

"Hi Crowfrost," she murmured. "Is something wrong?"

"I think _I_ should ask _you_ that question," I replied seriously. "You look like you're in a lot of pain. Did you eat some rotten fresh-kill?"

Cloverpaw blinked, alarmed. "Oh, uh, no, I'm fine." I narrowed my eyes. "Honestly!"

"Do I look like Owlclaw to you?" I demanded. "Come on Cloverpaw, we both know the answer to that! I'm _way_ smoother than he is, not nearly as awkward when it comes to flirting, and-" I stopped when I realized that Cloverpaw was gazing at me in confusion. "My point is I can tell you're lying. What's really bothering you?"

The dark gray she-cat hesitated. "I-I did something I really regret…"

Her confession caught me off guard. She wasn't ill? "What was it?"

Cloverpaw ducked her head, unable to meet my gaze, ashamed. "A few days ago I was bragging about what a great fighter I am, and Honeypaw snapped at me for it. So I teased her, and said that the only way she would ever become a warrior was if she managed to kill the fox that was roaming around." Her head shot up, and desperation and guilt mingled in her green eyes. "I didn't think she would take it seriously, honest! But she snuck out of camp and went after the fox by herself, to try and prove herself, and now…" she shook her head.

I closed my eyes and inhaled a breath to cool my anger. Ever since Honeypaw had been injured Cloverpaw had acted depressed, and her eyes were dull. I figured she was simply worried about her sister, but there was more to the story than that. She wasn't just _worried_ , she was _guilty_.

"Have you told anyone else about this?" I finally asked, an edge to my voice that made the young she-cat flinch.

She shook her head. "No one…"

I wanted to really snap at Cloverpaw; I wanted to shame her, and let her know that this kind of thing was unacceptable and disgraceful. But she wasn't my apprentice, and frankly, I didn't want to spend another heartbeat with her.

Voice hard as stone, I meowed, "I'll tell Rowanstar and Owlclaw about this, and they'll discuss your punishment. Until then don't leave camp, and don't pester Jayfeather. If I were you I would find a way to make myself useful."

Cloverpaw lowered her head so low that her nose nearly touched the cold, marshy ground. "Yes Crowfrost," she whispered, before she scampered off towards the elder's den, presumably to care for them.

As I watched her tail tip disappear inside the den, I couldn't help but think that this was exactly the kind of behavior I expected from a kit of Ratscar and Pinenose.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

I'd hoped that a walk with Spikefur would take my mind off of Crowfrost, but I had no such luck. Thoughts of the handsome black tom tormented my mind, and after we met the ThunderClan patrol exiting the territory, so did thoughts of a certain medicine cat.

 _I deserve this,_ I thought grimly. _This is what I get for taking advantage of Spikefur's feelings for me. I'm a horrible cat._

Spikefur was doing everything he possibly could to lift me from my slump, but his kind efforts were proved fruitless. He'd told me story after story, but the most I could bring myself to do was laugh quietly. No matter how hard I tried to pay attention to him, I simply couldn't forget about Crowfrost or Jayfeather.

Finally Spikefur looked at me with concern and meowed, "I think we should go back to camp, Dawnpelt. Clearly this isn't working, and besides, you'll have to face Jayfeather sooner or later."

I sighed, defeated. "Maybe you're right…" I couldn't bring myself to confess that I was dreading facing Crowfrost almost more than Jayfeather.

I noticed that Spikefur leaned forward to nudge my shoulder, but at the last second he stopped, conflicted, and drew back. I found myself wishing that he wouldn't have changed his mind; not because I wanted _his_ touch, just touch. Crowfrost had taught me that touch wasn't something to be bothered by; now I almost welcomed it.

But instead Spikefur meowed, "Come on, let's head back."

 **Dawn Frost**

"I bet a moon of dawn patrols that as soon as I step paw into camp, Crowfrost will assign me a task," Spikefur grumbled, as the camp entrance came into view.

"You really don't like him, do you?" I asked.

The dark brown tom shrugged, begrudgingly. "I respect his abilities and his passion to serve ShadowClan, but as a cat, I can't say that I do. I don't care how skilled you are, what your rank is, or how attractive cats may find you, no cat has the right to treat others with such blatant disrespect."

I swallowed; he was right. He was so very right. "You're talking about the Dark Forest trainees, aren't you?"

Spikefur shook his head. "It's not just them that he treats so poorly; he treats their kin the same way, as well as the she-cats he uses." The ShadowClan warrior laughed, dryly. "You know, at the Gathering last night I overheard so many she-cats gush over him. They talked about how handsome he was, how courageous he was, how powerful he was. They wished that he was apart of their Clan. For StarClan's sake, I overheard one she-cat go on and on about how she wished he would just _glance_ at her!"

By this point Spikefur looked disgusted. "Everyone thinks that Crowfrost is amazing; that he's some gift from StarClan. They worship the ground he walks on. Even those who know how arrogant he is, how disrespectful he can be, and what he does to she-cats… but no one ever talks about _those_ things. Either they justify those attributes, or they simply pretend they don't exist. And frankly, I believe that's wrong."

I did too. I believed that no cat had the right to behave in such a manner, and I believed that it was wrong to always excuse it. And if Spikefur and I had this conversation moons ago I would have yowled with joy because _someone finally understood_!

But now… now I just felt guilty. Because even though I believed the same way as Spikefur, I still wanted to make excuses for Crowfrost. He only despised Dark Forest trainees because he was so incredibly loyal to ShadowClan; he only used she-cats because they allowed him to. They practically threw themselves at Crowfrost, and he simply caught them.

Moons ago I would have agreed with everything that Spikefur said, but now I was just like those who I had so passionately loathed. And why? Because I had done exactly what I said I would never do; I'd fallen for Crowfrost.

"I think," Spikefur spoke up, more softly this time, "that that's why I like you so much." He glanced at me and dread started to make my stomach curl. "Because you think the exact same way I do. _You understand_."

I wasn't so sure I did anymore.

 **Dawn Frost**

The very moment Spikefur stepped paw into camp, Crowfrost's voice rang clear throughout the camp. "Spikefur, I want you to go to the pond and relieve Grassheart of her fox-guard duties. I'll send someone for you at sun-down."

Spikefur shot me a look that practically screamed 'I-told-you-so'. I shrugged in a way that I hoped conveyed, 'There's-nothing-you-can-do-about-it'.

As he padded out of camp, Crowfrost approached me. I observed the ShadowClan deputy - the tom I had feelings for - cooly. Muscles rippled smoothly underneath a sleek black pelt, tail twitched idly, and frosty blue eyes studied my own, as if daring me to look away.

"You could have given him a moment to rest his paws, you know," I meowed, my voice hard.

"Oh?" My suggestion didn't seem to concern Crowfrost. "Why? Does the _warrior_ need to take a break?" There was clearly a taunt in his question.

I met his gaze evenly. "Everyone needs to take a break now and then."

"Well, he's going to be sitting on his tail until sun-down, so he'll have plenty of time for that now, won't he?"

I stifled the growl that threatened to rumble in my throat, and wondered how in StarClan I managed to develop feelings for _this tom_ , of all cats. I focused on his eyes and tried to get a read on him; Crowfrost was a skilled actor with masterful control over his features, but his eyes couldn't keep secrets; they were far too expressive.

Anger sparked in his cold blue eyes like fire. "Why are you so angry?" I asked, eager to turn the topic away from Spikefur.

Crowfrost let his gaze drift from my face. "I found out why Honeypaw went after the fox. Cloverpaw was taunting her about how she would never become a warrior, and she wanted to prove herself."

Slowly, almost as if the action pained me, I squeezed my eyes shut. _Oh Cloverpaw…_ So that was why the dark gray she-cat had looked so miserable these past few days. She was guilty.

"Did you scold her?"

Crowfrost snorted. "I did more than scold her. I told Rowanstar and Owlclaw, and they've decided that for the rest of the moon, Cloverpaw has to become Honeypaw's personal servant."

I flicked an ear. "That's awfully generous of them."

"I thought she should go the rest of the moon without battle training, but," he shrugged, "they agreed that would set her too far behind in her apprenticeship."

"It would," I mused softly. My gaze floated, and eventually fell on the medicine cat den. Right then, as I spoke to Crowfrost, Jayfeather was in that very den. "Did Jayfeather get settled in?" I asked, and tried to appear nonchalant.

The black and white tom rolled his eyes. "Uh-huh, and guess who had to help him get settled in? _Me_."

"Poor you."

"He's very aggravating," Crowfrost went on. "I mean I thought a blind medicine cat in another Clan's camp would want as little trouble as possible, but it's like he only knows how to have conversations in complete sarcasm."

"Crowfrost," I breathed, exasperated, "You do the exact same thing!"

The tom's head snapped back around, and he looked at me with incredulous wide blue eyes. "I do not!" he protested.

I eyed him, unamused. "Whatever you say."

The ShadowClan deputy glared at me, but his eyes soon started to soften. "You should rest before our session tonight," he meowed. "I don't want you falling asleep on me."

My creamy-colored fur bristled along my spine. "Don't worry about me," I snapped. "I'm perf-..." I trailed off, as I stared into the tom's eyes. They were soft and full of concern, and I had to swallow the lump of emotions that arose in my throat. He could have just as easily been my mate, looking at me with those eyes and asking me to get some rest.

I practically wilted beneath his gaze. "Fine," I sighed, defeated. "I'll take a nap."

I brushed past him and headed towards the warriors' den, but when he followed me I glanced back, surprised. "What?"

"I'm taking a nap too," he replied.

" _You_?" Crowfrost never took naps! He actually claimed to hate them; he had too much energy for naps, and too many responsibilities to attend to.

His pawsteps didn't falter as he past me, and disappeared into the den. "Everyone needs to take a break now and then, Dawnpelt."

I scold as he used my own words against me, although my expression faded into one of fondness. _Lizard-brained tom._

The scowl returned full-force when I entered the den and noticed that he'd curled up in _my nest_. " _Hey_! Get out of my nest!"

The black and white tom stretched leisurely, as if he hadn't a care in the world. A yawn split his jaws and then he said, "But your nest is softer than mine."

I growled, "That's because I put new moss in it the other day. If you want a soft nest of your own then I suggest you do the same."

"But why would I do that when I could just use yours?"

My tail lashed like a serpent; that was _my_ nest! "So what?" I demanded. "You want me to sleep in your nest?"

He leaned his back to lick down a tuft of fur on his back. "Sure, if you want too. Or we could both use yours."

I blinked, caught off guard by his offer. My scowl faltered. "What?"

"It's large enough for the two of us," Crowfrost continued, as if I hadn't spoken. "It might be a bit tight fit, but _I_ don't have a problem _cuddling with you_ ," he finished, a playful smirk upon his lips.

The tips of my ears burned like they were on fire. "I am **not** cuddling with you," I growled.

Crowfrost shrugged, as he burrowed deeper into _my_ nest. "Suite yourself."

"Crowfrost, _move_!" I snapped, but the tom didn't even blink. His chest had started to rise and fall as if asleep, but I knew better. No one fell asleep _that_ quickly! He was just trying to get a rise from me.

 _Well, I'm not going to give him the satisfaction,_ I thought stubbornly, as I stifled a growl and stormed towards his nest. After only a moment's hesitance I lowered myself gracefully onto the worn moss. _His nest really isn't very soft,_ I noticed, surprised. Crowfrost firmly believed that he deserved perfection, so why was his nest so uncomfortable? Why did he have new, fresh moss?

 _He hardly ever uses it,_ I realized. ShadowClan cats required less sleep than the other Clans because of our night-habits, but still. We _did_ sleep. But Crowfrost's nest was cold and empty, as if he hadn't slept in moons. _Where does he sleep? Outside of camp, maybe?_

I shook my head in an effort to clear it; Crowfrost's sleeping habits were none of my business. Even so I wouldn't be able to use his nest; it was so uncomfortable! Twigs poked my sides, his moss was stale… _But just how desperate am I for a nap? Desperate enough to share a nest with Crowfrost?_

That was pretty desperate.

Maybe… maybe if we hadn't talked that morning. Maybe if he hadn't of told me that last night meant nothing to him. Maybe if I didn't have feelings for him.

But on the other paw, just how many opportunities did one get to cuddle with their crush? It didn't have to mean anything. It didn't have to affect me. After all, last night… last night had been amazing. We were so close, and I felt _wanted._ Not desired, not lusted, but _wanted._ Crowfrost knew me well, he knew what a sharp tongue I had, he helped me overcome my deepest fear. And yet he still _wanted_ me. Maybe not the same way I wanted him, but…

I wasn't one to make impulsive decisions but I was tired of analyzing the situation. Before I could think about it anymore I stood to my paws and marched over to _my_ nest. Without a word I shoved Crowfrost to make room, and then snuggled deep into the soft moss. I happily noted that our pelts hardly even brushed; there was enough room for both of us.

So imagine my surprise when Crowfrost curled his body around mine. Our pelts mingled and he came to rest his head on my shoulder, his muzzle pressed against my cheek.

My heart was beating so hard in my chest I was worried it might explode. "What are you doing?" I breathed.

Crowfrost didn't answer my question; instead he chuckled, a warm, husky sound that sent electric shivers down my spine. "I always knew you had feelings for me."

I would later swear that my once-pounding heart completely stopped beating.

A second of tense, cold silence, and then another, then another. I wanted to protest and argue but I couldn't even find the strength to part my jaws.

Finally, after what seemed like moons, Crowfrost laughed again. "I'm just kidding, Dawnpelt; Great StarClan, you're stiff with rage!"

I breathed a quiet sigh of relief. _He was just joking. He doesn't really know._

"Not," Crowfrost continued, "that anyone could blame you if you did. I mean, I'm kind of perfect."

I laughed softly, still weak with relief. "You're a lizard-brain."

"A perfect lizard-brain."

A quiet smile played across my lips, and just when I started to close my eyes and drift to sleep, I was startled again. Crowfrost was rasping his tongue smoothly over my shoulder. "Why can't you keep your paws to yourself?" I demanded.

"Sorry, Sweetheart. You're just too irresistible."

I tilted my head to shoot the tom a glare, to which he smirked. "Kidding again, Dawnpelt. You're still so stiff, I'm helping you relax. _You're welcome_!"

"I don't need your help," I growled lowly, and Crowfrost laughed. He seemed to be laughing a lot these days, even with all that had happened. Briefly I entertained the thought as to why.

He continued to rasp his tongue over my body; starting from my shoulder, down my spine and then the top of my flank. Circled around my ears. I found myself leaning against him, and stretching out so that he could reach my side. A drowsy purr rumbled in my chest, against my will.

Crowfrost paused to press his muzzle against my face. He murmured something that I couldn't quite catch, as my surroundings blurred and I faded into a dream-like state.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

I always used to like Dawnpelt best when she was asleep, and I still did, but for totally different reasons. Formerly, when she was asleep she couldn't argue against my every decision or make snide remarks. But now it was because she looked so _beautiful_. So _graceful_. So _perceful_.

A soft, content smiled had played across her lips. She looked safe, protected. I realized that I would have done anything in my power to make sure that she always felt that way.

Even though she'd fallen asleep I continued to rasp my tongue over her pelt. I honestly had planned on taking a nap, but now I dreaded to think of what would happen if she woke up before me and missed the caresses. I didn't want her to miss anything.

Besides, there was no way in StarClan I would be able to sleep now. Not while she was pressed so close against me, and while her scent filled my nostrils and jaw; she didn't smell pretty or soft like Shimmerpelt. She smelled like the pines in the forest, and their evergreen needles. She smelled like the freedom that came with racing the wind. Her scent reminded me of everything that I loved.

 _Oh Dawnpelt, what are you doing to me?_ I wondered, desperately. _I shouldn't feel this way towards you. I've never felt this way towards any she-cat before. I've never been in lov-..._

 _What have you done to me?_

 **Dawn Frost**

The silverpelt was dark and glittered with a thousand twinkling stars. It reminded me of the nights that Dawnpelt and I used to spend together, pressed warmly against each other inside a weeping willow tree.

Everything reminded me of her, it seemed.

At that moment Dawnpelt and I were hidden behind a large pine tree, while we waited for Hailpaw to find us. This was his first training session in the dark, and the apprentices always seemed to pick up tracking well. They had to rely mostly on their senses, seeing as their night-vision would take a couple nights to really develop.

Speaking of senses, mine were going crazy.

"How do you think he's doing?" Dawnpelt asked quietly, her hazel gaze focused solely on the clearing in front of us, where Hailpaw should appear. I wished she would have focused on me that intently.

"He should be doing fine," I replied, just as quiet. "The moon is still almost full, and the stars are shining brightly. Even if his night-vision isn't amazing yet, he still has plenty of light." In retrospect, maybe the forest was _too_ brightly lit.

Dawnpelt hummed in response, and shifted her weight on her paws. Our pelt accidently brushed and I had to bite to tongue to keep my startled _mrrow_ silent. On the other paw, Dawnpelt had jumped, and then muttered a hasty apology.

I studied her for a moment, and then suddenly pushed her. She nearly toppled over and shot me a glare. "Watch it!" she hissed.

In response, I shoved her again.

"Crowfrost!" she hissed again, although I noticed the amusement the sparked in her eyes. I smirked and went to shove her a third time, but this time she was prepared. She sidestepped agily and then flashed me a triumphant look. Before I could think of some cocky remark she lunged for me, and knocked me onto the ground.

From that point on it was war. We aimed at each other's muzzles with swift strikes, and darted to and fro. I batted at her ears and she swiped a pile of frosted pine needles at my face. We were both purring, and our faces were lit as brightly as the moon.

"Um, what am I supposed to do now?" Hailpaw's confused question interrupted our game.

My head shot up and my pale eyes widened; I'd forgotten all about him! Considering Dawnpelt's startled expression she did too.

"Uh, good job, Hailpaw," she mewed. "You found us quickly."

The young tom's features were morphed into a puzzled expression. "It wasn't very hard. You were making a lot of noise."

 _Snarky little kit,_ I thought darkly. Outwardly I mustered an expression of approval. "You did well for your first night, but I don't want to push it. We'll end on a high note tonight, and then pick back up tomorrow."

The only response I received from Hailpaw was a shrug of his shoulders, as if that was fine by him. He looked curiously at Dawnpelt, and then started walking towards the camp.

"I should walk with him," she murmured, and then padded off after him. I watched her creamy-colored pelt disappear into the night. Inside my chest an emotion kin to jealousy was building. I shook my head in an effort to chase off the notion.

 _I have no reason to be jealous of my apprentice. No reason at all._

Although, I couldn't deny the fact that I wished Dawnpelt were walking alongside me, and not Hailpaw. And I couldn't deny the fact that lately I'd longed for her constant presence, and my temper flared when she spent time with Spikefur.

I couldn't deny the fact that, even though I hated to share a nest with my flings or former mates, I'd purposely baited Dawnpelt into sharing a nest with me. I couldn't deny the fact that I enjoyed it.

I certainly couldn't deny the fact that Dawnpelt was gorgeous, intelligent, and confident. I couldn't deny the fact that I was attracted to her.

I couldn't deny the fact that the more time I spent with Dawnpelt, the less I thought about Shimmerpelt. The more time I spent with Dawnpelt the less I thought about _any_ she-cat.

I couldn't deny the fact that I constantly wanted to make Dawnpelt smile and laugh. I wanted to be the reason there was always a gleam in her eyes. I wanted to be her hero. I wanted to be the reason she woke up every morning, and went to sleep feeling wanted every night. I wanted to challenge her, and in turn I wanted her to challenge me. I wanted her to be mine...

 _You've been running away from this realization for far too long, Crowfrost, but no one can run forever. It's time for you to face the facts and accept their truth; the facts don't lie._

The facts? The truth? I wanted to laugh dryly, because I was too deep in now to back out. I had no choice but to accept the fact.

The fact was that somehow, along this crazy thing called life, I'd fallen in love with Dawnpelt.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **When do you think Crowfrost started to fall for Dawnpelt, and vice versa? Not the moment that they both admitted it to themselves, but the moment their feelings started to develop? (If you can't think of the specific moment, name the chapter!)**

 **#I'll save this one for the trivia at the end of the book. I don't want my answer to influence yours!**

* * *

 **I got a lot of PMs since my last update, demanding to know if I'd gone on hiatias. The answer is no, I've just been very busy. I wrapped up summer vacation and my first day of school was today. With that being said, I love receiving PMs from you guys and will answer any questions you have, but please don't PM me and ask if DF is on hiatias. It won't be, and even if it was, I would say so in the summery :)**

 **Moving on, this chapter was a bit challenging, but it was still fun to write. I've been planning the scene with Ferretclaw for ages, and Jayfeather's finally a ShadowClan kitty (temporarily, anyways)! Plus he brought along a companion: Blossomfall! Out of curiosity, did anyone think that I was going to choose Cherryleaf instead?**

 **And finally, maybe the most important part of this chapter, DAWNPELT AND CROWFROST ACKNOWLEDGED THEIR FEELINGS! Finally! After twelve chapters, they've finally been forced to accept the truth :) In all honesty, that wasn't supposed to happen. But I was writing the first scene with Dawnpelt and Crowfrost and it just _flowed_ ; there was no way I could erase it. I realized I liked the direction I was going in, and then it just seemed right for Crowfrost to acknowledge his feelings too. Now they just have to confess it to _each other._**

 ** _HOWEVER._ DF isn't finished yet - I'd say there's roughly six to seven chapters yet. I still have a lot of drama waiting to be played out! **

**For those of you who don't know, I'm still running the poll contest on my profile! The next set was just updated :)**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	13. Moments Come Together to Create a Story

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did then Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

* * *

 **Chapter Thirteen - Moments Come Together to Create a Story**

* * *

 **"This moment will be just another story someday." - The Perks of Being a Wallflower**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

Okay, so I was in love with him.

That wasn't… _such_ a bad thing, was it? I mean it was understandable in the very least, right? To my knowledge, every single she-cat had entertained a crush on Crowfrost at some point or another. The only she-cats that _might_ be exempt from the notion were Tawnypelt and Honeypaw. And Kinkfur, but that was a given; apparently she didn't even like him enough to raise him as her son.

Moreover, there were several she-cats from the _other Clans_ that also had feelings for the handsome deputy. And I was willing to bet that Crowfrost had charmed a couple loners and kittypets in his lifetime.

So, in all actuality, it would be more strange if I _wasn't_ in love with Crowfrost.

And those she-cats - the ones who fancied Crowfrost - they all eventually moved on. They accepted the fact that he would never love them, and they left him in their past. They went on to live lives as respected warriors, and then take on a new mate. Some of them even had kits with their mate. They were _happy_.

And yet… there was a desperate feeling in my chest that told me that I would never be happy with a tom that wasn't Crowfrost.

I banished that thought from my mind, and continued pacing the camp. _No, no that's ridiculous. I was happy before I developed feelings for Crowfrost, therefore my happiness is not dependent on him._ The feeling in my chest intensified, almost painfully. I cringed and hurriedly added, _Of course, I don't need to take on a mate at all. Look at Ivytail - she's a senior warrior, and she's never had a mate (Crowfrost doesn't count) or kits._

 _On the other paw… what if she's still in love with Crowfrost, and that's the reason she never took another mate after him?_

Great StarClan, what if I was doomed?

I stopped my pacing and inhaled a breath of air. The air was cold and chilly and tasted faintly of snow, and it helped to clear my head. _I am_ _ **not**_ _doomed, I 'm just in love. But it'll pass. One day I'll wake up, look across at Crowfrost, and realize that all my feelings towards him have dissolved. I'll view him only as a close friend, and I'll be happy._

The gut-wrenching feeling in my chest warned otherwise.

 _What else am I supposed to do?_ I wanted to snap. _Crowfrost doesn't return my affections; to him, I'm just a close friend. I would know if he was in love with me, and besides, he practically told me he wasn't._

My heart thudded painfully against my chest as I remembered his words. " _Don't let.. whatever that moment was, change the way you view me and you. I swear, it didn't mean anything."_

Suddenly my head became so heavy I barely had to strength to lift it. Crowfrost really didn't love me.

Tears began to well in my eyes, but I gritted my teeth and stubbornly blinked them away. He wasn't going to make me cry again. He didn't deserve my tears. _I was stronger than that._

And it wasn't as if Crowfrost had led me on. While he may have done that to several she-cats in the past, after we formed a truce, Crowfrost had only shown me friendship. We may have had our share of moments - moments that the local she-cats would _kill for_ \- but he didn't intend for me to read into them. He cared for me, and he expressed that care. It was my fault for falling for him.

 _But… some of those moments…_ I tried not to dwell on them, but some of them contradicted my statement. While some of them may only have formed out of friendship, others were simply unnecessary. Yesterday afternoon, we didn't _have_ to share a nest. And we didn't _have_ to lay so close together, and he didn't _have_ to groom my pelt. Not only were those moments completely voluntary, but they were all instigated by him.

 _Is it possible that he-NO! Stop thinking about it, Dawnpelt! You'll only hurt yourself!_

No, I was _already_ hurt. I was already hurt, confused, and I wanted answers. If Crowfrost didn't harbor any romantic affections towards me then why did those moments even exist?

 _What if you can't handle his response? What if there's a perfectly reasonable explanation behind every single one of them, and you get your hopes up for nothing?_

Then my hopes would fall to the ground like a broken bird, and eventually, I would learn how to fly again.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

Okay, so I was in lo-... okay, so I had a crush on her.

 _I tried to tell you._

 _Shut-up!_

Now that _that_ had been established, my next question was simple: what was I going to do about it? Was I going to confront Dawnpelt about my feelings, or was I going to leave her be and move on? The question may have been simple but the answer definitely was not.

 _Of course it's simple!_ My conscious snapped. _You like her, so you peruse her! That's how this works!_

 _No, it isn't that simple. I… I've never felt this way before._ Up until I finally admitted it to myself last night, I wasn't even sure if love existed. Lust and infatuation? I was an expert on both of those emotions, and they were both very, _very_ real. But love? _Real, true, pure love_? It was one of those things that sounded too good to be true.

But then I realized that I liked Dawnpelt, and the she-cat had to go and ruin everything.

That is, if what I was feeling was _actually_ love, and not just another level of lust or infatuation.

 _If I do pursue Dawnpelt, I would have to be faithful to only her. There would be no more flings, no other she-cats. It would just be Dawnpelt._

The thought… wasn't as horrible as I expected it to be. Actually, it wasn't horrible at all.

I swear, my conscious chuckled. _Haven't you realized it yet, Crowfrost? These feelings for Dawnpelt didn't just appear out of thin air. They've been developing for quite some time. You haven't really had the desire to maintain your flings ever since they sprouted roots in your heart._

 _What about Shimmerpelt?_ I challenged.

 _If I recall correctly, the reason you even began meeting with Shimmerpelt was because of Dawnpelt. And during the Gathering didn't you think that she was losing her appeal?_

Oh. _Oh._

Oh my StarClan, it had a point.

 _Well… what if the desire returns? What if, after I make things official with Dawnpelt, I realize that I'm just not 'mate' material? I mean, this is Rowanstar's daughter we're talking about, I won't be able to just dump her! He might demote me to an average warrior again!_

 _I can't believe you're more concerned over your position in the Clan than, say, what if Dawnpelt doesn't return your affections?_

I scoffed. _Because I don't have to worry about that. Of course Dawnpelt likes me! And if she doesn't already then it's not like I'll have much of a problem getting her to fall for me; I'm_ _ **Crowfrost**_ _, after all._

 _Oh, of course, however could I forget? It's not like I live in your head or anything._

 _Speaking of that, I really wish you would find a new head to live in; I'm kinda at my limit with all your sass. Go live in Ferretclaw's head; he's got plenty of space!_

 _I don't think you understand the point of having a conscious. But we're getting off track; what are you going to do about Dawnpelt?_

I flicked an ear. _What indeed?_

I didn't _have_ to do anything. If I wanted to, I could just continue on with my player ways. Maintain my flings, break hearts. It was a good life, and one that I thoroughly enjoyed.

But on the other paw… I had no desire to do any of that anymore. If I tried hard enough the desire might return, or I would just make myself miserable. It wasn't that I was _dying_ to take on a mate, I just… I just wanted Dawnpelt. And the simple fact was, if one day she and Spikefur padded happily into camp, tails intertwined, I wasn't sure I would be able to keep myself from raking my claws down his face.

I heaved a heavy, ragged sigh. _I guess that decides it, then. If I can't handle seeing Dawnpelt with another tom, then I need to do something about it._

 _I need to tell her how I feel about her._

 **Dawn Frost**

One realization led to another; just _how_ was I supposed to tell Dawnpelt I lo- _liked_ her?

Should I make a romantic scene out of it? Find a clearing in the forest, arrange some pine cones, and then have someone send her to find me? When she arrived at the clearing I could jump down from a pine tree and give her a declaration of undying love.

Or should I go ahead and make our status known to everyone in camp? I could scale the Tall Boulder, call the Clan together, and then ask her to be my mate in front of the entire Clan. Or, better yet, I could wait until the next Gathering and _then_ ask her! _That_ would keep those ruthless toms at bay!

Did I have to ask her at all? Could I just go ahead and start behaving like a mate? Dawnpelt was intelligent, she would catch on sooner or later.

 _No, no, and no,_ my conscious said, blandly. _Dawnpelt wouldn't want you to make a show out of things. This is supposed to be special. Why can't you just… you know, tell her you love her?_

I wrinkled my nose at the suggestion. _Just_ _ **tell her**_ _? Are you_ _**trying**_ _to get me rejected? No, my declaration has to dazzle her! It has to be incredible!_

My conscious didn't respond. Most likely he'd given up trying to be helpful.

"Now," I mused aloud, "I wonder how I should position the pine cones…"

 **Dawn Frost**

Turns out, pine cones weren't very easy to position. The rolled around and were uncomfortable to hold in my jaws. But what else was I supposed to do? This display had to be beautiful! It had to take Dawnpelt's breath away!

 _Of course,_ I reasoned, _it's beauty won't even compare to hers._ A moment later I realized exactly what I'd thought, and I gave my head a quick shake. The sappy smile faded from my lips and my face was masked with a dry expression. _StarClan, what's wrong with me?_

 _It's called love, Crowfrost,_ my conscious said, dreamily.

I swallowed my saliva in an attempt to dampen my throat. _Love._ I was possibly in love, and with Dawnpelt of all she-cats! _That's going to take some getting used to…_

I returned to my task, and tried to position a pine cone on it's side. It'd already covered the marshy ground in pine needles, so that when Dawnpelt finally found me she would have somewhere warm to sit. There were a few smooth, frost-covered stones as well. I planned on placing some fresh-kill on those, so that we wouldn't have to return to camp for a meal.

I'd gone and gathered several pine cones, and I was _trying_ to position those in a circle around the clearing. However, as previously stated, my attempts thus far were fruitless. I bent down to pick one up in my jaws, and ended up spitting it out when one of its spikes stabbed my tongue. I looked ruefully at the mess of pine cones at my paws and huffed. Sometimes it was _really_ hard being me.

"Crowfrost? What are you doing?"

My eyes widened and I spun around, horrified when I came face to face with Dawnpelt. The creamy-colored she-cat was observing the clearing with confusion written on her features. "What _is_ this mess?" she asked.

"Hey!" I cried, offended. "It's not a mess! It's just not finished yet!"

Dawnpelt blinked. "You mean _you_ did this? Why?" I opened my jaws, a clever lie on the tip of my tongue, when the hazel-eyed she-cat shook her head and said, "Never mind, I don't really care. I need to talk to you."

I considered making a joke or responding with some sort of sarcastic retort, but the seriousness in Dawnpelt's hazel eyes made me stop. Something was bothering her.

"Sure," I meowed, as I took a step towards her. "What's the matter?"

"It's just…" she trailed off, confliction evident on her features. Then her head snapped up and she asked, "Why did you save me from drowning?"

To say I was caught off guard was an understatement. "Uh, what?"

Dawnpelt kneaded the ground with her paws, a mixture of impatience and hesitance. "At the Gathering, when I fell off the land-bridge-"

"I know what you're talking about - I've only saved you from drowning _once._ _I mean_ why are you asking?"

Her impatience seemed to be overriding her hesitance. "I just want to know why, okay?" she snapped.

I shot her a hard look; she was lying, and it was painfully obvious. But she was more likely to tell me her motives if I answered her, so I shrugged and meowed, "I've already told you why: for the glory."

"That's it?" she pressed. "That's the _only reason_?"

"Dawnpelt, what do you want me to say?" I demanded. "I hated you, remember?"

I hated the way I was speaking to her. I hated this entire conversation. Something was clearly bothering her but she wouldn't tell me what, instead she was asking meaningless questions that only served to frustrate me. I wanted to be able to help her, but I had no idea what she expected me to say. ' _Because I was madly in love with you.'_? Was that it?

"Okay, whatever," Dawnpelt huffed. "What about-... whenever I was depressed, why did you drag me to see Littlecloud?"

"Because Rowanstar was convinced that you were sick," I immediately responded. "He was going to go himself, but I was afraid that if you two got to talking, you would tell him that I was the one who upset you. I wasn't willing to risk my position like that."

Dawnpelt looked like I had just struck her. "You-... you mean you didn't do that because you were worried about me?" Before I could reply, she shook her head and continued. "Fine. Why were you so determined to help me get over my fear of the dark?"

I scoffed. "Because you're a ShadowClan warrior! What ShadowClan warrior is scared of the dark?"

Slowly, I watched as hurt began to mask Dawnpelt's pretty features. She swallowed, and her eyes started to glisten with unshed tears. The fur along my spine bristled; somehow I was saying the wrong things, but it was the truth! Did she want me to lie to her?

"Dawnpelt," I started, almost pleadingly, "What do you want me to say? Tell me and I'll say it!"

She shook her head slowly, as if in a trance. "Don't worry about it," she murmured, meekly. "It doesn't matter anyways; I was wrong."

She spun around and started to march out of the clearing, but I wasn't about to let her leave me hanging like that. I dashed after her, and then skidded to a stop so that I blocked her path. "Dawnpelt!" I exclaimed. "What's bothering you?"

"Nothing!" she hissed, as she tried to swerve around me. I copied her movements so that she couldn't get passed me. She lowered her head and growled, "Move!"

"Not until you tell me what's bothering you!" I responded fiercely.

Her head shot up, and I was taken back when I noticed just how brightly her eyes burned. She was furious and devastated at the same time, and the realization made my heart ache. "What-"

"I thought you liked me!" she finally snapped. "I thought you liked me as more than just a close friend! I thought you- I thought _I_ -..." she trailed off, as a whimper crept past her lips. Her eyes were still gleaming with unshed tears.

" _I thought you liked me"? If she's so upset, then that must mean…_ my thoughts trailed off as an overwhelming grin slowly played across my lips. She liked me.

I mean, of course she did because I was amazing, but… _Dawnpelt liked me_!

However the creamy-colored she-cat couldn't see the celebration I was throwing inside my mind, and she interpreted my joyful grin as something else. "If you're just going to mock me then move!" she snarled, and tried to squeeze past me.

I sidestepped again and exclaimed, "Dawnpelt, I'm not mocking you! I lo-" abruptly I stopped, unable to get the word out. Did I really love Dawnpelt? I mean, _really_ _love_ her? That was a big, bold statement, especially for someone who wasn't totally sure that such a pure emotion even existed. But now Dawnpelt was staring at me, her expression a beautiful mixture of disbelief and hesitant hope. So I tried to pick up from where I started and said, "I do like you; I like you a lot. More than a close friend. I lo-"

 _I love you,_ was on the tip of my tongue, but I hesitated. I said I liked Dawnpelt as something more that a close friend, and that was the honest truth. Did I really need to go on? After all, she didn't say she loved me.

But as it turned out, Dawnpelt didn't need to hear those three words. What I'd already said was enough. Her eyes widened, first with shock and then delight, and then she practically threw herself at me. I nearly stumbled and fell, but I regained my balance just in time. Dawnpelt buried her face in my chest and purred loudly, and slowly a genuine smile appeared on my features. I nuzzled the top of her head, and then sighed, happily.

 _I don't have to tell her I love her just yet. Why not wait a few more days, just to make sure?_ _After all, what's the rush?_

 **Dawn Frost**

"Favorite color?"

Dawnpelt tilted her head to the side for a moment, as she studied the stars in the silverpelt above. Then she answered, "Orange. Like the color of the sunset, or the forests in leaf-fall. What about you?"

I didn't even hesitate. "Hazel. As in, the color of your eyes."

Dawnpelt shot me a lopsided smirk. "I bet you use that line on all the pretty she-cats."

"Ah, but see, you're not _pretty_ ; you're _gorgeous_. Therefore you get your own, special set of sappy lines."

A brief look of agitation passed over the ShadowClan she-cat's features. "You know, I'm not _just_ pretty-"

"You mean _gorgeous_ -"

"-I'm intelligent too," she finished.

"The most intelligent," I agreed. "Along with the most talented, the most naturally gifted, the most fiery-"

She leaned into my side and laughed, and I stopped speaking just so I could listen to it. She had the most wonderful laughter. "Point taken," she meowed. "I'm just perfect, aren't I?"

"Not quite, but you're close. However _I'm_ absolutely perfect."

Dawnpelt hummed, and the sound reverberated deep in her chest. "Of course you are."

 **Dawn Frost**

"You know we have to tell them eventually," I murmured, as I pretended to groom my pelt. Dawnpelt laid beside me, stretched out in an attempt to catch some of the sun's morning rays. Our Clanmates swarmed around us, some headed to the fresh-kill pile while those who'd stayed up all night disappeared into the dens to catch some sleep.

"I know," Dawnpelt replied, quietly. I risked a glance at her and noticed that her features had twisted into an expression of deep thought. "But… not yet."

"Don't tell me that you're embarrassed of me," I teased.

I expected some sort of retort back, but instead Dawnpelt shook her head, completely serious. "It's nothing like that, and you know it. I just… I don't want our status to be common knowledge yet. Right now, this is our secret. _Ours_." She lifted her head and met my gaze, pleadingly. "Can't we keep it that way for just awhile longer?"

Her hazel eyes were deep and so full of expression, the leaf-bare sun could've melted me right there on the soggy marsh. It really wouldn't have taken much; all Dawnpelt had to do was _pout_ , and I would cave to her every wish.

"Sweetheart, I would bring you the moon if you asked me to," I murmured, before I leaned forward to place a swift lick on her nose. "We can keep it our secret for as long as we want."

Dawnpelt's response wasn't as bold as mine; not while we sat in the center of camp. But the secretive way she twined our tails together told me all it needed to.

 **Dawn Frost**

"Ugh, I _hate_ snow," I mumbled bitterly, as the white flakes started to fall from of the pale gray sky.

"It's not _that_ bad," Dawnpelt remarked, lazily. At the moment we were strolling through the pine forest, pelts pressed together and tails lovingly intertwined, away from the prying eyes of our Clanmates.

I shot Dawnpelt a doubtful glance. "Name _one thing_ snow is good for."

The she-cat paused, her expression thoughtful. I awaited her response with about as much enthusiasm as a dead toad. I knew she wouldn't be able to think of anything; snow, and really just the leaf-bare season in general, was absolutely useless.

Suddenly Dawnpelt's eyes lit up. "I've got it!" she exclaimed. "Snow is _perfect_ for _this_!"

Before I could ask for her to elaborate, I was hit in the face with a pawful of StarClan-forsaken, cold, white snow.

"Dawnpelt!" I cried, annoyed. She laughed as I shook my head desperately, thoroughly annoyed. "That isn't funn-" another pawful of snow interrupted me, and another bout of bright laughter followed it.

"That's it," I growled lowly. "This is _war_!" I let out a loud caterwaul and then barreled into my mate - _my mate!_ \- and knocked her onto the ground. She gasped in surprise, and squirmed uncomfortably with her back pressed against the freezing snow.

"Surrender!" I demanded.

Dawnpelt's hazel eyes narrowed playfully. "Never!" she returned. She reached forward at batted at my ears with her paws and I let out a discouraged hiss before I jumped off of her.

"Just wait until I get my paws on you!"

"You'll have to catch me first!" she retorted, and then quick as lightning she spun around and darted deeper into the pine forest. Thrilled with the prospect of a chase, I grinned and raced after her.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

I couldn't force the smile off of my lips as I padded into the camp, despite the fact that I was completely covered in snow and I couldn't feel my paws. Ever since Crowfrost and I became mates, it seemed like there was very little that could keep me from smiling.

Crowfrost was… we were… I couldn't recall the last time I'd ever felt so happy.

At the moment my mate - _my mate!_ \- was checking in with the fox-guards, and had told me to go on to camp without him. I'd been hesitant to leave his side for even a moment, but we were trying to avoid suspicion. And since we'd starting taking Hailpaw out at night, there wasn't much of a reason for us to spend so much time together during the daylight hours.

The camp was a far cry from peaceful, as my Clanmates continued to prepare for the harsher, colder weather that leaf-bare promised. The elders had been mumbling about a blizzard that sat on the horizon (much to Crowfrost's horror), and it seemed to have inspired the Clan. Warriors that weren't on hunting patrols were enforcing the camp walls for better protection from the bitter wind; apprentices were gathering extra moss and feathers to ensure that the nests stayed warm.

My smile only widened as I watched the Clan come together and work efficiently, with one common goal in mind. I hoped Blossomfall and Jayfeather were taking notes; _this_ was how you got work done.

However my smile faltered when I noticed a lone tortoiseshell cat, who sat alone in a corner of camp. Concerned, I padded towards her.

"Hey," I cheerfully greeted Olivenose, whose head lifted at the sound of my voice. I sat down beside my best friend and asked, "How come you're all alone?"

Olivenose shrugged. "I don't really feel like socializing right now…"

" _You_ don't feel like socializing?" I snorted. "That's funny. Now, what's really bothering…" I trailed off when Olivenose's features remained twisted in their forlorn expression. "Olivenose? What happened?"

The green-eyed she-cat sighed, depressed. "Dawnpelt, I'm such a horrible cat."

"No you're not!" I immediately protested.

But Olivenose shook her head, convinced. "No, I am. I… Owlclaw asked me to be his mate, and I said no."

My heart started to sink deep inside my chest. "He asked you-?"

She nodded, sadly. "This morning, right after the dawn patrols left camp. He said he needed to talk to me, and once we were alone, he said that he was in love with me. And I… I told him I didn't feel the same way." Olivenose raised her bright green gaze so that she was staring into my eyes. "I really like Owlclaw, but only as a _friend_! And I know that we spend a lot of time together, but I-I thought Owlclaw knew that!" She lowered her gaze again. "I feel absolutely horrible, but… what was I supposed to do? I don't love Owlclaw, I love _Crowfrost_."

" _... I love Crowfrost."_ I had to control my features to keep from wincing. Olivenose didn't love Crowfrost. She was _infatuated_ with him, there was a difference! She didn't _really_ know him anyways. Sure, he had been her mentor, but did she know his favorite color? Did she know his favorite kind of prey, or his favorite season? Did she know about his fear of being alone? Did she know that it stemmed from a tragic kithood?

No, she didn't. _I_ did.

 _I_ was his mate!

It wasn't until then that the truth really struck me. I was mates with the tom whom my best friend had had a crush on ever since she was an apprentice. She'd been padding after him for countless moons, thinking of him and dreaming of their shared future.

And I had fallen in love with him and taken him as my mate.

"Oh, Olivenose," I breathed, as I pressed my pelt against hers. She leaned into my side and buried her face in my chest, and only then did I realize that she was shivering.

"I'm a horrible friend," she cried softly into my fur, her words muffled.

"No you're not," I whispered, and rasped my tongue soothingly over her ear. "You're _not_ a horrible friend."

 _I am._

 **Dawn Frost**

Days passed and the guilt that I'd felt ever since my conversation with Olivenose constantly gnawed at my heart. She was refusing toms because she was infatuated with Crowfrost; she was refusing to move on because she was infatuated with my mate.

 _I have to tell her, soon,_ I thought. _Even if we don't tell the rest of the Clan at the same time, Olivenose deserves to know the truth. I can't let her yearn for a tom who will never return her affections._

 _But… not yet._ I wasn't a fool; I knew that as soon as I informed Olivenose of my new relationship with Crowfrost, she would feel betrayed, hurt, and furious. I wasn't ready for her to hate me yet. _Soon, just not right now._

"Whatcha thinking about?" Crowfrost asked, as he smoothed his tongue over my back.

"Nothing," I quickly replied. "Don't worry about it."

Crowfrost paused his grooming to look me in the eye. "Dawnpelt," he started cautiously, "you know that you can tell me anything, right? And out here in the middle of the territory, no one will overhear you."

I forced a smile. "Of course I know that, lizard-brain. Seriously, don't worry about it. It isn't important."

Crowfrost studied my features for a heartbeat longer before he shrugged, and resumed his work. I sighed, content, and allowed my eyelids to flutter.

 _I'll tell her eventually. Just… not while I'm so happy._

 **Dawn Frost**

"Do you think StarClan picks favorites?"

I glanced curiously at my mate, but his gaze was trained solely on the silverpelt above our heads. Slowly, I followed his gaze, as if I would find the inspiration behind his question in the stars. "Picks favorites?" I echoed.

Crowfrost nodded. "Yeah, like… do you think they watch over certain cats more diligently, or they bless certain cats more than others?"

A frown played across my lips. "I guess I never thought about it. But… they would have to, wouldn't they? I mean I doubt any StarClan warriors were throwing blessings at Tigerstar or Brokenstar."

The ShadowClan deputy hummed in response, and then, for a few moments, there was silence. We were perched in a pine tree as we waited for Hailpaw to find us. I expected the gray tom to appear at any second; he'd grown to be quite the tracker, much to my relief. It was about time Hailpaw found something that he excelled in.

Finally the curiosity became too much, and I glanced at my mate again. "That was a strange question. Why did you ask it?"

Crowfrost shrugged. "It was just a thought I had the other day, and I've been thinking about it ever since." Very slowly, I watched as his frosty-blue orbs drifted from the silverpelt. "It doesn't seem very fair, but I don't understand how StarClan _couldn't_ choose favorites. Not when there are cats that can't seem to catch a break, and then there are cats like _me_."

I scoffed, although there was no venom behind the action. "You think you're one of StarClan's favorites? Of course, _you would_ think that." Honestly, I wasn't surprised in the slightest.

But when I glanced back at Crowfrost I was caught off guard; he seemed to have settled his gaze on something in the distance. His features were schooled into an expression of seriousness. _What's going through his head?_ If I had a blue-tailed lizard for every time I wondered that, I would never be hungry again.

"I'm ridiculously handsome and popular," he finally meowed, and I found myself resisting the urge to roll my eyes. "I'm the deputy of ShadowClan, the best Clan by the lake. I'm surrounded by cats who would jump off of a cliff if I asked them to. I have Scorchfur, who's my best friend and keeps me on the straight and narrow, and I have Smokefoot, who's my brother and the reason I'm even alive. And now…" he trailed off, and his gaze settled on me. "And now I have the most perfect she-cat in the world as my mate, and I'm just so happy that I-..." he trailed off again and shook his head, at a loss for words.

That was perfectly fine, for I had reached that point moments ago myself.

"Crowfrost," I whispered.

The handsome tom raised his gaze, and frosty-blue met warm hazel. "I've never been so happy in my entire life," he murmured. "And it's all thanks to you."

I leaned forward so that I could bury my head in Crowfrost's chest. I inhaled, and my eyes fluttered shut as his familiar, comforting scent washed over my senses. He smelled like the pine forest that was so dear to him, and of the frost and wind and snow…

" _Crowfrost_ …"

He rasped his tongue over my ear and I couldn't contain the drowsy purr that reverberated deep within my chest. He nuzzled my cheek, and then pressed his muzzle against my ear. His voice was deliciously husky as he meowed, "Dawnpelt, I… I lov-"

" _Found you_!" A sudden exclamation rang through the chilly air like thunder. Crowfrost and I jumped apart and spun around, only to come face to face with our apprentice. Either Hailpaw didn't notice that we'd been cuddling or he simply didn't care, because his face was practically glowing with triumph. "I think my beat my best record!"

I shot Crowfrost a swift glance, and noted that my mate looked ready to slaughter the young tom for interrupting us. Acting quickly before he could do just that, I tried to mask my disappointment with enthusiasm and exclaimed, "I think you did too, Hailpaw! That's great!"

Hailpaw puffed his chest out, proudly. "Cloverpaw still isn't a very good tracker, and neither are Ratscar or Pinenose. I'm the best in the family!"

My false enthusiasm slowly became genuine, as I gazed at the blue-eyed apprentice. He looked so proud of himself, it was such a sharp contrast to the neutral mask he typically wore. Ever since he'd gotten the hang of tracking, it seemed like he was displaying more emotion. He even seemed to have finally warmed up to Crowfrost, although the feeling wasn't mutual _quite yet_.

Speaking of Crowfrost… I nudged him sharply in the ribs when he still hadn't praised Hailpaw for his record. The sleek black tom growled softly before meowing through gritted teeth, "Great job, Hailpaw. I'm proud of you."

His words were void of any pride or warmth whatsoever, but Hailpaw soaked the praise up anyways. His dark blue eyes gleamed brightly underneath the light of the silverpelt. "Thanks," he meowed warmly.

The light gray tom turned around and started climbing down the pine tree. I swallowed a sigh of disappointment before following him, with Crowfrost right behind me. We walked a tail length behind Hailpaw, allowing him to lead the way back to camp. "I can't wait to tell Ashpaw," he purred. "She bet me I couldn't beat my record!"

"Oh," Crowfrost mumbled underneath his breath, "so I have _Ashpaw_ to thank for his interruption."

I flicked Crowfrost with my tail as sort of a warning; he didn't respond. We continued the walk back to camp in silence, only the tips of our tails touching, just in case Hailpaw happened to glanced back. I wished we didn't have to be so secretive about our relationship; aside from Smokefoot and Scorchfur, absolutely no one knew that Crowfrost and I were mates.

I supposed that we could come out and make the announcement whenever we wanted to, but… there would be so many complications with just strolling into camp and telling our Clanmates. Before we informed the whole Clan I wanted to tell Olivenose, my parents, and Tigerheart first. They were family, and didn't deserve to find out with the rest of the Clan. I felt like I should also update Spikefur as well; it was clear that he had feelings for me. It would be cruel to not give him a warning, and leave him astounded along with the rest of ShadowClan.

I had already selfishly toyed with his feelings, the least I could do was be honest with him and give him a bit of a warning. He _deserved_ it.

Crowfrost disagreed, but Crowfrost was my mate, not my Clan leader. I told him that if he didn't like it then he could go chase that rabbit of his, for all I cared. He hadn't responded and hadn't brought the topic up since then; I had a feeling he was still bitter towards the foxes for killing the elusive rabbit.

 _Oh Crowfrost…_ I thought fondly, as I glanced at the tom beside me. His sleek black pelt blended almost seamlessly with the night. If it weren't for his paws and chest, I might not have noticed him at all.

I wasn't sure if Crowfrost caught my glance or if he simply wanted to me near me, but he pressed his pelt against mine and swiftly licked my cheek. It took every ounce of self-control that I possessed to not purr and attract Hailpaw's attention. Instead I allowed a small, blissful smile and kept my eyes trained on the worn path in front of us.

 _Do you think StarClan chooses favorites… It doesn't seem very fair, but I don't understand how StarClan_ _ **couldn't**_ _choose favorites… And now I have the most perfect she-cat in the world as my mate… I've never been so happy in my entire life, and it's all thanks to you… Dawnpelt, I-I lo-..._

I practically skidded to a halt right then.

Was Crowfrost trying to… before Hailpaw interrupted us, was Crowfrost trying to tell me that he _loved me_? Was his whole spiel about StarClans' favorites just the build-up to the confession that I never knew I would ever want? That I would want it so badly that sometimes, just thinking about it was enough to make my heart _ache_?

 _I-I lo-..._

That had to be it! Crowfrost had been about to tell me that he loved me!

Suddenly it felt like I was walking on air. My steps were light and I carried myself easily. I couldn't even feel the bitter leaf-bare wind anymore. I risked another glance at Crowfrost, whose gaze was still focused sternly on Hailpaw.

At that moment, I wanted nothing more than to tell Crowfrost that I loved him; I wanted to yowl it to the stars and the moon.

But… Crowfrost wasn't a typical tom. Although he hadn't said anything to me, I figured that he wasn't very comfortable with the idea of love just yet. He'd been with so many other she-cats before, it must have been difficult for him to accept that he loved me. I understood. It was because of that reason that I hadn't told him that I loved him either; I was waiting for him to say it first, so that he was completely comfortable with hearing it said back.

The idea of real, true, pure love must have meant a great deal to him. The fact that he had been prepared to say it to me tonight warmed me from the tip of my ears to the tip of my tail.

I couldn't help but glance at Crowfrost again, this time with a soft, affectionate smile.

 _I love you too, Crowfrost._

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **When is your birthday?**

 **#Yesterday! August 16th!**

* * *

 **SO, as the QotD states, yesterday was my birthday! It was an amazing day, one of my favorite birthdays yet! I was hoping so badly to get this chapter to you guys out yesterday, so we could sort of celebrate it together, but my family and friends threw me a HUGE surprise party, and I became sorta distracted… oppos...**

 **Moving on, Crowfrost and Dawnpelt are FINALLY mates! And it only took them thirteen chapters ;) I really love this chapter, and thankfully it was another *really* easy one. Unfortunately, if history repeats itself, that means the next three chapters are going to be excruciating…**

 **Anyway, don't think that just because Crowfrost and Dawnpelt are finally(!) mates that the story is over. I actually just finished outlining the rest of the story, and as long as I don't add anymore ideas or plots, there should be about seven more chapters (counting the epilogue, not counting the trivia page). So buckle down and get ready, because the story's not over yet! I still have one or two major plotlines to introduce!**

 **Now, I'm sure you all feel suppeeeerrrrrrrrrr guilty for not getting me a present for my birthday, but fear not! It's not too late to give me one, and I actually have something in mind: I would LOVE for this chapter to receive more than 32 reviews. On chapter nine we received exactly 32 reviews, the record for Dawn Frost. So please, your review doesn't have to be very long at all - just leave one! Just answer the QotD if you want! But I would love for this chapter to break the record :)**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	14. Do You Believe in Love?

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did then Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.**

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 **Chapter Fourteen - Do You Believe in Love?**

* * *

 **"Come on, come on, don't leave me like this! I thought I had you figured out. Something's gone terribly wrong, you're all I wanted." - Taylor Swift, Haunted**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

"What about Crowfrostkit? Is that an option?"

"Of course not," Scorchfur scoffed.

"Never," Snowbird agreed.

I huffed, exasperated. "Come on guys, _you_ asked _me_ for help naming your kits. Why are you rejecting every name I suggest?"

"Because I refuse to doom my kits before they're even born by giving them terrible names," Snowbird meowed, matter-of-factly.

I flashed the pretty white she-cat a glare. "Excuse you, but any kit would consider themselves blessed to be named after the most amazing ShadowClan warrior that ever existed!"

"Did I hear my name?" A new voice inquired.

I shot Smokefoot a confused glance when he sat down beside me. "No, we were talking about me."

The dark gray tom shrugged. "Nevermind then; I thought someone said "the most amazing ShadowClan warrior that ever existed"."

"Crowfrost did," Scorchfur meowed.

"Ah, so you _did_ call for me." Smokefoot looked at me through narrowed blue eyes. " _Liar._ "

I scoffed. "Lizard-brain, I said _we were talking about me_!"

"Um, _hello_ ," Snowbird interrupted us, "I thought we were trying to think of names for my kits!"

" _Our kits_ ," Scorchfur corrected her.

Smokefoot perked up. "Oh, I've got a good one! What about Smokefootkit?"

"If you name one Smokefootkit then you also have to name one Crowfrostkit," I added quickly.

" _No_!" Scorchfur and Snowbird exclaimed at the same moment.

"Besides," Scorchfur went on, "those are both tom names. What if we have a tom _and_ a she-kit?"

"Don't encourage them, Scorchfur," Snowbird warned.

Smokefoot ignored her and flicked his tail. "Psh, that's easy! You can name the tom Smokefootkit, and the she-kit Crowfrostkit. 'Crowfrost' sounds more like a she-cat name than a tom name anyways."

I nodded enthusiastically. "See, this could work! Just think about- _wait a second_!" I spun around and glared sharply at the smirking dark gray tom. " _What did you just say about my name_?!"

" _Ugh_ , I quit," Snowbird growled, as she stood to her paws and stormed into the nursery.

"Snowbird, love, come back!" Scorchfur called after her, his tone an impossible mixture of impatience and concern. When he didn't receive a response he groaned, "I'll talk to you guys later. Right now I have to talk my mate down before her hormones get the best of her and- _Snowbird_ , don't shred your nest! We _talked_ about this!"

I chuckled to myself as Scorchfur's tail disappeared into the nursery. "If those kits aren't born soon, I don't know what they'll do. At this point I-" I stopped when I glanced at Smokefoot, and noticed the solemn expression upon his features. He was staring at his paws, lost in thought, so different from the tom I'd just been laughing with.

"Hey," I murmured, and nudged his shoulder with my own. "You okay?"

The dark gray tom exhaled a heavy breath. "I need to talk to you."

I blinked. "Okay… start talking."

But Smokefoot shook his head. "Not here. It needs to be somewhere private."

"Well, has Jayfeather cleared you to leave camp?" I asked. "If the cold hasn't affected your lungs too badly yet, we could always go into the forest. Most of the warriors are in their nests right now anyways."

Smokefoot nodded absently, a faraway gleam in his dark blue eyes. "Yeah… yeah, c'mon. Lets go." Then, without checking to make sure I followed him, Smokefoot stood to his paws and padded towards the camp exit. After a heart-beat of hesitance, I followed him. The churning sensation in my stomach told me I wasn't going to like what he had to tell me.

 **Dawn Frost**

When Smokefoot and I usually went on a walk together, it was full of laughter and teasing remarks. We would shove each other into the pine trees. We would challenge each other. We would pretend to be apprentices again, and dare each other to do dumb things.

It was _painfully evident_ from the moment that Smokefoot looked at me with that gleam in his dark blue eyes, that this would not be one of those walks.

 _Whatever he has to say, be sure to keep an open mind about it,_ my conscious warned me. I didn't respond.

For awhile we just padded around the pine forest in silence. He was the one who needed to talk to me, so I planned on waiting for him to start the conversation. But instead Smokefoot acted like he was mute, and kept his jaws clamped shut. Finally, once it started to snow again and the silence became unbearable, I told him, "Smokefoot, I'm freezing and my paws are numb. Tell me why you dragged me out here or let me return to my nice nest and warm mate."

My words jerked Smokefoot to a halt, although it took a few more moments for him to say anything. When he finally did speak, he didn't say what I expected him to. "Do you remember the night that Kinkfur abandoned you in the snow?"

I was caught off guard, but intrigued. I shrugged and replied, "Of course I remember the night that old fleabag tried to murder me. Why?"

My wording seemed to amuse Smokefoot. For a second he smiled softly, as if thinking 'typical Crowfrost', but then that smile disappeared. "I convinced Whitewater to go after you. She found you, brought you back to camp, and adopted you. We became brothers."

"I like to think that we would have grown close even if I hadn't been on the edge of death," I meowed. My attempt at humor was wasted on the blue-eyed tom.

Instead he locked his gaze on my own, and said, "You know that I would do anything for you, right? That I would support you no matter what?"

I narrowed my frost-colored eyes. "You know that I do. Just like how I know you didn't bring me this deep into the forest to remind me of that. What's _really_ on your mind?"

Smokefoot looked away and instead focused on the pale gray sky above our heads. Snowflakes fell on his nose and then instantly melted. Finally he meowed, "I know how strongly you feel against this, but… Applefur and I are mates."

The fur along my spine bristled, and my tail lashed furiously. "You and Applefur are _what_?"

"Your hearing is perfectly fine, Crowfrost. You heard me the first time." He looked at me again, and I noticed that this time, his eyes were hard with a sort of determination. This wasn't a joke. He wasn't kidding. "Applefur and I are mates. I'm not asking you to like it, but as your friend and brother, I am asking you to accept it."

My eyes widened slightly. "Accept it? Smokefoot, she's a traitor! She trained in the Dark Forest!"

"Great StarClan, Crowfrost, how long are you going to hold onto that grudge," the dark gray tom growled. "Why does it matter that Applefur trained in the Dark Forest when she fought alongside the Clans in the end?"

"Because she could have prevented the battle!" I exclaimed.

My companion shook his head. "No, she couldn't have. When the Dark Forest announced their true intentions it was only days before the attack, there's no way-"

"Fine then, maybe she couldn't have prevented the battle," I interrupted him, "but if she had told Blackstar about the attack as soon as she found out about it, the Clans would have had longer to prepare themselves. Half of the Clan didn't even know there would be an attack until it was launched!"

Smokefoot scoffed. "Right, because Blackstar wouldn't have laughed in her face if she just strolled into his den and said, 'Oh hey Blackstar, I just thought you should know that Tigerstar is planning to attack the Clans. He's got an army, and I'm apart of it. Just thought you should know!'" His voice has swiftly grown louder, until he was practically shouting.

"Are you telling me that she was too _embarrassed_ to try and save the Clans?" I demanded.

"She was _afraid_!"

"Because she's a _coward_!" I snarled. "She's a traitor and a coward, and so is every single other warrior who trained in that StarClan-forsaken place!"

"She's _not_ a traitor," Smokefoot spat. "They tricked her! She didn't know what she was doing!"

I plastered a mockingly sweet smile across my lips. "So let me get this straight: Tigerstar appeared to her in a dream, along with several others, and told her that he felt guilty for trying to destroy us all those seasons ago, and wanted to correct his wrongs by making her a better warrior. And she _believed_ that?" I shook my head, disgusted. "So not only is your traitorous mate a coward, she's naive as well."

I raised my gaze until it locked with Smokefoot's; his dark blue eyes were positively burning with fury. Softly, tauntingly, I asked, "She's quite the catch, isn't she? Absolutely perfect for you."

Finally I'd pushed the dark gray tom too far. Smokefoot let out a furious caterwaul and then launched himself at me, paws extended. He bowled into my side and we both toppled onto the freezing, snow-covered marsh. The melted snow had made the marsh even wetter, and I gritted my teeth as it soaked into my sleek black pelt. _I. Hate. Leaf-bare!_

"Take that back!" Smokefoot snarled. "Take back every wrong thing you've ever said about Applefur!"

"I would _love to_ , brother," I retorted, "except everything I've ever said about that mouse-heart is true!"

Smokefoot shoved his muzzle forward so that it practically brushed against mine. His voice was _dangerously_ low as he growled, "I'll have you know that that " _mouse-heart"_ has been nothing short of the best mate ever for the _past three moons_!"

That struck a chord within me. Any witty retorts I had planned melted on the tip of my tongue, the same way that snowflakes melted when they touched the ground. There was no way I'd heard him right. _Smokefoot and Applefur have been together for three whole moons? No, no there's no way in StarClan that Smokefoot could keep such a huge secret from me for three moons._

I had been stunned into speechlessness, a rare sight to behold. I was so surprised that I completely forgot to school my features into an unreadable mask, and Smokefoot easily read my thoughts. His cobalt-colored orbs softened, as did his tone. "I didn't _want_ to keep it a secret from you," he murmured, "but Applefur and I were waiting for the right time to tell you."

My stupor slowly started to fade, and was swiftly replaced with cold fury. "Three moons?" I echoed, my words forced between gritted teeth. "You've been mates with that _traitor_ for _three whole moons_ , and you've not said _a word_ about it to me?"

Enmity sharpened his dark gaze once more. " _I said to stop calling her_ -" But a hard kick to his chest interrupted the dark gray tom, and while he was sent stumbling backwards I leapt to my paws.

"I told you about Dawnpelt as soon as we became mates!" I shouted, unable to keep the betrayal separate from my tone. "As soon as we-... did you tell anyone else about your relationship?" I demanded. "Does Scorchfur know? Or Owlclaw?"

Smokefoot, who'd just recovered from a coughing fit, glared at me. "Of course they don't know," he spat. "I wanted _my brother_ to be the first cat I told."

"Smokefoot, I'm touched," I meowed, as sarcastically as I could. "Really, I am."

The other warrior narrowed his eyes, and for a moment he studied me in silence. When he spoke again he said, "Applefur told me everything about her time in the Dark Forest; she's repented for her mistakes. Have you had this conversation with Dawnpelt?"

I snorted. "Of course not; _Dawnpelt_ didn't train in the Dark Forest. There's no reason for her to-"

"I wasn't talking about Dawnpelt," Smokefoot growled. "I was talking about _you_. Does Dawnpelt know that you lied to her when you said you haven't had any flings since you became deputy?"

My tail lashed furiously behind me, like an adder slithered through the tall grass. "Smokefoot," I warned him, my voice dangerously quiet, "if you value our relationship then you won't _dare_ go there."

My warning did little to unsettle the large gray tom. As a matter of fact it seemed to have the opposite effect on him. Smokefoot's eyes widened slightly, incredulously, and he demanded, "You mean you're allowed to antagonize _my mate_ , along with every other trainee, but when it comes _to you_ -"

"Shimmerpelt was just an outlet for me," I interrupted him. "She never meant anything to me."

"And you don't think that training in the Dark Forest was an outlet for some of the trainees?" Smokefoot exclaimed. "How are you any different from them?"

"Because _my outlet_ didn't try to destroy the Clans!"

"But it goes against the Warrior Code, doesn't it?" Smokefoot asked, although it was more of a statement than a question. "You still betrayed the Code. At least no Dark Forest trainee broke the Warrior Code!"

"Well thank StarClan for _that_ ," I snorted. "Sure, they trained alongside the Clans greatest enemies, but at least they didn't break the Code!"

Smokefoot tilted his head to the side, mockingly curious as he inquired, "I wonder what Dawnpelt would think of your lie? Something tells me she wouldn't handle it very well at all."

My claws dug into the snowy, soggy, marshy ground. "Don't you _dare_ bring this up with her," I snarled lowly. "As a matter of fact, don't say anything to her ever again. Don't _speak_ to her, don't _glance_ at her-"

"Only as long as you do the same with Applefur," Smokefoot growled.

In response, I pulled my lips back into a snarl. Sleek black fur bristled along my spine, and my posture was stiff was rage. Smokefoot's appearance mirrored mine. This dispute was finally winding down to an end, but so was our relationship. Every venomous word was like a fatal strike. We would never get past this moment. Never.

"I can't believe you're defending the cats that damaged your lungs," I whispered.

"Don't pretend like I'm the whole reason you hate them," Smokefoot retorted. "You would hold a grudge against a rat if it croaked like a frog; you hate the trainees because you didn't suspect their betrayal, not because they hurt me."

But didn't he understand that I wouldn't loath them _as much_ if he hadn't have been injured?

"Whitewater would be disappointed in you," I spat. It was my most shallow insult yet.

Smokefoot raised his head and looked me dead in the eye. "I suppose you know exactly what a mother's disappointment looks like, don't you?"

 **Dawn Frost**

The next few days were eventful. After our argument I stormed deeper into the territory, whilst Smokefoot returned to camp. I wasn't there to hear the announcement, but apparently Smokefoot and his _precious mate_ had told the Clan about their relationship. I asked Dawnpelt how the Clan handled the news, and she said that they were excited for the new couple, although Starlingwing seemed a bit depressed. Apparently he'd thought that Applefur was actually interested in him.

Smokefoot and I… we hadn't spoken to each other since the argument. It was almost like we had some unspoken agreement to pretend that the other didn't exist. We didn't share tongues anymore, and when we passed each other we made a point to not make contact. No more exchanging smirks, no more dumb, apprentice dares. No more pestering Scorchfur and no more racing through the territory.

I was miserable.

I missed Smokefoot. We'd grown up together, brothers that were separated only by blood. I would have never thought that we would come to this point, especially not over a she-cat.

But no matter how much I missed him, I wasn't going to apologize. I would stand by what I said. Applefur was a traitor to ShadowClan. She didn't deserve someone like Smokefoot. She didn't deserve anyone at all. Smokefoot would just have to learn that the hard way, and when he did, I would accept his apology. And then, everything would go back to normal.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

My lips had twisted into a concerned frown as I watched my mate assign warriors to patrols. He seemed to be making a point, as he ordered Applefur to join a dawn hunting patrol, led by several warriors who were younger than she was. Annoyance flared in Applefur's eyes, but it faded when Smokefoot pressed his muzzle against hers. He didn't even spare Crowfrost a glance, which only seemed to further aggravate him.

"I guess Crowfrost and Smokefoot are still ignoring each other, huh?" Spikefur mused aloud.

"It looks that way," I agreed.

The dark brown tom sighed. "StarClan, what I wouldn't give to know what happened between them. They were absolutely fine just a half-moon ago!"

I shot him a hard look. "That's not really any of your business, is it?" Of course Crowfrost had told me about the argument, and I was sure that Scorchfur and Applefur knew as well, but besides us no one else knew. They only knew that for the first time that anyone could remember, Crowfrost and Smokefoot were ignoring each other.

"Probably not," Spikefur admitted. "But… _still_! Aren't you the least bit curious-"

"Spikefur," Crowfrost called, "I want you to lead a hunting patrol near the ThunderClan border. Take whoever you want."

The amber-eyed warrior turned towards me. "Feel like joining me for a hunting-"

"Anyone except Dawnpelt," Crowfrost added.

Spikefur scoffed, incredulously, and I couldn't help but wonder if Crowfrost was _trying_ to alert the Clan of our secret relationship. But then again, it had become typical of Crowfrost to assign Spikefur to some task or another whenever he was in the middle of a conversation. Our Clanmates probably wouldn't pay the order very much attention.

"I'll go with you, Spikefur," Tigerheart offered, before he shot the deputy a pointed glare.

Crowfrost met his glare with a barely-concealed smirk. "Don't you mean that you _and Blossomfall_ will go with him, Tigerheart? Don't forget about your apprentice."

"I'm _not_ an apprentice," Blossomfall growled.

"Actually, by definition," Crowfrost started, although he was quickly interrupted by Ferretclaw.

The cream-and-gray warrior bounded towards Blossomfall, shoved his muzzle in her face and exclaimed, "How _dare_ you contradict Crowfrostypaws! If he says that you're an apprentice then you're an apprentice, and if he calls you a winged-squirrel then you'd better climb up and tree and take off flying!"

Crowfrost groaned aloud and Blossomfall took several steps backwards, her features wrinkled in an agitated expression. "Why are ShadowClan cats all so _strange_?" she demanded.

Tigerheart rolled his eyes and pushed past the ThunderClan she-cat. "Forget it," he snapped. "Just come with us on the stupid patrol."

"I'm not your apprentice," Blossomfall snapped, as she trailed after Spikefur and Tigerheart. "Stop bossing me around!"

Crowfrost watched the patrol exit the camp, vaguely amused, and then turned to look at Waspstripe. "I don't want to assemble another patrol, so can you and Starlingwing go hunting together? Just the two of you?"

"Actually Crowfrost," Waspstripe started, somewhat sheepishly, "Grassheart and I planned on going on a walk. Sorry," he apologized, as Grassheart appeared by his side.

Irritation settled on my mate's features. "Seriously? You can't catch a few frogs while you're out?"

Ferretclaw's eyes brightened. "Oh, oh, Crowfrost, _we_ could go hunting together!"

"We want to go _walking_ , not _hunting_ , Crowfrost," Grassheart growled, although there was an almost flirty gleam in her eyes.

A growl rumbled dangerously in my throat.

"Good idea, right, Frostcrow? Hunting? Just me and you? Like best friends do all the time?"

" _I'll_ go hunting with you, Crowfrost," I spoke up loudly.

"Actually Dawnpelt, Crowfrost and I just made plans to go hunting together and-"

"Fine," Crowfrost growled, "Come on, Dawnpelt."

Ferretclaw flashed me a hard look. "Why would you do that?" he demanded. "Why in StarClan's great name would you do that?"

I mumbled a sort of apology underneath my breath as I pushed past Ferretclaw, and sided up to Crowfrost. The sleek black tom was watching Waspstripe and Grassheart pad out of camp, annoyance evident in his pale blue orbs.

"Let's go," I meowed hastily. "The sooner we start looking for prey, the better."

 **Dawn Frost**

"-I mean, it's like my position doesn't hold any authority anymore!" Crowfrost exclaimed. "Cats think that when I give them an order it's up for negotiation. That if they don't want to patrol, they don't have to patrol; if they don't want to stand fox-guard then they don't have to stand fox-guard."

"We don't even have a fox-guard anymore," I pointed out.

"My point still stands," Crowfrost retorted.

I stopped walking and fixed my mate with a hard look. "Why don't you tell me what's really bothering you, Crowfrost?" I meowed. "It's not like you to get so worked up over something so small."

The handsome black tom exhaled, agitated. "It's just… _Grassheart_? _Really_? First Smokefoot had to go and fall for a Dark Forest trainee, and now Waspstripe? They're both two outstanding toms, and they're taking scum as their mates!"

My tail lashed a single time, and I felt my skin start to burn beneath my pelt. I hated listening to Crowfrost complain about the Dark Forest trainees, a topic that regularly came up after his fallout with Smokefoot.

"They're not scum, Crowfrost," I meowed, as I fought to keep my voice steady.

"No, I guess they're not," Crowfrost agreed after a moment. I glanced up in surprise just in time to watch his eyes narrow. "They're _traitors_ ; they're _worse_ than scum."

" _Crowfrost,_ " I meowed sharply. "You can't talk about your Clanmates like that!"

"Why not?" he challenged. "If they can train with cats like Tigerstar and Brokenstar behind our backs-"

"You know what," I interrupted him, as annoyance dripped from my voice, "You have no idea who trained with who. You have no idea if they met with Tigerstar, or with a cat they'd never heard of before. So really, you can't judge them."

Crowfrost stopped walking and turned to stare at me, an incredulous expression worn upon his face. I stopped walking as well and met his gaze steadily, although inwardly, dread was mounting inside of my chest. A quiet voice whispered in my head, _the truth is going to come out soon, you won't be able to hide it forever. It's almost time…_ I shoved that voice to the back of my mind and ignored it.

" _I can't judge them_?" The ShadowClan deputy - my mate - echoed. Anger sparked in his pale, frosty-blue eyes. "I can't judge the cats who trained to slaughter my Clanmates? Are you even listening to yourself, Dawnpelt?"

"Are _you_ even listening to me?" I retorted. "You weren't there, you don't know what happened! The Dark Forest cats played on the trainees biggest fears and darkest secrets, several of them were threatened. Once they appeared in the Dark Forest they weren't allowed to leave, they were _forced_ to train there! If they told anyone about their plans, and the Dark Forest warriors found out, they would be slaughtered! Their _families_ would be slaughtered! _They had no choice_!"

For a few long, tense moments there was silence between us. My chest heaved as I fought to regain my breath, the freezing air chilled my lungs. My hazel eyes were narrowed though; I was tired of Crowfrost treating the trainees like they were worse than crowfood, when he didn't bother to listen to their side of the story.

Crowfrost narrowed his pale blue orbs. "Why are you defending them?" he demanded. "Why do _you_ care how I treat _them_?"

"Because the way you treat them is _wrong_!"

"Really? How so?"

"They're still _cats_ , Crowfrost," I pressed. "They're still the Clanmates you've shared a den with, who you've gone hunting with-"

"No they're not," he growled. "The cats I thought I knew would _never_ -"

"They didn't have a choice!" I cried. "They couldn't tell _anyone_!"

"Why do you care so much?!"

 _Here it comes…_ "Because I knew about the attack!"

Crowfrost's eyes widened, and my heart clenched when I realized that the fury in his gaze had been immediately replaced with terror. I would have rather he be furious with me. At least if Crowfrost was angry with me then we would shout and scream at each other. I couldn't say I missed the days when we hated each other, but at least that was familiar. After seasons it was almost even comfortable; I knew how to argue with Crowfrost.

But the way he was staring at me now, as if he were cornered by a ferocious badger and he knew he couldn't escape…

He'd never looked at me like that before, and I didn't know how to handle it.

I inhaled a breath and then said, "I know what you're thinking, but I didn't train there. Tigerheart did as a spy, and a few days before the attack…" I hesitated. Crowfrost was the last cat I would ever want to spill my secret to. "He dragged me into the forest and told me everything. Who was training there, when the attack was going to be launched, how dangerous it was… He said that if anyone found out he'd told me their plans, they would kill him."

I clenched my eyes shut. I hated to think of how came so close to losing another brother; my only other littermate. _Stripes_.

As I continued, I kept my eyes clenched shut. I didn't want to meet Crowfrost's gaze and see the horror that resided there, but if I looked anywhere else then it would be a sign of shame, or submission. I wasn't going to give him that satisfaction. "I said that we should warn Blackstar and the other Clans, but he told me that I couldn't tell anyone else about the Dark Forest's plans. If I did then it would put us both in danger. Instead he wanted me to run away from ShadowClan and hide until the battle was over."

My throat tightened, clogged with emotions. "He said that he'd already lost Flametail, and he didn't want to lose me too… he wanted me to seek shelter in the mountains, and when it was safe to return, he would come and get me. But I couldn't just leave ShadowClan in their greatest time of need, not to mention my friends and family. So I told him that I wasn't going anywhere, and that I would fight against the Dark Forest, but I wouldn't tell anyone else about the attack. I couldn't give away Tigerheart's position as a spy, for he would surely be killed; if not by a Dark Forest warrior, then by one of the other trainees."

That was it. That was the huge secret that I planned on never sharing with my mate. He despised the Dark Forest trainees because they were selfish and cowardly and refused to warn the Clans of the Dark Forest's plans. Even though I hadn't trained in the Dark Forest myself, I still knew about the attack. I had the exact same opportunity as every other trainee. I could have warned somebody.

The gleam in Crowfrost's eyes told me that he was thinking the same thing.

But despite that gleam - the one that was swiftly replacing his slowly fading look of horror - Crowfrost didn't speak right away. I suspected that he was letting this new piece of information sink in, judging it, and then would decide what to say. The silence that blanketed us made me feel like I was loosing my mind, but I maintained a stony front. I didn't regret my actions, and I wouldn't let Crowfrost change that.

I loved him, but this conversation was unavoidable. To act submissive and beg for his forgiveness was unacceptable.

The horror that had at first pool in Crowfrost's eyes was gone. That new gleam had replaced it now, and I wished that I were better at reading emotions and expressions. I couldn't quite pinpoint what exactly that gleam meant, but at that moment, his eyes reminded me of the bitter cold; they were as cold and unforgiving as a blizzard in the heart of leaf-bare, and it sent shivers down my spine.

Crow _frost_. For a tom who despised leaf-bare as passionately as possible, I thought he fit in with the cold season quite well.

"Whitewater."

I blinked, caught off guard. "Wha-"

"Cederheart. Tallpoppy. Toadfoot. Marshclaw. Thistlekit." His cold blue eyes hardened. "They all lost their lives in the Dark Forest battle, Dawnpelt. They died defending their Clan, their friends and families. We were ambushed, but maybe if someone - _anyone_ \- had given us a warning, we would have been able to prepare ourselves. Maybe then they wouldn't all be _dead_."

I narrowed my eyes. "They all died honorably. Don't take that away from them."

"They didn't _have_ to die at all," Crowfrost growled. "If you would have just told somebody about the attack-!"

"Then Tigerheart would have been killed!" I exclaimed. "How could I send my brother to his death?!"

"It's not like you haven't done it before!"

Silence.

My eyes widened and my stoney exterior crumbled. My legs suddenly felt too weak to support my body; I felt like someone was poking my heart with an extended claw. _Did… did he really just say that?_

"How _dare_ you!" I cried, intense sorrow making me furious and bold. "You have _no right_ to say that! You- _You_ -!"

"Our Clanmates are _dead_ because of you, Dawnpelt!" Crowfrost snarled.

"I'm not the one who slayed them!" I fired back. "I never laid a claw on them!"

"You killed them the moment you decided to not warn anybody about the attack," Crowfrost retorted.

I shook my head, unable to comprehend the argument. After we became mates I didn't think Crowfrost and I were even capable of reverting to our old ways. And even then we never had an argument as intense as this one.

"You shouldn't have mentioned Flametail," I growled softly. "You know how I struggle with what I did. You know it better than anyone else, you- _you_ _fox-hearted, sorry excuse for a warrior_!"

" _What_ did you just-"

"You don't know what it feels like!" I shouted, startling the blue-eyed tom. "You have no idea how it feels to loose a littermate! Someone you've known since the instant you were born! To share that type of connection with a cat, and then to watch them die right in front of your eyes, and you're completely helpless-"

"Oh, don't I?" Crowfrost challenged. "Have you already forgotten about Runningkit and Fallowkit?"

"That isn't the same thing," I snarled. "You weren't even a full-moon old when they died! Your bond with them wasn't as deep; you didn't train beside them, go on patrols with them. You will _never_ understand how it felt to lose Flametail!"

"You should have told someone!" Crowfrost yowled, so enraged that I thought he might lunge for my throat.

"I'd already killed Flametail, I wasn't going to kill Tigerheart too!" I screamed, just as fierce. "I wasn't going to go through that pain again!"

"You're the reason your Clanmates are dead!"

"Stop acting like you're so perfect!" I screeched. " _You're not_! You've made _mistakes_ , you've _hurt cats_! _You_ can't judge _me_ for anything!"

I laughed. It sounded dry and raspy, as a result of my screaming. It was humorless. It was a horrible sound. But I continued to laugh, even though I felt like I was loosing my mind and going insane. "I can't believe I was ever foolish enough to think that we could love each other," I rasped. Crowfrost cocked an eyebrow. "I can't believe… I can't believe that _anyone_ could _ever_ be foolish enough to fall in love with you. Every she-cat you've ever been with, you've filled their heads with lies; you've played games with them that have _hurt them_ , and-"

"You're wrong."

The soft statement was enough to cease my maniacal laughter. "What?"

The softness of his tone was not out of submission or guilt; it wasn't because he regret the words we'd exchanged. It was _dangerously_ soft, like the calm before the storm. Like this arguement - full of shallow insults and painful retorts - _wasn't the storm_.

Like there was something left unsaid, and it was going to be the worst one yet.

Crowfrost's eyes were as hard as his tone. "I've not hurt every she-cat I've ever been with. Shimmerpelt enjoys my games."

" _Shimmerpelt enjoys my games."_ It was a simple statement that spoke volumes.

Crowfrost had never told me about any of his past flings; maybe because he didn't want to hurt me, maybe because they didn't matter anymore to him. Whatever the reason, clearly he didn't feel the same way anymore.

But the statement went deeper than that, and my eyes widened when I caught onto what he really meant.

" _Shimmerpelt_ _ **enjoys**_ _my games."_ He was still meeting with another she-cat.

I acted out of raw emotion; I was mortified, I was hurt, and I was livid. Before I could even _think_ about the consequences that might follow my actions it was already too late.

With a screech I lunged forward, and raked my claws down Crowfrost's shoulder.

The sleek black tom stumbled backwards, partly from the impact and partly from shock. His frozen-blue eyes widened, until they resembled two pale moons. Blood dripped down his sleek black shoulder.

"I _hate_ you," I snarled. And at the moment, I think I actually meant it.

There's no telling how long we would have remained in those positions, frozen solid, waiting for the other to make a move if Grassheart's gasp hadn't sliced through the tense atmosphere.

Our heads both shot up, and I inhaled sharply when I noticed Grassheart and Waspstripe, perched on a slight hill, eyes wide with disbelief. _Oh StarClan, I forgot that they were out for a walk! Of course they heard us! Oh no, no no no!_

"Grassheart," I started desperately, " _wait_ -"

But it was too late. Grassheart had already spun around and was racing back towards camp as fast as she possibly could. There was only one reason why she would want to return to camp so badly, and that was the spread drama.

She was going to tell the Clan everything.

Horror masked my expression, and I looked to Waspstripe, pleadingly. "Waspstripe, _please,_ " I begged, "the Clan can't know about this!"

Waspstripe blinked, as if he still couldn't comprehend what he'd seen and heard, but finally he nodded. "I'll stop her," he promised, and then he too was racing towards camp.

I spun around so that I could face Crowfrost. "If Grassheart reaches camp before Waspstripe can catch up to her, the entire Clan will know that we were mates. They'll know that Tigerheart told me about the attack, they'll know that you-..." I stopped, abruptly. Crowfrost was simply staring at me.

Realization dawned upon me. "You don't care."

"Let Grassheart tell them," Crowfrost meowed. His eyes were hard again, drained of the surprise they'd previously displayed. "It doesn't matter anymore. We're through."

I gritted my teeth together in an attempt to resist the urge to start ranting and raving again. I was comforted slightly by the sight of his still-bleeding shoulder; a part of me prayed that it would scar. Give him something to remember this by.

"Fine," I spat. And with that touching last word, I spun around and streaked back to camp. Fury fueled my adrenaline, until I was running so fast that I thought I was flying. _Great StarClan, please, if you're listening, don't let me be too late._

 **Dawn Frost**

When I came to a screeching halt in the center of camp, all eyes were on me. Maybe that was because I darted inside the camp like I was being chased by the entirety of WindClan, but I had a feeling it was more than that.

One look at my Clanmates expressions' confirmed my fears.

Rowanstar and Tawnypelt were staring at me as if I'd grown a second head. Tigerheart's fur bristled, his sights set unwaveringly on the camp entrance, as if Crowfrost would stroll in at any moment. Spikefur was glaring at his paws, tail lashing behind him; I'd never seen him look so agitated.

And Olivenose…

"She's lying, isn't she, Dawnpelt?" Olivenose pleaded, as she stepped forward to meet me. Her gaze flickered towards the Tall Boulder, where Grassheart was seated. Waspstripe stood behind her, eyes narrowed on the she-cat. I blinked, momentarily distracted when I noticed that Grassheart looked… almost _ashamed_.

"Dawnpelt?" Olivenose prompted. My gaze snapped back towards my best friend, whose vivid green eyes were so full of hope and disbelief.

I couldn't find the right words to give her; to confirm her worst fears and yet at the same time, preserve our friendship. Suddenly I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders, and my legs started to wobble. I lowered my head so that my nose almost touched the soggy ground.

It told Olivenose all it needed to.

"Y-you were mates with him," the tortoiseshell she-cat stammered, as she stepped backwards, away from me. "No, no you would never do that to me. You know how much Crowfrost means to me, you _would never_ -!" A sob caught in her throat, and before I could apologize Olivenose shoved me aside and bolted out of the camp.

I turned to chase after her, even though the thought of running ever again made me want to pass out. But before I could muster the strength to put one paw in front of the other Owlclaw appeared next to me. "I'll go after her, Dawnpelt," he murmured. I didn't try to protest.

Instead I collapsed onto the cold, soggy ground and buried my head between my paws. I was drained both mentally and physically, and even more then that, I was _heartbroken_.

A sob shook my shoulders as tears started to roll down my face. My Clanmates had formed a loose circle around me, and exchanged uneasy glances with one another. What should they do? This wasn't like me. I wasn't the type of cat to throw a tantrum in the middle of camp, and toss my pride and dignity into the snow.

But at the moment I couldn't care less about my pride or my dignity; I didn't care about my Clanmates, or what they must have been thinking. I felt like I'd lost everything, and I was going to mourn everything.

I was vaguely aware of a cat settling next to me, and for a moment I thought it was Spikefur. But the scent that soon washed over my senses told me otherwise; it was Tigerheart.

He pressed his muzzle against my cheek and then rasped his tongue soothingly over my ears. "I'm sorry," he murmured.

"You t-tried to warn me," I whimpered, my words broken and muffled. "I should h-have listened t-to you…" Tigerheart didn't verbally reply, instead choosing to lick my forehead again. "I told him everything… that y-you told me about the attack… he _hates_ me now, Tigerheart!"

"It's his loss," Tigerheart whispered.

I shook my head, and another sob racked my body. "Tigerheart, I-I… _I loved him_ , and now he hates me! He hates me, Tigerheart, _he hates me_!"

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

Laying beside a bed of reeds, expression perfectly readable, head heavy with dark thoughts; when did I become such a cliche?

Dawnpelt ruined me. She absolutely ruined me.

My shoulder was still bleeding heavily from where she'd clawed it. I didn't even bother to clean the wound, or get rid of the blood. It would probably scar, give me something to remember her by. What a morbid twist of fate.

Suddenly the tall reeds quivered, and then out-stepped a silver tabby she-cat with wide blue eyes. Confusion dawned upon my features, and I tilted my head to the side, quizzically. _Has Shimmerpelt always looked so... plain?_ No, she'd hadn't. At one point I thought she was the second most breathtaking she-cat in all the Clans.

Now I thought that if she stood beside Dawnpelt, she would only embarrass herself.

"Crowfrost?" Shimmerpelt sounded just as confused as I felt. "What are you doing here? And why is your shoulder bleeding?" She sounded alarmed, concerned. How sweet of her.

I inhaled a deep breath as I pushed myself to my paws. Then I locked eyes with the once-gorgeous she-cat and asked, "Do you believe in love?"

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **What are your predictions for next chapter? (Remember, there are still roughly seven chapters left!)**

 **#My lips are sealed, but... prepare yourselves for lots of drama!**

* * *

 **I'm honestly not sure how to start this AN. I'm sure this chapter didn't go like you thought it would, especially since Crowfrost and Dawnpelt became mates only last chapter. Sorry you guys didn't get to bask in the CrowxDawn fluffiness for long, but I hope this explains why last chapter was so fluffy! It's because I knew that it wouldn't last, and I wanted to give you guys something to hold onto. Pretty sweet of me, right? ;)**

 **Well, have no fear, DF _will_ get a happy ending! It just… it might take awhile, because these next few chapters aren't very fluffy at all. But stick with me guys, because we're nearing the end!**

 **Also, massive thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter because… we reached our goal! We surpassed 31 reviews, making last chapter the most reviewed chapter yet :) It was a wonderful birthday present!**

 **For those of you who don't know, I'm still running the poll contest on my profile! The next set was just updated yesterday :)**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	15. Spikefur's Point of View

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did then Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world. Also, can we take a second to admire the new coverart, created by ? Thank you, Leafy!**

* * *

 **Chapter Fifteen - Spikefur's Point of View**

* * *

 **"I know I can treat you better than he can, and any girl like you deserves a gentleman.  
Tell me why are we wasting time on all your wasted crying when you should be with me instead?" - Treat You Better, Shawn Mendes**

 **Spikefur's POV**

A rush of emotions flooded me when Grassheart burst into camp and announced that Dawnpelt and Crowfrost were mates. I wanted to believe that my sister was lying, as she was prone to dramatics, but when Waspstripe followed her into camp and scolded her for announcing such private information, I knew it was true.

Then came the unavoidable sense of bitter defeat. It's not like I thought that Dawnpelt had feelings for me, but I… I thought it was possible that one day, she might develop them. I'd wondered if there was something I was doing wrong, something to push her away, but as it turned out it was nothing that I was doing; it was that she'd already fallen for Crowfrost.

And then came the blow to my ego. In all honestly, I shouldn't have been so offended that Dawnpelt had taken Crowfrost on as her mate. I would begrudgingly admit that Crowfrost was an impressive cat by every sense of the word. It was just… was there no she-cat immune to his charms? Why did they all have to fall into Crowfrost's trap? Why was it so easy for him to trap them?

I'd thought Dawnpelt was different. Why wasn't she different?

I wasn't easily jealous of others, but it just didn't seem fair. Crowfrost could have any she-cat he wanted, and all he had to do was blink his eyes or twitch his whiskers. So why did he have to choose Dawnpelt, of all she-cats? Why couldn't he have picked Olivenose, who was clearly head over paws for with him? Why did he have to pick the one she-cat who I loved?

Why was it that arrogant fox-hearts like Crowfrost prevailed in the world, and genuinely good cats like me were left standing in the snow, forgotten and cold?

 **Dawn Frost**

The next morning, the day after the split, I decided to talk to Dawnpelt. She was probably feeling miserable, like StarClan was against her. I couldn't blame her. If my best friend was ignoring me and my mate had abandoned me, I wouldn't be bouncing cheerfully through the snow either.

An image appeared in my mind, of Dawnpelt laying in a damp nest in the corner of a dark den, head heavy with dark thoughts and a look of utter anguish masking her features. I shoved the depressing image to the back of my mind, and headed determinedly towards the warriors' den.

The den was empty, save for one gorgeous, creamy-colored she-cat. The image that had appeared in my head didn't quite mirror reality, but it was close enough to make my heart hurt. Dawnpelt certainly _looked_ miserable.

I couldn't help but feel a twinge of resentment towards my Clanmates. Towards Crowfrost for breaking Dawnpelt's heart; towards Tigerheart for abandoning Dawnpelt to patrol the territory; towards Olivenose for behaving so selfishly; towards the rest of the Clan for not being there for Dawnpelt when she needed them most.

 _Well, if they would rather pretend like Dawnpelt isn't suffering right now then that's fine with me,_ I thought. _I'll just have to comfort her enough to make up for their absence._

"Hi," I murmured, as I entered the musky den. "How are you-"

"Not now, Spikefur," Dawnpelt interrupted me, before I could even finish my question. "I don't want to talk to anyone."

"Talking about it will make you feel better," I suggested, hopefully.

But Dawnpelt shook her head. "Maybe later, but right now I just want to be left alone."

 _But no one should have to endure something like this alone,_ I thought helplessly. What was I supposed to do?

I took a step forward and asked, "What if we go for a walk? We can get away from camp for awhile, and-"

"Spikefur," Dawnpelt snapped, "are you even listening to me? I said I want to be left alone!"

She sounded like she meant that. But… but how could she? In your lowest moments when your life had shattered, you couldn't pick up the pieces by yourself. You needed help from your friends and family to pick them up. And that was precisely what I planned on doing.

I sat down in front of Dawnpelt, curled my tail neatly around my paws, and then started softly, "I know you must feel like StarClan is against you right now. And, considering how Olivenose reacted to the news, you probably feel like a horrible friend. But Dawnpelt… you're such a brilliant she-cat. You're intelligent, courageous, loyal. And if Crowfrost can't see that then it's his fault. I just-"

Dawnpelt's head shot up and her hazel eyes flashed with fury. "Spikefur, _leave me alone_!"

Caught off guard, I nearly stumbled backwards. "I jus-"

"What don't you understand?" she demanded. "I don't want to talk to you, or anyone else right now. That's why I sent everyone away!"

 _She sent everyone away?_ My heart dropped deep inside my chest. I'd been wrong. I thought that no one cared about Dawnpelt, but _she_ sent them away.

"Why are you staring at me like I've gone crazy?" The creamy-colored she-cat shook her head, disgusted. "Great StarClan, this is why I _can't stand_ cats like you!"

I fliched, as if Dawnpelt had just clawed my muzzle. She might as well have.

"I'm sorry I bothered you," I whispered, before I spun around and darted out of the den.

 **Dawn Frost**

I didn't understand how he could act so nonchalant about the whole ordeal.

Crowfrost hadn't returned the night of the split, and I didn't see him the following morning either. But when I appeared from the warriors den - right after Dawnpelt told me she hated me - there he was, in all of his shining, stupid glory. He was sitting on top of the Tall Boulder, magnificent and proud and powerful.

For a brief moment I wondered how it must've felt to be him.

Then I remembered that Crowfrost was an arrogant fox-heart who cared only for himself, and suddenly I wasn't so curious.

Three days had passed since then. Dawnpelt still wanted to be left alone (this time I didn't try to disturb her; I wasn't sure I could take any more blows to my heart), and Crowfrost still acted as if he were StarClan's great gift to the Clans.

I just _didn't understand_. Crowfrost had given up the most perfect she-cat in all of the Clans, but by the way he was behaving, one would be inclined to believe that he'd just been made Clan leader! It was _he_ who should have been moping inside a damp, dark den, not Dawnpelt! As far as I was concerned Crowfrost was the one who'd lost everything.

Apparently, the black and white tom disagreed with me.

Even though three days had past, it seemed like all the Clan wanted to gossip about was Dawnpelt and Crowfrost.

"I still can't believe they were actually mates," Stoatfur meowed one day, while we were out patrolling the ThunderClan border.

"I know," Starlingwing agreed. "I thought they would always despise each other!"

"I can't believe that none of you never noticed their feelings before," Ferretclaw meowed, matter-of-factly. "It's always been clear that Crowfrost had feelings for Dawnpelt; I just thought we weren't talking about it."

I shot the cream and gray tom a quizzical glance. "You mean you've always known about their feelings? _How_?"

Ferretclaw snorted. "You mean it wasn't obvious? It's the way they always used to argue! Crowfrost _always_ acts coldly towards cats who he's fond of."

Starlingwing raised an eyebrow. "What makes you so sure?"

"Because he treats me the exact same way, and we're best friends," Ferretclaw cheerfully replied, before he bounced to the head of the patrol. I exchanged glances with Starlingwing and then bounded after him.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

I couldn't take it anymore. This was driving me insane!

"When are you going to demote me?" I demanded, as I stormed inside Rowanstar's den.

The large ginger tom had been finishing off a stringy toad when I interrupted him. He raised his head and met my gaze evenly. "Why would I demote you?" he asked, although there was no real curiosity or confusion behind the inquiry. He was playing with me; messing with my mind.

"Because I broke your daughter's heart, and I was meeting with a RiverClan she-cat behind your back," I replied bluntly. Rowanstar had heard Grassheart's announcement. He knew exactly why he should demote me.

The green-eyed tom tilted his head to the side. "Do _you_ think I should demote you?"

Oh, that was cruel. Now he was _really_ trying to drive me insane.

Lying would get me nowhere here, and besides, Rowanstar already had all the answers. "I don't think I could ever give you a reason to demote me," I answered honestly.

Rowanstar studied me for a few heart-beats, green eyes narrowed intensely. I held his gaze, but privately I would admit that it wasn't easy. Despite his cool exterior, the storm of emotions in his eyes gave him away. Rowanstar was furious with me. "Well," he finally meowed, "I don't agree with _that_. But you can certainly get away with cases that others couldn't."

"But not this case, right?" My features contorted into an expression of bitter defeat. "You could overlook my meetings with Shimmerpelt, but I broke Dawnpelt's heart, and that's unforgivable, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is," Rowanstar agreed. My heart plummeted deep inside my chest. "However…"

My head shot up, and it took me seconds to school my features into an expression of neutrality. It was even harder to keep that mask in place; hope had quickly blossomed inside my chest. Was there a chance that I could keep my position?

 _There really shouldn't be!_

 _Shut-up! Don't ruin this for me!_

"However-?" I prompted my Clan leader, desperate to hear his compromise.

I didn't notice how cold Rowanstar's eyes had become until after he'd already spoken. "However, ShadowClan has always been ruled by ambitious, arrogant fox-hearts. I see no reason to change that now."

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Spikefur's POV**

I'd been sharing tongues with Stoatfur when Crowfrost emerged from the leader's den. I hadn't been watching for him, but the new scar on his shoulder had a habit of catching my eye. I knew it was vain of me, but every time I saw it I resisted the urge to smirk.

"Wow," Stoatfur murmured to herself. "I wonder what he talked to Rowanstar about. Whatever it was, it must not have gone well…"

 _Hmm?_ I forced myself to look away from the scar and focused on the tom's expression, and when I did I blinked, caught off guard. There was something strange about Crowfrost's expression. He didn't quite look sad, nor disappointed, or even defeated. He looked… almost _haunted_. Stoatfur was right; whatever he and Rowanstar had discussed, it must not have gone well.

And then it hit me; the only reason Crowfrost could look so bothered by a meeting with Rowanstar.

Rowanstar must have demoted him as deputy!

The thought made me grin, ecstatic. I knew I shouldn't find so much joy in Crowfrost's downfalls, but… it seemed like Crowfrost had never suffered the consequences for any of his actions. As a matter of fact, I was willing to bet that even as a kit, he'd never been scolded. From the moment he was born he must have been showered with praise; it was the only explanation as to how his ego was so massive.

It wasn't fair. Everything came so naturally to him, and everyone was so eager to please him. It wasn't hard to prance around like a StarClan warrior when that was exactly what others viewed you as.

But after Rowanstar replaced Crowfrost as deputy, they would _have_ to stop worshipping him, right?

And so I waited. I waited for Rowanstar to emerge from his den, scale the Tall Boulder, and then announce the new deputy of ShadowClan. Just to entertain myself I analyzed my Clanmates, and tried to guess which one of them would fulfill Crowfrost's position. Surprisingly enough no one really stuck out as the obvious choice.

 _Well, Rowanstar must have somebody in mind,_ I thought to myself. _Besides, he's more aware of their faults and positives than I am._

But the longer I waited the more concerned I became. A quick glance informed me that the moon would be at its peak in only a few hours, and according to the law, a new deputy had to be announced before moonhigh. Even ShadowClan had to abide by that rule.

And then the moon reached his highest peak in the star-studded sky, and there was still no signs that Rowanstar had selected the new deputy. The large ginger tom had gone hunting, shared tongues, checked in on Jayfeather, but he made no attempt to call a Clan meeting. Finally I concluded that Rowanstar must not have decided on the new deputy just yet, and I would wait a few more days. Maybe he just needed some time to think the decision over; after all, it wasn't one to be made lightly...

 **Dawn Frost**

"Hey, Spikefur."

I looked up from the frog I'd been eating and nearly choked when I came face to face with Dawnpelt. Immediately the memory of our last conversation came flooding back to mind. My heart pounded painfully against my chest. If Dawnpelt was here to remind me of that she hated me, I wasn't sure how gracefully I could handle it…

"Uh, hi, Dawnpelt," I stammered, and inwardly cursed myself. "Who are yo-I mean, what are you-how do you-"

"I'm sorry," the creamy-colored she-cat suddenly interrupted me.

I blinked stupidly, caught off guard. "You're what?"

"I'm not going to say it again," she meowed, although the weak smile that played across her lips contradicted her harsh words. "But, you know… for the last time we talked…"

"You mean when you told me you hated me?" I asked, a slight edge to my voice.

Dawnpelt shifted her weight on her paws, clearly uncomfortable. "I never said I hated you. I said I couldn't stand toms like you."

I snorted. "Right, because that's _so_ much better."

Where was this animosity coming from? Well, no, I knew where it was coming from, but why was it suddenly showing up? I'd spent the past few days licking the wound Dawnpelt had inflicted upon my heart, and whenever I thought back to the memory, I never felt anger; I knew I'd pushed her too far. It was my fault.

I had no right to feel such resentment, and yet here I was, clipping my words and making sarcastic remarks. That's not the type of cat I was! That was the very opposite of who I wanted to be!

Annoyance was evident in Dawnpelt's eyes. "Look I-I'm not good with words," she started. "I'm not outgoing or sociable and I'd rather be alone than be surrounded by a cluster of cats. Sometimes I act upon emotion and I say things that I don't really mean."

The tension in my shoulders started to loosen. "You mean… you don't hate me?"

"I've never hated you," came Dawnpelt's brisk reply. "Even when you were pestering me about that walk, I never said I hated you. I said-"

"-that you can't stand toms like me," I finished. "Right, we've established that."

The hazel-eyed warrior shook her head. "No, you don't understand what I'm trying to say. When I said that, what I meant was… I can't stand toms who pursue me like I'm this perfect StarClan warrior. Who believe they're in love with me and we're soulmates, and we're destined to be together."

I swallowed uncomfortably and made a point to not look at my paws in shame. This type of behavior was starting to sound very familiar.

"Toms who," she met my gaze, pointedly, "ignore my wishes and try to get me to go on walks with them, because they believe they know what's best for me; that if they can just get me alone, I'll come out of my slump and realize that they're my true love..."

Hmm, yes, very familiar behavior indeed.

Alright, I succumbed to my guilt and shamefully lowered my head. "I'm sorry," I mumbled. "I just-... you looked so miserable, and I thought that after everything that happened you could use a friend."

Dawnpelt sat down beside me. Our pelts brushed for a brief moment, and I found myself hoping the moment would return. "Not every cat is the same," Dawnpelt meowed. "Some cats need to be alone, while others fear solitude…" she trailed off as her features contorted into a decidedly sober expression. I wondered what she was thinking…

"Anyway," Dawnpelt pressed on, her tone a bit softer, "I just wanted some silence to help me organize my thoughts, and… mourn for everything I lost. Taking a walk was the very last thing I wanted to do."

"I'm sorry," I repeated myself, as the last traces of my indignance ebbed away. "I didn't-I should have considered what you wanted, and what you were saying. You're right; I thought I knew what was best for you." I heaved a heavy sigh. "I was a lousy friend, wasn't I?"

"Maybe," Dawnpelt agreed, her voice full of remorse, "but it's not like I can scold anyone for being a lousy friend."

I glanced at the gorgeous warrior and was tempted to encourage her; to tell her that Olivenose would eventually come back around, and things could go back to normal. But suddenly I wasn't so eager to meddle in Dawnpelt's business, les I get snapped at again. I'd certainly learned my lesson.

For a while, Dawnpelt and I simply sat at the edge of camp, silent as snowfall. Our Clanmates didn't even spare us a curious glance; it was like we were invisible to them. Typically I might have been inclined to join a patrol or share tongues with a friend, but at that moment I was content with the peace.

Eventually Crowfrost ruined my vision. He padded into camp, assigned a few cats to an extra hunting patrol he felt like leading, and then set off again. I was begrudgingly impressed by the sleek black tom; he never stopped moving. Very rarely did I ever catch him sharing tongues or just lounging around the camp. StarClan, very rarely did I ever catch him _sleeping_!

A soft sigh caught my attention; I didn't bother glancing at Dawnpelt, fore there was no need for confirmation. She must have noticed Crowfrost as well.

"You know," I started slowly, not totally sure that this was a good idea, "we could always go on that walk now…"

Dawnpelt shot me an unimpressed glance. "Is taking walks your favorite thing to do?"

"They are when they're with you," I answered honestly.

"Oh," Dawnpelt breathed, and her hazel eyes softened. "Well… I suppose it wouldn't hurt to stretch my legs."

"Does that mean 'yes'?" I asked, hopefully.

The creamy-colored she-cat exhaled. "Yes."

"Great!" I couldn't help but beam as I stood to my paws, and waited for Dawnpelt to do the same. "Come on, let's go."

 **Dawn Frost**

Dawnpelt was gradually starting to become involved in the Clan again. It took her roughly five sunrises to reach the point where she felt comfortable enough to do so, which I'm sure some considered much too long (the elders in particular thought Dawnpelt was behaving rather dramatically), but I was simply thankful that it didn't take her half a moon to get out of this slump, like it did her last one.

Idly, I wondered what caused that last slump. Dawnpelt never went into details, and if Tigerheart or Olivenose knew anything they hadn't gossiped about it.

I brushed the question off so that I could focus on hunting. Crowfrost had assigned me to a evening patrol, along with Ratscar and Applefur. Dawnpelt had tagged along as well. Crowfrost certainly didn't seem thrilled when his ex-mate volunteered to join my hunting patrol, but he grit his teeth and bared it.

It was the most they'd interacted since the split.

Ratscar was at the head of the patrol conversing with Applefur, while Dawnpelt and I lingered back. I wasn't trying to eavesdrop on their conversation but I couldn't help but overhear Ratscar tell Applefur that Honeypaw was doing much better, and finally agreed to train as Jayfeather's apprentice.

I purred and glanced at Dawnpelt. "You didn't tell me that Honeypaw was officially a medicine cat apprentice! That's fantastic news!"

Dawnpelt mustered a flimsy smile. "It must've slipped my mind. But she's pleased with her new position… probably."

I blinked. "You mean you haven't talked to her about it yet?" But Dawnpelt was so close to Honeypaw and her siblings!

"I, uh," the she-cat looked away, shamefaced, "I haven't actually visited Honeypaw since Jayfeather and Blossomfall joined the Clan…"

"Dawnpelt!" I exclaimed, more forcefully than I meant to.

"What?" she snapped. "It's not that I don't want to visit Honeypaw, but… Jayfeather's always in the den whenever I think about it…"

A sympathetic frown played across my lips. "Right, I forgot about your history with Jayfeather."

"Well then you're the only cat who has," she replied dryly. A moment later and her face fell. "I don't think Honeypaw's bothered by my absence though. I'm not as close to those three as I used to be; training has kept Cloverpaw busy, Honeypaw was injured, and now I'm probably finished as Hailpaw's mentor."

Her last remark caught me off guard. "What do you mean you're finished as his mentor? Just because you and Crowfrost aren't mates anymore doesn't-"

"It's for the best, Spikefur," Dawnpelt interrupted me, her voice full of warning. "If Crowfrost and I were to continue working together it would only create tension. Hailpaw's a sharp young cat, it would affect his training." She exhaled loudly and then echoed, "It's for the best."

I wondered who she was trying to convince: me, or herself.

"Well," I started hesitantly, "I'm sure that Honeypaw misses you. You should visit her soon. And maybe… maybe it's time to talk to Jayfeather too?"

"Spikefur," Dawnpelt warned softly.

"I'm not trying to tell you what to do," I added quickly. "I just… what happened with Flametail was moons ago. Aren't you tired of this thing with Jayfeather hanging over you like a stormcloud?"

For a few heartbeats Dawnpelt didn't speak, and I thought she was actually considering my suggestion. Then she said, "Keep your muzzle where it belongs, Spikefur."

 **Dawn Frost**

Three days had passed since I noticed Crowfrost exit Rowanstar's den with a haunted expression; three days and there was still no sign that Rowanstar planned on appointing a new deputy. StarClan, even the elders weren't gossiping about it!

But they should have been. The entire Clan should have been talking about it, because it should have been considered realistic. Crowfrost didn't deserve such an respectable position.

And if Rowanstar didn't agree then I was going to make him see reason.

Or, at least I was going to attempt to. In all actuality I wasn't bold enough to storm up to the large ginger tom and start demanding things like I wanted to. I would probably wait until he wasn't busy, approach him, and then politely request an audience with him.

Curse my meek nature!

My chance finally arrived that night, just a little past twilight. Rowanstar was speaking to Jayfeather and it didn't look like any other cats were vying for his attention; perfect. Once their conversation started to die down I swooped in like a hawk.

"Rowanstar," I meowed, as the Clan leader exited the medicine cat den. "Could I have a word with you? In private?"

My request seemed to surprise the green-eyed tom, but he nodded anyways. "Of course, Spikefur. We can speak in my den."

Alright, so far so good. Everything was going according to plan.

Rowanstar's den was large and comfortable. The floor was covered with fresh moss and pine needles, and there was a large nest in the corner of the den, presumably where he and Tawnypelt slept. I wondered if Dawnpelt and I would ever share a nest…

"What did you want to discuss, Spikefur?" Rowanstar inquired.

I inhaled a breath to steel my nerves, and then carefully started, "I would like to ask you to consider replacing Crowfrost as deputy. I don't feel like he deserves the position."

In all honestly I expected my request to startle the large ginger tom. But Rowanstar hardly seemed surprised; actually, he seemed more annoyed than anything. His green eyes narrowed suspiciously, and I found myself wanting to shrink underneath his gaze. "And why, pry tell, do you feel this way?"

"Why don't you?" I blurted out before I could think of an acceptable response. I immediately regretted my words, and resisted the urge to hang my head in defeat. _Nice going, Spikefur. Now he'll never take you seriously!_ In a hurried attempt to salvage what little dignity I had left, I rushed onwards and said, "Crowfrost is famous around the lake for having flings with multiple she-cats from every Clan; everyone thought he'd stopped that after the Dark Forest battle, but evidently we were wrong. That isn't appropriate behavior from an average warrior, much less the Clan deputy."

Rowanstar didn't interrupt me, so I went on. "Crowfrost is disrespectful, arrogant, self-absorbed and he believes he's above the Warrior Code. He prances around the camp like he's StarClan's great gift to the Clans and we should all worship the ground he walks upon; he doesn't always handle situations professionally, like the time he burst into camp and woke every cat up, just to punish us for voting for a new deputy.

"Rowanstar, _please_ ," I begged, "you saw how many cats voted for a new deputy; they almost outnumbered those who wanted to keep him! I'm not the only one who's dissatisfied with Crowfrost's position."

Despite such a messy beginning to my request, I thought I ended it rather nicely. I'd certainly gotten my point across, and even brought up a few strong points. At the very least I'd given Rowanstar something to consider.

The large, ginger tabby tom was silent for a minute. His expression was stone-hard but his dark green eyes looked thoughtful. It was almost like he was fighting an internal battle against himself. Finally he meowed, "I understand why you think I should replace him, Spikefur," he started. "And I know that you're not the only one who feels this way. However, the fact remains that Crowfrost is the best cat for the position."

My hopeful expression fell. "Do you honestly believe that?" I asked, unable to keep a twinge of betrayal out of my voice. I was Rowanstar's loyal subject, why wasn't he taking my request more seriously? Would he not even consider replacing Crowfrost?

Anger flared within my chest, and before I could calm it I growled, "Or is the reason why you show so much favoritism towards Crowfrost because he used to be your apprentice, and you've got a soft spot towards him?"

Rowanstar's eyes widened, and then anger flooded their dark green depths. " _Excuse me_?" he snarled.

 _Oh dear StarClan, please don't let those be my last words!_

"I'm so sorry," I hurriedly apologized. "I-I don't know where that came from, I would never talk so disrespectfully towards a Clan leader-"

"And yet you just did," Rowanstar growled softly.

I swallowed the clump of fear that balled in the back of my throat. "I spoke without considering the consequences," I meowed quietly, doing everything within my power to appear humble and apologetic. "I apologize, Rowanstar. I'll never speak to you that way again."

"No, you won't," the intimidating tom agreed.

My ears flattened against my head, and my tail dropped. Whatever chance there'd been for a new deputy had been destroyed, thanks to me.

"Thank you for your time, Rowanstar," I mumbled. I dipped my head respectfully and then hurriedly stood to my paws, prepared to exit the den and then never show my face again.

"Wait, Spikefur."

I hesitated and glanced backwards. Rowanstar gestured for me to sit down again, and I obeyed him. Dread started to build inside my chest. The fur along his spine still bristled as he asked, "Who would you recommend that I replace Crowfrost with?"

I blinked, taken back. Rowanstar wanted _my_ opinion on the matter? "I-I don't know," I stammered.

"Think about it for a moment," Rowanstar encouraged me.

My brows furrowed as I went over each of my Clanmates in my mind. They all had certain qualities that were desired in a great deputy, but none of them screamed, _Pick me!_ Finally I shook my head, mortified. "No one comes immediately to mind, Rowanstar."

"That's because none of them could be deputy," Rowanstar meowed, his voice unwavering and confident. "Ivytail, while a great mentor, doesn't have the patience required to run a Clan; Ratscar is too eager to leap into a fight; Tigerheart, while ambitious, is too lazy to maintain such a strict schedule; Dawnpelt lacks the social skills to negotiate with others without offending them; Starlingwing would become too concerned with maintaining an appearance, and Waspstripe is too young."

Rowanstar's expression became thoughtful as he gazed upon me. "But you, Spikefur…"

"No," I immediately meowed. "I would die for ShadowClan, but I can't be a deputy! I don't _wan_ t to be the deputy!"

"And _that's_ the problem with everyone else," Rowanstar exclaimed, as if he'd been anticipating my protest. "We're ShadowClan - ambition is in our blood. It's been bred into us just as much as our love for the shadows. But cats like Applefur, Pinenose, Owlclaw and Stoatfur? They're content with serving the Clan as average warriors. They would rather take orders than give them. They couldn't handle the pressure that a Clan leader or deputy must carry everyday.

"But Crowfrost," Rowanstar continued, "is different. He's isn't the most patient tom in the Clan, but he's patient enough; he's a skilled fighter and thrives in the heat of a battle, but he would never risk his Clanmates lives if he didn't have to; you've seen his dedication to organizing patrols. He sends them out at the exact same time everyday, and even has a few of his own routines that he sticks to.

"He's incredibly social, maybe even too social for his own good. But he has several friends in every Clan, which is helpful. Charisma and confidence radiates from him in waves, and he's an excellent negotiator. If ShadowClan ever needs help from anyone," Rowanstar wrinkled his nose, as if the thought disgusted him, "then Crowfrost will be able to secure it."

 _Well, he has a point,_ I begrudgingly admitted. I thought back to the last Gathering, when Rowanstar had asked one of the medicine cats to come live in ShadowClan. The other Clans had all protested and rebelled, but the moment Crowfrost stepped forward they changed their minds. Suddenly it didn't sound like too much of a sacrifice to give up their medicine cat in the middle of leaf-bare.

"But it goes deeper than that," Rowanstar meowed. "Any loyal warrior would defend their Clan to their dying breath, but there are some who would beyond that." He snorted, "When that fox burst into the Clan, Crowfrost didn't hesitate before leaping onto her back and clawing at her ears. And then he taunted her so that she would chase him through the forest, while he was fighting a concussion!"

"There's a difference between bravery and recklessness," I pointed out, unable to keep a twinge of bitterness out of my tone.

"And then sometimes they join together to create fearlessness," Rowanstar replied.

A frown tugged at the corners of my lips. "You believe that Crowfrost is fearless?" Impossible. No cat was truly fearless.

"I believe that Crowfrost is close," Rowanstar replied evenly. "Every cat has something they fear, and Crowfrost is no exception. But I believe that he has moments where he _is_ fearless. At the very least, Crowfrost does not fear death, and I'm confident that he would willingly sacrifice his life for the good of ShadowClan."

I knew that my frustration must have gleamed clearly in my eyes, so I lowered my gaze to my paws. I wouldn't risk upsetting Rowanstar again.

Rowanstar brushed past me and tapped my shoulder with his tail; the signal to follow him. He didn't go very far at all; he settled at the lip of the den. I complied and sat beside him. From that spot I could observe the entire Clan.

"I know what really motivated you to see me, Spikefur," the large ginger tom rumbled. "I've seen the way you look at Dawnpelt."

The tips of my ears burned like they were on fire. Embarrassed, I meowed, "I've always thought that Crowfrost needs to be replaced. What happened between him and Dawnpelt was simply the breaking point."

"I appreciate your concern regarding Dawnpelt, but she's capable of looking after herself. If I were to replace Crowfrost right now, she would think I did it simply because he hurt her; she would never forgive me for that. She _wants_ to fight her own battles, so I'm letting her."

I heaved a heavy sigh. "She _is_ rather independent… I just… it doesn't seem fair. For days Dawnpelt has moped around camp, clearly brokenhearted, but Crowfrost structs like nothing ever happened."

"No one ever said that love was fair. More often than not, it isn't very fair at all."

"Dawnpelt deserves better than Crowfrost," I pressed. "She's so intelligent, brave, loyal, and she fell for a cat who is notorious for breaking hearts and then stepping over the mess. I know that we don't choose who we fall in love with, but…" I trailed off, unable to find the words to express my thoughts.

Silence blanketed us like a sheet of snow. Finally Rowanstar said, "Crowfrost isn't perfect, despite what he may project. As a matter of fact, I believe that Crowfrost knows how far he is from perfect, and that's why he tries so hard to maintain that image; he's afraid that if others knew, they would abandon him."

I looked at my Clan leader, puzzled. _Wha-_

"You don't know Crowfrost like you think you do," Rowanstar went on. "Hardly anyone knows Crowfrost like they think they do. I only know him - _the true him_ \- because I was his mentor. Smokefoot only knows him because they grew up together, and Scorchfur and Dawnpelt only know him because he allowed them to.

"I get the feeling that you believe Crowfrost has grown up with everything," the green-eyed tom meowed. "But to gain everything, you must first lose everything. There was a point in time when Crowfrost was very young and had nothing. Looking at him now you would never believe it, but he worked hard for everything he has. Every inch of skill, every passion, every heartbeat…"

"What do you mean?" I asked softly.

"That's not my business to tell you," Rowanstar meowed. "If you want to know then ask Crowfrost yourself. If you decide it's not worth it, then I want you to remember something, Spikefur: no matter how much Crowfrost may act like he isn't hurting right now, every cat has a demon that torments them. He's in more pain than he lets on."

 **Dawn Frost**

My conversation with Rowanstar left me with a lot to think about: about Crowfrost, Dawnpelt, and even myself. It was clear that Rowanstar wasn't going to demote Crowfrost, but I still couldn't think of a suitable replacement for him, so I tried not to complain.

I found that I'd starting looking at the black tom a little differently. Not very much; I still resisted the urge to smirk whenever I caught sight of the scar on his shoulder, and I I still despised the way he pranced and strutted. But I didn't think so venomously of him anymore. Rowanstar had implied that he suffered from a dark kithood, and I found that I wanted to know more.

But I wouldn't ask him about it. It wasn't any of my business, and besides, I wasn't in a hurry to speak to Crowfrost anytime soon.

 **Dawn Frost**

It was around twilight when I stumbled across Cloverpaw. The dark gray she-cat was laying beside the fresh-kill, her head rest heavily on her paws. A worn expression masked her features, like she'd just ran to the ThunderClan border and back and was exhausted.

Puzzled, I approached the apprentice. "Cloverpaw, are you alright?"

The she-cat lifted her head and then blinked, surprised. Warriors typically didn't concern themselves over measly apprentices. "Um, I'm fine… but thanks for asking, Spikefur." Her depressed tone indicated that she was anything but fine.

I sat down beside the apprentice, and our pelts brushed briefly. "Cloverpaw, if something's bothering you, you should tell someone."

But the young she-cat shook her head. "It's not important."

"If it's troubling you than it _is_ important," I pressed. "At least, _I_ think it's important."

Cloverpaw looked up at me again, green eyes bright with awe. I didn't mind the way she looked at me. "Really?"

"Of course," I replied. "Come on, what's wrong?"

She hesitated before launching into her explanation. "I visit Honeypaw everyday to ask how she's doing and what she's learning and I know that Jayfeather doesn't appreciate it when I burst in, but I just want to see my littermate! But today when I visited Honeypaw she was acting really strange and kept trying to rush our conversation so that I would leave and I kept pressing her trying to figure out what was wrong, and then Jayfeather showed up and told me that I should leave! I didn't try to argue with him because I did that once and Owlclaw scolded me because Jayfeather is a guest in ShadowClan and medicine cats deserve our utmost respect - _no matter how rude or grumpy they are_ \- so yeah, I left without making a big scene. But just now I went to see Honeypaw and figure out why she'd been acting so strange but Jayfeather stopped me, and he told me that I can't visit Honeypaw every single day anymore because I'm distracting and I talk too much and I'm too loud, and right now Honeypaw needs to focus all of her attention on her training, but I just…" she trailed off sadly. "I miss training with Honeypaw, even though she was a lousy apprentice. She was my best friend but now she doesn't even want to talk to me anymore."

For a moment I could only stare at Cloverpaw, wide-eyed and confused. "Oh, _wow,_ you talk really fast."

"Jayfeather said that too," Cloverpaw remarked, depressed.

I shook my head to clear it, and focused on the parts of the explanation that'd stood out most to me. So, Cloverpaw was hurt because Jayfeather said she couldn't visit Honeypaw anymore, and Honeypaw was acting strange.

"I wouldn't take anything Jayfeather says too personally," I meowed. "He's kinda notorious for being rude and grumpy."

"It's not Jayfeather who's bothering me," Cloverpaw muttered. "It's Honeypaw. I think-... I think she's growing bitter towards me because it's my fault she has to train as a medicine cat."

I blinked, startled. "What are you talking about? Honeypaw went after that fox by herself."

"But she wouldn't have gone after it if I hadn't of made fun of her," Cloverpaw replied solemnly. "I guess you didn't hear that part of the story; I was showing off my new battle move and Honeypaw called me a show-off, and so I started taunting her, and I said the only way she would ever become a warrior was if she managed to kill that fox…"

"Oh," I said lamely. "Uh, no, I guess that part of the story escaped me."

"When she was first injured I apologized to her," Cloverpaw continued, "and she accepted it, and she seemed really excited to start training as a medicine cat, but what if that's changed? What if she's decided she hates being a medicine cat and now she hates me?"

"Whoa," I suddenly meowed. "Honeypaw is your sister; she doesn't hate you! I doubt that's even the reason she's acting strange. Maybe her new training is a lot of pressure, and she's still trying to adjust?"

"Maybe," Cloverpaw agreed with a weak shrug.

My brow furrowed in thought. "Look, why don't you talk to Honeypaw about it? Tomorrow, instead of interrupting her and Jayfeather, why don't you offer to take her herb-hunting? You could talk then, and you would be helping her instead of hindering her."

Cloverpaw perked up noticeably at the suggestion. "Hey… _yeah_ , that could work. I should probably give her some space for a few days so that Jayfeather doesn't snap at me again, but maybe in a few days…?" The green-eyed she-cat looked at me for confirmation.

I smiled and nodded. "I think it would be smart to give her a few days. Until then you could start thinking about what you're going to say to her? If you want, I can help you plan it?"

Cloverpaw's vivid green eyes lit up. "That'd be great!" she exclaimed. Then, suddenly bashful, she added, "Thanks a lot, Spikefur."

I purred and flicked her ear with my tail. "It's no problem."

It really wasn't, I realized. Sure, Cloverpaw could probably talk an enemy warrior to death, and maybe she could be a bit too enthusiastic, but she seemed fun. And after this whole Dawnpelt/Crowfrost fiasco, I was ready for a bit of fun.

Cloverpaw purred loudly and thanked me one more time before scampering off towards her den. I watched her go for a moment, and found that I already sorta missed that ball of enthusiasm. And… I kinda missed the way she'd been looking at me, too. Like I was some sort of hero.

I realized it was the same way I wanted Dawnpelt to look at me.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

 _"ShadowClan has always been ruled by ambitious, arrogant fox-hearts. I see no reason to change that now..."_

Each word pierced my heart like an enemy warrior's strike. I wished I could forgot about my conversation with Rowanstar but it was stuck in my head. It just kept replaying itself, over and over again…

Rowanstar's opinion of me mattered, in a way that could only be rivaled by Whitewater's. He'd been my mentor; he taught me everything I knew. He knew my past and he understood what had made me… _me._

He'd sounded so _cold…_

I straightened my spine and glared challengingly at the sky. My tail lashed dangerously.

 _Who cares what Rowanstar thinks of me?_ I thought defiantly. _Who cares what any of them think of me? Ratscar, Spikefur, Smokefoot, Dawnpelt…_

 _They're all just jealous of me. They're jealous of everything I've accomplished, and everything I stand for. If they were me they would understand why I am the way that I am._

 _That's enough,_ my conscious snarled. _You're behaving like a spolid RiverClan kit! You don't deserve to remain the deputy of ShadowClan!_

 _On the contrary, Rowanstar made it sound like I'm the perfect cat for the position,_ I retorted. _Ambitious, arrogant, a fox-heart…_

Who was Rowanstar to tell me that I'd disappointed him? Who was Smokefoot to pretend I didn't exist? Who was Dawnpelt to call me a sorry excuse for a warrior? Who were any of them compared to me?

One day Rowanstar would pass, and when that happened I would become the leader of ShadowClan. I would be one of the four most important cats alive. I would have complete authority over ShadowClan, the most lethal Clan by the lake.

 _"You strut like you're StarClan's great gift to the Clans…"_ Because I _was_ StarClan's great gift to the Clans. But… but maybe more than that, even. Maybe I was a great gift to even _StarClan._

Well, not quite yet, but one day. When I was Crowstar, leader of ShadowClan. When I was brilliant, admired, invincible-

 _Invincible,_ I paused, as a smirk started to play across my lips. _Invincible… I like that._

One day I would be invincible.

Or maybe I already was.

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 **Question of the Day**

 **Where's the last place you went to vacation?**

 **#Mt. Airy, North Carolina**

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 **This chapter was a bit harder to write than the last few, but not unbearably so. It was really a matter of getting into Spikefur's head and figuring him out. I thought I had him pretty developed as a character, and maybe from Dawnpelt's POV I do, but I didn't have him quite as developed as I thought. He's a good cat though, and I enjoyed him. He's the complete opposite of Crowfrost, so it was fun to write something different.**

 ** _EDIT_ \- So far a few of you have commented that not much happens this chapter, plot-wise. You're right, nothing ground-breaking takes place, but I wanted to use this chapter as an opportunity to let you inside Spikefur's head, and to also give you an outsider's opinion of how Crowfrost and Dawnpelt are handling their split. But maybe even more than that… a ton of people have reviewed and asked, "How is Crowfrost still deputy after everything he's done?" I wanted to explain that, because it's a very good question.**

 **Crowfrost isn't still deputy because Rowanstar is bias (although… he is a little bias), but because Crowfrost is simply the best cat for the position. Rowanstar, while upset with him, isn't going to risk his Clan by letting feelings get in the way of his ruling.**

 **Before I close this out, I'd like to touch up on that final Crowfrost scene. I swear he isn't going to become a villain, but he has developed a rather large God-complex. That's how he's dealing with the split; he's refusing to acknowledge that a large part of it is his fault. But eventually, I'll force him to see the light once again ;)**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of them with a PM.**


	16. Part 1 - A Mask of Invincibility

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did then Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.** **Also, can we take a second to admire the new coverart, created by ? Thank you, Leafy!**

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 **Chapter Sixteen - Part 1 - A Mask of Invincibility**

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 **"So lets ignore each other, try to pretend the other doesn't exist, but deep down, we both know it wasn't supposed to end like this." - Tumblr**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

The freezing leaf-bare wind blasted me in the face and stung my eyes, but I forced myself to keep running and push through it.

 _Almost there,_ I told myself. _You're almost there, and... LEAP!_

I bunched my hind legs and then sprung. For what seemed like moons I was suspended in the air, as I sailed over the large, mossy log. Then I landed neatly on the other side. I didn't stop to collect myself or even take a breath; as soon as I'd landed, I was running again.

The path in front of me curved sharply and was dotted with broken tree limbs, logs and flat stones. Racing through the path was dangerous, but I continued to gain speed. I didn't hesitate before hurling myself over debris; the winding path proved to be more challenging, as my body wasn't built for the sharp twists. But I remembered what Sunstrike of WindClan had told me about running: it was easier to control your speed and your motions if you arched your spine. I took the method to heart and arched my spine as far as I could, even when my back ached. Soon I was racing through the path as well as any cat; no, I was _better_.

Eventually a huge pine tree came into view, right in the middle of my path. It was where I usually stopped, but as I rapidly approached it, I found that I didn't want to slow down.

 _What are you doing?_ My conscious cried. _You're going too fast!_

I didn't respond. Instead I narrowed my eyes and pumped my legs even fast until I was flying. Then, when I was only a fox-length away from the enormous pine, I sprung. I landed on the side of the pine, took a heartbeat to dig my claws in, and then I was climbing. I gripped the pine with more force than necessary as I clawed my way to the top, and relished in the way that my muscles coiled and uncoiled themselves.

Finally I reached the highest branch, where I perched myself, exhilarated. Adrenaline still pumped through my veins and mixed with my blood. I had boundless energy, I could run forever.

But after a few moments of sitting still and cooling off, it hit me just how exhausted I was. My muscles screamed with relief as they uncoiled, and my paw-pads ached. My spine was ready to split in half. My chest heaved as I gasped for air, desperate to refill my lungs.

 _You're insane,_ my conscious sneered. _Why you find pleasure in nearly killing yourself every morning, I will never understand._

 _I'm not killing myself; I'm becoming stronger,_ I corrected my conscious. Even in my own mind, my voice sounded tired. _Clearly my plan is working. Two half-moons ago, back when I first started this routine, I almost passed out from exhaustion, and I've lengthened my path since then. Now I just need a few minutes to cool off, even at the longer distance._

 _Why is this even necessary? You were already one of the strongest warriors in ShadowClan…_

 _But now I'm_ _ **the**_ _strongest warrior in ShadowClan,_ I thought. After a heartbeat I relented. _Alright, maybe Rowanstar is still strongest, but at this rate he won't be for much longer._

 _And what happens once you surpass Rowanstar?_

 _Then I'll work towards becoming the strongest warrior in all the Clans. No one will be stronger, faster, more agile, or more daring. They'll tell stories of me for seasons. And then, I'll be_ _ **invincible**_ _._

 _Insane,_ my conscious echoed. _You're absolutely insane._

 _Well, I suppose that's possible,_ I acknowledged. _After all, I do have conversations with a voice inside my head._

My conscious remained silent.

 **Dawn Frost**

It hadn't taken very long for the fruits of my labor to start showing up. After only a few days I was already more muscular, and my sleek black pelt was glossy with health. I looked fantastic, even though I didn't always feel so fantastic. These routines were taking a lot out of me. It would be much easier if I only dominated that path every few days, or even every other day, but I wasn't looking for "easy"; I was looking for results.

And maybe… well, if I couldn't admit it to myself than who could I admit it to? I was looking for a distraction. From the way my Clanmates looked at me, a mixture of so many emotions; from the way Smokefoot would pad past me without flicking my ear with his tail, or tossing me a smirk that hinted of a dare in the near future; from the conversation I'd had with Rowanstar; from the way fact that Spikefur was still padding faithfully after Dawnpelt.

 _Dawnpelt…_ On instinct, I glanced at my shoulder where she'd scarred it. She was my biggest reason for a distraction.

How much time had passed since our split? I liked to pretend that I didn't know the answer, but in reality I was painfully aware of the fact that it'd been almost three half-moons; only one more half-moon until it was officially one full moon. Last night was the Gathering, and if I ever thought that I was over Dawnpelt, last night had shown me just how wrong I was.

Word of our relationship had spread through the Clans like wildfire. I was used to she-cats gazing at me longingly on the Gather Island, and I was used to them approaching me, attempting to captivate me. I was used to toms staring at Dawnpelt as if she were the most gorgeous creature they'd ever laid eyes on (which, in all honesty, she probably was). I was used to toms trying to woo her and earn her affections.

I was used to all of this. I'd come to _expect this_ and _love it_ , but last night was almost unbarable.

The she-cats was suffocating and annoying, and it didn't help that Shimmerpelt - who I'd formed a genuine friendship with - hadn't been selected to attend that night. But even more annoying than the she-cats were _those StarClan-forsaken toms_. Great StarClan, they crowded around Dawnpelt like she was a piece of fresh-kill! They cooed to her and complimented her, and it took every inch of my self-control to not slaughter them all where they stood.

I wasn't Dawnpelt's mate anymore. I had no reason to be so jealous of her.

The thought kept me from killing those toms, but it didn't stop me from rejoicing when Heathertail and Breezepelt swooped in and rescued Dawnpelt from a night surrounded by lewd toms. Even if Breezepelt _did_ look like he'd rather be anywhere else than on that island.

But oh, how badly I'd wanted to be the one who ushered her away, and shot those toms dark, murderous glares. How badly I wanted to just announce that we were mates, and if I saw any tom so much as glance at Dawnpelt, I would rip their throats out and feed them to dogs.

I still loved her.

 _No, stop that,_ I hurried to scold myself. _Stop thinking about her. Dawnpelt knew about the Dark Forest ambush and she didn't warn anyone. She played along and pretended to be shocked when they infiltrated the camp. She's a traitor._

Dawnpelt was a traitor, and yet, I still loved her. Every time I organized patrols, may it be at dawn, dusk, or twilight, I was so tempted to put us on the same patrol, just so that I could be near her. I was so tempted to pull her aside in camp and say the words that I never got to say to her - _I love you_. The words that made my heart ache more than any ridiculous training routine ever could.

I was so tempted to apologize to her and beg her to take me back. To tell her that she had messed with my mind more than she would ever know. To tell her that I missed her more than I could put into words; that was the reason I'd refused to let Jayfeather treat the wound she gave me.

I didn't want it to heal and become invisible, like it'd never existed in the first place. I wanted it to scar; to give me something to remember her by, as morbid as it sounded. I'd only relented after three days of Jayfeather pestering me about it, telling me that I was a mouse-brain, and if I didn't let him treat it than it would become infected. But by the third day there was little Jayfeather could do for the scar, physically; without proper care it had scarred, and would forever mark my pelt.

 _I shouldn't have let it scar,_ I thought bitterly. _I should have let Jayfeather look at it the moment I stepped into camp. I'm trying to forget about Dawnpelt, for StarClan's sake!_

I was trying to forget about how warm her hazel eyes could be; how soft her fluffy, creamy-colored pelt was; how musical her laugh was. I was trying to forget about the fact that was more than just a pretty face. She was _intelligent_ and _brave_ and _bold_ and-

And she was _a traitor_ and-

And I was _in love with her_.

I snarled, frustrated, and then started racing along the path that would lead me back to camp.

 **Dawn Frost**

As I approached the camp I started to slow down, until I was no longer running. I needed some time to groom my ruffled pelt, and to school my features into a cool mask. It took me only a heartbeat to let the mask settle; I wore it often, nowadays.

Becoming invincible had morphed into some sort of obsession. No warrior had ever reached the level of invincibility. I would be the first, and I would be brilliant.

 _Invincible._ I just liked the _word_. It sounded powerful.

 _Sure,_ my conscious drawled, sarcastically. _That's the only reason you want to become invincible: because you like the word._

 _Alright, so maybe it runs deeper than that,_ I relented, with an annoyed roll of my eyes.

To be invincible was to reach the point where nothing could touch you, either physical or mental. I was working on the physical aspect now, hence the reason I raced along that path every morning (and because it provided an excellent distraction; it wasn't easy to sulk over my ex-mate while I had to worry about smacking into logs or tripping over branches). But the mental aspect… well, that was a bit more complex. How exactly did one strengthen their mind?

 _Well, I'd say splitting up with your mate and suffering the consequences puts you on the right path_.

Begrudgingly, I admitted that my conscious had a point. I'd endured some mental torture when I watched lewd toms try (and fail!) to woo Dawnpelt. And it certainly took a great deal of self-control to not just lose my composure and beg Dawnpelt to take me back (even though, _really,_ it should be the other way around).

Well. Maybe this split was something positive after all. Having my heart shattered made my mind stronger! Okay, I could live with that.

Anyway, that was sorta how my new mask tied in. To be invincible meant I had to stand alone, powerful and unmoving. I refused to let my Clanmates see how distressed mine and Dawnpelt's split had left me. To their knowledge, I was perfectly fine. Better than fine, even.

I organized patrols with that mask; I conversed with others with that mask. My expression was always cool and undaunted, as if I was made of stone and unbothered. I was careful to make sure it never wavered, especially when I made eye contact with Dawnpelt. And I couldn't let it harden, either. If my Clanmates noticed that my expression hardened whenever I gazed upon my ex-mate, they would know that she meant something to me.

I had to let them think that Dawnpelt was just another fling.

I had to let them think that it didn't bother me when Rowanstar spoke so coldly to me.

I had to let them think that I didn't agonise over the way that Smokefoot pretended I didn't exist.

I had to let them think that I was invincible.

With my mask set firmly in place and my sleek black fur groomed to perfection, I strolled into camp, ready to organize that morning's patrols.

 **Dawn Frost**

A few days later and my mask fell.

Snowbird started kitting.

"Are you sure there's nothing I can do for you?" Scorchfur pleaded with Jayfeather, as he disappeared into the Nursery again.

"You can stop being a pain-in-my-tail," Jayfeather retorted. "Crowfrost, I thought I told you to keep this mouse-brain out of my space!"

"Come on, Scorchfur," I purred, as I gently pushed him away from the Nursery entrance. "Let the medicine cat do his thing!"

"But he's blind!" Scorchfur protested. "What if he misses something important, or accidently steps on a kit?"

" _I heard that_!" Jayfeather growled from inside the den. "Just because I'm blind doesn't make me incompetent!"

Honeypaw padded past the distressed father-to-be, a bundle of herbs clamped securely in her jaws, and then disappeared into the hooded Nursery. Scorchfur's amber eyes widened. "Wait, Honeypaw gets to go into the Nursery and I don't?!"

"Honeypaw is Jayfeather's apprentice," I reasoned. "She'll have to learn how to deliver kits eventually."

Scorchfur's eyes narrowed. "Oh, so she's going to practice delivering kits with _my mate_. Sure, why not? It's not like you have to be a very skilled medicine cat to deliver a litter of cats!"

" _Shut-up, Scorchfur!_ " Snowbird suddenly screeched. " _You're stressing me out!"_

Scorchfur cringed, and his shoulder slumped forward. "I hate this," he mumbled. "I feel so useless!"

I laid my tail across the gray tom's shoulders, comfortingly. "Don't worry," I meowed. "Snowbird is in very capable paws. Jayfeather may be the most unpleasant tom in all the Clans, but he knows what he's doing."

I half-expected some sort of retort from the gray tabby medicine cat, but I received none, so I assumed he took my remark as a compliment.

Scorchfur exhaled heavily. "Right, of course he does. I just wish there was something I could do. I feel like a ball of nerves, like I'm about to just explode!"

"Well, _not exploding_ would be a great place to start," I meowed. "You wouldn't be much of a father if you were dead. And you don't want to leave these kits fatherless, do you?"

"No," came Scorchfur's serious mew. "Never."

"Why don't you start pacing?" I suggested. "Try and walk off some of that nervous energy?"

Scorchfur hesitated for a heartbeat, then nodded, stood to his paws, and started walking back and forth. Occasionally his pawsteps would increase until he was trotting, and then he would slow down again. His features were masked with anxiety and his eyes gleamed with unease.

"You know," I started cheerfully, in an attempt to distract my friend, "this almost doesn't feel real. I mean, we used to talk about this moment all the time; me, you, and Smo-" I stopped abruptly, but it was too late. Scorchfur had noticed my slip-up.

The gray tom looked towards me. "Smokefoot… where is he? I was so worried about Snowbird that I didn't even notice he was missing."

I scowled at my white paws. "He's in the Elders' Den. Probably noticed I was already with you - _like a good friend!_ \- and decided to not show up and support you in this life-changing event."

Scorchfur's amber gaze fell on the den in question. "We should let him know Snowbird is kitting," he murmured. "He'd want to be here."

"I wouldn't go in there if I were you," a new voice spoke up. I glanced backwards and came face-to-face with Blossomfall. "I saw Applefur go in there awhile ago, and neither of them have emerged since then."

I wrinkled my nose in disgust. "Thanks for the warning. Hey, wait a moment, didn't I assign you to a hunting patrol? What are you doing in camp?"

Because I was the best friend ever and I knew Scorchfur, I knew that being surrounded by cats while his mate kitted would only serve to further stress him out. So I'd sent several patrols out so that the camp was nearly empty. Only Smokefoot, Applefur, the medicine cats, and apparently Blossomfall, remained. The elders were also in camp, all conversing near the fresh-kill pile.

Blossomfall shrugged. "Tigerheart and I got into an argument after I startled a toad, and he told me that I might as well return to camp. So here I am." I had a hard time believing that the argumentative she-cat complied as easily as she claimed.

"Careful," Scorchfur teased, although his voice was strained. "If you and Tigerheart keep this up, you're going to end up like Crowfrost and Dawnpelt: mates."

"And then you're going to split up and have the entire Clan gossip about you," I added dryly.

Blossomfall wrinkled her nose, seemingly disgusted by the notion. "I don't think I have to worry about developing feelings for _Tigerheart_ anytime soon, thanks."

"Blossomfall," Jayfeather called. "Go to my den and grab a bundle of borage root!"

The tortoiseshell she-cat frowned. "Why do _I_ have to do it?" she demanded. "Isn't that why you have an apprentice?"

"I'll do it!" Scorchfur volunteered. "Um… what exactly does borage root look like?"

I snorted.

"Honeypaw is busy," Jayfeather growled. "The entire reason Bramblestar sent you with me was to help me, so _go grab some borage_!"

"Fine," Blossomfall snapped, as she strided tensely towards the Medicine Cat Den. "But would it kill you to say _please_?"

I grinned as I watched Blossomfall's twitching tail-tip disappear into the den, but it faltered when I realized that Scorchfur was staring at me. "What?"

"When are you and Smokefoot going to make up?" he asked, blunt and to the point.

I scowled. "As soon as he and Applefur split, and he admits that I was right."

Scorchfur exhaled, as if the argument exhausted him. "Crowfrost… Smokefoot is _happy_ with Applefur. Isn't that what's most important?"

I hated when cats worded it that way; as if I couldn't give two lizard-tails about Smokefoot's happiness. Of course his happiness mattered to me! I was closer to him than anyone else in ShadowClan, with the possible exception of Dawnpelt (although I wasn't very close to either of them at the moment). And that was why I couldn't condone his relationship with Applefur; she would only end up hurting him in the end. I just wish I wasn't the only one who could see that…

I opened my jaws to say something along those lines, but closed them again when Blossomfall brushed by. The ThunderClan she-cat dropped the herbs at the Nursery entrance. Jayfeather stuck his head out to grab them and then disappeared again. Blossomfall glared into the den and growled, "Would it kill you to say _thank-you_?!"

"Would it kill you to shut your jaws for two heartbeats?" Came Jayfeather's muffled retort.

"I have an idea," I spoke up. "Blossomfall, why don't you go stand guard by the camp entrance? As patrols start to return, send them on ridiculous tasks. If they try to argue with you then tell them the Clan deputy ordered it."

Blossomfall narrowed her eyes. "What kinds of ridiculous tasks?"

I shrugged. "Whatever you can think of. Tell them to not return until they kill that giant rabbit that's hiding in the territory."

The tortoiseshell she-cat blinked. "You have a giant rabbit hiding in your territory? You don't even share a border with WindClan!"

"I thought those foxes killed that rabbit?" Scorchfur added.

My shoulders slumped forward, sulkily. "Don't remind me," I grumbled.

Just then a blur of cream-and-gray streaked into the camp. "Frostcrowpaws!" the blur exclaimed. "I-"

"And take Ferretclaw with you," I ordered, a little too shrilly and a little too quickly.

Blossomfall shot the other warrior a dubious glare. "You've _got_ to be kidding me."

Ferretclaw looked disheartened. "But Crowfrostyclaws, I-"

"That's an order, Ferretclaw!" I exclaimed. The tom's mere presence made me feel as if I had the weight of the Clans resting on my shoulders, and suddenly I sympathised with Scorchfur a great deal.

Ferretclaw exhaled loudly. "Alright, if it's an _order_. Come on, Blossom-petal-fall."

As Blossomfall led the way to the entrance she growled, "I swear to StarClan, if you say one more word I'm going to-!"

I shot Scorchfur a smirk. "Am I great at being deputy or what?"

"Usually I would scold you for abusing your power," Scorchfur meowed, his voice still strained, "but in this case, I think I'll thank you instead."

"You're welcome," I chirped. "You know, most queens screech and howl when they kit, but Snowbird is being suspiciously silent. Maybe her kitting is going smoothly?"

My suggestion seemed to relieve the amber-eyed tom. "Yeah, you're right. Snowbird hasn't made very much noise, maybe-"

Suddenly a pain-filled screeched erupted from the Nursery and echoed throughout the camp. I flattened my ears against my head, and Scorchfur's pelt bristled along his spine.

"Then again, maybe the kitting just hadn't started yet," I mumbled.

"Snowbird!" Scorchfur cried. The dark gray tom darted towards the Nursery, but Jayfeather suddenly leaped forward to block his path.

" _Move_ ," Scorchfur snarled.

"Mouse-brain, what are _you_ supposed to do?" Jayfeather demanded. "Absorb her pain? Kit this litter yourself? You might be a capable warrior elsewhere, but here, you're a useless tom. Now, go sit beside your equally useless friend and don't make me come back out here again!"

" _Hey_!" I cried, highly offended. "That's the ShadowClan deputy you're talking about!"

Scorchfur hesitated for a few heartbeats, but when another earsplitting screech resounded from the den, he flattened his ears and stepped back, defeated. Jayfeather snorted and retreated into the den again, presumably to be with Snowbird.

Scorchfur sat down beside me. "How long does it usually take to kit?" he asked quietly.

"Depends," I replied with a shrug. "Some litters can take from sunrise until sunset."

The amber-eyed tom heaved a heavy sigh. "This is going to be a long, long day…"

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

" _Excuse me_?" I demanded incredulously. "Crowfrost wants us to do _what_?"

"Learn how to fly," came Ferretclaw's grim reply.

At first I thought Ferretclaw was just pulling our tails, but my hope was crushed when Blossomfall nodded in agreement. "He's jealous of ThunderClan for our outstanding tree-climbing abilities," she meowed, chest puffed out with pride. "So he's trying to find a way to oneup us. He thinks that once you master the art of flying, you won't have to worry about ThunderClan warriors dropping down on you from the trees."

"That's impossible!" Grassheart exclaimed shrilly. "We can't fly!"

"Birds can fly, can't they?" Ferretclaw challenged. "So why can't we?"

"Because we aren't birds!" I exclaimed. "We're _cats_!"

"Look, just because you _used_ to be mates with the deputy doesn't mean you're above his orders," Blossomfall meowed haughty. A low growl rumbled deep within my throat after she added, "Especially not now."

"Fine!" I spat. "We'll learn how to fly, and after that, I'm going to shred all of you!" I spun around and lashed my tail. "Come on guys, let's go find a stupid tree to jump off of."

My patrol, which consisted of Grassheart, Starlingwing, and Pinenose, all exchanged wary glances before the reluctantly followed me. They all knew better than to push me.

"Does Crowfrost really expect us to _fly_?" Starlingwing asked.

"Who knows what goes through that tom's head?" Pinenose replied dryly.

Grassheart shot me a sly glance. "What do you think, Dawnpelt? After all, you know him better than anyone else, don't you?"

"I think," I started tensely, "that when we find a suitable tree to climb, you're going to be the first cat to jump off of the limb and try to fly. And if you refuse to jump, then I'll _shove you_."

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

The yowls of pain grew louder and more frequent. My ears were constantly flattened against my head, and several times I had to leap to my paws and stop Scorchfur from bursting into the Nursery.

"Remember what Jayfeather said," I would remind him. "There's nothing you can do to help her right now."

"He also said that you're a useless tom," Scorchfur would point out.

I growled as I sat back down. "And he'll pay for that comment later."

Silence fell upon us, disturbed only by the Snowbird's screeches and yowls. Scorchfur cringed every time, and would clench his amber eyes shut. I felt a pang of sympathy for my friend, and pressed against him, comfortingly. Absently I wondered, had things turned out differently, how I would have reacted to Dawnpelt kitting…

A lot like Scorchfur, I imagined.

 _Probably worse,_ my conscious said.

 _Probably,_ I agreed.

In an attempt to distract my friend, I asked, "So, did you and Snowbird ever settle on names?"

He shook his head slowly. "She likes Leopardkit, Featherkit, and Birchkit. I like Forestkit, Brindlekit, and Dustkit."

"So what are you going to do?" I inquired.

"I suppose we're going to wait until they're born, and then see what names come immediately to mind."

"That's a good idea," I remarked. "Personally, I still like Crowfrostkit and Petalkit."

Scorchfur shot me a puzzled glance. "Petalkit?" he echoed.

A mischievous grin played across my lips. "Yep! In honor of your she-cat name: Scorchpetal!"

"That still isn't funny."

"I still find it hilarious."

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

"You _can't_ be serious," Grassheart demanded, as she gazed at the ground below. She was perched dangerously on the edge of a feeble tree limb, with fear _delightfully_ evident on her features.

I smirked up at her, safe on the ground. Pinenose and Starlingwing sat behind me. "I told you that you would be first, didn't I?"

"Dawnpelt, I can't fly!" Grassheart cried. Her voice was shrill with terror. "If I jump from this height I'll die!"

I rolled my hazel eyes. "Oh, don't be dramatic. ThunderClan apprentices jump from much higher heights!"

"That's because their bodies are adapt to it from seasons of conditioning," Pinenose mumbled. She sounded weary.

"I'll break my neck!"

"No you won't," I replied confidently. Underneath my breath I added, "I'm not that lucky."

Snowflakes started to drift from the sky. Inwardly I was delighted by the cold white flakes; Crowfrost would be _miserable_.

"Look, Grassheart," Starlingwing cried gleefully, "the snow will cushion your fall!"

"She won't have to worry about falling if she flies," I commented. Louder, I added, "Come on Grassheart, we don't have all day! If you don't jump within the next few heartbeats, I'm going to have to shove you!"

Privately, I hoped Grassheart would continue to stall. I wanted to fully utilize my revenge.

From behind me, I heard Starlingwing mutter to Pinenose, "Do you think Dawnpelt's time as Crowfrost's mate hardened her heart? She seems to have developed his sadistic streak."

"Starlingwing," I suddenly meowed, "once Grassheart jumps, you're next."

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

Snowbird must have been almost done, because her yowls had grown less frequent. Scorchfur continued to pace back and forth, tail-tip twitching. Meanwhile I'd trained my gaze on the Elders' Den.

The _actual_ elders still laid beside the fresh-kill pile. Shrewfoot and Kinkfur (ugh) were sharing a rather stringy rat, while Oakfur snoozed. Absently, I wondered how the chill in the air wasn't affecting them. It was certainly bothering me! I wasn't sure how the bitterly cold weather could get much worse…

Almost as if StarClan were listening in on my thoughts, those cursed white flakes began to fall from the sky.

"Are you serious?" I demanded. "It's _snowing_?!" Why StarClan, why?!

Scorchfur actually cracked a smile when a snowflake fell on his nose. "It's snowing while Snowbird is kitting. How appropriate."

"I _hate_ leaf-bare," I grumbled. "I hate being cold, I hate the snow, I hate the lack of prey-"

"I hate listening to you complain," Scorchfur added his own input.

"Yeah, well, I'm gonna keep complaining until I find something else to do. So suck it up, Scorchpetal."

"You could always apologize to Smokefoot," the dark gray tom suggested. When I tossed him a cool glare, he rolled his amber eyes and meowed, "I saw you staring at his den, Crowfrost. I can tell how miserable you are without him; you and Smokefoot have been inseparable ever since you were kits."

I narrowed my eyes. "You weren't even _alive_ when we were kits."

Scorchfur brushed my comment off with a flourish of his tail. "My point still stands. You and Smokefoot are both miserable right now, no matter what you claim. And it's going to stay that way until one of you sucks up your pride and makes up with the other."

A retort was poised on the tip of my tongue, but then I hesitated. _Curse Scorchfur and his sense of logic and reason!_

 _Scorchfur is my hero._

 _That doesn't surprise me in the slightest. You're very similar, except I don't hate him._

 _Just for the record, I also believe you should apologize to Smokefoot._

 _Just for the record, I don't care._

"Crowfrost," Scorchfur prompt. "You know what you have to do…"

But did I really _have_ to make up with Smokefoot? Like… _really_? I mean eventually we would make up with each other - that was unavoidable. We'd been through too much together to die with our brotherhood unrestored. But did that have to happen today? And… did _I_ have to be the one to apologize first? After all, it wasn't like I'd overreacted to Smokefoot's news, and it wasn't like I'd been the only one to throw a couple of shallow blows in the argument.

 _"I wonder what Dawnpelt would think of your lie?"_

 _"You would hold a grudge against a rat if it croaked like a frog…"_

 _"I suppose you know exactly what a mother's disappointment looks like, don't you?"_

I clenched my jaw. "I don't _have_ to do anything. If Smokefoot's so "miserable" then he can come apologize to me first."

Scorchfur groaned, exasperated. "Why do you insist on being so stubborn?"

"Hey," I protested hotly, "it takes two to fight! Why haven't you confronted Smokefoot?"

"I have," Scorchfur retorted dryly. "I actually confronted him first, because I thought he would be slightly more open-minded than you."

A sudden rush of curiosity prompted me to ask, "Oh yeah? And what did he say?"

"The exact same things as you."

I huffed, "Figures."

Scorchfur shot the Elders' Den a thoughtful look. "But maybe I could try again? It might take my mind off of-" a sudden, pained yowl interrupted the gray tom, "- _that,_ " Scorchfur finished weakly.

Before Scorchfur could go anywhere I stepped in front of him, and blocked his path. "I wouldn't go in there if I were you," I advised him. "According to Blossomfall, Applefur went in there at dawn and hasn't emerged since. They're, uh, probably doing a little kitten-making themselves…"

Scorchfur immediately sat back down, eyes locked on the Nursery entrance. "I think you just saved my life."

"You're welcome."

However, now that I thought about it, maybe someone _should_ interrupt those two. Even though the view wouldn't be pleasant, I was definitely considering bursting in there. And hey, I already had the perfect excuse to burst in; I could just say I was there to apologize to Smokefoot!

Just as I was about to jump to my paws and execute my brilliant plan, a sort of eerie silence fell over the camp. The elders had stopped conversing with one another; Blossomfall and Ferretclaw were as silent as the snow falling from the skies; but most notably, Snowbird was as silent as the dead.

The silence was unnerving for a few moments, but then Honeypaw poked her head out of the Nursery. I was immediately relieved to note that she wore a bright smile that was almost too big for her face.

"Congratulations, Scorchfur," she purred. "You're the father of two healthy kits; a tom and a she-kit."

I watched as the tension left Scorchfur's shoulders, and his muscles uncoiled from beneath his dark gray pelt. "And Snowbird?" he checked worriedly. "Is she okay? She sounded like she was in so much pain…"

Honeypaw stepped aside and gestured towards the inside of the Nursery. "Why don't you ask her yourself?"

Scorchfur didn't need to be prompted twice. Almost before the words finished leaving Honeypaw's mouth, the new father hurried inside the den, eager to check on his mate and meet his new kittens. I'd planned on staying back for a few moments, to give the new parents some privacy, but I didn't have enough self-control to wait that long. I entered the den only heartbeats after Scorchfur.

"Snowbird, love," Scorchfur cried, as he darted towards his queen's side. "How do you feel? Are you alright? Kitting didn't take too much out of you, did it?"

I just so happened to pause beside Jayfeather, who'd backed up a bit to let Snowbird breathe. When Scorchfur burst into the den and started asking questions, he rolled his blind blue eyes and grumbled, " _New fathers,_ " as if it were an insult. But I wasn't fooled; I smirked when I saw the ghost of a smile upon his lips.

Snowbird looked exhausted. Her sides heaved and she barely had enough strength to hold her head, but she purred drowsily when Scorchfur started to cover her ears with loving licks. "I'm just fine," she purred softly.

"You sounded like you were in so much pain," Scorchfur cringed, as his mind replayed the horrible sounds his mate had made. "I was so worried about you…"

Jayfeather scoffed. "Snowbird kitted quite easily, actually. She just so happens to be a very dramatic she-cat."

Snowbird blinked bashfully, but Scorchfur simply grinned. "Yeah, I seem to have surrounded myself with dramatic cats…" He shot me a pointed look, and I would have bet a moon of dawn patrols that he was thinking of Smokefoot as well.

I returned his grin. "You're so calm and level-headed that we have to balance you out; add some excitement to your life!"

"He was anything _but_ calm and level-headed when she was kitting," Jayfeather pointed out.

"Don't ruin the moment, Jayfeather," I rebuked him. "Just let it be…"

The silver tabby tom rolled his eyes, but didn't verbally respond. That was enough for me, and I returned my attention to the new parents.

Scorchfur had just stopped nuzzling and licking Snowbird's face, and now gazed at his kits with an expression of pure awe. I leaned forward and noted that there was one white kit, and another light gray kit with white patches. The little white kit was an exact copy of its mother, from its build to its coloring.

"So, which is the tom, and which is the she-kit?" Scorchfur asked softly, eyes trained on the squirming bundles of fluff.

Snowbird touched the white kit with her tail and murmured, "this one is the tom. The gray and white one is the she-kit."

Scorchfur nodded as he absorbed the information. He was silent for a few precious moments before he whispered, "They're both perfect. The tom looks exactly like you."

"I hope they have your eyes," Snowbird whispered, just as softly. She leaned into her mate, who rasped his tongue over her ears in response. My heart clenched as I watched them, as a hollow feeling started to build in my chest. The love that Scorchfur and Snowbird held for each other was reflected in their eyes, and in their kits. At that moment I knew that they couldn't have been any happier. I couldn't help but think that my parents didn't look at each other like that when I was born.

Honeypaw slipped into the Nursery with a bundle of herbs in her jaws. She dropped them at Snowbird's head and whispered something I couldn't quite pick up, but judging by Snowbird's smile it was some sort of congratulation.

"How is her training going?" I asked Jayfeather.

The silver tabby tom replied, "Good. She's got a great memory, and she seems to really enjoy her new duties; I think she just likes being good at something, for once."

"And her wounds?" I prompted.

"They're healing very well," he meowed. "If you study her, she walks with a bit of a limp, but that'll go away with time. The trauma seems to have mostly left her as well, although I doubt she'll ever be fond of foxes."

"Well then, it looks like we might _actually_ have something in common," I remarked. "After she had such a horrible warrior apprenticeship, I didn't think I we ever would."

Honeypaw still stood beside Snowbird and Scorchfur, seemingly fascinated by the newborn kits. If she heard my remark then she did a spectacular job of hiding her reaction. Jayfeather also kept his jaws clamped shut, and his eyes still trained on the new family.

After some time he stood up and started towards the exit. I spun around and watched him leave with wide, worried blue eyes. "Hey, where are you going?" I demanded, careful to keep my voice low, so as to not interrupt Scorchfur and Snowbird's moment.

Jayfeather paused, mid-step. "I'm going to get some fresh air," he replied sharply. "I've been cramped in this den all morning, and I'd like to enjoy my evening."

"What if something happens while you're out?" I pressed.

A slight smirk played across Jayfeather's lips. "You sound like Scorchfur, and these aren't even your kits." He shook his head. "Relax. I've already looked at the kits and they're perfectly healthy."

I narrowed my eyes. "Where exactly are you going? Blossomfall is standing guard, so if you plan on leaving camp you'll-"

"I don't need Blossomfall to escort me," Jayfeather replied sharply. "I already have another cat in mind."

"Oh yeah? Who-" but before I could finish my question Jayfeather had already left the den. I huffed, aggravated with the snappy medicine cat. _I'm be glad once Honeypaw is a full-fledged medicine cat and Jayfeather returns to ThunderClan. Blossomfall too._

I felt someone settle down beside me, and I glanced down only to come gaze to gaze with Honeypaw. She smiled, although she do so hesitantly. "Hi," she meowed meekly.

I raised an eyebrow. "Hey," I returned, unbothered by the suspicion I heard in my own tone. Between Honeypaw and her siblings, I'd interacted with Honeypaw the least. The only time I'd spoken to her was when I'd ridiculed her. "Did you want something?"

The golden tabby she-cat lowered her gaze, almost bashful. "I realized that I never told you 'thank-you'."

I blinked, confused. "For what?"

She raised her head to lock her gaze with mine. Her clear blue eyes were bright with a sort of freedom that they didn't hold when she'd been Ivytail's apprentice. "For saving my life, of course."

It took me a moment to recall the memory that Honeypaw was talking about. "You mean with the fox."

The blue-eyed she-cat nodded. "I was absolutely helpless, and the fox had already gotten Littlecloud… I would have been next, if you hadn't distracted it and led it away. So, thank you. If you hadn't of saved me then I would have died thinking that I was a lousy cat, and I never would have discovered my passion for healing."

Honeypaw's voice seemed to become stronger as she continued. "Being Jayfeather's apprentice has taught me so much. I feel more confident, and I feel wiser too. No… I _know_ I'm wiser. And I know this because I know that you don't like me or my siblings, but I used to think that was because you were a bad cat, but I don't think that way anymore; if you were truly a bad cat then you wouldn't have risked your life to save mine. Now I know that you don't like me because you don't like my parents, but that's okay, because you don't have to like me. You just have to let me treat your wounds and not argue with me when I confine you to camp." She finished her speech with a radiant smile.

I blinked. This was one of those rare moments when I was at a loss for words. This young, confident she-cat was much different from the one who I had mocked and scolded. "Uh…"

"And for what it's worth," Honeypaw added, "I think that you're a brilliant deputy. I also think that you're going to make a brilliant leader one day, although you still have to learn a few things before then."

This time I chuckled. _She's gotten gusty, hasn't she?_ "Do you have anymore wise words for me?" I joked.

"Yes," Honeypaw meowed. "You need to make up with Dawnpelt. You're both fooling yourselves if you think that you're ever going to be truly happy without each other. If you ever take another she-cat as your mate you're going to be miserable, because she'll never make you feel the same way that Dawnpelt did."

And with that, Honeypaw returned her attention towards Scorchfur, Snowbird, and their kits. Scorchfur was curled around his mate and kits, and had twined his tail with Snowbird's. Snowbird leaned into his side and rest her head on his paws, with one paw scooped protectively around her kits.

They looked happy; peaceful.

And at that moment, I suddenly felt very, very lonely.

 _This is what being invincible feels like, Crowfrost. I hope it's worth it._

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **Who do you think will apologize first between Crowfrost and Smokefoot? Likewise, who do you think will apologize first between Crowfrost and Dawnpelt?**

 **#My lips are sealed!**

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 **So, this chapter was actually not meant to be split into two parts. However I've been slowly working on it for a few weeks, and I'm about to go on vacation for a week, and I wanted to get this out to you guys. I really liked the closing line in this chapter, and I thought it was the perfect place to cut it off anyway. So the next chapter - part 2 - won't be very long at all. Most likely it will end up being the shortest chapter in DF. But hey! That just means a shorter wait :)**

 **Moving on, I really liked this chapter. I had the beginning plotted for awhile, and Snowbird finally kitted! There are also a few really funny scenes IMO, and that wasn't intended at all, but I like how it all came together. As I told some of you who asked, Crowfrost is having just as hard of a time as Dawnpelt is, he just hides it better. And this chapter we finally got to see that he really is miserable without her, and Smokefoot too, for that matter. All of this is touched upon again next chapter.**

 **For those of you who don't know, I'm still running the poll contest on my profile! The next set was just updated :)**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I will be responding to each and every one of** **them with a PM. However, I would just like to apologize to those who didn't receive a PM last chapter. I got loaded down with homework so I didn't have the time to respond to a lot of you, but I'll do better with that on this chapter.**


	17. Part 2 - Turns Out, I'm Not Invincible

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did then Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.** **Also, can we take a second to admire the new coverart, created by ? Thank you, Leafy!**

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 **Chapter Sixteen - Part 2 - Turns Out, I'm Not Invincible**

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 **"It takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart." -Finnick Odair, Mockingjay**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

I led my weary patrol back to camp, determined to claw Blossomfall and Ferretclaw's eyes out once I reached the entrance. And hey, maybe while I was at it I would give Crowfrost another scar, too. After all, apparently _he_ was the one who'd ordered us to _learn how to fly._

 _He is so dead,_ I thought darkly. _They all are._

"I'm never going to climb a tree ever again," Grassheart announced for the hundredth time.

"We heard you the first hundred times, Grassheart," Starlingwing snapped. "Quit repeating yourself!"

"I'm repeating myself because I don't think you understand how serious I am," the she-cat retorted. In her defense, Grassheart probably really had no intentions of climbing another tree for as long as she lived. Out of all of us, I forced Grassheart to jump from the trees the most. I'd even kept my promise and shoved her off the branch the first few times...

Pinenose sped up so that she was padding alongside me. "You're going to kill them once we get back to camp, right?" she checked. I didn't even need to ask who "them" was to know who she was talking about.

"Of course."

"Mind if I help?"

I thought that over for a few heartbeats before I finally meowed, "Fine, but I want Crowfrost for sure. You can have your pick between Ferretclaw and Blossomfall."

"I want Ferretclaw," Pinenose meowed without hesitance. "If I can't have Crowfrost, then his worshipper is the next best thing."

"Then I'll take Blossomfall as well," I meowed. "Maybe I'll let Tigerheart get a few blows in as well; StarClan only knows how badly he's wanted to shred her."

Pinenose laughed, and then I found myself laughing with her. I didn't even realize I was laughing until Starlingwing asked how we could do anything but complain about how sore our bodies were from flinging ourselves off of tree limbs.

Laughing… felt _good_. It felt _really good_ , actually. I tried to remember the last time I'd laughed, and it was with a sinking heart that I realized the last time I had laughed was when I was with Crowfrost. He'd just finished telling me a story, and it wasn't even supposed to be funny, but I had laughed so hard that I couldn't breath anymore…

 _Great StarClan, I miss him so much…_

I shook my head to try and chase the thought away. _No, don't think like that! Remember what he did to you! Muster your rage and then kill him when you return to camp!_

With that mindset it didn't take me very long to muster up the required anger and resentment. Crowfrost had certainly planted some bitter seeds within my heart. He'd spent entire nights softly cooing to me and telling me how much I meant to him, grooming my pelt and nuzzling my neck, only for me to find out that he'd been meeting with another she-cat behind my back.

And then there were old grudges that had surfaced once we'd split. Like when he saved me from drowning and humiliated me (I still wished he would have just let some RiverClan tom save me); or when he gave me so much trouble while we mentored Hailpaw; or when he'd mocked me behind my back, and inspired my depressed slump.

There was also that time we'd argued, and he'd told me that I was "just as heavy as a monster". Yeah, I hadn't forgotten about that!

My newfound anger fueled my pawsteps, and soon I was striding purposely through the forest, despite my aching joints. _Maybe Grassheart has a point. If I never climb another tree again, it'll be too soon._

Pinenose sped up as well, although Starlingwing and Grassheart lingered a few mouse-lengths behind us. They were too sore to keep up, and didn't have the same motivation that forced Pinenose and I onwards.

Camp was only a few fox-lengths away when Pinenose came to an abrupt halt. "Do you smell that?" she asked, as she continued to scent the air.

I frowned but copied her actions, and then blinked. "It's the other patrols."

Starlingwing, who'd finally caught up, also seemed confused. "But these are the dawn patrols, and it's almost evening! Why is everyone still on patrol?"

Suddenly the bushes started to rustle, and then emerged one of the hunting patrols. Ratscar was at the head of the patrol, and Olivenose and Ashpaw stood behind him. Surprise flickered in Ratscar's eyes. "Dawnpelt?" he cried. "What's your patrol doing still outside camp?"

"I could ask you the same thing," I replied. As my gaze settled on his pelt, along with his patrol members, I frowned. "And why in the name of StarClan are your pelts all covered in snow and marsh?"

"Why are there tree limbs in your pelts?" Olivenose challenged. I had to bite back a stinging retort and glance away from my former best friend; she was still furious with me for taking Crowfrost as my mate.

"Ratscar," Pinenose murmured, as she took a step towards her mate. "You look as if you rolled around in the snow!"

"Something like that," Ashpaw mumbled underneath her breath.

I frowned and opened my jaws to interrogate the young she-cat, but snapped them shut again when another patrol entered in the clearing, this time led by Tigerheart. Stoatfur, Waspstripe and Hailpaw followed him. They were all breathing heavily and looked as if they'd just raced to the lake and back.

"What happened to _you_?" I exclaimed, alarmed. "You're all out of breath!"

"Are ThunderClan attacking?" Starlingwing demanded.

Tigerheart shook his head, but it took him a few more seconds to gain enough breath to reply, "W-we don't want to t-talk a-about it…"

"I kinda ju-just want to d-die," Waspstripe panted, before he flopped down into the fresh snow.

" _Waspstripe_!" Starlingwing and Grassheart chorused, before they darted over to the tom's side. I blinked, taken back by Grassheart's concern for Waspstripe. It was clear that the ginger-and-brown tom had feelings for Grassheart, but Grassheart was only using him to make Crowfrost jealous… wasn't she?

I glanced at Hailpaw, a silent question in my eyes. _Are you okay?_

Hailpaw gave the slightest nod of his head. _I'm fine._

We hadn't talked much ever since 'the split'. I'd completely stopped going out with Crowfrost and our apprentice, and Crowfrost never seemed to care. He didn't confront me about it or invite me to join their sessions. Still, I wished that my drama with Crowfrost hadn't affected my relationship with Hailpaw…

First Honeypaw and now Hailpaw. It seemed like I was drifting apart from all of my apprentices. Who was next? Cloverpaw?

Almost as if on cue, Cloverpaw charged through a cluster of bushes and skid to a halt in the center of the clearing. Her bright green eyes widened when she caught sight of her Clanmates. "Uh, Owlclaw," she called over her shoulder, back into the bushes, "Spikefur was _right_."

Then emerged Ivytail's hunting patrol, which consisted of Owlclaw, Spikefur, and evidently, Cloverpaw. Ivytail looked absolutely bewildered when she entered the clearing, but Spikefur only rolled his eyes, as if he'd expected the sight. Than again, according to Cloverpaw he _did_ expect it.

"You mean you haven't returned to camp yet either?" Stoatfur inquired.

"No," Spikefur dryly replied. "We haven't been back to camp ever since Crowfrost dismissed us"

"You neither?" Olivenose asked, surprised.

"Have _any_ of you returned to camp since dawn?" Ratscar demanded.

Slowly we all exchanged glances with one another, and then we shook our heads.

"Hold on," I started, as a wild theory came to mind. "Did… did Crowfrost tell you to learn how to fly, too?"

Owlclaw yelped, "He told you to learn how to fly?"

"Well, that explains the pine limbs stuck in your pelts," Stoatfur observed.

"Oh yeah?" Grassheart challenged, suddenly aware of just how messy her pelt must've been. "Well what did tell _you_ to do?"

"We're not talking about it," Tigerheart growled.

Pinenose shot Ratscar a questioning glance, and the dark brown tom sighed. "He told _us_ to dig a tunnel into ThunderClan's territory…"

"And that's why you're covered in snow and dirt," I finished, and wrinkled my nose.

"What about you?" Starlingwing asked Ivytail. "Did he give you some ridiculous task?"

The senior she-cat glared at her paws, as if she was ashamed with herself. "He told us to banish leaf-bare."

"'Banish leaf-bare'?" Olivenose echoed, puzzled. "What does that even mean?"

"According to Ferretclaw and Blossomfall," Owlclaw started dryly, "it means we have to make lizard-brains out of ourselves until it stops snowing. Chase our tails, yowl as loudly as we can, take turns jumping over each other…"

Cloverpaw shook some snow from her pelt and then added, "It didn't work, obviously."

" _Obviously_ ," Spikefur murmured underneath his breath, and then smirked when Cloverpaw shot him a glare.

I blinked, taken back by their interaction. I wasn't even aware that Spikefur knew _how to_ smirk! Much less that Spikefur and Cloverpaw had ever spoken to each other, but their interaction seemed very relaxed… friendly, even. _When did that happen?_

Ratscar scoffed. "He told you to 'banish leaf-bare' and you actually listened to him?"

Ivytail growled, "At least we didn't try to dig a tunnel into ThunderClan! And _they_ ," she gestured towards us with a lash of her tail, "tried to learn how to fly!" Ivytail glared at me, as if she were angry with me specifically. Considering I was her former apprentice, she probably was. "How did you even attempt that? Did you climb trees and fling yourselves off branches?"

"Some of us did that," Grassheart meowed bitterly. "Others were _pushed_."

Horror masked Waspstripe's expression. " _Someone pushed you out of a tree_?! _Who_?"

"Alright Stripes," I started hastily, "We've all shared our stories. Now it's your turn."

Tigerheart glared at his paws and grumbled, "I already said I don't want to talk about it."

"Oh, come on," Olivenose scoffed. "Whatever you did, it can't be any more humiliating than trying to fly."

"Hey!" Starlingwing cried. " _You_ tried digging a tunnel into ThunderClan."

"You have absolutely no room to judge us," Pinenose added with a flick of her tail.

"Tigerheart," Ivytail prompt. "What did Crowfrost make your patrol do?"

My littermate exhaled a long, heavy sigh. "He told Blossomfall and Ferretclaw to… to tell us to catch a rare, purple-tailed squirrel."

Silence.

"A purple-tailed squirrel?" Owlclaw echoed, frowning. "Like… like a blue-tailed lizard?"

"We figured it was something like that, yeah," Stoatfur muttered, as she shuffled her paws.

"Hold on," Ratscar demanded, a look of incredulousness on his features. "There's no such thing as a purple-tailed squirrel, and even if there was one it wouldn't be in our territory! Do you mean to tell me that you spent your time chasing a creature that doesn't even exist?!"

"I knew we should have refused to tell you guys," Tigerheart mumbled.

"Tigerheart," I started, exasperated. "Why would you waste your time chasing something that Crowfrost clearly made up?"

"Because we thought it was real, at first!" Tigerheart protested.

"You thought there was such thing as a purple-tailed squirrel?!" Ivytail demanded. "If you've never seen such a thing in your entire life, why would you suddenly believe in their existence?"

Waspstripe's eyes widened with desperation. "They said it was rare!" he exclaimed, as if that excuse justified their stupidity.

"Great StarClan," Spikefur muttered. "You're all completely lizard-brained!"

Hailpaw, the only patrol member to have not defended himself, looked absolutely ashamed.

"Look," Tigerheart growled, "we ran all over this territory looking for that dumb squirrel-"

"You mean the one that doesn't exist?" Ratscar interrupted him.

"-And we're all exhausted," Tigerheart finished, after he shot Ratscar a cold look. "So if you wouldn't mind, could we save the mocking for another time? Possibly after I've had a nap?"

"And maybe a nice, fat toad?" Waspstripe added longingly.

I snorted. "This isn't new-leaf!"

"You'll be lucky if you can find even a _lizard-tail_ in all this snow," Pinenose remarked. "It's really starting to pile up; this must be the blizzard the elders were predicting…"

"Fine then, just a nap," Waspstripe relented, disappointment evident in his features.

Ivytail had started padding towards the camp again. "Come on, before this snow blurs our vision and we can't see the path anymore," she ordered. Cats stood to their paws to follow her, and a frown started to play across my lips as everyone seemed to pair off so seamlessly.

Ratscar and Pinenose loosely twined their tails as they walked, and Grassheart wore an almost _concerned_ expression as Starlingwing nudged Waspstripe to his paws. Olivenose didn't even shoot me a glance as she followed the patrol, and was soon joined by Owlclaw. I considered falling into step next to Hailpaw so that we could chat, but he was already padding close beside Ashpaw. The she-cat whispered something in his ear, and Hailpaw purred softly.

I looked around for Spikefur, and found that he was deep in a conversation with Cloverpaw. I traded my frown for a more puzzled expression when Spikefur laughed at something, and Cloverpaw rolled her bright green orbs. Cloverpaw's enthusiasm had always made her seem a bit immature, but as she walked alongside Spikefur she seemed to blossom into the young she-cat that she was. _She and Hailpaw only have a few more moons until they're made warriors,_ I realized. Where had all the time gone?

I stayed rooted to the cold, snowy ground as I watched my Clanmates forge onwards. My heart pounded against my chest, slowly, painfully. As my Clanmates laughed and purred and smiled affectionately at one another, I realized that the void in my heart was _loneliness_.

 _I miss Crowfrost,_ I thought, for what seemed like the hundredth time. I'd had that thought more times than there were stars in the sky.

It wasn't fair. I used to have a mate who made me feel like the only she-cat in the world, who made me forget about all my cares. I thought I had a future with Crowfrost. I thought that one day, when our relationship was no longer a secret, that we could look at each other so openly in love. I thought that we could raise our own family…

It just wasn't fair. Why did Crowfrost have to have an affair with that RiverClan she-cat? Why did he have to ruin everything? Why did I have to keep my mouth shut about the Dark Forest invasion? Why did I have to ruin everything?

Why did the stars still shine so brightly in the twilight sky? Why did the breeze still ruffle my pelt? Why did sun still rise behind the mountains every morning? Why didn't everything just stop when Crowfrost and I split?

 _I sound just like him,_ the realization struck me like a lightning bolt. Here I was, scolding the world for not grieving with me when things didn't go my way. When had I become so immature? When did Crowfrost have the chance to influence my thoughts so strongly?

It seemed like these days, all I ever had were questions that I couldn't answer myself.

"Dawnpelt," A voice called, and I blinked as I was jerked from my thoughts. I could vaguely recognize Tigerheart's dark brown tabby pelt against the hurricane of snowflakes. "Come on!"

I shook my head in a feeble attempt to clear my mind, and then called back that I was coming. As I flattened my ears against my head to shield them from the snow, I thought about how lonely I felt, and about how tempted I was to just forget everything that'd happened and beg Crowfrost to take me back. Then I wondered if he felt the same way, and my heart sank even deeper inside my chest.

Of course he didn't. To Crowfrost, I was just another meaningless fling.

Sometimes I wondered if that tom was even capable of loving someone more than he loved himself.

But the way he used to look at me, with that special gleam shining in his frosty-blue eyes… that had been _real_. That had meant _something_.

But all it meant now was that if he did miss me, even just a bit, then he was doing a fantastic job of masking it.

He was pretending he didn't miss me. I was pretending that I didn't care. Maybe we were making ourselves miserable by ignoring each other, but we were too stubborn to do anything else.

Pride, I realized, was the most dangerous weapon that one could wield.

 **Dawn Frost**

"Ferretclaw, Blossomfall, _move_ ," Ratscar snarled.

The two warriors were both stubborn, however, and only looked coolly at the mass of ShadowClan cats in front of them. If anything their eyes seemed to harden with determination. "Why should we?" Ferretclaw demanded.

"Because," I started dryly, "in case you haven't noticed, we're standing in the _middle_ of a _blizzard_!"

"Of course we've noticed," Blossomfall scoffed. "In case _you've_ forgotten, Jayfeather's the only blind cat in ShadowClan."

"Ugh!" Olivenose groaned. "Blossomfall, you're not even apart of ShadowClan! Why do you care?!"

The tortoiseshell she-cat shrugged. "Because I still have to obey Crowfrost's orders, no matter what Clan I belong to. And he gave us strict orders to make sure that none of you enter the camp until Snowbird's done kitting."

"Whatever," Tigerheart scoffed. "Just admit it: you're bossy and rude and you enjoy being able to tell us what to do, _ThunderClan scum_."

I, like everyone else I'm sure, expected Blossomfall to explode and start shrilly-proclaiming that she was neither bossy nor rude, nor was she "ThunderClan scum". But instead of creating a scene Blossomfall met Tigerheart's gaze and asked, coldly, "I see none of your patrol have any prey, Tigerheart. Out of curiosity, how much time did you waste before you realized that there's no such thing as a rare, _purple-tail squirrel_?"

"Roughly the majority of the morning," I heard Waspstripe mutter bitterly.

Tigerheart growled and shoved his muzzle forward. "You rotten piece of crowfood-"

" _I'm_ the piece of crowfood?" Blossomfall demanded incredulously.

"Great StarClan, they flirt just like Dawnpelt and Crowfrost did!" Ratscar exclaimed, exasperated.

I shot the scarred-tom a heavy glare. "That _wasn't_ how we flirted!"

"Sure it wasn't," Stoatfur snorted, sarcastic.

"I'll believe that when hedgehogs fly," Starlingwing added.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing! Did my Clanmates actually believe that Crowfrost and I had been in a relationship the entire time? Even before Hailpaw was made an apprentice? Those arguments had been _real_! Did they honestly believe that we'd only argued so much in the past to cover-up our secret relationship?

Somehow my gaze eventually met Olivenose's, and when it did she lowered her head and glared furiously at her paws.

Yes. That was exactly what they believed.

Meanwhile in the background, Tigerheart and Blossomfall continued to argue.

"Just you wait," Tigerheart snarled. "As soon as I'm done confronting Crowfrost about these lizard-brained orders he gave us, I'm going to _shred you_!"

"What's going on out here?" a new voice demanded. Despite the fact that Crowfrost sounded furious my heartbeat still sped up at the sound of his voice. "We're in the middle of a blizzard and you're all squawking like sparrows!"

Then the black and white tom seemed to really take in our appearances. He wrinkled his nose and asked, "Great StarClan, what happened to all of you?"

"Don't act lizard-brained!" Owlclaw exclaimed.

"I hate to break it to you, but he's not acting," Pinenose muttered.

Spikefur looked resentfully at the ShadowClan deputy. "As if you don't already know," he scoffed. "You're the one who sent us to "banish leaf-bare"!"

Crowfrost blinked, caught off guard. "Banish _who_ now?"

"And you sent us to dig tunnels into ThunderClan territory!" Ashpaw chimed in.

"Dig tunnels _where_?"

"You ordered us to learn how to fly!" Pinenose cried.

"Learn how to… _what_?!"

"And we," Stoatfur started, "were forced to hunt for the rare, purple-tailed squirrel."

"That… that doesn't even exist!"

Tigerheart rolled his eyes. "Wow, nothing gets past you, does it?"

Crowfrost shook his head, obviously confused. It was almost like he honestly had no idea what we were talking about, except… he had to! He gave us the orders!

"I have no idea what any of you are talking about," he meowed. "I never ordered you to-..." he paused, and then a smirk started to play across his lips. He turned to look at Blossomfall and Ferretclaw and simply said, "Oh."

My brow furrowed. "'Oh'? And what's _that_ supposed to mean?"

Crowfrost didn't even glance at me. "It means _I_ didn't order you to do _anything_. Blossomfall and Ferretclaw are the ones who came up with those ridiculous tasks."

Blossomfall shrugged, nonchalant, but her own smirk betrayed herself. "Only because you ordered us to do that much."

"Did we do well?" Ferretclaw asked, as he bounced towards his favorite cat.

Crowfrost stepped backwards, but still nodded. "You did pretty good. I really like the "banish leaf-bare" idea, although," he glanced ruefully at mound of snow around his paws, "it clearly didn't work."

"Hold on," Olivenose started, a look of puzzlement on her features, "you ordered them to come up with ridiculous tasks to keep us busy? _Why_?"

The sleek black tom rolled his icy-blue eyes. "Because Snowbird started kitting and you know how anxious Scorchfur gets, I figured that-"

"Wait a moment," Pinenose exclaimed, "Snowbird went into labor?!"

Crowfrost blinked, as if he'd somehow forgotten about that piece of news. "Oh, yeah. She actually just finished a moment ago. Anyway, I figured-" but Crowfrost never got the chance to finish his sentence. Suddenly everyone was eager to meet ShadowClan's newest members, and they all pushed past him and darted towards the Nursery.

Crowfrost looked absolutely offended. "You know," he called after them, "warriors used to actually _respect_ their deputies!"

"Deputies used to demand their respect," I meowed icily. My former-mate glanced back at me, irritation agleam in his frosty-blue eyes.

"Is that so?" he asked, uninterested. "What in StarClan's name happened to your pelt? It's a mess."

"I had to try and fly, remember?" I growled.

Crowfrost shrugged. "I already told you, that wasn't my idea. It was Blossomfall and Ferretclaw's." Then his eyes softened just a bit. He took a step towards me and asked, "But… are you okay? You're not injured?"

His concern caught me off guard. What happened to ignoring and despising each other? "I'm fine," I replied curtly.

But Crowfrost wasn't convinced. "Are you _sure_?" he pressed, even though he shouldn't have cared. "You don't need to see a medicine cat, or-?"

"For StarClan's sake, she said she's fine, Crowfrost!"

The creamy-colored fur bristled along my spine. Jayfeather stepped through the camp entrance, blind blue eyes trained solely on myself.

Crowfrost's eyes hardened once again. "I thought you said you were leaving?" he asked, dryly.

"I am," Jayfeather replied. "But first I wanted to talk to some of your elders about where I could find a specific herb. And now, I need that escort."

Crowfrost gestured to the camp with his tail; an angry sort of motion. "Well, Blossomfall seems to think that she's done with her duties guarding the camp, so I suppose you can-"

"I wasn't talking about Blossomfall," Jayfeather interrupted the deputy. "I was talking about Dawnpelt."

My eyes widened, horrified. " _Me_?" I cried.

" _Her_?" Crowfrost sounded just as shocked. "Why would you want _Dawnpelt_ as an escort, of all cats?! What, are you going to try and frame _her_ for a murder now?"

"I never framed anyone!" I protested. _Right, because that's what I should be worrying about right now._

Jayfeather scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous, Crowfrost. I just want to speak with Dawnpelt while I collect a herb."

Crowfrost narrowed his eyes. " _I'm_ the ridiculous one?" he demanded. "You're the one about to go herb-hunting in the _middle of a blizzard_!"

"And the blizzard is only going to get worse, so we best be on our way," Jayfeather retorted with a flick of his tail. Then he looked back at me with such intensity in his eyes that it nearly took my breath away. "Are you going to come with me or not, Dawnpelt?"

I hesitated. Crowfrost was staring at me, unwaveringly, as if he could _will_ me to refuse Jayfeather's offer. Frankly I didn't even want to share a territory with Jayfeather, much less follow him into the middle of a blizzard, but there was a soft voice in the back of my head that told me to give him a chance.

"I'll go with you," I finally answered.

"What?!" Crowfrost snarled. "Are you _insane,_ Dawnpelt?!"

"Anyone would have been driven to insanity after being your mate," Jayfeather retorted, before I could say anything. Then he started surely into the pines, as if he knew the territory by heart. "Let's go, Dawnpelt. I haven't got all day!"

My lips curled as I watched him forge onwards, and the white snowflakes started to engulf his silver-tabby frame. If I didn't leave soon then I would lose him. _Maybe Crowfrost is right. Maybe I am insane._

I turned around to give Crowfrost some sort of farewell, but when I did my heart sank.

He was already gone.

 **Dawn Frost**

I was sure that Jayfeather had an ulterior motive for bringing me herb-hunting in the middle of a blizzard, and I wondered how close Crowfrost's guess was.

Even though the question was persistently nagging at my mind, I managed to keep my jaws clamped. I knew Jayfeather was waiting for me to ask about his reasoning and I wasn't about to give him that kind of satisfaction.

So we trudged on in silence as the harsh wind blasted us in the face. The snow blurred my vision and made my paw pads ache, but I gritted my teeth and pressed onwards. If I couldn't stand a little snow then what kind of warrior was I?

"You're durable," Jayfeather finally broke the silence. He had to speak loudly to be heard over the storm.

"I'm a warrior," I growled.

"Are you sure about that?" Jayfeather shot back. I had to bite my tongue to keep from retorting. Being around the blind medicine cat was enough to test my patience, but actually talking to him was enough to make me consider murder.

Whether or not I was going to murder him or kill myself remained to be seen.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

I sat in front of the Nursery entrance like a guard. Scorchfur and Snowbird were taking a well-deserved nap, and by StarClan I was going to make sure that no one disturbed them even if there was another Dark Forest ambush.

Although, I wasn't pleased with the circumstances that I had to sit in. I mean, a _blizzard_ of all things? _Really_?

If this was StarClan trying to show off their sense of humor, I wasn't impressed.

I glared up at the sky, and looked at the _evil_ snowflakes with unmasked hatred. Great StarClan, how I _despised_ leaf-bare and all the evil that came with it!

A lack a prey, a lack of warmth. Bitterly freezing wind, dreary landscapes, numb paws and frosted whiskers. Snowstorms, not unlike this one. But perhaps worse of all was the memories that I associated with leaf-bare, and the cold in general.

Memories of starvation, illness, weakness, and death. There was something about leaf-bare that brought out the worst in cats. It brought out the worst in Kinkfur and drove her nearly insane. It brought out the worst in me, and I turned my back and those who I'd held dear.

My gaze drifted until it fell on the camp entrance. Just awhile ago I'd stood there with Dawnpelt, and for a few moments things had almost seemed normal. We'd snapped at each other, but then there was the overwhelming desire to make sure that she wasn't hurt.

 _Of course she's hurt,_ my conscious scoffed.

 _She didn't act like it. She wasn't limping or anything._

 _Lizard-brain,_ _ **you**_ _hurt her! More than any battle wound ever could._

I lashed my tail. Suddenly I was reminded of why exactly I'd hurt her. _She's a traitor. She may as well trained in the Dark Forest with the rest of them._ Pinenose, Ratscar, Grassheart, Applefur, Starlingwing, Tigerheart… _Dawnpelt…_

 _Crowfrost, sometimes you amaze me. You're the only cat alive who would make himself miserable over a petty grudge. First you lost your brother, and now the love of your life._

 _Sometimes you have to make sacrifices. Smokefoot will understand one day, and Dawnpelt… she'll realize that actions have consequences._

 _And you? What will you gain from this torture?_

 _I won't have anyone to hold me back. I'll be invincible._

 _So you're still chasing after that nonsense… Crowfrost, you don't understand what you must do to achieve such a status. But maybe one day you will, and if that day ever comes, just know that I'm sorry._

 _Don't pity me. It'll be worth it._

 _I sincerely hope so._

 **Dawn Frost**

The silence that built between Jayfeather and myself could be described with many words: awkward, uncomfortable, tense, borderline unbearable.

The thing about silence is that it gives you time to think and reminiscence, and while sometimes that's exactly what you need, other times it's the complete opposite. Sometimes too much thinking does more harm than good.

The blizzard reminded me of too much. It reminded me of Crowfrost. Of how passionately he hated the cold and snow, and everything leaf-bare. Of that time we played in the snow, and I thought that our love was strong enough to last forever. Of the time he was just a young kit, and Kinkfur abandoned him in a blizzard just like this one, and left him to die.

I wondered if Crowfrost was reminded of the same thing.

Then my thoughts moved past Crowfrost, and that was when I'd had too much time to reminiscent.

Marshy puddles and creeks had frozen over, but it was a nearby river that caught my eye. Its surface was slick with ice and dusted with snowflakes. If I tried to stand on it then it would undoubtedly shatter.

And I would be submerged beneath freezing water again, except this time Crowfrost wouldn't dive in and save me. There would only be Jayfeather, who would be powerless.

Then it wouldn't be like the time I fell into the lake. It would be like the time Flametail fell through the ice and drowned.

" _Stop fighting it, Dawnpelt."_ I could almost hear Flametail's words again. " _You're only delaying the unstoppable… ironic, isn't it? That I can't save you from drowning, just like how you couldn't save me."_

I didn't feel like I was in control of my body anymore. It was like… like I was just a broken spirit that occupied it. My paws brought me closer to the iced-river and I was powerless.

 _You never quite paid for your crime, did you, Dawnpelt?_ Flametail cooed in my ear. _Not properly, anyways. And murder is a very serious crime. But murdering your own brother, well, that's just despicable. Not even Tigerstar tried to murder his kin._

 _I'm sorry,_ I wanted to yowl. _I didn't know the ice would crack! I didn't want you to drown!_

 _It's too late for that now,_ Flametail snarled. I was so close to the river now…

 _Flametail, please,_ I begged. _Flametail please, don't hate me! I miss you! I never wanted any of this-_

 _Too late now, Dawnpelt. Too late now._

 _Flametail!_

" _DAWNPELT!"_

A heartbeat later and Jayfeather barreled into my side, and knocked me to the ground just before I stepped onto the frozen river.

I was stunned for a few moments but once I recovered from the shock of being pushed into a snowdrift, I jumped to my paws and bared my fangs. "What was that for?" I snarled.

Jayfeather didn't seem intimidated in the least. He actually bared his own teeth and growled, "Mouse-brain, you were about to step onto that ice! You would have fell through and drowned, and I wouldn't have been able to save you. I thought that Crowfrost was being dramatic when he asked you if you'd gone insane, but now I wonder if he was onto something!"

I'd tuned Jayfeather out moments ago. He said something that caught my attention: " _Mouse-brain, you were about to step onto that ice! You would have fell through and drowned, and I wouldn't have been able to save you."_

 _I-I what?_ I glanced back and was shocked when I realized that the frozen river was right behind me. My tail could touch it.

Confusion settled on my features, weighing them down. I lowered my gaze and stared at my paws, miserable. I'd just come so close to death… _why_? And I heard Flametail's voice again, encouraging me to drown myself! What was wrong with me?!

"What's wrong with you, Dawnpelt?" Jayfeather demanded.

"I-I don't know," I whispered. My voice cracked and I hated myself for it. I sounded like I was about to burst into tears. "I just… I saw the ice and suddenly I wasn't in control of my own motions anymore."

Jayfeather snorted. "You weren't in control of your own body. Sure, why not? But if you weren't in control than who was?"

"Flametail," I meowed, before I could think better of it.

The gray tabby tom stared at me. "Flametail?" he echoed incredulously. "Is this some sort of ShadowClan prank that I don't understand? Do you attempt to drown yourselves and then blame it on deceased kin?"

"Of course not," I snapped.

"But you understand how ridiculous anything else sounds, right?" Jayfeather demanded. "That Flametail possessed your body and tried to drown you? Besides the fact that I don't even believe that's _possible,_ why would Flametail do such a thing?"

"Because he blames me for his death?" I meowed, as if it were obvious. It wasn't until the suggestion left my mouth that I realized I believed it. Flametail was bitter with me because I'd killed him, and now he was trying to get his revenge.

Jayfeather studied me for a few heart-beats, as his sightless eyes began to soften. "Do you honestly believe that?" he murmured.

I swallowed the emotions that clogged my throat. "I heard his voice in my head," I whispered. "And… it's not the first time. I heard him before, when I fell into the lake at the Gathering. He said that my death would be ironic, and that I was getting what I deserved."

My shoulders slumped forward. "I don't know what to do," I whimpered.

Jayfeather settled beside me, and later I would think back to this moment, and think about how impossible it would seem beforehand. "First of all," the ThunderClan tom started, "understand that Flametail harbors no ill will towards you. I've talked with him since his passing, and he doesn't hold a grudge against either of us."

My head shot up. I stared at him with wide hazel eyes. "Really?" I breathed. "You've spoken with him?"

Jayfeather nodded. "He said he would have liked to live a little longer, accomplish more, but he was content. He doesn't blame me for not being able to save him, and he doesn't blame you for bringing him onto the ice."

"But then…" my brow furrowed, "why do I keep hearing his voice?"

"My guess? You feel so guilty about the incident that your mind is playing tricks on you," Jayfeather meowed, matter-of-factly. "Or, not so much that it's playing tricks as it is trying to relieve yourself of the guilt."

I frowned. "By trying to _kill me_?"

"Apparently so." Jayfeather narrowed his pale blue orbs in thought. "Answer something for me, Dawnpelt: why did you accuse me of murdering Flametail at the Gathering?"

My fur bristled along my spine. "If you're trying to-"

"I'm not trying to start an argument, Dawnpelt," Jayfeather interrupted me.

"Then I really don't see how this conversation is necessary."

"Just answer the question," Jayfeather snapped. "Unless you want to lose control of your body and try to drown yourself again!"

I growled and took a few seconds to be defiant, but then my shoulders slumped again and I gave in. "Because I wanted someone to blame," I muttered.

Jayfeather nodded. "Exactly. And once you realized that I wasn't to blame, you started to blame yourself. Now you've convinced yourself that you murdered Flametail, and you feel this immense guilt. You've probably carried it for so long that your mind is trying to relieve you of it, like I said. And it seems to think that the only way to do so is for you to die the same death that Flametail did."

Jayfeather narrowed his blind blue eyes. "Dawnpelt… do you believe that you deserve to die because you blame yourself for Flametail's death?"

"No," came my immediate response.

" _Dawnpelt_."

I lowered my head and stared at my paws. My paws were numb, I was freezing, I'd lost my mate, my best friend hated me, and I was a murderer. "Yes," I whispered honestly.

"You _don't_ ," Jayfeather meowed with conviction. I was tempted to believe him.

"I'm the one who convinced him to go onto the ice," I protested. "If I wouldn't have been so demanding then he would still be alive!"

"Dawnpelt," Jayfeather meowed, exasperated, "Flametail had a mind of his own! He could make decisions for himself! _He_ decided to go onto the ice, you didn't force him to do anything! And until you accept that, you're never going to find any closure."

I swallowed, hard. "I'm not sure I know how to accept it," I meowed, inwardly amazed at how easily I was showing Jayfeather my vulnerability. "I've lived with the guilt for so long…"

The other cat was silent for a few moments, and then he asked, "But you're willing to accept the fact, as long as you can find closure?"

I nodded.

"Then I think I have an idea…" Jayfeather murmured. "I'm sure it'll be frowned upon, but it doesn't break the Warrior Code… what if I took you to meet with Flametail?"

My eyes widened. "Y-you can do that?" I spluttered.

Jayfeather shrugged, tensely. "Possibly. However, I believe there's a barrier in your mind that will prohibit Flametail from being able to meet with you. I believe that's why he hasn't been able to connect with you since his death."

My heart sank. "So… I'll only be able to talk to him after I stop blaming myself for his death? But I thought that was the whole point of meeting with him!"

Jayfeather shook his head. "No, meeting with him will bring you _closure_. You'll be able to move on from the accident on the ice. Accepting the fact that isn't your fault is just that: acceptance. It isn't the same thing as closure."

"Then what am I supposed to do?"

"Work on acceptance," the blind medicine cat meowed. "And once you've stopped blaming yourself, then come find me. I'll take you to the moonpool so that you can meet Flametail."

I hesitated, and then nodded. "Okay. I'll do that, but… it'll take some time."

"Understandable," Jayfeather replied. "Do what you will with this advice, Dawnpelt, but I've learned that it's easier to face these kind of things when we have someone to be brave with."

I didn't have to ask him to elaborate to know that he was talking about Crowfrost.

Jayfeather stood to his paws and then started towards the path back to camp. Or, at least he tried to. "Camp is in the other direction," I called over the blizzard.

"Mouse-dung," he cursed underneath his breath. "I can't sense anything in all this snow!"

"Here," I murmured, as I came to stand beside him. I carefully placed my tail across his spine and sort of guided him through the blizzard. Our pelts would brush and I tried not to feel awkward when it happened.

"Thank you," Jayfeather muttered gruffly. "For helping guide me."

"Don't mention it," I replied. "Seriously, _don't._ "

Jayfeather took that to heart and clamped his jaws together. I wondered if he already regretted the thanks.

And then my mind started to drift again. Jayfeather didn't have to thank me, but I did owe him an apology. The problem with that was that I really, _really_ hated to apologize to cats. Rightfully deserved or not.

 _No, I owe him this,_ I thought grimly. _I owed him this moons ago._

"I'm sorry," I mumbled.

"What?" Jayfeather asked. The blizzard had drown out my apology.

"I said _I'm sorry,_ " I meowed loudly. Heat flushed to my face immediately after the words left my tongue.

Jayfeather was silent for a few moments that seemed to stretch out over an eternity. Then he said, "You were grieving and you wanted someone to blame. When Hollyleaf disappeared and we thought she was dead, I felt the same way. If I'd had someone to blame I would have done the same thing."

As the gray tabby tom spoke I gradually felt a weight lift from my shoulders. I was surprised by how light my body suddenly felt. It was like I hadn't even known that I'd been carrying the weight in the first place.

I let out a bark of laughter. My breath billowed into a cloud but at that moment, I couldn't feel the bitingly cold wind or be bothered by the snowflakes that blurred my vision.

Jayfeather snorted, although the noise sounded more amused than condescending. "It feels good, doesn't it," he murmured.

"It feels _great_ ," I breathed.

We continued on in silence for the majority of the trek back to camp. Soon we came across a worn path that our patrols regularly took, and our pawsteps quickened. It wasn't until the camp entrance came into view that I skidded to a halt. "Wait, Jayfeather!" I exclaimed. "We forgot all about your herb!"

I wasn't sure, but I thought I saw the ghost of a smile play across Jayfeather's lips. "What herb?" he asked, before he ducked into camp, and left me alone in the blizzard, absolutely dumbstruck.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

"They need names," Scorchfur whispered, as he gazed at his new kits with more affection than I thought possible. Snowbird hummed her agreement, and I noticed that her eyes reflected the same kind of adoration.

I cracked a grin. "You've just woken up and already you're back to business. These kits don't need to be named right away, you know."

Scorchfur shot me a knowing look. "Come on, Crowfrost. Don't pretend you're not waiting for us to name them with baited breath."

I casually licked a paw. "I've got no idea what you're talking about," I lied.

Snowbird's expression was thoughtful. "I really liked Featherkit and Leopardkit for she-kits and Birchkit for a tom, but now that they're actually here…" she trailed off.

"They just don't seem right," Scorchfur finished. "I agree."

"Am I still allowed to make suggestions?" I inquired.

"Only if you can be serious," Snowbird replied.

I scoffed. "Snowbird, I'm _hurt._ I'm always seriou-" I stopped when both parents fixed me with a stern, somewhat incredulous stare. "Never mind."

Scorchfur turned his gaze back to the kits and exhaled a breath. "A she-kit and a tom. What are we going to name them?"

 _Crowfrostkit and Smokefootkit,_ the names appeared in my mind. I sighed softly, as a bittersweet smile tugged at my lips.

Scorchfur and Snowbird tossed suggestions back and forth, but ultimately dismissed every one. For awhile they simply stared at their kits, expressions hard with thought. Then Scorchfur finally meowed, "For the white tom… what about Blizzardkit?"

I couldn't silence the incredulous noise that rose in the back of my throat. "You want to name him after the worst aspect of leaf-bare?! Scorchfur, how dare you!"

Scorchfur rolled his eyes. "Stop being so dramatic, Crowfrost. I've had enough dramatics to last me a lifetime."

Snowbird gazed at the little white tom. "Blizzardkit," she echoed. "I love it. It's fitting, considering he was born in the middle of a blizzard."

Scorchfur's amber orbs softened as he looked upon his mate. "There's that, but I really wanted something that goes along with your name."

 _Ahh_. Snowbird, Blizzardkit. A blizzard was a type of snowstorm. _I get it!_

If my conscious could roll its eyes, I'm sure it would have.

Snowbird gazed at her mate with adoration. "If he's going to be named after me, then it's only fair that we name the she-kit after you."

Scorchfur wrinkled his nose. "She doesn't exactly look like a 'Scorchkit', does she?"

"We'll think of something," Snowbird meowed, determined.

Silence blanketed the den like a layer of snow. My gaze traveled from Scorchfur to his kits, then to Snowbird, and then to the world outside the den. The marshy ground that was absolutely covered in white snow. The pine trees that also had a thick layer of snow upon their branches, and then to the sky.

Then it struck me. "Sunkit," I breathed. "The sun warms everything beneath it."

"In some cases, it even scorches the ground," Scorchfur murmured. " _Sunkit_."

Snowbird smiled. "Scorchfur… what do you think?"

The gray tom was silent for a few heart-beats, and then he grinned. "I think we just named our kits."

Snowbird purred loudly, and then looked down at the two squirming bundles nestled snugly into her stomach. "Welcome to ShadowClan, Blizzardkit and Sunkit," she murmured.

Scorchfur rasped his tongue tenderly across Snowbird's forehead, and then did the same to Blizzardkit and Sunkit. Sunkit let out a squeak, and we all chuckled.

I watched the new family with a fond smile spread across my lips. _I'm happy for them,_ I thought. _They've waited so long for this moment, and now it's finally here. And it's exactly how I pictured it._

 _Not exactly,_ my conscious murmured. _You're still missing a cat._

I swallowed, hard. My conscious had a point. We were still missing Smokefoot, and this moment felt incomplete without him. Me, Smokefoot and Scorchfur… we'd been through so much as a group. Me and Smokefoot had been through even more just together.

We'd spent forever talking about these kits. Smokefoot was just as anxious for their arrival as anyone else.

 _I know his mate is a Dark Forest trainee, but…_ Hopelessness was crushing my heart. _I miss him. I miss the way things used to be. Maybe I can…_ I trailed off.

 _Crowfrost,_ my concious started gently, _you don't have to apologize right now. Not every fight requires an apology. You could just… visit him. Update him on the kits, tell him they've been named._

 _I bet he doesn't even want to see me._

 _It's worth a shot though, isn't it?_

I exhaled a low, shaky breath. Was it worth it? We'd exchanged so many low blows in our last fight, I doubted that things would ever be completely normal between us. But maybe… maybe we could be close again. Not right now, not right away, but one day. And now was as good a time as ever to try and rekindle our bond.

I just had to decide if it was worth sucking up my pride and admitting defeat.

Maybe I was exhausted, or maybe I was feeling generous after witnessing the birth of Scorchfur's kits. Either way, I found myself start to stand to my paws, and glance hesitantly towards the outside of the den. Only fox-lengths away was the Elders' Den, where Smokefoot and possibly Applefur laid.

I steadied myself and inhaled a breath of cool air. Then, with one final glance towards Scorchfur, Snowbird, and their kits, I padded into the blizzard.

 **Dawn Frost**

My Clanmates were clustered around the Nursery, eagerly awaiting my arrival.

"Are the kits okay?" Pinenose fretted.

I dipped my head. "They're doing great."

"I told you," Honeypaw whispered smugly to Cloverpaw. The dark gray she-cat rolled her eyes good-naturedly, and I assumed that things were back to normal between them.

"Can we see them yet?" Shrewfoot asked, as she took a step forward. "I've suffered out in this blizzard for ages, just waiting to see those kits!"

Waspstripe shot his mother a look of wide-eyed concerned. "Ages?" he echoed. "You told me you'd only been out here for a few minutes!"

I hesitated, then nodded. "Alright, fine. A few of you can see them at a time, but be _quiet_! Don't disrupt the kits _or_ the parents. The elders can go first."

Shrewfoot and Oakfur eagerly entered the den, and I narrowed my eyes. _Only those two?_ I looked back into the crowd of cats, and let my gaze drift until I found the cat was I looking for: my own mother.

My lips curled when our eyes met. She narrowed her yellow orbs, and then a smirk played across her lips. She darted a glance towards the Elders' Den, as if she knew exactly what my intentions were.

I broke contact first and started towards the den before she had a chance to mock me and make me change my mind. My resolve was already weakening.

As I padded through the snow, I could feel her yellow eyes burn holes into the back of my head.

 **Dawn Frost**

I'd only walked a few fox-lengths, but by the time I reached the den I felt like I'd walked from the moonpool and back. My legs trembled, but for once it wasn't because of the cold.

I parted my jaws and scented the air, and was surprised when I didn't scent Applefur. She'd been in the den earlier, but she wasn't right then. _Strange… I never saw her leave._ Maybe she'd left when I was in the Nursery? But I didn't see her grouped with the others, so what could she possibly be doing outside of camp?

 _Stop thinking so much,_ my conscious said. _You're stalling. This is Smokefoot, for StarClan's sake! You shouldn't be worried about talking to him._

 _Really? Have you forgotten about our last conversation?_

No comment.

 _Well… it's now or never._ I inhaled a breath to soothe my frazzled nerves, and then entered the den before I could change my mind.

I opened my jaws and let the words tumble out, "Smokefoot, I know that you don't want to see me right now, but Snowbird finally kitted… she birthed two healthy kits. A she-kit and a tom. We've already given them names, and I-" I stopped abruptly.

Smokefoot was curled up in his nest, but something… something wasn't right.

The den was absolutely silent, except for a few weak coughs. It took me longer than it should have to realize that they came from Smokefoot. But these coughs didn't sound like his usual ones. They were weak and faint. They didn't resound off the walls or rattle his chest.

"Smokefoot," I called softly. "Are you alright? You sound like you're…"

It almost sounded like… like Smokefoot was… giving up…

Suddenly my eyes widened with fear. Horror shot through my veins, cold and overwhelming. _No… no!_ "Smokefoot!" I cried.

I darted towards his body and pressed my face into his side. His sides heaved with every weak cough, but other than that he was completely unresponsive. "Smokefoot," I whispered. " _Smokefoot_!"

No response.

"Jayfeather!" I whispered. "Honeypaw!"

I didn't want to whisper but I couldn't force my voice to go any louder. "Jayfeather," I tried again. "Jayfeather, Jayfeather, _Jayfeather! Jayfeather get in here!_ "

Suddenly Honeypaw burst into the den. "What's wong?" she asked.

"W-where's Jayfeather?" I demanded. "Something's wrong with Smokefo- _where's Jayfeather_?!"

Honeypaw's blue eyes widened. "He's not back yet," she breathed. "Here, let me look at him." She pushed past me and pressed her face to his chest. A few more weak coughs emitted from his jaws.

"What's wrong with him?" I demanded. My voice trembled and shook and I sounded insane. "Honeypaw, what's wr- _Smokefoot_!"

"What's going on in here?" A voice demanded. I spun around and nearly cried with relief when I saw Jayfeather standing in the entrance.

"It's Smokefoot," I gasped. "H-he's not- he's coughing weird, and h-he-he," I couldn't get the words out of my mouth. A frantic sob rose deep within my throat and had blocked their path.

"Let me see him," Jayfeather growled. He pushed past me and shoved Honeypaw out of his way, and then he too pressed his head to Smokefoot's chest.

"Smokefoot?" a soft voice meowed. Applefur appeared by my side, eyes wide with worry. "Jayfeather, is everything okay? What's-" she stopped when she noticed my expression, and then fear replaced the concern that had pooled in her eyes. "What's wrong with him?"

"He can't get enough air into his lungs," Jayfeather murmured to himself. "It's like his lungs are _collapsing._ "

"What's going on in there?"

"Is Smokefoot okay?"

"Crowfrost, what's wrong?"

I vaguely processed Rowanstar's commanding voice, as he forced his subjects' back.

Desperation allowed me to swallow my sob, and I growled, "Jayfeather, _fix him_."

"Didn't you hear me?" Jayfeather snapped. "His lungs are collapsing! There's nothing I can do for him!"

Honeypaw gasped. "You mean it's up to StarClan to heal him?"

Jayfeather glanced at his apprentice. Regret pooled within his blind, pale blue eyes. "There are some illness' that even StarClan can't heal," he murmured.

"You mean he's dying?" Applefur croaked.

Jayfeather opened his jaws, then closed him. He nodded once.

Applefur wailed. My heart stopped beating and my world started spinning. _No…_

"How did this happen?" Honeypaw whimpered.

"He must've inhaled too much cold air," Jayfeather meowed grimly. "The cold must have weakened them… but I'd been keeping an eye on him! He should have been fine!"

"It's my fault," Applefur breathed. "I-it's all my fault! We-We've been sneaking out at night, taking moonlit walks together…"

"You've _what_?!" Jayfeather demanded.

 _No… no, no no! No, this can't be happening!_ I darted forward and curled around Smokefoot. "Smokefoot, you can't die on me," I commanded. "You _can't_! You can't die on me Smokefoot, you can't! I won't let you!"

The only response I received were a few weak coughs.

Applefur started to wail again. Honeypaw started to sob.

"Smokefoot!" I snarled, but the snarl caught in my throat and produced a broken noise. "Sm-Smokefoot you _can't_ …. please don't…"

One more feeble cough left Smokefoot's mouth, and then he was absolutely still. He was as silent as the grave.

He was gone. He was _gone_.

"Smokefoot!" Applefur wailed. She threw herself beside him and buried her face into his pelt, and started to sob. "Smokefoot, you can't leave me here! I can't do this without you!" _It's too late for begging, Applefur. He's gone._ "Please Smokefoot… I can't raise our kits by myself…"

Applefur's plea was just background noise, but some part of my brain managed to register the fact that Applefur was pregnant.

Applefur was carrying Smokefoot's kits.

Smokefoot was going to be a father.

Smokefoot was dead.

My shoulders shook. A sob clawed up my throat and escaped past my lips. For a moment I just laid there, broken and sobbing.

" _Crowfrost…_ " Dawnpelt was there, right beside me. She sounded heartbroken. "Crowfrost… I'm so-"

I couldn't handle it anymore. I felt like I was suffocating in that den. I felt like someone had just attacked my heart and left it to bleed in the snow.

It was the worst pain I'd ever felt in my life.

I lept to my paws and shoved past Dawnpelt, past Jayfeather. I burst out of the den and looked desperately for an escape, until my eyes landed on the camp entrance. Then I pushed and clawed my way past my Clanmates, until there was no one in my way.

I darted out of the camp like death itself was chasing me.

I ran and I didn't stop.

Smokefoot was dead. And when he died, I felt a piece me myself die with him.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **Did you expect Smokefoot's death?**

 **#I would hope not, but some of you have foreshadowing superpowers...**

* * *

 **I'm not going to waste time recapping the chapter, or droning on about my life at the moment. I want to get straight to the point: Smokefoot's death.**

 **Before anyone starts reviewing "woo is me, you've killed off my favorite character", or "how could you be so cruel", or something along those lines, let me stop you right there. Smokefoot's death is NECESSARY. More than that, it's unavoidable. I'm sure some of you have figured this out, but this is Crowfrost's breaking point. Dawnpelt's already met hers and is still rebuilding herself, and now it's Crowfrost's turn. This is going to affect him more than anything else ever could.**

 **I would also like to mention something: Smokefoot's death isn't just a scene I typed. It's a scene that I've** _ **lived.**_ **Roughly a year and a half ago, my own best friend died. He died of heart failure, and it's still the worst experience of my life. The** _**weeks**_ **following his death - his name was Hunter - I was an absolutely broken shell of myself. I didn't eat, sleep, or laugh. I sat on a couch and stared at a wall, and more often than not I was sobbing so hard I couldn't breathe. Sometimes I still cry when I think about him.**

 **If you've ever lost someone so close to you, then I'm sure you can relate. If you haven't then I envy you. You don't understand how lucky you are. I tried to tap into the emotions I felt when Hunter passed and channel them into this, but I will never be able to convey the horrifying grief you feel in a situation like this. It's the worst feeling in the world.**

 **With all that being said, please be considerate when you - if you - leave a review. This chapter means a lot to me, and the next couple of chapters are going to be very personal. The decisions and hardships that Crowfrost is going to face are hauntingly similar to the ones that I faced when Hunter died, so it's going to be a bit of an emotional ride. Whereas Dawnpelt is wrapping up her " transformation arc", Crowfrost is only beginning his.**

 **You've all asked how I could possibly reform Crowfrost at this point, so here you go.**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! I've been burried in homework lately so I didn't respond to many reviews last chapter, but I appreciate every. Single. One of them. I will** _ **try**_ **to respond to each review with a PM :)**

 **I love you guys.**


	18. The Tale of Crowfrost and Smokefoot

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did then Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.** **Also, can we take a second to admire the new coverart, created by ? Thank you, Leafy!**

* * *

 **Chapter Seventeen - The Tale of Crowfrost and Smokefoot**

* * *

" **You're gone, gone, gone away,  
I watched you disappear.  
All that's left is a ghost of you.  
Now we're torn, torn, torn apart,  
there's nothing we can do,  
Just let me go, we'll meet again soon."**

 **\- Of Monsters and Men, Little Talks**

 _He pressed close to his mother as she led him through the territory. He'd never been out of camp before and it was dark; his only source of light came from the full moon in the silverpelt._

 _Perhaps what he remembered most was the bitter coldness that nipped at his skin. It'd been snowing for days, and now the snow was piled so tall that it towered above the weak kitten. Crowkit didn't like the snow very much. It was hard to walk on and hurt his pawpads, and it was freezing! He used to play in it with Runningkit, although Fallowkit always refused to leave their nest._

 _Now both of his littermates were dead. Crowkit wasn't exactly sure how they died. He'd asked Kinkfur about it once, and his mother had snarled at him for it._

 _But his mother seemed to be in a better mood now. She was the one who woken him up and offered to teach him how to play hide-and-seek. Crowkit had always wanted to play hide-and-seek, but with Fallowkit and Runningkit both gone he had no one to play it with. (There were the other kits of course, they but they never really seemed interested in playing with him. Crowkit wondered if they were just waiting for him to die too, like his littermates.)_

 _When Kinkfur offered to teach him the game, Crowkit had been elated. But now he was starting to regret leaving the Nursery with his mother. The territory was so big and it was so much cozier inside his mossy nest, even without his littermates' warmth. But Kinkfur had seemed so excited to teach him about the game... Crowkit knew that she missed her other kits dearly. He wanted to help cheer her up. '_ Maybe this'll do it _,' he'd thought hopefully._

 _But now his pawpads ached, and the snow was sticking to his pelt and weighing him down. Crowkit wondered why they were walking so far. Why couldn't Kinkfur teach him how to play the game back at camp? Was there a special spot in the forest where a mother had to teach her kittens to play games?_

" _Where are we going?" Crowkit squeaked, as he lept over a particularly large snowdrift. He stumbled and fell, but was quick to stand to his paws again. He didn't want Kinkfur to think that he was too weak to keep up with her._

" _You'll see in a moment," Kinkfur responded. Upon noticing her son's forlorn expression she added, with a certain forced cheerfulness in her tone, "I'm going to show you the best hiding spot in the territory!"_

 _The young kit perked up. "Somewhere will no one will ever find me?" he asked excitedly._

" _Yes," she murmured, her gaze trained solely on the path before them. "Somewhere no one will ever find you…" Crowkit briefly wondered why his mother wouldn't look at him, but the question only occupied his mind for a moment. He was going to be the best hide-and-seeker ever!_

" _Do you think the other kits will play with me after-"_

" _Shh, stop asking so many questions. We're here."_

 **Dawn Frost**

' _You really should get going.'_

And yet, I remained still as stone. My claws were digging into the tree branch I'd perched myself upon, and my paws were drenched in dried blood.

I thought it was my blood, but I wasn't sure. I didn't really care whose blood it was, anyway.

I didn't really care about anything, really.

Smokefoot was dead. He was _dead, dead, dead_ , and without him, there wasn't much worth caring about.

' _They're going to start the burial without you,'_ my concious piped up, uncharastically gentle.

 _I know,_ came my response.

The moon had started dipping below the mountain tops, and the sky had yet to brighten. It was still black and merciless and cold and utterly leaf-bare and Smokefoot was dead.

' _You need to be there.'_

 _Probably._ Smokefoot was my best friend, he was the closest thing I had to a brother. He saved my life. Without him I would be dead.

I really, really needed to be there.

Attending a burial was a traditional show of respect. It was a time for cats to say goodbye to their loved ones, and the Clanmates they admired. It was the final time they would see their friends until they joined StarClan themselves.

I really, _really_ needed to be there.

Not only because I was so close to Smokefoot, but because I was the deputy. Not attending the burial would be a blatant show of disrespect. From a nonpolitical viewpoint, it would prove to ShadowClan that I wasn't handling his death very well at it.

It would prove that I was grieving. It would prove that I was normal; that I was just like all of them.

I wasn't supposed to be like them. I wasn't supposed to be normal.

I was supposed to be _more_.

I was supposed to be _invincible_.

And yet here I was: perched upon a tree branch with bloody paws, a numb mind and an aimless gaze; head heavy with dark thoughts and too many regrets.

' _You really, really need to be there.'_

I sucked in a breath and didn't shiver when the cold air touched my tongue. _I can't be._

' _Why?'_

 _Because…_ because why? What explanation could I possibly have for skipping my brother's burial? What reason could I ever dream of to so blatantly disrespect his memory?

 _Because then it'll be too real. The last time I saw Smokefoot… I can almost pretend like he was just sleeping. Like he just passed out. I can manipulate the memory. But to see his dead, lifeless body in the center of camp would shatter that illusion._

' _You're being selfish. If your positions were reversed, Smokefoot would attend your burial.'_

It made two good points: one, Smokefoot would definitely attend my burial ceremony. Two, I was definitely selfish.

I was selfish and I knew it but at that moment, I couldn't bring myself to care.

Seeing Smokefoot's lifeless body in the center of camp… watching helplessly as the elders dragged it out of camp… listening to Scorchfur's sobs or Applefur's wails…

It would be too much. It would break me.

 _Who am I kidding? I'm already broken..._

 **Dawn Frost**

I wasn't sure how long I stayed hidden in that tree. It felt like days, but something told me it had only been hours. I don't even remember climbing down. I just know that one moment I was perched in the tree, and the next, I was treading the path that led back to camp.

At one point I paused in front of a frozen stream and gazed at my reflection. My fur was buffed against the icy wind and dusted with snow, and stuck out at hazardous angles. I had a specks of blood on my muzzle as well as my paws, although I couldn't bring myself to wonder where the blood came from.

My eyes… usually they were alight with mischief or glee or narrowed in irritation or suspecian. No matter what mask I wore or how hard I tried to erase any emotion from my face, my eyes always betrayed me. They were always so full of expression.

That morning, they were dull and absolutely empty.

Empty of joy or glee or annoyance or concern. Empty like a starless silverpelt. Empty like the gaping black hole in my chest.

Empty like Smokefoot's body.

A shiver darted down my spine, but it wasn't from the cold.

 **Dawn Frost**

I wasn't sure how or when I'd arrived at camp. My mind was empty and I'd simply let my paws guide me on their own accord, and somehow I'd ended up here. I'd hesitated outside the entrance for some amount of time. I didn't want to pad into camp and face my Clanmates, but more than that I didn't want to pad into camp and be faced with Smokefoot's body. I didn't want to see him dead and lifeless and cold, with herbs rubbed into his pelt and his eyes closed, like he was simply sleeping.

I glanced at the sky. The sun was just starting to peak above the mountains. Normally the elders didn't bury a body until dawn, but in ShadowClan customs were a bit different. We thrived in the dead of night, so bodies were typically buried a bit before dawn. The elders should have removed Smokefoot awhile ago…

Finally, after my paws felt like they had frozen to the ground, I forced myself to enter camp. The sight that greeted me was one that I had seen many times before, although it never hurt any less. This time seemed to hurt most of all.

Cats were sown across the soggy campgrounds, heads bowed with respect and sorrow. In the center of camp - where Smokefoot's body had almost certainly laid - gathered those who were closest to him. Scorchfur's amber eyes were dark with despair; tears fell freely down Owlclaw's face; Applefur's shoulders shook with relentless sobs.

Somewhere in the back of my mind I remembered that Applefur was expecting Smokefoot's kits.

Smokefoot would have been a father.

I squeezed my eyes shut and inhaled a breath of air that chilled my lungs. The cold air did very little to soothe me, even less so when I realized that the same air had killed my best friend.

I was vaguely aware of the cat that appeared by my shoulder. "You missed the burial ceremony," Oakfur rasped.

I didn't respond.

The elder seemed to understand, fore he simply meowed, "I'll bring you to his grave when you're ready."

 _When I'm ready? I'll never be ready._ The most acknowledgement I could muster was the slightest flick of my tail. Still, that seemed to be enough for Oakfur. He dipped his head and padded towards the Elders' Den - where Smokefoot's nest still sat - and disappeared into the den. His tail dragged across the soggy, snowy marsh.

Another part of my mind reminded me that Oakfur was Smokefoot's father. They hadn't been close when Smokefoot and I were younger, but they bonded when Smokefoot was forced to retire from his warrior duties.

And because I insisted on torturing myself, I considered how Oakfur must have felt when he laid his only son in the ground and covered him with marsh and snow. I wondered how terrible it must be for a parent to bury their kit.

My gaze flitted towards Kinkfur. The mangey elder was already staring at me with piercing yellow eyes.

I wondered if she was recalling that exact same sort of pain.

I mustered all the venom I could in my grieving state and I hoped that she was.

 **Dawn Frost**

 _Crowkit frowned. "This is the best hiding spot in the territory?" he asked, doubtful. "But it's just a pine tree!"_

" _The pine tree isn't the hiding spot," Kinkfur replied, her voice devoid of any emotion. "It's the roots; these roots have a small space carved out that you're just small enough to squeeze into. No one would ever notice you."_

 _Crowkit approached the pine tree and sniffed at its' roots. Kinkfur was right; the ground dipped slightly undeather the roots, so that there was just enough room for a few mice, or a tiny, weak kitten. "You want me to hide in there?" he asked, unable to mask the fear that made his voice quiver. He didn't like this spot… he wasn't sure why, but something felt_ _ **wrong**_ _about it._

" _You don't have to," Kinkfur meowed, as if she sensed his fear. The black-and-white kit turned around to look at his mother. "I understand if you're scared. This is a spot where only the bravest kits hide."_

" _I'm brave!" Crowkit protested._

" _Then you should be able to hide here, shouldn't you?" Kinkfur asked in that same, emotionless tone. Crowkit didn't like that tone. It made him feel anxious, uneasy. He would do anything to change it, so when his mother looked at him expectantly, he nodded vigorously._

" _Good," she meowed, her voice a tad brighter. Crowkit didn't realize the cheerfulness was forced. "Now, crawl underneath the roots and hunker down, Crowkit."_

 _The black-and-white kitten nodded again, this time less vigorously, and slowly started his descent. The roots were chilled and tiny icicles hung from them, stabbing Crowkit when he had to squeeze past them. He winced but pushed through; if this made Kinkfur happy again - if it made her forget about her dead kits - then he would ignore the painful, prickling sensation._

 _When Crowkit finally reached the carved ground a wave of uneasiness crashed over him. If he looked up he could barely see the silverpelt, and the roots twisted and curled in a meanacing way. The dangling icicles looked like tiny claws…_

 _Another shiver shot down his spine, this time not from the cold._

" _Kinkfur," Crowkit called up hesitantly, "I don't like this… I don't want to play hide-and-seek anymore. I want to go back to camp!" he admitted, his voice rising to a wail._

" _Hush!" Kinkfur snapped, and Crowkit cringed in response._

" _But I'm cold," he whimpered, still shivering. "I'm cold and my paws hurt… I don't like it down here. I want to go home!"_

" _Crowkit, stop that!" Kinkfur snarled. "You wanted to learn how to play hide-and-seek, so that's what we're going to do!"_

" _But I-"_

" _Crowkit," his mother started, this time with a softer, sadder voice. "Please… please stop. Please don't make this harder than it has to be." She sounded like she was crying. "Please just… lay down and let's play the game?"_

 _Crowkit was silent for a few heartbeats. He was scared and uneasy and he was freezing, but on the other paw… Kinkfur never wanted to play with him. She hardly ever looked at him. She always looked so miserable. What if after tonight, she would finally treat him like the other queens treated their kits?_

" _Okay," he whispered, laying down. "I'll play… how_ _ **do**_ _you play?"_

 _He thought he heard the tabby queen exhale a breath of relief. "It's easy," she promised him. "You hide, and I count. When I say 'ready or not, here I come', it means I'm coming to look for you. You must stay very still and very silent so that no one finds you."_

" _But you already know where I'm hiding!" the blue-eyed kit protested._

 _Suddenly something hard and cold hit him in the face, and Crowkit squeaked in pain and surprise. "Hey!" he cried, shaking to dislodge the snow from his pelt. "That hurt! Kinkfur!"_

" _It's to mask your scent so that I can't find you so easily," his mother explained, still kicking snow beneath the roots. "I'm helping you win."_

 _Crowkit frowned at his mother the best he could, but the intertwined roots made it difficult. 'It doesn't_ _ **feel l**_ _ike helping…' he thought, rubbing his nose._

" _There," Kinkfur spoke up, satisfied with her work. "Now it'll be fair."_

" _Kinkfur," Crowkit started hesitantly, "I'm very cold… can't we play this game once all the snow has melted?"_

" _No," she immediately responded, voice hard. "We're already out there. I'm not wasting a trip out of camp."_

" _But mama-"_

" _Don't you understand, Crowkit?" Kinkfur suddenly snapped. "We_ _ **can't**_ _go back._ _ **I have to do this tonight**_ _. If I don't then I'll never-" she stopped as a sob clawed its way up her throat. Crowkit could tell she was fighting it, because he'd seen her do it time after time after Fallowkit and Runningkit died._

" _I have to do this tonight," she whispered to herself. "I_ _ **have**_ _to."_

 _Crowkit whimpered. He didn't understand why Kinkfur wanted to play hide-and-seek so desperately, or why they could only play it tonight, but he hated it when his mother became upset._

" _I'll play," he whispered, even as his teeth chattered together. "I-I'll play hide-and-seek, Kinkfur! Just… find me quickly, okay? I wanna go back to camp and sleep…"_

 _Kinkfur nodded, composing herself. "Alright. I'll be quick."_

" _And then we can go back to the Nursery?" he asked hopefully._

 _For a moment, his mother simply stared at him through the roots. Crowkit couldn't be sure, but he thought he saw something in her eyes…_

" _Yes," she finally replied. "Once I find you, I'll take you back to the Nursery. But until I find you, you have to stay hidden here, understand?"_

 _He nodded. "I understand, mama."_

 _Kinkfur stiffened, but relaxed almost immediately. She dipped her head at her son, then turned around and padding back into the snowstorm, presumably to count._

" _Wait, Kinkfur!" Crowkit called after his mother._

 _Kinkfur stopped, but she didn't turn around. "What?"_

" _I love you!" he meowed brightly, despite his frozen paws, chattering teeth and trembling body._

 _For a moment Kinkfur was absolutely still. She simply stood, frozen, as the snow swirled around her and the howling wind buffeted her pelt. Then, without so much as a glance backwards, she padded silently into the storm until she'd disappeared._

 _Now he just had to wait for her to come back._

 _It'd never occurred to him that she wouldn't._

 **Dawn Frost**

Life didn't stop after Smokefoot's death, no matter how rude I thought that was. Warriors still hunted, elders still gossiped, Snowbird's kits continued to mew and squirm; even I couldn't slow down for long. ShadowClan needed their deputy, and I needed ShadowClan to distract me, otherwise I was going to go insane with grief.

Kinda like Applefur.

A few nights after Smokefoot passed, Snowbird woke up the Clan in a panicked frenzy, crying that Applefur had disappeared from the Nursery. Of course it wasn't unheard of for queens to leave camp in the dead of night (at least not in ShadowClan), but even in my grieving state, I could sense that something was terribly wrong.

Patrols were sent out and eventually Pinenose's patrol returned with the missing queen, who was trembling and sobbing. Pinenose reported that they'd found her at the edge of the frozen lake, trying to muster to nerve to step out onto the ice.

I would never forget the identical looks of horror that masked Dawnpelt and Tigerheart's faces.

"How could you do something so lizard-brained?" Ratscar demanded. He never was very sympathetic.

Applefur had merely shaken her head, even as sobs wracked her shoulders. "I-I hear his voice at night…" she'd whimpered. "It's my fault he's dead… h-he wanted to go on all those moonlight walks, and I-I let him talk me into it… it-it's my fault _he's gone_..."

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Dawnpelt disappear into the Warriors Den.

"Oh, Applefur," Snowbird breathed, nuzzling the other queen's neck. "It's not your fault… come on, let's get you back in your nest." Applefur allowed her to lead her back to the Nursery, but I didn't think Snowbird's words had any effect on her.

I watched her go, eyes cold and judgemental. _I always knew a Dark Forest trainee would kill him._

 **Dawn Frost**

I was observing camp with dull interest when Hailpaw sat beside me and glumly remarked, "Ashpaw is mad at me."

I didn't look at my apprentice. "Is she now?" I asked, voice drained of any emotion. I wasn't sure how many days had passed since Smokefoot's death - no more than five - and the wound in my heart continued to fester and grow.

Hailpaw didn't seem put off by my disinterest. "Yeah. We went hunting this morning and she was stalking this lizard, but it looked ready to take off so I jumped on it at the last moment. She snapped at me for stealing her catch, and said I should've just let it crawl away."

"Mhm."

The light gray tom looked at me. "Do you know why she would act like that?" When I shot him a puzzled glance, he looked away and shuffled his paws. "I mean, everyone knows how much… _experience_ you have with she-cats. I thought maybe you would know if something was bothering her."

A heartbeat later and a creamy-colored pelt entering the camp distracted me. Dawnpelt carried a stringy toad in her jaws, which was actually impressive considering that most of the hunting patrols had started returning empty-pawed, but even that feat wasn't what I found most surprising. No, what caught me off guard was the tom at her shoulder.

Jayfeather.

I didn't recall sending the pair out together, so Dawnpelt shouldn't have felt obliged to escort him anywhere. Had she left with him… by her own free will? But why would she do that? Dawnpelt would never agree to spend time with the medicine cat who, at one time, she'd blamed for Flametail's death!

But now they entered camp together, a toad in her jaws and some frosted herbs in his, and they talked almost… almost like companions; like two cats who _didn't_ hold a grudge against each other.

"Crowfrost?" Hailpaw prompt.

I expelled a heavy sigh. "You know Hailpaw, it's not that simple. Every she-cat is unique, they all respond to situations differently. I don't know what to tell you about Ashpaw."

There was silence between us for a time, and then Hailpaw grumbled, "she-cats are strange."

I watched as Dawnpelt and Jayfeather disappeared into the Nursery together. "You can say that again."

 **Dawn Frost**

 _Crowkit wasn't sure how long he'd stayed hidden, but it felt like forever. His teeth chattered tightly together, and his entire body was rigid; frozen solid._

 _It'd started snowing even harder after Kinkfur disappeared to count, and the snow had started slipping beneath the roots and into Crowkit's little hiding spot. At first he'd tried dodging the cold flakes, but there were too many. Now they were sticking together and mounting so high that they reached the tiny kitten's stomach. He couldn't move anymore; he was frozen in place._

" _M-mama?" Crowkit called into the stormy night, his teeth chattering fiercly. "Ma-mama? I-I'm so-so cold! Wh-where are you?"_

 _His only response came from the howling snowstorm._

" _M-mama!" He squeaked, more urgently this time. "Kinkfur, h-help me! Mama, where are you?!"_

 _He started to cry. He was cold and alone and afraid and scared for his mother's sake. What if she got lost? What if she forgot where he was hiding? What if he_ _**died**_ _here?_

 _His tears froze almost instantly, clinging to his face. His entire body shook and trembled, both from fear and the cold. He didn't want to die. He didn't want to die like Fallowkit and Runningkit. He wanted to live, to train as an apprentice, to become a warrior. One day he wanted to be Clan leader, just like Blackstar._

 _He wasn't ready to die yet._

 _He was afraid he didn't have a choice._

" _Mama," he breathed, eyes fluttering shut. Maybe if he took a nap, he would wake up back in the Nursery._

" _I found him! Russetfur, Shrewfoot, Rownclaw, I found him!"_

' _Found who?' Crowkit wondered, as he succumbed to sleep. He tried to force his eyes open but they were too heavy._

" _Where?!"_

" _Over here, he's buried underneath some roots!"_

" _Great StarClan, how did he get under there?"_

" _Poor mite, look at him; he's shivering and covered in snow!"_

" _M-mama?" Crowkit whimpered. "Kinkfur?"_

 _And then, everything was silent._

 **Dawn Frost**

Of course I knew that I was going to react to Smokefoot's death much differently than I had, say, Toadfoot or Littlecloud's, but I hadn't expected _this_. Days had passed since Smokefoot's death, and I was still as broken and miserable as the moment he'd died. The heart-wrenching pain was numbed but that wasn't exactly _improvement_.

With Toadfoot and Littlecloud I'd been upset and I'd grieved, but I never lost sight of my responsibilities. I still sorted patrols, I still went hunting, I still served ShadowClan. Even when Whitewater was killed in the Dark Forest Battle, I'd only grieved for a few days. It was all I could afford, especially when Blackstar also passed and Rowanstar appointed me his deputy.

But with Smokefoot… it seemed that the longer he was _gone_ , the worse I became. As reality sunk in and I was forced to accept the fact that my brother was truly dead, I sunk deeper and deeper into depression. I quit hunting and patrolling, I started shutting my Clanmates out. The only duty I'd really kept up with was sorting patrols, but it seemed like even that was screeching to a halt…

As I sat atop of the Tall Boulder and scanned my Clanmates for the dawn patrols, I had to grit my teeth and clench my eyes shut to focus. Everywhere I looked, I saw Smokefoot. Every pelt was a dark, smokey-gray; every set of eyes were midnight blue. My Clanmates made idle conversation with each other and I could swear that I heard his voice mingling in with theirs'.

 _Focus,_ I told myself, squeezing my eyelids tighter. _Focus. You need two hunting patrols and three border patrols. Put four cats on one hunting patrol, three on another one, and the border patrols can each have three cats. No… two of the border patrols can have four cats, accounting for apprentices._

' _That's it,'_ my conscious encouraged me. ' _You've done this everyday for moons, now. Nothing has changed.'_

 _Yeah, nothing except for the death of my- "_ FOCUS!"

I hadn't meant to shout the word out loud, and if my Clanmates' expressions were anything to go by then they were all incredibly concerned for my mental health. I thought about explaining that I was simply being sassy with the voice inside my head, but somehow I thought that might only make things worse. I considered apologizing for my outburst and for giving them all heart-attacks, but then I realized… I didn't care.

I didn't care about much, these days. I didn't care about checking with patrols when they returned to camp; I didn't care about keeping up my appearance; I didn't care about eating… StarClan, I didn't really even care about sorting these patrols.

"First border patrol," I droned instead, choosing to forget about the outburst. "Ratscar. Take Starlingwing and Stoatfur."

"Second border patrol, Scorchfur. Take Tawnypelt, Ashpaw, and…" I trailed off when a dark gray figure started to appear beside Ashpaw. "And I don't care who else."

"First hunting patrol," I started, tilting my head to the side so that I wouldn't be forced to look into Scorchfur's concerned amber gaze that was slowly darkening into midnight blue. "Ivytail, take Tigerheart and Blossomfall."

Ivytail hesitated before asking, "where do you want us to hunt?"

The response, _I couldn't give two lizard-tails,_ was incredibly appealing.

"What about the pond, where the fox-guards used to be stationed?" Oh sweet StarClan, I was actually going insane, wasn't I? Only insane cats heard the voices of the dead.

" _Yeah_ ," I drawled carefully, "good idea."

Ivytail blinked, caught off guard. " _What's_ a good idea?"

"Nobody said anything," Tigerheart added, while Blossomfall eyed me like she _knew_ I was losing it.

"The pond where the fox-guards used to be stationed," I meowed. "Didn't… didn't you hear-?" _Didn't you hear Smokefoot suggest it?_

Now Ivytail just looked creeped out, and I figured that she was grateful we'd been mates for such a short amount of time. "Uh, sure thing Crowfrost. Come on guys." I noted how the patrol practically trampled each other to get out of camp, and I wished so badly that this was me just messing with my Clanmates for the sake of my own selfish entertainment. But alas, this was no joke.

I was literally losing my mind.

"Crowfrost," a voice murmured softly in my ear, and I clenched my eyes shut when I immediately recognized the voice. I resisted the temptation to glance at the cat beside me, because I knew exactly who I wouldn't see. _Relax Crowfrost, it's not him. It_ _ **can't be**_ _him. He's_ _ **dead**_ _. He's dead and he's gone forever and you're never going to see him again-_

"Crowfrost… Crowfrost look at me."

" _No_ ," I growled between gritted teeth, eyes still squeezed shut. "You're just an allusion. You're _not really here._ "

"Crowfrost-"

" _Go away_!" I snarled. "You're not here, you're _dead._ You're dead and I'm losing my mind and this is all just-"

"Crowfrost, _look at me_!"

My eyes snapped open. That wasn't Smokefoot's voice.

Rowanstar's amber gaze was full of sympathy and confusion, but also a strand of irritation. He didn't know what to think of me, or how to deal with me. I wasn't much better off.

"Why don't you go rest?" he murmured. "I'll finish sorting the patrols."

I knew I was messed up when the desire to protest didn't arise. I didn't care. Let Rowanstar sort all the patrols he wanted to; StarClan, let him replace me as deputy if that's what he wanted to do! I didn't care, I didn't care, _I didn't care-_

I

 _couldn't_ _care-_

 _I was too numb to care about anything, to_ _feel_ _anything-_

 _What's wrong with me?_ I wondered desperately, even as Rowanstar edged me down the Tall Boulder. _Why hasn't the numbness gone away yet? Why does everything still hurt? This isn't how grief works, it lifts after a few days! It's been a few days! Why am I-_

"When's the last time you slept?" Jayfeather demanded, intercepting me as I made my way nowhere in particular.

"Slept?" I echoed dumbly.

Jayfeather narrowed his pale blue eyes so intensely that for a moment I forgot he was blind. "You need sleep," he meowed briskly, more of an order than a suggestion. "Cats who hallucinate during the daytime need sleep."

I couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. "As opposed to cats who hallucinate during the nighttime?"

"Well, at least you haven't lost your sense of sarcasm," Jayfeather mumbled. "Thank StarClan for _that_."

"I don't need sleep."

"Fine then. If you insist on staying awake and doing the very opposite of what you need, then what about closure?"

I blinked. "What?"

"You need to visit Smokefoot's grave and receive closure," Jayfeather meowed, matter-of-factly. "If you never receive closure and accept that Smokefoot is dead, then you're not going to be able to move on. If I were you, I would-"

I turned around and marched straight into the Warriors Den, where I had no intentions of sleeping.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

Jayfeather was staring after Crowfrost, and I approached him cautiously. We'd been getting along well enough as of late, and I didn't want to ruin that. I sat down beside him and for a few heartbeats neither of us breathed a word. Bleak gray clouds loomed overhead that promised more snowfall, and the dread that came along with more snow fit the atmosphere rather well.

"You should talk to him," Jayfeather finally spoke out. "He'll listen to you."

I gave a halfhearted scoff. "Are you serious? I'm the last cat Crowfrost would listen to. Ex-mate, remember?"

"He has plenty of ex-mates," the blind medicine cat replied with a dismissive flick of his tail. "Don't pretend that makes you special."

"You _must_ be the most unsympathetic medicine cat in the history of the Clans!"

"Don't try and change the subject," Jayfeather warned. "Listen to me Dawnpelt, if you care at all about Crowfrost, you'll talk to him."

"I-" I faltered. "Is he… is he really that bad?"

Jayfeather shot me a ' _did you really just ask me that'_ look of disbelief. Alright, I would admit that it was a stupid question. I knew Crowfrost almost better than anyone else; I knew that this grieving version of him was a far cry from his usual self.

"That depends," the ThunderClan tom started dryly. "Do you consider his untimely _death_ to be 'that bad'?"

" _Death_?" I cried incredulously. "But… he's just grieving! How is that supposed to kill him?!"

Jayfeather shrugged, a grim expression on his features. "Grief isn't going to kill him, but neglecting himself will. When's the last time you saw Crowfrost eat something, or sleep? When's the last time you saw him groom his pelt or leave camp?"

I clamped my jaws shut.

"He's deteriorating," Jayfeather went on. "At this rate, if Crowfrost doesn't perk up soon, he's going to be dead before the next Gathering… and that's assuming his demons don't kill him before then."

"Demons?" I echoed weakly.

"Smokefoot," he clarified. "Considering Crowfrost's behavior, I'm going to guess that he's seeing Smokefoot everywhere he looks. Now, I would rather take my own life than tell _him_ this, but Crowfrost is very intelligent. He knows that Smokefoot is dead and therefore whatever he's seeing or hearing can't possibly be him." He shrugged again. "A cat can only handle so much before they just can't take anymore…"

"Crowfrost wouldn't kill himself," I meowed, hoping I sounded more confident than I felt. "He's too strong-willed; too determined. He's-"

"He's practically the tom-version of you, and how did you feel when Flametail died?" Jayfeather interrupted me.

I didn't respond, but that was fine. We both knew my silence spoke volumes.

 **Dawn Frost**

 _When Crowkit came to, the first thing he realized was that he wasn't covered in snow anymore, hidden underneath tree roots. He was back in the Nursery, still shivering as the chill lingered in his blood, but he was back home._

 _But something was off. It took him a few moments to realize that he wasn't in his and Kinkfur's nest, but someone elses. Alarmed, the young black kit looked around frantically, and nearly jumped out of his tiny body when he spun around to stare into a pair of dark blue eyes._

" _Smokekit?" he squeaked._

 _Smokekit grinned. "You're awake! Mama, mama Crowkit's awake!"_

 _Crowkit followed his gaze, and relief washed over him when he saw Whitewater standing in front of his mother. Kinkfur was curled up in their nest, safe and sound. Maybe the cats who rescued him had rescued her too?_

" _Mama!" Crowkit exclaimed, and darted towards the edge of the nest, only to stumble and fall. He frowned and stared at his paws, then was horrified when he realized that he couldn't feel them. They were completely numb. 'What's wrong with my paws?!'_

" _You have to take him back!" a voice snarled, slicing through his thoughts. "He's your son!"_

" _You can't make me!"_

 _Crowkit lifted his head, puzzled when he realized that Whitewater and Kinkfur were the two arguing queens. They'd never fought before. What was wrong?_

" _He's your son!" Whitewater growled._

" _I don't want him!" Kinkfur spat, her entire body trembling._

 _Crowkit recoiled, as if someone had clawed him across his face. 'Are they… talking about_ _ **me**_ _?'_

" _Mama?" he called softly, but he was ignored. 'W-why would they be talking about me? Why would Kinkfur not want me anymore?' Surely he misunderstood them. That was the only explanation._

" _He needs his mother, Kinkfur," Whitewater pressed. "He won't survive without you!"_

" _I don't care!"_

" _How could you not?!" she demanded. "How could you abandon your own son in the middle of a blizzard, buried underneath pounds of snow, and pray for his death? How could you-"_

" _Stop it!" Crowkit suddenly cried, climbing over the nest and racing towards the arguing queens. He stumbled over his paws but he didn't care; he just wanted his mama. "Leave her alone!" he hissed at Whitewater. "Just go away!"_

 _Something flashed in Whitewater's eye - the one that wasn't blind - and she moved to scoop Crowkit away from his mother. "Crowkit, don't-"_

" _Leave us alone!" he cried, baring his teeth into a pathetic snarl. "You're upsetting her!" He spun around and started climbing into his nest. "Mama, are you okay? I kept calling for you but-" suddenly pain exploded within his body, as he was thrown backwards across the den. He wailed in pain and confusion, his entire body suddenly felt like it was on fire, and voices screeched madly in the distance._

" _Kinkfur!" another queen, Tallpoppy, snarled._

" _I DON'T WANT HIM!" Kinkfur screeched. "KEEP HIM AWAY FROM ME! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME TAKE HIM BACK!"_

" _You're_ _ **evil**_ _, Kinkfur!" Whitewater snarled, furious. "How dare you strike your own son!"_

" _He isn't my son anymore!"_

" _Mama!" he wailed, as he rubbed at his face with a numb paw. He yelped when he looked down and noticed sticky red spots on the paw: blood. "Mama, I'm bleeding!"_

 _Suddenly a figure appeared beside him, but it wasn't the queen he wanted. "I want Kinkfur!" he cried._

 _Pain was clear on Whitewater's face. "Crowkit, I'm so sorry, but…" she trailed off. How does one explain to a kit that their mother was abandoning them? "Kinkfur isn't… she isn't your mother anymore."_

 _Crowkit laid his head on her white paw, sniffling and whimpering. "I-I don't have a mama?"_

 _A tongue rasped across his back, warm and welcoming and like nothing he'd felt before. "Of course you do. I'm going to be your mama from now on. I want you."_

" _I want Kinkfur," he whimpered sadly._

" _Kinkfur doesn't deserve you," Whitewater meowed, her voice firm. She picked him up by his scruff and carried him back to her nest. She laid down, then laid him beside her, and continued to rasp her tongue over his tiny, shivering body. Against his will, he felt himself began to relax. "It'll be okay," she murmured._

 _In the distance, he could hear Tallpoppy and Kinkfur. "I won't take him back," Kinkfur growled. "I_ _ **won't**_ _."_

" _Kinkfur," Tallpoppy whispered urgently, "I understand how you feel. I'm so sorry you've lost so much this leaf-bare… Snaketail, Fallowkit and Runningkit. I understand that you must be scared to raise him, but Kinkfur, he isn't like them. From the moment he was born, Crowkit has been a fighter. If you just take him back, care for him like a queen should, then I know-"_

" _I can't do it," Kinkfur mumbled. "I can't watch another kitten die."_

" _He won't! Crowkit was never like your others. If you just try, I know he'll live! He's-"_

" _-better off dead. As a matter of fact, I wish he would have died the night he was born."_

 _Silence._

 _It seemed like ages before Crowkit heard the sound of pawsteps, as Tallpoppy retreated to her nest. Kinkfur settled in their own nest - now just her nest - and soon she began to sob._

 _He'd only heard her cry like that two other times before: once when Fallowkit died, and again and Runningkit died._

 _It was almost as if she was grieving for her third kit._

 **Dawn Frost**

I awoke with a gasp, my entire body shaking and trembling. My sides heaved as I looked around wildly, pale-blue eyes the size of full moons.

' _It was just a nightmare,'_ my conscious soothed. ' _You're fine. You're in the Warriors Den. Breathe in, breathe out…'_

I obeyed, concentrating on the rising and falling of my chest and trying to make sense of everything. _I must've fallen asleep,_ I realized, as I looked around the den and noted my sleeping Clanmates. A few nests were empty, but most cats didn't leave camp in the dead of night so often during leaf-bare; too cold. Much more preferable to sleep in a cozy nest surrounded by Clanmates than march around in the snow.

Which was exactly what I planned on doing.

As I stood up and tiptoed through the den, my conscious hissed, ' _what are you doing? It's freezing out there!'_

 _Exactly. It'll be impossible for me to fall back asleep out there._

' _Crowfrost, you_ _ **need**_ _to sleep.'_

 _No_ , I thought stubbornly. _Not after that. Sleep is the_ _ **last thing**_ _I need right now._

Because with sleep came nightmares of a past that I tried to forget. With sleep came hauntings of a face that hurt to look at.

So I wouldn't sleep. I would march around in the snow and be completely miserable and wish that Dawnpelt was by my side and wish that Smokefoot was still alive and wish that I was dead and be _completely, utterly, totally miserable_.

 **Dawn Frost**

I didn't have a particular spot in mind; I simply walked. My paws moved on their own accord and I let them. When they suddenly stopped moving I lifted my head and looked around, confused. I didn't recognize this place…

It was a small clearing towards the Eastern border, where no one ever ventured. The weeping willow that Dawnpelt and I had spent several nights together wasn't very far off. I furrowed my brows. _Is that what pulled me here?_ I wondered. _There's nothing else out here. Just that willow and a few graves, but-_

I froze.

 _Oh_.

A dry, hoarse laugh clawed its way up my throat. My heart clenched and ached painfully in my chest. Tears pricked my eyes but I stubbornly blinked them back.

 _StarClan, if you're watching me, I hope you understand just how cruel you really are._

I turned around and prepared to run far, far away from here, but Jayfeather's words stopped me. " _If you never receive closure and accept that Smokefoot is dead, then you're not going to be able to move on."_

I breathed in a breath of snow-tinted air then exhaled, shuddering as I did so. "I have to do this," I told myself, even as my voice quivered. "I _have to do this_ … I'm losing my mind. I'm slowly dying. _I can't go on like this._ "

On that final word, I took a determined stride forward and ignored the voice in my head that begged me to turn around and forget this place existed.

 **Dawn Frost**

Even underneath mounds of snow, Smokefoot's grave wasn't hard to find. Only a few other cats were buried here and there weren't any other recent graves. Smokefoot's stood out, and I was drawn to it like a moth to a flame.

I stopped a few paw-steps away and simply stared at the pile of snow. Underneath those layers of snow was dirt, and underneath that dirt laid the empty body of my best friend, my brother. _Smokefoot._

 _Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out._

"Hey Smoke," I finally rasped. I hated how my voice trembled and how those stupid tears were back again. The realization of just what exactly I was staring at weighed my heart down, and I had to close my eyes to keep from totally losing it. "I-I… I hate you."

I laughed, a broken sound. "I hate you _so much_. I hate you for leaving me here, I hate you for effecting me like this, I hate you for taking that Dark Forest trainee as your mate. You could've done way better, you know. I _tried_ to warn you about her. I tried to tell you, _but no_ , you never listened to me. Not even when we were _kits_!"

I shook my head, not even noticing the tears that fell down my face. "Why didn't you listen to me? If you had… you wouldn't have had to sneak around together at night, and this stupid, StarClan-forsaken leaf-bare air wouldn't have ruined your lungs, and _you would still be alive._ You would still be alive and I wouldn't be a miserable mess and everything would still be _normal_!"

 _Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out._

I inhaled, breath trembling as I exhaled. "Normal… nothing about this is normal. I should've gotten over your death days ago, right? I don't even know how long you've been dead, but I shouldn't still feel so _broken_. I-I feel like someone is constantly slashing my heart open and letting it bleed out in the snow, and I-I've never felt like this before. When Whitewater died I was depressed and I wanted her back, but I-I never felt like _this._ I didn't give up like I have now." I blew out a shaky breath. "And it's all your fault, you fox-heart."

I kept my gaze trained on the grave in front of me and pretended not to notice the ghostly, smokey figure that was appearing next to me. It was just another hallucination. Smokefoot wasn't here, he was there, buried underneath all that snow and marsh and dirt.

"You're never gonna meet your kits, you know," I said, because I was bitter and my heart was bleeding. "They're gonna grow up and have no idea who you are, or what you look like, or what your laugh sounds like." The wind was buffeting my face and freezing my tears but I didn't care. I hadn't cared about anything for awhile now. "They aren't going to have a father, Smokefoot. Even if you and Oakfur weren't close when you were a kit, at least you knew he was alive. I… I didn't have that sort of luxury. I know what it feels like to have never met your father."

I lowered my head, still vaguely aware of the ghostly figure. "Applefur almost killed herself a few nights ago. Grief is driving her insane too… when her kits are born - _your kits_ \- I wouldn't be surprised if she turned into Kinkfur and tried to kill them. Because that's what you do when you've finally lost it and nothing is how it should be, and you're so hurt that you know you're never going to be the same again: you turn into a monster."

"And you know what? I'm amazed that there aren't more Kinkfur's in this world, because others _must_ have felt this same kind of grief before. The kind that takes no prisoners; the kind that breaks you down and makes you lose your mind and wish that you were dead. When you're _just numb_ and _you don't care about anything_ because you can't _feel anything-_ "

At some point I'd started _really_ crying. My shoulders shook and I closed my eyes and at that moment, I hated myself more than anyone else in the world.

"I hate this," I mumbled. "I hate what I've become. I hate what you've turned me into. And I hate… I hate that I don't care enough to change it. I hate not being able to feel anything, even though I _want_ to feel something, but _I can't-_ "

A sob interrupted my rambling, so for a few heartbeats I simply cried and let everything out. All the pain and misery and despair and _frustration-_ "What if I never "get better"? What if this is the new me? What if this is how I spend the rest of my life?"

"They say that time heals all wounds, but _they're wrong_. That's just what elders and medicine cats tell cats who are suffering, so that they'll grit their teeth and push on and don't kill themselves because they just want the pain to go away. Time does nothing, except allow the wounds to fester and grow. Eventually you might _think_ you're better, but you're wrong. Because in the end, after every heavy heart and every long night and every desperate prayer, it doesn't change the fact that all you have left is an empty hole in your chest where that cat used to be."

I was crying and was gasping for air and even after I'd said all that I thought to say, I still didn't feel any better. If anything I felt even worse because it was cold and I was sick of crying. Crowfrost, the most amazing warrior to have ever been born, did not cry.

But then again, I wasn't exactly that same Crowfrost now, was I?

"Keep crying," I stiffened when the figure murmured. "Crying isn't a sign of weakness, Crowfrost. Since the moment a kit is born, crying is a sign that you're still alive."

I didn't want to risk it, but I couldn't stop myself. My head shot up and I looked to my side, and when there was no one there I felt like I'd just watched Smokefoot die all over again.

The figure had faded into the cold, snowy night, leaving me alone and heartbroken and so desperate that I considered if maybe Applefur was onto something.

With shaking shoulders and a heavy heart and a mind full of regrets, I lowered my head and whispered brokenly into the snow, " _I miss you_."

If I had been paying more attention, I might have caught a murmured, " _I miss you too, Crowfrost._ "

 **Dawn Frost**

 _Hours later and Crowkit was still wide-awake._

 _Everyone else had fallen asleep. Tallpoppy and her three older kits, Applekkit, Marshkit and Toadkit. Whitewater and Smokekit. Even Kinkfur's heartwrenching sobs had ceased._

 _So why couldn't he sleep?_

 _Hesitantly, the black kit pulled away from Whitewater's warmth and padded towards the edge of the nest, and hunkered down. From there he could see through the den entrance, and the bright full moon that hung in the starless silverpelt._

 _Kinkfur didn't want him anymore. She thought he was better off dead._

 _She tried to kill him. She almost succeeded._

 _But Whitewater had found him, and she had saved him._

" _How did she know I was missing?" Crowkit whispered aloud, wondering to himself. Kinkfur had dragged him out after everyone else was asleep._

" _I told her."_

 _Crowkit squeaked and spun around, only to come face-to-face with those dark blue eyes again. "Stop sneaking up on me!" he huffed, embarrassed._

 _Smokekit padded over to settle down beside him. "I was still awake when you and Kinkfur left, so I woke my mama up and asked her if we could go with you. I thought she would take me since ShadowClan warriors leave camp at night all the time, but," he wrinkled his nose, "she said that_ _ **kits**_ _have to sleep all night. But then she went out and found you, and brought you back."_

 _The dark gray kit turned around and looked back at his mother. "I think she wants to adopt you. She likes you a lot."_

 _Crowkit shuffled his paws. "She shouldn't… I'm better off dead, anyways."_

" _I don't think you are," Smokekit protested. "Besides, if you die then we can't be brothers!"_

 _Crowkit blinked, then raised his head to look at the other kit. "Brothers?" he echoed._

 _Smokekit nodded. "Uh-huh. I used to have another brother named Forestkit, but he died a little bit ago. Now I don't have anyone to play with."_

" _What about the other kits?" Crowkit asked._

 _He scoffed. "No way! Marshkit and Toadkit don't wanna play with me because they're 'too old', and Applekit is a she-kit, and everyone knows that she-kits are no fun!"_

 _Crowkit was silent for a few heartbeats before finally venturing, "Do you miss Forestkit?"_

Smokekit shrugged. "Not really. I don't remember him very well. I think he had green eyes… do you remember your littermates?"

 _He frowned. "I-I think I remember Runningkit. I think he was brown, and I think he had amber eyes… Fallowkit might have been gray, I think. I-I don't remember. We didn't play together much."_

" _Neither did me and Forestkit. Not a whole lot, anyway. He was always really weak, so Whitewater didn't want him leaving the nest." He tilted his head. "I think that's why mama wants to adopt you, because Forestkit died and she misses him."_

 _The two kits sat in companionable silence for awhile after that, gazing at the moon. Then Crowkit whispered, "Do you really want me as a brother?"_

" _Uh-huh. I've always wanted one, so that I always have someone to play with!" He glanced at Crowkit. "What about you? Do you… want a brother?"_

 _Crowkit couldn't stifle the grin that played across his lips. "Yeah… I think so."_

 _Smokekit grinned right back at him, midnight blue eyes sparkling in the night. Then they turned their gazes back to the silverpelt, the moon, the falling snow and the sound of silence._

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **What do you think of Applefur?**

 **#Specifically, what do you think is going to happen to her as the story goes on?**

* * *

 **So... I guess I'm still alive :)**

 **I have so many excuses for why it took me nine months to get this chapter out to you guys, but it can basically be narrowed down to two explanations: 1) life, and 2) it's not easy to write chapters that hit so close to home. As explained at the end of the previous chapter, I know exactly what it feels like to loose someone so close to you because I lost my own best friend a little over two years ago. Now, there is usually no pain, but sometimes it's so painful that it kills me to think about it. That being said, I received SO MANY positive responses from you guys, offering your condolences and some of you even admitting that you've gone through something similar, so a big fat thank-you to all you lovely souls :)**

 **Moving on, Crowfrost's views on grieving and death (etc) are NOT the same as my own anymore, but for weeks after Hunter's death, they were very similar. So if you've lost someone close to you but you don't relate to Crowfrost at all, let me remind you that everyone is different, and everyone reacts to these kinds of things differently - take it from someone whose been there.**

 **NOW. With all that depressing talk out of the way, I can safely say that it will NOT take me another nine months to get the next chapter published :) This was a hard chapter to write because it brought back some feelings that I really didn't want to deal with, and because it was so personal to me I wanted it to be perfect (I still don't love how it turned out, but oh whale), but the next few chapters should be much easier. Fingers crossed!**

 **Once again, shout out to those of you who have stuck beside me for so long! I hope this chapter was everything you were waiting on.**

 **A final note, I have a new poll on my profile that I would love for you to vote on! Thanks!**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! If you have any questions or thoughts, then I will respond to them with a PM! :)**


	19. I'm Sorry for Being Such a Lizard-Brain

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did then Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.** **Also, can we take a second to admire the new coverart, created by InkblotLeaf? Thank you, Leafy!**

* * *

 **Chapter Nineteen - Sorry for Being Such a Lizard-Brain**

* * *

 **"Well I've lost it all, I'm just a silouhette**

 **A lifeless face that you'll soon forget**

 **My eyes are damp from the words you left**

 **Ringing in my head, when you broke my chest."**

 **\- Daughter, Youth**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

A few days had passed since my impulsive quest for closure (because _that's_ what sobbing your broken heart out in front of a grave is: _closure_ ), and I… wasn't sure if anything had really changed.

Some minor things, maybe. The constant ache in my chest had loosened ever so slightly, but not enough to warrant hope. Fresh-kill tasted a little bit less like a mouthful of marsh and a bit more flavorful, but again, that wasn't much. The biggest change was that I didn't see Smokefoot everywhere I looked anymore, and for that I was grateful, but still hesitant to label Jayfeather's methods a success.

I was mulling over these little details and desperately trying to piece together a conclusion when Waspstripe appeared in front of me and said, "I need some advice about, uhm, _mates_."

I wasn't sure whether to scowl or laugh. Why did toms keep seeking me out for advice regarding their love lives? Sure, I had a reputation for wooing even the most stubborn she-cats and the ability to make them melt with a simple smirk, but _still._ Were they just _ignoring_ the whole Dawnpelt incident?

I was tempted to demand just that, but hesitated because this was _Waspstripe_. The son of Toadfoot, who I used to prank nearly every day with Smokefoot, back when we were younger and days were longer and and times were simpler. Besides, Waspstripe was a genuinely good cat. He reminded me a lot of Owlclaw, what with his charming smile and natural-friendliness and desire to prove himself.

In that moment, I vowed to help Owlclaw win over Olivenose, once things settle down and I was (hopefully) back to 'normal'. But until then,

"Alright," I agreed, sitting up and withholding one of those loaded sighs that seemed to escape my lips a lot these days. "What's up? Are you and Starlingwing going through your first lovers-spat?"

Waspstripe's amber eyes widened. " _What_?"

"It'll turn out just fine, I promise. These things might seem like a big deal at first, but I swear, every couple fights at some point or another-"

" _Crowfrost_!" Waspstripe snapped. "That's _sick_! Starlingwing isn't- we're not- _ugh_!" He looked so disgusted with me, so repulsed by the notion, that I couldn't contain the chuckle pressed against my teeth. It was soft and short, but it was the first time I'd laughed in what felt like forever.

"Relax," I soothed, unaware of the tension that bled from my shoulders. "I'm only messing with you. I used to do the same thing to your father; he reacted a bit more aggressively, however." A slight grin played across my lips as I relived those memories, when Smokefoot and I would take jabs at Toadfoot until he was so furious that he would literally chase us out of the camp…

I shook my head and asked, "So, who's the lucky she-cat?"

Waspstripe eyed me wearily until I asked the question, and then unmistakable pride flashed in his eyes. He even puffed out his chest a bit before proudly declaring, "It's Grassheart."

That tiny, barely-even-there grin fell right off my lips. "What."

Waspstripe nodded, his smile bright and genuine. "Yep! I really like her, and I'm… I'm ready to ask her to be my mate."

"But she's a Dark Forest trainee," I reminded him, confusion seeping through my head and onto my features. "She literally trained with the worst cats to have ever been born… she was apart of the group that _murdered your father_ , among other Clanmates… how could you possibly love her?"

But Waspstripe's smile didn't even falter. He shrugged and responded jokingly, "My best friend is one, so why not my mate, too?" When I didn't respond he grew somber and added, "Crowfrost, I know this isn't any of my business, but you loved Dawnpelt, didn't you?"

"I thought I did."

Surprise flickered across his face, but the ginger and brown tom continued. "Well, when you… _thought_ you loved her, that was before she told you that she knew about the attack, right?" I nodded. "So basically, you loved who she was before you knew-"

"What does that have to do with anything?" I interjected.

"I can still love Grassheart because being a Dark Forest trainee doesn't define who she is," Waspstripe pressed. "If it wasn't common knowledge then I never would have guessed that she trained in the Dark Forest, because she isn't an evil cat. She's not Tigerstar or Brokenstar, she's _Grassheart_." I could hear the smile in his voice. "She's brave, caring, easily-flustered Grassheart."

Those weren't the same adjectives I'd use to describe the she-cat, but that was besides the point. The way Waspstripe spoke about her, the smile that lit his entire face, it was painfully clear that he'd fallen for her, and fallen _hard_.

"I know she isn't the most likable she-cat," he went on, "and I know she has a bit of an attitude problem, but we're working on that, and besides, no cat is perfect-"

"She's only using you to make me jealous." I didn't want to be the one to break the news to him and crush his heart, but someone had to-

"Well duh."

 _Huh?_

Waspstripe shrugged. "I know she was. I mean, she went from fawning over you to mooning over me. She's not a very good actress," he added, that smile making another reappearance. "And I know she's still sticking to that plan right now, but it's only because she has a hard time admitting when she's wrong about something, and falling for me was definitely not part of her master plan. But," his eyes softened warmly, "I can tell she loves me too. I can tell by the way she lingers whenever we finish a meal or a walk; the way she slips up and laughs whenever I tell her some dumb joke; the way she glares at Starlingwing whenever he interrupts us, and she thinks I don't catch it."

"And you think that if you ask her to be your mate, she'll say yes?" I asked wearily.

He was practically beaming. "I _know_ she will."

I wasn't so convinced, but if Waspstripe was then I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. So I allowed another small grin, leaned forward consperiously, and began, "Alright, first of all, whatever you do, don't use pine cones. Trust me, I speak from experience…"

 **Dawn Frost**

"Thanks Crowfrost!" Waspstripe chirped, as he padded towards the fresh-kill pile. Starlingwing and Blossomfall were sharing a lizard and laughing about something Ferretclaw had said, and Waspstripe was going to recruit them for his master plan. I sent him a silent prayer of good-luck, and hoped that he was right about Grassheart. Rejection was a serious blow to the ego - not that I would know, of course.

"Where're they off to?" Scorchfur asked, settling down beside me.

"Waspstripe is going to ask Grassheart to be his mate," I responded, grinning as I watched the trio depart from camp. Waspstripe was beaming, Starlingwing was trying to talk him out of Grassheart, and Blossomfall looked thoroughly repulsed by the idea of love.

"And I suppose you had something to do with that?" Scorchfur guessed.

"Only everything," I retorted playfully. "You know me too well, Scorchpetal. Hey, how would you like me to propose to you?"

The gray tom shot me a glare. "I told you to quit that - you _know_ I hate being called 'Scorchpetal'!"

"But it's so perfect!" I protested. "It's catchy, pretty, and fits your docile nature-"

" _Excuse me_?!"

"It's _perfect_!" I said again, grinning wildly. "Smokefoot agrees with me, don't you Smoke-"

I stopped.

Scorchfur looked at his paws. I stared straight ahead and fought to swallow the lump in my throat.

" _Right_ ," I finally exhaled, voice shaky and soft. "I forgot we're never going to be able to joke around like that anymore; just the three of us."

"It's going to take time," Scorchfur sighed. "Smokefoot was an important part of our lives for a long time - yours even longer than mine. We're always going to miss him. But Crowfrost," he continued, turning to look at me with desperation flooding eyes that were definitely amber and not midnight-blue, "you can't shut everyone out like you have been. You're killing yourself, and everyone who loves you is being forced to watch. We've already lost Smokefoot, we can't lose you too."

"I know," I mumbled, as thoughts of a smokey-gray tom swirled around in my mind. "Trust me, I know."

"Whether or not you know doesn't matter if you don't do something about it," Scorchfur reminded me, in that motherly-tone of his. "So _do something about it,_ Crowfrost. Get something to eat, go on a walk, start organizing patrols again. Just… take kitten-steps. One step at a time until you're running again."

"I think I broke my paw."

"You can still limp with a broken paw."

"I think I broke all four of my paws."

Scorchfur rolled his amber orbs, exasperated. "StarClan, this is why we can't have deep conversations with each other." His expression softened and he nudged my shoulder. "But, for what it's worth, it's really comforting to see you grinning and joking around again. Even if it only lasts for a minute."

"It feels weird," I admitted softly. "To smile and laugh and know that I'll never do it with Smokefoot again… it feels like betrayal."

Scorchfur smiled, but his eyes were dark and I realized that he was just as depressed as I was.. "You know, if your positions were reversed, I think he would say the exact same thing."

He shot me a side-glance. "Maybe we could go hunting later?" he offered. "Just the two of us?"

 _Just the two of us._ His words echoed in my mind and I frowned. "Scorchfur, I don't-"

"I understand." He flicked me with his tail as he stood up. "Like I said; kitten-steps. Speaking of kits, come visit them if you feel up to it; they're getting bigger and bigger everyday." Pride flashed within his amber orbs and chased out the darkness, and my lips twitched with the ghost of a smile.

"Sure. I'll try."

Scorchfur bid me farewell and padded towards the Nursery, where his mate and kits slept. I watched him go for a few moments, and wondered now that Smokefoot was gone, did that make Scorchfur my new best friend? He'd always been one of them, but that top title always belonged to Smokefoot. But now that Smokefoot was dead…

 _Scorchfur is a good cat,_ my conscious remarked.

 _One of the best,_ I agreed, because it was true. _He's right up there with Owlclaw and Waspstripe; those genuinely good toms. And everyone acts like ThunderClan gets all those cats._

 _You're not a bad cat either, Crowfrost. You know that, right?_

I licked a paw and pretended I didn't hear the literal voice inside my head.

Scorchfur's tail tip disappeared inside the Nursery, and a heartbeat later a new face emerged from the den: Applefur. The mottled brown she-cat laid down a few tail-lengths away and cradled her head in her paws, shoulders hunched over and green eyes haunted. She was the perfect picture of misery.

 _Smokefoot would comfort her if he was still alive,_ I couldn't help but think. _She was his mate… she's going to birth his kits. And he's not going to be able to be there for her._

" _I can still love Grassheart because being a Dark Forest trainee doesn't define who she is,"_ Waspstripe's words echoed in my mind. " _She's brave, caring, easily-flustered Grassheart."_

Someway, somehow Smokefoot had fallen in love with Applefur. It didn't make any sense to me, but then again, would anyone ever understand how Dawnpelt and I became mates? Maybe sometimes… love just wasn't something you could understand. It was an emotion, and one of the many lessons I was coming to learn was that you couldn't always control your emotions.

Sometimes you fought and yelled, and sometimes you fell in love. And sometimes, in my case, you did a whole lot of both.

 _If our positions were reversed,_ I thought, _if I died and Smokefoot lived, and Dawnpelt was expecting my kits, I would want Smokefoot to take care of her. Even if he hated her, even if he had been horrible to her, I would want my brother to watch over her when I couldn't._

I inhaled a deep breath and, not for the first time, wondered if this whole situation was part of StarClan's twisted sense of humor. Then I stood to my paws and took my sweet time approaching the grieving queen.

 **Dawn Frost**

"Hey."

Applefur's head didn't move, but she raised her apple-green eyes to look at me. Weariness flicked in those eyes, but other than that small flash of emotion her features remained twisted in misery.

"Crowfrost," she meowed, voice hoarse and empty. I barely concealed my surprise because - aside from her feminine tone - she sounded exactly like me. Like she'd given up, or like she didn't care about a single thing; like she could have died right then and she wouldn't have minded.

 _Right now,_ my conscious murmured, _only you two can relate to one another. Even Scorchfur doesn't exactly understand the grief you're dealing with because he has Snowbird and his kits to look after. But you and Applefur have both lost the cat closest to you._

 _Dark Forest trainee or not,_ it went on, _you're more alike than you will ever admit._

A frown tugged at my lips as I studied the queen. She was thin and wiry, so much so that her swollen stomach barely protruded from her sides. I remembered what Snowbird looked like when she was only a moon or so pregnant, and she'd been much more - ahem, _fluffier_ \- than Applefur. The realization was alarming.

"When's the last time you ate something?" I asked, taken back by my own brisk tone.

Applefur looked caught off guard as well. "Ate something?" she echoed dumbly.

"You need to eat something," I meowed, using that deputy-tone that I hadn't used ever since Smokefoot died. I turned around, frosty-blue eyes scanning the camp, until my gaze settled on Tigerheart. "Tigerheart," I called, "bring me a toad. Actually, just bring me the fattest piece of fresh-kill on the pile."

Tigerheart looked at me with narrowed eyes, probably torn between demanding why I couldn't walk to the pile and get my own prey and being amazed that I was actually going to eat something. But when he noticed Applefur he just looked flatout confused, and compiled, if only to see what in StarClan's name was going on.

I nudged the piece of prey - a frog that was considered large by leaf-bare's standards, and would usually be split between two or three warriors - towards Applefur, then gazed at her expectantly. "Eat," I ordered.

Applefur's eyes were murky and clouded as she shook her head. "Crowfrost, I'm not hungry." I knew what she really meant: _I haven't been hungry since my mate died_.

"I don't care. You need to eat."

She lowered her gaze. "Everything tastes like a mouthful of marsh," she whispered sadly.

Sympathy that I never expected to feel towards a Dark Forest trainee tugged at my heart. A frown ghosted across my lips, and I crouched down so that I was at the mottled brown queen's level. "I know," I murmured, because I did. "Trust me, I do. But you have his kits to think about, Applefur."

The queen squeezed her eyes shut, but tears managed to escape anyway. "If he can't be here to be their father, then I don't want them," she whimpered.

I didn't expect her words to strike me like they did, but honestly, I should have. Because while I didn't quite understand what it felt like to be Applefur (there _was_ a difference between losing a brother and losing a mate), I knew what it felt like to be her kits. To be born in the dark, cold, unwelcoming leaf-bare; to be naive and confused and too young to understand why my mother didn't want me and why I didn't have a father like the other kits did; to be tossed aside by my mother, to have her proclaim that I was better off dead…

No kit deserved to go through that, and I would die before I let Smokefoot's.

 _But,_ I thought to myself, as I watched the crying queen, _she doesn't want to hear that. If I were her, I wouldn't want to hear that. I don't want to hear anything, I just-_ I wanted to be left alone. But Applefur had proved just what she was willing to do when left alone, so that wasn't going to be an option.

Still, I had to something, but it needed to be something that wouldn't serve to only push Applefur off the edge. _What can I do or say?_ I wondered helplessly, as she continued to cry like she'd forgotten I was standing right in front of her - or like she knew, but didn't care.

Finally I realized that maybe I didn't have to say or do anything. Sometimes… sometimes you just wanted someone to understand and _be there._ So that's what I would do.

Acting before I could convince myself otherwise, I moved to lay down beside Applefur. Our pelts brushed and I felt impossibly awkward, but a small part of me reasoned that it was better than feeling nothing at all.

I expected Applefur to shrink away, so imagine my shock when she did the opposite. She leaned into the touch and shoved her head into my side and sobbed her heart out. Stupid tears pricked my own eyes, because she was in more pain than she knew was possible and she was scared because she didn't see the light at the end of the tunnel, didn't know if the rest of her life was going to be a bleak and painful as this moment, and she was anxious because she was expecting kits who _would never know their father-_

And _she missed him-_

And she _blamed herself_ for his _death-_

And she _wanted him back_ and _she missed him_ and-

And _I understood_. I didn't understand because there was a difference between losing a brother and losing a mate but I understood in a way that no one else did, because we knew Smokefoot better than anyone else did, and he was gone

I understood.

"I get it," I murmured into her ear, and her shoulders shook a little harder and her sobs became a little more heart-wrenching because she knew that I did.

And yet, even as she sobbed her heart out, I thought that maybe this was what closure really was.

 **Dawn Frost**

 **Dawnpelt's POV**

I didn't bother masking my surprise when I led a patrol into camp and immediately spotted Crowfrost comforting Applefur. Because, well… it _was_ a surprise!

"Whoa," Spikefur spoke up from my side. " _There's_ something I never thought I'd see."

"Crowfrost looks surprisingly clear-minded," Owlclaw added, relief evident in his voice. I felt the same way. After watching my former-mate lay around camp and slowly waste away for so long, to see him consoling the queen was a welcomed sight, no matter how shocking.

Cloverpaw glanced at me, hope blooming in her green orbs. "Maybe he's getting better?" she suggested, like she was hoping for _my_ sake. The thought made my pelt prickle uneasily, because sometimes I forgot that Cloverpaw wasn't as young and naive as I liked to think. She was blossoming into a warrior ShadowClan could be proud of, and if she'd noticed that I was still holding onto Crowfrost no matter how vehemently I denied it, then she was much more mature than I gave her credit for.

"Maybe," I replied casually.

The patrol broke apart and went their own ways. Owlclaw to hunt down Olivenose, and Spikefur and Cloverpaw to demonstrate a new battle move to Hailpaw. The duo hung around each other a lot, I noticed. Not usually alone, and maybe I was reading too far into their friendship, but it wouldn't surprise me if one day they became mates.

I hoped I was right. Spikefur seemed to still harbor a silly crush on me, but I thought he could also tell that I was clinging to Crowfrost (maybe he and Cloverpaw came to that conclusion together), and knew that he simply didn't share a future with me. Still, I valued his friendship. It eased the guilt I felt whenever I looked at Olivenose.

 _Olivenose…_ I missed my best friend. We'd been inseparable since we were apprentices, and to drift apart ( _over a tom, no less!_ ) was slowly killing me. But we were both too prideful to apologize to one another, and besides, I didn't think she wanted to anyways.

I shook my head and scanned the camp for Hailpaw, in order to distract myself. I spotted him outside the Apprentice Den with Ashpaw, and the two apprentices were watching Spikefur and Cloverpaw carefully, analyzing every move and every strike. I didn't want to pull him away from them.

Ever since Crowfrost had shut-down, I'd been taking Hailpaw out by myself and making him train even harder than before, in order to make up for the slack I'd allowed to slip in when Crowfrost and I had been too focused on each other to give Hailpaw the proper attention he needed - _deserved_. He'd earned a bit of relaxation, and besides, he was still technically training.

My hazel gaze wandered back to Crowfrost and Applefur. The mottled brown queen was sobbing into Crowfrost's side, and I saw his lips moving against her ear.

Unwarranted jealousy shot through me. I had absolutely no reason to be jealous. Crowfrost was simply consoling his deceased best friend's mate, and besides, she was a Dark Forest trainee - there was no way he had taken an interest in her (because apparently his grudge against them was so strong that he would _dump his mate for even knowing-_ ). And then there was the fact that we weren't mates anymore, so he wasn't mine, so he could do whatever with whoever he pleased.

The ache in my heart informed me that I still wasn't okay with that knowledge.

I noticed Tigerheart seated a few fox-lengths away from the duo, so I made my way towards him. He glanced at me when I sat down, but waited for me to ask, "What in StarClan's name is going on?"

He begrudgingly shrugged. "As if I know. One moment he's moping around like usual, the next he's ordering me to grab prey for Applefur. They talk for a moment and then she starts crying, and now she's crying on him."

He shook his head. " _Grief_. It'll make you do some strange things."

"Don't we know it," I meowed softly, thinking back to Flametail.

"You know," Tigerheart started suddenly, "it's unbelievable - Crowfrost is selfish even when he's _mourning_. He's acting like he's the only cat whose hurting after Smokefoot, or like he's the only cat to have ever lost someone he's close to. Me and you- we lost our actual brother, and we didn't pout and pity ourselves like he is. StarClan, Smokefoot isn't even his _real brother_ -"

"Since when does blood dictate who is and who isn't family?" I challenged sharply. Tigerheart's rambling struck a cord within me, and I was brought back to _that_ night in the willow tree, when Crowfrost finally let his guard down and told me why he was so afraid of being alone. As far as I was concerned, Whitewater and Smokefoot _were_ his real family. "Crowfrost and Smokefoot were closer than most littermates, and everyone reacts to death differently. How can you sit there and-"

"You still love him." Tigerheart's voice was thick with betrayal and disgust.

My jaw ticked. "Of course I do. It takes more than a moon to get over your mate." My voice was strong and didn't waver, however I refused to meet Tigerheart's gaze. Just because I acknowledge that I still had feelings for Crowfrost didn't mean I was proud of it.

"He seemed to have no trouble getting over _you_ ," Tigerheart retorted. "Or Ivytail, or Pinenose, or-"

"I was different!" I growled. "I was more than just a fling!"

"Did Crowfrost tell you that?" Tigerheart mocked. He narrowed his amber eyes. "Did he ever even tell you that he was in love with you?"

"He-" I faltered. No, no didn't. "He didn't have to. I could tell that he loved me."

Tigerheart shook his head. "You're under the exact same trance he put every other she-cat under, Dusk. Think about it: how many other she-cats have said 'I was more than just a fling, he actually loved me, I could tell'-"

"Why are you acting like such a fox-heart?" I demanded. Of course Tigerheart and I had fought before - lots of times, actually - but he usually wasn't so _cold_. Dread builded in my chest as I realized that this argument was uncomfortably close to that one that Crowfrost and I had - the one that ruined us.

But I relaxed when Tigerheart's amber eyes softened. "Because I care about you."

"You have a funny way of showing it," I retorted.

"We've all seen the effect that Crowfrost has on his flings. They're in denial for moons after he ends things, still hopelessly padding after him. They make excuses for him and think that one day he'll take them back, but," he frowned, "he never does. I didn't think you would be the same way, but you sound just like the rest of them, Dawnpelt."

A growl rumbled in my chest and I glared at my paws, frustrated. _He has a point. I do sound like his other flings. But I_ _ **know**_ _that I was more than that._ "We're not going to agree on this," I finally meowed. "I know Crowfrost loved me. I know it. But I'm _not_ just like the rest of his flings, because I know that there's no chance of us ever reconciling. Too much was said that we can never take back…" I shook my head, heart heavy as I spoke. "I still love him and I'm scared that I always will, but I'm not waiting for him to apologize to me and I'm certainly not going to apologize to him."

Tigerheart leaned against me and I fell into his touch, a heavy sigh escaping my lips. "I'm not some foolish romantic, Tigerheart. I know there's no hope."

"Crowfrost doesn't deserve you," my littermate declared. "No tom does, but especially not him."

"It doesn't change the fact that I'm still in love with him."

"If he ever did apologize to you," he started, "would you take him back?"

I hesitated, because it was a question that I had mulled over before and hadn't reached a conclusion. After a few heartbeats I shook my head and replied, "I try not to think about it. Wishful thinking, you know? Besides," I laughed dryly, "I know Crowfrost. He's never apologized to anyone before, and he certainly isn't going to start now."

But even as I spoke my hazel gaze flickered back to the tom in question, wrapped around a she-cat he used to openly despise. My heart ached in my chest when I realized that I used to be that she-cat, even if it had been different. At that moment I envied Applefur more than any other cat in the Clans.

Tigerheart nudged my shoulder. "He doesn't deserve you," he echoed.

"Thanks Stripes," I meowed, and tried not to think about how I didn't care.

 **Dawn Frost**

When Owlclaw padded up to me later that day I was immediately on guard. His amber eyes were flooded with concern and his mouth was worked into a tense, tight line. He was clearly worried about something - or _someone_.

"Where's Olivenose?" I demanded before he could even open his mouth.

"I was just about to ask you the same thing," Owlclaw replied dryly. "I was talking to her earlier and I-I pushed her, and I said some things I didn't mean, and she stormed off and I haven't seen her since then." He blinked at me. "I'm worried about her, Dawnpelt. She's been really closed-off ever since your falling out, and don't want her to hurt herself. Especially," he continued, glancing up at the sky, "if it's going to snow _again_."

"We'll find her," I promised him. "Don't worry about it Owlclaw; Olivenose probably just needs some space. We won't organize a search party or anything, no need to cause a panic; you scan the around the ThunderClan border, and I'll take the RiverClan border. She has to be somewhere in between there."

"I hope you're right," he murmured, staring at the camp entrance anxiously. I wondered what Owlclaw could have possibly said to upset Olivenose, two of the most laid-back warriors in ShadowClan, but I brushed the question off. We had more urgent matters to attend to.

 **Dawn Frost**

I trucked through the soggy marshes and melted snow and cursed leaf-bare everytime a snowdrift fell off a pinetree and onto my back. Crowfrost really was onto something with his leaf-bare vendetta.

"Olivenose!" I called, my voice echoing throughout the forest. I pricked my ears and strained to catch a response - _anything_ \- but the only response I received came from the freezing wind.

I huffed. "What am I doing out here?" I muttered to myself. "Even if Olivenose _is_ nearby, she won't answer me. I'm the _last cat_ she would-" I froze where I stood, ears perked forward. I knew that scent; Olivenose! I scanned my surroundings for her tortoiseshell pelt but my search was fruitless; wherever she was, she wasn't that close.

I opened my jaws and scented the air, and thanked StarClan when I caught another whiff of her scent. It was almost undetectable, covered by the chill in the air and the marsh, but it was enough. I hurriedly tracked the scent, relief washing over me as the trail steadily grew stronger.

I burst into a clearing, skidding to a halt when a tortoiseshell pelt entered my vision. There, perched in front of the frozen lake, was Olivenose!

But fear replaced my relief almost instantly. The way she was leaning forward, staring at the ice, almost like she was contemplating stepping onto it…

"Olivenose!" I cried out, hurreling myself at the she-cat. "Don't do it!"

Olivenose spun around, green eyes wide and her fur bristling along her spine. When she recognized me she narrowed her eyes and demanded, "Dawnpelt? What are _you_ -"

But I slammed into her before she could finish her question and sent us tumbling. I hadn't meant to, but the ground was slick and anyway, at that moment I would have done anything to get her away from that lake.

" _Dawnpelt!"_ Olivenose hissed. " _What are you doing_?!"

"Saving your tail!" I retorted. "You were about to step onto the ice!"

Her green eyes flew open. "What? No I wasn't! I was just looking at my reflection, you lizard-brain!"

 _She was just…_ I narrowed my own hazel eyes. "Why?"

She scoffed. "What, I can't look at my own reflection? Now get off of me, you crazy she-cat!"

I begrudgingly climbed off of her, though I continued to stare at her wearily. We both shook out our pelts, then I asked, "so you came all the way out to the lake just to look at your reflection?"

"Well, I also wanted to be alone for a moment, however," she fixed me with a green-eyed glare, " _that_ obviously didn't happen. Why did you think I was going to step out onto the ice?"

I shrugged tensely. "Owlclaw said that you guys had an argument earlier, and he was worried you would do something and hurt yourself. And what with Flametail's death, and Applefur's incident the other night…"

Olivenose scoffed. "Of course Owlclaw overreacted and- great StarClan, that tom gives himself too much credit." She rolled her eyes. "I mean, I was upset, but I'm not _suicidal._ "

"What were you even arguing over, anyways? Owlclaw worships you."

"That was it," she replied bitterly. "He asked me to be his mate again and I rejected him, same as last time, and when he asked why I said it was because I didn't want to be with someone who obsesses over me. That kind of love… it doesn't feel genuine. I-"

"You obsessed over Crowfrost!" I exclaimed, unable to keep indignation out of my accusation.

"I was _getting to that_ ," Olivenose hissed. She glared at her paws and said, "Owlclaw told me that I obsessed over Crowfrost the same way that he obsesses over me, and that's why he does it - because he thought it was what I wanted. And maybe… maybe I _did_ think that's what I wanted, but now that I have it, I realize that I was wrong. I don't think anyone could ever really desire that kind of love in a mate; like they see you as an idol, rather than a partner."

She shrugged stiffly and, without looking up from her paws, added, "That's probably why you're the only she-cat Crowfrost has ever been mates with. Really been mates with, I mean, and not just some temporary thing."

"It _was_ a temporary thing," I couldn't help but laugh bitterly.

"But it wasn't supposed to be, right?"

"I didn't think so," I replied, fighting to keep my tone casual. "But Crowfrost… apparently he was meeting with a RiverClan she-cat behind my back, so I don't know what was going through _his_ head."

That caught Olivenose's attention. Her head shot up and she stared at me with wide green eyes that weren't nearly as warm as they used to be. "He was cheating on you?" she asked. I wondered if the surprise in her voice was masking hope.

I hated the thought, and my gaze wandered towards the RiverClan border so that I wouldn't have to look into those eyes. "He never came out and said that, but he implied it. And it was during our fight, so if there was ever a time to release _that_ low blow…"

Olivenose shuffled her paws against the marshy ground. "I'm sorry," she finally meowed.

I gave a half-hearted shrug. "It's not your fault."

There was a silence between us after that. Silence didn't used to bother me, but now, with Olivenose it was tense and awkward. I didn't care for socializing in the first place, but this made me want to cringe.

And so, desperate for words to fill the empty air and for my best friend's eyes to look at me with warmth again, I said, "I never wanted to love him, you know."

Olivenose looked out towards the lake. "You sure about that?" she asked dryly.

I shot her a sharp look. "Come on Olivenose, you know better than anyone else that I haven't always harbored feelings for Crowfrost. I've complained about him ever since I was an apprentice, and he and Ivytail were mates."

"It could've all been an act," the tortoiseshell she-cat retorted bitterly. "I mean, you two were mates and no one suspected anything. For all I know this could have been going on for moons-"

"But it _hasn't_ ," I protested. "I'm not sure we were even mates for an entire moon!"

"Well, again, it's not like I would know."

" _Olivenose_ ," I pressed desperately, "would you stop being so bias and actually _think_ about what I'm telling you? Do you really think I could keep my relationship a secret from you for so long?"

"I don't know what to think anymore, Dawnpelt!" she finally exclaimed, spinning around to face me. "I didn't think you would _ever_ keep anything from me a secret, much less something like this! I just-I don't understand why you didn't just _tell me_. You had plenty of opportunities!"

"Because I was afraid that you would react like this," I replied. "I never wanted to lose my best friend. And I was always going to tell you, I just… I wasn't sure when, or how. I know how long you've liked Crowfrost, and trust me, I felt horrible the entire time we were together, it's just…" I trailed off. "I loved him too much to just be friends with him."

Olivenose looked away again, unable to meet my gaze. Finally she heaved a loaded sigh and softly meowed, "I know you weren't secretly mates for moons. I never really thought that, but I was so angry at you…" she shook her head. "It's so petty, but thinking that you had betrayed me made it hurt less, y'know? I had someone to be angry with. But really, I didn't have a right to be angry because Crowfrost was never mine."

"He was sorta yours," I interjected, flattening my eyes. "I mean, you had those flings-"

"They were just flings," Olivenose interrupted me. "Crowfrost even told me that the first time we spent a night together. I told him I wouldn't get attached, but you see how well _that_ worked out," she finished with a dry laugh. "Anyway, no, he was never mine. Not like he is yours."

"Was."

" _Is_." Olivenose snorted. "Come on Dawnpelt, everyone knows you two are still hung up on each other. Crowfrost does a better job of masking it, but we all notice how he stares at you and Spikefur, and how particular he was when sorting your patrols." She paused. "Well, when he sorted patrols."

I blew out a breath. "Yeah, he's not exactly been keeping up with his duties since Smokefoot…"

The tortoiseshell she-cat waved her tail. "He'll bounce back eventually; he's Crowfrost." I wasn't so sure. "Anyway, so are we… you know… good again?"

I froze and blinked. "You mean you still want to be friends? Even after everything?"

She smiled ruefully. "Yeah. I do. I missed you, Dawnpelt. I've been miserable without my best friend, and besides," she shook her head, "fighting over a tom is _so_ lame. Especially looking back and realizing what a hypocrite I've been lately."

I couldn't help but return her smile. "If you'll take me back, then yeah, we're good." I stepped forward and touched my nose to her ear. "I've missed you too. And I'm sorry for not telling you about me and Crowfrost earlier; you deserved to know."

"Don't worry about it," she meowed, licking my shoulder. We stood up together and she flashed me a smirk. "So, I noticed you conquered your fear of the dark; wanna go hunting tonight? We've never gone in the night before!"

My smile grew impossibly wider and my heart felt lighter as I replied, "Yeah, that sounds like fun."

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **What do you want to see happen before DF ends?**

 **#Besides a reunion between Crowfrost and Dawnpelt, are there any loose ends you'd like to see wrapped up?**

* * *

 **Look guys, it didn't take me nine months to update this time!**

 **I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this chapter. I really like everything I wrote, but I meant to add another scene to the end but I forgot what it was, so now I'm paranoid O.o I'm posting this in hopes it wasn't anything _too_ important, but if it was then I'll just update it. *shrugs* A lot happened relationship-wise in this chapter. Crowfrost and Applefur had a moment, Dawnpelt and Olivenose restored their friendship, and Waspstripe proposed to Grassheart! (More on that next chapter.)**

 **That's about all I have to say on this AN, other than we're nearing the end of DF. There's only about two chapters left, three counting the epilogue. I'm really-super-excited for this next chapter, so hopefully I'll have it out to you guys soon!**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! If you have any questions or thoughts, then I will respond to them with a PM :)**


	20. Part 1 - Simpler Than it Seems

**Disclaimer: I, KatieK101, do not own Warriors. If I did then Crowfrost and Dawnpelt would be the power couple of the Warriors world.** **Also, can we take a second to admire the new coverart, created by ? Thank you, Leafy!**

* * *

 **Chapter Twenty - Part 1 - Simpler Than it Seems**

* * *

 **"So tell me how's the weather in heaven,**

 **'Cause out here it's been rainin' all week,**

 **Tell me what to do 'cause I feel like half the man I could be**

 **If I'm breakin' through, I'm breakin' free**

 **I just need the strength to carry me**

 **But without you here it's makin' me believe**

 **If I'm losin' you I'm losin' me."**

 **\- Matt Musto, Weather in Heaven**

 **Crowfrost's POV**

" _Do you believe in love?"_

 _Shimmerpelt blinked at me, undoubtedly confused. Here I was at the edge of her territory with a fresh shoulder wound, and I wanted to have some deep conversation about love. If our positions were reversed I would probably think Shimmerpelt lost her mind, especially considering how we misused the emotion around in the past. We weren't exactly the type of cats to go to about love._

" _Do I believe in love?" she echoed, drawing out her words. "Crowfrost, are you okay? Should I fetch Mothwing or Willowshine, or-"_

" _I'm fine," I promised her. My heart was heavy and I'd just broken up with my mate, but I was fine. "Just, tolerate me for a minute, okay? Do you believe in real, true love?"_

" _Crowfrost, your shoulder-"_

" _ **Shimmerpelt.**_ "

 _The silver tabby she-cat blew out a frustrated breath, but shrugged and meowed, "I don't know, Crowfrost. I mean, I would like to, but it's hard after everything I've seen..." She sat down, preparing to stay awhile. "You know, I didn't always want to be this renowned seductress. When I was an apprentice I thought true love was real. And why wouldn't I? There were so many perfect examples in RiverClan to look at, to inspire me to think, 'wow, I hope one day I'm that lucky!' or 'I hope one day I have a tom who looks at me like that.'"_

" _So what changed?" I prompted._

 _The RiverClan warrior lowered her sky-blue eyes to stare at the ground. Her features were twisted into an expression of thought, and I realized that I had never seen Shimmerpelt look so… conflicted before. Like whatever memory she was recalling hurt her._

" _My parents," she answered quietly. "I always thought that they had the perfect relationship. They were always so happy with each other, always brushing pelts and laughing and smiling. I knew that one day, when I had a mate, I wanted a relationship like theirs._

" _Then one day my mother, my sister Lakeheart - Lakepaw, then - and me all went fishing together. My mother wanted us to split up and I noticed that she had been acting strange all morning, and I thought she might be sick. So when we went our separate directions I followed her. I followed her all the way to the Halfbridge and there, waiting for her, was a gray tabby tom. I didn't recognize him or his scent, and I realized that he must have been loner or a kittypet. I didn't know what to expect, but I definitely didn't expect her to rush over to greet him, or for him to twine their tails, for them to look at each other like my parents did back at camp…"_

" _What happened after that?" I asked quietly, so as to not shatter the delicate atmosphere._

 _Shimmerpelt looked off towards a reedbed. "They walked away and I didn't have the heart to follow them any longer, so I went back to camp. I planned on telling my father immediately, but when I got there he pulled me aside and told that that morning, Willowshine confirmed that my mother was pregnant again. She was expecting their kits."_

" _Except," I realized, "that you couldn't prove they were his kits. Their father might be her secret mate."_

" _And," she added softly, "he might be mine too. I don't know how long my mother's affair has been going on, but I don't look like her or my father. I'd always thought I looked like one of my father's littermates, but now…"_

 _And suddenly, there was so much that made sense. Lines and dots that I'd never paid much attention to connected, and I found myself looking at Shimmerpelt in a whole new light. 'All this time I thought she just enjoyed flirting and casual flings, but now… she's scared of getting attached to someone and having them hurt her.'_

" _I couldn't tell my father. He was so excited, and I couldn't just shatter his heart like that. When my mother returned I didn't say anything to her. I couldn't even look at her. I think she realized that I knew her secret, because after her first few attempts she didn't try to reach out to me. About a moon later I woke up and she was gone. We haven't seen her since then."_

" _She ran off with her other mate," I realized._

 _Shimmerpelt shrugged. "Probably. We couldn't find her scent anywhere, so wherever she went she didn't want us to find her. My father was devastated. He was convinced those kits were his, and he never got to see them…"_

 _She exhaled a heavy sigh that spoke volumes. "I became a warrior about a moon after she disappeared, and as soon as I received my warrior name toms began trying to court me. I knew they were only interested in me because I was such an impressive she-cat, so I never took any of them seriously. But I enjoyed the attention, as insincere as it seemed, so I gave them exactly what they wanted: some attention, a few casual nights. I never gave them my heart though. They don't deserve it and honestly, I don't think many of them truly want it. We're all satisfied with the way things are now."_

 _She finally looked back at my face. "So back to your question, 'Do I believe in love?' : no. I used to, but that was a long time ago. And it's not even just because of what my mother did. Once I became a warrior I started flirting with anyone - no matter if they already had a mate or not." She laughed dryly. "You'd be amazed how many in 'loyal' toms are willing to spend the night with a pretty she-cat. It's disgusting."_

" _Then why do you do it?" I asked, studying her expression and watching for any hint of insincerity._

 _But for once Shimmerpelt wasn't in the mood to play any games. Her light blue eyes were dark and her posture was ridged, like she'd never opened up to anybody before. She shrugged and replied, "The same reason you do it: it's fun. And… I don't know, maybe my sob story factors in. Maybe I do it to prove that love isn't what everyone thinks it is: it's just infatuation. An intense but temporary passion for someone. It's not driven by anything true or real or pure; it's all a trick."_

" _If that's true then it's a very convincing trick," I meowed, thinking of Rowanstar and Tawnypelt, Scorchfur and Snowbird, or Ratscar and Pinenose. Of Dawnpelt._

" _Well, some cats are more easily fooled than others." Shimmerpelt shrugged and added, "or I'm wrong and true love does exist. But I have yet to be convinced of it yet. Now," she narrowed her eyes and studied me, as if she were trying to dissect and analyze me, "I played along and answered your question, so it's time for you to do the same: why are you here with a bleeding shoulder and depression darkening your eyes? What happened today?"_

 _I really didn't want to talk about it, which I thought was completely understandable. But Shimmerpelt had a point: it was only fair that now I open up to her._

" _Where to begin," I huffed, frustrated just thinking about it. "I guess it technically started with the argument I had with Smokefoot, but Dawnpelt-"_

" _Dawnpelt?" Shimmerpelt interrupted me sharply. "What does she have to do with anything?"_

 _Ohhh right. I forgot that Shimmerpelt despised Dawnpelt. Something about Dawnpelt being the only she-cat that could compare to her, both in skill and beauty. I didn't care to remember the details, but inwardly I thought that Shimmerpelt should just let that go. No one compared to Dawnpelt. No one, not even now that I knew that she knew about the Dark Forest attack and did nothing to warn ShadowClan, or-_

 _ShadowClan knew about our secret, it was only a matter of time until the news spread to the other Clans. I might as well come clean to Shimmerpelt._

" _We were mates," I answered, unable to enjoy the way that her eyes flew open with shock. "But she confessed that she knew about the Dark Forest attack ahead of time, and so I ended things. I can't be mate's with someone who would put themselves above their Clan." I was selfish and I could admit that, but ShadowClan would always be first in my heart. I would always, always put ShadowClan above myself._

" _You were mates with Dawnpelt," Shimmerpelt echoed, as if saying it aloud would make it any easier to comprehend. "That's why you wanted to stop meeting up. Because you actually took on a mate?"_

" _She was the only one I wanted; she still is," I admitted. "I didn't even want to think about another she-cat. But, just in case this ever comes back to you, I might have lied to Dawnpelt and implied that you and I were meeting up secretly behind her back. So if you ever get the impression that she hates you, she probably does."_

" _Eh," Shimmerpelt shrugged. "I can't say that I'm too upset over that. But why would you lie to your mate about that?"_

 _The same reason I'd screamed at her and told her that she murdered Flametail. "Because I needed to hurt her."_

" _Uh-huh. Crowfrost, your views on love might be more messed up than mine."_

" _She hurt me first," I protested. Not intentionally maybe, but she did. When Dawnpelt confessed that she knew about the attack, she ripped my heart out of my chest. She wasn't who I thought she was. The Dawnpelt I thought I loved would never-_

" _You just proved my point."_

" _Huh?"_

Shimmerpelt didn't smirk or raise her tail victoriously. She actually looked like she pitied me when she meowed, "Dawnpelt hurt you, and so you felt like you had to hurt her in return. An eye for an eye, right? That's not love. That can't be love."

 _I narrowed my eyes. "I loved Dawnpelt with everything in me." At least, I thought I did. Now I wasn't so sure._

" _Then why," the silver tabby she-cat began, "would you ever want to hurt her?"_

 _I didn't have an answer for her._

" _Exactly," Shimmerpelt meowed. "You were just infatuated with Dawnpelt, Crowfrost; you never truly loved her. Because you don't set out to hurt the cat you love."_

 **Dawn Frost**

That conversation continued to haunt me, even a moon later.

Shimmerpelt had a point. Why would someone try to hurt the cat they loved? It just didn't make sense. You were supposed to defend and protect those you loved; the very opposite of hurt them.

But the more I thought about it, the more sure I became: I had loved Dawnpelt.

 _Then why did I want to hurt her like she hurt me? Why couldn't I let it go?_

I still didn't have an answer.

"Something on your mind?"

I glanced back at the mottled brown queen. "Is it that obvious?"

Applefur shrugged, the faintest trace of a smile on her lips. "You've been staring at your paws ever since you sorted patrols. Everything alright?"

 _You know, not really. I can't stop thinking about Dawnpelt and how she's a traitor and how I almost don't care and Shimmerpelt doesn't believe in love and she doesn't think I ever loved Dawnpelt and Smokefoot is dead and gone and you're expecting his kits and-_ "Yeah. Everything is fine."

"If you say so." Code for: " _Yeah, so you're full of fox-dung and I don't believe you, but we're both still kind of fragile right now so I won't push you for the truth."_

Thanks, Applefur.

It was strange, how everything was playing out. Not even a moon ago I despised the ground that Applefur walked upon; I wouldn't have cared if she died, honestly. But now here I was, standing guard in front of the Nursery and making sure she ate, slept, and nudged her away from the edge when she hovered too close.

She was expecting Smokefoot's kits. She was his mate.

I might not share that same fondness for her that he did, but for whatever reason Smokefoot had loved Applefur, and I owed him this much.

And I think that Applefur was doing the same for me. She never voiced it, but I thought she kept a close eye on my behavior; was I eating, was I grooming my pelt, was I slowly getting back to my deputy duties, things of that nature. Maybe she thought that she owed it to Smokefoot to make sure his best friend didn't slip into insanity.

I would never tell anyone this, but I was grateful for her close eye. Sometimes I felt like I hovered above the edge too.

I let my gaze drift around the Nursery and it fell on the pure white she-cat. Snowbird - one of my past flings and the mother of Scorchfur's kits - was curled up inside her nest, her tail wrapped protectively around Sunkit and Blizzardkit. My vision started to blur and suddenly Snowbird had fluffy, creamy-colored fur and warm hazel eyes and-

"Have you talked to Dawnpelt recently?"

I threw Applefur a knowing look over my shoulder. "What do you think?"

"I think that you _should_."

"Why?" I snorted bitterly and asked, "because you see the way I stare at her, the way I so carefully sort her patrol, the way I-"

"Because I regret not having more time with Smokefoot, and I don't want you to have that same regret."

I stopped.

She lowered her head, her apple-green eyes welling with unshed tears. "I was so self-conscious around Smokefoot because I felt like I didn't deserve him. After the Dark Forest Battle I felt like I didn't deserve _anyone_. And Smokefoot was such an impressive warrior, he was so handsome and everyone loved him, and when he asked me to be his mate the first time I said no because I was afraid that I was just another fling to him. It took him a moon to convince me that he was serious, and even a while after that I still wondered..."

Guilt pricked my conscious. "I suppose my bias towards trainees didn't help matters, did it?"

She shrugged. Code for: " _what kind of question is that, you lizard-brain? Of course it didn't help! I'm just too polite to shred your ears like you deserve."_

Thanks, Applefur.

"I'm sorry," I murmured, and Applefur raised her gaze to stare at me. "I guess I never really apologized for how I treated you… you didn't deserve that. None of you did."

In all actuality I had no idea what I was saying. Just two minutes ago I had no intentions of apologizing for treating the Dark Forest trainees so coldly, but Applefur looked so depressed and I despised guilt.

The mottled brown queen exhaled a heavy breath. "Crowfrost, if I could go back and redo everything, I would. We all would. It's just- we thought we were _helping_ , and once we caught wind of what was really going on we just weren't brave enough to warn anyone. It was selfish, but… we're only cats. And that's why I've never been angry with you for the way you treated us. Because you're only a cat, the same as the rest of us, and no one is perfect."

Declarations of love and forgiveness made me uncomfortable. See, I didn't usually screw up so when I did, I never knew how to respond or-

"Wait, what did you say?"

Applefur blinked at me. "Just now?"

"That last part," I meowed urgently, mind racing. "What was it?"

Applefur looked at me as if I'd finally tripped over the edge and she was probably scolding herself for not grabbing me in time, but slowly she said, "I said that you're only a cat… the same as anyone else. And that no one is perfect." She eyed me wearily. "Crowfrost, are you okay? Like… _mentally_."

 _Probably not._ "I haven't gone insane if that's what you're asking," I replied, unable to keep the dryness out of my voice even if her question was perfectly justifiable. "Something you said just… it's nothing. Don't worry about it."

Applefur flicked an ear, weariness gleaming in her eyes like unshed tears. "O _kay_ ," she mumbled, not at all convinced that I was sane. But at that moment I didn't care if she thought I'd gone over the edge or not; StarClan, I didn't even care if I'd _jumped_ off the edge! A small fire, some emotion kin to hope was burning softly in my chest, and my mind was racing.

" _...you're only a cat, the same as the rest of us, and no one is perfect."_ Code for: " _Maybe I did love Dawnpelt after all, because maybe I'm just the same as anyone else and sometimes cats say things they don't mean in the heat of a moment, and sometimes they do things they know they shouldn't, and that's okay because in the end, we're just cats."_

It wasn't groundbreaking and I thought it might be what my Clanmates had been preaching to me all along, but hearing it now… maybe Shimmerpelt was wrong. Maybe we hurt the ones we loved because we're just cats, and no one is perfect.

Thanks, Applefur.

 **Dawn Frost**

Or not.

Gazing across camp at Dawnpelt right then, I knew I wasn't ready to forgive her. And somehow that's what hurt the most, because I _wanted_ to forgive her. I missed Dawnpelt. I wanted her by my side, cuddling with me in a willow tree as we shared secrets and fought off leaf-bare's chill together.

But when I looked at her, images of a smoke-colored tom danced tauntingly around in my head. If Dawnpelt had warned someone - _anyone!_ \- about the Dark Forest attack, Smokefoot might never have injured his lungs. He would still be here, alive and waiting for Applefur to kit.

I could forgive Applefur. Maybe not completely, not yet, but I knew that I would be able to eventually. Dawnpelt was different. She'd been my mate - the first I actually felt a connection with. _I loved her._

And thinking it now, I knew that I truly did. I really, truly loved Dawnpelt, no matter what I'd said to her or what Shimmerpelt believed.

And that was why it hurt so much. Because betrayal always hurts worse coming from the one you love.

Olivenose padded out of the Warriors' Den and laid down beside Dawnpelt, so I guessed they were back on friendly terms. The sight only further irritated me because apparently Olivenose was ready to forgive her while I was still brooding, and I found myself glaring off to the side at some random pinecone.

"StarClan, what did that pinecone ever do to _you_?"

"I don't have the most fondness towards pinecones," I replied, raising my gaze to look at Scorchfur. "They're very hard to position; they don't work with you _at all_. Plus the sharp little stabby ends hurt my tongue."

Scorchfur stared at me. "You mean you actually hold a grudge against pinecones?"

"Eh," I shrugged, "what _don't_ I have a grudge against?"

The light gray tom sat down beside me. He was silent for a few heartbeats, and then, "Dark Forest trainees, apparently."

I blinked at him, thrown off guard. "I just had that conversation with Applefur a few minutes ago, how could you-?"

"I think most of us can sense the change within you," Scorchfur meowed. "Ever since you started tending to Applefur, you've treated all of the trainees differently; better. You've masked your bias well ever since we voted on whether or not to choose a new deputy, but I we could all tell that your grudge didn't disappear overnight; you were just careful to not let it get out-of-paw again."

"But now-?"

"But know we can see a _real change_ in you," Scorchfur pressed. "You don't look at Ratscar the same way you used to, or put Grassheart on patrols with cats that you know she hates. And the shift between you and Applefur…" he trailed off.

I shrugged, uncomfortable. "I'm not trying to make amends with them or anything. It's just kinda… happened. Tending to Applefur probably has a lot to do with it," I added, thinking of my apology to the widowed queen.

Scorchfur flashed me a reassuring grin. "I think it's great."

I rolled my eyes. "I bet you do. But don't get your hopes up too high; I'm not about to offer every single trainee their own apology. As far as I'm concerned, the one I gave Applefur covers them all."

"Some things don't require apologies," Scorchfur meowed, thoughtful. "Sometimes, just a simple change in heart is enough."

It was Applefur all over again; something Scorchfur said resonated within me, catching my attention and sending my mind racing.

"Yeah," I said slowly. "Maybe."

I turned to look at the light gray tom and before I could change my mind, I asked, "Do you want to go hunting? Right now? Just the two of us?"

The question caught Scorchfur off guard, but it only took a moment for him to recover and flash me a grin, amber eyes bright. "Sure! Let me go check on Snowbird first, and then I'll meet you by the entrance." I mumbled a sort of response and then made my way towards the entrance, careful not to glance at Dawnpelt or Oilvenose when I passed them.

 _Am I ready for this?_ I wondered, doubt creeping in like frost in the night. Scorchfur and I rarely ever hunted alone, just the two of us; there was always three. Smokefoot always completed our trio. And even on the few occasions when we hunted without him, we always knew that he would be waiting for us back at camp. This time… this time he wouldn't be.

 _Maybe I should tell Scorchfur I don't feel good, and we can go out another time,_ I thought. It wouldn't even be a lie; a weird sort of anxiety had settled in the pit of my stomach and made me want to hurl.

 _You have to do this sooner or later,_ my conscious spoke up, ever the voice of reason.

 _You're right, you're right… I choose later!_

"Ready to go?" Scorchfur's cheery meow froze the excuse on my tongue, and as I took in my best friend, I felt all of the resistance drain out of my paws. He looked so… so _hopeful_. And relieved. Relieved that I appeared to be emerging from my slump, and maybe one day I would be the ol' Crowfrost that he knew and loved.

 _Can I be that same Crowfrost without Smokefoot?_ I couldn't help but wonder. I had a feeling the answer would torment me when I tried to sleep tonight.

But the hope and relief gleaming in Scorchfur's amber eyes was enough to drive that torment off for the time being. I was actually caught off guard by the emotion I saw gleaming in those eyes, and then it occured to me that maybe Scorchfur wasn't as at peace as he seemed to be, and maybe he needed this even more than I did.

I mustered a smile that suddenly didn't feel so forced and said, "Yeah, I'm ready."

 **Dawn Frost**

A few days passed, and I would be lying if I said that I didn't notice the impact these hunting trips had on me.

Ever since Smokefoot passed I had been slowly coming back to myself; I didn't realize it at the time, but looking back it was clear: I wasn't the same cat that I was when he first died. I still had trouble sleeping at night and it always killed me when my gaze drifted towards the Elder's Den, but I wasn't constantly wallowing in my own misery, so that was something.

I realized that I was getting my joy back. It was easier to smile and even laugh, and sometimes Scorchfur and I joked around while we hunted and things almost felt normal again.

Of course, whenever things began to feel _too normal_ one of us would pause and wait for Smokefoot to join in the fun because it just felt so natural, and whenever we remembered that Smokefoot was gone and would never join in our banter again… well, that reminder always stung.

Still, the more we hunted together, the less frequent those moments seemed to occur.

I didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. My immediate answer was that it was for the best; in the back of my mind, though, I wondered if I was forgetting about Smokefoot. I didn't think I could ever forget about him, but when I laid awake at night with only the howling leaf-bare wind to keep me company, the thought haunted me.

 **Dawn Frost**

"Do you think," I started one day, speaking out of my head as I scented the air for prey, "that I'm fast enough to dart into WindClan, snag a rabbit, and race back before anyone notices?"

Scorchfur scoffed. "Of course not. And why would you want to, anyway?"

"I can't stop thinking about that rabbit Starlingwing and Waspstripe saw," I admitted. "I know those lousy foxes ate it when they lived in the territory, but I really wanted someone to win that bet. So what if I pretended that _this_ rabbit was _that_ rabbit and-"

"No."

"But do you think-"

"No."

" _Scorchfur-_ "

" _No._ "

I huffed, thoroughly annoyed. "You know, sometimes you're about as much fun as the rabies."

"You and I have very different concepts when it comes to fun."

"My concept is more fun."

"That's debatable, and _wrong_."

Despite my pout and the dryness in his tone, we were both grinning at each other. This was routine. This was _us_.

Crowfrost and Scorchfur had always had a different dynamic than Crowfrost and Smokefoot. It took about a day for me to accept this, but now I thought that was okay.

Scorchfur scented the air. "All joking matter aside-"

"I wasn't joking."

"-we should probably start hunting." He shot me a pointed look and added, "And we should probably stick to prey in our territory."

"Watch your tone when you speak to your deputy," I retorted, flicking my tail.

Scorchfur rolled his eyes. He hated whenever I used my rank to win arguments. Apparently he considered that to be cheating. I thought he just didn't handle losing very gracefully.

Argument won and my ego satisfied, I opened my jaws and scented the air. One of the many, _many_ downsides to leaf-bare was the fact that it could be difficult to locate prey underneath the ice and snow. I nearly groaned when I scented snow riding on the breeze, a promise of another snowstorm, but I stopped when I recognized another scent.

 _Dear StarClan no, anything but that!_

" _Gotcha_!"

I leapt out of the way and narrowly missed being tackled by Ferretclaw. The gray and cream tom sent a spray of snow into the air, and if it were any other cat I might have laughed when that spray hit Scorchfur in his face.

But it wasn't any other cat, it was Ferretclaw, and just the sight of him made me want to claw my eyes out.

"Ferretclaw," I barely growled, "what in StarClan's name do you think you're doing?"

Ferretclaw took no notice of my hostility and simply grinned at me. "I saw you head out of camp by yourself and thought you might want a hunting partner!"

I glared at him. "I already have a hunting partner. Scorchfur is literally right behind you."

"Who?" Ferretclaw asked, tilting his head in confusion right before he kicked a mound of snow into Scorchfur's face.

"Hey!" Scorchfur sputtered, annoyed.

Ferretclaw kicked another pile of snow at him.

"Ferretclaw," he growled, " _quit_!"

"Do you hear anything?" Ferretclaw asked me, even as he _continued_ to kick snow at Scorchfur.

"Ferretclaw, knock it off," I snarled. "You know good and well that I'm hunting with Scorchfur. Stop acting like such a lizard-brain!"

The idiotic warrior pouted at me, but at least he ended his assault on Scorchfur. "Well, can I come hunting with you two?" he asked. " _Pleaassseeee,_ Crowfrostypaws! Best friends hunt together all the time!"

"We are _not_ best friends," I growled. "How many times do I have to say that until it settles in your thick skull?!"

Ferretclaw ignored my demand and instead asked, "Well, will you at least give me a nickname? I've been reminding you to do that for a while now but all you ever call me is 'Ferretclaw' or 'lizard-brain'."

"I don't give cats nicknames."

"What about Scorchpetal?" he asked, gesturing to Scorchfur.

I hesitated. He got me there.

"I hate that nickname," Scorchfur mumbled as he pawed the snow out of his ears.

"What?!" Ferretclaw screeched, spinning around to confront Scorchfur for the first time since his arrival. "Do you fail to understand how lucky you are?! I would chew off my own tail for one of Crowfrost's nicknames! I'm even missing a kitting to spend time with him right now, and everyone knows that a kitting is a special moment that can never-"

"Wait a second," I froze. "You're missing a- Ferretclaw, is Applefur kitting right now?!"

The gray and cream tom shrugged. "Not quite, but basically. Jayfeather said something about how stressing too much can cause a queen to kit early, and something about how it's going to be a difficult birth."

I know I think this a lot, but right then, I could have slit Ferretclaw's throat and not felt a twinge of remorse.

"You know," Ferretclaw began casually, "it'll probably be even more difficult for Applefur because she doesn't have a mate to reassure her. But I guess that's life." He turned back towards me, smiling like he hadn't a care in the world. "So. Would you like to give me my nickname _before_ or _after_ the hunt?"

I shot Scorchfur with a withering glare. "I'll spare you from dawn patrols for the next moon if you can suffocate him in the snow."

"Done," came Scorchfur's immediate response. Before Ferretclaw had time to process our deal Scorchfur had already lept onto the other tom's back and was trying to force him onto his stomach. Ferretclaw fought back rather well, all things considered. I would have loved to stay for the entertainment, but there wasn't time.

Applefur was kitting and Smokefoot was dead. But I would make Ferretclaw my new best friend before I let Applefur kit alone.

I raced back to camp as fast as I possibly could and prayed that Smokefoot was watching over us.

 **Dawn Frost**

When Snowbird kitted there had been a crowd gathered around the Nursery, desperate to catch a glimpse of ShadowClan's newest additions. I immediately knew something was wrong when I skid into camp and found it nearly empty. Those who were in camp wore forlorn expressions, defeat gleaming in their eyes.

They'd already given up on Applefur and her kits. I honestly couldn't blame them; they weren't supposed to be due for at least another moon, and this hadn't been an easy leaf-bare. As a matter of fact, it was easily one of the cruelest leaf-bares since I'd been born.

I shoved the thought to the back of my mind and marched towards the Nursery. I steeled my resolve when Applefur's screech resounded off the camp walls, and forced myself to remain calm and confident. It was easier said than done, especially when I poked my head into the den and my eyes were drawn to the pile of blood-soaked moss.

Applefur was sprawled across her nest, sides heaving with every painful breath. Her namesake-green eyes were glazed over, but somehow they met mine. "Crowfrost," she meowed weakly. "T-they're coming. Early."

I couldn't help but laugh dryly. "Yeah, I can see that." I padded over to her side and licked the top of her head soothingly. "How do you feel?" Lizard-brained question maybe, but I felt like it was only polite to ask.

Applefur managed a wobbly smile. "It's the worst pain I've ever felt before in my entire life," she meowed, her voice full of mock-cheer. Her act cracked when another spasm rippled through her, and she cringed.

I licked her head again. "It'll be okay," I promised her, and prayed that StarClan wouldn't make a liar out of me. "You'll be fine, and so will the kits. After all, the strongest tom I've ever known is their father."

A pain-stricken moan escaped her lips.

Suddenly Jayfeather and Honeypaw burst into the Nursery. "What are you doing in here?" Jayfeather demanded.

I shot the blind tom an icy glare that was absolutely wasted on him. "Forget about me, where have _you_ been?"

"Moving Snowbird and her kits to the Elders' Den," Honeypaw spoke up. She couldn't bring herself to look at Applefur. "We didn't want to scare Blizzardkit and Sunkit…"

I glanced back at the pile of blood-stained moss and thought that maybe their concern was justified.

Applefur moaned again and a shudder shot down her spine. Honeypaw whimpered.

"Honeypaw, go help Snowbird calm down the kits," Jayfeather ordered. "I'll take care of this one."

"Yes Jayfeather," Honeypaw meowed with a nod. I didn't miss the relief that flooded her blue eyes before she spun around and darted out of the den.

Jayfeather moved towards Applefur's stomach and placed a paw over it. The queen shivered but otherwise didn't protest. I stared at the den entrance, where Honeypaw had disappeared. "Shouldn't Honeypaw be here for this?" I asked. "You won't be here forever, and she needs as much experience as possible."

Jayfeather frowned at Applefur's stomach, almost as if he were frowning at the unborn kits. "No, not this time. I don't want to scar her, especially not if Applefur-" he stopped speaking abruptly.

I narrowed my eyes. "Not if Applefur, _what_?"

"You shouldn't be in here," Jayfeather meowed, dodging my question. "Applefur needs space."

"N-no," Applefur spoke up. "I want Crowfrost to stay."

I didn't expect my heart to swell like it did. I guess I hadn't ever thought about it before, but Applefur… I wasn't in love with her, and she certainly wasn't on her way to replacing Dawnpelt, but she meant something to me. She was important to me.

I would have fought tooth and claw to stay in that den beside her, medicine cat's orders be damned.

Jayfeather huffed, exasperated. His eyes met mine and for a moment I forgot that he was blind. "Fine, you can stay, but you have to do exactly what I tell you to. Don't question me."

I bit back a stinging retort and simply nodded. I was used to giving orders, not receiving them.

"First, go get me some fresh moss." The tom's gaze fell back to the queen. "We're going to need it."

I nodded again and nosed Applefur's cheek. "I'll be right back," I promised her.

Applefur didn't respond, but her eyes met mine and I read her clearly: _hurry_.

I darted out of the den.

 **Dawn Frost**

"Can you tell how many she's going to kit?" I asked Jayfeather as he expertly massaged her swollen stomach.

"It feels like a hundred," Applefur meowed through clenched teeth. Her pelt was damp with sweat.

I cracked a grin, until Jayfeather sad, "Two. Possibly three."

"All this fuss for only three kits?" I mused. I shot Applefur a look. "They've already inherited Smokefoot's love for dramatics."

"And he learned that love from you," she retorted, her voice a mixture of pain and frustration. Mostly pain. "So I guess I have _you_ to thank for this." A perfectly placed moan punctuated her sentence.

I cringed at the sound. "You're welcome."

 **Dawn Frost**

" _Keep her distracted,"_ came Jayfeather's whispered command. " _She doesn't need to focus on the pain."_

 _Easier said than done,_ I wanted to retort. Nevertheless I settled in front of the queen and mustered a convincing smile. "So," I started, voice light, "we haven't really talked about the kits until now."

"I've been," she panted, "a bit distracted."

"Understandable," I replied, and StarClan did I mean it. "Still, I don't suppose you've picked out names yet?"

"I-I want something to remind me of Smokefoot," she meowed.

I felt my smile soften. "I think he would like that," I meowed quietly.

Her eyes fluttered as she murmured a response, and panic flared in my chest. "You can't fall asleep Applefur," I reminded her, forcing the fear out of my voice. I licked her face in an effort to bring her back to consciousness. "You gotta stay with me, just until they're born, okay?"

She whimpered softly even as she forced her eyes to open. "It hurts," she meowed simply. My heart clenched in my chest.

"I know," I mumbled. I looked up to find Jayfeather staring at me, my own sense of uselessness reflected in his blind blue eyes. We were fighting a losing battle, weren't we?

I sighed and laid my head down beside Applefur's. "Just keep on fighting a little longer," I murmured. "It'll be over soon."

"I hope so," she whimpered. I felt her convulse and then shudder.

I wasn't lying. It _would be_ over soon, I could tell that much. But when it was over, would Smokefoot's kits be alive and healthy? Or would they be sickly, or even stillborn?

I looked back to Applefur, and felt my chest tighten with fear as she fought to keep her eyes from fluttering closed. _Maybe I should stop worrying about the kits' lives and start worrying about Applefur's._

 **Dawn Frost**

"More moss," Jayfeather had ordered. I wasn't sure if he actually needed it or if he just wanted me out of the den for a few moments, but I was trying to keep my promise and not question his orders.

I was on my way back with a mouthful of fresh moss when Dawnpelt stepped in front of me, hazel eyes brimmed with concern. For a heartbeat I wondered if my stress was that evident, though I reasoned that every inch of that concern was probably directed towards Appleufr.

"It's been hours since she started kitting," Dawnpelt meowed, matter-of-factly.

I couldn't help but scoff. "Really? What gave it away, the sky?" I raised my gaze to the sky above and barely contained a sigh. It had been light blue when Applefur first went into labor, and now it was black and swirled with twinkling stars.

Irritation flared in Dawnpelt's eyes, momentarily chasing out her concern. "We're all stressed out Crowfrost, there's no reason to snap."

I glared at her. "Oh, I'm sorry. I hadn't realized that you've _also_ been fretting beside Applefur as she moans and wails."

"You're not the only one who's worried about her," she snapped.

"Ah ah ah," I childed her sarcastically, "we're all stressed out Dawnpelt, there's no reason to snap."

"You're impossible," she snarled.

"Well _you're-_ " I caught myself, suddenly uncomfortable with how easily we fell into this routine. Like the past moons didn't even happen. Like we were never mates; like we were never anything more than enemies.

" _You were just infatuated with Dawnpelt, Crowfrost; you never truly loved her. Because you don't set out to hurt the cat you love."_

I inhaled a deep breath, composing myself. My eyes fluttered and when they opened again, Dawnpelt was staring at me as if I'd grown a second head. Clearly it caught her off guard when I slipped out of our old routine.

"Applefur needs me," I meowed, voice steady and calm. "I'll catch you later."

And with that I walked past her, accidently brushing our pelts and immediately missing the sensation more than I thought possible. I decided not to be stubborn and glanced back at Dawnpelt before I disappeared into the Nursery, and was surprised when I saw that she was staring after me, hazel eyes wide and filled with something akin to longing.

I forced myself to look away and pad into the Nursery.

Sometimes it was really, really hard being me.

* * *

 **Question of the Day**

 **What do you think is the fate of Applefur and her kits?**

* * *

 **Funny story, I never intended for this chapter to be split into two parts, but I realized we still had a _long_ way to go and this half was already over 7k words, so I decided to just go ahead and cut it. Plus, this way, I can get it out to you guys sooner :) **

**Rest assured, Applefur's kits _will be born next chapter_! I'd meant for them to be born this chapter, but, like I said, it was getting too long. **

**DF has almost reached 600 reviews, and guys... thank you all so much. You don't understand how much this means to me. It's not just a number; I've read every single review. Some have made me laugh, others have made me cry, and they've all impacted me as a writer in some way or another. So, to every user or guest who has ever left a review: _thank you_!**

 **Crowfrost and Dawnpelt's story is nearing it's end. Thanks to my decision to split this chapter into two parts, w** **e now have two chapters left; three if you're including the epilogue. We're in the home stretch** **, and it's as exciting as it is bittersweet! :')**

 **Reviews are the best motivation! If you have any questions or thoughts, then I will respond to them with a PM :)**


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